User talk:Under user/Archive 24

lobster

man, i don't know what our main voter base is thinking. i thought for sure that once Lobster found itself on VFH that it'd be a sure thing. anyway, i still think it's probably the best thing i've ever contributed to on this site. in that spirit, would you care to collaborate again on a project once this PLS is finished? SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 07:43, October 18, 2009 (UTC)

Yeah, sometimes you hit what you think is a six, and it comes down right in the hands of a fielder. Swap "six" for "homer" and "fielder" for something like "deep left fieldsman" if you find baseball analogies easier to follow than cricket ones. I knew Romartus would vote against - that's almost a given - I'm a bit surprised by some of the others. I agree, I think it's one of the funniest things I've been involved with as well, but who can tell how people are going to vote? As I mentioned somewhere up this rapidly-lengthening talk page, I'd love to work with you one something Gerry, but I am pretty hopeless at collabs. The one I did with Mordillo was gestating for almost a year, and the one I was supposed to work on with DJI is pretty much stillborn, with about 4 lines of text. Fish Puns didn't do too badly though, I suppose. If you think we can make something work given your grad school stuff and my occasional bursts of writing, then let's do it - any ideas? --UU - natter 09:24, Oct 18

Gerald, I'm confused - people are now talking about in-jokes, and it being hard to read. Did they get past the second section, do you think? I'm not annoyed it's not gonna get featured - just genuinely puzzled as to some of those votes. Any thoughts on them yourself? Also, any ideas for another collab we can not get featured? My meagre list of ideas is here - any of them grab you, or do you have any betterer ones? --UU - natter 17:42, Oct 19

PEEING Shock!

I glanced at the all-time reviewer's list and when did Chiefjustice suddenly become 2nd? You better watch your back, or you won't be number one for long! :) • • • Necropaxx (T) {~} Tuesday, 05:03, Oct 20

True. Good thing Saber's not competing for 1st. User:Zheliel • Talk 05:09 October 20

I really, really don't care about being first, second or even twentieth on that list. As long as people who want help with their articles are getting decent reviews, I'm a happy camper. (If it bothers you though, don't forget: that's only the reviews checked since Cajek started the list - I'm over 160 and counting. But it still doesn't bother me - honest!) --UU - natter 14:36, Oct 20

Hey

Sorry for the late reply, I've been travelling Europe and sadly therefore Uncyclopedia has been pushed down my priorities list somewhat. I'm in Italy right now and will travel through Austria and Switzerland before coming back home, at which point I might be able to do some reviewing if it still needs to be done. --I can't find a tilde on Italian keyboards – Preceding unsigned comment added by Siddhartha-Wolf (talk • contribs)

No worries Sid - all is in hand again. I just asked on a bunch of talk pages - having fun around Europe is way more important. Enjoy every damn minute of it! --UU - natter 14:41, Oct 20

Raining blood..

..is slayer's greatest piece of thrash metal • FreddThe Redd • • • 14:44, October 20, 2009 (UTC)

Oh man, I sooooo need to hear Angel of Death right now. /me scrabbles for my mp3 player. --UU - natter 14:45, Oct 20

I'm listening to a Vader's cover of raining blood right now.. its like wtf? two times faster.. damn death metal double bass • FreddThe Redd • • • 15:01, October 20, 2009 (UTC)

I'm on to my fucking awesome metal songs playlist right now. Just passed Suicidal Tendencies (War Inside My Head) and on to Machine Head (Davidian). Getting odd looks from the rest of the office as I can't resist the occasional headbang. As I cut my hair off last year, that doesn't work so well these days... --UU - natter 15:09, Oct 20

Same here.. Except that I'm listening to my fucking soothing metal songs playlist. now playing Dream Theater's Finally Free, next is Savatage's Believe.. Also, I had to cut my hair last year.. to give a good impression to my examining committee at college, they said.. bullshit.. It wasn't THAT long • FreddThe Redd • • • 15:16, October 20, 2009 (UTC)

Oh you archived.

But yet you did that sissy-ish part-archiving, cowardly thing. You stand in teh corner and think about what you've done. And cut your hair, you look like a girl.    Orian57    Talk   17:14 20 October 2009

Well, either he archived or had a very neat vandal in here. Pup t 10:08, 21/10/2009

God you're like a girl. How many times in teh past week have you changed your sig?    Orian57    Talk   11:15 21 October 2009

I'm whimsical that way. Pup t 23:50, 21/10/2009

Lobsters and other

I answered your question re my statement about Lobster at User_talk:Why_do_I_need_to_provide_this?#Curious.2C_and_nothing_more. Obviously my opinion is just my opinion, but I do really appreciate you taking the time to listen to a noob! King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  23:40, October 20, 2009 (UTC)

Yeah, if I leave a message somewhere, and I'm interested in the answer, I'll find it if you answer where I asked it - no need for anything like this (just for future reference!) But thanks - appreciate a response. --UU - natter 09:31, Oct 21

Lekker lekker

Just thought you would like to know and in case you missed it on Sonje's talk, lekker is actually a word used daily by South Africans. It can be translated as meaning "nice". But it is sometimes used in the same context as "cool" would be used. And you would get pretty far with only that one word in South Africa. Provided you read the article on Survival I am going to write when I am done with Julius. Lekker man --BlueSpiritGuy 13:48, October 21, 2009 (UTC)

But having said that lekkerbrot isn't lekker at all. Bleargh! Pup t 23:49, 21/10/2009

PLS

I'm butting my nose in where it doesn't belong, but that's just one of my irritating charming qualities. This is in regard to your feeling that there were less than three qualified candidates in a PLS category. I have seen competitions where they left a place blank. In fact, in some of the more serious writing/art/craft competitions in the SCA (Society for Creative Anachronism), I've seen them award a 2nd place in a category with no one awarded 1st place. I don't see why you couldn't have a 1st and 2nd place with no 3rd place. I realize that will be up to you and two other judges, so this is just a suggestion. King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  16:54, October 22, 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost 22nd 23rd October 2009

