User:MadMax/DYK

This is a list for DYK submissions which link to a featured article. For submissions prior to 2008, see Template:DYCdb. Every featured article should have a DYK entry.

2005

• Ireland
• Pot v. Kettle: ...that Pot v. Kettle was a landmark case in USA history, giving people the right to make hypocritical statements without fear of retribution? What made this Supreme Court case unique was the fact that the Pot himself was black, as was the Kettle.
• All Your Base Are Belong To Us: ...that All Your Base Are Belong To Us?
• Seven Deadly Sins: ...that the Seven Deadly Sins are nose-picking, hocking a loogie, rhyming words with themselves, inventing the cotton gin, winking at a baby, milking a goat on Wednesday, Internet downloads, and counting the number of Deadly Sins?
• Mediocre Britain
• RTFM: ...that RTFM is Interwebs-speak for "Repeat the first message". If someone tells you to RTFM, be patient with them and copy-and-paste your original message several times. Typing the message with capslock on will improve the chances that it will get through.
• Spanish Inquisition (TV show): ...that the Spanish Inquisition was a jovial TV quiz show between 1950-1955, which nobody expected?
• Mordor: ... that Mordor is a former Soviet nation, which became an autonomous republic in 1984 with the fall of Hadrian's Wall? It borders Slovenia, Land of the Dead, Euthanasia, Ankh-Morpork, Magincia, Cop Land and Iraq.
• George W. Bush: ...that "failure" is synonymous with "George W. Bush"? (or) ...that in 2001 George W. Bush passed the No Child Left Behind Act, which forbids soldiers in Iraq from leaving their children behind?
• Scotland: ...that Scotland is not currently allied with anyone although they do go out drinking and having a good time whilst watching the football with Ireland on occasion?
• Senator: ...that Senator is the brightest star system in the southern constellation of Toast?
• Robot
• Air Guitar: ...that the first performance involving an Air Guitar was a live open-air concert outside of Sherwood Forest where Lute player Allan O'The Dell and Court Jester Robin The Gnarled appeared sporting a radical new design of Lute they had crafted from air? (or) ...that it is important to tune your Air Guitar constantly, as any dust particles that stick to the complicated arrangement of air will completely deform it?
• IKEA: ... that it has been proven beyond reasonable doubt that the reason for 50% of modern marriages ending in divorce is because those people try to go to IKEA together for a relaxing afternoon?
• Livejournal: ...that Livejournal is a promising internet news station aimed at delivering only the quality stuff, such as "NO MOM I DONT WANT TO GO TOO BED YOUR GAY"?
• MC Hammer: ... that ** HTTP Error 403: Can't touch this! **?
• Cabbage: ...that a Cabbage can kill you just by looking at you funny? They rip people in half all the time, and roll around in their bloody entrails. They wouldn't even think twice about tearing off your arm, and jamming it through your eyesocket so that the fingers are sticking out your mouth, and then kicking you in the nuts, which would make you BITE YOUR OWN FINGERS OFF. The purpose of the cabbage is to flip out and KILL.
• Pong! the Movie: ...that while Pong! the Movie followed suit with the wildly popular video game genre, such as The Super Mario Brothers movie and Resident Evil, it did not play out as well in the box offices?
• National Try To Assassinate The President Day: ... that all of Grover Cleveland's presidencies were ended by successful assassinations?
• Vitamin: ...that Vitamins are a family of substances meant for ingestion that confer superhuman abilities on whoever eats them?
• Japan: ...that there is some kind of "country" offshore of China?
• Lies: ... that Santa Claus is real? If you haven't seen him it's because you've been naughty, telling lies, or Jewish.
• Doctor Who: ...that what marks the style of The Doctor out from other documentaries such as Horizon, The Day Today and Newsround Review is that the educational nature of the programme is carefully disguised behind a plot regarding aliens, time travel and such like, woven from the real-life adventures of Oscar Wilde?
• St. Peter's Basilica: ...that St. Peter's Basilica is a large reptilian creature with breath of fire and a gaze that can turn people into stone?
• Table of Contents: ...that the Book of Moses called The Table of Contents is the zeroth book of the Old Testament of the Holy Bible?
• Kitten hurling battle: ... that the kitten hurling battle originated in the steamy jungles of what is now Québec as a mating ritual of the Aztecs? Men would attempt to establish dominance over each other to impress females by measure of how vicious a kittening he could receive.
• Nostradamus: ... that Nostradamus was regarded as one of the best prophecy writers of the 13th century, penning the bestsellers The Da Vinci Code and 1984 which both won Ivor Novello Awards for their lyrical content? Most prophets of his generation were stoned, but he was more unconventional, preferring to inject marmite.
• Teletubbies: ...that the Teletubbies, also known as the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, led Notre Dame to two football National Championships between 1920 and 1924? The four were all dominant figures in their respective positions in the back-field, crushing each opponent mightily.
• Phonics: ... that Phonics (pronounced Pa-hon-iks.) is one of the deadliest and most addictive drugs on the streets? It is said to get children "hooked" in four weeks or your money back.
• 1927: ... that the year 1927 was so awesome, immense applause at the end of it resulted in not one but eight encores?
• English-American Dictionary: ...that the English–American Dictionary was designed as a reference to Americans as they attempt to understand, and be understood, by English-type people? It is intended to prevent embarrassment caused by the misinterpretation of rubber and other such words and phrases.
• Axis of Evil Hot Dog Eating Competition: ...that the history of the Axis of Evil Hot Dog Eating Competition dates back to just before World War II? Benito Mussolini, seeking a way to bring his allies closer together, invited Adolf Hitler and Emperor Hirohito to Rome; Hitler brought a large number of frankfurters (his favourite) for the trip.
• Bon-bons
• The Oldest Trick in the Book: ...that The Oldest Trick in the Book is the infamous "Tapping on a person's left shoulder when you're standing on their right"? This trick was first chronicled in cuneiform by the Ancient Sumerians, who lived on the windswept steppes of Mesopotamia.
• Idiotic Table of Elements: ...that the Idiotic Table of the Elements was started by Greek scientist Idiocrates in 1430 BCE? The early table only contained four elements: Flaemon, Wettium, Windon, and Dirtium.
• KITTENHOEFFER magazine stand: ... that the KITTENHOEFFER magazine stand and the NAPAALM torture rack are actually made from identical components, but issued with different instruction leaflets?
• Open-Heart Surgery for Dummies: ... that Open-Heart Surgery for Dummies was added to the "Dummies" series in 2002 in light of a sudden demand for cheaper heart surgery? The do-it-yourself method was popularised by this book, written by Gerald Carter, a freelance writer with no medical experience whatsoever.
• You have two cows: ...that you have two cows; Bessie, Maisie, and Clarabelle? You also have trouble counting.
• Game:Zork: ...that you have been eaten by a Grue?
• Cowation: ...that the process of dying and coming back to life as a cow is known as reincownation?
• Anonymous: ...that Anonymous has written over 4,323,904,528 poems and 23,900,241 short stories, among a million other kinds of written word? (or) ...that, because of Anonymous' credibility, he has become a frequent source of information for news articles?
• Lord Byron: ... that Lord Byron was killed on May 25, 1840, in a pistol duel with Oscar Wilde at Wilde's East London apartment in what was promoted by Don King as the "Spat in the Flat"?
• Aesop's Fables: ...that, according to Aesop, a tortoise and a hare agreed to race? The hare took off at a tremendous pace, but lay down to sleep on the way. The slow but steady tortoise thus emerged victorious. Moral: Tortoises frequently carry rohypnol. Never leave your drink unattended when tortoises are about.
• Romania: ...that Romania's primary import is drama? Romanian roommates are the world's greatest natural source of drama, and their output does not diminish over time. Romania is also the world's leading exporter of vampires, gymnasts and sexual fetishisation of old women.
• Greatest Inventions: ...that dentists have admitted that, thanks to the invention of the electric toothbrush, they are now pretty much useless? Many only survive by living on the street and collecting donations from people who give them money because they don't realize that they are dentists.
• Banned from the Internet: ...that as soon as you compare someone to Hitler, you lose the argument immediately, the thread closes, and you are Banned from the Internet? Proposing war for the purity of the Aryan blood is an effective way to trick your opponent into comparing you with Hitler; you will also win a Certificate of Hitlertude.
• Fountainhead Earth: ...that Ayn Rand's Fountainhead Earth series achieved negative sales, with critics sending their copies back as returns and more copies being remaindered than were actually printed?
• WMD (Donuts): ...that WMD refers to "W's Missing Doughnuts", an incident at a Cabinet meeting that is the most probable cause for The War Against Terror?
• Kool Aid: ... that Kool Aid was a benefit concert held in order to help cool people everywhere, who were struggling to maintain their hip status in a world filled with squares?
• University of California: ...that the University of California was founded in 1868 by giant reptilian hippies from the planet Zarkon? It is the 56th State of the United States of America and owes its economic success to the fact that it is the only state of the union to abolish private property and become a communist utopia.
• The Official List of the Best Things in Existence: ...that language is believed to have first been discovered around 45,000,000 BC when, moving rocks from one big pile of rocks to another large pile of rocks, an unnamed caveman dropped a rock on his foot and uttered the pivotal first word: “Moog”? Modern scholars have extensively studied this word and, going through all root languages, cite the modern translation of “Moog” to be “Fuck, my toe!”
• Banana Phone: ...that the disposal of broken banana phones by tossing them out the window onto the road often leads to a driver running over the banana and spinning out?
• Incompleteness Theorem: ... that Gödel's famous Incompleteness Theorem states that no Talk page is ever complete? He proved it by the diagonalization method, forming a diagonal string of comments of "we should end this discussion now" entries. This result was later improved on by repeatedly adding of "Shut up".
• Fascist: ...that the word fascist refers to anyone who annoys you, even slightly? Why exactly the fascists stopped strutting around in black shirts publicly assaulting their enemies, and started correcting the spelling of your e-mails and telling you off for not washing your coffee cup is unknown.
• Nihilism: ... that when it was featured, Nihilism was the most content-free entry in history?
• Kitten Huffing: ... that Kitten Huffing is a popular, though controversial, alternative to street drugs such as skag and crank?
• Fanfiction.net: ...that Fanfiction.net, originally formed to distribute Harry Potter slash/fiction, was created by Josef Mengele as a means to test the limits of human endurance?
• War on Terra: ...that in late 2001, President Bush declared total war on Planet Earth and all nation states and ecosystems harboring life?
• Stereotype Reassignment Surgery: ...that Stereotype Reassignment Surgery is a newly invented technique allowing national, ethnic and social groups who are fed up with their current stereotypes to trade them with another group?
• Raccoon Tail v. Super Mario Cape: ...that not since Pot v. Kettle has the Supreme Court presided over a more important case than Raccoon Tail v. Super Mario Cape?
• The Flintstones: ...that the Flintstones obviously pre-dates the Honeymooners since it takes place at a time in history when men and dinosaurs shared the earth?
• Terri Schiavo: ...that Terri Schiavo, a martyr, was beatified for the miracle of distracting the American public long enough that God's will could be codified as law without anyone raising a fuss about it?
• Estonia: ...that the word "Estonia" consists of two different words: "Est" and "Onia". Est means East and Onia=Onion, so Estonia should actually be called The Eastern Onion Country?
• Flying Spaghetti Monster: ...that Flying Spaghetti Monsterism is the world's most intelligent and fastest-growing religion?
• List of weapons that don't exist, but should: ... that the gun that shoots guns that shoots swords is similar to the gun that shoots swords, but instead of shooting swords, it shoots another gun? When the second gun reaches the end of the string, you pull back on the first gun and the second gun shoots a sword.
• Random humor: ...that random humour is unique in that it is the only type of humor that is an ingredient in Jell-O? It is best known for being similar to Mountain Dew in that it has no use in solving a maze.
• World War I (video game): ...that *SERBIA_ROLLZ strikes ArchDuke for 47 damage! A critical hit!*?
• Wikipedia
• Wikipedia/old: ...that the wicked Wikipedia is a tragic parody of Uncyclopedia, although Wikipedia claims the reverse.?
• Dude, Where's My Time Machine?: ...that the film Dude, Where's My Time Machine? has been criticized by physicists who claim the movie paints an unrealistic picture of time travel? Celebrated physicist and cartwheel champion Stephen Hawking said, "Even if we were to accept that that many sorority sluts could travel through time at once, it is still improbable that Mr. Kutcher would end up wearing one of the girls' panties."
• Quantum Economics: ... that Quantum Economics is a fundamental economic theory that unifies the economic theories of Max Planck, John Maynard Keynes, Ronald Reagan, Charles Ponzi and Neils Bohr?
• X Window System: ...that X-Windows completely determines the look, smell and feel of applications running on it in such a strict way that all application windows look exactly the same? Although this makes it look far better than Mac OS X and even Windows XP, some users find it hard to distinguish between their applications when they all have the same title.
• Certificate of Hitlertude: ...that whilst the Certificate of Hitlertude and the Certificate of Terrorism have been a rousing success, attempts to perform a similar service for people whose arguments have been compared to Communism have been less than successful as nobody cares anymore?
• Ipod Nano 200gb Instructions: ... that the modified iPod Nano 200 GB's capacity enables you to store about 50 000 pieces of music? If this capacity is filled with illegal "warez" mp3s, you can be fined up to 75 000 USD. (204 800 megabytes, 4 megabytes per song, 10 songs per CD, average CD price illegally fixed at 15 USD).
• Missing milk: ... that the mystery of the missing milk was a mystery that dominated newspaper headlines and became one of the greatest conspiracy theories of 1995? It remains unsolved with literally tens of police officers working on the case daily.
• Dake-Bonoism: ...that Dake-Bonoism is a modern synthesis of the pentecostal teachings of the late Rev. Finis Jennings Dake and lyrical writings of Bono (lead singer for the popular Irish band U2)?
• Orange construction barrels: ... that the Orange Construction Barrel (viaae fabricatio barrelus) is one of several species of highly specialized plants which have adapted to be able to grow in the most extreme of conditions - the roadways of North America? It is the second most common member of the sub-genus fabricatio -- commonly known as the "fabriforms" -- and is prized for its weather-resistance and bioluminescent fruit.
• Bloodbath: ...that bloodbath is one of the most frequently attended spectator sports; Major League Bloodbath matches are enjoyed by millions of people everyday on the radio and TV?
• Redundancy: ...that Redundancy is the use of superfluous text, speech, or items, repetitive text, speech, or items, that is more than what is required or is superfluous, repetitive, or more than required?
• Zombies: ...that zombies walk the Earth because there is simply no more room left in Hell; this as a result of the "No More Room In Hell Act" of 1662 wherein Satan outlawed further immigration into Hell because of "those damn dirty Americans" stealing all of the good jobs there and putting immense stress on the demonic economy?
• Crimes inspired by video games: ...that with the release of the limited editions of Spy vs. Spy and 3 Stooges, an outbreak of people having pianos dropped on them, being rolled over by steamrollers and encountering other bizarre incidents occurred? The next day, however, all of the victims were inexplicably unharmed.
• Newmath: ... that Newmath was approved by Minitrue for inclusion into the Oceania state newcurriculum in 1984, along with newspeak and goodthink?
• Bar Mitzvah: ...that, since a bar means a group of attorneys and Mitzvah means good deed, most Jewish scholars believe Bar Mitzvah translates to "It's good to know how to sue someone"?
• AAAAAAAAA!: ...that AAAAAAAAAAAA!
• Peer: ... that Peer is this annoying guy who hangs out on IRC? He has connections with the Masters of the Internet so his name is always hidden from the user lists in channels. When someone least expects it, Peer jumps out and resets their connections.
• The GI Joe-Transformers War: ...that the GI Joe-Transformers War took place in 1988, and resulted in the Autobots/Joe Alliance (AJA) gaining control over the Union of Decepticon and Cobra Forces' (UDCF) strongholds in the Bedroom and Backyard theatres?
• Styrofoam: ...that Styrofoam is a slightly edible fruit which is produced in overwhelming quantities from nothing at all?
• -- --- .-. ... . / -.-. --- -.. .
• Alternate Universes I Seriously Hope Do Not Actually Exist: ...that in the Perpetual 80's alternate universe, after December 31, 1989 all time-keeping devices revert back to Tuesday, January 1, 1980 due to a bug in the alternate universe's C64 system code?
• Much Ado About Yokels: ... that Much Ado About Yokels by William Shakespeare is sassy, witty, funny, scathing, poised, naïve, twitterpated, smarmy, biting, sarcastic, caustic, intrepid, loathsome, riotous, and a terrible piece of theatre? After this play was published in 1902, it was doubtful that Shakespeare would ever work in Hollywood again.
• Founding Fathers: ...that middle and high schools in America frequently exaggerate the intelligence, achievements and superpowers of the country’s Founding Fathers?
• British film industry: ...that the film industry of Mediocre Britain has become one of the most successful film industries in the world as its wise and far-sighted producers, realising in the mid-80’s that people were afraid of any form of innovation or originality in the cinema, endlessly re-make the same 3 movies?
• Philip Glass: ... that Philip Glass (January 31, 1937 – ) is a composer of minimalist music, who once worked as a taxi driver in; Philip Glass (January 31, 1937 – ) is a composer of minimalist music, who once worked as a taxi driver; Philip Glass (January 31, 1937 – ) is a composer of minimalist music, who once worked as a taxi...
• Air: ...that air is a fictional substance that was once believed to fill the space above the surface of the Earth? While this "air theory" was once used to explain various phenomena, air theory, at last refuted, has joined the gene, the atom, Antarctica, and the free lunch in a long list of scientific red herrings.
• Gibberish: ...that Gibberish is a European language spoken on the windswept steppes of the British-controlled Iberian region of Gibraltar?
• The Most Quotable Smackdown of All Time: ...that “You can't kill Mark Twain, judge. He's an immortal piece of Nineteenth Century Americana.” ~ Winston Churchill
• Uncyclopedia Brown: ...that Uncyclopedia Brown is the fictional hero of a series of detective stories for small children written by Oscar Wilde? His real name is Rasputin H. Brown, but he is known by the nickname Uncyclopedia, due to his vast knowledge of facts, figures and dates, all of which are untrue, misleading or inaccurate.
• Niggers: ... that, while controversy has arisen over the name, imagery and the lack of African-American players or management of the Birmingham Niggers baseball club, the team's media guide notes: "You don't see any Native Americans playing for the Indians or Redskins, do you?"
• Keira Knightley In A White Corset And Kate Beckinsale In A Black One: ... that Keira Knightley In A White Corset And Kate Beckinsale In A Black One is a 2006 film starring Keira Knightley in a white corset and Kate Beckinsale in a black one? The film was titled according to the 2005 Hollywood Truth In Titling regulations.*Fecal E. Coli: ...that Fecal E.Coli is the flagship product of the legendary Coca Coli Company?
• J.D. Salinger: ... that J.D. Salinger was this guy, he was a writer I think? He wrote this book, it was about baseball or bread or something.
• Afghanistan: ...that Afghanistan is a country located in Central Asia and in the Middle East, serving as a vital bridge between “nations that like to blow themselves up” and “nations that nobody really cares about"? (or) ...that Afghanistan is known for its lush dirt farms, where dirt and dust are cultivated by villagers to enhance the scenic emptiness for which the region is known?
• Barrel Clown: ...that a barrel clown is a clown that sleeps in every 14th construction barrel on the road? They sit in there all day, eating sandwiches until somebody hits their barrel with their car.
• Euroipods: ...that Euroipods is a website giving away free ipods in return for completing offers and reffering freinds to do the same?
• German grammar: ...that in German, you can easily wordyouanywaylikesentencetogetherputtingbybuild? In fact, it's mandatory. Talk like Yoda and take out the spaces.
• Emoticonics: ...that Emoticonics, a well regarded and inconcievable science with a rich history and creamy centre, was established in the early eighteen sixty ones by Anonymous and was initially concerned almost entirely with developing a method for the faceless to convey emotion? ;)
• Attack of the 500 foot Jesus: ...that the Attack of the 500 foot Jesus will take place at exactly 06:06:06 on Tuesday the 1st of January, 2008, on the dot? Thus will Nostradamus finally be proven wrong, since he stupidly predicted that all of this would occur a full three days later.
• Red Shirts: ...that when an expendable member of the crew in Star Trek wears a special uniform that creates reduced empathy, his death creates little discomfort, and he can be sacrificed for the good of the greater United Federation of Planets?
• IPod yocto: ... that the iPod yocto, Apple's 1,337th digital audio player this year, is the smallest possible iPod? Its width and length are physically impossible to measure simultaneously, and it is the first known digital audio player to weigh less than air.
• Poop Cuisine
• Poland: ... that you forgot Poland?
• George Bailey: ... that It's A Wonderful Life's George Bailey was one of the most renowned criminals of the 1940s?
• UnNews:New "voice chat" feature proposed for mobile phones: ...that while your mobile phone takes photos and video clips, plays music, receives and sends email, browses the Web, has a PDA with WiFi and Bluetooth built in and, of course, does text and picture messaging, Nokia has proposed yet another feature, called "voice chat?"
• John Seigenthaler Sr.: ... that Seigenthaler was himself assassinated on live TV in 1964 but made a special pact with Satan to preserve his living body, at the cost of his soul? Satan found his soul too small and stringy to be nutritious, and threw it in the garbage bin where it was never found.
• North Korea: ...that, according to the DPRK, "Kim Jong-Il is regarded by many as the greatest being that the entirety of humanity has ever seen?

