User talk:Leverage/archivejune2014-August2015

HMC

Hey man...I hope you'll be in Happy Monkey this year. You'll give Zombie a good run for his money!!! --ShabiDOO 18:22, 1 June 2014 (UTC)

User:Leverage/horoscopes

Wow. Interesting stuff horoscopes. It's obviously all just to do with electricity and magnetism. I find it hilarious that mankind mostly have convinced themselves that it's all nonsense. I liked your Gemini reference. I was born "on the cusp" between Gemini and Cancer, 21st June. The messiah always is... So what are you going to do with this page? I see that it's only linked from your user page currently. JFC 18:46. Jun 9

This is just my personal archive. I tend to make little mistakes in these, so I am letting it sit for aday, then I paste it to the other pages. Leverage (talk) 18:51, 9 June 2014 (UTC)

That edit just restored my faith in Uncyclopedia. "In 1997, the Captain narrowly avoided death at the side of Princess Diana. He had been employed by the secret service to challenge Diana's chauffeur, Henri Lacoste, to a drinking match" I think we are going to make it after all... JFC 21:48. Jun 9

Have you seen this?

http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/2014/06/20/swiss-cheese-pervert-chris-pagano-guilty-indecent-exposure-pictures_n_5515706.html?utm_hp_ref=uk. -- IFYMB! Talk to me baby! 09:36, 21 June 2014 (UTC)

I think this is your welcome back UnNews story! I was keeping an eye on the cricket yesterday, from 1813 on there are lots of cheese-based puns to give you a hand. http://www.bbc.com/sport/0/cricket/27890541 Leverage (talk) 09:50, 21 June 2014 (UTC)

Ridiculously belated reply

Thanks for your note! I replied here. T. (talk) 21:30, 29 June 2014 (UTC)

I fall under the same category, sorry for not replying on my talk page about your article. I'm glad it's on the front page, see you didn't need me :) Mattsnow 16:56, 7 July 2014 (UTC)

I would love you to do an audio recording of it!!! Leverage (talk) 16:59, 7 July 2014 (UTC)

I am from the french part, it would sound weird :P Mattsnow 22:09, 9 July 2014 (UTC)

I know! The article is kind of geared towards French-speakers. If you can do it, I'd really appreciate it. I'd love to hear you saying Québec Chausettes Rouges :) Leverage (talk) 06:31, 10 July 2014 (UTC)

I respectfully decline the invitation :P Mattsnow 16:45, 10 July 2014 (UTC)

World Cup

Hey Leverage, I probably will write some kind of world cup summary UnNews along a similar vein to my other football summary type news so you don't need to (unless of course you want to). So yeah, I'm on it g safe. P.S. real upset I missed your five minute soirée into IRC, would've said Hello to you so hard. Hugs and kisses - B@NZai k!tten (Meow?)B 14:25, 9 July 2014 (UTC)

Who are you rooting for tonight? Which side do you predict to win? --ShabiDOO 16:30, 9 July 2014 (UTC)

Either way, I am having trouble keeping the jizz from erupting in sheer anticipation of the event. - B@NZai k!tten (Meow?)B 16:56, 9 July 2014 (UTC)

Kittens have errupting jizz? --ShabiDOO 17:15, 9 July 2014 (UTC)

I literally just hit puberty. Call me banzaicat. -BanzaiCat 18:19, 9 July 2014 (UTC)

I have more Argie friends than Dutch, but for some reason I want the Dutchmen to win. As long as Van Persie breaks both legs and a penis. Leverage (talk) 19:43, 9 July 2014 (UTC)

I generally tend to prefer the team that's dominating the first 20 minutes of the game. Which was Argentina. An Argentinan almost broke a leg. Since they wear boxes I'm not sure any penises will be broken. But we can always hope so. --ShabiDOO 20:48, 9 July 2014 (UTC)

Enough of this nonsense discussion! Voting is required! MrN 21:38. Jul 9

Vote!

Vote now! Vote for Messi vs Ronaldo.

Messi

Score: 1

1. For Because Ronaldo is a cheating cu*t, and Messi is not. MrN 21:38. Jul 9

Ronaldo

Score: 1

•  For. He INVENTED rentboy chic. He was widely mocked when he came to Man Yoo for looking like a woofter, but he became so successful, that now young men all over Europe are plucking their eyebrows. Leverage (talk) 06:33, 10 July 2014 (UTC)

  Comment: These are not positive attributes. MrN 15:59. Jul 13

What's the world cup

Score: 1

--ShabiDOO 22:52, 9 July 2014 (UTC)

Nonseculars

Score: 0

Heskey

Score: 1

 For. - B@NZai k!tten (Meow?)B 06:44, 10 July 2014 (UTC)

More audio?

Hello sir. I just thought I would pop by to plead with you to consider doing some more audio for some of your unnews. From what I can tell there is a little resistance to some of my VFH noms of your stuff and I think that if audio was added it might tip the balance. I understand that people don't want to FA too many unnews so obviously to get an FA it's got to be stand out.