The Uncyclopedia UnSignpost

I love it when the news comes together

October 22nd, 2009 • Issue 68 • Semi-endorsed by Journalism Union #448

Invisible UnSignpost Issue Confuses, Annoys Readers By Gerrycheevers As a gag/publicity stunt/desperate cry for attention, last week's edition of Uncyclopedia's most beloved and 3rd most cherished newspaper, the UnSignpost, was rendered invisible before being delivered. After the issue was wrapped up, UnSignpost contributing editors Dexter111344 and Socky used their inherent superpowers or something to cause the issue to not appear on user's talk pages when delivered. In addition, further enhancements rendered each user's talk page history to not be altered upon delivery, thus completely erasing any evidence that the issue was delivered or even existed at any point. Feedback thus far has been overwhelmingly negative, with angry subscribers sending death threats and exploding telegrams to the UnSignpost office for the past four days. UnSignpost Executive in Charge of Sniffing Mail, Dognewspaper (pictured), luckily suffered only minor burns and a singed tail. The UnSignpost staff would like to formally apologize to its readers, and assure them that each subsequent issue will be at least partly visible. Poo Lit Report By Electrified mocha chinchilla After giving the writers time to work on their pieces, and Modus taking time enjoying the disqualification of entries for failing the mandatory steroids screening, the 8nd Edition of the Poo Lit Surprise is in its final stages – judging. This is the time where writers who entered play with their genitals out of anxiety and nervousness, and attempt to bribe the judges with sexual favors and pie. This PLS saw a great number of entries in the Best Alternate Namespace Article. The reasoning for this, some believe, is that everyone is utterly bat fuck insane and forgot how to write regular namespace articles. Despite being held just prior to the Turkey Day Ball and Conservation Week, the turn-out was overall not bad; Modus' corporate-funded campaign for the PLS is primarily to blame for this. Speaking of corporate funding, it was indicated that there will be prize money for this edition of the PLS despite Wikia's refusal to hook a brotha' up. All irrevocable blame for Wikia's unfortunate decision has been directed at Sannse for good reason. UPDATE Winners have been announced; congratulations to all of them. According to Modusoperandi, the next PLS is expected to be held, "When the next guy remembers it's late." Fantasy Football Update By Guildensternenstein Things are really heating up in the UFFL as midseason nears, and Week Six’s storylines were of upset, domination, and redemption. Led by Tom Brady, the always-solid New England Patriots Domestic Team Name blew out the hapless Tennessee Titans Winnerz by an insane 109.38 to 0 after choking down a hard loss the previous week. The ironically-named Winnerz, on the other hand, still have yet to win a game. After a lackluster showing last week, The John Curry All-Stars earned a solid win against The Dudes, unseating them of their erstwhile #1 ranking in the process. After starting the season 0-4, Cheddar’s Doritians earned their second consecutive win, albeit against the floundering Dibiase’s Millions. Finally, Sternensteinenstine resoundingly defeated Oklahoma City Storm 164.06 to 118.98 after a lackluster showing the previous week, catapulting the Nazi-run team back atop the UFFL standings. In a look ahead to next week’s games, Sternensteinenstine looks to stay atop the UFFL rankings against a resurgent Cheddar’s Doritians, Domestic Team Name looks to retake the #1 spot against a very solid John Curry All-Stars, Oklahoma City Storm and The Dudes face off, and the bottom-dwelling dog-fucking last-placers Dibiase’s Millions and The Winnerz will look to see which one of them is shittier. Standings: Sternensteinenstine (5-1) Domestic Team Name (5-1) The Dudes (4-2) John Curry All-Stars (4-2) Oklahoma City Storm (3-3) Cheddar’s Doritians (2-4) Dibiase’s Millions (1-5) The Winnerz (0-6) IT'S OVER 25,000!!! Maybe. By Electrified mocha chinchilla Uncyclopedia just might make the mark of 25,000 articles. Sometime soon. Maybe tomorrow. Surely it's yet another milestone that only puts us that much more ahead of Wikipedia, Conservapedia, and Das Kapital combined in content. However, thoughts from the rest of the community on what this means for our beloved wiki have been varyingly expressed as joyous, apathetic, dismal, and downright nonsensical. "But even with 25,000 articles, we're still 65,000 short of being strong enough to fight Captain Ginyu," says the attractive Guildensternenstein as we stop him on his way to Planet Namek. Others offer real conversation of a possible reskin and doubts that the mark will actually be reached with Forest Fire Week probably happening sometime. Maybe. Discussion started by an attention whore in Miniluv over the Welcoming Committee and their welcoming template(s) has sparked the particular attention of many Uncyclopedians, most of whom by their own admission have never read the welcoming template, HTBFANJS, BGBU, any of the other things the welcome template advises new users to read, or have heard of Uncyclopedia. The recent round of QQ'ing and debating over the alleged poor quality of Uncyclopedia, as highlighted in the last edition's piece about the end being nigh and a Poo Lit Surprise nomination, can come to a close. It is this writer's observation that Uncyclopedia is the worst because nobody cares about editing guides which make confusing acronyms. Obvious correlation is obvious. On our final stop in our stroll through the Village Dump, to your left you will see that a n00b was just kidding, jeez, and to your right you will see that Rockstar Games reads Uncyclopedia. In the former, users urge the poor fellow to read HTBFANJS and BGBU (the same ones that they probably haven't read). If anything is to be drawn from this, it is that true editing comes from within. Or something.

Check out these pages! Uncyclopedia:Worst or Not? The Debate Rages On Free Advertisement for Jumping Ship Spreading the Good Word About New Articles From our logs: 23:04, October 9, 2009 TheLedBalloon (Talk | contribs) blocked 24.90.32.102 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 day ‎(That was a waste of an edit. There are edit-starved kids in China that would've used that to its fullest extent, you know.) 10:48, October 13, 2009 RAHB (Talk | contribs) blocked Dwarfman1122 (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 2 weeks ‎(Thought you wouldn't be caught, eh? Maybe now you'll think twice the next time you vandalize and then wait three weeks to be banned.) 18:27, October 13, 2009 Mhaille (Talk | contribs) blocked 71.245.120.78 (Talk) with an expiry time of 3 months ‎(Please enjoy our token Fuck the Hell Off.....) 08:10, October 15, 2009 Under user (Talk | contribs) blocked Sudeepk9 (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 1 week (wow, we are a beacon of sunshine today, aren't we?) 21:27, October 17, 2009 Modusoperandi (Talk | contribs) blocked MrN9000 (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 1 day ‎(A wizard did this.) 17:36, October 19, 2009 Roman Dog Bird (Talk | contribs) changed block settings for 72.93.168.203 (Talk) with an expiry time of Judgement Day (Liking Naruto and insisting we stop making fun of it. What? How is that not a reason to permanently ban someone?) Biopic of the Week Sog1970 has churned out a dozen featured articles in just a few short months, earning him a Writer of the Month nod and now, the most esteemed honor on Uncyclopedia, an UnSignpost biopic. The lack of information on his user page makes writing said biopic rather difficult, but let it be known that Sog radiates awesome. Old School Featured Article of the Week Life's Answerable Questions are a series of ponderances and queriums that have most certainly not chafed at mankind the way other, more disgustingly unanswerable questions have. For example, asking "What's new?" to a stranger will certainly elicit a less confused response than one of those other questions. You know the ones we mean. CAJEKWATCH 05:42, October 15, 2009 RAHB (Talk | contribs) blocked Cajek (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 7 minutes ‎(Because I saw you existing.) 01:23, October 16, 2009 TheLedBalloon (Talk | contribs) blocked Cajek (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 2 minutes ‎(HOLY SHIT IT'S CAJEK HI CAJEK PS BANBANBAN LOLOLOL) 13:21, October 22, 2009 Under user (Talk | contribs) blocked Cajek (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 147 seconds ‎(I think I'm stressed, I need a release, and this is the best available on this wiki) Random Obscene Japanese Lesson "Kimi no te de boku o ikasete." means "Make me cum with your hand." "Kimi no oppai ga DEKAI yo! Ii nee." means "Your breasts are HUGE! Nice." "Omawarisan! Chikan o tsuka-mate!" means "Police! Arrest this pervert!" That should keep you little squirts happy... Reason to Leave Uncyc #387 Still no good restaurants. This Week in Uncyc, 1933 With the United States deep in a depression, the Uncyclopedia tri-weekly newsreel tried to lighten the mood by poking fun at American President Herbert Hoover and his bumbling sidekick of a Vice President, the famed Charles Curtis. Gags included, and were limited to, both individuals being hit repeatedly with rubber chickens. Mass Delusion of the Week Last week, many users claim to have had similar psychic visions of an alternate Main Page, which told them to do things in a calm, soothing voice. Such notions are of course nonsense; 7 out of the 10 members who sit on the Uncyclopedia Paranormal Activity Investigation and Acupuncture Licensing Board agree that a combination of swamp gas and Venus caused some users to hallucinate vividly, some nearly to the point of seizure. Record for Most Boxes Tied Due to the overwhelmingly large number of stories in this week's extremely humorous edition of the UnSignpost, a correspondingly overwhelmingly large number of space-wasting side boxes had to be added to cause the issue to weigh equally on both sides of reader's talk pages. As a result, the record for number of such boxes has been tied; this issue, along with the March 24th, 1983 edition, have had the most wasted space! Record Broken!!!

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9001(bot)  18:33, Oct 23

Poo Lit: The Oopsening

I crossed out User:SPIKE/FORTRAN, and shouldn't have. If you could read it and add it to your choices, I'd be much appreciative. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 04:20, October 24, 2009 (UTC)

pls, stuff, etc.

well hi there, stranger. just wanted to thank you for your obvious receipt of my bribe as per the PLS. you mention that i might have 'run out of time'; in fact, if you check the history, i started my entry on the very day the PLS closed, so i did indeed write the entire thing with no spare time to re-check for anything. as far as lobster goes, i don't care if it gets featured, either; i just like to read it every once in a while and get a chuckle myself. and concerning the future, i'll certainly take a look at your ideas list soon, as diverting your attention from boring admin duties is always fun for everyone! SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 00:58, October 25, 2009 (UTC)

I did that too. My entry was done in four hours. Congrats on yer win!    Orian57    Talk   12:21 26 October 2009

My article was done at the last moment as well. Imagine how much better this competition would have been if any of us actually prepared for it! Pup 02:03, 27/10/2009

Hey, no worries Gerry - you were a clear winner there. As I said, I just wish I hadn't volunteered to judge so hastily, so I could have (with the greatest respect to the other entrants) given you some proper competition! Hope you either see an idea you like, or come up with a suggestion of your own - the idea of working with you again is always an appealing one. --UU - natter 19:28, Oct 28

Yo I lost my stuff, so can I have my stuff pls? My internet was out

Yo sir. I need you to check if there are articles deleted from Category:Work In Progress my Internet was out I had to smoke some weed because it's the only way to deal with the withdrawl yo. Legalize the weed man and fight the power with love.

