User talk:Under user/Archive 21

While I think of it

Could I get you to have a look at the couple of things that I have in the PEEReview queue at the moment? I'm going through things in chronological order but I'm kind of stuck at the moment as I don't want to review Fruitopia, and the other two that are waiting in the queue are mine.

Second I had a sneak look at one-woman soap opera. I have to admit that the concept doesn't excite me at the moment, but as I recognised the archetype it could be potentially really good. Where are you intending to go with it? Pup TIME 10:37, 17/07/2009

Possibly, possibly not - I'm not doing a huge amount right now for a reason. No guarantees, but I might take a look at the weekend. Despite feeling shite I'm still at work - too much to do to have time off. Hope you don't mind, but I was looking to discuss OWSO with Orian for a reason, so I'll keep my counsel on that for now. --UU - natter 11:31, Jul 17

It's because I'm better than you Puppy. (Or that I'm like this but with a dick.) (Or actually, why me?) Also I did want your opinion on this It's not done as of now, but I might work on it between now and when you read this. I'm aware that the first chapter is pretty long but I can't think of anyway of cutting it back. And so over all it will probably turn out to be quite long. Is that gonna cause huge problems? It's just I love this concept and want to make the best of it.    Orian57    Talk   00:11 20 July 2009

@UU - is cool. No harm in asking.

@O57 - My opinion or UU's. (And what do you mean like this but with a dick. I'll have you know that I am a complete dick, that you very much.) Pup t 00:40, 20/07/2009

UU's because it's a bit pun-like and he likes that stuff. But yours'll do just fine, I'm sure.    Orian57    Talk   01:14 20 July 2009

Orian, I'll have a look at some point today. I do feel less shite this week, which is a good thing. --UU - natter 08:46, Jul 20

It is. :D And yeah, just whenever you can would be great.    Orian57    Talk   11:15 20 July 2009

Okay, had a look. Here's the beef: it's pretty good, I like the idea, and I can see you're on your way with it. However, it is heading in the direction marked "too long" which is a concern - kids of the ADD generation and all that. I think that it will stand pruning, however. My advice would be to start by getting the whole thing written out so you have the complete story arc in it, and are pretty satisfied with how the narrative pans out. But then stand back for a day or two, don't look at it, try not to even think about it, then go back and be utterly ruthless. (Did I use enough italics there?) Cut out bits that aren't utterly necessary, particularly bits you like but might be able to use in something else. Honestly, keep it streamlined. I think you may be going into too much detail where you don't need to (and paradoxically, not going into enough detail once or twice - you make the occasional leap of logic that needs a little effort to follow - watch out for that too). And when you think it's done, get someone to have a proofread through it! ;-) Good luck, as ever!

As to One-Woman SO, I was wanting to see if I could sketch out an encyclopedic style article about it, and then ask someone to add a small sprinkling of neurosis to some of the sections. If I ever write it. Kind of third person encyclopedic neurosis - reckon you'd be up for it, if I ever get it to that stage? --UU - natter 13:43, Jul 20

Yeah. But in my defense a lot of its length comes from dialogue, and The Frogs. Although I might just remove it from here and write a novel instead. Kinda been thinking about writing a couple of humour novels, there aren't really enough of them. And I don't want to be restricted to a genre. But I do know what you mean. I'll think about this for a while. as for OWSO (Ow-so!) I'll see what I can do when you've done what you want (although third person neurosis is a bit outside of my scope I mean it's two people away!). Be cool to collab with you because when it's featured I'll still be ahead of you!    Orian57    Talk   17:19 20 July 2009

Also you never got round to telling me what you thought of this?    Orian57    Talk   17:24 20 July 2009

It got featured, right? Why do you still need my opinion on top of that? --UU - natter 08:48, Jul 21

I don't need your opinion, I'd just quite like it, you know, better late than never.    Orian57    Talk   11:57 21 July 2009

How about this: congratulations on having more features than me - you deserve it, it's a reward for all the hard work and good writing (and whoring) you've been doing. Will that do? --UU - natter 12:14, Jul 21

Well no. I wasn't rubbing in the fact that I have more features than you (this one is only #13), I just wanted to know if you liked it or not. Which I couldn't decern from it being featured, and you didn't vote. Cos you see, when I sit down to write an article the first thing I think about is "Will UU like this?" and I then I work from there. I just wanted to know if this met your standards... LOLJOKE! but seriously.    Orian57    Talk   12:26 21 July 2009