• ...and has caught Mew in Pokémon, obtained the Triforce in The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time, and resurrected Aeris in Final Fantasy VII?"

• UnPoetia:The Night After Christmas: ...that 'twas The Night After Christmas when all through the house, was an orgy of presents worth more than*... the house?
• I Fucking Hate the Bermuda Triangle: ... that I Fucking Hate the Bermuda Triangle?
• The artist formerly known as God: ...that God (born God Cohen in 4004BC in Liverpool, England) is one of the most famous and prolific musicians in the Western world? Though he recorded under the name God during his early career, a contractual dispute with his former label led him to change his recording name to YHVH, a string of unpronouncable consonants?

2006

• Alternative medicine: ...that Alternative Medicine is a broad term describing those things which differ from actual medicine, which is hopelessly unhip and square. None of them are quite as healthy as you putting the bong down and getting some fresh air and exercise, but what are the odds of that happening?
• Nike Revolution of 2006: ...that during the Nike Revolution, many states changed names, split up, or grouped together, resulting in the drop from the original fifty states to 43, and the adoption of many other states from different lands?
• Nobody cares: ... that nobody cares? (or) ...that Wikipedia features DYKs about mosaic floors that were discovered between 1932 and 1939?
• Alliteration: ... about Alliteration articulating an artistic approach aimed at annotating and arranging alphabetic accoutrements as alarmingly asinine alignments?
• Finding Your Inner Sock Puppet: ...that according to the book Conflicting Emoticons: Learning to Love Your Inner Sock Puppet, "online sock puppets are each controlled by a real, unique person, with real, unique needs and feelings"?
• Gerrymander (politics): ... that Gerrymandering is the

arcane and magical art of drawing

mystical boundaries over a land

to separate

their inhabitants into what are known as

“congressional districts?"

• Gratuitous Anime Panty Shot: ...that no vessel on the open seas today can lay claim to a better sense of duty, valor, and success than the U.S.S. Gratuitous Anime Panty Shot?
• No More Room In Hell Act: ...that the No More Room in Hell Act of 1662 (PL 108-133) is the federal recognition of zombies as an ethnic group and the establishment of specialized programs for zombie immigration and naturalization?
• I Can't Believe it's Not Murder
• Worst 100 Ways to Deliver Bad News: ...taht erif a ni deid ylimaf ruoY?
• Old Tech: ...that Old Tech is the name given to the latest trend in high technology?
• Man uncyclopedia: ...that all Unix releases of Uncyclopedia come with a nifty manual page, which is far superior to Microsoft's .chm help files?
• Manhattan Engineering District: ... that to the mighty heroes of the Manhattan Engineering District all wrongdoing is a menace to be stamped out – whether it comes from outer space – from the watery depths of the seven seas – or springs full-blown from the minds of men!
• The Keep Your Finger In The Box Game: ...that The Keep Your Finger In The Box Game is one of Czechoslovakia's favorite American pastimes?
• External combustion engine: ...that the External combustion engine is the most efficient means of turning fuel into singed eyebrows?
• Moon hoax: ...that my cousin's osteopath knows this guy, right, who like totally met some guy who saw the studio that the fake moon landing was filmed in?
• VCR Manual: ...that a VCR Manual is very, very, very frustrating to read?
• Rocky Mountain Oysters: ...that testicles are edible and a good source of protein?
• Grand Conspiracy: ...that by reading this, you are now part of the Grand Conspiracy?
• Richard M. Stallman: ...that RMS is the composer of the Free Sockpuppet Song, and has been known to perform it on the recorder, or folk-slither to it when others play it?
• Zen: ...that Zen.
• Loneliness
• Midget cockpunching terrorists: ...that midget cockpunching terrorists are a threat to America and her allies?
• Neuroipods: ...that recent advances in nanobiotechnology have led to advanced, implantable music players capable of holding up to three seconds of low-quality MP3 audio?
• Toilet Door Communication: ...that Amazon.com started its business with its iconic layout on toilet doors, leaving customers to mark their orders, then delivering the package to a toilet of the shopper’s choice?
• World War I: ...that while both World Wars were in black and white, only World War I was silent?
• Torture: ...that torture is better to give than to receive?
• OCD: ...that the keyboard you have been using has more germs than your toilet seat?
• Unquotable:Cthulhu: ...that attempts to quote the Dread Cthulhu in its own dialect have led to many embarrassing misspellings, sometimes as extreme so as to turn, "In his house at R'lyeh dead Cthulhu waits dreaming" into a phrase translatable as, "In a sushi restaurant in R'lyeh topless Cthulhu waits tables"?
• Sexual innuendo: ...that the less known about sexual innuendo, the better?
• Don't be stupid: ...that the number one cause of your being stupid is your stupid mouth?
• Writer's block: ...that nobody can write anything if they can't think of anything?
• Humility: ...that humility is for suckers?
• Home Haggis Maker: ...that you can make fabulous Haggis by yourself in the comfort of your home?
• UnNews:Osama bin Laden awarded star on the Walk of Fame: ...that film director Osama bin Laden, who has recently gained popularity among cinema aficionados for his unconventional style of filming, has been award a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame?
• Westboro Baptist Church: ...that God has a feeling of strong disapproval with regards to fags?
• Murphy's law application for antigravitatory cats: ...that the combined effects of Murphy's Law and feline physics allow for cat-powered UFO engines?
• Bear: ...that if bears had the chance; they would sodomize you and your entire family?
• Vladimir Nabokov: ...that Vivid Vladimir, the Idol of my Eye, the artificer of amor, could not dispense with that which was most dear to him: chicken fingers?
• Captain Obvious: ...that Captain Obvious is known to regularly state the obvious?
• Do NOT click any links!: ...that for God's sake you should not click any links?
• Teenager: ...that teenagers are pretty much not good for anything, other than the occasional cane-beating, I 'spose.
• UnNews:Nigerian census finds millions of rich, desperate princes: ...that for the small price of an airplane ticket and Nigerian citizenship, you may already become a rich, desperate prince?
• Women's Suffrage: ...that Women's Suffrage is an abomination that must be stopped?
• Marcel Proust: ...that Marcel Proust was a man whose prose, delicate, could turn the soul around, could inspire even the lowest beggar to the heights of majesty, and could meander off in the most engaging direction, taking you along with it like a softly flowing river, like the sea itself, like the sun on the beach and like the waves under your feet?
• Hide and Go Jesus: ...that the game of Hide and Go Jesus is Vatican Approved, but only on Tuesdays?
• That old woman next door: ...that that old woman next door is the only person that the Mormons will never visit?
• Mozilla Firefox: ...that Mozilla Firefox is hotter than Internet Explorer?
• Vote Fish Penis: ...that you don't want to know what VFP stands for?
• Maozilla: ...that Andrea True had a 1976 hit with her single Mao, Mao, Mao?
• UnNews:Last spot in heaven taken; hundreds waitlisted: ...that Heaven has met its quota, and your dead granny has just been waitlisted?
• Water powered bus: ...that the water powered bus is an environmentally-friendly mode of public transport?
• Bouncy Castle: ...that a man's home is his Bouncy Castle?
• Internet (video game): ...that by killing that Forum Spammer, you have gained 4 experience?
• Age of Umpires: ...that Age of Umpires is a highly successful RPG/Strategy video game series in which the player takes control of a team of Umpires with the primary aim of officiating cricket matches?
• Insert title here: [insert ellipsis here][insert "that" here] [insert factoid here]?
• The Root of All Evil: ...that the The Root of All Evil is fishsticks?
• Distraction: ...that I am easily distracted ohhh! A quarter! Shiny...
• Citizen Kong: ...that "Ye" was Citizen Kong's pet name for his extra-favorite personal yo-yo, which he left back on Skull Island, completely forgot about, and then just remembered one split second before the planes got him?
• Biggles: ...that Biggles is the second most common cause of homosexuality in Britain, right after boarding school?
• HowTo:Avoid speeding tickets/fines: ...that speeding cameras are weaker than your car?
• Uncyclopedia is the worst: ...that Uncyclopedia is the worst?
• On a stick: ...that we're selling ice cream... on a stick?
• Colossus of Barbie: ...that the expensive Isis, Queen of Heaven Barbie™ comes with a full-sized Dream Pyramid™?
• Banana skin joke: ...that when the first Banana Skin Joke appeared in 1913, it was the funniest thing on the music hall scene? It easily beat Jugs Mahony's Spoon Dance and it fended off strong competition from The Singing Duck of Dresden.
• HowTo:Change a lightbulb: ...that changing a lightbulb often requires hundreds of gallons of alcohol?
• Goa Tse: ...that you too can become enlightened by stretching your anus wide?
• Handgun: ...that the handgun is one of the most pitiful guns you can find, seeing as it's part of your hand?
• UnBooks:Embracing Mediocrity: ...that you're fat, you're pushing forty, and faced with the realization that the boy who once dreamed of becoming an astronaut is no more?
• Oscar Mayer: ...that Oscar Mayer has a way with B-A-L-O-G-N-A?
• UnBooks:Adventure gamebook: ...that you are a precocious, introverted eleven year old boy with square glasses?
• Decapitation Disease: ...that there is a 100% chance that Decapitation Disease will be fatal?
• Segregation: ...that African Americans and White men should be kept away from each other?
• Patriotism: ...that Patriotism is the number two cause of battlefield fatalities, surpassed only by improper foot care?
• Blame somebody else: ...that I didn't do it?
• Idiocrates
• UnNews:National Gay Marriage Threat Level Raised to "Flamboyant": ...that citizens have been urged to “be vigilant, and on the lookout for queers” in response to an increased National Gay Marriage threat level?
• John Cage: ...that John Cage has never made silence sound more golden?
• Calvin and Hobbes: ...that Calvin and Hobbes was an action-packed buddy comedy series that ran from 1542-1549, featuring philosophers John Calvin and Thomas Hobbes as themselves?
• Rogue punchlines: ...that JESUS CHRIST ITS A LION GET IN THE CAR!!
• Neolithic Age: ...that archaeological records show the primitive ancestors of the Village People date back to the Late Neolithic Period, the same time as when Pink Floyd was formed?
• UnBooks:See Dick: ...you are seeing dick control what is going into these Uncyclopedia articles?
• UnBooks:Ernest Hemingway's Cookery Corner: ...that Earnest Hemingway can cook up a mean hot dog?
• Super Smash Bros.: Xtreme Beach Volleyball: ...that "xtreme" is not a real word?
• Gay Pride: ...that Gay Pride is like regular pride, but for people who are proud of being gay?
• Africa: ...that West Africa is poised to be the first e-mail-based economic superpower? Just send them USD $200 first!
• Speech to text software: ...that speech to text software and is a tool used to convert the spoken word into text format buyer at Compu term macro phone backspace a Computer microphone question mark
• Grue
• Z: ...that the letter Z on Sesame Street was rumored to be heavily addicted to paint?
• Jingo: ...that Jingo is the sport of kings?
• Command Line: ...that sudo apt-get install Command Line?
• Canada: ...that Canada and the USA share a common mother, that being England, but while America's father was apparently Jesus, Canada's was France? (or) ...that if you die in Canada, you die in real life?
• New Age Psychology: ...that New Age Psychology beats Old Age Psychology 2 to 1 in clinical trials?
• HowTo:Get Banned: ...that your block log has grown ten-fold?
• Universal Remote Control Everything 3000: ...that the Universal Remote Control Everything 3000 controls EVERYTHING??
• The Swedish Orienteering And Firing A Rat From A Cannon Championships: ...that the The Swedish Orienteering And Firing A Rat From A Cannon Championships are the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems?
• Barns and Nobles: ...that Barns and Nobles is the most successful medieval farming roleplaying game, played by millions of teenage nerds worldwide?
• Rap: ...that Rap is a genre of music that is centered around the essential musical concepts of syncopated rhythm and gettin' jiggy wit da ladieez and shit?
• Adobe Potatochop: ...that Adobe Potatochop is the industry standard software for chip production amongst chip shops the length and breadth of England?
• HowTo:Solve The 1x1x1 Rubik's Cube: ...that YOU TOO will soon be able to solve the 1x1x1 Rubik's Cube?
• Voynich Manuscript: ...that the Voynich Manuscript is nothing but a garbled, possibly Welsh, mess of letters?
• UnNews:RIAA CEO discusses the analog hole: ...that the basic problem that the RIAA has in protecting its property is that after people have bought music, they can actually listen to it?
• Snopes: ...that this factoid relating to Snopes has just been disproven by Snopes?
• Smells Like Teen Spirit: ...that we all smell a little bit like teen spirit, if we go a while without washing?
• Dark Ages: ...that the Dark Ages were caused by a lack of bon-bon deliciousness to make everyone happy and stop killing each other with swords and crossbows?
• Battle of Gettysburg: ...that a broken heart is worse than the political turmoil in 1863?
• Fisher Price: A Retrospective
• Memento: Pearce? Guy staring movie acclaimed an was Memento that...
• UnBooks:My First Necronomicon: ...that you never forget your first Necronomicon?
• Paradise Lost: ...that Paradise has been lost?

• ...and it hasn't been handed in at the Lost and Found, either?