-User:TKDKidXism

I'm sorry, I don't speak stoned. Can someone translate into something resembling English please? --UU - natter 21:38, Oct 27

I think his WIPs were huffed and he wants them back. Also, your talk page is in Category:Working In Progress now. --Pleb SYNDROME _{CUN medicate (butt poop!!!!)} 00:03, October 28, 2009 (UTC)

Yeah, I was kind of waiting for him to tell me which pages. Still am, come to that. --UU - natter 09:03, Oct 28

There are no huffed pages that I can see in his contribs... Something that was reverted maybe? But then he could get the history himself. HEY, STONED KID! WHAT DO YOU WANT? Pup 10:50, 28/10/2009

Ah, but that's because contribs magically hide deleted pages from you plebs - we swanky admins can see them. But I'm not going to look through his deleted contribs to see what he may want back - if he's too lazy/stoned to tell me what he wants back, I'm too lazy to find out for him. --UU - natter 10:54, Oct 28

Oh... That's actually really annoying. I like to snoop into what people are doing, and I like having access to insignificant information that will make minimal difference in my life. Did you know that household dust is made up predominantly of human tissue and meteorite dust? Pup 11:01, 28/10/2009

Quite litterally the worst kept secret ever.    Orian57    Talk   15:15 29 October 2009

Wanna drive by?

I think I'd need some comment on this piece I'm working on. I don't want a full pee, otherwise I'd have submitted it there. It's too short at the moment. Ideas on what to expand on, what to tone down..? -- DameViktoria - (Contribs) - (Talk) - (Block log) 16:09, 28 Oct

I like the idea, so that's a good start. There is plenty of potential for expansion. For inspiration for a start, I'm thinking of the bit in Restaurant at the End of the Universe where Arthur Dent tries to explain tea to the computer. So think bone china, and putting the milk in first so as not to scald the tea; discuss proper sourcing of your tea (American "English Breakfast"? pshaw); remember the importance of warming the teapot first; think "more tea vicar"; explore the appropriate accompaniment: a genteel biscuit or (in exceptional circumstances) a scone; expand that guest list section - the vicar is an absolute must, a little old lady who may solve a difficult murder is a good idea, a titled individual is strongly recommended etc; don't forget that the mouth must be dabbed fastidiously with a cloth napkin in between sips... Hope that's enough to go on for now, I suspect I could come up with more if asked. The only thing I insist on is that you finish this, because I really want to see it done! Now, you've made me thirsty... --UU - natter 16:30, Oct 28

Actually... the milk in first is a lower-class invention. The milk is poured in last, gently mixed with a spoon which is then wiped on the edge of the china, not licked, and after that, placed on the matching tea saucer in stead of leaving it into the cup as working class barbarians do. After that, contrary to a popular misconception, one should drink it with the little finger folded neatly alongside the rest of the fingers, not sticking out as they'd like to make you think... :)

I have survived a whole lot of proper etiquette lessons. Benefit/curse of being born to a baronial family IRL... -- DameViktoria - (Contribs) - (Talk) - (Block log) 17:22, 28 Oct

Yeah, but the milk in first thing is a good stereotype to at least mention - and as I said, I was thinking of Arthur's explanation in RatEotU, wherein milk in first is clearly mentioned. Besides, I have also had etiquette lessons - my mum told me never to put my elbows on the table. --UU - natter 19:25, Oct 28

Grrrr.. Grumble Grumble British Grumble • FreddThe Redd • • • 19:43, October 28, 2009 (UTC)

Milk doesn't go in first. Unless you want to come off as a labour voter and I can't have that. Now, chop chop, off to play with a chainsaw, laddies... -- DameViktoria - (Contribs) - (Talk) - (Block log) 21:08, 28 Oct

...speaking of driving by...

Would you mind either giving this brain fart a formal look, or bullying one of your skilled protégés to giving it a peek? -- DameViktoria - (Contribs) - (Talk) - (Block log) 21:19, 29 Oct

If we could refrain from issuing threats

The reason I saw fit to remove the ICU tag from the Daniel Plainview v. Leonidas article was because I had corrected its problem, a simple matter of formatting. The article itself is highly amusing as you'll observe by reading it. Kindly refrain from threatening me with banning in future as I am a rising star on Uncyclopedia and many respected users will rally to my defence. --Ozymandiaz 18:25, October 28, 2009 (UTC)

Listen pal, don't get shirty - I see people remove ICU tags on a regular basis, and threats are normally the only thing that stops it happening. Besides, that wasn't a particularly threatening threat, more a statement of fact. Now, read this very carefully: the message on the ICU tag was "Fix everything. This is crap.", which was more than a tad brutal, but is also a bit different to "just fix the formatting". So you didn't "fix the issue". Nextly, removing the ICU tag is a bannable offence - some admins ban at the first sight of it, rather than warn - I was being nice to you. Finally, you may notice the comments I made on the ICU I put on the article - because I did read it. Now, rising star you may be, but I've been around this wiki for a few years now, and I'm simply offering you an experienced opinion - in that format, it's likely to get deleted, so think about making it an UnScript, and adding pictures and so forth. When you think it's done, come back, and if I agree, the ICU tag comes off. That's how it works, OK, rising star? --UU - natter 19:13, Oct 28

While you're at it, ask him if I can get his autograph. He is, after all, a rising star. ~ 20:03, October 28, 2009 (UTC)

Is he? Damn, I knew I should have mentioned that. --UU - natter 09:52, Oct 29

Also, a lot of users will rally to his defense. Guys? GUYS?! Where are you all? ~ 12:22, October 29, 2009 (UTC)

what? • FreddThe Redd • • • 13:18, October 29, 2009 (UTC)

I would rally to his defence but I have no idea who he is.... also I have no horse. --ChiefjusticeDS 14:21, October 29, 2009 (UTC)

I have this old M1A1 from the army surplus.. But I don't have enough diesel.. Sorry, mate.. • FreddThe Redd • • • 14:44, October 29, 2009 (UTC)

Very well, I will take your message on board. You'll have to forgive me for appearing belligerent, ordinarily I'm very good natured. Also I'd be happy to give you my autorgraph but I must warn you I usually charge. --Ozymandiaz 15:49, October 29, 2009 (UTC)

There we go - your star just rose with me! Good luck with it. --UU - natter 08:55, Oct 30

Thank you so much, where do I sign? --Ozymandiaz 14:46, October 31, 2009 (UTC)

MGMT

Hey, you recently huffed MGMT per expired WIP tag. Could you put that article on my Userspace? Thanks.--You know what the music means... Our time is up. 18:56, October 28, 2009 (UTC)

But of course, I'll get on it right now. Why can't they all be that polite? --UU - natter 19:14, Oct 28

There y'go. Incidentally, be careful with your caps - you wanted Mgmt, which is totally different to MGMT - which was a crappy stub I also deleted, but back in the summmer. You almost got that to work on instead - until I spotted the problem. --UU - natter 19:23, Oct 28

Correct.

you are correct sir. this message is in reference to the message you left on my discuss page. – Preceding unsigned comment added by Tamatamamayo (talk • contribs)

In which case, protip: respond to comments where they are left - if people care at all about the answer, they'll watchlist the page, and see when you reply. And I find that it is always easy to be correct when stating the obvious, but thanks for noticing! --UU - natter 14:23, Oct 29

I want a copy of my deleted article: MEC

Sorry I forgot to move on User:DaDopeboy/blahblah yesterday. Another article GLA has already moved.
Anyways, can you submit the copy of the article? I appreciate it. --Dah Dope Boyz' 12:29, October 30, 2009 (UTC)

OK, there you go. I suggest leaving it in userspace until you finish it, so this doesn't happen again. Good luck! --UU - natter 12:38, Oct 30

Thanks for doing all of these works. Thats why I love admins of Uncyclopedia. --Dah Dope Boyz' 12:39, October 30, 2009 (UTC)

Thanks

Chief would like thank you for voting for him to be UotM for October Thanks! It means a lot to me, which is quite depressing on it's own.

Since I'm here, thank you very much for dealing with the several drama situations I have managed to get myself into without banning me and for ensuring PEE is always in order (sorting the list archiving, blew my mind this morning). I would give you some cake but Mordillo ate it first, but just think of the calories! --ChiefjusticeDS 19:12, November 1, 2009 (UTC)

There you go blaming me again. *grumble grumble* ~ 19:15, November 1, 2009 (UTC)

Geezus, Cheif, you barely even changed the dialogue...    Orian57    Talk   23:44 1 November 2009

Hey, it was early, and why fix what isn't broken? I figured that changing the colours was cheap enough. I mean it's not like I didn't consider changing the dialogue, I even composed a poem to go in as well. But then I accidentally went back from the page and I was using IE so I lost it and then I couldn't remember what the second line was, something about rain and a window pane (it was raining this morning, that's where I got the idea) so I though ah well, and then I thought that nobody would care since nobody ever cares around here. --ChiefjusticeDS 23:48, November 1, 2009 (UTC)

Oh I don't care, I stole my "thanksplate" code from Yettie. It just looks really lazy to anyone who remembers my WotM thanksplate.    Orian57    Talk   23:51 1 November 2009

I don't care about that anyway, as you may have noticed I am quite lazy when it comes to signatures and templates. Also, who wrote the code in the first place, since you stole it, then I stole it from you. Did Yettie steal it from someone else? Is this how the universe really started? Did God just steal someone else's code? --ChiefjusticeDS 23:54, November 1, 2009 (UTC)

You didn't even correct the rogue apostrophe in the final "its", Chief - obviously Orian's handiwork! ;-) --UU - natter 11:06, Nov 2

I see it as a trademark for Orian, I wouldn't dream of ripping off his work without leaving appropriate proof of ownership. --ChiefjusticeDS 11:59, November 2, 2009 (UTC)

Look, I probably suffer mild dislexia you people are bullies! I really am horrible with grammar though, it really bugs me when I re-read my own stuff. So I'm sorry.    Orian57    Talk   12:36 2 November 2009

You should take it as a compliment, you write way better than I do, so I comfort myself by picking out all the mistakes that I can find in your work. Even when I'm just reading through I correct them, so you should be happy that we are on your case. --ChiefjusticeDS 12:57, November 2, 2009 (UTC)

Whereas from me you should take it as the insult it is clearly intended to be. --UU - natter 14:16, Nov 2

Year3000

I took a trip to the year 3 thousand/ This song had gone multi platinum/ Everybody bought our 7th album/ It had outsold Michael Jackson.

Oh Busted. They were awesome. Horrible as astrology, but awesome. I'm just here so my taste in music, Chutzpah aside, can disappoint you.    Orian57    Talk   00:45 2 November 2009

Busted were, indeed, one of the worst things to ever happen to music. But beyond that, my music taste is somewhat eclectic, so I'm rarely in a position to complain about the taste of others. I'm officially too old to care about "cred" any more, which means I can say I don't mind Paramore, for example (although that new track isn't growing on me yet - bit dull). I listen to all sorts of crap - my MP3 player has nearly 6000 songs on, and probably only 20% of those have any credibility. Who gives a toss? Music, like comedy, is entirely subjective: the only thing that is definitely wrong is liking Oasis - they suck, and that's an end to it. --UU - natter 11:13, Nov 2

Oh I agree completely (except I really like Paramore's new album, not sure which one they used for their single but if it's Ignorance it's my favourite), I 'm just pretty sure you said something completely different sometime. My MP3 is half full with lots of different shit, everything from Lazytown to stuff SysRq made to NoFX and slipknot. Also what's up in the wider world of UU? with me They're talking about finding me underpaid work, you know, for the experience. I'm actually vaguely looking forward to it.    Orian57    Talk   12:33 2 November 2009

Haven't heard the album, just the single a couple of times on Kerrang TV. Dunno what I would have said differently before - I listen to far too much stuff. This morning has been a journey through Billy Joel, Joni Mitchell, Hall & Oates, Skid Row, Jimmy Eat World, Ministry and Dean Martin courtesy of my random play function. Life at the moment for me is hectic. I'd recommend you never try having a pregnant wife, a terminally ill father-in-law, and an impending house more all at the same time, except at least one of those things is highly unlikely to happen to you. Seriously, if I get seconds to call my own at the moment, it's a luxury. Any particular kind of underpaid work, or just whatever comes along? --UU - natter 13:25, Nov 2

It's a placement so they find somewhere willing to take me on for thirteen weeks and I get put there. Probably a charity shop or somewhere. I'll get slightly more money than I do now, so it's not a total loss. Like I said, kinda looking forward to getting a taste of that thing people call "life". Although I will have to start showering everyday and that'll fuck up the environment.    Orian57    Talk   14:27 2 November 2009

That was a joke to clarify. I probably won't bother.    Orian57    Talk   10:29 3 November 2009

I figured as much. On both counts. Actually, our new house actually has a shower, which is a novelty! So I will be able to shower every day, should I want to. Probably won't, mind, but it will be nice to have the option there anyway. --UU - natter 10:36, Nov 3

Yeah when I say shower I do mean bath because the shower we have is horribly tempermental and absolutely everyone in the house forgets that useing the taps downstairs fucks up the tempriture with the shower. My scars have heales now. Anyway, jobcentre time! located twenty miles away for no good reason.    Orian57    Talk   10:39 3 November 2009

May I please kill my mother-in-law?

That woman is more work than I can handle. Prime sample of the stout English matrons who disapprove of someone not quite of their son's standing snatching him and "eloping" with him (he has a job in the EU, I have been blessed with housewifedom, and we moved after his job). I am regularly reminded by her of my unsuitability for his son, and completely ignored when I try to enforce some rules on the child. Pacifier wars indeed... The witch will be shipped back off to the airport tomorrow, so in celebration, would you, as the sensible chap you are, have any ideas to what I could attempt to write about to relax? -- Little Pink Sock 10:16, November 2, 2009 (UTC)

Hey, nice to see you, LPS! You're in luck - we have the perfect opportunity right now - conservation week! We positively encourage people to sift through Category:Rewrite, or even just trust to pot luck, and find a hopeless page that they feel they can do something with. It can help to give you an idea to start from, and would definitely be most appreciated by all around here. Just be sure to mention which articles you're working on on the conservation week page, to make sure you don't clash with anyone else.

As to the mother-in-law, I sympathise - all mothers-in-law suck, with the sole exception on my wife's mother-in-law, who I think is entirely reasonable! ;-) --UU - natter 11:03, Nov 2

Oh my, there are a lot of articles. Most of them seem to be outside my comfort zone by virtue of subject matter, though. I may have to give this rewriting project some more time and thought. -- Little Pink Sock 13:45, November 2, 2009 (UTC)

Yes there are, but the great thing about rewriting is you can use as much or as little of the original article as possible. Sometimes all it takes is a title to spark you, sometimes you read an article and think "this is crap, but I can see how to make it betterer". A lot of my first articles were rewrites, I just found it helped to have some base clay to shape, y'know? If it's not for you, there's always the requested articles page, which is full of nothing but redlinks to articles people think would be good ideas, but they don't want to write themselves - there's usually a good idea or two hiding on there. --UU - natter 14:10, Nov 2

I think I found a couple. I added them to that constipation list, so I may remember them. First, baby meal time. Last time, I found carrot purée behind my ear an hour after lunch. I wonder what surprises lie in wait today. Do you perchance have children? The little ones are cute, but my god are they messy. -- Little Pink Sock 14:23, November 2, 2009 (UTC)

Not yet - I have all that joy ahead of me. In about three and a half months or so. One thing I'm already noticing is the attitude of people who are already parents. Before you have any it's all "oh you are so missing out - seriously, it's the best thing ever, wouldn't change it for the world, it's just sooo rewarding; I wouldn't be without my kids for the world". Then they hear there's one on the way and it's "you'll never sleep again - man, you are going to suffer! Kiss your personal life goodbye, and don't even think about buying anything for yourself until they're about 40!" I think the phrase is "misery loves company". And good luck with the rewrites - those sound like two good ideas to work on. --UU - natter 14:29, Nov 2

Children are a blessing and a curse. I never truly lie about that. People should realise it takes more than the ability to have sex to be a parent. The teenager pregnancy statistics in the UK speak for themselves. A child can't choose its parents, which is why I would rather see dedicated, responsible adults, such as you seem to be, becoming parents than having yet another chav get knocked up because she passed out at the neighbour's party. A professor of mine once emphasised that the epitome of irrational behaviour (we were discussing something such as buying behaviour from a psychological point of view) is to have a baby. It is economically all but sound behaviour, and you expose yourself to bodily excretions, crying, puberty and have to commit to it for a minimum of 18 years. God bless that good old professor...

I actually have a question. I noticed the name of one of the rewritable articles was copied to a user's user space with the sub-page thing. Is that the usual way to go with rewrites? Or..? -- Little Pink Sock 14:57, November 2, 2009 (UTC)

That is entirely up to you - it depends how long you think you might take, and if you want to ensure you're not interrupted during your rewrite - if you do the rewrite in the mainspace, you may well get IP edits, vandal edits or anything interrupting your flow. Particularly if you start your rewrite by clearing out the crap and then taking a day or two to add the rest of the content - people will see that as a blank canvas for vandalism. But in your userspace, you can take your time safe in the knowledge that it shouldn't be touched by anyone except yourself, and then copy it back when you're done. Again, I did most of my rewrites in userspace when I got started, but I'm doing Jose Mourinho straight in mainspace this time purely because I couldn't be bothered with the extra 30 seconds' work that copying and pasting it to my userspace would represent! (Plus if anyone vandalises it while I'm working on it, I can just ban their worthless ass...) --UU - natter 15:14, Nov 2

I don't know which way will be better before I try it, I guess. You're always so helpful. I would offer you some tea, but I think we are about a two hour's flight apart, and I don't really know you, so I will offer a proverbial cookie of thanks. Did I miss you being an admin, by the way? At least I didn't realise it before. I'll keep being a good girl, no fear. -- Little Pink Sock 15:53, November 2, 2009 (UTC) Oh, could you give a five to ten word comment on what is or isn't okay with this article here at the moment. There is one of those hmtl comments in there marking the line above which the text is rewritten. I think I'm taking the article the right way... But am not sure. -- Little Pink Sock 09:39, November 3, 2009 (UTC)

If you just want an at-a-glance opinion, then I'd say you are on the right lines - carry on in that direction, and don't forget some pictures. Oh, and kill that list. But yeah, looking better so far, LPS, keep it up! --UU - natter 10:33, Nov 3

What list? The one with wiseasses? That's what I "salvaged" for now, since some of those names can still be entered into the article's bulk text. I think. I somehow don't understand why no-one's bothered giving it a try before. The article was certified poopey (the baby's in my lap and there's this thing about mothers against swearing and all...) -- Little Pink Sock 10:44, November 3, 2009 (UTC)

Oh I'm not saying kill it now - it's kinda shorthand for "find a way to better integrate the list into the prose, rather than just leaving it as a list - I'm sure you're going to do this anyway, but I thought I'd mention it". As to why nobody's tried before - people often don't think to do a good rewrite, which is why we need things like Conservation Week (and even PLS which you just missed) to encourage people to spruce up what we already have. --UU - natter 11:09, Nov 3

PLS? Another theme week? You've got more of them than I can keep track of. And I still don't get all the voting processes you've got. So I do my best at not trampling any toes. Now, I've got a few moments off, the baby's asleep, and the witch is on her way to the airport with the hubby. Hooray. -- Little Pink Sock 12:12, November 3, 2009 (UTC)

We only really have PLS, CW and the Turkey Day Ball. But for some reason, they all seem to follow one another in very short order! Anyway, PLS is over for another 6 months, so CW is where it's at. Enjoy your precious moments of liberty! --UU - natter 12:37, Nov 3

Attending Urologist

I know it's a new month, but Doesn't Why? deserve this? He was nommed for RotM last month and is again this month. And he's peed 24 times! DAP Dame Pleb Com. Miley Spears (talk) 22:11, November 2, 2009 (UTC)

I happened to be passing and thought I would leave my opinion, because I know you are all so interested.

Why? is an excellent reviewer, and as such is almost certainly going to be RotM for November, a promotion to AU would be a bit pointless as it grants nothing new except the ability to call yourself an Attending, which is cool if you are American I guess. But since RotM carries the rank of Steel Kidney anyway it would just mean cutting and pasting his name twice instead of once. I already bombarded his talk page with thanks and templates for last month anyway. But since UU is the King of PEE I will let him get back to you. I'm going now. --ChiefjusticeDS 23:16, November 2, 2009 (UTC)

I think he'll get it too. But that's a month from now and right now I think he deserves to be named an AU. Plus he can help check Pee Reviews this month to see if they're in depth, right? But I know it's Under user's decision. DAP Dame Pleb Com. Miley Spears (talk) 23:24, November 2, 2009 (UTC)

Seriously don't get him to do that, that list is inhuman, I spent hours searching for a missing review Why had done because the list said 23 and his user page said 24, I had to count them all up, and he had indeed done 24 so then I had to go through the final scores and compare them to find the one that was missing, then I had to do the averages again. It was horrible. --ChiefjusticeDS 23:28, November 2, 2009 (UTC)

That list is a blighter, I hate doing it and I've never had any missing reviews or numbers. I think we need a way of making it easier to edit. In fact I brought that up with UU before, about getting rid of the "average score" column, because it serve no real purpose.    Orian57    Talk   09:17 3 November 2009

I'll be honest with you, the way PEEING works, I don't really see the need for the AU thing. Not at the moment. For me, it's something to use if we have a glut of good reviewers going all at once, and none of them have RotM yet, but they need recognising. As it is, most months there's one outstanding candidate who'll end up being RotM and hence SK at the end of the month, so there's no point in giving extra recognition a week or two early. That's how I see it anyway. As to the list, after Saber had been doing it for a while, I had to correct a bunch of averages because he kept missing them. Took me aaaages. But I still find them useful. So ner. If they stop other people checking, well, I can still do it (it's good to have a break though, oh yeah). But that's beside the point. (I'm sure there would be a way to make it much easier to maintain using wiki-fu, but that would probably involve asking Spang, and he's not so keen on PEEING, so I never bothered to ask him). Anyway, Why? will get his just reward this month, and the list will continue to tick over. It is the sound of inevitability. Or something. --UU - natter 10:51, Nov 3

I don't mind doing the averages, so I'm quite happy to carry on checking everything for now. UU has important admin business and a real life to attend to, so I will carry on checking, just as long as UU turns up now and then to make sure my self-checking isn't lacking. --ChiefjusticeDS 11:03, November 3, 2009 (UTC)

You mean to tell me you do the averages manually and don't use wiki-fu to make life easier? Show me the process you follow with this shite and I'm happy to use my wiki-fu to help out. Sub-comment: can you claim CW credit for rewrite of templates? Pup

See here. And then the three main tables, here, here, and here. They're the fun bits. And if you think you can make them sing and dance (or just be easier to update), good luck to you! (And no, you can't claim 'em for CW - how does gratitude and possibly cake sound?) --UU - natter 12:31, Nov 3

Okay. It's on my list of things to do. They'll be done when I do them. Pup

Why do people like talking about me and then stop when I enter the room? As to "Attending Urologist," the part I'd really like is that I can help out more. I'd like to start learning how to do that reviewing the Pee Reviews and keeping the records straight stuff. If UU thinks I qualify (and I understand UU is the Great Exalted Poobah of Pee), would it be too much trouble to simply add my name under Attending Urologist so I could start learning now how to help and stuff and do it official like instead of waiting for the Hanukkah rush? My Mamma really wants me to be a doctor. King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  04:43, November 9, 2009 (UTC)

Honestly, I really wouldn't sweat it, mate - you'll be a SK in 3 weeks anyway. If you want to help with the list, all cool and groovy, why don't you start keeping an eye on how Chief is doing it (or me, if I get time), and asking about anything you don't get? Meanwhile, use the next 3 weeks to do a few more reviews, really get that experience up, because it helps if you're checking borderline cases - sometimes, you can see if the few lines is likely to be enough help or not. Sound good? --UU - natter 12:09, Nov 9

OK I lied. I don't care about helping out, I just want the title. Seriously, I'll start checking it out, as right now I honestly don't know what a borderline case is. And I imagine if I ever run into one I'm not sure about, I can ask you or Chiefster for a second opinion. Thanks! King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  21:55, November 9, 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost 29-10-2009

The Uncyclopedia UnSignpost

Woop Woop! it's the sound of the Police UnSignpost!

October 29th, 2009 • Issue 69 • Hehehe, 69

9001(bot)  01:56, Nov 3

Attn: Regarding an article hosted on your website

Dear Mr/Ms Under user/Archive 24, Greetings. I am the lawyer for Arthur C. Clarke's estate. It has come to my assistant's attention that you recently supported an article on this website (henceforth referred to as "Uncyclopedia"), namely the article titled 2001: A Space Odyssey, to be featured on the website front page. We are honoured, although, of course: 1. We are fully aware of just how monumentally great the film is, and 2. We are preparing a suit against you for supporting copyright infringement, and the author of the article (referred to as "MacMania") is currently under arrest at Sri Lanka (not Ceylon).* However, we would be obliged if you would be able to do us one small favour. As interim representatives of Clarke's estate, we are in talks with Random House to commission a fifth book to add to the 2001 trilogy of four books. We've always been of the opinion that 3001: The Final Odyssey was too bleak of a book, and we would love to have the series finish on a slightly more upbeat note. We were thinking 3010: And Another Odyssey, by J K Rowling? Please let us know. Your obedient servant (in a figurative sense) James Steel c/o Alesha Phillips London EC4M 7EH UK * Why Ceylon got the works is nobody's business but the Sinhalese.

