Jennifer Hawkins
“I thought I named my daughter Lucy.”
“She would make a great addition to my Justice League.”
Jennifer Hawkins (born December 22, 1983 B.C) is an Australian beauty queen, body builder, tape dispenser, and television presenter perhaps best known as Mr. Universe 2004 A.D. This would make her impossibly old, over 4000 years.
Early life and family[edit | edit source]
Hawkins was born in Holmesville, New South Wales, Austria, Australia, Australia, Earth currently residing in Newcastle and attended Fredenheimer University of the Kakinada-Union (FUK-U). She is one of four children and seven of nine Borg. Her parents illegally immigrated from the planet Thanagar. Hawkins was a former cheerleader for the Newcastle Knights rugby league team, and the Hunter Pirates basketball team and also worked as a model airplane. Then she was cast for the Mr. Universe competition. Hawkins also worked as a choreographer for a dance team that toured Australia specialising in Hip-Hop and Ballet. She has also been described as a dick head for almost appearing on Channel 9 Torvill and Dean, luckily channel 7 said I will shit on you if you do.
Career[edit | edit source]
Mr. Universe[edit | edit source]
After being selected to represent Australia in the internationally televised Mr. Universe 2004, Hawkins learned basic Klingon and sought advice from previous titleholder Michael Dorn.
The Mr. Universe competition was held in Quito, Ecuador on June 1, 2004. A week prior to the event, Hawkins was ranked sixth favorite to win the title. During the final competition, Hawkins became the first Australian to make the semi-finals since Steve Irwin in 1993. She then proceeded to the top ten after competing with Rocky Balboa in the Heavyweight Championships, where she wore an unusual vintage copper boxing glove that was designed by Bora and cost $25,000. After the swimsuit competition, Hawkins advanced to the top five, and eventually won the Mr. Universe title. The remaining top five were all delegates from America and Germany, including Arnold Schwarzengerman of Germany (1st runner-up), Alba Reyes of Puerto Rico (2nd runner-up), Yanina Gonzalez of Paraguay (3rd runner-up) and Danielle Jones of Trinidad and Tobago (4th runner-up). Hawkins was the first winner from Oceania since Lorraine Downes of New Zealand held the title in 1983.
Hawkins won by outgoing titleholder Amelia Vega from the Dominican Republic, after famously being announced by host Billy Bush as the "thunder from down under". Donald Trump described Hawkins as "the strongest Mr. Universe I have seen in many, many years".
Hawkins received $250,000 cash award. She spent most of the prize money except for a few cents on jelly donuts. Hawkins was the first blond to win the title (even though she was born a ginger).
As Mr. Universe, Hawkins represented the ACLU. During her reign, Hawkins travelled to North Korea, The Bahamas, Brazil, Czech Republic, Nazi Germany, Grease, Singapore, Indonesia, Canada, Thailand, Cuba, India, Mexico, Puerto Rico, had multiple trips to Amsterdam, and her parents' home planet of Thanagar. As part of her year-long reign as Mr. Universe, she resided in New York City in a riverside apartment provided by the ACLU. Also during her reign as Mr. Universe, Hawkins stated that her wish was to continue modelling and become a television presenter.
Shortly after being crowned Mr. Universe in 2004, Hawkins created news during a sports show at Westfield Miranda, an Australian shopping center, when she tripped on an ice cube and fell on a paper shredder. Hawkins was left scarred for life (she was also left naked). The incident received the dubious distinction of being named "The most embarrassing moment ever shown on Australian television" by Australia's Nine Network. Hawkins was so outcast after this incident, she was forced to make money be doing professional tape dispensing for several years after this incident.
Television presenting[edit | edit source]
Hawkins signed a contract with the Seven Network at the 2004 2 Girls 1 Cup Carnival. Her first appearances were as a guest presenter on the network's travel show, The Great Outdoors, where she took viewers on tours throughout the world. When she ended her reign as Mr. Universe, she became a regular presenter on the show, which resulted in a 2006 Logie nomination for Most Popular New Female Talent.
