User talk:ENeGMA

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To see my old conversations, you amoral eavesdropper you, click here: Archive 1

+S[edit source]

Mewhenreadingstupidstuff.gif Braydie thanks you for supporting him to become admin.
I would have done this sooner, but admins are supposed to be lazy.
There is no personalised message either.

Braydie at 23:52, 24 January 2007 (UTC)

Hey, Tree Fort the article that you put under WIP wasn't edited in 7 days. I've extended the WIP tag so that you can decide on what you want to do with it. Thanks. —Braydie at 13:06, 28 January 2007 (UTC)


BePrepared.jpg Braydie thanks you for voting for him to be Uncyclopedian of the Month January 2007.

Braydie at 15:29, 2 February 2007 (UTC)

Rewrite Michael Bay[edit source]

Ye tagged Michael Bay for NRV, and I decided maybe that it was salvagable. No, it's not the most complicated joke in the world. If ye care, tell me what ye think. --Nakedman 18:00, 2 February 2007 (UTC)

Good work. It's nice to see someone putting actual effort into their writing. --Sir ENeGMA (talk) GUN WotM PLS 19:32, 2 February 2007 (UTC)

Wank-a-chief[edit source]

This is a deliberate stub on the side of a main article Gahh! Moments. I will put in more work but it wasn't designed to be a big laugh in itself. AlanD 00:36, 8 February 2007 (UTC)

Well, just as a note, if an entire article can't be written on the topic, a stub probably shouldn't exist either. My advice would be to take the material from 'wank' and put it into the original article someway, because it too is a little on the short side. Try combining them by maybe giving wank its own section heading. It's not perfect, but it'd take less effort than finishing off two whole articles. As for Gahh, you've got a decent start, but try to fill it out more and add some pictures. Good luck! --Sir ENeGMA (talk) GUN WotM PLS 01:36, 8 February 2007 (UTC)

Honesty[edit source]

My best congrats on winning the Poo Lit with Honesty. It is a splendid article! Your work brings great honor to The Alliance of Planets Uncyc. ----OEJ 18:32, 12 February 2007 (UTC)

If I may second that - it's a fine piece of work. I like how it twists and turns and goes off in different and unexpected directions. --Sir Hardwick Fundlebuggy - (Ring for service) 19:53, 12 February 2007 (UTC)
Truly lofty praise coming from the likes of you, as tall as you both are. I wasn't sure, when I first wrote it, that it was any good and, if I may be...honest, and not fawning, I wrote this in imitation of your work, Hardwick. Immature poets imitate; mature poets steal. That's my motto, entirely of my own creation. Thanks dearly, both of you, and may you continue your brilliant article-writing ways. --Sir ENeGMA (talk) GUN WotM PLS 23:19, 12 February 2007 (UTC)

Speaking of money...[edit source]

You should contact Sannse @ to give her your address and receive the prize money. Please, do no ask her address in return. The last man to do so will regret it for the rest of this life, all 20 excruciating minutes of it.--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 13:17, 16 February 2007 (UTC)

I'm hoping to send out prizes tomorrow... do ya want one? There is not only the cash from our benevolent overlords at Wikia, but other exciting and valuable prizes too! So please let me know where to send them... ta -- sannse (talk) 08:54, 22 February 2007 (UTC)

Oh Crap[edit source]

Another Featured Article.....Mhaille wanders off to whore Merde, She Wrote... -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)

The peasants, they love me. --Sir ENeGMA (talk) GUN WotM PLS 14:12, 18 February 2007 (UTC)

Thanks![edit source]

Radio Announcer.jpg
Xylitol thanks you for voting him to be Article Narrator of the Month.

"You have transcended the status quo of coolness."

Xylitol 14:11, 11 March 2007 (UTC)

Thank you, thank you, thank you, etc.[edit source]

For voting for me for WoTM in March. Big Hugs, Dame PPsigPPlips.gifGUN PotY WotM 2xPotM 17xVFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 16:37, 1 April 2007 (UTC)

Short story[edit source]

Thanks for the expansion on this one. It's much more cultured now. Alksubsig.gifAlksub - VFH CM WA RV {talk} 20:29, 29 April 2007 (UTC)

You're very welcome. I enjoy helping out great articles. Sir ENeGMA (talk) GUN WotM PLS 22:36, 29 April 2007 (UTC)

UnNews:Noob Gets PWNED[edit source]

Thanks for the support.

Newcookie.gif Somebody has awarded you a cookie!
Now go play in traffic.