Personally I think that UnNews:Cricket has cunt amnesty and UnNews:Harris wobbled me against my will - board are masterpieces! Both work on many different levels, are funny and actually informative. Unfortunately obviously both are rather British centric... Those dam yanks! They would not know perls if Jesus gave them as a necklace. :D Anyway, I hope you consider doing audio for either as I think it would make them stellar. :) MrN 16:09. Jul 13

I will think about it. I tend only to do audio if I can do funny voices. I don't really mind if things get featured or not, I never nom myself, don't update HoS, etc, and I kind of get the objection to featuring UnNews. Leverage (talk) 13:31, 14 July 2014 (UTC)

Hey

Noticed you haven't posted an UnNews in a while hope you are not dead and on holiday or something. I would try to keep the ball rolling during your absence but my moments of inspiration are few and far between.

And yes I posted this above beevers bit as it was me who noticed you were missing but he edit conflicted me because he wants to seem like he's a really caring guy. - B@NZai k!tten (Meow?)B 19:20, 22 July 2014 (UTC)

True facts. It's one of the lesser-known tricks in the Sociopath's Toolbox. ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Tue, Jul 22 '14 19:22 (UTC)

@Banzai. Free inspiration: Commonwealth games are in Glasgow, make UnNews about alcoholism, headbutting, heroin abuse, etc being events. Leverage (talk) 10:22, 24 July 2014 (UTC)

Don't stay gone too long

...you hard-working bastard. Uncyclopedia misses you. ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Tue, Jul 22 '14 19:13 (UTC)

Leverage (talk) 10:24, 24 July 2014 (UTC)

Yay! ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Thu, Jul 24 '14 8:07 (UTC)

Apropos of nothing

Just loved the wording.

Leverage (talk) 14:25, 29 July 2014 (UTC)

  I like thisThat sure is some voluptuous wording. - B@NZai k!tten (Meow?)B 15:05, 29 July 2014 (UTC)

I like a) the idea of "asking to fuck" and b) Frustrated onanists screaming "Argh not this bullshit!" when confronted with the average pron site. --Leverage (talk) 16:40, 29 July 2014 (UTC)

Today's distraction from my streaming adventures:

At a moment's notice?
Telephone call: Sorry Gary, there's an ugly girl outside, you're going to have to fuck her, more or less now.--Leverage (talk) 09:03, 11 August 2014 (UTC)

Thanks

I spent thirty seconds looking at this thing, and then I said to myself "L.A. Confidential". So then I went here and yeah, BOOM! L.A. Confidential. Thanks for today's fleeting moment of triumph in my life. ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Sat, Aug 9 '14 4:50 (UTC)

Yep! I can't remember what I looked up - I think it was dark movie scene or something. The red-headed chief of cops from LA Confidential is one of the all-time what's-his-names. Leverage (talk) 08:50, 9 August 2014 (UTC)

that...

Great..you know.. Where it's different.. to that thing that I.. Did I sing it? Anyway...I've lost my train of..you know. mAttlobster. (hello) 21:47, 13 August 2014 (UTC)

The End of the World

Saint Cliff collared by the rozzers!!? The Queen done for drug use!!!..well the queen's horse Estimate was....When reality out runs fiction like a super charged Usain Bolt what hope is there for satire? --RomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 12:37, 14 August 2014 (UTC)

Weirdest part was I found out on my smartphone, from you. Seriously, is anyone safe. Cliff? Why are you dragging me under the mistletoe? Why did that wine taste funny? Leverage (talk) 14:55, 20 August 2014 (UTC)

Need to keep you in the loop Leverage. Did you change your complimentary Nicole Scherzinger for a new phone?? --RomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 17:34, 20 August 2014 (UTC)

PRIZE THAT YOU DIDN'T GET AGES AGO, BUT HERE IT IS

This user created Phone sex, an article originally requested on Uncyclopedia:Requested articles. You're welcome!

~Sir Frosty (Talk to me!) 00:45, 17 August 2014 (UTC)

UnTunes

Is it you signing? It's beautiful!

By the way, do you know why the audio template won't show on the UnTunes page? I'm currently on an iPad, in case it matters. Anton (talk) 16:51, 21 August 2014 (UTC)

It was a quickie! I think I can do a better Ringo impression, but anyway. What do you mean about the problem? By "audio template" do you mean the one I put on the page? And by "untunes page" do you mean the UnTunes homepage, or the Imagine page itself? I am on a macbook, here it looks all ok but I might not be looking at the right thing. Leverage (talk) 16:55, 21 August 2014 (UTC)

The UnNews Audio template with your file doesn't display on the Imagine page. It just leaves a blank space between the section heading and the lyrics and nothing happens when you click on it. Anton (talk) 16:58, 21 August 2014 (UTC)

The UnNews Audio player uses Flash, which iOS doesn't support hence why it's not showing up. It would need to be HTML5 to work on iOS.

Btw great job with that track Leverage! -- Lost Labyrinth • (t) • (c) • (a) 17:02, 21 August 2014 (UTC)

Ah, I see! Thanks for the explanation! Anton (talk) 17:04, 21 August 2014 (UTC)

Lost Lab beat me to it, it's an iPad issue. I fucking hate it when you can do something on one device and then not on another. Leverage (talk) 17:03, 21 August 2014 (UTC)

Yeah, me too. Anton (talk) 17:04, 21 August 2014 (UTC)

Wait, do we have a parody of Twist and Shout? Anton (talk) 17:21, 21 August 2014 (UTC)

UnNews sources

When you cite your sources for UnNews articles, I've frequently seen you put your username as the name of the author (of the source article). Yet, the articles you list as sources have been written by different people. A mistake? Anton (talk) 23:10, 21 August 2014 (UTC)

