User talk:Cajek/Archive31

Uh oh

You may have seen, but this didn't get that good of a review. The reveiwer recommends I say how he found the cure. Staircase CUN^t 16:53, 28 May 2009 (UTC)

Your brother DJ (same adopter) did a good review. Now all you have to do is work on the article. Apparently, you should focus on different aspects of the main character, not go so overboard, and not make the article so self conscious ("Hey look at me, I'm funny!" is what the article does in some parts).   Le Cejak • <16:59 May 28, 2009>

Will do. Staircase CUN^t 17:00, 28 May 2009 (UTC)

DJ recommended that I scratch the part at the end about killig the cancer patients, But I don't know what else to put there. Help? Staircase CUN^t 17:20, 28 May 2009 (UTC)

Also, I added how he "discovered" the cure, but I feel as though it is really bad. What do you think? Staircase CUN^t 17:49, 28 May 2009 (UTC)

Yeah, it's more of that article-winking-at-the-reader stuff. Try being more realistic, it might be funnier.   Le Cejak • <17:52 May 28, 2009>

I'll try. Do you think I could have the compounds as letters, Like D , M, and G (for death, murder, etc) instead? If so, I was also planning on saying how coumpounds C, R, and A (For cure, remedy, etc.) didn't work. Staircase CUN^t 17:54, 28 May 2009 (UTC)

It's hard to say how to make a funny discovery of cancer... Maybe he found the cure while doing other things?   Le Cejak • <18:05 May 28, 2009>

Perhaps.... maybe when he was trying to make dinner or something? Staircase CUN^t 18:13, 28 May 2009 (UTC)

I finished up the article. Also, Tags and I are probably going to start a collabortion based off of the idea in the article AAS. And apart from that, I'm working on a new article, User:Staircase/Milky Way. I haven't saved my progress yet, So you will have to look later on. Staircase CUN^t 00:27, 29 May 2009 (UTC)

Good job. Most of your time here will be figuring out where to get ideas from and writing them. In the meantime, ask DJ for a re-review. Remember, don't be too realistic but stay close to what people would actually do in the situations you write about... it's hard to explain... Good job!   Le Cejak • <0:30 May 29, 2009>

Thanks for the words of wisdom. I get what you are saying. I'll throw it up for review again, and then I'll go off for a while. Dinner's calling. Staircase CUN^t 00:49, 29 May 2009 (UTC)

Have you seen my Milky Way article yet? WOuld you go read it and give me your thoughts, please? Staircase CUN^t 20:34, 29 May 2009 (UTC)

I'm not quite sure of where you wanted this delivered so...

The Uncyclopedia UnSignpost

Now with 20% more ninjas!

May 28th, 2009 • Issue 49 • The kind of news your momma warned you about

Going Portal by UU Under conditions of great secrecy, a select group of talented volunteers has been slaving away at the wiki-coalface, dedicating themselves to the selfless task of bringing Uncyclopedia a dedicated selection of portal pages. And now their tireless efforts are starting to bear fruit, with the first few being linked on the Main Page by noted twirly star of David, Mordillo. He proudly flagged them up as "new!", until Bradaphraser, more accurately understanding the IQ of the average Uncyclopedian, flagged then as "newd!" instead. What, some of you may ask, are portal pages? Well, rather than have us explain it laboriously for you (because that sounds like, you know, effort), why not take a look at the following highly sexy portals: Politics; Games; Science; History and Art. And with more to come including the intriguing concept of a Quaint portal from Cajek, one thing's for sure: there has recently been an increase in the number of portals on Uncyclopedia. What? Nile and Nile related articles invade Uncyclopedia! by Docile hippopotamus Actually, Nile and Nile related articles are not invading Uncyclopedia - we merely wanted to say that to see if you, the reader, were gullible enough to believe it. And you were. More like, "Nile and Nile related articles invade Uncyclopedia hoax!" Let's find out what Sir Edward Mahm00shA, professor of Egyptian history and archaeology at Oxford university exclusively had to say about this: "It is a lie. And Ra saw it was no good. And the band is with me. And they hath uttered not a word about invading Uncyclopedia. Verily! Ra hacketh off the phallus of he who lieth". See now? Undeniable proof from Sir Edward Mahm00shA that the band is chilling with him and have not even mentioned invading Uncyclopedia. We also asked the wealthy Egyptian and Babylonian antique collector Mr. Great Lung Sphincter of Nebuchadnezzar the 1st to comment and he exclusively replied: "Nile doesn't have any power. Now the Tigris-Euphrates, that's a different story". Not only does this tell us that the Tigris-Euphrates conspiracy theorists are cooler than Nile conspiracists, but that Nile could not invade Uncyclopedia even if they wanted to, and you should be afraid of the Tigris-Euphrates conspiracy theorists - very afraid. To sum it up, there is no Nile and Nile related articles invasion of Uncyclopedia, just as there is no cabal.

Check out these pages! A true Uncyc legend returns! Promise to make a vote, the whole vote and nothing but the vote Big audio dynamite From our logs: 19:47, 25 May 2009 Roman Dog Bird (Talk | contribs) blocked 88.208.208.132 (Talk) with an expiry time of Judgement Day ‎ (Yep, you're really trying, I see. Great, keep the laughs coming, Mr. Funny Man.) 09:37, 25 May 2009 Mordillo (Talk | contribs) blocked 209.146.77.35 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 week ‎ (You meant "make love to me, she dog") 20:43, 24 May 2009 TheLedBalloon (Talk | contribs) blocked 41.154.2.5 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 week ‎ (Vandalizing articles, smearing dog shit all over Todd Lyons's car, etc.) 10:48, 23 May 2009 Under user (Talk | contribs) blocked 210.211.138.192 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 day ‎ (don't blank, I'm running out of insulting ban reasons.) Biopic of the Week Todd Lyons has been on Uncyclopedia forever. No, seriously, he started editing in 2005 - and he's still here! He cut his article writing teeth on Dwight Schultz, and went on to write a further 98 of the buggers, while nailing his first feature with Fecal E.Coli, which started a run of 18.5 front page appearances up to the recent Kinsey Report No. 3: Sexual Behavior in Hamsters. He's been an admin longer than most of our readership have been users. Put together. And he still has all his own teeth, he tells us! Blatant Filler of the Week This box here, which is blatant padding so the formatting of this issue looks about right. Cajek ban of the Week 22:16, 26 May 2009 Mhaille (Talk | contribs) blocked Cajek (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 2 hours ‎ (Unacceptable username: ...too few recent bans for my liking....)