4/24/07. a day that will forever live in infamy in the hearts and minds of not just the American public, but the Globalwide Public. LeatherboundbooksTalkContributions 23:45, 1 May 2007 (UTC)

Sig[edit source]

Did you know the coloring of the letters in your sig makes it look like "Sir Enema"? If you did and it's a joke, I apologize for getting your hopes up with the new message message. If it's not, perhaps consider revision, because the color yellow doesn't show up on most people's computer well.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 13:51, 20 June 2007 (UTC)

Yeah, I've heard that 'afore. I like it. Sir ENeGMA (talk) GUN WotM PLS 16:05, 20 June 2007 (UTC)

Regarding the PLS judges[edit source]

I'm afraid the UF has been banned for a month, you might want to look for someone else...~Jewriken.GIF 16:18, 24 June 2007 (UTC)

Thanks for the heads up there. Sir ENeGMA (talk) GUN WotM PLS 16:40, 24 June 2007 (UTC)

/me hits ENeGMA on his talk page[edit source]

I would love to crush writers dreams. Uh, I mean judge. —Braydie 20:03, 24 June 2007 (UTC)

PLS[edit source]

Mr. ENeGMA, sir! I am here to volunteer for judging in the PLS. I have never entered in one, but I have five features thus far, with two more noms active at the moment (1 and 2 if you want to have a look-see). I was told that I'd be good for the job by e|m|c (blame him). I will do whatever you want me to do, and will judge more than one category if need be. I decided to post here as opposed to the forum topic, which I think is either dead or superceded by other PLS related stuff. Leave a message here or on my talk (your preference) telling me if you accept my application. (My userpage has all the stuff I've gotten on it if you need to look). Cheerio, Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 21:39, 24 June 2007 (UTC)

By the way, ENeG, are you going to specify that at least some of the images used for Best Illustrated articles need to be original material? —rc (t) 22:15, 24 June 2007 (UTC)

Way to hijack my topic, biatch! Love you, man. You're an admin, so I have to.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 22:38, 24 June 2007 (UTC)
I'm just trying to conserve section titles, man! Do you know how much CO2 those things put out? —rc (t) 22:41, 24 June 2007 (UTC)
Tell Insineratehymn that! He just wasted some on a section title that's the same as this one! By the way, ENeGMA, if you happen upon this anytime soon, read the long message that I posted above Rc's foolishness. That's the meat of this. Rc's just the bone. Which, I suppose, is desirable for sex-deprived individuals, but that's not why we're here.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 22:51, 24 June 2007 (UTC)

PLS[edit source]

I have done some magnificent rewrites in my time, and if I may ask, am I able to be one of the judges for best rewrite? --General Insineratehymn 22:30, 24 June 2007 (UTC)

Sure. Sir ENeGMA (talk) GUN WotM PLS 01:01, 25 June 2007 (UTC)

I'm wasting CO2![edit source]

Just wondering if there's a limit as to how many articles we could contribute to PLS. Thanks, this is my first one I'm not being dead or useless for :D --Littleboyonly.jpg TKFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFCK Oldmanonly.jpg 22:44, 24 June 2007 (UTC)

Congratulations[edit source]

On yet another featured article..... -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)

Well, it comes naturally to me... Thanks though. Sir ENeGMA (talk) GUN WotM PLS 12:22, 27 June 2007 (UTC)
Its become a dim and distant memory to me. ;) Must start whoring. -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)

pls, lead balloon, russian roulette[edit source]

i moved the article from best noob article to best rewrite article, because it's a rewrite. it's been moved back now though. i'd assumed that all rewrites would have to go into best rewrite

what if you do a rewrite of a howto, where does that go?

i think with the noob article not specifying mainspace/other/rewrite or illistrated, just means noobs have more options of which category they can enter their article into, to whichever they think they've most chance of winning, which seems gashy. good for them though i guess.

anyway there's already a rewrite up on pls for russian roulette, and now a russian roulette in best noob article. if by some chance they both do like top three of their category won't they both be put into the same mainspace?

not really making a point or a queery, just being hassly, feel free to feel free

- jack mort | cunt | talkKodamaIcon.jpg - 18:33, 27 June 2007 (UTC)