No, it's deliberate. Obviously we normally never both to quote the author, and I thought it was a nice way to sign the article. It is in the recognition that UnNews is not the Onion, with a fairly consistent style and quality control, and I think it's nice for readers to be able to click on my name, find my other articles, etc. It might be just me, but whenever I read an UnNews, I always click on 'history' to see who is behind it, and this avoids that. Funnybony usually puts 'repeater' but I would like him to leave a link to his userspace, so readers can find his back catalogue. Leverage (talk) 07:27, 22 August 2014 (UTC)

Ah, ok! It's a good idea, but I am not sure that putting your name on the sources section won't be confusing. Maybe a special signature template can be made for that purpose? Anton (talk) 07:59, 22 August 2014 (UTC)

I agree with Anton. Whilst I don't really care, you should probably have the actual writer of the source and then a separate template or something could be made to show who wrote the article maybe? - B@NZai k!tten (Meow?)B 13:31, 22 August 2014 (UTC)

Well I have probably done it on the last 150 stories! I doubt anyone is thinking, "Hang on, there's a guy who works for the BBC called Leverage?" especially as other writers put things like Mike Hunt as the journalist's name. I opt for quietly ignoring the issue. Leverage (talk) 13:58, 22 August 2014 (UTC)

Yeah we've been using names that aren't the source names since the beginning of UnNews. I don't see how that would be confusing. -RAHB 04:13, 27 August 2014 (UTC)

Fags

Hey, just throwing this out there: What if God Hates Fags was featured directly after Newport Cigarettes because fuck yeah I'm drunk let's have some fun for the sake of redundancy? -- Kip the Egg Talk Works 09:41, Aug. 26, 2014

First Kip, I want to say how happy I am to see you more and more active again. Secondly, I just had a bit of a wrestle with the feature queue, so I am not in the mood to tinker with it again, but I like your idea, if you have the patience, go for it! Leverage (talk) 09:45, 26 August 2014 (UTC)

He's active? Oh God! Hide your daughters! --EMC ^[TALK] 20:15 Aug 26 2014

Hey

Keep up the good work on the UnNews Facebook page! Let me know if/how I can help. I may or may not have explained that I schedule posts for our social media pages, but was thinking we could schedule Horoscopes for the UnNews Facebook page too. Also, let me know if you ever want to collaborate on an audio sometime. --EMC ^[TALK] 20:15 Aug 26 2014

A letter

Thanks for your "proofreading and style change"! Very helpful. One question though, what's the point of the three question marks and the nowiki tags enclosing the sentence that contains them? Anton (talk) 16:17, 9 September 2014 (UTC)

I didn't understand the sentence. I hope the nowiki stuff meant that it didnt show up on the real page (?) Leverage (talk) 21:06, 9 September 2014 (UTC)

Oh, then you confused them with this: <!-- A comment that is not supposed to show on the page -->. Anton (talk) 17:38, 10 September 2014 (UTC)

2 image business

thanks for correcting the images i accidentally overwrote, leverage. i was in the middle of cleaning up redirects and such when uncyc stopped working...one too many hamsters must have fallen off the wheels. SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 13:57, 14 September 2014 (UTC)

No worries, it was only on my watchlist cos I did exactly the same thing! Leverage (talk) 13:58, 14 September 2014 (UTC)

Maaaask

Hey Leverage. You've been pretty lazy the last few weeks and you've not been doing your fair share around here. This complacency and lethargy has to stop. Take your hands out of your pants and put them on your mouse and keyboard and get at it aright? For example you can take a look at this if you have a fleeting second. I'm totally at a loss what to do. I feel there should be some secondary concept or twist or what not. Or just an expantion and a few LOL moments. Want to help? I know you spend all day sleeping and watching cartoons but you gotta get out in the real world and get some fresh air by looking at this article online. In any case...if you have a chance I'd appreciate your help. But seeing how useless you've been recently I'd understand if you'll give it a pass. Or maybe do it sometime soon (as in never). :) HUGS! --ShabiDOO 02:54, 19 September 2014 (UTC)

Nicholas

Am I replying to you correctly? Do I just write something on a users talk page to speak to them? I'm sorry I'm a noob

Nickk (talk) 19:12, 26 September 2014 (UTC)

Hehe, I asked the same thing when I got here. Think of it like a slightly gay version of t Facebook. This is like writing on my Facebook wall, writing on your talk page is like replying to something I wrote on your Facebook wall. That second one is the norm. ::Other things we do: put new messages at the bottom of all the others, and give them a title with two equals signs before and after, just to break things up.

A really important thing that I didn't notice for a long time when I got here: at the top of the page you have a link that says "watchlist". This notifies you any time a page you have "touched" (i.e. edited) is touched by someone else. Among other things, that is how you know when people reply to you on their talk pages. For example now, if you reply to my message on your talkpage, I will see that on my watchlist. --Leverage (talk) 20:48, 26 September 2014 (UTC)

2nd VFH noms?

How do I nom articles for a 2nd time if they failed years ago (6 in the case of one I want to put up)? The nom button thing doesn't work. --Nikau (talk) 09:45, 27 September 2014 (UTC)

Have you seen the bold bit of the instruction? If that doesn't work, I don't know what's up.