UnSignpost Main Page • Contact the Editors • Sign Up for Delivery • Get the Userbox

The only newspaper to be delivered by MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 19:38, 28 May 2009 (UTC)

Quaint

You wanted advice on Quaint? I'm not all that sure you need any, but post the link on my talk page and I'll see if I get any ideas. -- Style  Guide 08:09, 29 May 2009 (UTC)

All I can say on this matter is that this article is the very dictionary definition of quaint, sir. The very definition! (I write my own dictionary, I find it avoids all sorts of complications - you should see the entry for "theodolite"). --UU - natter 09:53, May 29

I wiggle my own mictionary too, and it has a far better blosmaplation on "thgrbluptr" than yours has. So there! -- Style  Guide 10:02, 29 May 2009 (UTC)

Yeah, of course I'm in charge of the weirdest, vaguest portal. I'll do stuff on it later. My dictionary is the bible, people: I'm a born-again whateveritis.   Le Cejak • <14:30 May 29, 2009>

You mean Whateveritist, surely? -- Style  Guide 13:57, 31 May 2009 (UTC)

A mid-morning snack

Felicitous greetings, good sir! I convey to you a Friday greeting by means of this here hot, toasted, buttered crumpet. As the butter oozes luxuriously from the holes at every indulgent mouthful, I urge you to treasure this moment - such pleasures are normally denied to Americans, as we're not sure they possess the necessary dignified restraint appropriate to adequate enjoyment of said treat. And now, I must away to other matters. Good day to you! --UU - natter 09:53, May 29

I saw that Gordon Ramsey guy on BBC. Did you know that he's angry and cusses a lot? Anyway, in America we have real food, not this stuff (eats it anyway). I would rather eat a thousand English muffins than go back to being a colony of your little island thing! Oh, pip pip oim frum England and all that rot   Le Cejak • <14:30 May 29, 2009>

Maybe a two hour ban to consider your objections to returning to her Imperial Majesty's rule might help you to see things more clearly? Toodlepip, sir. -- Sir Mhaille  (talk to me)

Oh, oh, look at this: another Englishman trying to tax me without representation or whatever! Mhaille thinks he's so big, you know that? Just because he has an English accent?! I would rather eat TWO THOUSAND English muffins than return to British rule!   Le Cejak • <14:40 May 29, 2009>

I'm fond of a posh English muffin myself...--Sycamore (Talk) 14:41, 29 May 2009 (UTC)

Then suddenly! The Spanish Inquisition!!! That's right bitch. Now, ¿dónde está mi pene? MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 14:43, 29 May 2009 (UTC)

So

How long are you gonna stay this time before you dissapear without warning? I've got my money on 2 months. Saberwolf116 15:36, 29 May 2009 (UTC)

Longer than me I bet. Cause two and half is how long I'm staying. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 15:37, 29 May 2009 (UTC)

My UnNews

Did you like it? Staircase CUN^t 01:41, 30 May 2009 (UTC)

Actually not bad, Stairsy. One day when you're ready encyclopedic articles might grow out of this writing style you've got. Again, you could put it up on Pee Review.   Le Cejak • <1:45 May 30, 2009>

Well, I do already have two articles on the review list. so when one of them gets a review, I'll throw this one up. But which do you think is better, this or the cancer one? Staircase CUN^t 01:52, 30 May 2009 (UTC)

Which one do you like better, Stairs? Follow up question: why?   Le Cejak • <1:58 May 30, 2009>

Personally, I prefer the one I just wrote. I like it because I think it is prett good, and I did all of the writing. For the other one, you contributed are large portion of the laughs in the article, so I don't have the proud feeling when I read that article. Staircase CUN^t 02:19, 30 May 2009 (UTC)

That's good, that's good. Well, what I would suggest is reading the article aloud to yourself to see if the jokes would work if someone else was reading them. I might ask which jokes of the articles made you laugh the most?   Le Cejak • <2:41 May 30, 2009>

Personally, I feel sort of greedy saying this but, I liked in the cancer one where I had the line where he said you could use the money for reasearch or you could spend it on beer, drugs, and prostitutes. Other than that, though, I feel that the next to last paragraph was the best, and you wrote all of that. Staircase CUN^t 02:46, 30 May 2009 (UTC)

Say, what exactly is that Pee page you have? Staircase CUN^t 19:45, 30 May 2009 (UTC)

Problem

Mr. Zim ulator has made a drastic change to my UnNews, and every time I change it back, he changes it back to his edit. I do not like it the way he has it, but he thinks it is way better his way and "flows easier". However, I do not agree, I think it gets confusing, and stupid, at the end. Staircase CUN^t 03:09, 31 May 2009 (UTC)

Zimulator is senior to you, Stairs. I agree with his edits, just give them a chance. Be patient and take another look.   Le Cejak • <5:57 May 31, 2009>

I've read it time and time again, it just doesn't do it for me. Staircase CUN^t 05:59, 31 May 2009 (UTC)

Well, this is a wiki. Zim knows how to do UnNewses. Why don't you ask him about the changes (nicely)?   Le Cejak • <6:02 May 31, 2009>

This is my two cents...by the way, this is probably the first time I have talked on Cajek's talk page...HI CAJEK! Anyhow, admins are mean, smelly, perverted veterans of this site just out to get you right? They think their way is best and no one else's matters. Obviously, this is a bit of an exaggeration, but even so, what can you do about it? It might suck that they are taking control of your work, but forget about it and move on! Don't get caught up in all sorts of trouble around here, even if you never intended to get in it in the first place. Just bend over to the infinite power of the mighty banstick.    Tagstit    talk    contribs    awards   06:06, 31 May 2009 (UTC)

Hey Tags, no, Uncyc is not a fascism. You can debate about it, and you can make changes to what Zim did so long as it's not a revert. Tags, let me repeat, the admins can be talked to. Sorry if I'm not funny right now, I'm tired.   Le Cejak • <6:08 May 31, 2009>

Well, then. So much for getting it reviewed. *sigh* Staircase CUN^t 06:11, 31 May 2009 (UTC)

Oh no! By all means I think you should discuss it, but when it gets to the point of arguing, as in the case of Cheddar and his infamous whoring, I think it is better to just say yes and okay to their commands and suggestions. Especially for users that are very very new.    Tagstit    talk    contribs    awards   06:12, 31 May 2009 (UTC)

If you look on my talk page you might agree that it is arguing. Staircase CUN^t 06:14, 31 May 2009 (UTC)

Usually, new users don't run into problems with admins... uh, well, I did, but still, you can talk to admins! Just don't do things that would be annoying, like edit wars. Zim and Stairs both have rights to that article, now, and they need to act like co-writers.   Le Cejak • <6:15 May 31, 2009>

