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Antonio Travis Scott Brown, Sr. , also known as AB or Mr. Man Tits, is the greatest receiver of all time and rapper, and dancer, and masked singer. Don't like it, I suuuue you. The franchise face of the Pittsburgh Steelers starting in 2010, he saved it by his hard work and is the greatest receiver of all time. You hear me? Of ALL TIME! He is from the Pit, not the palace, and made the Pit what it became known for. Big Ben is a meany poopyhead and so is Coach Tomlin.
He's the most humble man on the ...
Alright, cut. Antonio! You know we're not supposed to write a biased article for you, right? And are you sure you want me to write in that amateur tone?
"I gotta whooole lotta money! Who you think you are? You don't make me look good on Weeniepedia Imma sue yo ass!" (Full article...)
Featured today, a long long time ago
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Did you know...
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- ... that if you fold your arms and try to touch your feet you look like a complete fucking fool?
- ... that the Rorschach inkblots all look kinda like my Aunt Gladys giving head to Satan?
- ... that I am Batman?
- ... that male vampires are delighted when the female vampire goes on her period?
- ... that food is probably the most addictive substance known to man? Withdrawal symptoms include nausea, hallucinations and possibly death?
- ... that reading this DYK suggestion just wasted 10 seconds of your life?
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In the news
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On this day...
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January 31: National Ice Cream Day
- 201 AD - Ice cream is invented in Rome, but it quickly melts due to the lack of refrigerators, everyone is forced to slurp it.
- 1804 - French explorers with sensitive teeth steal the secrets of refrigeration from a tribe in north Africa, who they smear as filthy savages.
- 1819 - Heinrich Zoller creates a means to produce dots from ice cream, his recipe is later stolen by Samuel Dippin, who patents his invention and sells it inside malls.
- 1928 - Stalin re-invents ice cream and names it Stalin Cream, USSR rejoices but the American scum looses there underwear.
- 1979 - Ben and Jerry's "Popped Cherry" flavor ice cream is an initial hit with the young male demo, but sales ends in disappointment.
- 1991 - Dunkin' Donuts loses a hedge-trimming contest to Dairy Queen.
- 2000 - 88 lucky amusement park guests enjoyed the thrilling Alaska Roller Coaster Ride 261.
- 2009 - After a nationwide cat infestation, Ben & Jerry's introduces new "Litter Crunch" flavor.
- 2010 - James Cameron's ice cream based on the hit movie Avatar starts being sold, and somehow manages to sell even more than the movie itself.
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Today's featured picture
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"And yea, God did provide Happy Meals unto them, for they were the hungry 5000. And blessed were the free toys...And on the third day the burgers and fries were reheated and served again...and he saw that it was good. [McCheese 15:24]"
Image credit: Mhaille
View image · Nominate new image · View all featured images
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Writer and Noob of the Month
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Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome!
So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore.
Let us all clap for him because I said so.
Oh my god! There are no more days left! It's today or miss the boat to nominate and vote for Writer of the Month, Noob of the Month and Uncyclopedian of the Month! Get voting!
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Uncyclopedia's Sista Projects
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