You (yes, you!) can nominate an article for featuring. To do so, put its name - or article name (2nd nomination) if it's been nominated before - into the box below, press Nominate, and follow the instructions on the next page. Simple! <createbox>

type=create
prefix=Uncyclopedia:VFH/
preload=Template:Vote_table
editintro=Template:Nom_Start
width=25
buttonlabel=Nominate

</createbox>

Leverage (talk) 10:16, 27 September 2014 (UTC)

You missed happy monkey...

Dance the mash bro!

...so please consider this one. Last Year's was fun. Uncyclopedias preeminent writer's presence would honour us Leverage!!!!! --ShabiDOO 03:00, 29 September 2014 (UTC)

Competition starts NOW! You have a week. Go here to pick your topic.

Leverage could you do me a favour and mark three of the topics on the topic list for me (basically give me a short list of three) to chose from? It's only fair since I created the long list...and it would make it more challenging for me (if you don't mind) --ShabiDOO 18:42, 2 October 2014 (UTC)

Time to [[1]]. --ShabiDOO 06:19, 12 October 2014 (UTC)

Thanks for participating. Let's do this again soooooooooooooooooon --ShabiDOO 10:38, 15 October 2014 (UTC)

My main man

I'm glad you signed up. Rock and roll. I'm not putting it in forums cause it's an informal friendly competition. Could you do me a favour and please close this and this per user request? Thanks --ShabiDOO 21:39, 29 September 2014 (UTC)

nice work

On UnBooks:Mr Happy's Bible Primer, did you do all these images yourself? They're really good.   ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 10:40 10.01.14

Thanks dude. I think the first one I found and left it as is. Then I found a picture of Mr Happy and Mr Sad and just kind of resized them in an edited version of the original's background. Whole thing took like 15 mins and I thought it looked better. Leverage (talk) 07:56, 2 October 2014 (UTC)

Congartullatians. No, cangartilations. No, conra-

All my félicitations, Leverage, for winning the most prestigious award of Uncyclopedia! Or at least, one of those. In any case, congratulations! Anton (talk) 17:12, 3 October 2014 (UTC)

Douchebag forgot to deliver the pin. Jk lol   ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 22:37 10.03.14

	Uncyclopedian of the Month September 2014

Awards

Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome!

So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. Let us all clap for him because I said so.

Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage!

Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs.

Fin.

  ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 22:34 10.03.14

Hey Leverage

I'm going to extend the competition by three more days (so that we get more than three completed artiles). You can write a second article if you like (to have another entry in the competition) or we will give you a bonus point or two for finishing on time. Okay? --ShabiDOO 07:22, 8 October 2014 (UTC)

Free game.

If you want, you could make an article on Hitler's secret addiction to crystal meth. It's in the news.   ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 03:21 10.13.14

Admin stuff

There's some awesome super-cool admin stuff going down (there's gonna be a meeting and everything), and I still haven't gotten you set up with an email account and a cabal wiki login, so if you could come on IRC at your earliest convenience, that'd be cool. I'm available evenings after 21:00 my time; I'm GMT -7, so I guess that would be... 4:00 your time... (>_<).  ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Fri, Oct 17 '14 14:25 (UTC)

Bizzee, are you a Best Coast boy? I didn't know. I may very well be over there next summer, we should totally have a cagey and uncomfortable meeting, perhaps in a Target. It's now 1am your time, so I hope you are not awake. But I will pop on just in case. Leverage (talk) 08:04, 18 October 2014 (UTC)

Whoops missed you. I'm in the Mountain Daylight Time (MDT) zone. I'll try to remember to be on tonight... my time. I'm usually up nights (my time) anyway. ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Sat, Oct 18 '14 19:21 (UTC)

Well, I'm a terrible person, but you already knew that. Let's try to get this done via email. ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Fri, Oct 31 '14 5:06 (UTC)

Fresh bait

This would make for a killer article, would it not?   ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 22:47 10.22.14

FA queue

Something's gone wrong, because I can't see an article. --Nikau (talk) 08:41, 1 November 2014 (UTC)

UnNews:NFL star apologizes for celebration

Is it about the Muslim guy celebrating with a prayer? It pissed me so much that people would get offended for that. Nice article, I enjoyed it. Mattsnow 19:34, 4 November 2014 (UTC)

Haha! Not exactly, although I did think about writing an article when that happened, along the same lines (i.e. he apologised for the unnecessary chest bump, not for the muslim prayer). I have just been watching a lot of NFL lately, and the amount of showboating is amusing.

I thought the Muslim prayer incident was really pathetic. Sportsman do the sign of the cross and/or bow in prayer ALL THE TIME, and this one in particular wasn't even lengthy or particularly dramatic. That said, I think the whole idea of praying in sport is absurd, and the player in question said something hilarious like "Every time I get a pick (interception) I am going to give thanks to Allah" :-) Leverage (talk) 19:38, 4 November 2014 (UTC)

Yes, like God or Allah would care about a damn football game lol. so retarded! Mattsnow 19:40, 4 November 2014 (UTC)

I think players who give thanks to God or Allah or Satan or whoever believe that their particular deity has blessed them by giving the ability to compete in their sport, not necessarily that their deity is actually smiling on their team. I hope, anyway. Cuz yeah... the alternative would be dumb.  ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Thu, Nov 6 '14 22:55 (UTC)

Aw me-dammit, Aaron Rodgers! Throwing another pick?! You are completely fucking up my fantasy team! I'm gonna owe Vishnu two continents and a temple! Throw to the guys wearing green, you ass!