Ya, I am all for discussing. I guess I am just sort of a bitch when it comes to superiors telling me what to do. I am pretty flexible towards whatever they have to say. And the Cheddar thing got way out of hand mostly because he argued so much and I feel alot of respect was lost. Don't want that for Stairs here.    Tagstit    talk    contribs    awards   06:17, 31 May 2009 (UTC)

When you get your own adoptees, expect this crap... every single time. THIS DISCUSSION HAS MOVED TO STAIRCASE'S TALK PAGE, PLEASE!!!   Le Cejak • <6:21 May 31, 2009>

NoCajek

Cajek! Hey Cajek! Hi! What's up! What are you doing! Mind if I join you? Would you mind giving Wikipedia a good peeing on for us? It's nice to see you back dude.-OptyC Sucks! CUN18:54, 30 May

So

Here's your pen back, Zana   Le Cejak • <15:34 Jun 01, 2009>

You don't hate me. We finally cool or what? ~Formerly Annoying Crap 06:16, 1 June 2009

ha! I thought YOU hated ME, actually   Le Cejak • <6:19 Jun 01, 2009>

No, why would I ask you to come back if I hated you? I'm actually a secret admirer of yours. At any rate, you're damn funny! Do you ever IRC? I have questions for you. ~Formerly Annoying Crap 06:36, 1 June 2009

Well, thank you! Go ahead and ask your questions here, unless they're of the sexy nature, then ask them in a forum for everyone to see.   Le Cejak • <14:47 Jun 01, 2009>

I really have too many to ask here... and as for the forum talk I have a suspicion that you're either totally ugly, hot and not interested, taken, or gay. But I digress:

How old are you? Is Cajek your real name, or what, pray tell, does it mean? Can you elaborate when you say cringe, because I was thinking of recording GILF. Need any poto-chops? I sporked your unicorn template for my talk page, do you mind? Why did you have Artistic Chemistry deleted? Do you prefer boxers or briefs? What are your thoughts on this, I need some ideas to expand/make funnier. And one more thing, can I have your autograph on my left breast please? Here's a sharpie. ~Formerly Annoying Crap 15:20, 1 June 2009

Here we go: (1) mid-20s, (2) My initials are CJK and I'm lazy, (3) the audio was better than anything I could do, but I don't know why... it made me feel funny? (4) do you want to design a new sig for me? Maybe a novel cover for my unbook that's on VFH? That would be fucking awesome (5) Which unicorn template and no I don't mind, (6) nobody seemed to like it, but if you want you could convince one of the admins to hack it up for you to play around with, (7) briefs: they keep everything "in order", (8) Frieda Kahlo! That's awesome and hilarious, actually (9) I'll have one MSPainted up for you in a jiff! Think about #4, especially, Zana.   Le Cejak • <15:27 Jun 01, 2009>

Well, I thought about it so hard it materialized on the computer screen right before my eyes! What do you think, kind of looks like you, huh? Anyways, for your sig... what did you have in mind? ~Formerly Annoying Crap 17:38, 1 June 2009

First off, that picture is awesome! My sister is getting her graduate degree in digital arts, so I'm continually amazed by potatochop and the artists who can use it. It's so good, I don't care if it ever gets featured. As for my sig, I'm very tired of it. Look at it! It's a light blue button that I designed in 2007: It's very, very ancient. I don't want to put all the pressure on you, so I'll just say I want it to have blue incorporated in it somewhere, if you're up for it. I notice you worked on lots of other people's sigs, so I figured you wouldn't want to pass up the opportunity to remake Uncyc's most famous sig (I think it is).   Le Cejak • <17:42 Jun 01, 2009>

Any special links you want me to add? ~Formerly Annoying Crap 18:07, 1 June 2009

Um, just to my userpage. I guess it'll be hard to make it interesting, huh?   Le Cejak • <18:23 Jun 01, 2009>

I'll see what I can do. ~Formerly Annoying Crap 05:02, 2 June 2009

What do you think of something like this: ? ~Formerly Annoying Crap 21:56, 2 June 2009

I like it! Obviously, when you make the official one, it can't have the little time sig thing. Also, how will I link to my userpage?   Le Cejak • <23:27 Jun 02, 2009>

weirdos coming to my talk page interrupting everything

Just so you know, I do hate the both of you... MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 17:47, 1 June 2009 (UTC)

Just so you know, I do love the both of you... —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 17:47, 1 June 2009 (UTC)

Why, I nevah! By the great verucca sock of whoever!   Le Cejak • <17:51 Jun 01, 2009>

I ain't no fucking weirdo! —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 18:00, 1 June 2009 (UTC)

Neither am I, although I do fuck weirdos. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 18:02, 1 June 2009 (UTC)

Hurray! A Weirdo 18:04, 1 June 2009 (UTC)

Staircase

Is User:CheddarBBQ Staircases' sockpuppet? Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 23:06, 1 June 2009 (UTC)

Ah, no, they're both on IRC right now!! COME IN! HURRY!   Le Cejak • <23:08 Jun 01, 2009>

I can't be bothered. Talking with a 10 year old on IRC is more than I can handle just now. I've been out at the woodpile stocking up on bans in case I need them. I'm hoping he's learned a lesson from our comments and a short ban. Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 23:12, 1 June 2009 (UTC)

"Sorry guys" "sorree" "I thought he would say I was the dick" -direct quotes   Le Cejak • <23:13 Jun 01, 2009>

Good, I hope he is. I'm glad you saw him for what he was in the end. Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 23:18, 1 June 2009 (UTC)

Zim, I'm his adopter, I have to give him the benefit of the doubt.   Le Cejak • <23:29 Jun 01, 2009>

People will only learn by example. Well, sometimes they do. Mostly they just act like asshats. -- Sir Mhaille  (talk to me)

Well, my adoptee is following in my footsteps.   Le Cejak • <0:00 Jun 02, 2009>

The circle is now complete. When they left you they were but learners. Now THEY are the masters! -- Sir Mhaille  (talk to me)

Am I going to have to have a duel with someone? I'm pretty lazy.   Le Cejak • <0:10 Jun 02, 2009>

More sockpuppet shit? What? Don Puttano cHeDDs 16:44,2June,2009

That sockpuppet stuff was the other Cajek.   Le Cejak • <16:48 Jun 02, 2009>

TEST. (Just checking if the new Cejak is gonna revert me for being a sockpuppet :) Here we go) Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 22:03 June 2 '09

Whats wrong with you?