• HowTo:Be a Tramp: ...that you can easily find food and all life's needs in a trash yard?
• Gazebo: ...that gazebo are only at ground level to make disabled people happy?
• HowTo:Maintain a vanity site on Wikipedia: ...that Washington High School has the best basketball team in the district and that Casey Baker is a total whore?
• Pixellated Face Disease: ...that nerdy gamers see the world in pixels?
• Lost in Translation: ...that the loss produces at the translation outstanding movie? (or) ...that I'm 無くなった in 翻訳?
• "Paul is dead" hoax: ...that according to legend, bass guitarist and singer Paul McCartney was replaced by a lookalike after his alleged death in an auto accident in the mid-60s?
• Humosexual: ...that chicks love a guy with a sense of humor?
• War of 1812: ...that the War of 1812 really started in 1813?
• UnNews:Diogenes searches world for honest mechanic: ...that Diogenes never did succeed in finding at honest mechanic?
• HowTo:Write A Cover Letter: ...that I am an enthusiastic, hard-working person who would do anything to get into Goldman Sachs?
• Medical Malpractice: ...that people everywhere are taking more stainless steel home with them after surgery?
• Suburban homeboy: ...dat my station wagon is the shizznit, mofo?
• Disneyland: ...that Disneyland is the oldest member nation of the Mickey Mouse League? (or) ...that anyone who dies at Disneyland receives a free lifetime pass?
• American Fundie Magazine: ...that the mission of American Fundie Magazine is to roll the clock back to a simpler time, before the evil secular humanists and their life partners, the Jews, stole the U.S.A. from the righteous and turned it from the high road of the loving goodness of the Old Testament onto the low road of *shudder* liberal Christianity or *gasp!* atheism, leading our great nation straight to Aich Ee Double Hockey sticks?
• Sausage Butty Batter Nugget: ...that the Sausage Butty Batter Nugget was once described by the Surgeon General as "a heart attack on a plate"?
• HowTo:Kill two birds with one stone: ...that it's only natural and human to want to kill as many birds with as few stones as possible?
• HowTo:Skip School: ...that only the cool kids skip school?
• A Tour of Baghdad: ...that unemployment in the city of Baghdad is very high, so many citizens have to look jobs in more remote sectors, such as a Private Defence Contractor (known colloqiually as a "Terrorist"), a Religious Nut (referred to as a "Terrorist" by the locals) or a Freelance Debris Architect (known outside of Baghdad by the slang term "Terrorist")?
• Fire hydrant: ...that fire hydrant lived a life of little significance, and made no particular impact on the lives of anyone?
• Hardwick Fundlebuggy's Prison Journal: ...that Hardwick Fundlebuggy's Prison Journal has been said to carry on the tradition of Dostoevsky and Solzhenitsyn?
• Hammer: ...that the hammer pounds things? Hard? Very Hard?
• Rorschach Inkblot Acid Test: ..that the Rorschach inkblots all look kinda like my Aunt Gladys giving head to Satan?
• Commemorative plate: ...that without Commemorative plates, madam, you could easily forget what the American flag looks like?
• UnPoetia:Horton Hires a Ho: ...that Dr. Suess was a real pervert?
• HowTo:Learn Hebrew: ...that Hebrew is a really fucking hard language to learn?
• French Revolution: ...that the French Revolution was just a rip-off of the American Revolution?
• Martin Van Buren: ...that Martin Van Buren is a total dick and nobody likes him?
• HowTo:Be pretentious: ...that nothing says "I'm better than you and I know it" better than dropping a line of Wordsworth into a conversation?

  ...no matter how irrelevant the actual line is?

• Hays Code: ...that before the introduction of the Hays Code, most movie stars swore like drunken longshoremen?
• Waiting for Godot: ...that Godot isn't coming?
• Washington and Lafayette
• The Putz Who Stole Hanukkah: ...that every Jew down in Jewville liked Hanukkah a lot, but some Putz, who lived just East of Jewville, did not?
• Church of God the Wholly Incompetent
• Jackson Pollock: ...that Jackson Pollock is the Jackson Pollock of painting?
• Water Polo... With Sharks!: ...that Water Polo... With Sharks! is now available ...with SAVINGS!? (or) ...that the sport of Water Polo can be greatly improved with the addition of sharks?
• Napoleon Bonaparte: ...that Napoleon suffered from short man syndrome?
• Political advertising: ...that you should vote Democrat?
• Wall Street Crash of 1929: ...the great Wall Street Crash of 1929 led to many opportunities for great photography of homeless people and farmers covered in dust the following years?
• Double Ristretto Venti etc.: ...that the Double Ristretto Venti Half-Soy Nonfat Decaf Organic Chocolate Brownie Iced Vanilla Double-Shot Gingerbread Frappuccino Extra Hot With Foam Whipped Cream Upside Down Double Blended, One Sweet'N Low and One Nutrasweet, and Ice is, contrary to popular belief, not the longest name or tallest order available at Starbucks, but is in fact the widest?
• UnTunes:The Uncyclopedian's Song: ...that this is the very model of an excellent 'Did You Know'?
• Pontius Pilot: ...that Pontius Pilot was the 20th hijacker in the September 11 attacks?
  • That Pontius Pilot never actually flew a plane in his life?
• The Bureaucracy Channel: ...that next up on The Bureaucracy Channel is stacking paper, and after that, staples?
• UnBooks:The Complete Idiot's Guide To Talking To Women: ...that talking with women is no easy task? (or) ...that telling someone you masturbated to their Facebook picture is frowned upon in society?
• Argos: ...that Argos stores exist for the sole purpose of taking advantage of those who are too scared to shop using t'internet? They still rely on the traditional methods of service, such as the sneer, the blank stare and outright rudeness.
• Total Fucking Asshole Server 2006: ...that Total Fucking Asshole Server 2006 is currently running this website and stealing your password?
• Gaydar: ...that we can now hunt down gay people for fun and profit?
• Life's Unanswerable Questions: ...that this is one of Life's Unanswerable Questions?
• Googlewhack: ...that ambidextrous scallywags and bamboozle guzzlers regularly indulge in panfish interrogation?
• Fundagelical Christianity: ...that Fundagelical Christianity is very confusing?
• HowTo:Make a Band: ...that making a band usually involves frantically begging family and strangers to join?
• HowTo:Smell a Bit Like Fish: ...that smelling like a fish can greatly improve your life?
• Internet Movie Database: ...that for the sake of secrecy, the film Internet Movie Database was shipped in canisters marked Land Before Time 9?
• Dear John letter: ...that someone should send John Deere a Dear John letter?
• Henchmen: ...that typical henchmen will never overthrow their evil boss?
• The Vagina Monologues
• 001: ...that each 00 number represents a license to do something nasty? In the case of 007, it's a license to kill. For 001, it's a license to bite someone's ankle.
• UnNews:Stupid kid drowns in pond: ...that kids should be kept away from ponds as they are stupid enough to not know how to swim?
• HowTo:Cheat At Scrabble: ...that there are endless opportunities to cheat at Scrabble?
• UnBooks:Pulp Novel, the case of the dashing dame: ...that Pulp Novel, the case of the dashing dame won a Pulitzer Prize for Pulpish Prose?
• The Annual One-Day-Only Winter Holidays Earlybird 5:00 AM 99% Off Sale: ...that The Annual One-Day-Only Winter Holidays Earlybird 5:00 AM 99% Off Sale is a Christmas Winter Holiday Christmas-oriented sales event unlike any other?
• Prog Rock: ...that progressive rock groups decided to stop writing three-minute songs about sex and instead wrote ten-minute songs about nothing at all?
• The Free World: ...that the world is free, despite what the government says?
• Holocaust Tycoon: ...that you can construct your very own Holocaust?
• Patrick Henry: ...that I, Patrick Henry, was buried at sea a mile and a half northeast of Sapelo Island, in a rising gale with the wind taking the tops off the waves and rain coming horizontal across the bows like birdshot?
• UnNews:TIME magazine names "Person of the Year": Not You: ...that in all likelyhood, you will never do anything important enough to warrant winning Time Magazine's "Person of the Year"?
• New Hampshire Merchant Cat: ...that your cat Fluffy is a racist?
• Garfield: ...that the popular comic strip Garfield is really, really funny? No, really.
• New Cooler Edition: ...that the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles helped save Noah's Ark during the flood?!
  • ...or that Jesus rode a velociraptor into Jerusalem!?
• Commercial Conformity Period: ...that Satan Claus is coming to town?
• Christmas Number Ones: ...that Christmas Number Ones have nothing to do with Yuletide bathroom activity?
• Life's Answerable Questions: ...that this is one of Life's Answerable Questions?
• Conceptual Art: ...that you just don't get Conceptual Art? Even if you think you do, you don't. Just accept it.
• Poof, There It Is Theory: ...that the Poof, There It Is Theory is one of the most popular theories used to explain the creation of the universe?
• Separation Issues: ...that my wife and I are having separation issues, and that she's probably going to get the children and the house?
• First Gradeism: ...that most art critics don't care much for the style of First Gradeism?
• IQ:Sample test: ...that your IQ is 73, and this test proves it?

2007

• Ironing: ...that Ironing blows no matter how much you try to hide it?
• Cow Udders Caught in Barbed Wire: ...that some farmers (and considerably less cattle) find the image of Cow Udders Caught in Barbed Wire to be rather fetching?
• HowTo:Convince People You're a Heterosexual Male: ...that you can stay in the closet for as long as you want?
• Third Epistle to the Thessalonians: ...that unlike the first two epistles to the community at Thessalonika, in which Paul expressed love and support to the Christians in the city while attempting to answer their questions, the apostle completely loses it in the third letter, and liberally sprinkles his escathology with insults like "doofus" and "morons"?
• Alexander the Great: ...that Alexander isn't really that Great?
• My Journeys with the GPS: ...that journeys with GPS always end badly, if not for you then for the GPS?
• UnBooks:The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Drifters: ...that drifters are highly effective at something other than drifting?
• The Wicker Man: ...that The Wicker Man also makes a fabulous deck chair?
• Victorian Era: ...that during the Victorian era, the persecution and brutalization of orphans was considered every Englishman's patriotic duty?
• Limitations of Superpowers as Applies to God: ...that, though nobody is more super than the Christian God, He is definitely limited in His abilities?
• Onomatopoeia: ...that SPLOSH!!! Ker-plop! WOOF! ...........FFFFFOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!?
• Me: ...that my hobbies include dogs, cats and pancakes?
• AAA: ...that 90% of all video game high scores are set by one guy called "AAA"?
• Little Orphan Annie: ...that the sun'll come out tomorrow?
• Witless Protection Program: ...that the Witless Protection Program is a program designed to protect very stupid people from their own stupid acts?
• HowTo:Hold a Handbag Like a Man: ...that holding a handbag like a man can show the world you are not Homosexual?
• Really Big Tree: ...that that is a big fucking tree?!
• Blackbeard Catering Company: ...that the Blackbeard Catering Company often drowned people, vegans, and coeliacs with little provocation?
• HowTo:Run away from home: ...sometimes those running away from home get all sobbing and impatient and bolt straight out the door without preparation?
• UnBooks:Uncyclopedia for Dummies
• Vietnam War Hoax: ...that the Vietnam War never actually happened?
• George W. Bush
• Witch-Hunting For Fun and Profit: ...that Witch-Hunting For Fun and Profit has mostly turned into Witch-Hunting For Fun in this modern era of cheaply produced Chinese assembly line witches?
• Shortcut: ...that the shortest distance between two points is to stomp straight over everything?
• Intelligent Design: ...that God designed testicles just because he thought it would a be laugh riot?
• HowTo:Make Cheesy Sci-Fi: ...that science fiction is just like milk?
  

• ...Sooner or later, it always becomes cheesy?

• List of one letter words starting with A: ...that the list of one letter words starting with A has more than one entry?
• Jihad My Ride: ...that Jihad My Ride is a TV show inspired by MTV's Pimp My Ride and is shown every Saturday evening on al-Jazeera?
• You Are Dead: ...that the things you can do when you are dead include " " and " "?
• League of Nations: ...that the League of Nations was the first and least successful Collegiate football conference?
• Erraticus: ...that the books of Roman Historian Marcus Claudius Erraticus describe several of Caesar's battles as "earth-shattering victories" and "horrific defeats," often in the same sentence?
• Google Middle Earth: ...that Google Middle Earth is a palantir-driven geographical simulation program of Middle Earth? (or) ...that Google Middle Earth is a palantir-driven geographical simulation program created by webmaster/ringlord Sauron and software giant Google?
• Civil War
• Nuremberg Rally: ...that in the Nuremberg Rally everyone wins, except the Jews?
• HowTo:Start a Religion: ...that starting a religion is about three things: location, location, and miracles?
• HowTo:Stop Playing the Accordion: ...that everyone's getting pretty darned annoyed with that accordion-playing of yours?
• UnNews:Al-Qaeda operative spills the beans: ...that Al-Qaeda has expanded their business portfolio to include more than just terrorism?
• HowTo:Live in an RPG: ...that you must wield a Giant Sword against that giant mushroom?
• UnBooks:The Adventures of Baron Ringpiece: ...that shortly after writing The Adventures of Baron Ringpiece, William Thackeray killed himself due to shame?
• Protect and Survive: ...that at any second, of any minute, of any hour, of any day, a massive nuclear bomb could land on your house?

• ...and that the only way to survive is to crouch underneath a radiation-proof desk?

• HowTo:Deliver a Baby, A Concise and Easy-to-follow Guide Developed, Tested, and Approved by the AMA (No, Not that AMA. The Other One) and Reprinted with the Permission of the JAMA (Also a Different One): ...that the oozy, off-colored mound of bloody what-ever-it-is stretching its way out of what used to be a tiny hole is a baby's head? (or) ...that the Virgin Birth is no longer considered a miracle? Women have been giving birth to virgins for centuries!
• Honesty: ...that I cannot tell a lie? Honest.
• Education: ...that I learned everything I know from soap commercials? Now with double the cleansing power!
• UnBooks:Practical Lessons on Communism: ...that under Communism, everyone gets an A?
• Future ☭f tomorrow, today!: ...that this time is great year for Soviet Russia?
• The Porchesian Holocaust: ...that the fate of the luscious island paradise of Porchesia was decided by one called 'Danny' who wiped out the whole island in between ordering groceries and watching videos on YouTube?
• Movie Trailer Announcer Guy: ...that in a world where movie trailers are crucial to a film's success... one man will provide his voice in innumerable trailers?
• Moses: ...that you have probably broken at least three of the Ten Commandments just by visiting this website?
• HowTo:Cook While Drunk
• UnCameron: ...that David Cameron is a pretty straightforward kinda guy, who would love your vote?
• UnNews:Hylian teen arrested for property damage: ...that Link is not a hero?
• UnNews:Boy subjected to harsh criticism, cries like little girl: ...that harsh criticism is indeed very harsh on minors?
• HowTo:Cut Your Own Head Off With a Chainsaw: ...that cutting your own head off with a chainsaw can be quite dangerous, unless certain precautions are taken?
• Mao Zedong: ...that Communist revolutionary Mae Zedong authored the Little Black Book while in power in China?
• UnNews:Overly political spider becoming annoying: ...that Ann Coulter is some pig?
• Is a 1982 Mitsubishi Colt better than a Bugatti Veyron?: ...that the Bugatti Veyron accelerates at an infinite rate, has an infinite top speed, and can easily take 180 degree corners at any speed without losing any grip?

• ...that, likewise, sitting in the Veyron is the most comfortable thing a human can possibly experience?