Thanks for the proofreading on the UnNews! Mattsnow 22:10, 21 November 2014 (UTC)

No worries! I felt like I was intervening. Then I had a look at UnSPIKElopedia to see if they had done any Cosby stories and I noticed your UnNews there, and, by his standards, mine wasn't too much of an edit! Keep warm up there! Leverage (talk) 09:58, 22 November 2014 (UTC)

Re-feature queue

If you want, you can go to Uncyclopedia:Re-feature queue/Nominate and pick one featured article that you wrote to be re-featured. You can also pick three features written by someone else to re-feature. -- Sir Xam Ralco the Mediocre 18:30, 17 November 2014 (UTC)

Apropos of nothing

UnNews:Please contribute to the Uncyclopedia Christmas single

Hi Leverage! Your song is very funny, but are you sure that the new UnNews is needed? You've already posted the same message at Village Dump, VFH, Facebook and the UnTunes page, so I am not sure an article on that will generate more answers and in addition it doesn't add any humour value to the actual UnTunes.

Zombiebaron said we were going to make an actual Christmas album, no? So what I am saying is why so much attention to an individual song? Maybe let's focus on writing more? Anton (talk) 17:26, 6 December 2014 (UTC)

My thinking was that the other things were likely to be seen by regular users, but the UnNews might catch the more casual browser because it's on the front page. That will be the end of my whoring.

""As for the other songs, I have only seen one, and it's just a set of lyrics. I am not sure how many (if any) more will get recorded. As for the writing, well, if everyone wrote as much as I do, it'd be the busiest wiki in town. Leverage (talk) 17:48, 6 December 2014 (UTC)

Oh, you're so modest! :) Just joking, you're doing a great job and I entirely agree with the last phrase. But we all have different writing style, and I personally, just can't write quickly. Anton (talk) 17:52, 6 December 2014 (UTC)

Ok, I've spent an hour and a half composing something, that was supposed to be a song for our Christmas album. And you know what, I was pretty inspired. Now, I am putting it in my userspace just to prove to you that it's better when some people don't write. (See here, if you want to read it, and please, could you delete the page, if you're done?) Actually, if you feel inspired in any way by the idea of turning Summertime Sadness into Christmastime Sadness, then please do whatever you want with the idea! You'll manage one hundred times better! Anton (talk) 13:52, 7 December 2014 (UTC)

Nice work. Far better than I could manage in my second language, I imagine. I have to pass on the remake, however, as I detest Ms Del Rey for irrational reasons. Leverage (talk) 00:03, 8 December 2014 (UTC)

Thanks. And what is your second language? Anton (talk) 17:07, 8 December 2014 (UTC)

UnTunes:God Screw You Royally, Gentlemen

I don't have the time or ability to sing this, so could you please do it? (since we all know how good you are) This is the best instrumental version I know, so unless it sounds really bad with it, could you please sing with this?

Also, you don't have to take heed of this, but could you please sing through it a few times, employing stereo effects to great extent, to sound like a small choir? --EveryOtherUsernameWasTaken(get dtf) 23:28, 11 December 2014 (UTC)

I sang your lyrics as written, though some I didn't get ("Not so she came"?) and I didn't do the repeat on the chorus cos it was a very fast version.

Leverage (talk) 09:08, 12 December 2014 (UTC)

I love it! "She didn't not so she came" was probably my least tactfully written line. To make it work properly in my head I would have "didn't" monosyllabic, so "dint". It only barely works but then again so do many lines from the original carol. I think you managed well on the line anyway. Feel free to change lyrics if you have better ideas, but only if you are prepared to sing the thing again.

I varied slightly from the original chorus, which goes "o tidings of co-homfort and joy, comfort and joy" into the more tongue-twister prone "o shitloads of paperwork and bills, papers and bills", which is because I felt "papers" could be interpreted not only as "paperwork" but also newspapers or Rizla papers.

My only criticism of the recording as a whole was that your voice and the organ music didn't cohere, so it came as a shock when you started singing, and had I not written the words myself I would have taken a minute before I began to understand them. I had an idea that, to go with the cover art, it could sound old and crackly. I could do this myself but it would probably be better to go through all the individual channels than to just manipulate the thing as a whole. --EveryOtherUsernameWasTaken(get dtf) 16:48, 12 December 2014 (UTC)

I just noticed that on the third and fourth lines you sing "Why did you get her pregnant I'll----make a-hall of you pay" when I think a better rhythm would be "Why did you get her pre-hegnant----I'll make all of you pay". Sorry to be so pedantic about it; you probably think I ought to sing it if I know what I want and how, but you must understand that I would receive curious and strange looks from the other people in my house. --EveryOtherUsernameWasTaken(get dtf) 16:59, 12 December 2014 (UTC)

I didn't really know the hymn, and I only have 20 minutes to do it, so I kind of picked it up during the second verse of the first take, and just kind of left it. I ahve sent you the mp3s of the vocals and the instrumental so you can tinker with thinga. Leverage (talk) 17:51, 12 December 2014 (UTC)

Uncyclopedia:The Article Whisperer

Hi Leverage! Do you think it'll be possible to advertise the upcoming event on Uncyclopedia's Facebook account (maybe even UnNews, if you feel that it fits with other posts)? Also, would you know who is in charge of our Twitter? Anton (talk) 13:23, 20 December 2014 (UTC)