Why do you keep reverting me? Do you have something against me or what? Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 01:37 June 2 '09

Are you a sockpuppet? A vandal? What's your fucking angle?   Le Cejak • <1:39 Jun 02, 2009>

Cake J is trying to stop you being infi-banned? Also: did you know that you can prevent Cajek editing any page on this wiki by adding "__NOCAJEK__" at the top of the page? Quite a handy piece of code if you want to get booted out of here. (Take some deep breaths!) IronLung 01:43, 2 June 2009 (UTC)

Again, whats wrong with you? Why are you so angry? Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 01:45 June 2 '09

Sorry, dude Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 09:57 June 2 '09

Cajek, the fact that you decided that he's a sockpuppet, still does not give you the right to revert indiscriminately. Cut it out please. ~ 11:10, 2 June 2009 (UTC)

So, he decided that Im a sockpuppet?! Wow! What's his proof? Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 11:34 June 2 '09

No no, there will be NO DRAMA here. I am having a conversation with Cajek, and I don't need any support from anyone on this, thanks. ~ 12:20, 2 June 2009 (UTC)

You don't want no drama, no, no drama, no, no, no, no drama..... -- Sir Mhaille  (talk to me)

Alright guys, sorry   Le Cejak • <14:45 Jun 02, 2009>

Conan "The Who"

That reference to The Who on Conan's page is a reference to the fact that Conan lost his virginity listening to The Who, according to the Imdb. --Padddy5 09:10, 2 June 2009 (UTC)

Hey paddy, it's still too random. I didn't mean to come off as a jerk, but nobody's going to get that.   Le Cejak • <15:13 Jun 02, 2009>

This

Please, no insults. You dont know me, and insulting someone you dont know isnt a smart move. Plus, I dont want to make enemies here. Ok? Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 06:40 June 3 '09

Fine, sorry.   Le Cejak • <6:41 Jun 03, 2009>

Fine. I think we should turn the page now. There.. Oh, hi Cajek, I'm Mahm00shA :) Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 06:47 June 3 '09

Hi Mahmo, I'm Cajek.   Le Cejak • <7:01 Jun 03, 2009>

Now, about my edits you reverted at staircase's dramathon, I know they were irritating to you, especially when you were trying to teach steps not to fuck with admins. I, hereby, apologise to you.

SORRY, CAJEK!

Now, will you vote for my unscript on vfh? :) Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 07:10 June 3 '09

Didn't that already get featured? The thing with Mordillo?   Le Cejak • <15:35 Jun 03, 2009>

YesTimeToCajek

Hi Cajek! Thanks for Cajeking my article. I'll have you know, sonny Jim, that I didn't actually write the article. Instead, I bought it off some poor Mexican kid for a nickel. I tried to be faithful to the original, which is why you see some bolded words, but I'll remove them if you think they're too odd. I'll try to iron out the complaints that you had, but was there anything particular about the prose that seemed awkward, maybe something that only a non-native English speaker or a crap translator would say? --Pleb SYNDROME _{CUN medicate (butt poop!!!!)} 18:34, 3 June 2009 (UTC)

Hey Syndrome! I don't remember any awkward lines, and I don't see any now. In fact, I gave you an 8 for prose and formatting, remember? Yeah, some randomly bolded words, but your article is looking fine. I don't really have a whole lot of advice to give you on how to make it hilarious, but you (or babblefish or google) translated it very well. Have fun!   Le Cejak • <18:41 Jun 03, 2009>

Ha. You wish automatic translators were that good. Otherwise I would have called the article "to do further" or "another to do so". Anyway, I just asked because I thought you might be holding back on a "quick" review, and because, need I remind you, 8 is just a notch above average. Well, thanks again for the review. I'll get around to fixing stuff you mentioned eventually. --Pleb SYNDROME _{CUN medicate (butt poop!!!!)} 04:06, 5 June 2009 (UTC)

Ceci N'est Pas Une Request

Hi there! A while back, you nominated my article for VFH. Now, her Britannic Majesties request that you continue your support of PBS my article by voting it one of May's top 10. Again, thanks for the original nomination and I hope I will get your vote!--You know what the music means... Our time is up. 22:54, 3 June 2009 (UTC)

Thbpbbthbptbpth

Cajek smells! Nyah nyah nyah! /runs around in circles AAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!! <serious>Thanks for nomming my article</serious> Now be smited! AH-HAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA... I really don't know what I'm doing. Thbpbthbp... and I.... DON'T CARE!!! AHAHHAHAHAAA!!! • • • Necropaxx (T) {~} 03:10, Jun 4

A portrait of the epitome of an uncyc editor! :)   Le Cejak • <3:55 Jun 04, 2009>

CoCo

That randomness wasn't originally by me, but I couldn't find it in my heart to delete it. Damn you human compassion. – Preceding unsigned comment added by Padddy5 (talk • contribs)

Oh, well, I deleted it FOR you! :\ Well, it was random anyway.   Le Cejak • <15:12 Jun 04, 2009>

Thankies!

"Feeling any pain yet, Mrs. Davis?" Necropaxx is delighted to thank you for your For vote on his recent rewrite, Antbortion. Remember, kids, this is what happened to your would-be brother Jeffy. Go kick your parents for him, why don't you?

Thanks again for nommin' it! • • • Necropaxx (T) {~} 15:15, Jun 4

UnSignpost June 4th, 2009

The Uncyclopedia UnSignpost

I love it when the news comes together

June 4th, 2009 • Issue 50 • I love the smell of news in the morning!

Todd not Lionised by all? By UU Uncyclopedia's long-cherished status as the worst was given a massive fillip this week with the discovery that genial admin Todd Lyons has his own Facebook hate group. This considerable accomplishment has to be considered among the highest praise ever bestowed on an admin of this wiki. Kosher kvetcher Mordillo even opined that it makes him the #1 admin on the wiki, as "even Mhaille doesn't have a hate group!" Lyons himself was deeply touched by the tribute, exclusively telling the USP: "I'm a bit surprised (though not touched, like the WotM nomination this month), because I generally shy away from the snappy/nasty ban summaries that would guarantee me a spot in the UnSignpost. Really, RDB is my #1 pick for this, and richly deserves to have a hate group on Facebook (if not several dozen by now). :) Second, if I had any insecurities that I'd lost my touch with the ban hammer after being on hiatus, they're gone. The arm's feeling great. The surgery seems to have been a 100% success. I'm feeling good that I'll be able to finish out the season and hopefully garner some interest as a bureaucrat when I become a free agent this fall." The group's creator was unavailable for comment, probably due to being banned. Comings and Goings By Gerrycheevers As you may or may not have noticed, there recently seems to be a flurry of returns and hiatuses (hiati?) on this silly wiki that some of us like to call Uncyclopedia. This could be due to a number of things: the end of the school year and thus the end of studying and finals; the summer season causing new and strange emotions in internet comedy writers; the revolving door recently installed at the Uncyclopedia headquarters. Regardless of the reason, those returning have been 'welcomed', and those leaving have been warned that their userpages will be mercilessly vandalized should their vacation extend overly long. Popular aquatic creature user Finnius claims to have returned. His contributions since returning have thus far been limited to announcing his return in the forum (as required by Uncyclopedia Bylaw #435), but the Unsignpost is confident of a return laced with quality pee and other, less pungent useful contributions. The elusive Cajek, a mythical creature once thought to exist only in the surreal dreams of squirrels, has returned gloriously upon the back of a giant squirrel. So at least some part of the myth was true. Take that, science! Other returns include Dexter111344 after a brief hiatus and Gouncyclopedia!, who evaded a years-long block to announce his return in the forums (UB435 again). Perhaps the most noted of all, faithful new dog Dognewspaper returns from a one-month hiatus to appear in this story. Other users have seen a decline or all-out drop-off in their contribution level. SysRq remains on an indefinite hiatus. Gerrycheevers has seen his number of edits dwindle as of late. MrN9000 is still among the missing. Codeine is apparently gone as well, and Necropaxx will be losing his precious internet. We bid these users to hurry back, lest their userpages and works be smited with the hammer of pointless vandalism.

