Protactinium
| Protactinium | |||||
| |||||
| Physical Properties | |||||
| Atomic symbol: | Pa | ||||
| Atomic number: | 91 | ||||
| Melting point: | Enough for a nosebleed | ||||
| Boiling point: | More than enough | ||||
| Isotopes: | The one I found | ||||
| Electronegativity: | I just found it how tf am I supposed to know?? | ||||
| Flavor: | I can't even eat it, but I did lick it and it tasted kinda funny... | ||||
| Appearance: | Boring | ||||
“Open up and hand over the damn Protactinium!”
– Federal agent moments before breaking down my door
Protactinium is a weird funny rock that makes me get nosebleeds and makes that funny yellow thing beep. I tried eating it but it was WAY too hard to eat. Every time I tell this to my doctor, she keeps on saying I'm gonna die if I'm around it for another week.
Properties[edit | edit source]
Does it look like I know? However, I think you put it in something that explodes to make a lot of people have nosebleeds. For some reason, the FBI wants all of my protactinium. But Finders Keepers, so I should have it! Fuck you, FBI.
...what's that? This element is named after another one? Well I don't care if it stole the name from a different element; protactinium is automatically the better element.
Scarcity (whatever that means)[edit | edit source]
So I keep on finding it near this weird and overly protected facility in Nevada. There's like a pile or two that just appears every week, and I always yoink it. As far as I can tell, that's the only spot where protactinium can be found. I highly doubt it can be created from a different element like plutonium. Besides, plutonium takes forever to decay and is only used for bombs, not making protactinium!
History (and the Rant DLC)[edit | edit source]
Apparently, I was not the first one to discover this. This is the most surprising fact I've ever been told after my mom told me she was pregnant. So apparently, there was this one guy... think his name was mendelevium... but he predicted the existence of this element. He must be proud of me collecting all of this; I have proven that protactinium is real! I mean, I guess Otto Hahn and Lise Meitner discovered the element too... But that's besides the point! The point is that I got large chunks of the element and a nosebleed, meanwhile those two people got not-even-visible chunks and no nosebleed whatsoever. This automatically proves that I am the true discoverer and father of protactinium. Hooray for me! Time to brag to my friends about this fact before my next nosebleed.
Make sure you memorize these for the test!
| 1H Hydrogen | 2He Helium | ||||||||||||||||
| 3Li Lithium | 4Be Beryllium | 5B Boron | 6C Carbon | 7N Nitrogen | 8O Oxygen | 9F Fluorine | 10Ne Neon | ||||||||||
| 11Na Sodium | 12 Mg Magnesium | 13Al Aluminum | 14 Si Silicon | 15 P Phosphorus | 16 S Sulfur | 17Cl Chlorine | 18Ar Argent | ||||||||||
| 19 K Potassium | 20 Ca Calcium | 21Sc Scandinavium | 22Ti Titanium | 23 V Vanadium | 24Cr Chromium | 25 Mn Manganese | 26Fe Iron | 27 Co Cobalt | 28Ni Nickel | 29 Cu Copper | 30 Zn Zinc | 31 Ga Gallium | 32 Ge Germanium | 33 As Arsenic | 34 Se Selenium | 35 Br Bromine | 36Kr Krypton |
| 37 Rb Rubidium | 38 Sr Strontium | 39 Y Yttrium | 40 Zr Zirconium | 41 Nb Niobium | 42 Mo Molybdenum | 43 Tc Technetium | 44 Ru Ruthenium | 45 Rh Rhodium | 46 Pd Palladium | 47Ag Silver | 48 Cd Cadmium | 49In Indium | 50Sn Tin | 51 Sb Antimony | 99Te Tedium | 53 I Iodine | 54Xe Xenon |
| 55 Cs Caesium | 56 Ba Barium | 57-71 La-Lu Lanthanides | 72 Hf Hafnium | 73 Ta Tantalum | 74 W Tungsten | 75 Re Rhenium | 76 Os Osmium | 77 Ir Iridium | 78Pt Platinum | 79Au Gold | 80Hg Mercury | 81 Tl Thallium | 82Pb Lead | 83Bi Bismuth | 84Po Polonium | 85 At Astatine | 86Rn Radon |
| 87 Fr Francium | 88 Ra Radium | 89-103 Ac-Lr Actinides | 104 Rf Rutherfordium | 105 Db Dubnium | 106 Sg Seaborgium | 107 Bh Bohrium | 108 Hs Hassium | 109 Mt Meitnerium | 110 Ds Darmstadtium | 111 Uuu Unununium | 112 Cn Copernicium | 113 Nh Nihonium | 114 Fl Flerovium | 115 Mc Moscovium | 116 Lv Livermorium | 117 Ts Tennessine | 118 Og Oganesson |
| 119Un Uncyclopedium | 120 Ub Unobtanium | 121 Aeo Awesomnium | 122Fa Fartium | 123St Stalinium | 124Ob Obamium | 125Sl Stalloneium | 126 Ad Adamantium | 127 Vb Vibranium | -1SuStupidium | 1/5Bm Brucium | 1/2*Ch Cheesium | 3/4Pl Plotonium | 4.5Op Opium | ∞Hu Homoerectium | |||
| 57 La Lanthanum | 58 Ce Cerium | 59Pr Praseodymium | 60 Nd Neodymium | 61 Pm Pentium | 62 Sm Samarium | 63 Eu Europium | 64 Gd Gadolinium | 65 Tb Terbium | 66 Dy Dysprosium | 67 Ho Holmium | 68 Er Erbium | 69 Tm Thulium | 70 Yb Ytterbium | 71 Lu Lutetium | |||
| 89 Ac Actinium | 90 Th Thorium | 91 Pa Protactinium | 92U Uranium | 93 Np Neptunium | 94Pu Plutonium | 95 Am Americium | 96 Cm Curium | 97 Bk Berkelium | 98 Cf Californium | 99 Es Einsteinium | 100 Fm Fermium | 101 Md Mendelevium | 102 No Nobelium | 103 Lr Lawrencium |
*Technically an atom of Cheesium has an atomic number of four (4), but that's only for the idiotic table.