Hotadmin4u269 is in charge of both the Facebook and the Twitter pages, I am only in charge of UnNews! I'll take a look at the article, as long as it's not too different, I will put it up there! Leverage (talk) 22:09, 20 December 2014 (UTC)

Thanks! Only, we don't have an article yet, only the idea. It would be good if we could invite our outside readers to participate in The Article Whisperer! Anton (talk) 14:52, 21 December 2014 (UTC)

By the way, I've just listened to the new Do they know it's Christmas audio and it's great. Very nice job putting everything together, I had a lot of fun listening to different voices and trying to imagine Uncyclopedians with different senses of humour from all parts of the world putting their efforts together into the recording of one song. Anton (talk) 20:59, 24 December 2014 (UTC)

Haha cool dude, thanks! Merry Christmas, New Year, Orthodox Christmas, old New Year, and all those other things Russians do this time of year! Leverage (talk) 21:14, 24 December 2014 (UTC)

Oh, I entirely forgot about the old New Year. Thanks for reminding me and same to you! Anton (talk) 15:34, 25 December 2014 (UTC)

Uncyclopedia of the Year

Thank you for the nomination! It is really appreciated. Anton (talk) 08:28, 3 January 2015 (UTC)

2014 features

Hello stranger, and the best of the New Years to you and your loved ones (which, I assume, includes all of us). I'm also assuming you had the most features in 2014, how many? I've been away. And if I'm wrong please let me know (you or someone). This is to update and award the Fake Pegasus Award. Aleister 16:08 10 1 15

Thank you ally! Happy New Year to you, you have been missed round these parts (my parts). I just looked at my hall of fame, looks like i got 14 features in 2014. I had no idea, I don't nominate or do any of that jazz. Nikau got about 10 in the last 10 weeks the little stinker. --Leverage (talk) 17:42, 10 January 2015 (UTC)

Fake Pegasus Award ceremony

And for the most features in 2014 (unless someone had more) you are awarded the Fake Pegasus Award, a truly unfine and totally unknown award. Well deserved, my good man, a fine fellow, and a fine flying horse, well met. Aleister 19:00 10 January, 2015

2014 Fake Pegasus Award for most featured articles of the year

Now I wish I had encouraged Leverage to stay away from Uncyclopedia in 2012. Happy New Year Leverage. --RomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 14:40, 11 January 2015 (UTC)

Thanks for voting for Nothing's syndrome!

Spread the word! ~EveryOtherUsernameWasTaken(dtf?) 17:39, 25 February 2015 (UTC)

Still going strong

Poor Angelina....leave that poor woman alone Leverage! Good luck here. --RomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 15:04, 24 March 2015 (UTC)

I don't know about strong, but still going! We got a string of likes on the UnNews Facebook page so I was kind of guilt-tripped into writing something. I don't know how Spike spends so much time on the wikia site, he must be living off the fat of the land. --Leverage (talk) 08:46, 25 March 2015 (UTC)

Spike is an anagram of Argus. --RomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 12:30, 2 April 2015 (UTC)

As in, Argus takes care of it? Leverage (talk) 16:09, 2 April 2015 (UTC)

Welcome message

Lol good spot, I usually just copy the one Kippy left on my talkpage when I joined, and this time forgot to change the username. Oops! - B@NZai k!tten (Meow?)B 11:15, 16 April 2015 (UTC)

I saw it in the change summary! Maybe it should be our new convention, to welcome ourselves constantly :-) --Leverage (talk) 11:50, 16 April 2015 (UTC)

I'd just like to take this opportunity to welcome Banzaikitten to Leverage's talkpage. - B@NZai k!tten (Meow?)B 13:22, 16 April 2015 (UTC)

Welcome Leverage!--Leverage (talk) 13:55, 16 April 2015 (UTC)

Here is the code for making their name fill in by itself.

Hello, {{<includeonly>subst:</includeonly>BASEPAGENAME}}, and welcome to Uncyclopedia.

Kip's welcome was just the generic one. You just type {{Template|Welcome}} onto the page and it works.

--Leverage (talk) 07:59, 17 April 2015 (UTC)

Hello

Hi Leverage! Could you, please, check QVFD? There's a lot of undeleted garbage there and I spotted you on recent changes. Anton (talk) 17:14, 21 April 2015 (UTC)

A lot of them are user space articles. They don't seem to be particularly funny, but I don't see them as must-deletes either. I deleted a few that were there. Leverage (talk) 06:13, 22 April 2015 (UTC)

Actually some of the user space articles were requests from the user, so I did delete them!--Leverage (talk) 09:19, 22 April 2015 (UTC)

Thanks! Anton (talk) 09:56, 22 April 2015 (UTC)

Today's feature

Hey Leverage. I'm having the same problem updating the feature queue. I looked at what you did in the history but I can't figure out what the issue is. Do you mind taking a look? MadMax (talk) 01:07, 7 May 2015 (UTC)

Both times I just went back to the Vfh page and featured it again, copying and pasting your summary. No idea why that worked. Given that it's so sleepy here at the moment, i still think we should randomise the features (Forum:Today's feature - randomising) Leverage (talk) 06:10, 7 May 2015 (UTC)