• Dyslexia: ...Ttha dilysexia si o trubuil nerlojkl dis ordor taht mins y cannt rede gude.
• UnBooks:Choose Your Own Adventure: ...that YOU are the hero of this story?
• Good cop/Bad cop: ...that a GIGN officer will shoot terrorists, then help them... then shoot them... then help them?
• Alcoholics Anonymous: ...that only half of Alcoholics really are anonymous, the rest just think they are?
• 1846 Uncyclopedia Convention at Aurora, New York: ...that many future Uncyclopedia editors were conceived at the 1846 Uncyclopedia Convention at Aurora, New York, including Oscar Wilde?
• The Aeneid: A Research Paper About the Aeneid: ...that a lot could be said about the Aeneid, about how important it is, about how well-written it is, and about how longing and forboding a text it could be, but I will not say these things, as they are things a person who did not read the Aeneid would say, and as I obviously have read the Aeneid, I won't have any trouble with this report?
• Tachyon: ...that a tachyon is a subatomic particle formed when a gluon is pimped out by some righteous mo'fo's in a subatomic workshop?
• UnBooks:Dracula: ...zat I cannot tell you off ze bewk called Dracula, because I do not read... fiction?
• The Beatles: Ecological Number Ones: ...that she loves you, yeah, yeah, yeah?
• Baby Seal: ...that baby seal is a popular dish in some western countries?
• Grue's Clues: ...that the rocking carcass in the corner is a clue?
• HowTo:Construct a Federation Starship: ...that constructing a Federation Starship is hard work, and is not for the non-geeks?
• One Out of Ten Doctors: ...that four out of ten lawyers say that one out of ten doctors is likely to sexually assault three out of seven female patients?
• Newspeak
• African giraffe: ...that an African giraffe is about to run you the fuck down?
• What I Did On My Summer Vacation: ...that what you did on your summer vacation is of no interest to me, mom?
• HowTo:Write A Thesis Statement: ...that you can get a supreme taco from Taco Bell for only $1.99?
• Adolf Hitler: ...that Adolf Hitler was most famous for his art and acting talents, as displayed throughout his life and during the European World Tour 1939-1945, when he liberated Poland from Jewish influence, liberated France from incompetent rulers, and liberated Austria from itself?
• The Consumerist: ...that The Consumerist will steal your wallet if you're not careful?
• Ye Olde Webbe Desyne Shoppe: ...that in the old days, we had to make our own 'web' which was a lot smaller than 'world-wide', and demanded skilled workmanship and dedication in order to work properly?
• UnNews:Barbie robs bank, further pads résumé: ...that former child icon Barbie has nearly hit rock bottom after a recent bank heist?
• Walgreens Drug Store: ...that Walgreens Drug Store has a different definition of 'Drug' than I do, and apparently the police hold to this same definition?
• Martina Hingis: ...that Martina Hingis won't return my calls? Please call me.
• Merde, She Wrote: ...that Merde, She Wrote is an authentic Latin situ-drama?
• Uluru: ...that some people find a giant red piece of papier-mâché rock interesting?
• Women
• Why?:Am I in Canada?: ...that people residing or visiting Canada often ask themselves, "Why am I in Canada?"
• HowTo:Be At One With The Universe: ...that being at one with the universe is fun, healthy and good for you?
• Charles Dickens: ...Charles Dickens peened several manuscripts which went later on in time to age into successful novels, many of which are a staple in literature across the known and literate global audience?
• Strongly worded letter: ...that in a strongly worded letter, I told that prick to right fuck off with a letter opener?
• UnNews:Local cancer loses battle with woman: ...that Acute Promyelocytic Leukemia, a hematological neoplasm known as "Neo" to his friends, succumbed to local resident Cori Porter after a long battle with chemotherapy this evening?
• Wallet moth
• UnNews:Bush sautes Tuskegee Airmen: ...that president Bush prefers his Tuskegee airmen with a side of risotto and mushrooms?
• Slate industry in Wales: ...that the slate industry in Wales originated in Roman times, when the Romans decided that they were tired of just publicly flogging Welsh people and decided to instead have them dig huge rocks out of the ground?
• Waltzing Matilda: ...that a medium-sized Australian jumbuck can easily fit into most standard-issue tuckerbags?
• UnNews:Google, Inc. Employee: "My Job Blows"; Apple, Inc. Employee: "My Job Sucks": ...that working at Google blows, while working at Apple sucks?
• UnNews:Scientists make a sheep-human hybrid, bestiality enthusiasts pleased: ...that bestiality just got 15 percent more legal?
• Byzantine Empire: ...that the Byzantine Empire is just a cheap rip-off of the Roman Empire?
• Homeless nerds: ...that homeless nerds, found in every major city, can be identified by their thick-rimmed glasses, tattered laptop cases, and plastic bags full of assorted cables and surge protectors?
• The Life and Times of Kraft Dinner: ...that there are 34 cuts in the deceased racing horse Kraft Dinner?
• Colonel: ...that Colonel Sir Wilfred Fitzpimlico, an aide-de-camp to the Duke of Wellington, led the famous "I say, look here" charge at the Battle of Talavera?
• Artificial Pseudoscientology: ...that Artificial Pseudoscientology is really about the children?
• Rock, Paper, Airstrike: ...that paper beats rock, but airstrike beats paper?
• Mahmoud Ahmadinejad: ...that Mahmoud Ahmadinejad really does believe in a Holocaust -- in his pants?
• UnBooks:Panic on the Streets of Birmingham: Zombie Chaos and Civil Rights in the Sixties: ...that during the most tumultuous time in United States history since the Civil War, a time when zombie hordes were breaking in on Freedom Riders and gentle sit-ins, a time when the President told the nation “The fires of frustration and discord are burning in every city,” we strove, we organized and we fought back?
• HowTo:Bluff Your Way to Political Power: ...that this article is the official Republican party playbook?
• Everybody cares: ...that Everybody cares about your boring, inconsequential, pedestrian, already-traipsed life?
• Stephen Hawking ran over my cat: ...that Stephen Hawking ran over my cat?
• British class system: ...that the British Upper Class is not just a class - they are in fact a distinct species?
• HowTo:Run Away From Fat Ladies: ...that fat ladies are best avoided?
• HowTo:Prevent your car radio from being stolen: ...that having your car radio stolen will be very, very, painful?
• John Caldwell Calhoun: ...that John Caldwell Calhoun overcame prejudice to become a successful politician in spite of being really fucking creepy looking? I mean seriously creepy. Brrr.
• The Black And White Man: ...that Superheros have a new face, and it's bi-racial?
• Austria-Hungary: ...that Austria-Hungary was created as a drunken bet in 1867 when the Habsburg Emperor Franz Joseph was forced to bet his country's name after losing all his gold sovereigns to Napoleon III?
• Idea: ...that an idea is indicated by the presence of a light source above a person's head? This usually tends to be a lightbulb but can also take the form of mildly radioactive fan heaters, electric torches or even internally lit large exclamation marks, a method pioneered by one Felix T Catt.
• UnNews:Noob Gets PWNED: ...that, in a shocking turn of events, a noob got PWNED?
• UnNews:New Borg drone complains about management: ...that the Borg have a really shitty personnel department?
• UnBooks:The Anarchist Cookbook: ...that the The Anarchist Cookbook is also known as the Bakunin Culinary Hand Guide and Souffle Compendium?
• Escher: ...that The Fall of the House of Escher is a short story by Edgar Allen Poe?
• UnScripts:The UnUsual Suspects: ...that the greatest trick Christopher Robin ever pulled was convincing Hundred Acre Wood that he didn't exist?
• Grand Theft Audio: ...that the RIAA's edutainment title Grand Theft Audio was released for online download January 3, 2007, and accumulated over 5000 downloads within 24 hours of being leaked on BitTorrent?
• Evolution of an Uncyclopedia editor: ...that the Evolution of the Uncyclopedia Editor disproves the theory of Intelligent Editing?
• Ecky-Thump: ...that only 1 in 5 people even know what Ecky-Thump means, and you are not that person?
• Lord of the Flies: ...that Piggy's glasses get broken?
• UnBooks:Diary of a Caveman: ...that Diary of a Caveman: The musings of one humble hunter slash gatherer, condensed and organized hereto in journal form, recounting the passing days of one man's struggle against the mundane, and his second hand account of the lives of his friends and family in the Upper Paleolithic age was considered "a good nice tour de brute force" by What's New in Wordbook Review?
• UnBooks:Gallows Humor: ...that nothing gets you through a day of nonstop executions than a nice slice of pumpkin pie?
• UnBooks:Now That You Are Almost a Woman: ...that you are undergoing a special metamorphosis, like one of those really ugly caterpillars that will one day turn into a beautiful butterfly?
• UnNews:Vodka industry in turmoil following Yeltsin's death: ...that the vodka industry really misses Boris Yeltsin?
• Blandford: ...that Blandford is a pleasant and peaceful place where not much has changed since 1957, the start of what I like to call 'the great pleasantness decline'?
• UnNews:Small children may have unrealistic goals: ...that small children may have unrealistic goals?
• Screenwriting: ...that most screenwriting efforts end in vain?
• UnNews:People leaving the Matrix in droves after red pill mix-up: ...that escaping from the Matrix is the best way to avoid seeing Reloaded or Revolutions?
• Fat Albert: ...that Fat Albert ran on CBS for 12 seasons before it was eclipsed by JAG, in an attempt to rope in younger viewers?
• Illegal aliens from outer space!: ...that illegal aliens from outer space want your job, and your wife?
• Folgers Crystals: ...that scoring 7 or 8 'rocks' of Folgers Crystals can put you in heaven for 24 hours?
• Global Cooling: ...that Global Cooling is good news for those of who just got a pizza out of the oven?
• My Chemical Romance: ...that laboratory safety protocol said no, but my heart said yes?
• Letter to the Isle: ...that America is better than Britain in every single way?
• HowTo:Set Up a Party at the Last Minute: ...that today's the Super Bowl, and you totally fucking forgot to set up the party?
• Dictation: ...that Dick-tay-shun is M-port-ant?
• Sperm: ...that Sperm are like hippies: they all stink, all of them are the same, but we can't just have enough of them?
• Anime: ...that animo acids are violent, sword-sporting little devils?
• Saint Frankenstein's Day: ...that giving gifts of genetically engineered flowers that feed on human blood is a popular Saint Frankenstein's Day tradition?
• TONIGHT, WE DINE IN HELL: ...that tonight we dine in Hell?
• UnNews:Geology classes in Alabama now mandating alternative "Paul Bunyan" theory: ...that faith in Paul Bunyan is the only thing that can save you from a one way ticket to Hell?
• Ganges: ...that the Ganges deeply resents the Nile, that arrogant bastard?
• Moustache-o-meter: ...that the Moustache-o-meter is a ratings system utilising the virility and masculinity of the male upper-lip embellishment known as the moustache?
• Nazi: ...that the Order of the Nazi was an order of chivalry whose admission policies were nearly impossible for anyone that was not of the Aryan race?
• Mad TV: ...that you're an idiot if you think SNL is better than Mad TV?
• Socratic method: ...that asking 'Did You Know' perfectly suits the nature of the Socratic Method?
• Mr. Kearsy: ...that Mr. Kearsy is seriously the most rockin' teacher in the whole freakin' universe?!
• HowTo:Be a Jehovah's Witness: ...that you should accept Jesus Christ as your personal savior, today!
• Kitchen sink: ...that rigorous philosophical inquiry has led many to the conclusion that mankind can never truly have everything and the kitchen sink?
• HowTo:Turn Your Computer On: ...that it takes a great amount of sexual commitment to get a computer turned on, but once your computer is properly aroused, it can offer you some of the greatest sexual thrills you may ever experience?
• Film noir: ...that Jimmy the Shoeshine Boy told me there's an article around here about Film Noir?
• Obsessive-compulsive rhyming disorder: ...that Obsessive-compulsive rhyming disorder will make us all poets, and we won't know it?
• Old McDonald: ...that Old McDonald contributed to wage depression by hiring illegals to pick tomatoes in his farm?
• Why?:Pour Boiling Hot Water Down Your Trousers?: ...that the amazing sensation of excruciatingly warm liquid on the genitals is just one of many reasons to pour boiling hot water down your trousers?
• UnNews:Christianity hoax exposed; bogus belief system baffles western civilization for 2,000 years: ...that the Pope recently announced that the whole "Christianity" thing is a whole load of shit?
• UnNews:Florida flooded by global warming, Sea World ironically left above water: ...that global warming is not a hoax? (or) ...that Shamu the whale is a retard?
• The Lake District: ...that there is nothing impressive about The Lake District?
• Preflight procedures: ...that if we lose cabin pressure, masks will drop from just above your head?

• ...and darn it, I always get the Richard Nixon mask!

• UnScripts:The Meeting: A Play in One Act: ...that The Meeting was turned into a Tony Award Wining Musical, headlined by Tommy Lee Jones and Matthew Broderick?
• ITrip: ...that the iTrip was invented by Bob Geldof to allow children to experience being on drugs while remaining sober?
• Is This Some Kind of Fucking Joke?!: ...that, yes, this is some kind of fucking joke?
• United States presidential election, 1948: ...that the United States presidential election of 1948 saw the overwhelming defeat of then-President Harry S. Truman at the hands of Thomas Dewey, the Republican governor of New York and former partner in the law firm, Dewey, Cheatem & Howe?
• Hoboeroticism: ...that the fetish of being attracted to homeless people is known as Hoboeroticism?
• UnNews:Your grandma might be Al-Qaeda: ...that your grandma might be Al-Qaeda?
• A Visit with your Psychopathic Grandmother: ...that she's the sweetest insane psychopath you'll ever meet?
• UnNews:Bashing your head against a brick wall discovered to have hallucinogenic effects: ...that, due to a lack of resources, a North Carolinian discovered that, by bashing one's head against a wall, they can experience being on drugs?
• Bipolar bear: ...that bipolar bears are not to be messed with, more-so than polar bears?
• UnBooks:Mr. Beluncle: ...that when one understands the Holy Mind all imperfection is seen to be error?

• ...and therefore it is error to think that your hand has just been sliced off at the wrist?

• UnNews:Procrastinators Unite Today; Shirt Enthusiasts Enraged: ...that all hell broke loose when procrastinators united today?
• UnNews:6-year-old boy receives $20,000 in government subsidies for insect torture research: ...that insect torture is a good way for your child to earn money?
• UnBooks:Only Business: ...that I don’t hate you; I just have to put an ice axe in your head, in the nicest way possible?
• HowTo:Feng Shui Your Computer: ...that the science of Feng Shui has long been a favoured methodology within the business sector, but over the last ten years it has come to be accepted as fundamental to the smooth running of the IT industry?
• Old hippie chick who's always collecting money: ...that the old hippie chick who’s always collecting money for some wacky cause or other is heading to your front door at this very minute?
• HowTo:Beat the Odds
• Commercial: ... that HeadOn, apply directly to the forehead? HeadOn, apply directly to the forehead? HeadOn, apply directly to the forehead?
• Vulva: ...that the most common type of Vulva seen on the road is the family model, which fathers like to drive as much as possible, but rarely get to except on some weekends and the occasional birthday or anniversary?
• Cup stacking: ...that Cup Stacking is a real sport? No, really. (or) ...that Cup stacking is fun for about 5 minutes?
• 667:Neighbor of The Beast: ...that Satan really isn't that bad, once you get to know him? (or) ...that the popular sitcom 667:Neighbor of The Beast was especially loved by mothers who wanted their children to "be more like that Satan"?
• Bathroom humor: ...that bathroom humor originated in the late 20th century, but it's hard to imagine that chamber pots didn't have a good chuckle now and then?
• UnBooks:The World According to Garm: ...that I keep telling Hraesvelg I, Garm, not pet, but stupid giant never listens?
• HowTo:Be a Gangsta: ...that the hardest thing about becoming a gangsta is getting into a gang?
• UnNews:Poor planning ruins Rapture: ...that on 3 July 2007, millions of pious Christians were partially Raptured into Heaven, piece by piece?
• Geocaching: ...that Geocaching is an outdoor adventure and treasure-hunting game in which the participants utilize navigational techniques to identify valuable land, then leverage national tactics of force, covert ops, biological warfare, and/or other military techniques to obtain the land from the owners?
• The Diary of Anne Frank: ...that Annefrankhuis currently generates in excess of 30% of Holland's tourism income, overtaking the tulip and whorehouse industries to become the primary source of income for the whole country?
• Oscar Wilde
• But Seriously...: ...that being very serious is the only topic that cannot be joked about?
• Thomas Edison: ...that Thomas Edison was arrested on charges of pornography following the release of his short film, Woman Whose Ankle is Partly Visible?
• Why?:Put Down the Duckie?: ...that the Saxophone-Duckie Dilemma is a philosophical problem that asks one whether it is better to eshew physical possession of the duckie, in order to gain the ability to play the saxophone?
• Bow tie: ...that the bow-tie is an aphrodisiac worn by male humans which instantly increases the sexual appeal of the wearer by 16%?
• UnNews:For Dummies author earns PhD
• Pufflebump Snugglekins: ...that pufflebump snugglekins is the bestest teddy bear evar in the world and my bestest friend!!
• Pair of Dice by the Dashboard Light: ...that pairs of dice hanging by dashboard lights are secret devices planted by overprotective parents wishing to monitor their teenage children when they go on car dates? No, really.
• UnNews:Homeland Security administration declares new "Gut Feeling" threat level: ...that according to Dutch Girl Paints, “Bile” is a yellowish-greenish-brownish color, on line with vomit, but a bit more sour?
• UnBooks:Employee Manual: ...that the McDonalds rule is: as long as it looks like a hamburger, they'll eat it?
• Cowboy Bebop: ...that this article contains the spoiler that Spike dies?

• ...that if you don't want to find out that Spike dies (which he does), don't read that article, or the previous sentence?

• HowTo:Play Russian Roulette: ...that when played solo, a typical game of Russian Roulette is completed in, at most, six easy steps?
• Atomic Mass: ...that Christian Scientists did not have a standardized Sunday service, prior to the introduction of the Atomic Mass?
• Dead Nigger Storage: ...that many individuals have struggled with the issue of dead nigger storage, including Jefferson Davis and John C. Calhoun?
• Raoul Duke: ...that I'd been sipping a mint julep at the poolside cantina when I finally realized that you'd gone off on another harebrained adventure into some uncharted territory never intended for the presence of man?
• UnBooks:The Secret Origins of Cream; Supergroup: ...that you think you've heard about Cream; Supergroup, but what do you really know?
• Heavy Classical: ...that a Heavy Classical recording of "Handel's Water Music" would be called "Handel's Smoke on the Water Music"?
• Long walks on the beach: ...that there’s nothing I enjoy more than long walks on the beach?
• HowTo:Bend a spoon
• EXPLODE!!!: ...that the 2004 video game "EXPLODE!!!" was given the "Tommy Tallarico Best Game Ever" award due to the fact that you can "blow up fire hydrants and dentists"?
• Easter Bunny: ...that as the Easter holiday focuses on the brutal death and inexplicable rebirth of Jesus Christ, so too does tradition dictate the slaying of a rabbit?
• Game:Pick Up the Phone Booth and Aisle: ...that you've had a hard day and the last thing you need is this: shopping?
• UnNews:Stuffy intellectuals discover internet memes: ... that apparently, this Charles Norris fellow is quite the ruffian?
• UnNews:Rain falls on United Kingdom: ... that on 17 June 2007, Britain was mercilessly hit by an attack of 'falling water'?
• UnNews:New thing called wheel make move mud less hard: ... that new thing called wheel make move mud less hard?
• UnNews:Defenseless Hummer viciously attacked by Eco-Nazis: ... that the best way to express your environmentalist opinions is to vandalize a nearby Hummer?
• HowTo:Check for Lumps: ... that the Unofficial Knownothing Dictionary defines a lump as "A raised, fleshy area on the skin, that often gives cause for extreme panic and tends to result in instant death. Typically found in places nobody wants to look"?
• Russian reversal (phenomenon): ...that the Russian Reversal is the common English term for the phenomenon during which a person descended from Russia is spontaneously turned around?
• UnScripts:Grass in the Mist: ...that Grass in the Mist is a compilation of actual footage taken by nature enthusiast Skippy Leadwell on his voyage to the African savanna to study the complex social patterns of East African grass?
• Blue Screen of Death: ...that the "écran bleu de la mort" is the origin of the phrase "sacre bleu"?
• UnNews:Monogamy in Utah upsets economy: ...that I don't believe it's in the realm of good taste to take only one wife?
• Diplomacy: ...that a hammer is a great diplomatic tool?

