Babel:Ch

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Maozilla (alternately called Mao Tsilla; not to be confused with Mozilla) is a mythical communist monster, created from the DNA of Chairman Mao's chin mole. A symbol of the Communist Party's greatness and power, Maozilla disappeared after his defeat against Godzilla in 1969. He returned in 1989, and once again champions the values of communism and eating anything that moves. It is believed another Maozilla once existed in Blood Gulch in 1973, but he caused little damage: as the game resulted in a tie, all the players quit in disgust, leaving Maozilla in the cold depths of the Internet.

This has absolutely positively NOTHING to do with Mozilla. Even though the actual page of Mozilla says that Mozilla is a DIRECT DESCENDANT of Maozilla (which she is, but I'm not going to admit it), I'm going to vehemently reject that fact. (Full article...)

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Selected anniversaries

Nothing's gonna change my world, nothing's gonna change my world.

April 26: Hyperbole Day!

  • 1764 - Hyperbole day founded in the most spectacular ceremony since the dawn of time.
  • 1834 - The best day in all of history! There'll never ever be another day like it! It's amazing! Not like I'd tell you, though.
  • 1901 - President Teddy Roosevelt mounts his wife: BULLY!
  • 1965 - The mildest day in the history of the universe. No other day was as mild. Ever. Aside from the racism.
  • 1983 - The worst day in the history of the universe, God himself mourns. (Pictured)
  • 1986 - Ronald Reagan stays awake for an entire cabinet meeting! Good job, Mr. President! Let the void take you!
  • 2016 - The best night I've ever had. Ever! It felt so good! Say goodbye to cats!


Archived Anniversaries

Things happening in the rest of the world, which didn't make us a profit.


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Eh?

Ongoing: The wait for GTA VI, Silksong, and DeltaruneEurovisionRussian InvasionIsrael-Palestine conflictDOGE budget cuts • SWAT teams on guard for the "chicken jockey" scene of A Minecraft MovieTrump and Xi's tariff games • The IRS hunting late tax payers

Recent deaths: Kurt from Good BurgerGeorge Foreman23andMeBruce GloverRichard ChamberlainRoger Daltrey's eyes and earsVal KilmerYoon Suk Yeol's presidency and freedom • Your 401KJay North • The 1-game "playoff runs" of the mid-tier NBA teams • SPOILER: Joel • Pope Francis

Upcoming deaths: U.S. and Global Economy • Luigi MangioneKate MiddletonLaura PalmerDEIGawr GuraGoogle's ad monopoly


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Banker of the Month

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Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome!

So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore.

Let us all clap for him because I said so.


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Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage!


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Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls.


Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners



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