Radon

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search
If it's an unregulated radioactive gas, nothing like a good old warning sign to fix the problem!

Radon is a heavy gas on the periodic table of the elements. Extremely inert, heavy, colorless, tasteless, odorless and in every other respect a perfectly respectable element. It's also highly radioactive. Radon is found all around you, making up a percentage of the atmosphere that is so small it seems a waste of time to mention it. It exists particularly around Uranium mines and other poorly ventilated areas such as your mothers basement.

Radon can cause lung cancer and other associated breathing "uh ohs", it is for this reason that proper safety measures have been taken such as gas masks and the world famous caution sign.

Origins[edit]

Radon was discovered many years ago, probably by Marie Curie pertaining to the fact she discovered most of the radioactive elements. It is quite literally everywhere, which is quite concerning owing to the fact it's millions of times more radioactive than weapons grade Uranium. It has been discovered in sandstone, granite and been found to be accumulating in people's basements for the past few centuries.

Radon is derived from bigger atoms like Plutonium and Uranium that adopt a weight loss strategy to become smaller like Radon. The dangerous radon will continue to lose more weight to become much safer products like Lead and Thallium.

Chemistry[edit]

Radon is the type of loser to willfully ignore any sort of attachment, no matter how willing.

Radon, like most of the noble gases doesn't react with anything. So it's chemistry ranges from uninterestingly boring to practically non-existant. No compounds exist for radon, which is actually pretty good for anything attempting to react with it as the intense radiation might actually damage anything reacting with it.

Some unstable and largely hypothetical compounds have been theorized owing to the fact that Fluorine, being the slut of the periodic table will react with anything, no matter how unwilling.

Physics[edit]

Radon is a big heavy nucleus, it is thus prone to radioactive decay. It's half life of 3 days makes it extremely dangerous, as does the fact its in the very atmosphere you breathe until you die. Radon emits alpha particles to become Polonium, a radioactive poison which eventually becomes lead. a poison. In the process of becoming so poisonous, it emits a lot of radiation. This makes radon one of the most dangerous substances on earth, especially when you factor in the fact most of it is derived from Radium, another radioactive poison.

So, if you want my advice, make an atomic filter that filters out all the radon. Or better yet go find your own radon free atmosphere. But seriously, radon isn't all that harmful because if it was none of us would be here right now. In act, historically radon was believed to be healthy to the point "experts" explored the benefits of intentionally breathing it in.

Uses[edit]

Even though it is highly dangerous, extremely radioactive and even more extremely so rare, radon has a number of important uses that you would never have guessed!

One of the uses is in medicine where radon is used to detect, treat and cause cancer. The medical industry is actually world famous for using otherwise seemingly useless radioactive elements to treat various things that you would actually worsen the problem, rather than fix it. But that's progress for you!

The other use is in detection of Uranium ores (apparently Radon gas = Uranium present). The scientists exploit the fact radon cannot easily conceal itself (despite being completely invisible) and use it to mine Uranium to create things that will only benefit the world. So if you thought I was going to provide everyday uses that someone without access to a full nuclear laboratory would find informative, you were clearly mistaken.

1H Hydrogen Hu Homoerectium 1/5Bm Brucium 1/2Ch Cheesium 3/4Pl Plotonium D Deuterium 1.5Py Parodymium 2He Helium
3Li Lithium 4Be Beryllium 5B Boron 6C Carbon 7N Nitrogen 8O Oxygen 9 F Fluorine 10Ne Neon
11Na Sodium 12 Mg Magnesium 13Al Aluminum 14 Si Silicon 15 P Phosphorus 16 S Sulfur 17Cl Chlorine 18 Ar Argon
19 K Potassium 20 Ca Calcium 21 Sc Scandium 22Ti Titanium 23 V Vanadium 24 Cr Chromium 25 Mn Manganese 26Fe Iron 27 Co Cobalt 28Ni Nickel 29Cu Copper 30Zn Zinc 31 Ga Galium 32Ge Germanium 33As Arsenic 34 Se Selenium 35Br Bromine 36Kr Krypton
37 Rb Rubidium 38 Sr Strontium 39 Y Yttrium 40 Zr Zirconium 41 Nb Niobium 42 Mo Molybdenum 43 Tc Technetium 44 Ru Ruthenium 45 Rh Rhodium 46 Pd Palladium 47Ag Silver 48 Cd Cadmium 49In Indium 50Sn Tin 51 Sb Antimony 52 Te Tellurium 53 I Iodine 54Xe Xenon
55 Cs Cesium 56 Ba Barium 57 La Lanthanium 72 Hf Hafnium 73 Ta Tantalum 74 W Tungsten 75 Re Rthenium 76 Os Osmium 77 Ir Iridium 78Pt Platinum 79Au Gold 80Hg Mercury 81 Tl Thallium 82Pb Lead 83Bi Bismuth 84Po Polonium 85 At Astatine 86Rn Radon
87 Fr Francium 88Ra Radium 89 Ac Actinium 104Rf Rutherfordium 105 Db Dubnium 106 Sg Seaborgium 107 Bh Bohrium 108 Hs Hassium 109 Mt Meitnerium 110 Ds Darmstadtium 111Rg Roentgenium 112 Cn Copernicum 113 Nh Nihomium 114 Fl Flerovium 115 Mc Moscovium 116 Lv Livermorium 117 Ts Tennessine 118 Og Oganesson
58 Ce Cerium 59Pr Praseodymium 60 Nd Neodymium 61 Pm Promethium 61 Sm Samarium 63 Eu Europium 64 Gd Gadolinium 65 Tb Terbium 66 Dy Dysprosium 67 Ho Holmium 68 Er Erbium 69 Tm Thulium 70 Yb Ytterbium 71 Lu Lutetium 119Ub Unobtanium 120Un Unununium 121Aw Awesomnium
90 Th Thorium 91 Pa Protactinium 92U Uranium 93 Np Neptunium 94Pu Plutonium 95Am Americium 96 Cm Curium 97 Bk Berkelium 98 Cf Californium 99Es Einsteinium 100 Fm Fermium 101 Md Mendelevium 102 No Nobelium 103 Lr Lawrencium 122Ky Kryptonite 123St Stalinium
 
Alkali Metal
 
Alkaline Earth
 
Transition Metal
 
Basic Metal
 
Semimetal
 
Nonmetal
 
Halogen
 
Noble Gas
 
Lanthanide
 
Unverifide
 
Actinide
 ( v · t · e )