• ...although on an international level, a nuclear arsenal is even better?

• Why?:Collapse Space-Time: ...that the universe is conspiring against you?
• UnNews:Chancellor committed to preemptive war: ...that the head of the National Socialist German Workers Party announced yesterday a plan to free Deutschland from the threat of a militarized Poland?
• Jewish Holidays: ...that one of the Jewish holidays is based on a combination of bad Greek temper, deep fried pastries and a never-ending can of olive oil?
• Ode to the Monotony of Life: ...that to the untrained ear, John Aglethorpe's Ode to the Monotony of Life may simply sound like one continuous, monotonous tone, but the song is actually composed mostly of alterations between the A sharp and B flat notes tied together?
• UnBooks:The Castaway: ...that if your best friend is a volleyball, you're probably insane?
• UnScripts:The O'Finnertys
• Teenage angst: ...that I'm vaguely upset but I've no idea why?
• UnNews:Hitting children found to have positive effects on brain development: ...that hitting your kids may be beneficial to their health, or at the very least amusing to you?
• Why?:Remove Your Penis: ...that removing your penis is fun, easy, effective, and borderline safe? (or) ...that it's time to get your penis removed?
• HowTo:Hotwire a Uterus
• Holy Cheese
• Social Commentary
• UnNews:New writing technique good for some, bad for others: ...taht wrods and snetnces are raedalbe eevn wehn tehy are toatlly fckued up?
• D: ...that the letter D has a long and illustrious history, though it currently exists in a state of mediocrity?
• Maginot Line
• Fire Hydrant 2: Rehydrated: ...that "Where's the fire, baby?" is widely considered to be the most annoying movie catchphrase ever?
• Walls: ...that walls hold up the ceiling?

• ...that walls will most likely continue to hold ceilings in the civilized world for the foreseeable future?

• UnScripts:Dora the Explorer: The Movie: ...that the Dora the Explorer made-for-TV movie was a complete and utter ratings disaster? (pictured)
• UnBooks:Coming of Age Tale: ...that coming of age is bound to have some adverse effect on your innocence and naiveté? (or) ...that this section, though actually named Did You Know?, which attempts to give you factoids and tidbits about things you may or may not have been aware of, or known, is actually, by curious subliminal messaging wherein the sublime mind is taken and twisted to the will of the creator of the aforementioned section, advertising articles for you to read?
• Pillow fighting: ...that pillow fighting is a violent trend among the world's pillow population, and must be stopped?
• HowTo:Deceive people on eBay: ...that making loads of money is easier than you think?
• UnNews:Topeka, Kansas is proclaimed "Whaling Capital of the USA": ...that whaling is hugely popular in Kansas?
• Volcano: ...that Volcanoes are annoying little attention whores?
• Hodgepodge: ...that L. Ron Hubbard's greatest discovery wasn't Scientology?
• DOHS Anti-Terrorism Regulations: ...that your chances of remaining medically alive after a terrorist attack increase by up to 4% upon reading the Department of Homeland Security's Guide To Surviving A Terrorist Attack?
• Chuck Norris
• UnBooks:Tuesdays with Maury
• Carry On Films: ...that Hattie Jacques has huge knockers?
• Down with this sort of thing!: ...that this sort of thing has got to stop!

• ...that is, if that's all right with you, sir.

• UnNews:Bro-on-bro taser violence reaches all-time high
• Sergei Rachmaninoff: ...that Sergei Rachmaninoff wants to destroy your fingers beyond repair with his music?
• UnScripts:Feel Good Sports Movie: ...that the original feel-good sports movie has never been seen, but is instead used as the primary material in "Easy Money 101" classes?
• Why?:Nuke the whales: ...that we must nuke the whales, or the hippies will win?
• Innovations in Comedy: ...that Ben Stiller makes everything funny?
• HowTo:Stop Being a Nerd: ...that you can stop being a nerd? (or) ...that those glasses really don't suit you?
• UnNews:The White House discovered to be off-white!: ...that the White House is really off-white?
• UnMysteries:J'accuse: ...that the butler did it?
• Stupendous Tropical Meningitis Vaccination A: ...that Stupendous Tropical Meningitis Vaccination A, the sister drug to Stupendous Tropical Meningitis Vaccination B, is very effective against Stupendous Tropical Meningitis? (or) ...that Stupendous Tropical Meningitis Vaccination A is one of two vaccinations (Stupendous Tropical Meningitis Vaccination A and Stupendous Tropical Meningitis Vaccination B) that vaccinate people for the Stupendous Tropical Meningitis virus, but Stupendous Tropical Meningitis Vaccination A is slightly more effective on Stupendous Tropical Meningitis than Stupendous Tropical Meningitis Vaccination B?
• HowTo:Throw a temper tantrum
• UnNews:Studies show people who read are better at reading: ...that people who read are better at reading than those who don't?
• UnNews:Al Qaeda goes green; all attacks to be "carbon neutral": ...that Al-Qaeda is to offset all of its attacks by planting trees?
• The Destiniad
• Mental illness: ...that they have the nerve to put me into this funny farm, then force me to stay? I'll show them! I'll show them all! Mheh mheh mheh!
• UnBooks:Dane Cook: An Unauthorized Autobiography, 2nd Edition (New Pictures): ...that Dane Cook will punch you right in the fucking balls given the chance? (or) ...that there's, like, this thing called a did you know section, and your like "NO, I FUCKING DIDN'T KNOW, THANK YOU FOR FUCKING POINTING THAT OUT!" And it's just like "" because it's a section and you just want to kick it RIGHT IN THE FUCKING BALLS?
• Godzilla vs. Urethra: ...that one of the Godzilla movies placed the famous monster in a cockfight?
• Shopping list: ...that shopping lists are written in a secret code known only to one half of a couple?

• ...with the aim being to force the other half to admit to being an abject failure?

• UnNews:Iran to invade Iran: ...that Iran is all set to invade itself?
• UnBooks:Instant Messaging Translation Guide for 19th Century English Gentlemen: ...that I am wracked with such hearty guffaws that on addition to rolling to and fro on the floor, my posterior has separated itself from my body?
• UnNews:Anti-genocide group announces new plan to get American government to intervene in Darfur
• UnNews:5th period Chemistry sub is a total bitch: ...that my 5th period Chemistry sub is, like, a total bitch?
• Hanna Montana
• Red light: ...that you shouldn't have beaten your kids, disgraced your mother, thought those thoughts, abused your Xanax, killed that hobo, been a cannibal, and driven that fast?
• UnNews:Bin Laden releases new video, America responds with indifference: ...that Osama is a has-been?
• HowTo:Be safe with guns: ...that being safe with guns is- *BANG*
• Buster Keaton
• Right arrow: ...that even though a right arrow seems harmless enough, one killed my friend's mom?
• Sweatshop: ...that you can get great deals on Vietnamese clothing imports if you buy now?
• UnNews:Doctors find cure for weight loss: ...that it is now possible to cure weight loss?
• Toaster: ...that in the Mesozoic Era, toasters ruled the earth?
• Short story
• Time travel
• 4'33": ...
• Celebrity Manufacture
• UnNews:Nelson Mandela dies at age 88
• UnNews:Gandhi posthumously accused of mass genocide: ...that Gandhi is actually a mass murderer?
• Holocaust denial denial: ...that Holocaust denial never happened?
• American (species)
• Books never written: ...that the final manuscript of Reducing Human Stupidity For Dummies was simply too difficult for the author to complete?
• Time Cubicle: ...that your Queer Jew God has a Queer Jew Bod?
• Why?:Cancer is Great: ...that ten out of ten cigarette manufacturers agree that Cancer is great?
• Heat death of the universe: ...that in only 10¹²⁰ years' time, WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE?!
• Classy
• UnNews:Man discovers that he lacks a brain
• Little boy who lives down the street
• Rebecca Sealfon
• UnBooks:Science Fair: ...that sufficiently advanced magic is indistinguishable from science?
• UnNews:my son makes the play of the game: ...that that's my boy, right there?
• HowTo:Fuck Off: ...that fucking off is a highly complex act, and not to be undertaken lightly?
• UnNews:Record percentage of children to dress up as mortgage foreclosure bankers this Halloween: ...that mortgage foreclosure bankers are officially scarier than vampires?
• Uncyclopedia Department of Tourism: ...that you could really do with a holiday this year? Seriously, 18-hour work days aren't healthy.
• Power Rangers
• Society for the Intervention and Rehabilitation of Supervillains
• Simeon I: ...that Simeon I is absolutely no fun at a party?
• UnBooks:IRAQATTACK: ...that his fingers were typing "IRAQATTACK!!!11!!1!", but his heart was saying "Why does everyone hate me?"
• The Enigmatic Mr. Grumpikins
• UnNews:Local men secure enough in masculinity to fuck other men: ...that sex with another man is the ultimate test of one's masculinity?
• How much can YOU take!!
• Why?:Destroy the Rainforest: ...that it's now even easier to do your part for global warming?
• Top Hat: ...that wearing a Top Hat is not only a sound fashion choice, it gives you somewhere to hide candy?
• UnNews:Kids still fucking: ..that students who take part in sexual abstinence programs are just as likely to have sex as those who skipped the class to go make out behind the bleachers?
• Drunk Olympics: ...that the Olympics is far more entertaining when all of the athletes are completely legless?
• Constipation: ...that there are five stages of constipation?

• ...the last one is "acceptance".

• Jaws did WTC: ...that there's more to the 9/11 attacks than the conspiracy theorists would have you believe?

• ...like, way more?

• UnNews:Choice of which product to buy last vestige of freedom for most Americans: ...that only through brand awareness can we truly be free?
• UnTunes:Middle-Aged Suburban White Guy Rap
• Francis Winkler: ...that Francis Winkler is just a poor hapless teacher with homosexuality issues?
• UnBooks:Honest Jim's Miracle Tonic: ...that this here Miracle Tonic will cure what ails ya?
• The Color Problem
• Star Wars: ...that someone already made a popular movie that was set a long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away?
• Why?:Hunt Unicorns: ...that those lousy unicorns think they're better than you?
• Grandpa's Stories: ...that back in my day, we didn't have no fancy Did you know sections on our wikis? We had to get all of our factoids from the library, like decent folk! And after we walked there barefoot across three counties 'cause bicycles hadn't been invented yet, we had to teach ourselves how to read the books - none of that fancy free-contents education you kids're all on about...
• Harry Houdini: ...that Harry Houdini was... hey, where'd he go?
• Shrek!: ...that William Steig was a literary genius?
• UnBooks:The Hell's Chicken Showdown of 1993: ...that Yanni did more than just make music and be sexy?
• Normal: ...that I am a perfectly normal guy WHO IS OF NO INTEREST TO THE AUTHORITIES?
• Self-toasting bread: ...that the same scientists that invented self-toasting bread are currently developing self-boiling coffee?
• UnCon
• The Poor: ...that I have some great recipes for population control?
• UnNews:Liberal insurrection heroically crushed
• Alaska: *...that Alaska is a mooseocracy, in which citizens select a moose to lead them?

• ...that bears have been known to challenge for the role of Alaska's leader?

• UnScripts:Emergency Room: ...that FOX Network's answer to ER was deemed too boring for television because it was too accurate?
• Donner
• United States presidential election, 1840: ...that nominating someone for Vice President just because his name fits into a catchy political slogan isn't really the best way to go about choosing the nation's spare tire?
• United States presidential election, 1960: ...that the 1960 electoral college was so dysfunctional that it makes the 2000 electoral college look like nothing more than an attention-seeking drama queen by comparison?
• Hypocrites: ...that me and the RSPCA are really digging this venison?
• Literary dedications: ...that we're dedicating this sentence to you, mum, because where would we be without your micromanaging everything we did?
• UnNews:Massachusetts school's winter break renamed to please all religions
• Why?:Stick Things in the Electrical Outlet: ...that Einstein hairdos are in this season?
• HowTo:Commit the Perfect Murder
• Why?:Give Up: ...that at some point, hanging in there just makes you look like an even bigger loser?
• Alliance of Motion Picture and Television Producers
• Why?:Read a Book
• Manfred von Richthofen: ...that a fighter pilot named "Snoopy" was the Red Baron's greatest rival during World War I?