Check out these pages! Image spam Another one bites the dust Admin competence? From our logs: 01:08, 3 June 2009 TheLedBalloon (Talk | contribs) blocked 24.8.59.236 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 week ‎ (So far you've edited the pages 'your mom' and 'school'. Want me to try and guess your age?) 07:46, 2 June 2009 Mordillo (Talk | contribs) blocked 203.17.189.150 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 week ‎ (bored fuckes should go fuck boards. It's too early in the morning and I can't think of anything smart to say) 20:04, 30 May 2009 Under user (Talk | contribs) blocked 174.117.160.23 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 day ‎ (Cyberbullying: we don't want to hear about people you know and why you want to suck their dick. I know that's not quite what you said, but something about what you said implied it) 20:38, 29 May 2009 Roman Dog Bird (Talk | contribs) blocked Da Wizard Of Oz (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of Judgement Day ‎ (PLEASE MASSUH WHIP ME, OH MAH GOD, I'M GETTIN' SO HOT, I'LL SUCK YO DICK!!!!!!) Biopic of the Week The very Reverend Zim ulator is the undisputed, acknowledged, and slightly puce master of UnNews. As such, reporting about him in a newspaper may be an act of such metaphysical self-referentialism that it creates a negative feedback loop, destroying the universe, or at least this wiki. But, in the name of bringing Zim's name to our readership, that's a risk we're willing to take. We'd normally link to a bunch of stuff he's done at this point, but just take a look at UnNews - as we mentioned, he's basically the guy who keeps it all tickin'. Rats off to ya, Zim! Old School Featured Article of the Week In a week when Obama is trying to reach out to the Muslim community, perhaps it is an apt time to consider how far he is going to have to reach. Will he ever be able to bridge the gap all the way to the readership of American Fundie Magazine? "The magazine for "True Christians™", was formed to cater to the needs of the modern biblical fundamentalist", and is just as relevant today as it was way back in 2006. VFD kept article of the week Plan 11 from Outer Space has been referred to as "amusing", "pretty funny" and "hilarious". Go see why people thought it worth having around.

UnSignpost Main Page • Contact the Editors • Sign Up for Delivery • Get the Userbox

Delievered by Saberwolf116 00:18, 5 June 2009 (UTC). Sorry if I put it in the wrong place.

Hey, I installed that button ya ask fer.

That'll be $21. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 04:29, 5 June 2009 (UTC)

What button?   Le Cejak • <4:42 Jun 05, 2009>

Oh, uh, I see!   Le Cejak • <4:44 Jun 05, 2009>

Hey

You may have seen that this didn't get too snuff of a review. And apart from that, he didn't really offer any advice, so I don't know what to do here. Staircase CUN^t 06:44, 3 June 2009 (UTC)

Weeelll, I basically agree with his scores, his explanations are adequate, and he does give some direction. Why don't you ask him directly what concepts he wants filled out? Pee reviews are hard to do well.   Le Cejak • <7:00 Jun 03, 2009>

Ok. I'll give him a good talk to see what needs to be done. What would you say if I was wearing a gas mask right now? Staircase CUN^t 07:03, 3 June 2009 (UTC)

My initial reaction is "Gas masks are cool and necessary!" Then I'm thinking that you live in a militia camp in the depths of Montana, and you just finished a training exercise.   Le Cejak • <15:35 Jun 03, 2009>

How'd you kno-- Uh,I mean, er... I'm not doing that.... Also, do you think that the UnNews is perhaps featureable material? LongLiverh3 recommends that we get a new pic, but I'm not that sure we need one. Staircase CUN^t 22:08, 3 June 2009 (UTC)

Cajek, I know you're there. You're making edits. Staircase CUN^t 01:25, 4 June 2009 (UTC)

Whoops! sorry adoptee! Hold on, let me check it out... I'll leave my response on it's talk page.   Le Cejak • <1:27 Jun 04, 2009>

Deal. I didn't make many edits, though, mainly because I didn't have to. Staircase CUN^t 01:28, 4 June 2009 (UTC)

OK. I made your edits. I don't feel bad, though, most of the things you pointed out were from Romartus's edits. Some were from mine, but not a lot. Thanks for the help! Staircase CUN^t 04:43, 4 June 2009 (UTC)

Hey, Cajek! Up here! Do you think the article is ready, or even better, VFH worthy? Staircase CUN^t 04:54, 5 June 2009 (UTC)

Do you want me to do another review like the last one?   Le Cejak • <4:57 Jun 05, 2009>

Ok, anything that helps. I sorta think this has a good shot at feature, and I would definitely like to get one of those under my pants belt. Staircase CUN^t 05:02, 5 June 2009 (UTC)

I hope you read the reasoning behind my suggestions, steps. You do, right? It's okay to disagree with them, too, obviously.   Le Cejak • <5:39 Jun 05, 2009>

I don't disagree, but I found it funny that you had so many different notes this time. Staircase CUN^t 05:42, 5 June 2009 (UTC)

Don't be discouraged! They were mostly technical suggestions. Stuff about tone and coherence, little stuff. However, I can nitpick about anything. My job when school was in was to be a proofreader for essays.   Le Cejak • <5:46 Jun 05, 2009>

Well, I made your edits, but the part at the end where I mades ome of your changes still seems iffy to me. I didn't really know how else to put it. Staircase CUN^t 05:57, 5 June 2009 (UTC)

I don't know exactly what you mean. Is the last part giving you trouble? But did you understand my suggestions?   Le Cejak • <6:01 Jun 05, 2009>

Oh, wait, yeah. The ending doesn't work. It's better than it was, though. Do you agree?   Le Cejak • <6:04 Jun 05, 2009>