Hi

Hi Leverage I have been considering sending you some sort of message for a while but in all honesty I'm afraid of triggering you leaving the website as you are probably the most active writer, although inaction on mine or anyone's part could have a similar effect. Uninspired as I am on how to correctly construct a sentence that will impart what I think needs to be imparted, I decided to send you a small log of dreaded IRC that I believe sums up my feelings, although took a poll of whether to send it first. This pastebin http://pastebin.com/YMpZSY2p links to a strawpoll in which voters decided (an overwhelming victory) I should link you the pastebin in which a link to a pastebin which contains IRC logs is, which is here http://pastebin.com/FdqvVxh9 . By the way, please take our jests with a pinch of salt, we love you intensely. - B@NZai k!tten (Meow?)B 09:33, 26 May 2015 (UTC)

I don't really get the chat or the tiptoeing nature of your above message. It all reads like mountains and molehills. I don't go on irc because i don't really use chatrooms full stop, and if i did, it would be to entice some black girl to strip on cam for me. and i wasn't angry when i posted on the forum, i was just trying to nudge people into writing, and i think it's kind of shitty when all these "founders" of the fork do nothing but chat and write ironic posts. Admittedly Uncyclopedia articles take a while to write and I suspect a lot of people have little time to sit and write one, but an Unnews can be knocked out in 20 mins, and I think if say, 20 users regularly did little articles here and there, it would have a snowball effect. The site is currently a chatroom with a website attached, rather than the other way around. Leverage (talk) 14:21, 26 May 2015 (UTC)

The tiptoeing nature was just a joke which in retrospect was confusing and needless but was relevant to the irc log I did want to post, assuming you managed to navigate the maze of pastebin and read the log. I know you aren't angry, you just seemed a bit confused and disheartened about the arrival of so many people on that forum. I just reckon if you wanted to understand wtf was going on a bit better you could come into the IRC, like why the "founders" don't post and why a random forum gets so much attention, it's like there's a whole part of the community you've never experienced. I never used chatrooms or anything before I joined uncyclopedia. And people do talk about uncyclopedia related things in there (sometimes) it's just most of us are either busy or highly unmotivated to follow anything through. A motivated person like yourself could rile some action, much like Lythyria was able to rouse a bunch of "big names" into posting on her forum my making a bit of noise on the IRC. Also I just think it would be nice to get to know you a bit better (no homo), I find leaving messages on talkpages so impersonal. I agree that the IRC often gets more activity than the website and that most of us are a bunch of lazy bastards, but hell if I know what to do about it. I try to get an UnNews or little article out when I find the time and motivation but they are both decreasing. At the end of the day though, do what you like mate, just thought I'd try and shed some light. - B@NZai k!tten (Meow?)B 21:29, 26 May 2015 (UTC)

P.S I don't know about a black girl but we have a white girl who will strip probably for you. - B@NZai k!tten (Meow?)B 21:29, 26 May 2015 (UTC)

Aliana y los Enanitos Grandes

Aliana Confia... is supposed to mean Aliana Trusts the Astronaut with Sweets. In the sense that the astronaut has sweets and Aliana trusts him, as opposed to Aliana trusting an astronauts over the issue of sweets. By the way I really appreciate you doing this. ~EveryOtherUsernameWasTaken(dtf?) 20:30, 29 May 2015 (UTC)

Ok, I have plumped for Aliana confia en el cosmonauta con los caramelos. Cosmonauta is obviously cosmonaut, maybe that's funnier, I don't know. If not, astronauta. I also decapitalised the titles, which looks weirder, perhaps, but is what they do on Spanish wikipedia. Leverage (talk) 08:06, 30 May 2015 (UTC)

Lifting

Since Kip the Dip is not answering my query, you are aware the Glastonbury story is Codeine's at the Spoon. I know with this licensing thing people can in theory copy and paste other people's articles between the Spoon and the Fork but it is not something I approve of over there and would delete if alerted to it. This goes back to an agreement I forged with RAHB back in 2013 on a discussion page here. I am guessing this is no longer operative or is an oversight? --RomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 08:11, 29 June 2015 (UTC)

Songs

Like most users, I haven't really written anything here in a while. But outside of Uncyc (in a little notebook) I have been writing, mainly comic songs. The problem is that I want to contribute here but I can't think of anything to write that would be suitable (basically we need another competition). Anyway, if you're interested I'd like to share some ideas and stuff I've written here, in case you think they could substantiate stuff. ~EveryOtherUsernameWasTaken(dtf?) 14:33, 4 July 2015 (UTC)

I think anything would be welcome on UnTunes. Send me some links and I will check them out.Leverage (talk) 16:43, 6 July 2015 (UTC)

I've typed two up: UnTunes:I'm Disgusting, and That's Got You Hot and UnTunes:I Eat Babies. A lot of what I'd written was just rogue verses. ~EveryOtherUsernameWasTaken(dtf?) 11:45, 8 July 2015 (UTC)

Hello

I demand to know why you put images of breasts on the main page. I consider this immature. Sorry if that's bad, I just do. MyOwnBadSelf (talk) 07:43, 13 July 2015 (UTC)

It was a boobie trap. Leverage (talk) 12:04, 13 July 2015 (UTC)

Is VFH completely redundant now? - B@NZai k!tten (Meow?)B 16:06, 13 July 2015 (UTC)

*sigh*Bad puns aside, it does make editing at work a little difficult. hahahaha. The Woodburninator The vote was legitimate! ™ 16:10, 13 July 2015 (UTC)

It looked like a shitty porn website. Mattsnow 16:20, 13 July 2015 (UTC)

I was almost fired this morning. - B@NZai k!tten (Meow?)B 16:33, 13 July 2015 (UTC)