2008

• HowTo:Mail a Letter
• Thomas Hardy
• A bunch of aristocrats fucking. Awesome vid
• Academia
• HowTo:Hear a Picture
• UnBooks:Vincent Van Gogh's Things To Do on a Rainy Afternoon
• UnNews:Tobacco picketing found to be addictive
• Bacon and Cheese Sandwich of 1905
• I don't appreciate your attitude towards my potato chip situation
• Why?:Save the mooses?
• Alien vs. Predator
• Why?:Use a wooden condom
• Humanity: A Retrospective
• UnNews:Strange "white stuff" falls from sky, America baffled
• Break Up Letter
• UnPoetia:Show Me Your Tits!
• UnTunes:I Am The Very Model of a Crazy Fundamentalist
• Thermopylae
• United Nations Charter
• UnNews:Six Flags to sell severed legs in gift shop
• UnBooks:Fischer Price
• UnBooks:Surgical Phone
• Why?:Have Humongous Breasts
• Pacific War
• UnScripts:Grass in the Mist II
• Much Ado About Nothing
• UnNews:You Are Reading This Headline; About To Click On It
• Hong Kong Feng Shui
• Thomas Aquinas
• UnBooks:James Brown's Chicken Soup for the Soul
• HowTo:Play the Skin Flute
• EPIC FAIL!
• Rough Pubs
• UnBooks:Gone With d' Wind
• Uncyclopedia Health Service
• If you loved THAT, you’ll love THIS
• Truthful Vending GmbH
• Dude
• Why?:Does Christopher Meloni not have an emmy yet?
• I lost your pet ferret
• Marie Curie
• Just pennies a day
• March of the Penguin Brothers
• UnBooks:Life as a 4⅝ Year Old
• UnScripts:The JFK Shootout of 1963
• Why?:Get a tattoo of a tarantula on your face
• The Siege of Bordeaux: ...that the French have lost to every army in history, including a giant snail?
• Polish Inquisition
• In Confidence We Walk: Upton Sinclair's Keynote Speech to the National Writer's Consortium, 1943
• America
• Examples of Bias in Conservapedia
• File 8AO4F: The God Case
• UnBooks:Travel Guide For All Countries
• UnBooks:Official Informational Guide to the 2008 Beijing Olympics Games
• UnBooks:The True Story of: Jimmy and the aliens; based on a true story
• UnScripts:Noah's Ark
• Charles Lindbergh
• All of the Above
• Horatio Hornblower
• UnNews:Survey on apathy cancelled due to lack of interest
• UnBooks:The Tale of Captain Petey Widdershanks Blunderbub Shaleweather Monkeyturtle Johansen III, Buccaneer Extraordinaire
• Conservapedia
• Selective Inbreeding
• Titshugger Penishead McFucknutter
• UnNews:Study reveals 1 in 4 teen girls has an STD; America congratulates teen boys on sexual exploits
• Paris Hilton: ...that more people have been inside Paris Hilton, than in the Hilton in Paris?
• Please delete this page
• HowTo:Show your appreciation for the band Led Zeppelin
• Hyperdrinking
• Scrawlings of The Artist as a Young Drunk
• The Muffin Man: ...the muffin man?
• American Dream
• Edward the Gibbon
• List of people you do not want to come face to face with in a narrow hallway
• Lake Spooky
• Drugs
• Why?:Take Your Fish To Work
• Hillyard & Brickman Corporation
• Homing pigeon
• Main Page
• Stoner High School
• Uncyclopedia:No Reading Articles
• UnScripts:Average Cop
• G Rated Talking Animal Movie
• UnNews:Massive stadium brawl breaks out over contemporary solipsist philosophy
• UnBooks:The Last Little Pig
• UnNews:"Hungry Hungry Hippos" celebrates anniversary
• Why?:Do I have a drug dealer on my buddy list?
• UnScripts:To'Romisha
• Prince and the Revolution
• Ant
• Misquoting Jesus
• Campaign Leaflet
• Otter
• Battle of the Sexes
• UnScripts:Heinous Dan
• UnNews:Joe Schmidt "only good driver in the world!"
• Why?:Buy a Cereal-o-Matic
• Al Capone
• Status Quo
• Why?:Burn a Furby?
• Threads Of Our Existence: Excerpts From the Secret Writing Journal Of F. Scott Fitzgerald
• UnNews:Something Wicked This Way Comes
• Royal Pointless Military Things Tournament
• HowTo:Become Stupid in 21 days
• Cyanide
• Tony Visconti
• Paradise Inc.
• The Daily Show
• UnBooks:USA ROCKS!
• MSN Messenger's Guide to Manners, Proper Behavior and Slapstick
• The Dog Dies at the End
• Pyromaniac
• Mordor Jalapenos
• UnLegends:The Land Where The Sun Shines Not
• Pre-Market Economy
• Defender of the Clown
• Custom Degrees
• Game:Oliver Twist
• UnBooks:Tarquin Middleton: My Battle with Depression.
• World War IV
• Miles Davis
• Scat
• Jerry Falwell
• UnNews:Washed Up 70's Rock Band touring to promote new album
• UnNews:Apocalypse-expecting cultists come out from cave
• Ferdinand von Zeppelin
• Battleship Potemkin
• Why?:Blame Hitler
• Democrazy
• Why?:Trade Your Family's Only Cow For Magic Beans-ene
• Harry S. Truman
• Eurovision Song Contest
• Unidentified man in green firing turret
• Use a Coaster!
• UnScripts:All Mixed Up
• Star Wars (Japanese Opera)
• UnNews:Aftershock from Chinese earthquake knocks over American glass of water in "major tragedy"
• Kitty porn
• Veteran
• The white guy in All-4-One
• HowTo:Pronounce Mahmoud Ahmadinejad
• Public service announcement
• Bubble Wrap
• UnBooks:My New Life as a T-Rex
• Cis-zeatin O-beta-D-glucosyltransferase
• Fuck the world
• Dishwasher
• Pop Bomb
• Perfect Disaster
• Turing Duck Test
• Why?:Won't that damn CD player play my vinyls?
• Japanese High Schools
• HowTo:Write A Funny Band Article
• America is the best!!!
• The Old Country
• Consolation Prize
• UnNews:Irish voters get it all wrong
• UnNews:PBS facing lawsuit after The Count's televised drunken profanity
• Fourth Wall
• The Phallic School of Architecture
• Rafael Nadal
• Guinness Brewmasters
• Erogenous Zones and Difficulties in Overcoming Finding Them
• UnNews:Nature Now Rated NC-17
• Traditional Values
• UnNews:Your family died
• UnBooks:The secret diary of Andrew Murray, aged 20¾
• HowTo:Get Around In A Fighting Tournament
• UnNews:Would-be-hero fatally defeated by common slime
• Thou
• UnBooks:The Night I Slept with Björk
• Hippies: ...that hippies are distinguished by their outtasite vibes, psychedelic drugs, interesting odors, radically long hair, and above all, the tendency to "fight the power"?
• William Gladstone
• Insomnia
• UnBooks:Ill Met By Moonlight
• UnBooks:One Hundred and Seventy Three Haikus About Stuff; Mostly Office Supplies (Annotated And Abridged)
• David Bowie
• UnBooks:A Day In The Life Of A Redirect
• What Would Jesus Do?
• Schindler's Listcruft
• Goldilocks and the Three Bears
• UnBooks:A Story, About a Man, that Comes to an Eventual Conclusion
• Necrophiliphobia
• Two Humps
• Why?:Eat your broccoli
• Hot indiscriminate sex
• HowTo:Write the Great American Novel
• UnBooks:Backstreet Abortionist's Handbook
• Spontaneous Combustion
• HowTo:Learn Guitar
• Awkward Conversation
• Melville the One Trick Pony
• Robert Mugabe
• UnTunes:Monkeys and Footballs
• UnMysteries:A Tissue Of Lies
• Thanks for buying our product! Now, fuck you.
• Taft Punk
• UnScripts:Genesis, Episode II: In the Garden of Eden
• Jew Claw
• HowTo:Turn Your Terminator On
• Everything is great
• Pond Whales
• UnBooks:The Frogs
• Sarah Plain and Tall
• UnNews:Scientists devote massive funds from cancer research to production of an 'orgasmatron'
• Robin Hood
• UnBooks:Beep
• Walpurgis Night
• UnNews:Man forgets 9-11
• UnNews:I have taken hostages
• Lewd Acts of the Apostles
• Pripyat River
• Megadeth
• Playstation 4
• Art That Looks Like Nothing
• Getting pushed into bananas (Mario Kart)
• Lysol
• The Gathering Horror
• Sania Mirza
• Voter Information for the 2008 US Presidential Election
• Physics Act of 1707
• UnNews:Galactic Empire raises terror alert level to orange
• Isaac Newton
• UnBooks:Captain's Blog
• Begging the question
• UnNews:Area 51 opened to public
• How To:Survive a Japanese Game Show
• Why?:Don't You have a Girlfriend Yet?
• UnNews:God Rewrites the Bible
• Universe (musical)
• Laura Ingalls Wilder
• HowTo:Write An Article That Stands No Chance Of Featuring On Uncyclopedia
• UnBooks:Frédéric Chopin's Guide to Better Lawn Care
• Gemini
• UnMovie Review: The Dark Knight
• UnBooks:Who Killed God?
• Color Me Badd
• The Pun Invasion of Uncyclopedia
• UnTunes:White trash girl
• Why?:Am I a Power Ranger?
• Regent University
• UnNews:John McCain calls for War on Bears
• HowTo:Drive a train
• UnScripts:The Symposium
• HowTo:Be A Supervillain
• The Incredible Adventures of MS PAINTMAN!
• HowTo:Hotwire a car
• The Critique of Pure Reason
• HowTo:Boil an egg
• UnNews:The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants angry about misrepresentation in movie
• Are you colour-blind?
• Mousetrap
• Goldfish
• Double Entendre
• UnTunes:Bobby Brown Goes Down (PMRC Edition)
• Interpretive Death
• UnNews:Corrections
• UnBooks:Ronnie James Dio's Big Book of Nursery Rhymes
• Bucephalus
• UnNews:Movie character fails to heed helpful advice
• Get Some Mortgage
• The Men in Blood-Stained Overcoats Who Stay Out of Sight, Waiting For Just the Right Moment
• Faggot
• Gerry Cheevers
• France
• Rule of Three
• Virginia Tech Massacre
• UnBooks:Polar Express
• HowTo:Rob A Bank With Your Penis
• UnBooks:An Uncyc Ban Diary
• Cell biologists are cooler than molecular biologists
• A Guide to Snark Hunting - An Edwardian Gentlemen's Companion
• Rashōmon
• The Bunfight at the OK Corral
• UnNews:Presidential candidates devote all remaining funds to one voter
• Creepy guy who lives across the street
• Grim Reaper: ...that the Grim Reaper really isn't that bad once you get to know him?
• Pontius Pilates
• NASA
• Fish Puns
• UnNews:Infomercial finally convinces area man to pick up phone, call now
• HowTo:Win an Argument
• J'accuzzi
• Marijuana
• Creepy
• A-level
• Enid Blyton
• Observational Comedy
• UnNews:Dewey Defeats Obama
• UnNews:Cancer is racist
• Michael Bay
• HowTo:Love me
• Why?:Is There a Moose On This Plane?
• UnNews:"WWJD?" leads to unfortunate end for local layabout
• UnBooks:Great Abridged Literature
• UnNews:Astronauts starting to suspect no one is coming for them
• Why?:Do I Like Tango and Cash?
• BBC Wireless 4
• Andy Rooney
• Canadians: A Retrospective
• UnNews:Obama selects cabinet, still undecided on bookshelf and coffee table
• Romance novel
• UnNews:Militant atheist decides her car keys never existed
• Physics doesn't exist, it's all about Gnomes
• Golf War
• Pawnography
• Iron Maiden
• Igor
• The Millennium
• ☃
• Jimmy the Cowboy
• UnNews:OJ Simpson found guilty, sentenced to fifteen years in a resort hotel
• UnNews:New Range of Low-Tech Personal Music Players Released

2009

• My visit with Aunt Myfanwy
• Snuggie
• The defense rests, your honor
• UnNews:Jim Carrey to star in Liar Liar 10 Year Anniversary Edition
• Pre-decimal British coinage
• Edvard Munch
• Why?:So Serious?
• Chuck Norris (U.S. accountant)
• The Female Drivers' Guide to the Road (American Version)
• Why?:Is my molten steel bill so high?
• Youth
• UnNews:2008: Year in Review
• UnNews:Recession forces Santa to relocate
• Why?:Do a Pee Review
• UnBooks:The Digital Divide
• Make Poverty History
• Confession (Catholicism)
• Jesus Christ, who brought that guitar?
• Category:My sojourn
• Scary Movie
• Billy Mays
• UnScripts:Song of the South
• Brothel
• UnBooks:So Your Wife Wants To Become A Minister (And Other Solutions To Your Daily Problems)
• Poetry
• Dune
• Give a shit
• UnBooks:Hospital
• Assassins from the future
• HowTo:Be A Damsel In Distress
• Abnormality
• George W. Bush's Weekly Presidential Address: Week of January 25th, 2009
• Elevator: ...that elevators top the list of the most insidious torture devices known to man?
• Colin Powell
• HowTo:Fix the Economy
• Bomb Shelter
• UnNews:Man wakes up
• Creationist Views on Australia: ...that the sky is up and the ground is down, except in Australia where the opposite is true?
• Printer Ink
• Pointless Paradox
• Cardboard Box
• Pie Chart
• Metal Gear Solid
• Star Trek Online
• Allahakbarries
• Amanda Steele, Action Cop
• EDSAC
• UnBooks:Hot Japanese Girls - Colourblind or Unable to Speak English?
• UnBooks:The Lost Introduction to Walden
• UnNews:Point-Counterpoint:Is Obama smart to bring back the era of big government?
• Al Gore
• UnNews:Chuck Norris on secularism: the single greatest threat that America has ever faced
• 21st Century Nazis
• Private Eye
• UnBooks:Travels Through the Tropics
• Hypochondria
• Scatomancy
• UnNews:Recession now affecting time itself; one hour lost Sunday
• Vietnamese dong
• Rush Limbaugh (CPAC speech)
• So you thought that using the Euro as currency would be all fun and games?
• Driving in Bucharest
• UnNews:I Am Not An Al Gore Denier - Richard "Dick" Lindzen
• UnNews:Louisiana Governor brazenly taunts volcanoes
• James Bond (character)
• HowTo:Subsist on an all-OREO® diet for the rest of your life
• Inland Empire
• UnNews:Vampire hunter confused by ancient writings
• Dwight D. Eisenhower
• HowTo:Write Good
• David Lynch
• Neurotic
• Drill sergeant
• World Wildlife Fund
• Metal Gear Solid 2: Sons of Liberty
• Douche
• UnNews:Obama overturns Bush stem cell policy; plans clone of himself
• Lord Sauron
• Baldrick
• Why?:Watching a marathon of House, M.D. while you're sick is not a good idea
• HowTo:Be a Douchebag
• UnNews:Dinesh D'souza on the real problem with Newtonism
• Why?:Hit yourself on the head with a baseball bat seven or eight times
• Dragon Warrior
• MF DOOM
• Economic Collapse Barbie™
• Plink
• Karl Lagerfeld
• Hyper Text Coffee Pot Control Protocol
• HowTo:Get Over Jenny: ...that genocide is a perfectly healthy response to any personal problems you may have?
  • ...and that every person considers it at least once a month?
• Alfred Hitchcock
• Cactus
• You should talk about ponies - A letter to Bill Richardson
• Andrei Tarkovsky
• Ingmar Bergman
• Trogdor the Burninator
• UnMovie Review: Watchmen (with special guests, the Watchmen)
• Hydrogen
• UnNews:Obama unveils education reform plans
• Tradesmen
• Teabag everything that moves
• The fact that you don't want a poodle
• Scrub typhus: the geographic distribution of phenotypic and genotypic variants of Orientia tsutsugamushi
• UnBooks:A Guide to the American Roadside Attraction
• UnNews:Political extremism on the rise in animal world
• Joseph Conrad
• Strategic Stereotypical Australian Reserve
• HowTo:Write Serj Tankian Lyrics
• History of Google
• HowTo:Build the Perfect Sandcastle
• Kingfisher
• UnBooks:American History!
• AIDS (Space Program)

• ...that seal clubbing is a national pastime in Canada? (pictured)
• Robert Shaw
• UnNews:Wolverine hits the big screen
• UnTweets:Mr McElroyLand!
• Gazelle
• Tapheselachophobia
• UnScripts:The Creature of Planet Cheese
• Why?:Don't You Get a Job?
• Kinsey Report No. 3: Sexual Behavior in Hamsters
• Red Lobster
• UnScripts:The Rapid And The Ragey
• Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater
• Unfomercials:Uncyclopedia Krazy Kemistry Set
• HowTo:Be An Honest Crook
• Great Britain
• Free lunch
• Nursery
• UnScripts:The Device
• Albanian interpretationalist cinema
• Oscar the Grouch
• The Bourne Pottery Class
• Claude Debussy
• UnScripts:An interview with an Egyptian taxi driver
• Antbortion: ...that antbortion is an abortive procedure that is highly difficult to perform, but is highly rewarding physically, mentally, and spiritually?
• UnScripts:Unromantic Comedy
• Dear Diary
• UnNews:Spector leaves Republican Party: They're not who I am anymore
• Pat Garrett
• UnTunes:I Like Cats (The Other White Meat)
• UnBooks:Uncyclopedia Brown and Wikipedia Brown solve the mystery of the missing smugglers and their hidden cave or something
• Peyton Manning
• C-3PO
• Akira Kurosawa
• Balloon Animals
• Unquotable:Keanu Reeves
• Prison Break
• Snow White
• British Moon-landing
• Aunt Ginny’s Saturday afternoon lunch at Bob Evans
• Billy Graham
• UnBooks:A Day In the Life of Armond White
• Writing
• UnBooks:Great Abridged Pop Songs
• Boer War
• Lady-Gardening
• Failure University
• Perestroika
• UnNews:Michael Jackson dies! Also Farrah Fawcett
• Childhood: an essay
• History of New England
• UnBooks:The Autobiography of Jesus of Nazareth
• Godzilla
• UnScripts:Heartbeat 2012
• UnTunes:Still Hurting
• HowTo:Survive a Baby
• Jim Jarmusch
• UnTweets:George Peterson
• Mrs. God's blog
• Wild Bill Hickok
• Fan service
• UnNews:The God Interview
• UnNews:Is the Government doing enough to appease the Sun God?
• UnBooks:Daddy, There's a Zombie in the Garden
• LazyTown
• UnScripts:Trapped at Sea
• HowTo:Write a Stephen King Novel
• World of Warcraft
• Joe Namath
• UnBooks:The Nearly-Chaste Mormon's Guide to Quitting Masturbation
• Humphrey Bogart
• The Popularity of War
• Uncyclopedia Madness
• Dungeons & Dragons: Real Life Edition
• UnBooks:Michael Phelps Makes Me Sick
• Xanax
• Stone the Israeli Tank
• The Fat Girl
• Space Invaders
• Five tough life lessons I wouldn't have had to learn if I had listened to Flood by They Might Be Giants

• Yellow
• The Great Gig in the Sky
• Tool (band)
• Crescendo
• Sergio Leone
• Fake announcer voice
• Corn Flakes
• Cheerios
• Kosher Nostra
• Six Hats
• Sherlock Holmes
• Orion
• UnScripts:HMS Potatore
• Clementine Attlee
• Let Someone Else Do It
• Test Match Special
• UnScripts:Star Wars (2010)
• Pious Christians Against Shellfish
• Punk Floyd
• HowTo:Breathe
• Jesus stole my girlfriend
• Guide to a Postmodernist Art Exhibition
• Firefly
• Chutes and Ladders
• What I did on my hols
• The Dice Man
• Quentin Tarantino
• Lyre
• UnBooks:Jonathan Livingston Chicken
• UnScripts:Pixar: An Introduction for Uncyclopedians
• Wikia Inc. Corp. Ltd.
• Psyché
• UnBooks:A Conoisseur's Guide to Dishes on Endangered Species
• UnBooks:An Authentic Journal of Travelers on the Oregon Trail
• Brooke Shields
• The History of the Atom
• Number Bases
• UnNews:Beethoven isn't deaf, he's just ignoring his girlfriend
• Mastodon
• Isaac The Tank Engine
• Godzilla vs. Vaginus
• Barack Obama's Teleprompter
• Disorganised crime
• UnScripts:Les Misérables, Abrégés
• UnScripts:X-Men Origins: Wolverine
• UnNews:Protests erupt as Australia braces for Aimee Mann concert
• The Rubens Diet
• Ark of the Covenant
• The Doctor
• Peter Rabbit Reanimated
• Marble Madness
• UnMysteries:The Mysterious Affair at the World War Two Convention: ...zat I 'ave solved ze case, mon ami?
• Why?:Don't we do it in the road?
• E. E. Cummings
• UnPoetia:An Atheist's Eulogy
• Flash Gordon
• Roak Band - Teutonic Invasion
• Gemeentevervoerbedrijf
• Rich Uncle Pennybags
• Telephone pole
• Plankton
• Why?:Wear clothes 3 sizes too small
• UnBooks:DIY and Carpentry Tips by Jesus Christ
• Rogue States
• The O'Reilly Factor, Tuesday May 13, 1865
• The Asylum-Seeker's Guide to Visiting McDonald's
• Samuel L. Vacuum
• Judaeo-Palaeontology
• 2001: A Space Odyssey
• The Who: My Re-Generation
• Lateral Thinking
• Gas tungsten arc welding
• UnTunes:All You Motherfuckers Are Gonna Pay
• UnNews:Stop dressing like whores, you whores!
• Sun Bee
• Archery
• UnNews:Johnnys a big poopy
• UnNews:Obama shamelessly pushes liberal agenda on schoolchildren
• File sharing
• UnNews:Free in-app commerce is a go on iPhone, oldest profession first to capitalize
• UnScripts:steal Bank Customer Service training video
• The History of the Decline and Fall of Uncyclopedia
• UnNews:Man who claimed to have found God arrested for wasting police time
• Topaz
• United States presidents with ridiculously accentuated facial features
• UnNews:Australia says "You just don't understand our humour!"
• MonsterQuest
• UnScripts:Waiting For Godot 2: Waiting With A Vengeance
• Gonzo journalism
• Love
• UnBooks:Insipid Sentimental Women's Novel
• UnPoetia:The Best Damn Tape Measure in the World
• Street Fighter
• Rod Serling
• The Prisoner (US Remake)
• UnTweets:Osama Bin Laden
• Abraham Lincoln: ...that if Abraham Lincoln was alive today, he would be clawing desperately at the lid of his coffin and screaming for help?
• UnScripts:Starsky and Hutch
• Third-wave feminism
• Jamie Lynn Spears
• Cops Confused at Celtic Carnage
• Alec Baldwin
• Microsoft Knowledge Base
• HowTo:Pick The Perfect Turkey
• Stereotype
• UnBooks:Gone Fishing
• The Pirate Bay
• HowTo:Be Homeless in America
• The Jesus Laws
• Queen Elizabeth I
• The Duke of Edinburgh Award
• Intelligent Mathematics
• Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare
• UnNews:H1N1 OVERBLOWN BY MEDIA!!!!!
• Pile of Enormous Socks of Genoa
• Vortex
• The Fast and the Furious (film series)
• Julius Malema
• Carnies
• I ate your Haagen-Dazs
• Matter
• Frida Kahlo
• The Pilgrim Fathers
• I will never forget
• Classical Satire
• Leprechaun
• Frostbite: A Christmas LP
• Your estimate of how long to reheat the lasagne
• The Rough Guide to Gotham City
• Unfomercials:Mutter - mein Endlosung!
• Radical Republicans
• UnBooks:The Stranger
• UnBooks:Menstruation: A Guide For Men by Jack Black
• A CCTV Nativity