We came up with a compromise that, if both articles go far enough to be in the mainspace, LedBalloon's would go under the name of Russian Roulette, and mine would go as the HowTo. I assume this is what's going on, because that's where I last left off with Mr. ENeGMA. --Littleboyonly.jpg TKFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFCK Oldmanonly.jpg 18:36, 27 June 2007 (UTC)
Well, if the Best Noob category consisted only of articles by people who have been here fewer than three months, that are not alternate namespaces, that are not illustrated, and that are not rewrites, it'd be a mighty limited category, methinks. The purpose of Best Noob, as I understand it, is to give new users a chance to win something and be part of the community. Honestly, if we just wanted to reward the best 5 articles or whatever, we'd just toss 'em all in one big pot and noobs would almost be assured to not win. So what we're trying to do here is give new users something to shoot for, which hopefully translates into them staying around for a while. Consider it an investment. So the article should go in Best Noob, and we'll see how to deal with the name problem. Probably we'll just the name of one of them, but we'll deal with that later. And just by the way, I advise against moving things without my permission just to prevent this type of situation. Since I basically make up the rules as I go along, other people trying to interpret my not-yet-existent rules will inevitably fail. Just check with me on this sort of stuff. I very much appreciate that you and a few other people ARE helping out and checking articles, because it saves me a lot of work, but I'd just like to know exactly what's going on, so when someone bitch's at me for taking their article off the list or whatever, I know what to say. Thanks. Sir ENeGMA (talk) GUN WotM PLS 19:12, 27 June 2007 (UTC)
okay cool, all duly noted. last question, where there are three judges per category do you take a third each or each judge all of them? the later seems better, but i think there've been more entries every pls, how long do we get to judge? - jack mort | cunt | talkKodamaIcon.jpg - 12:30, 28 June 2007 (UTC)
Judges have a 2 week judging period after the competition. That's actually quite a long time, but it's sort of necessary because there have been problems with judge stability in the past. All judges judge all articles, and we combine those together to get the final tally. Sir ENeGMA (talk) GUN WotM PLS 13:42, 28 June 2007 (UTC)

Unprotect PLS page?[edit source]

Heya. A new user just posted on the PLS talk page that he couldn't list his entry because the page is semiprotected. I'm concerned that we may be losing possible contest entrants who see that they can't edit the page and don't bother to figure out why that is... hence I suggest we unprotect the page until the judging starts. Just wanted to see what you think since you're running the show. —rc (t) 22:58, 29 June 2007 (UTC)

Ah, yes, do away with the protection entirely. It's high-traffic enough that vandalism should be easily reverted, and it is important to allow new users to post their articles. Go right ahead. Sir ENeGMA (talk) GUN WotM PLS 23:01, 29 June 2007 (UTC)

Judging PLS[edit source]

ENeGMA, whilst I am flattered that you would ask me to help with PLS, I am going to be up to my neck in work starting tomorrow. Today is my last day of vacation, and the hounds of hell are barking at the gates. I can't say I will have the time to put into reading and judging entries. Sorry. ----OEJ 15:14, 30 June 2007 (UTC)

That's no problem. Thanks for considering it. Sir ENeGMA (talk) GUN WotM PLS 19:21, 30 June 2007 (UTC)

PLS Question[edit source]

Hya, could you take a look at this and let me know if it's ok with you? ~Jewriken.GIF 21:20, 2 July 2007 (UTC)

So...[edit source]

Do you intend to run the next PLS? --EMC [TALK] 23:36, 8 July 2007 (UTC)

No. Sir ENeGMA (talk) GUN WotM PLS 23:37, 8 July 2007 (UTC)
Oh goody. --EMC [TALK] 00:11, 9 July 2007 (UTC)
/me puts on his "PLS Winner and Judge" badge, steps in front of e|m|c, and *ahems*. -- §. | WotM | PLS | T | C | A 04:52, 9 July 2007 (UTC)
It seems to be a tradition that whoever has actually organised a PLS vows NEVER to do it again. Think it may have something to do with the fact that organising Uncyclopedians is like herding cats. -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)
Yeah, between people screaming "the competition isn't fair!" and "lighten up and let us have fun with this," it makes you want to start stabbing people at random.--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 11:23, 9 July 2007 (UTC)
Yes, and then you throw in the fact that I do that already, and we're really in a hell of a shape. Sir ENeGMA (talk) GUN WotM PLS 13:11, 9 July 2007 (UTC)
Anyhoo.....congratulations on running a great PLS, once the results are out you'll be able to have a nice long rest, whilst sniggering at the next poor sap to pick up the baton. :) -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)

Judging[edit source]

I'm not going to be able to finish my part in judging the PLS. Sorry to let you know on such short notice. --EMC [TALK] 19:37, 10 July 2007 (UTC)

