Portal:Music

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The Music Portal
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Music, first explored by Charles Darwin in the 1800s, is often considered an art form. It typically features a rhythm or beat, though some argue that it functions more like a hypnotic tool used by artists to sell CDs. When music is played, it often makes people want to dance, as its infectious rhythm seems to take control of the body. This effect is sometimes attributed to music's ability to disrupt the nervous system. Some scientists even suggest that music could be a form of disease, which may explain the premature deaths of famous musicians like Elvis and Jesus. Drummers, in particular, seem to suffer the most. Interestingly, those with no musical talent—like birds or bands such as Blink-182 and Oasis—are said to be immune. Ultimately, music may exist solely to drive listeners mad. It can take many forms, including singing, strumming, or blowing, all of which can push the boundaries of sanity. (See more...)

Featured Article
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Developed as a practical joke, Cleveland's Rock and Roll Hall of Fame opened its doors, no, it threw open its doors, to an adoring public in 1984. They ran and tripped and fell over themselves to finally get into an edifice dedicated to modern-day Gods and Goddesses. And even though some attendees compared it to entering the gates of heaven which led directly to the bowels of hell, some stayed and never left. Thusly born and well on its way to cremation, the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame burst upon the consciousness of museum and theme-park goers everywhere.

Music in the News
"What?"

VIENNA, Austria – At a dinner party planned by his live-in girlfriend and attended, for the most part, by her friends, Ludwig van Beethoven admitted to the one friend he was allowed to invite that he hears just fine, thank you very much.

"Feigning a state of deafness is the only way I can get time to myself to make music." he said, between sips of brandy from his favorite pewter mug, "Before, it was all 'Blah, blah, blah. Wiggy, you need to listen to me. Blah, blah, blah'. I'd just get through the 'Dah-dah-dah dum' and she'd come clomping into the room to unburden herself of a lengthy monologue..."

Featured Image
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If John Lennon was the Walrus, then why is this Paulrus part of the Beatles exhibit at the Museum of Natural Science and History?
Featured Artist
All you care about is me being bald?

Sinéad O'Connor, is a popular yet peculiar and rare Irish singer-songwriter, a Rastafari adherent, and the current Emperor of the United States.

Born in the bonnie bonnie land of wee fairies and angry anarchists, O'Connor came to the fore early in the 1980s with the rolicking ballad Smish te Cat'hloc Cherch, Jah, and became known for her act of tearing up a picture of the Pope for covering up - thus actually encouraging - child molestation, and for giving a handjob to his Chief of Staff, Fadda Murphy.

Sinéad O'Connor was the founder and pioneer of the "Bald-Headed Hot Chicks" fashion movement, which later included Demi Moore, Sigourney Weaver, Natalie Portman, Britney Spears, and that dead chick from the first Star Trek movie. However, because she came before the big wave of hot bald chicks, no guys at the time thought she was hot.

Featured UnTunes
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Middle-Aged Suburban White Guy Rap
Yo homies, my rhymes are much better than crack
So pull up a chair and put down that smack
And don’t get in my face cuz my man’s got my back
It’s the Middle Aged Suburban White Guy Rap
Check it out, G. Am I a bad buttocked mother hugger or what? Ha ha ha!
It’s the American dream, the life that I got – 2 kids and a wife, a Beemer, a dog
I’m not so good looking and I got a big gut
But I’m white and I’m rich and that’s more than enough

(Full lyrics...)

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