Babel:Te

Welcome to WikiTestament

The free Internet Bible that anyone can edit.

God has written 36,927 Bible stories since opening in AD 1.

Before editing, please check your sources with God, or you will be banished to the wasteland that is Wikipedia.

Browse: Politics - Games - Computers - People - Quaint - Coherent
Most Popular - Alphabetical Index - Other Categories...

THE WIKI CREED
For I testify unto every man that heareth the words of the prophecy of this book,
If any man shall add unto these things, God shall add unto him the plagues that are written in this book;
and if any man shall take away from the words of the book of this prophecy, God shall take away his part out of the book of life
—Revelation 22:19-17
NOW GO EDIT SOME STUFF!

Platinum is an extremely expensive, yet highly ordinary metal. It is essentially one of over ninety silverly metals. Gold and Copper, the colorful ones, are the envy of Platinum to no end. Then why is it so expensive? Because Platinum is literally the most anti-social metal ever. It refuses to react with anything, even Halogens, and almost every single acid known to science can not even stain it. One thing that can react with it is Aqua Regia, meaning royal water. It is arrogantly so named because it can react with the kings of metals Gold and Platinum. Talk about ego! Platinum is commonly used by people in high grade laboratory equipment and in jewelry for people who consider themselves too posh to use common gold jewelry. It can also be found residing in the Earth's crust at a concentration of roughly one part per billion. Platinum is the 78th element of the periodic table, it is derived from the Latin word "Platina" which literally means "Little silver", despite costing roughly 60 times more than silver. (Full article...) Recently featured: Uncycloversity:Rejection Notice Joseph Stalin HowTo:Spell Volodymyr Zelenskyy Confucius Say: Me Love You Really Long Time Archive · Vote for featured articles · You can vote for your favorite passages to be featured. Books Genesis More of the best of the Bible edit Selected Anniversaries {{Anniv}}	edit Recent news: Ukraine wins Eurovision Mark Ruffalo professes love of war (Pictured) "Weird Al" Yankovic's 15th album: All you DIDN'T want to know Nick News: Will Smith banned from Oscars MTG tells cops she does not understand jokes "Weird Al" Yankovic gives the Russian Invasion a serious treatment Fans to SNL: Give n00b more screen time Hollywood has changed its name Albert Pujols returns to St. Louis Cleveland Browns bring in "manly man" Finland is canceling its embarrassing history with Russia Boney M and Dschinghis Khan rewrite Russia-themed hits Covid-positive Earl kills Queen in NBC reboot UnNews remembers Mark Lanegan and some more important stuff Dog bites alien Putin's mum issues apology from afterlife This popular article is restricted due to low creator history Spotify makes another huge mistake The fork is about to invade the spoon Rams bar Bengals from playing in Super Bowl Boney M removes Neil Young cover from Spotify Hundreds of Patients are Stuck in Oregon Hospital Beds Bob Saget writes ultimate dirty joke, dies from shock Weezer makes Death angry Rivers gets promoted by President Biden UnNews' Exclusive Interview with God: Part 3 Ongoing: Russian Invasion · ABBA · COVID-19 Recent deaths: Sam Smith (No, not the singer. Some old basketball player nobody's ever heard of.) Upcoming deaths: Vladimir Putin More Recent News edit Did You Know... ... that neither cows nor foxes can run for governor in Wisconsin?
edit Recent articles G.I. Jane G.I. Jane 2 UnTunes:Santa Baby This is not an Article, it's a Sandwich Fairytale UnTunes:Shoes Uncyclopedia:Business (rw) Halloween Kills UnTunes:Perry the Platypus Elon's Musk UnGames:Ultimate Fishing (rw) UnTunes:Rio Herodotus (rw) Brawny Lawnmower-Humvee (rw) Steve Wozniak (rw) Narrative (rw) Bryan Adams High School Alex Trebek Lincoln Logs Brexit Where Is Everybody? UnTunes:Animal (with actual animals) Avi Toledano Eli Roth Film (remake) African American Worst 100 Reflections on 2018 Ray Charles Bernardo Butterlucci Urban Dictionary More recent articles
Article topics Analog Arts Biography Comedy Culinary Film Games Gay Geography History Literature Mario Media Music Politics Pregnancy Religion Science Society Technology Television Theatre Video Games Zoology Most wanted pages | Requested articles | Requested rewrites | Add to stubs

For God-related chat, see #uncyclopedia @ IRCnet. (If you don't have an IRC client, you can use this link.) Just change the nickname to your Uncyclopedia name and the channel to #uncyclopedia.)

Protected by the Fair Use Clause, and Almighty Satan.