Shouldn't be a problem. Thanks for telling me as soon as you did. Sir ENeGMA (talk) GUN WotM PLS 22:18, 10 July 2007 (UTC)
If you need anyone to judge this or the Best Rewrite let me know.... -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)
Actually, I might be able to finish. I'll try to make the deadline, but I still suggest finding an alternative judge in case I don't. Really sorry about this. --EMC [TALK] 17:33, 11 July 2007 (UTC)
If you get done judging, just sign your name and put down the results. But don't put your name down until you get done or are certain that you can, because I'll still be in contact with other potential judges. Sir ENeGMA (talk) GUN WotM PLS 19:52, 11 July 2007 (UTC)
I'm only three articles away from finishing my judging. I'm certain I'll be able to finish. Sorry to cause alarm. I feel like a jackass now. Oh well. --EMC [TALK] 03:59, 12 July 2007 (UTC)
It's alright. Half the fun of being a judge is being a jackass to people. Sir ENeGMA (talk) GUN WotM PLS 13:27, 12 July 2007 (UTC)
From where I'm sitting, it looks like you did a terrific job judging EMC, I don't know what all the fuss is about.  ;)--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 16:41, 12 July 2007 (UTC)
This is, of course, only being said because Cyanide happens to have a special place in my heart and in my choice for the #1 spot. :P --EMC [TALK] 18:41, 12 July 2007 (UTC)
How dare you make such a suggestion! It's scandalous! Also, you're probably right, but hey, you liked it, I liked it, maybe we know what we're talking about?--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 22:56, 12 July 2007 (UTC)

Judging (again)[edit source]

It's not really any of my business or anything, but don't you think that it might be a better idea to collate the results off-wiki via email or something? That's what we've done for the past couple of PLS contests, and it helps to keep the air of suspense/surprise until the winners are announced. I've already had one user say to me on IRC "Oh, I haven't won X category, I can see that". Just tryin' to help :) -- Sir Codeine K·H·P·B·M·N·C·U·Bu. · (Harangue) 18:45, 11 July 2007 (UTC)

I don't know. I'm basically copying what Brad did last time, which is this. And I enjoyed being able to keep track of the voting, as a writer. True, it breaks the secrecy, but we're a Wiki, we're supposed to be able to see everything. And it's too late anyway. But thanks for the advice. That might be a better way to do it, I just didn't give it any thought. Sir ENeGMA (talk) GUN WotM PLS 19:51, 11 July 2007 (UTC)
And while you're here, might you at all be interested in judging? You might not be needed at the moment, but it can be reasonably assumed that at least one judge will drop or not show up, so would mind being a possible alternate? Sir ENeGMA (talk) GUN WotM PLS 19:53, 11 July 2007 (UTC)

New Namespace Idea[edit source]

I read about you idea over at the village dump and wondered if something I've been working on over the past few weeks might be of use. I've been writing a series of articles by a fictional columnist called Tarquin Middleton who's very bitter about his increasing lack of writing talent, and is prepared do almost anything to get it back.

Anyway here it is:

User:Winstanley1/Works In Progress

Feel free to use it if its the sort of thing you're looking for. --Winstanley1 20:29, 13 July 2007 (UTC)

Yeah, that's pretty much the type of stuff I'm thinking of. I like it. Sir ENeGMA (talk) GUN WotM PLS 21:55, 13 July 2007 (UTC)

Question[edit source]

When judges all present their individual results, and those results are different, what happens?-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 00:20, 17 July 2007 (UTC)

We come up with some way of differentiating. Sir ENeGMA (talk) GUN WotM PLS 00:21, 17 July 2007 (UTC)
Heh? That doesn't seem right, or very informative for that matter. I need concrete answers, dammit! Also, if you don't know, I'd be glad to try to help you out.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 00:25, 17 July 2007 (UTC)
Well, I plan on just doing Article #1, 5 pts, #2, 4 pts, etc., and hope that doesn't result in any ties. Should it, I'll make something up as a tie breaker, maybe most #1s, or something like that. Sir ENeGMA (talk) GUN WotM PLS 00:40, 17 July 2007 (UTC)
Splendid.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 00:41, 17 July 2007 (UTC)
Another good idea would be to take the article that comes in 4th the most and call it the winner. Especially in the rewrite category. --Littleboyonly.jpg TKFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFUJewriken.GIFCK Oldmanonly.jpg 00:46, 17 July 2007 (UTC)
Or the article that appears in the top two spaces the most and is therefore a consensus. -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)
Or we could strike all entries and award Famine the Poet Lowrate for his entry. That would work too, though I don't think the rest of the people would be too happy with that.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 16:22, 18 July 2007 (UTC)

You Runs the PLS! And you didn't fuck it up! Congratulations![edit source]