User:Science blows

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search
This entire page is Top Secret. Please avert your eyes.

TheJeeMan.jpg
Jesus Loves This Page

The Jee Man Himself has Shown, in His infinite Wisdom, that He is the Ultimate Purveyor of all things Awesome, Nifty, Spiffy, and generally Interesting. He has personally Reviewed this page and Given His Blessing. The submitter may be Forgiven three venial sins or one mortal sin.


Get a life[edit | edit source]

This man,they call Scienceblows....[edit | edit source]

A man,a myth,a legend.He is thought to have started this little place we call home,we're unaware of his birth place. But people around the world know him.Everyone around the world has been on a 270 year expedition to find him. Some say he's in all of us. Some say he's not real. Others just say fuck off. But we have quite possibly the very first real sighting ever seen of him. And we're showing it to you now.

This is supposedly Scienceblows in his natural habitat

Aw fuck,you did it now[edit | edit source]

It's been said,that every 1,000 years. on this day, this very day. that Scienceblows pays a visit to all that have done good in this life. There have been many reported sightings of seeing a holy being with a name tag stating "scienceblows",but,then again most of them were crackheads,or druggies,or alchohalics,or just anything.

possibly the ancient scripts?

The followers[edit | edit source]

There is a vast group of people who are on a hunt to find this man. they are called "P.O.T.H.O.S" otherwise known as "people on the hunt on science". Theses people are bastards,and will fuck up anyone who tries to stop them. This thing has been going on for 200 hundred years and been passed down from generation,to generation. people tend to believe the man who started this all was a descendant of Scienceblows,no one is for sure. We have found ancient scripts believed to be a religion book of the P.O.T.H.O.S

The Country named after this god of sorts[edit | edit source]

yes,this guy had his very own country. How? They found a vacant land,took it,bought a flag and called it Sciencia.what dumbasses.It's located near Iceland,why? Because,they wanted it to be. It's been overly populated for 13 yrs. now,and now every year they make a sacrifice to the god, and see if it pleases him. It never does,people just do it because it gives them a reason to streak the whole island naked while humping various objects. I have 12 of those on tape, i could show you the- o wait,i'm writing a biography. Now back to this. Their currency they use are menus from places. People enjoy the scent of them. It's true,check it on wikipedia. Woo hoo! advertising. anyways,this place is amazing. free drinks,free food,free money,free cars,free chicks. EVERYTHING. go there,please? ...we haven't had any tourists after the great Alli-hunt in 42'. Why is it called that?....someone got eaten by our giant alligator. It's one of the flaws to this island.

Sweet Jumping Jesus,It's Scienceblows!
Young.jpg
Scientific classification
KingdomAbsolute awesome
PhylumThe one that is the neatest
ClassBaconator
OrderORDER OF NEIGH!!!
FamilyBlow your mind
Genusmy fist to your face
SpeciesAmazingopard
Binomial name
this one
Specifications
Primary armamentthat one
Secondary armamentthe other one
Power supplyFighting ghosts with lemons and or pineapples
Health1000x your face
ManaMasturbation power!
StrengthI can lift cars,bitch
Intelligencesnake....Snake! SNAKE!!!!!!
WeightWell,how much does a train weigh?
LengthTaller then space
Special attackamazing mindfuck
Conservation status
Extinct!