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Come in my face, in my hair, Treat me like your little whore, In my ear, in my rear, Till I’m crying out for more, In the car, behind the bar, Up against my bedroom wall, In my bed or in the shed, Till I’m crying out for more. Till I’m crying for more Come between my cheeks, on my feet, Treat me like your little whore, On my toes, up my nose, Till I’m crying out for more Till I’m crying for more And I swear that I won’t tell my mum Solo Till I’m crying for more And I swear that I won’t tell my mum (Full article...) Recently featured: Metalheads 9-11 Shoutbox Clairvoyance among dinosaurs Archive · Vote for featured articles · Did you know... *... that vaccinations and computer games combined make a deadly cocktail for autism? ... that the United States presidential election of 1948 saw the overwhelming defeat of then-President Harry S. Truman at the hands of Thomas Dewey, the Republican governor of New York and former partner in the law firm, Dewey, Cheatem & Howe? ... that vaccinations and computer games combined make a deadly cocktail for autism? ... that the United States presidential election of 1948 saw the overwhelming defeat of then-President Harry S. Truman at the hands of Thomas Dewey, the Republican governor of New York and former partner in the law firm, Dewey, Cheatem & Howe? ... that vaccinations and computer games combined make a deadly cocktail for autism? ... that the United States presidential election of 1948 saw the overwhelming defeat of then-President Harry S. Truman at the hands of Thomas Dewey, the Republican governor of New York and former partner in the law firm, Dewey, Cheatem & Howe? ... that vaccinations and computer games combined make a deadly cocktail for autism?	In the news Trump sends condolences to tough-guy actor "Mikey Madison" (Pictured) Clint Eastwood announces plans to live forever Trumpman introduces Trumpmobile Diddy gets off easy, possibly due to bribing jury Musk establishes "Porky Pig Party" to combat Trump's "Big Beautiful Bill" United Nations Secretary General gives up on world peace, World War Three begins Netanyahu and Khamenei get it on Trump joins in for threesome, blows load Khamenei fails to follow up after dirty talk, taps out Elon Musk breaks up with Trump Trump sends condolences to "Sly Stallone" Trump celebrates TACO Wednesday by reversing course on long-held campaign promise THE ROCKIES HAVE WON A SERIES! Ongoing: The wait for GTA VI, Silksong, TAWOG, Stranger Things 5, and Spaceballs 2 • Russian Invasion • Gaza War • Trump and Elon's feud.. make up.. no one knows anymore • Animal-related live-action remakes kicking Snow White's ass • Jaws 50th anniversary • Colorado Rockies game replacing Jaws airing • Israel/Iran "peace talks" • Pittsburgh Steelers adding old players way past their prime Recent deaths: Ariana Grande's Nonna • Canadian team's bid to win the Stanley Cup, again • PF4Eva's headphone cable • Jimmy Swaggart • Diddy's freedom for only 20 years • Michael Madsen • Diogo Jota Upcoming deaths: DEI • Tom Cruise's career of sprinting on-screen • Pittsburgh Steelers' locker room • Greta Thunberg? • R. Kelly • Iran's nuclear program • Oil prices • Dumbasses with fireworks in their backyards • Diddy's bank account after incoming lawsuits • The asshats who spoiled Squid Game On this day... July 6: Man Milk Day 3100 BC – Village idiot starts sucking on a cow's titty; discovers milk. 2300 BC – Chinese religious officers declared that drinking milk is a sin. 1609 – Bohemia is granted freedom of religion. The Bohemians snap their fingers in approval. 1732 – The 'Running of the Bulls' Festival in Pamploma, originally, 'The Drowning of the Animals' Festival, undergoes Major overhaul. PETA established. 1946 – George W. Bush born; record numbers of brain death recorded in America. 1977 – Idiot deems day "Man Milk Day" and proceeds to schedule lame events (Editor advises they read the article "How To Be Funny And Not Just Stupid") 1978 – Margaret Thatcher blesses the first man to be milked. 1986 – Mike Portnoy founded the band Dream Theater 1988 – Shemales riot near Rio de Janeiro to obtain the rights for selling their milk to earn a living. 1996 – Mike Portnoy travels back in time to found the band Dream Theater 2004 – Man Milk is found to be an excellent source of energy for athletes. Naturally, using it in this fashion is outlawed by the U.N. under pressure by the Gatorade overlords of the universe. 2006 – San Seattle Riot kills 6 Caloringtons
Featured picture It was a sad sad day in the Mediterranean region, as thousands of Porchesians were incinerated by the Wikipedia adminatti, who deny the incident ever took place, and indeed, the existence of Porchesia. Image credit: RadicalX View image · Nominate new image · View all featured images
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Writer and Noob of the Month Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome! So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore. Let us all clap for him because I said so. Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage! Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls. Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners