From today's featured article
Melvin Cucumber Gibson LW (1270 - ∞) is a drunk American film director who is about to direct the upcoming unnamed sequel to Joker, and also all the rest of the sequels. Among those sequels will probably be titles such as JJ84, The Naked Joker 666.67, etc. Gibson is also a famed actor and drunk person, and the director of Apocalypto and Braveheart. As mentioned before, Gibson is also a drunk director with the ability to get away with anything using the fact that he is drunk. For this reason, Gibson has been chosen to direct the sequel to Joker, which is the most unnecessary movie of all time. (Full article...)
Did you know...
- ... that the Silver Surfer has a very large family? (Pictured)
- ... that suicide is an answer to every problem, just not a very good one?
- ... that if we used a language without homonyms, a certain type of pun would be impossible, and thereby much gaiety would be lost?
- ... that Alexander isn't really that Great?
- ... that under Communism, everyone gets a C?
- ... that we must nuke the whales, or the hippies will win?
- ... that the United States presidential election of 1948 saw the overwhelming defeat of then-President Harry S. Truman at the hands of Thomas Dewey, the Republican governor of New York and former partner in the law firm, Dewey, Cheatem & Howe?
- ... that the only thing money can't buy is poverty?
In the news
- O.J. Simpson to make triumphant return to acting (Pictured)
- Citizen Kane sucks
- John Kerry comes out as a horse
- Supermarket thief: "Donkey Kong told me to"
- Mike Pence turns into a pickle
- It is all happening
- Lady Gaga's dogs stolen, returned
- Björk responds to Anti-Asian violence
- Stan Marsh presents: 2022 FIFA World Cup sucks ass
- Biden responds to North Korea's "Stink" complaints
- BMI songwriters (but not ASCAP) to receive vaccine
- Governor Cuomo from New York is screwed
- Grodin Museum reopens to public
- Old movies are suddenly offensive
- Northeast getting another blizzard
- Just another dead doper and a dirtbag dies
- Marilyn Manson removed from New Radicals hit
- Biden will recognize Hillary as 45th President
On this day
August 3: Vague Day:
- Way too long ago – Some large lizards were forgotten off the face of the earth... or something...
- A long time ago – Some guy was born.
- A little more recent – Some guy did something important. The guy with the hair.
- hmmm – Uh... dang... <pffft>
- Way back when – The guy who wears clothes invented that thing that people use.
- A while ago – Two countries started a war. You know, that famous one with that big battle where a bunch of people died.
- I can't quite recall – I think there was a battle.
- Back before I was born – Some guy became the leader of some country.
- In the good old days – France was invaded by a certain foreign power.
- Sometime – Some lady called and left a message.
- That one time, at band camp – Some rich dude went and did something or other to this one website
- Then – Some famous guy or Some famous lady did something funny.
- The other day – Someone did something.
- The Other Other Day – this guy did something amazing
- A little later – This other guy went somewhere
- At some point – This one guy may or may not have done something that might be considered noteworthy in some circles.
- Like, whenEVER – 'kay, like you remember that guy from the commercial with the, um, thing on his head? No, the OTHER one. Well, he gets shot I think, no, actually I meant assaulted in some way, by some other guy, or girl, and it's was sooooo all over the TV, or radio? I guess it took place somewhere.
- Not too long ago – Poor people demolish a wall to create a bit more living space somewhere.
- Around 1995 – That TV show is cancelled. You know, the one with that guy, always wore a shirt... c'mon, help me out here.
- Y'know, that day – That guy, with the hat, and that other guy, they do those things they do, y'know, with the monkey, and the bar, and that hat they always used in the ... the uh, commercials.
- Two days before the Day after Tommorrow – Your Mom did something that she usually only does on Saturday nights up at Nob Hill.
- When was it again? – People could vaguely remember when is Vague Day
- Around that one time – You vaguely remember what happened that one night.
- A long time from now in a galaxy far, far away – Some dude invents some thing that does something that for some reason makes him meet some alien race somewhere.
- Sometime between the beginning and end of time – someone avoids direct answer
- Just recently – This joke about being vague got really old.
- around nowish – Something about something vague was vaguely reborn like that one guy long ago.
Picture of the day
Other areas of Uncyclopedia
- How to be funny and not just stupid – for help with that comedy thing
- Policies and guidelines — for the boring rules no one follows
- Formatting – for help on editing
- Requested articles – for inspiration, or lack thereof
- Village Dump – to throw angry invectives at other users
- Community portal – for general community shenanigans
News on crack
The content-free encyclopedia
Best left unsaid
Ways to waste away
Like Ikea without the pictures
No student loans
Debate the irrelevant
We ruin stage too
- More than 10,000 articles: Português · Boarisch · 日本語 · Polski · Plattdüütsch · Italiano · Español
- More than 1,000 articles: Français · Suomi · Dansk · Deutsch · 한국어 · 正體中文 · 汉语 · Русский · Norsk (Bokmål) · Bahasa Indonesia · Česky · ไทย · Esperanto · Ελληνικά · Nederlands · Galego · עברית · Svenska · Slovenčina · Magyar · Українська
- More than 100 articles: فارسی · عَرَبِيّ · Türkçe · Català · Norsk (Nynorsk) · Српски / Srpski · Hrvatski · Lietuvių · Latina · Tagalog · Български · Simple English · Latviešu · Mirandés · Македонски · Română · Cymraeg