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FEATURED FAVORITES I awoke with a start and reached for my alarm clock, still screaming away at me into the side of my head. The sound was excruciating, boring a hole into my significantly small brain and rattling it within my cavernous skull. Unable to reach the alarm clock, I rolled myself over to it, but lost control and fell off of my bed. "Still gotta get used to this damned tail." I cursed through my teeth and kicked the clock into the corner, which must have either stopped the alarm or destroyed the entire clock. In addition to my tail, my powerful legs were something else I still hadn't adjusted to yet. (Full article...) Recently featured: Kitten Vaping Mona Lisa Robbie Rotten Mosque Archive · Vote for featured articles ·

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Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome!

So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore.

Let us all clap for him because I said so.

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Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage!

Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls.

Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

  ZZZZ I L    K  K  OO    Zilko won some award!!
    Z  I L    KKK  O  O   Click Here to see Zilko, the greatest Newspaper Magazine.
   Z   I L    KKK  O  O   
  ZZZZ I LLLL K  K  OO                    (C) UnZeta/Rabdon Entertainment 2021

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To be completely honest,
I didn't get those awards.