2010

• Monitor
• UnDebate:Is it ever right to restrict freedom of speech?
• It's Your Turn To Take Out The Trash
• UnBooks:My unusual relationship with a volley ball by the name of Wilson
• A Brief History Of Hot Bitches In Leather Kicking Ass
• Ich Bin Ein Celebrity Juden, Get Me Out Of Here!
• Butter
• Why?:Not fly Air Zimbabwe?
• Red Herring
• Enhanced Interrogation Techniques
• The Common Sense Book of Baby and Child Care
• New Threat to Christmas
• Fascist Guy
• UnNews:FACT CHECK: Birthday Card not as Accurate as Hoped
• A Tinge of Minge
• UnBooks:The Redneck Elite (Abridged)
• HowTo:Write Colin Meloy Lyrics
• Gangs of New York
• HowTo:Be A King
• Work
• Jose Mourinho
• UnScripts:Officers and Espionage
• Will Smith
• The Godfather Part II
• UnBooks:Diary of a Monkey Lover
• Thin Mints
• The Hayes Family Newsletter
• Amerigo Vespucci
• Little Adolf's School Report
• Anne Hathaway
• IPad
• The History of the War on Drugs
• HowTo:Change a Spare Tire
• HowTo:Smuggle a snow globe
• HowTo:Get hold of a Number Six Cylon
• Jewish Cuisine
• UnNews:Genocide in Darfur Ends
• HowTo:Be A Production Manager
• HowTo:Write a Progressive Rock Song
• Charles DeGaulle
• California Highway Patrol
• I Am the Walrus
• HowTo:Handle Flashing Your Vagina in Public
• UnNews:NFL Claims Ownership of Every Word That Comes Out of Your Mouth
• Opeth
• UnNews:Snickers launches new advertising campaign
• Mark Rothko
• UnNews:French philosopher cites fictional characters in new book, is considered laughingstock
• Creationism
• Game:Alone in the dark
• Death of The Author
• Mortal Sin
• Tropical cyclone
• Extreme Paranormal
• Battle of the Bulge in my Pants
• Chris Rock
• Lateral thinking puzzle
• McDonland
• UnNews:US Stimulus not enough
• UnBooks:"Incoherent Overwritten Literary Trainwreck" by Thomas Pynchon
• Faith
• Phrase
• UnNews:God Orders Global Women Recall
• In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida
• Jihad Jane
• Damien Hirst
• Garage sale
• HowTo:Survive A Premature Burial
• Hollywood tour
• HowTo:Write Good Poetry
• Firearm attachments
• Gay Pubs
• HowTo:Blow a dog
• The Radio Star Murder
• UnNews:Obama to America: "April Fools!"
• Robert De Niro
• Why?:Do I need to provide this?
• Sideboob
• Trench warfare
• Jesus' foreskin
• Occam's Razor
• Charlie Kaufman
• MTV Castles: Elizabeth Bathory
• Natural Selection
• HowTo:Date an Emo Girl
• HowTo:Get Married
• Nintendo
• Giant Jew Band
• Dylan Thomas
• Biology
• UnBooks:Evelyn, the Modified Dog
• Bruce Wayne
• Tooth Fairy
• British Sitcoms
• A wizard did it
• Ghosts never seem to play fair
• HowTo:Be Man's Best Friend
• UnBooks:Papyrus Containing The Spell To Preserve Its Possessor Against Attacks From He Who Is In The Water
• You're Screwed
• Mecca Vice
• Gore Theory
• Did I really move to LA?
• UnNews:Things that have been done to Christians but would never be done to Muslims show sharp year on year increase
• Complete list of applications of trigonometry in today's society
• Boyd's Law
• Lobster
• Dennis Kucinich's wife
• Sir Francis Drake
• Chatroulette
• Christian Bale
• Filial Piety
• Morning wood
• HowTo:Be Enthusiastic Like Jack Black
• Bob the Sperm
• HowTo:Create a sandstorm
• Warm piss water
• HowTo:Part the Red Sea
• The Six Wives of Henry VIII
• Hollywood values
• Obi-Wan Kenobi
• Spider
• Voidism
• The Importance of Being Earnest
• Daily News
• Gay whales in Darfur
• Eadweard Muybridge, Zoopraxographer
• HowTo:Tell who is posting as an admin on the Uncyc Facebook page
• Bitch
• His word writ large
• The Wildlife of England's Canals
• Shopping Cart
• John Milton
• The Wizard of Aus
• The Grand Canyon
• UnScripts:Michael Bay's The Godfather
• Frog
• UnNews:Local man disappointed as Twister game fails to turn sexual
• Kyle MacLachlan
• UnNews:David Blaine to die for our Sins
• GMT
• Salamander
• Hello there! I'm a kite, and I will ruin your day!
• George McClellan
• Why?:Reinvent the wheel
• HowTo:Staple toast to a wall
• UnBooks:Early 90s Young Adult Novel
• Tantra
• Takeshi's Castle
• Anderson Cooper
• Sparta
• Badly Drawn Porn
• UnNews:Getting oiled-up fails to make seabird more attractive to females
• Bond Villain
• UnPoetia:Well-Oiled Birds
• UnNews:Obama doodles random shit
• Homosexuality in the British military
• UnTunes:Stalker
• UnNews:North Korea purge football team after 7-0 humiliation
• Sunni days and Arabian Nights
• UnBooks:Where do babies come from?
• UnNews:Warrant sent out for the arrest of the Wonderpets
• BIBLE!
• X Japan
• Tim Burton
• HowTo:Survive the Titanic
• What's a nigga gotta do to get a Pee Review around here?
• Animal Suicide
• V.
• Miss Teen South Carolina
• Gallows Humour
• Post Apocalypse
• Regular K
• Rolex
• Red Sea
• Dear Mr. Hornet
• Yes (band)
• Suddenly, Raccoons
• Marilyn Monroe
• Behind the Music
• Roger Ebert
• Diamonds & Rust
• Cracker Barrel
• Ol' Red
• TV Tropes
• UnTweets:Odysseus
• Unreliable Narrator
• Portal (game)
• Interview with the Vampire
• The Fourth Stooge
• Arachnism
• Traffic sign
• Gee, the mannequins at Old Navy sure are hot!
• HowTo:Be a Detective: Lessons from the Masters
• UnBooks:Bad Romance
• Bettie Page
• Anal sex
• Lens flare
• Dalek
• UnBooks:Keith Richards
• UnBooks:Choose Your Own Adventure:One Ordinary Day
• The Doolittle Raid
• Chekhov's gun
• HowTo:Be Japanese
• Russo-Japanese War
• Evan Almighty
• Propaganda
• Cylon and Garfunkel
• UnPoetia:Paradise Abridged
• UnBooks:Conversations With My Father
• Cuban Missile Crisis
• Fluffy Bunny World
• UnScripts:Good Cop Inanimate Cop
• Beige
• Take Your Son To Work Day
• Terry Gilliam
• Physics
• Xkcd
• Pointy Sticks
• Nancy Drew
• HowTo:Understand Jersey Shore
• Taco
• Until the Cows Come Home
• UnBooks:The Case of the Quagga of Kuala Lumpur
• UnNews:Tea Party supporters oppose plans to display severed heads of 9/11 victims at Ground Zero
• Monster Party
• The Last Man on Earth
• Laird Hamilton
• UnDebate:Is it morally unacceptable to have babies?
• Tea and Strumpets
• UnMovie Review:Inception (2010)
• Hochkonjunktur, bumste ich sie verlobtes, ich hatte geschlecht mit Ihrem man
• Brittany Hensel
• Karate Kid
• Saki
• Office Worker's Rant: An Excerpt
• UnNews:Stand Up to Stand Up to Cancer
• Green Dam Youth Escort
• Unfomercials:Bulimic Barbee
• William Westmoreland
• Why?:You should get a new couch
• Chicken
• Don't Feed the Ducks!!!
• Dragon Age: Origins
• Salsa (music)
• HowTo:Beat jet lag
• Dmitry Medvedev
• Jack Dempsey
• Shakespeare Authorship Debate
• Ann Coulter
• UnBooks:Fishing For Children
• Crossbow
• Norman Wisdom
• Prince Madog
• Boris Yeltsin
• UnReviews:The Merchant of Venice
• Marshmallows
• HowTo:Write a Beck Song
• Denise Milani's breasts
• Disguise
• Alfred E. Neuman
• Lord Christopher Monckton
• UnTunes:We In Da Club
• Dreaming
• Wrists
• Pursuit of Happiness
• John Connor
• Cemetery of the Absurd
• UnBooks:My Daddy Has Two Yachts
• Cheryl Cole
• UnBooks:Zombiebaron's Adventure To The Zoo
• UnBooks:The Uncyclonomicon - Into the Silent Screaming Mouth of Madness
• California Marijuana Initiative
• Whigs
• Battle of Grunwald
• A. A. Milne
• UnBooks:Fear And Loathing In Blackpool, Lancs
• Gastrorgasmic Cuisine
• Kettlebell
• Cancer (constellation)
• EVEN CHEAPER CAR INSURANCE!
• UnTweets:Noah
• United States of Earth
• James Broun-Ramsay, 1st Marquess of Dalhousie
• Bed
• Glenn Beck
• Punji Stick
• Tony Jaa
• Utopia
• The economic effects of retarded babies
• Suddenly, 'coons
• UnBooks:The Whimsical World of Freedom of Expression
• UnNews:Sputnik is launch!
• Protagonist
• Egyptian Gods
• Weird
• Collective Nouns
• Fuck ChiefjusticeDS
• UnBooks:The Bilderberg Group
• UnPoetia:T.S. Elliot Is Dead
• UnPoetia:Walking in a Klingon Wonderland
• UnNews:North Korea celebrates Miley's birthday
• UnNews:Local author gives up on dream
• UnTunes:Can't Be Blamed (For My Shitty Music)
• Wikipoleonic Complex
• Yogi Berra
• UnBooks:Dr Seuss' "The Git who Stoned Christians"
• Never on Sunday
• Herod the Great
• Scraggle
• UnBooks:The Wait
• HowTo:Regift
• UKIP Manifesto
• UnNews:Doors singer Jim Morrison wins profanity and exposure pardon
• Saskatchewan
• The Threat of Festivus
• Mark Robinson
• UnNews:Chance meeting between acquaintances causes awkward moment
• Skeptic's Annotated Santa
• Male Adolescence
• Freudian slip
• Uncyclopedia is almost full
• Whatcha thinking about?
• Jesus was Christian, NOT Jewish
• Moby-Dick
• Uncle John's Fetus Burgers and Abortion Clinic
• Money

2011

• UnNews:Maria speaks to us
• Roberto Duran
• Alice in Sunderland
• Riddle
• UnNews:Amnesty International unfriends Uganda
• The Godfather Part III
• The Song Remains the Same
• Barbarian
• Aqueduct
• UnNews:Polls indicate Americans are terrified
• UnNews:Bin Laden captured after checking-in on Foursquare
• God's answering service
• UnBooks:Duty
• UnNews:Fantasy realms left defenseless in wake of Warcraft expansion pack
• Find an Asian wife!
• Dark Science
• New York hobos
• HowTo:Go into the light
• UnReviews:The Road (2009)
• Todd Palin
• Slime Cube
• Lonely hearts column
• UnNews:Post-structuralist engineer blamed for bridge disaster
• Kitten Cookbook
• A Fine Frenzy
• UnBooks:Let's take a walk in the city!
• Take A Break (magazine)
• Yellow fever
• A Study of Existentialism within Speed 2: Cruise Control
• Elephant
• Blockbuster
• UnScripts:Star Trek (film, 2009 reboot)
• UnScripts:Law & Order: Puritan New England
• Lionel Richie Ceiling Dance Conspiracy Theory
• The First Lunar-American War
• Pearl necklace
• BabyTV
• Miracle Science
• Un-British Activities
• Descentiousness
• Tittyfuck rape
• Roger Hargreaves
• Aristotle
• Elfen Lied
• Workaround-oriented programming
• UnNews:World distracted, Israel reverts to scheming
• Science fiction
• In MS Paint With One Arm, While Furiously Masturbating
• UnNews:5-year-old tricks Wisconsin governor
• Muddy Waters
• Trainspotting (novel)
• Rich guys who blow all their money on expensive whores
• There'll Always Be An England?
• UnBooks:The Old Man and LV
• KDE
• Samurai
• UnNews:Local grandmother finally uses printer
• Raymond Chandler's "Murder on the Orient Express"
• Joe Pesci
• Mike Tyson
• Adam West
• Wesley willis
• Joy Division
• Talk:Milton Babbitt
• Gross Moral Turpitude
• Mobutu Sese Seko
• Xenopubes
• UnNews:Civil war hits Wisconsin
• The Abridged Reader's Digest Abridged Classics
• HowTo:Cook Children
• HowTo:Be a Troll
• Rapto-velocity
• HowTo:Become a Master of Disguise
• A Day With My Son
• Bass
• Katy Perry
• UnBooks:Zombiebaron's Adventure To Asia
• UnNews:Madden 12 to feature new Lockout Mode
• Dinosaur
• Idiots
• Friday (song)
• Miley Davis
• Toshiro Mifune
• Tombstone
• UnNews:Michigan supreme court votes in favor of rapper
• Milton Babbitt/rewrite
• Psychedelic music
• UnBooks:The Revelations of St John the Divine of Woking
• Last of the Mohicans
• Pikeys - Our Friends
• Salem witch trials
• People Who Like to Fuck Naked
• UnNews:Study: Blueberries are actually just peas holding their breath
• Why?:Categorise pages
• Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying, Sit Down and Relax for a Bit, Try and Read or Something, Maybe Eat a Cheese Sandwich, and Basically Do Anything Other Than Obsessively Think About Being Obliterated in a Massive Nuclear Explosion
• On her wedding day, saying the things left unsaid
• User:Dr. Skullthumper/10 reasons to defrost Frosty
• Milton Babbitt
• Jeff Beck
• UnNews:Encyclopædia Dramatica ends undramatically, world celebrates
• Thomas Alva Edison - a man to measure
• Victory
• Damaged goods
• UnNews:Crackpot confirms irrational suspicions after viewing online news piece
• HowTo:Beat Shaq
• Blind Lemon Kraftwerk
• Ovum
• HowTo:Frighten small children
• Heaven's Gate
• Neighborhood Watch
• Machine gun
• Blue-ringed octopus
• Flying Gypsies
• UnBooks:Memoirs of a Critic
• UnNews:Unrest in Syria, nobody cares
• Don Martin
• Stratego
• Born again
• Updating The Classics
• UnNews:Humans evolved from dinosaurs
• HowTo:Reenact History
• UnNews:Old people more likely to die, study shows
• Queen Victoria
• UnScripts:The Socialer Network
• Mailing it in
• Muammar Gaddafi
• Encyclopedia Dramatica (Encyclopedia)
• HowTo:Annoy Richard Dawkins
• Guru Maharaj Ji
• UnTunes:Ain't Another Way (The Pedophile's Lament)
• Secretary
• December 21, 2012
• UnNews:Abraham Lincoln was an asshat, historian concludes
• A Series of Unfortunate Events
• Ben Croshaw
• Skunk
• Why?:Does Mads Mikkelsen not speak one line of dialogue in Valhalla Rising?
• UnNews:Obama: We're not responsible for drones with US Army emblem's actions
• Sofia Coppola
• UnNews:Banks give up defense of burgling customer's houses
• UnTunes:Still Alive (Bin Laden 2011 Cover)
• Armenian Genocide
• HowTo:Clown Stalk
• HowTo:Get your candy back off that baby
• HowTo:Face your upcoming death
• Sexual harassment
• Doping in sports
• Ice cream truck
• HowTo:Make Breakfast Goo (For Men)
• G-Rex
• HowTo:Get into Heaven
• My Name is Earl
• Novak Djokovic
• Celebrity Advice
• UnScripts:The Single Caucasian Roommate
• Visual puns
• Kryptonite
• Tom Paine
• War of Colonial Aggression
• Shabalov Vs Areshchenko
• Sans-culottes
• Mahjong
• Invader Zim
• Boston Molasses Disaster
• Inbox
• Planned Parenthood
• Chicago Seven
• UnNews:Fred Phelps reads rest of Bible, disbands Westboro Baptist Church
• Uh oh!
• Backmasking
• HowTo:Be Deep
• Padmé
• Dave Chappelle
• Madame Tussauds
• George Carlin
• Zach Braff
• Hypnotist
• ToddiPhone Viral Marketing Campaign
• Battle of Guadalcanal
• Final Fantasy VII
• HowTo:Replace bread with something else
• Wall Street Kid
• A pizza a day keeps the doctor away
• Game of Thrones
• Uncyclopedia made my life more different
• Bohemian Grove
• Rand Paul
• Andy Kaufman
• Two and a Half Men
• It's Not You, It's Me
• UnRecipe:Fantastik flavored hallucinogenic ham with Uranium seasoning
• MTV Cribs
• Québec
• Ethnicity
• Boyfriend
• Nazi Hover Tank
• Creation myth
• Office Space
• HowTo:Get Off the Road
• Why?:Invade the Falklands
• PE Teacher
• The Big Crunch
• Unobtanium
• Chicks
• Purple Prose
• HowTo:Make Breakfast Dew (For Women)
• Why?:IPs can't edit the main page
• Negative potato
• Animal fucking
• Jean de la Fontaine
• UnNews:Tour de France 2011 filled with controversies
• Peter Dinklage
• Feral Child
• The Wire
• Rosetta Stone
• Swedish steamshovel
• Carmen Miranda Syndrome
• Puddle of shit
• Bureau of time management
• John Belushi
• Ozone
• Mini-golf
• Illogicopedia
• HowTo:Write an Uncyclopedia article without reading any of the rules or directions or manuals or policies first
• Sun
• Colorless green ideas sleep furiously
• HowTo:Eat sand
• UnNews:Zeus Endorses Schwarzenegger for Republican Presidential Candidacy
• Crying and Wanking
• HowTo:Hug another man
• Lynx Cool Metal Shower Gel
• UnNews:Journalists unable to wait for the 10th anniversary of 9/11
• Dikembe Mutombo
• UnScripts:Waiting For Breivik
• My big 9-11 whoopsie
• Eyewitness
• Watermelon
• A Man Getting Hit in the Crotch 800 Times
• UnNews:Faggot had personal problem with me
• Final Destination
• Daemonic kitties
• 2 Girls 1 Calculus Equation
• HowTo:Train to look awesome!
• UnTunes:Uncyclopedia Didn't Start The Fire
• UnNews:Alaska woman wins 2011 International Punching-A-Bear-In-The-Face Championship
• Horseshoes (game)
• Major urinary proteins
• Australian Pink Floyd
• Skeleton warrior
• Subliminal stimuli
• Irreducible complexity
• UnNews:911 conspiracies explained by a sandwich
• The guy who always conveniently has anything needed stored in his ridiculously large 80s parachute pants
• MKULTRA
• Ghostwriter
• This is not Sparta
• Serious
• Corpsearian
• Principality of Sealand
• UnNews:Renewed violence in 506,220th day of Israeli-Palestinian conflict
• Louisiana Purchase
• Boards of Canada
• Arecibo Message
• Pac-Man (walkthrough)
• Spittoon
• Apathy Man
• HowTo:Be A College DJ
• Indiana Jones and the Typical University-level Dig
• SpongeBob SquarePants
• UnNews:Cancer research causes cancer
• Creeping featurism
• UnNews:Deity seeks Gagging Order
• HowTo:Snowboard your way to awesomeness!
• HowTo:Make me RICH
• Fanny Cradock
• HowTo:Milk a Cow
• Receptive aphasia
• Vasco da Gama
• RoboCop
• Knights in White Satin
• How to:Pick your nose discreetly in public/At the Park
• Deviled eggs
• Door handle
• HowTo:Disable a Tsar Bomba
• I Have A Problem
• Nothing is permanent
• Jim Bridger
• The only way to success
• 1969 24 Hours of Le Mans
• Augustus
• Fox News
• UnNews:Tournament of Hell to be played again for first time in six years
• Uncyclopedia:Don't Eat Waffles Here
• Don King
• UnNews:Justin Bieber eats a sandwich
• UnNews:Release of new Elder Scrolls game results in mass existential crisis
• Where The Wild Onions Grow
• George Washington: ...that George Washington was an avid heterosexual?
• UnNews:Town council takes 'steps' to tackle crime
• UnNews:WikiLeaks reveals I was an accident
• Iceland
• Herman Cain
• UnNews:Crippled Boy Arrested For Sitting During the Pledge of Allegiance
• UnScripts:Good Dog/Bad Dog
• Mexico tourism brochure
• Imagination
• Banana Jacket
• Extraterrestrial life
• HowTo:Turn nature into collectibles
• Tojo Books
• Italy
• Mount Everest Disaster
• UnNews:Stay strong, great people, for Kim Jong-il passed away
• Snow angels
• UnNews:Grinch calls Whovillians 'invented people'
• HowTo:Recognize and Fight a Boss without Losing your Last Life
• UnNews:Son of Gaddafi caught attempting to enter Canada
• All Quiet on the Western Front

2012

• UnNews:Numbers at all time low
• Sex: ...that the average human male between the ages of 13 and 18 is has thought about sex with Brad Pitt at least once?
  • ...and if you haven't before you just did after reading the above statement.
• Common sense
• Fall of Constantinople
• UnNews:Wisconsin resident becomes last man in nation to approve of Congress
• Vladimir Putin
• UnNews:Refugee Pandas safe in Scotland
• Frances Farmer Will Have Her Revenge on Seattle
• Claude Monet
• Charles Mingus
• Sewing
• UnBooks:My Tedious Day
• UnNews:Uncyclopedia UnSignpost to appear before Leveson Inquiry
• UnBooks:Interesting Excerpts from My Mother's Diary
• UnBooks:A Pragmatic Affair
• Twilight (novel)
• Thank God it's Friday
• Cum Dumpster
• Bad things have happened recently
• Esperanto
• Lawn mowers
• Plant
• Cheech & Chong
• Student loan
• Great Australian tourist destinations
• Really Big Tree
• UnNews:Chinese claim Ron Paul unerectable
• Steve Irwin
• Frog Semen
• Tales of an Emo
• UnNews:Tupperware Rave Is Huge Success
• Vangelis
• Anna Kournikova
• Inter-Lights Inc
• God's userpage
• Pierre Curie
• HowTo:Be Happy
• UnNews:"All Narcissists Look In A Mirror Day" celebrated
• Aran Islands
• Somalia
• Anti-humour
• Girl with a Pearl Earring
• James Bevel
• Martin Luther King, Jr.
• Funny
• Titus
• HowTo:Get things for free
• Mohandas Gandhi
• Dead Dicks
• UnBooks:Parkhurst Pete's World of Wonders
• UnBooks:The Diary of Neville Chamberlain
• The Exorcist
• HowTo:Persuade your husband
• GIANT NOVELTY FOAM HANDS!!!
• Homophones (grammar)
• The toaster in Pulp Fiction
• UnNews:Teenager admits to having fun; D.E.A. moves to classify 'fun' as a Schedule I drug
• Amero
• Archaeology
• Byronic hero
• Aristocrats (class)
• Antifreeze
• Sylvia Plath
• UnNews:Barack Obama proposes legalizing prostitution, pot in effort to balance budget, avoid tax increases
• Nineteen Eighty-Four
• Skrillex
• UnBooks:Jacques Attali's guide to predicting your future
• Mathematics: ...that forgetting to carry the one is the leading cause of disaster for world domination plans?
• Recent developments in Crypto-Zoology
• Nuclear semiotics
• Bing Crosby
• UnNews:Bruce Springsteen recording of "Tick Tock" surfaces
• Streets of Laredo
• Womp Rat
• UnNews:U.S. Supreme Court allows everyone to go naked
• Dragon Warrior
• Monocle
• Counting to potato
• Heraclitus
• Rick Santorum
• Cabbage
• UnReviews:Milk
• Cow tipping
• UnNews:Newt Gingrich Doesn't Need You, Newt Gingrich Doesn't Need ANYBODY
• Above Top Secret
• God: ...that God is possibly the best known fictional entity on Earth after the Beatles? He was elected to be our god for the 2006th year running this year, barely beating the Egyptian sun god Ra, Omnipotent Odin, and the Almighty Prune (still recovering from alcoholism). He is also dog spelled backwards.
• UnScripts:Who built the moon
• UnScripts:Titanic Wireless Transmissions Conspiracy
• The Yardbirds
• Ron Paul
• UnNews:Alien Invasion Plans Revealed
• India
• Resident Evil
• War
• DuMont Television Network
• RMS Olympic
• Frankly Disappointing Telescope
• Earth's Children
• Newt Gingrich
• UnNews:UnNews editors vote: 'We wanted an iPad 3'
• Bhagavad-gita
• Bipolar Girl
• Minor League Baseball
• Confidence
• UnNews:Our Great Leader Kim Jong-un brings even more prosperity to us glorious North Koreans
• My Lai Massacre
• Super! Giant Robot Team-Force
• UnNews:FED cites plight of Kennedy, Jesus to warn dissenters
• Holding Open Doors
• UnNews:Tom Boonen wins Paris-Roubaix cycling race while smoking a cigar
• Salvador Dalí
• The Great Elephant Revolt of 2011
• Super Mario Brothers
• Reverse Holocaust
• UnNews:Bomb bomb bomb – bomb bomb McCain
• UnBooks:Tropic of Cancer
• Next Year's Australian Grand Prix
• Asexuality
• UnNews:Surprise winner of Masters Golf Tournament cries "Ow!"
• Thunderstorm of 1976
• A Victorian Gentleman's Guide to the Trivialities of Courtship
• Kwanzaa
• UnNews:Apple unveils iWeapon
• Political correctness
• UnNews:Canada's new phunny munny
• Extra mega brownie points
• UnBooks:The journey of the ugly kitten
• Apathy
• The substance left at the bottom of a squeezy bottle
• UnNews:Junior designer makes her own prom dress
• William Faulkner
• UnNews:Police investigate "bizarre incidents" at Walmart
• UnNews:Pope urges Church to reflect on abuse
• The Orbital Resonance Ratio of Jupiter's Largest Moons
• Arizona
• Crumpet
• T-80
• Wind generators
• Michael Jackson
• Medical school
• UnNews:Debate over death penalty raging in Canada
• Finger Cancer
• Baby boomer
• Magic Pantheism
• Maine
• Suspicious
• UnNews:Wind farms are solution to global warming
• Winfield Scott
• UnBooks:A Day in the Life of the Canadian Prime Minister
• Tetragrammaton
• UnNews:Some guy does some stuff
• UnNews:Montrealer fed up with strikers dismembers one
• 0.999...
• Jew
• Saturn (Lying Bitch)
• Soma
• HowTo:Build a Paper Empire
• HowTo:Meet women
• Slender Loris
• Human anatomy
• Ask Jeeves
• Template:Boner
• UnBooks:Pat Robertson's Christian Pocket Dictionary: Volume Deux
• UnNews:Man with no head swims English Channel
• Penis penis Penis penis penis penis Penis penis
• Hot indiscriminate sex
• My Dog Has Fleas
• UnNews:Cannibalism becoming increasingly popular
• Prime Directive
• Is the bear a Catholic?
• Object Permanence
• There Isn't Any
• Cartilage
• UnBooks:The Succession Speeches of Three Roman Emperors
• Freezer
• Yoda
• Professor X
• UnNews:Tragic misunderstanding leads to hotel shooting
• Volleyball
• Fifty shades of grey
• Chick-fil-A
• Jeopardy!
• IBauer
• UnReviews:Robinson in Ruins
• Nazi Eating
• Doody
• Fisher Price: A Retrospective: ...that there are more ways to interpret the words "go eat shit fuckers" than there are words in "go eat shit fuckers"?
• Helen of Troy
• Sania Mirza
• Twitter
• Avenge my death
• UnNews:British Tour de France win, in spite of team's last-minute hitch
• Talk Talk
• Snips, snails and puppy dog tails
• Luxembourg (city)
• Minecraft
• Quebec City
• Fancy
• Objectivity
• UnNews:U.N. warns Syria to halt violence or face further warnings
• Disney
• HowTo:Become the king of pop
• HowTo:Make your own Large Hadron Collider
• Citizens United v. Federal Election Commission
• Lance Armstrong
• Hiroshima
• Peacock
• Function (mathematics)
• HowTo:Make a sitcom
• Astrology
• Japanese TV series centered around battles where powerful creatures are summoned using some small object that usually has a real-life equivalent of these battles in the form of a game, except in real life, you don't actually get to summon any creatures
• Jaws (parallel universe version)
• UnNews:Romney/Ryan to re-institute Negro slavery
• Rock and Roll (food)
• Sturgeon
• Brian Sewell
• Syria
• Rocks
• An infinite number of monkeys with typewriters
• UnScripts:Waiting For Breivik 2: The Breifist
• Lasagne
• Fire hydrant
• Julian Assange
• Alternative legal systems
• UnNews:Ignorance not bliss, new study finds
• Slender
• Mountain Dew
• Hipster
• UnNews:Afghanistan death toll closing in on 9/11 target
• Battle of Trafalgar
• Universe
• AAAAAAAAA!
• Hmor
• UnNews:Prof sues law school for bias against conservatives
• UnBooks:Dirty Harry Potter
• UnNews:Abu Hamza 'devastated' over Queen revelation
• UnNews:100m Americans watch West Indies win cricket final
• HowTo:Stalk your ex
• Corn
• HowTo:Become an Assassin
• Heat death of the universe
• Hairy ball theorem
• Talk radio
• UnDebate:The UnPresidential Debate
• Stevie Wonder
• Guyana
• Mensa
• UnRecipe:Crunchy Beaver with Pine Gum Coulis
• Being and Nothingness
• HowTo:Kill Yourself With A Brick
• Muffin the Mule
• JigSaw
• Donald Trump
• HowTo:Be an American in Europe
• Battle of the Alamo
• UnScripts:Superman's first adventure
• Compulsive cabin building
• Romance of the Three Kingdoms
• Gangnam Style
• Deepwater Horizon oil spill
• Why?:Your cat died
• Bitcoin
• University of Antarctica
• Boardwalk Empire
• John Travolta
• Grandmother paradox
• Green ink
• The Last Poker
• Clint Eastwood's Mule
• Koch Brothers
• Yellow Turban Rebellion
• Sheep: ...that sheep shrink when it rains?
• Jim Morrison
• Auld Lang Syne

2013

• Monopoly (game)
• Claudette Colvin
• HowTo:Beet off
• Hannibal Lecter
• Grand Rapids, Michigan
• HowTo:Insulate your loft
• UnScripts:The United States Government Just Doesn't Give a Fuck
• UnNews:Uncyclopedia moves to UPN
• Symphony in Z Minor
• History of Great Britain
• I want a cookie
• UnNews:What happened to Italian cocks?
• UnNews:NONSENSE WATERMELON CATASTROPHE
• Gerard Way
• Hack writer
• David Brubeck
• A Helpful Compilation of the One Hundred (or so) Worst Things to Stick Your Dick into, and an Account of the Scientific Explorations Thereof — An Abridged Folio Edition, with Copious Illustrations and Annotations, for Your Edification and Enlightenment
• Perfect Square
• Silent radio
• The things your family doesn't know
• Mutaween
• There's Something Strange About My Neighbor...
• Wild Jews
• UnNews:Man sues God; is smited
• UnNews:Delicious New Zealand bird set for extinction by 2023
• UnBooks:The Brothers Karamazov
• UnNews:Unwikileaks in the news
• UnNews:Hand transplant man masturbates for first time
• 1875 Dunedin beach baseball riots
• Amnesia: The Dark Descent
• UnNews:Bush blames Barney for Iraq war decision
• UnNews:"Gay" doesn't mean what Internet thinks it means
• Mammogram
• Platinum
• Saw
• UnBooks Biography:The guy who invented soap
• UnScripts:Tony Hancock: The Sperm Donor
• The New Jersey Hoax
• Charlie Brown
• The Wikipedia BBS
• James Cook
• BladeRunnerway Bride
• Whale bones
• Fred Basset
• UnNews:Scientists "discover" new fossils
• The Maori Show
• Nillion
• I'd like to talk to you about Jesus
• UnNews:Local boy helps team win championship game
• Still life
• UnNews:Editorial: I don't mean to be rude, but please don't do that to my daughter
• UnDebate:Is gun control necessary?
• iEye
• UnScripts:It's Spring Break!
• Get-rich-quick scheme
• UnNews:Nintendo Puu to be released
• Red Bull
• UnNews:Bellicose Uzi kills Lebanese gangster’s ex-wife
• Glass Mike Tyson
• To the Lighthouse
• The Lorax
• UnNews:Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer dead at 53
• Snakes on a Plane
• Reasonable doubt