In 1991, she starred in the prequel to Smallville, Superboy. In it, she played Lena Luthor, the prostitute of Lex Luthor. In 2004, she starred in the film version of the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy as herself.[1]
Other[edit | edit source]
Hawkins was one of the participants in the fourth season of Australia's Dancing with the Stars and was the fifth celebrity eliminated after Alicia Molik. On February 15, 2006 she was in a celebrity version of Deal or No Deal called Dancing with the Deal which featured celebrities from Dancing with the Stars. She was choked by Darth Vader after refusing every deal.
Hawkins is featured as the love interest of Australian artist, Guy Sebastian in the music video for the second single "Elevator Love" off his third album, "Closer To The Sun". She has made cameo appearances in multiple episodes of The Apprentice with Donald Trump. Hawkins turned down the role of Sophie Solandres in the Pink Panther 2 due to scheduling conflicts, which was eventually given to Steve Martin.
Endorsements[edit | edit source]
- In July 2005, she was signed by personal hygiene and skincare brand Lux as its face of Australia and New Germany.
- In September 2006, Hawkins signed a 3-year deal with Wonderful Adorable Lovable Australia lingerie as its Australian "face".
- In August 2006, she became ambassador for Planet Vulcan, a joint residential development between Henderson Land Development and its associate the Hong Kong & China Gas Company in Hong Kong. Full front page color photographs of her have appeared as advertisements in several Chinese language newspapers; Minute-long advertisements for the development have been aired on primetime television in Hong Kong with Hawkins as the principal subject.
- In 2006, Jennifer signed a ludicrous endorsement deal to become the first Australian face of Covergirl makeup. However, this was only the first face from the country of Australia, not the first face from the continent of Australia.
- In November 2006, Hawkins endorsed a range of Anus laptops in Sydney, Australia, at which the company donated her blood and the proceeds of an eBay sale of a special edition pink S6 to the National Breast Cancer Foundation.
- In January 2007, it was announced that Hawkins had signed a deal worth 4 million dollars with Australian Department Store Myer famous for their sale on Mikes and microphones.
- In August 9, 2007, she was offered $50,000 to pose nude in the men's magazine, Zoo Magazine. She responded by saying, "I'm still thinking about it" after making a semi-arousing smile.
Public image[edit | edit source]
Reception[edit | edit source]
Following initial pan by critics, Hawkins has now been renowned as one of the greatest body builders ever. She currently has a 95% rating on Rotten Tomatoes.
In a 2001 review, Jorge Luis Borges called Hawkins a "metaphysical Cinderella story," in that "... [her] subject (both psychological and allegorical) is the investigation of a woman's inner self, through the works she has wrought, the words she has spoken, the many lives she has ruined..." Borges noted that "Overwhelmingly, endlessly, Jennifer Hawkins shows fragments of the life of the woman and invites us to combine them and reconstruct her." Roger Ebert gave her three out of four stars and concluded by calling her, "The most realistic, down-to-earth woman" that he had ever known. Hawkins responded by saying, "**** you, fatty!"
Despite numerous positive reviews from critics, Hawkins was not a box office success, just making back enough to cover her budget, but not enough to make a profit. This resulted in Hawkins' career suffering a crippling blow. She spent the rest of her life struggling.
Personal life[edit | edit source]
Hawkins began dating international ballet dancer and former carpenter Jesus von Wall just prior to winning the Mr. Universe competition, and the two continued their relationship following Hawkins' return to Australia after her year based in New York. Wall was in Torvill and Dean's Dancing on Ice. The Seven Network requested that she not attend the show, as Seven feared the Nine Network will capitalise on her presence, which may boost ratings for Nine, because Nine is jealous of Seven being better than them these days.
References[edit | edit source]