Ya, it is better, but the part where I said "he responded:" sort of made me cringe even though I wrote it. Maybe you could go in there and make that change, if it's not too much. Staircase CUN^t 06:06, 5 June 2009 (UTC)

Alright. Pee Review time? Staircase CUN^t 06:24, 5 June 2009 (UTC)

Sure. It'll be hard to find any more technical mistakes. Expect a high prose & formatting score! Wooo!   Le Cejak • <6:27 Jun 05, 2009>

Alright. That means higher overall score, with a higher misc. score if they use the pee template! 06:32, 5 June 2009 (UTC)

YEAH! HIGH FIVE! LET'S GET ALIVE WITH PROSE AND FORMATTING! :)   Le Cejak • <6:34 Jun 05, 2009>

Ya ya. Totally. Too bad they huffed that Doctor guy's page, that was fun with the title conversation. Staircase CUN^t 06:37, 5 June 2009 (UTC)

The IP Address from April

Hello Cajek. I am THE IP ADDRESS FROM APRIL. I have come here to vandalize your userpage. Unfortunately, it's protected, so this is the next best thing. I would like to tell you how the Mormons have influenced my life, but I can't. Never been to Utah. This IP address is from Schaumburg, IL. Yes, yes, the black helicopters are on their way. Good. I'm bored at this office. If only I had your SSN. I'd make sure you never have any kind of insurance again. Failing that, I'd sell it to some illegals. Feel free to make this an Uncyclopedia in-joke. Go eat shit fuckers has gone stale. Signed The Mormon IP address from April 65.90.138.150 16:46, 5 June 2009 (UTC)

You mean the original author of Antbortion? The person who got it featured, Necropaxx is a mormon. Also, it's kinda hard to vandalize a talk page. Remember, every time an uncyclopedian talks, it's considered vandalism in 49 states and 3 territories.   Le Cejak • <16:50 Jun 05, 2009>

Cheers & Sorry

Cheers for the Pee Review, and sorry for the article. You know, it was something I had almost forgotten I had put up there. And I actually completely agree with you. After reading the article again, I thought "This is actually crap!" It was an idea I'd had before I found this site, and well, it wasn't really much of an idea. I may possibly have been drunk or incapacitated when I wrote it. So, now I am very happy for it to be deleted or someone to stick a rewrite tag on it. Anyway, we'll forget about that crap, and move on. So. What are you writing/doing at the moment?=) Nameable ((mumble)) 17:21, 5 June 2009 (UTC)

Haha...drunk.

It's a shame that I cannot get you or Mr. Mormon back. Not to mention, this guy jumped in front of me while i was typing. I was hoping to get your email address. I want to sign you up for beast porn. It's lke furry, but less anime. And which state is it not considered vandalism? Have you ever pictured your boss as a zombie? I do, and then I daydream about shooting them in the head. Deranged Ip Address from April 65.90.138.150 17:28, 5 June 2009 (UTC)

Oh. Nice to know. . . I really don't get it. Nameable ((mumble)) 17:46, 5 June 2009 (UTC)

Oh, don't mind him... that's an IP vandal that's haunting me :\ Anyway, I'm sorry nameable! You're an awesome writer. I'm working on User:Cajek/HS right now. I wrote HowTo:Live with UC recently. What are you up to?   Le Cejak • <17:54 Jun 05, 2009>

i'm not a vandal. the term is concerned author

Sorry Nameable, my comment got piggybacked onto yours to give it more merit. No one listens to an unregistered user, even if i do have an account that i wish to keep hidden. No one knows that i am secretly the author of fisher price, just using a new IP. JK LOLZ 65.90.138.150 17:58, 5 June 2009 (UTC)

I'm gonna ignore the comment from Mr. IP...Sooo, to Cajek, currently I am trying this which is in the style of one of Orian's articles, and also trying to do a How To (this) which is currently in epic fail mode. Ooh, and if I get another feature (somehow) I can go on your list! Yay! Nameable ((mumble)) 08:37, 6 June 2009 (UTC)

Since you brought it up

I was passing on my way to somewhere else, and had a thought - so I dug up this, which is the review you rightly marked as the blemish on my record on the list. Just thought I'd lay that one to rest. Now, I'm off again - please pretend I made some kind of suave and enigmatic comment as I left. --UU - natter 13:53, Jun 6

Ooh look, a template has appeared!

CHEERS!
 Why, thank you for voting for my recently featured article. It's nice to know that you also enjoy laughing at gullible people getting their comeuppance. You're obviously as funny in the head as me!
(Not that you're funny in the head or anything.
Well, you are a bit. But in a good way, I promise!)
Nameable 16:12, 27 May 2009 (UTC)

Nameable ((mumble)) 20:00, 6 June 2009 (UTC)

One for your faves

This is from an old Pee Review.

“Tom Cruise and Mario jumped onto Battle Cat's back, put her in second gear, and flew to Sweden, where they ate toast made of the number seven.”

~ Hyperbole on An example of Random Humor

I know it goes against HTBFANJS, but I can't stop laughing at it. Saberwolf116 02:19, 7 June 2009 (UTC)

Thankee

A couplet from Billy the Kid: Your vote's put another notch on my gun, Historical revisionism has never been such fun.

Thanks for your vote and Pee Review! IronLung 02:15, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

Cejak

What's up, mate? I'm quite bored around here lately. Do you have any ideas of what to do? Staircase CUN^t 03:07, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

Duty

Thanks for the review, though seeing as you're familiar with neither Joyce nor CoD4, I feel you missed out on a great deal. I'm seeking a second opinion before I do anything major (though I will remove that link to my username--kinda tacky, in retrospect). —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 18:31, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

Were any of the scores or things I said useful? Your pee review had been sitting there since the last days of May, so I figured, you know.   Le Cejak • <18:36 Jun 08, 2009>

Could you pee on this?

UU/Papa Recommended you, so I thought I'd ask. It's the first article I've made here. Little Pink Sock 19:41, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

I told her you'd do a good job - don't go making me a liar now! ;-) --UU - natter 20:34, Jun 8

Hey guys! ...Uh, okay! I'm not going to score the sections per se, I'm just going to review. I would've recommended other new writers to review this, as they would have better perspective, but hey, I was a noob not too long ago. Still am, I know.   Le Cejak • <20:36 Jun 08, 2009>

Thanks chap - that should be plenty to be getting on with. --UU - natter 21:21, Jun 8

UU, hey! ...You think I did okay? Even though I didn't score it?   Le Cejak • <21:23 Jun 08, 2009>

I guess it isn't bad for a review. Can't say I can compare it with any previous writing of that sort. I've never written a How To. I did what I could with pictures for now. I was thinking about getting a diagram of a baby, but am not sure where to start looking. And I'm mostly fumbling around blindly right now. It's a start at least. So I thank you for the effort you put in, it's appreciated. I think UU said something about there being a place to request images from. So I guess I'll look there. As it just happens, you really don't sleep much with babies around, so for a tired mind, that's a relatively good article. Speaking of the devil... I think it's feeding time. I wish I could afford a nanny for a week so I could sleep. Little Pink Sock 21:25, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

Cajek: You of all people should know it's a lot less about the scores than giving enough feedback to work with! ;-) LPS: see my talk page. --UU - natter 21:29, Jun 8

Hey

Hey there. I decided to take your advice and sign up. Thanks for the fun on the IRC, that place was getting boring XD

Blade bane 08:57, 9 June 2009 (UTC)Blade bane

Yeah, I will take a look around and see whats good. Might make an article sometime, granted you think it doesnt suck.