It's a bit late, but not as late as a late parrot. Thanks! Sir MacMania GUN—[14:04 3 Nov 2009]

THAT'S IT! I HAVE HAD WITH THESE MOTHERF**KING ARTIVLES GETTING DELETED ON THIS MOTHERF**KING SITE!

I had 3 articles called "Zombieland", "The Nightmare Before Christmas", & "Where the Wild Things Are". Apparently, since I didn't log on, as I had better things to do on Wikipedia, you decided to be funny and delete them. However, no one is laughing & I could really use them both back but I have already started to re-write "Where the Wild Things Are." Thanks for your time & have a wonderful day! – Preceding unsigned comment added by Pythonofdoom (talk • contribs)

Um, 3 articles? Both back? You could use a remedial grammar lesson as well ;-) And for the record, I didn't "decide to be funny and delete them", they had tags on that expire if they're not edited for a week. Those tags expired. Most articles with those expired tags on them are never touched again, so it's a fair assumption that deletion will not be an issue. I do, however, leave the message to have a word if you want them back, which is more than you might get elsewhere. However, I'm a little confused - are you saying you want them back? Just say a simple "can you restore my deleted articles please, and I'll stick 'em in your userspace. But for now, as I'm confused, I'm doing nothing. OK? --UU - natter 19:00, Nov 3

Geeze, you're from wikipedia. And you've never heard of quality control?    Orian57    Talk   19:34 3 November 2009

Have you looked at Wikipedia recently. They constantly go down the path of least resistance, so if something is controversial, it gets edited out. It's a search for the least inconvenient truth. Pup

can you restore my deleted articles please – Preceding unsigned comment added by Pythonofdoom (talk • contribs)

I noticed

(shouldn't really remove this as I'm still busy as fuck, but no-one seems to notice anyway) I noticed. :) DAP Dame Pleb Com. Miley Spears (talk) 01:21, November 4, 2009 (UTC)

WHAT!? What did you notice! You can't leave us hanging like that! What did you notice?    Orian57    Talk   12:58 4 November 2009

That I had the vacation template on my userpage. And I'll probably have to put it back due to being insanely busy. --UU - natter 09:15, Nov 5

I'm stuck

...and I can't get the article about wisdom worked on. Jr's got an ear infection, and I'm spent. Can I cry now? Any ideas on how to get help if you're stuck typing something? Maybe one of your minions you were trying to donate to me earlier could be of some use? I could use some pictures/jokes/babysitters. The wiki that shall not be named mentions the goddess of wisdom Sophia, so I thought about asking for pictures of something like that, maybe cranking out a joke or two about that, but it might go over the heads of users here. But my ideas have been buried under hurting ears and a genuine distaste for "strawberry" tasting penicillin from Jr. I could swear more of it is now on my shirt than inside the kid. -- Little Pink Sock 16:19, November 4, 2009 (UTC)

It sucks being a parent at times. UU hasn't gotten there yet, so we will try not to scare him too much, but I know how you feel.

Firstly, I never worry if my humour is too high-brow or too low brow. The first rule of thumb for me is What would Jesus laugh at? Do I find this funny? If it tickles my funny bone, then it will be likely to tickle somebody elses.

Secondly, Sophia is never the wrong answer.

Thirdly, there is no time frame or limitation that you have to work to here. You're not being paid for your contributions. Admittedly, I want you to give me more and give it to me soon, as I love reading your work, but don't stress

Fourthly, there is a {{stuck}} but it doesn't get checked as regularly as it should. If you don't mind waiting then somebody else will pick it up. (I used it once and then got sick of waiting and got myself unstuck.

Fifthly, I'm about to re-write Love, which has a similar issue behind it. I'm going to try and identify and define what is common knowledge while also being near impossible to quantify, and having too much material to work with. My approach will be to go through the Wikipedia article and parody each section as I go along, which is what worked for me with Six Hats, Lateral Thinking, and a few others. I'll probably end up going a little further afield as well.

Pup

What Puppy said sounds like a good start, I'd give a longer answer but I'm insanely busy right now. --UU - natter 09:15, Nov 5

Hey wait a minute!

Based on this little nugget of information someone so conveniently tries to hide, I was not exactly in the wrong for removing that piece of piled up insults thinly disguised as a review. You really, really, really should hold a few repetition courses in how to deliver softened blows to people around here. I'm still not here and I hate most of you 00:04, November 5, 2009 (UTC)

Yeah information that is now irelevant. Just ask for another one. I'm pretty sure it was UU who told me to do that, and not revert, when I got a really nasty review. Although I shouldn't butt in here because I'm not UU or Mordillo, and I'm in the majority.    Orian57    Talk   00:09 5 November 2009

Reverting a review you don't feel is helpful has happened before. I didn't have a problem with that part of what happened. And as I promised, I will get to the review, when I'm not so insanely busy. --UU - natter 09:15, Nov 5

Thank you sweetness, before the end of the month will do for me. I'm still a bit bitter over one of my reviews not being classified as in-depth, but I think it's just my vanity and ego talking. Now, be a good boy and give Mrs UU a cuddle and breakfast in bed before you check any other pages on uncyc... ;) on opiates for the pain again 08:04, November 6, 2009 (UTC)

Hey Mr. User

Would you by any chance be in a photoshopping-y mood around now? If so, would you mind checking this thing out for me? If not that's cool, but I'd really like to get another relevant image or two onto this thing. - T.L.B. WotM, UotM, FPrize, AotM, ANotM, PLS, UN:HS, GUN 04:18, Nov 5

Sorry Led, I'm insanely busy right now. If you still need 'em when the insanity stops, I'm your man though. --UU - natter 09:15, Nov 5

No problem, I'll try to find another photoshopper. - T.L.B. WotM, UotM, FPrize, AotM, ANotM, PLS, UN:HS, GUN 23:08, Nov 5

So You're insanely busy, right?

Care to tell us just how insane this insanity is? Is it a regular sort of insanity when your being told to do a few more things than normal and you were caught off guard or is it the fun sort of insanity where all of society is crumbling around you and people are butchering each other in the streets and only you can turn the tide of reason. You're not becoming part of InsanePedia are you?    Orian57    Talk   11:51 5 November 2009

It's the kind of insane you get when your manager has enough work for 6 people for the next 8 weeks, and there are only 3 of you on the team, and it's all got to be done in 7 weeks. It would seem, though, that I have the occasional moment when everything I have to do is waiting on other people to send me files, and I can't do anything until they arrive, which this time gives me enough time to delete stuff, answer this frivolous question, and ban some people. Actually, I haven't banned anyone yet, better sort that out right now. --UU - natter 13:36, Nov 5

Hurrah! 5 more bans and I have a funny number of bans -- I can't wait.    Orian57    Talk   13:58 5 November 2009

Thanks

 Voting For Godot  

The GlobalTourniquet says "Thanks!"   Thanks, <insert name here>, for ruining the pathos of my plight by voting for my featured article.

Verdana's my favourite

13:44 (Huff log) . . Under user (Talk | contribs) huffed "Tahoma" (content was: 'DAMN IT MORDILLO! WHY YOU HATE TAHOMA!? YOU ARIAL LOVERRRRRRRRRRR! Grrrrrrrrr! BEAR CLAW! BASTARDDDDDDDDDD! P.s. I Love Tahoma =]' (and the only contributor was '194.83.25.91')) My goddess I laughed when I saw that. Next time that IP will come after you, dearie... (oh, and thanks for the pee) -- DameViktoria - (Contribs) - (Talk) - (Block log) 11:49, 9 Nov

Yeah, well... Mordillo has deleted that article 3 times, that was only my first. Mind you, for all the deleting and banning I do around here, I don't get half the hate edits Mordillo, RDB or MrN get. I must be doing it wrong somehow. ;-) And you're welcome, hope it's helpful. --UU - natter 12:01, Nov 9

Don't know about helpful mid-exam season, but it helped me since it gives a fresh reflection of what's going on there right now. If you feel left out, I can vandalise something with hateful messages against you... Maybe it'll make you feel better? ;) -- DameViktoria - (Contribs) - (Talk) - (Block log) 12:19, 9 Nov

UU LOVES BOYS!!! teh he he he!!!    Orian57    Talk   12:30 9 November 2009

Just boys? I love men! Plenty of men! But not all at the same time! :D -- DameViktoria - (Contribs) - (Talk) - (Block log) 12:37, 9 Nov

Fine....UU LOVES BOYS THAT ARE OVER 18 YEARS OLD AND HAVE HAIRS ON THEIR CHEST ACCORDING TO LUVVY! for teh lulz!    Orian57    Talk   12:42 9 November 2009

Luvvy loves men. Especially the huggable ones. -- DameViktoria - (Contribs) - (Talk) - (Block log) 12:48, 9 Nov

Luvvy gave me a hug and I'm a better man because of it. King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  21:57, November 9, 2009 (UTC)

I think you'll find that's not so much hate vandalism as wishful thinking on your part, Orian. Quite a lot of it, actually. --UU - natter 13:35, Nov 9

Okay, so maybe. If I'm tied to the bed and they're tag-teaming. But that might just be the morphine talkin'... :o -- DameViktoria - (Contribs) - (Talk) - (Block log) 13:41, 9 Nov

Oh you want hate do you? I can do that, you just watch me: UU SMELLS OF LUBE AND CHEAP BUTTER BECAUSE HE RAN OUT OF LUBE BECAUSE HE WAS WANKING TOO MUCH AND THEN WENT TO HELL FOR WANKING TOO MUCH AND THE BUTTER CAUGHT FIRE AND THE DEVIL WAS ALL LIKE BUMMING HIM BECAUSE THE DEVIL IS GAY LIKE UU /me does that 'west side' thing with my hand/ beat that then old man.    Orian57    Talk   14:57 9 November 2009

Damn, I've already chosen my inspirational quote for the day. Pup

If that's the best you can do for hate, Ned Flanders has a brand new role model. --UU - natter 22:30, Nov 9

Well at least I've never fucked a flamingo. You big bird molester. Big bald bird molester.    Orian57    Talk   22:43 9 November 2009

I get worse than that from the little old lady who lives down the road. --UU - natter 22:55, Nov 9

Well, seen as how you're the master, what would you insult yourself with?    Orian57    Talk   23:24 9 November 2009

'Master'? What have you gotten yourself into, orian? • FreddThe Redd • • • 13:38, November 10, 2009 (UTC)

I wish.    Orian57    Talk   15:55 10 November 2009

If you want a classic insult, you can't beat "Your mother was a hamster and your father smelled of elderberries." (MPatHG). King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  21:12, November 10, 2009 (UTC)

That doesn't work because UU was raised by two men. Yeah! You're dads are gay! He'll never recover from that verbal blow.    Orian57    Talk   23:53 10 November 2009

CAPE!!!!

I'm not sure if I know you well enough to sexually molest you yet but it seems to be the common gesture of affection on Uncyc. Have a nice day. --Ozymandiaz 13:33, November 10, 2009 (UTC)

Actually, it's only really used when people have just archived their talk pages - the "joke" being you're molesting the now-pristine page. I never found it all that funny, myself (I really dislike that word, and all it entails), so I have an unwritten, unofficial rule that people should be more inventive on my talk page. But because it is unwritten and unofficial, you weren't to know that, so I'll just change the word, and accept it in the spirit you intended it: thanks - you too! --UU - natter 13:38, Nov 10

Oh, right. Sorry. --Ozymandiaz 18:03, November 10, 2009 (UTC)

GAH! indent properly!    Orian57    Talk   18:05 10 November 2009

I'm more a fan of Despoil myself. Pup

Well, it's written now. --Pleb SYNDROME _{CUN medicate (butt poop!!!!)} 01:15, November 11, 2009 (UTC)

Cheese!

Being british I assume you're a fan of Wallace and Gromit. Well, just to spread the word they've got games on the xbox arcade, I downloaded the first and it's definitly chucklesome, I'd recomend it. That is all.    Orian57    Talk   15:58 10 November 2009

You got paid how much to say that? --Pleb SYNDROME _{CUN medicate (butt poop!!!!)} 01:16, November 11, 2009 (UTC)

Not a thing actually, meargly the reward that someone else may share my joy and bathe in the light. Like evangelical Christianity but British.    Orian57    Talk   09:16 11 November 2009

Two things

First: Do you maintain the HowTo page?

And second, my government professor showed the class this video to prove how much better the Brits are than the Yanks: I must say I'm inclined to agree. :) • • • Necropaxx (T) {~} Wednesday, 07:21, Nov 11 2009

Well I rather empty promises and dissapointment to threats that will be carried out. Come on you reds! (and for the benifit of Americans our colour sceme is reveresed, Proving that your country is completely backwards.)    Orian57    Talk   09:11 11 November 2009

And I'm pretty sure it's socky that maintains the Why? and HowTo of late. At least it was.    Orian57    Talk   09:11 11 November 2009

Someone maintains the Why? and the HowTo?? Why? How? I thought they just existed. Oh and on the subject of Politics yes, we have a good way of checking the executive in PMQ's but it's flawed in itself. In the US the president is checked so much by the constitution that there is no real need for accountability through a mechanism like PMQ's, at least that is the constitutional point of view, in reality it would be better if congress could directly question the president on his activities. So yeah, I think we can all agree that America likes the constitution a bit too much. --ChiefjusticeDS 17:15, November 11, 2009 (UTC)

This is why I'm an engineering major. I don't have to deal with politics. Well, not a lot, anyway. • • • Necropaxx (T) {~} Wednesday, 22:41, Nov 11 2009

This is why I avoid engineering and do Politics. --ChiefjusticeDS 22:44, November 11, 2009 (UTC)

Wisdom

Care to do a quick drive-by and tell me what I'm missing. I tried to add a bit more text to the thing. -- Little Pink Sock 15:24, November 11, 2009 (UTC)

You missed all the fun. Again

I'm going to buy you a pager and place it in your underwear so you get a nice tremor everytime we have drama attacks. ~ 10:42, November 12, 2009 (UTC)

Drama attacks? Blame the namecalling kids for that. Idiots... UU, if you ever, ever want to hear any sort of replies to emails sent to me, just as everyone else, there's a rule of thumb that says that wikia doesn't mention your email address for any type of reply. Hence practically ignoring you since the last time I was verbally beat up to the point of crying. Anxiety attack medication and a whole lot of crying in bed later, I'm barely cooled down enough to sign my posts. I'm still sure had it been a heated discussion in a pub, I'd probably have been thrown out, but only after breaking some bones, punching and head-butting in some noses and administering some well earned knees in the scrotum areas of several of the users around here who blindly accuse another and bloat the fact that sannse saw her talk page with the link to an offensive picture before someone in irc told here there's VFD drama into an existential crisis about human rights. Come on! -- DameViktoria - (Contribs) - (Talk) - (Block log) 13:00, 12 Nov

Hey, real quick

I noticed that you blocked the personal-details IP for a year, but can you also delete and restore all versions of Gay except this one? We don't want the phone number staying on the site. Ty. --Andorin Kato 12:06, November 12, 2009 (UTC)

I remember the days when you had to look under the rim of a public toilet to find info like that. That's progress I suppose. Speaking of progress:    Orian57    Talk   05:12 13 November 2009

"When I was 14 I Couldn't Even Tell Victoria Wood I was Gay"

So I just watched a documentary "Coming Out at School" on how kids are coming Out (I think it's meant to have a capital now, to separate it from being released from detention centers) much earlier, I don't really know why I bothered, I was intending to watch "The Execution of Gary Glitter" because it's about bloody time this country did something about it's farcical punishments. But I got distracted. Anyway this thing was presented by the hilarious caricature called Qboy, whom you've never heard of. He "spits rimes" and "breaks stereotypes" and is the Jesus of our time. Probably. Anyway he went around various schools and talked to three identical people who all told him, with various degrees of lisp, that they used to get horribly bullied and they they came Out and it it all went away. Huzzah for them, society has progressed. Then Qboy (I'd like to stress now that he does seem like a stand up guy, I just hate hip-hop and documentaries that state the blindingly obvious) brought out this letter that he'd written to Victoria Wood, whom I've never heard of. Anyway that's where the title of this essay fits in, thus ending my joke.    Orian57    Talk   05:12 13 November 2009

It's bollocks. I have three teen sons and I know a bit about what the attitudes are towards homosexuality in the schools. While it's not as open as it used to be, it's still there, and because it's behind closed doors it's repressed and very nasty. In short, it terrifies me for a very personal reason. Pup

Sort of get that but not really... How's your youngest doing by the way, if you don't mind me asking? I know you're a lot more backwards down there. Also I'm now watching said "Execution" and I don't think it's specifically a bad idea.    Orian57    Talk   05:46 13 November 2009

He's out only to a few people at the moment, and they're all people who would be supportive of him. I haven't pressed him to come out any further or to stay in any longer. The reality is that nothing has really changed in regards to the way people treat him, but he's obviously a lot happier not feeling like he has to hide it all the time. Pup

Precisely what the documentary said. And yeah I'm not Out to everyone and I don't go shouting about it, but if people ask I don't deny it either. Which is basically how it should be. Also, I'm sort of worried I might be siding with The Sun (horrible right wing dribble of a news paper that features some porn on page three) in regard to this "kill the Paedos" drive they're on in this docu-drama.    Orian57    Talk   06:07 13 November 2009

Regardless of the issues involved it's worth watching, solely because of the horrendously tasteless ending sequence where he is hanged to a remix of one of his own songs.    Orian57    Talk   08:21 13 November 2009

I don't think I need to comment here, do I? --UU - natter 10:07, Nov 15

Yes, I came here to talk to you not DogBoy.    Orian57    Talk   13:59 15 November 2009

So You're insanely busy, right?

Care to tell us just how insane this insanity is? Is it a regular sort of insanity when your being told to do a few more things than normal and you were caught off guard or is it the fun sort of insanity where all of society is crumbling around you and people are butchering each other in the streets and only you can turn the tide of reason. You're not becoming part of InsanePedia are you?    Orian57    Talk   16:38 14 November 2009

Right now, it's "moving house next week, packing whole life into cardboard boxes" busy. Also, I won't have an internet in my new house of a couple of weeks, so this is pretty much gonna be an extended sort-of hiatus. I may pop on occasionally from work, depends if I get any down time. But last week I was getting in early, working through lunch and leaving late, and still had to work from home in the evenings and last weekend. So yeah, insanely busy. Speaking of which, I still have cardboard boxes to fill with stuff... --UU - natter 10:13, Nov 15

Thanks...

...for picking up those double redirects. I knew there were some there but couldn't work out quite how to locate them. Pup

Terribly sorry, sir...

... I wanted to tell you earlier about something... No, I'm not gay, or that I'm really a hairy faced guy with a beer gut the size of a small moon. But I may have been intentionally misleading some people. I'm packing up and leaving, but wanted to give you a gentle hug for the last time. -- Little Pink Sock 20:02, November 15, 2009 (UTC)

The amusing bit is that no-one noticed my minor edits. No wonder they accuse decent and nice people of never having done any contributions of value. The email user function for Luvvy still works, so if you ever want to chat, drop me a line via that. But I honestly can't see a reply-to address in the message Wikia sends to my mailbox via IP space unless it's in the message text, so if you want a reply, a sad as it sounds, you have to type in an email address. Cheers, Viktoria -- Little Pink Sock 22:10, November 15, 2009 (UTC)

Sorry, W. Hope this doesn't discourage you from taking on noobs/being awesome in general. --Pleb SYNDROME _{CUN medicate (butt poop!!!!)} 22:44, November 15, 2009 (UTC)

Cyberbully

My mistake, I thought it read John Goodman. Looks like you beat me to it. :) MadMax 12:09, November 26, 2009 (UTC)

ICU

Hey, could I ask where you feel eBaby lacks coherence? I don't see it at all myself. Cheers! :) --Thomas Rattim (talk)

We're sorry Under user cannot take your call right now please leave your message after the tone... *BEEP*    Orian57    Talk   22:31 26 November 2009

Hi there, I'm just passing briefly, so here's an answer: it's short, and it still doesn't really make much sense. There are two sections which are both little more than blocks of text, and they're not easy to follow - it may make sense to you, but you can understand your own thought process - I can't. try reading it and pretending you've just come across it yourself - how much sense does it make? There has to be a certain amount of logical structure to even nonsense prose, some sense to the nonsense, if you like (see Lewis Carrol's work for an example). Anyway, the point is: get it to make sense to other people, not just you. Get a pee review, which often helps to highlight where to improve an article. But yeah, in that state, not too many people are going to get that much from your article, beyond the punning title (I like puns). --UU - natter 15:28, Dec 2

We're sorry Thomas Rattim cannot take your call right now please leave your message after the tone... *BEEP*    Orian57    Talk   12:49 3 December 2009

You stop being busy. Now.

I feel abandoned. And lonely. And a bit feminine. ~ 13:49, December 7, 2009 (UTC)

Heh - talk about timing... --UU - natter 13:50, Dec 7

Santa needs help

If you're not already bored by it and have a spare 10 minutes, would you mind having a look at User:Sog1970/New Threat to Christmas again and let me know what you think. I've run out of steam a bit. --Sog1970 21:57, December 9, 2009 (UTC)

I have a spare minute and a half. That's enough to have a quick skim through and declare that I like it, but not enough to give any tips or feedback, I'm afraid. Seems like a pretty decent job already, I'd say. --UU - natter 16:52, Dec 10

Pantomime!

'ere biy.    Orian57    Talk   23:00 9 December 2009

Sounds good to me. I'll be an ugly sister, or something. Now, go have a mince pie. --UU - natter 10:24, Dec 10

Oh so you're making an example out of me? Twice? I never felt so loved.    Orian57    Talk   12:57 10 December 2009

Heh. "Loved". Oh yes. Your name isn't there to, for example, give people ideas, or anything... --UU - natter 13:08, Dec 10

That's even better you're inviting other people to give me attention too.    Orian57    Talk   16:49 10 December 2009

Since you're back

How about doing a review or two? I have two on the PEE list, would you mind doing one of them? • FreddThe Redd • • • 12:18, December 10, 2009 (UTC)

I'm not that back. I have enough time to do simple things, like deleting and banning. Reviews take at least an hour of my time - I don't have that kind of time yet. Maybe in a couple of weeks. --UU - natter 12:27, Dec 10

Whatever floats your goat. • FreddThe Redd • • • 12:29, December 10, 2009 (UTC)

I Can C U

Hey, UU, do UU like "The 40-Year-Old Virgin Who Knocked Up Sarah Marshall And Felt Superbad About It"? This could be a good title for an article. |Si Plebius Dato' Joe ang Pinoy CUN|IC Kill | 22:20, December 10, 2009 (UTC)

lol. you has my votes.    Orian57    Talk   23:10 10 December 2009

I hate all recent "parody" movies. That particular one looks like the worst idea in the history of creation. --UU - natter 11:40, Dec 11

Wait -- really?    Orian57    Talk   16:52 11 December 2009

Whoops

Apologies - better have another coffee and pay more attention. :-) Rabbi Techno kvetch Contribs FOXES 10:44, December 12, 2009 (UTC)

XSEED Games

YCan you please give back my XSEED Games article? The only reason I made it is so I could spread the word about Retro Game Challenge (which XSEED GAmes refuses to localize the sequel to due to poor sales) so the game could increase in demand so XSEED Games could eventually be convinced to localize the sequel (or at least be a cult following). I mean, you should give me some credit--after all, it IS my first article in Uncyclopedia. Fergzilla 21:03, December 14, 2009 (UTC)

You mean, like advertising something then? No - this is a humour wiki, we're not interested in you advertising your Game thing. Convince me a little more first. --UU - natter 22:25, Dec 14

E-mail and question

Please E-mail me my deleted page List of Doctor Who episodes.

I also ws wondering if i could finish it real quick, because i was very near completion when it was deleted.-Paul is the walrus 00:22, December 15, 2009 (UTC)

See your talk page. --UU - natter 10:16, Dec 15

Ninjewstar

You know what I'm referring to. --Pleb SYNDROME _{CUN medicate (butt poop!!!!)} 07:25, December 15, 2009 (UTC)

Hey, I never saw anything out of him. ~ 07:44, December 15, 2009 (UTC)

Like the Lord himself, I obviously move in mysterious ways... --UU - natter 10:17, Dec 15

Ah, I thought that this is due to the fact you have on short leg and one wooden leg. ~ 10:25, December 15, 2009 (UTC)

Comrad

Thanks to your vote Julius Malema is one step closer to becoming President of South Africa. Nice going. What a wonderful thing democracy is. Now surrender your property to the government and move along. Nothing to see here. Except the featured article on 14 Dec 2009

--BlueSpiritGuy 10:36, December 15, 2009 (UTC)

Can I...

...steal "Certainly sir, I can help you reset your password, can you just confirm your account number and password please? - Uttered by some moron at Sky Customer Services" for Who Invented Foxes? Rabbi Techno kvetch Contribs FOXES 11:49, December 15, 2009 (UTC)

Be my guest! --UU - natter 12:10, Dec 15

A thousand thankyous - your camels may forever graze within my pastures. Rabbi Techno kvetch Contribs FOXES 12:16, December 15, 2009 (UTC)

Can I...

Confirm your account number and password please? ~ 12:16, December 15, 2009 (UTC)

Certainly, my account number is chunkylover52 and my password is Homer Rocks! You're not going to use it for any underhand purposes, are you? --UU - natter 12:19, Dec 15

Never . You know me . I would never do such a thing . ~ 12:28, December 15, 2009 (UTC) .