Wait, people here have jobs? I thought we were all prisoners killing time. I have since replaced the boobs with a flagrant homosexual. Which you also get in prison. Leverage (talk) 17:17, 13 July 2015 (UTC)

Oh and I don't know if vfh is redundant. but i put the pics up because the page had gone blank (again) and i thought something was better than nothing. when a page has enough votes of vfh (one has 7 now, kind of borderline) it can go on there. Leverage (talk) 17:19, 13 July 2015 (UTC)

Haha, booby trap. But thanks for adding the Oscar Wilde picture instead. MyOwnBadSelf (talk) 23:00, 13 July 2015 (UTC)

I like your article

The 10 childhood stars one. It made me chuckle a bunch. I'm wondering if there might be a better way to end it though. Were you content with the writer quitting the article halfway through, or are you open to changing some things? Either way, nice job taking a half-idea from an ip and making something really good out of it. The Woodburninator The vote was legitimate! ™ 19:57, 13 July 2015 (UTC)

It was a slightly tedious one to do, cos I had to upload lots of different files. I think that's why I had the writer bail out on it. I am totally open to it being edited and extended. I got the photos from http://www.sportfluff.com/10-cute-child-stars-that-grew-up-ugly/ Leverage (talk) 07:00, 14 July 2015 (UTC)

'We're All Nazis then'

Very good! I think the 'Greek' still is! Leverage! --RomArtus*Imperator ITRA (Orate) ® 13:29, 18 July 2015 (UTC)

Contacting a porn professional

Hi Leverage, I was looking at our porn page and was very much disappointed to observe that no picture jumped at me from the computer screen and instead there was a pretty sad bit of prose (in addition, identical to the Wikia one, which doesn't give it credit). So I thought, how come none of our porn writers did anything about it? I think this page would go with a "decent" "clean-up" and rewrite. And guess who was the first person who came to my mind?

What I think this page needs is little text and some surprises achieved through formatting tricks, which you happen to master! My idea would be to have fake porn images invade the reader's screen like in Microsoft Knowledge Base (the only difference being that MKB doesn't actually have porn images). If you could help with the formatting and "proper" images, I'd be willing to work on the text (unless you'd wish to have fun with it, too). So, would you be interested? Anton (talk) 17:01, 20 July 2015 (UTC)

It could be cute. I like the idea of using lots of images that aren't actually dirty but look it - like this kind of stuff. And maybe the article could even open on a blank page inviting the user to click on it, eventually leading to the main article via "pop ups" and stuff. Leverage (talk) 18:31, 20 July 2015 (UTC)

Nice work on your image! Very funny. Just a suggestion, though: your terms of use seem be to pretty serious, apart from a few places, and the notes. So maybe, instead of making the reader scroll down to see all the jokes at once, integrate the comments to your body text? For instance, you could say something like "By clicking on this button, you testify that you agree to eighteen adults not offended by sexually explicit material coming to your home, and that you will be ready to testify in court that you were consentant to be forced to watch sexually explicit material." Maybe also omit the term "sexual", because "explicit" leaves more room for humour, as you can interpret it in several ways? And I really like what you've done, I just wanted to propose some ideas. Anton (talk) 20:08, 20 July 2015 (UTC)

I totally like the idea of non-porn images that look like porn with no real nudity or porn. The writing in the article could be that way too. I'm admin of Discordian Wiki and edit SubGenius Wikia Clench where I have to follow Wikia's Prudery Policy, so I'm doing some stuff like that too, like the pie throwing lady clown called Connie Cream Pie. DAP Dame Pleb Com. Miley Spears (talk) 04:47, 21 July 2015 (UTC)

3 1/2 votes

Shouldn't the vote total on this be 3 1/2 instead of 3? http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/Uncyclopedia:VFH/UnNews:Saudi_blogger:_10th_round_of_flogging_cancelled DAP Dame Pleb Com. Miley Spears (talk) 04:37, 21 July 2015 (UTC)

Yes. I still thought it's time had come, though. Leverage (talk) 07:06, 21 July 2015 (UTC)

HMC2015

No [Monkey] this year? ShabiDOO 16:38, 31 July 2015 (UTC)

I have been spending all my time on Pornography and I am all spunked out, creatively. I am happy it is around though, I will keep an eye on the entries. --Leverage (talk) 21:45, 1 August 2015 (UTC)

Features

Hello Leverage, sorry for distracting you from your pornography, but I wanted to ask if I could try featuring UnNews:Celtic F.C sign youth player in transfer mix up (its score is 6/0), seeing we haven't had a feature in the past 6 days. I also wanted to know at what time of day you are supposed to feature articles, as a general rule.

And finally, thank you for your support at the op forum! Anton (talk)

I mean, are you supposed to feature an article in the evening so it gets displayed on the main page the next day or the morning of the day you want the article to be featured? Anton (talk) 13:53, 3 August 2015 (UTC)

Congratulations on the promotion. I will leave the featuring to you, it takes some practice! Given that we rarely feature stuff, I always just feature articles using today's date. In with the new, and all that. I think timing was more of a factor back when features would change every day. --Leverage (talk) 20:29, 3 August 2015 (UTC)

I did it! And I hope I did it right. Anton (talk) 23:02, 3 August 2015 (UTC)

Good job! --Leverage (talk) 15:16, 5 August 2015 (UTC)