Blade bane 09:18, 9 June 2009 (UTC)Blade bane

Thank You

A big thankee for reverting my user page after it was blanked by a troll-vandal or a 'Trolldel'. I am not sure why he (surely not a she) was targeting me either. In fact as I had 'blanked' it myself a while back to remove stuff , I still find it strange why people go to the pointless effort in doing this. Well...never mind but thanks again. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate). 16:34, 10 June 2009 (UTC)

You're welcome. The guy blanked ten pages then disappeared. If it WAS a gal, it's the kind we think are whores and not worth hanging around unless we want to get certain transmitted diseases. Slut.   Le Cejak • <16:49 Jun 10, 2009>

Probably because they don't really realise or think about how little goes into reverting it. I suspect some presume that it has to be re-written to get it back. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 16:56 10 June 2009

Award

Rabbi Techno would like to honour you with the coveted

BLUE SCROTUM AWARD
Which is given to those who have demonstrated remarkably excellent judgement,
impeccable good taste and faultless, all-encompassing wisdom
(by doing something like voting for ME to win WotM).
Well done and thankyou, from Rabbi Techno.

---

good job

You are the top of VFH Hall of Shame with 32.5 feature articles. --Docile hippopotamus 10:13, 11 June 2009 (UTC)

Oh man, I want my name taken off that list.   Le Cejak • <15:51 Jun 11, 2009>

Thank you

YOU ARE LOVED! And in appreciation for your donation to The Billy Graham Evangelistic Association I am sending a sign of my personal love for you — your very own polyester prayer handkerchief, suitable for wiping the tears of joyous revelation. ~ B. G.

Delivered by his personal altar boy. --T. (talk) 13:46, 11 June 2009 (UTC)

lobster!

...is it almost done? i've rounded off each section that isn't interlude and they all have lovely pictures. UU said he'd 'sod some more gimlets' tomorrow, which i think is british for 'i will work on it'. also, feel free to remove anything of mine that you don't think fits, it wont hurt my feelings. SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 20:37, 11 June 2009 (UTC)

This is becoming one of the funniest articles I've ever contributed to. I'll think of something to add, soon. Also, check out User:Hyperbole/VFG   Le Cejak • <20:40 Jun 11, 2009>

i know...it's like the perfect storm, everything came together so wonderfully. UU even said he was having fun! i think we should indeed get VFG rolling again, that way users who don't think much of their writing skills can gain some confidence without experiencing the crushing defeat of VFH. plus...i enjoy reading articles, and there's only so many features.

fun fact: you, UU, and myself all joined uncyclopedia within 25 days of each other in july 07. SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 13:51, 12 June 2009 (UTC)

Does that mean we're both your sockpuppets, then? I'm a little confused. --UU - natter 15:36, Jun 12

Late Congrats...

...on becoming Uncyclopedia's most featured author ever. Nice job. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 14:46, 12 June 2009 (UTC)

You know... at first it was hard, but then you get in a groove, you know? I was reading about some drama that's occurring on Wikipedia where Jim Wales himself banned an admin, and I was like... that place is nuts.   Le Cejak • <14:47 Jun 12, 2009>

Yes, I might say you're doing a fine job. It's almost like every other article you write gets featured. Staircase CUN^t 14:58, 12 June 2009 (UTC)

Whether they deserve to be featured is another question. Answer: Yes. Yes they do. Okay, thank you guys, but I don't need to be praised all the time :) my head's big enough as it is. That stuff about wikipedia was me going: god, uncyclopedia > wikipedia drama   Le Cejak • <15:01 Jun 12, 2009>

What's a wikipedia? People talk about it being lame here. Im so left owt! Staircase CUN^t 15:05, 12 June 2009 (UTC)

Wikipedia is what would happen if God took a wiki made out of shit, dipped it in shit, and then threw it in an ocean of shit filled with shitfish. THAT'S wikipedia.   Le Cejak • <15:14 Jun 12, 2009>

Ah, I see. Sort of. Do you think my UnNewses are goo? Cheddar nommed me for the UN:FP. Staircase CUN^t 15:24, 12 June 2009 (UTC)

I might vote for you when you stop whoring in your god damned signature ;)   Le Cejak • <15:26 Jun 12, 2009>

Haha. Well, I'm on my way to another UnNews. It's a completely different style than all my other ones. Staircase CUN^t 15:30, 12 June 2009 (UTC)

It's here, if you haven't read it already. Staircase CUN^t 18:21, 12 June 2009 (UTC)

AAAHH! I CAN'T SEE ANYTHING: YOU'RE STILL WHORING IN YOUR SIGNATURE!   Le Cejak • <19:21 Jun 12, 2009>

Fine, fine, I'll ditch it. Staircase CUN^t 19:26, 12 June 2009 (UTC)

By the way, do you think I'm behaving myself well? Staircase CUN^t 06:13, 13 June 2009 (UTC)

You're doing great, Steps. Just remember to keep writing, and remember that awards aren't everything. I wish someone would review the stuff you have sitting on pee review. I would do it myself, but I really want third opinions.   Le Cejak • <6:16 Jun 13, 2009>

I really don't care about the awards, that's just extra. Right now I'm focusing on gettign a feature, but I haven't been able to write a lot lately. PS, did you read the UnNews? Staircase CUN^t 06:19, 13 June 2009 (UTC)

Oh, don't worry about getting a feature, yet either. Did you want to guess how long it took before I got a feature? Two months, and I didn't even know what VFH was! What I would do is write about a topic you know tons about, instead of trying for stand-up comedy. Your weather report thing is like a script in a sitcom. I guess my first feature was like an UnScript or something. Maybe try writing something with one of your buddies? Maybe just review stuff until you feel inspired enough to write? Vote on VFH until a sentence in one of those things gives you an idea? ONE IMPORTANT THING: When you DO write articles, do it all in one burst. Don't do a paragraph a day, or anything, unless it's a collab. Whew! Words!   Le Cejak • <6:27 Jun 13, 2009>

Words of useful advice. Thanks! Staircase CUN^t 06:29, 13 June 2009 (UTC)

Are we doing this now?

I think I wrote that one line, then skipped outta here for like 5 months and forgot about it. Should we have a plan with it, or just say screw it and write some crazy rant? (also, apparently that page doesn't exist. Perhaps links don't like apostraphes) Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 16:33, 12 June 2009 (UTC)

Did you see what me and Gerry and UU did on Lobster? Completely unplanned.   Le Cejak • <16:37 Jun 12, 2009>

Oh good. I don't do well with plans anyway. However, I did get to watch your userpage vandalism for an hour or so, and I good laugh out of all of that. I've never seen rampant vandalism turn into an article rewrite. I like it. Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 16:42, 12 June 2009 (UTC)

Vandalism

Yoo go an' vand'lize mah' userpage again; Ay cut yoo. *brandishes knife* —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 19:23, 12 June 2009 (UTC)

Hey Cajunk

bet he's never had that one before Thanks for the review! I'm gad you liked it alot more than I do. And I'm also pleased that some one goes in depth with prose (sorting out expression and stuff is always easier to spot in someone elses writing than your own). Although I would kinda like you to explain the ten for concept, I thought I didn't have one. It's not jsut because it's third person is it? ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 20:48 12 June 2009

Rape!

Why did you rape my edits? —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 15:53, 13 June 2009 (UTC)

They were raping my eyes! (Rape jokes are pretty juvenile, and we don't need to advertise for Wikipedia) But seriously, I only undid two of 'em... Unless Gerry or UU both disagree (because I'm 1/3rd of this project), I say no rape jokes for Lobster. Thanks anyway though Socky, sorry   Le Cejak • <16:00 Jun 13, 2009>

Did somebody mention juvenile rape? Join IC already Cajunk! -OptyC Sucks! CUN16:02, 13 Jun

Gah! I'm already on here too much as it is, plus summer school starts monday and, uh, I'm gonna have to disappear unexpectedly again for no reason sometime in the near future.   Le Cejak • <16:04 Jun 13, 2009>

I do think that image needs somekind of caption. Would you have deleted it without the rape link? —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 16:06, 13 June 2009 (UTC)

I see OptyC took care of it. His caption is better. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 16:25, 13 June 2009 (UTC)

I hate rape "jokes", as I kind of hint every time I archive my talk page. If I'd have seen 'em, I'd have got rid pretty quick. Good work, Cajek! --UU - natter 16:33, Jun 13

I agree, thanks, UU!   Le Cejak • <16:34 Jun 13, 2009>

It wasn't really a rape joke though. More like describing two males fighting to mate with a female, like I might imagine to happen in the real world. Though it didn't really add any humour, so yeah. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 16:42, 13 June 2009 (UTC)

Molestation

You did some things on Traditional Values. Did you notice how Stoat Molesting is now a red link? —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 19:32, 13 June 2009 (UTC)

Yeah, I know. I was on break when it went on VFD! Where did it go, anyway?   Le Cejak • <22:02 Jun 13, 2009>

Here it is: User:MrN9000/Stoat Molesting —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 22:03, 13 June 2009 (UTC)

Ha, awesome! Thanks, socky. I always liked linking to that article.   Le Cejak • <22:08 Jun 13, 2009>

So. Snow White.

I think I cleared it up a bit but if there's anything else language wise that needs sorting would you mind? ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 21:42 13 June 2009

I'll take a look in a bit, Orian   Le Cejak • <22:02 Jun 13, 2009>

Thanks!

FROM THE DESK OF GUILDENSTERNENSTEIN

Thank you for supporting my recently featured article.

I, like, appreciate your support, or something.

—Guildy

---

Thank you oh lord of bannination...

Thank you ... ... for supporting my recently featured picture. A baby potato shall be mercilessly sacrificed in your honour. - Sonje

--^Dame 18:16, 14 June 2009 (UTC)

Hey Pops

I want to finally write a good article on river. However, I want someone to sort of guide me with it, and generally show me how to write better. Feel like helping me out? Staircase CUN^t 01:42, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

Do you have an idea of what style it's going to be written in, my son?   Le Cejak • <1:43 Jun 15, 2009>

Well, just your standard, encyclopedic article about a mass of water. I'm not sure how to make that funny, but I can sthink of something. I think. Staircase CUN^t 01:45, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

Start out thinking about what famous rivers there are. Then, mix up the history for a first coating of funny, is what I would recommend. Confuse the nile and the mississippi, and you've got mark twain and the pharoahs. Might be interesting. Yangtze in China and the Amazon, you could confuse those and have the mayans in asia... lots of stuff. That might be a good foundation for your article. What do you think?   Le Cejak • <1:48 Jun 15, 2009>

Sounds like fun. I've got some dishes to wash, and I'll get thinking then. Staircase CUN^t 01:49, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

That was fun last night. *wink* Staircase CUN^t 23:14, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

OH MY! ...ooohhhh mmmyyyyy   Le Cejak • <23:16 Jun 15, 2009>

Sometimes I crack myself up, and this was not a case. Staircase CUN^t 23:17, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

I used to vandalize my pop's userpage, but he's more mature than I am, which means we didn't have vandal wars like that. And he's 10 years younger I think!   Le Cejak • <23:23 Jun 15, 2009>

Well that sucks. YOu must have been robbed of your fun. Staircase CUN^t 23:28, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

He's an AWESOME and funny adopter, for srz! But he's more the admin-style type of adopter, because I still don't "get" this place, and barriers have to be put up so that I don't fuck with things people care about. I don't find many rules on this website to be set in stone. In fact... there's only two   Le Cejak • <23:39 Jun 15, 2009>

And aparently I've already broke one of those. Whoops. Staircase CUN^t 23:42, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

You did?   Le Cejak • <23:44 Jun 15, 2009>

2. Theoretically. Staircase CUN^t 23:44, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

YOU ARE IN SOOOO MUCH TROUBLE, YOUNG MAN!!!   Le Cejak • <23:47 Jun 15, 2009>

No, daddy! No! Don't spank me! Staircase CUN^t 23:49, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

I'll do you one better worse: I'm gonna force you to read Uncyc's article on cats and make all the lolcat jokes grammatically correct.   Le Cejak • <23:54 Jun 15, 2009>

NOOOO NOOOOOO!!!!!! Wait, how are you going to force me? Staircase CUN^t 23:56, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

Like this: doooo iiiiiitttt dooooooo iiiiiittt oooooOOOOOOoooooohh!   Le Cejak • <23:59 Jun 15, 2009>

It's not working. 00:02, 16 June 2009 (UTC)