That's his first person neurosis kicking into action. Speaking of which, what about me? Pup t 09:34, 21/07/2009

Sorry Puppy, this may be the first month in nearly 2 years that I don't do a single review. I just don't have the time. And by that, I mean that I usually take a good hour to do a review, reading the article several times and considering my feedback carefully. I have a minute here and a minute there to make quick edits, but I don't have the luxury of an hour to really give an article the attention it deserves for a decent review. That's why I'm being noncommittal about stuff at the moment. It's been like that for a while, and I'm getting frustrated with it - I want to roar back to form, churn out a few reviews and articles, but I just can't get free to do it. Very frustrating. And I have to say that your base numbers article would demand quite a bit of my time, on the basis of the glance I've had so far, I'd need to take quite a bit of time to make sure I didn't miss anything important, and gave you a proper review. Banning, deleting and occasional banter - that's about all I'm good for at present. Sounds like a stuck record, huh? Feels like it too. --UU - natter 09:41, Jul 21

Way to make me feel guilty. I was actually just displaying my neurosis, not trying to get the review done. I've had one review done recently that's already giving me a bit of work to do. And I know what you mean about the time taken. I usually put about 3 hours into a review - figure if the author thinks it's good enough to review then me doing a half assed job is an insult. At the moment I'm putting out an average of one main-space article and one decent review a day, and it's a full time job. Pup t 11:10, 21/07/2009

No guilt trip intended - I just pride myself on helping out where I can, and so hate having to tell people I can't help out at the moment. --UU - natter 12:16, Jul 21

pee review query

would you care to weigh in on the conversation here? i've apparently grown so old i can't distinguish between uncyclopedia guidelines and my own policies, it may seem... SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 16:36, 17 July 2009 (UTC)

Looks like MrN's drive-by took care of what I'd have said. --UU - natter 08:48, Jul 20

Oh, lookie!

THANK YOU! In appreciation for tolerating me when PMSing I wish to thank you by handing you this lovely sample of potted cactus erectus, found in my backyard. For your enjoyment and pleasure. Love and respect ~ Huggybear

-- DameViktoria - (Contribs) - (Talk) - (Block log) 21:24, 19 Jul

Ah, how nice. I shall place it with the rest of the UU garden - an interesting collection of mould on the paving slabs, and a large nettle growing through a crack in the paving slabs. This will take pride of place! --UU - natter 08:50, Jul 20

Me breaks a vial of smallpox and then runs away

Haha you have death now.    Orian57    Talk   10:53 20 July 2009

You both realise the "more beer" thing from an earlier post was just a joke, don't you? Stupid game anyway. Pup t 12:01, 20/07/2009

Hang on, wha? Your smallpox cannot harm me - my sewer lid is like a shield of steel. Largely because it's made of steel. And as to this "more beer" thing - what? Where? Keep it away. Foul muck, beer. Give me a nice single malt whisky any time. --UU - natter 12:18, Jul 20

Single malt whisky? Are like sixty?    Orian57    Talk   12:38 20 July 2009

Hey! I happen to have a very nice single malt collection! Also, what kind of a Scot are you?! ~ 12:45, 20 July 2009 (UTC)

Mordillo, I'm not sure how good of an argument that is since you do happen to be, in fact, sixty. Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 13:44, 20 July 2009 (UTC)

I've been drinking single malt since I was fifteen eighteen. What the hell does age have to do with it? (Obviously it has a lot to do with the quality of the whisky - I had a Speyside malt that was older than me as a birthday treat last year. Absolutely superb). And also obviously, the answer to Mordillo's question is "a gay one". Bet it if was thicker, white and salty he'd be gulping it down... ---UU - natter 13:55, Jul 20

Semen is salty? How does one find this out?

On a lighter note, is 18 the drinking age in GB? Or is it like Ireland, where there is only a reverse-drinking age? Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 14:28, 20 July 2009 (UTC)

Semen? Who mentioned semen? I was thinking of sour milk. Obviously. So the question should be: how did you find out, Woody? Hmm?

Yes, we can legally get pissed at 18 here. I remember going to California when I was 20 and being stunned that I didn't get served because I wasn't 21. I had to pull a barmaid to finally get drinks on that holiday. (And because they don't seem to know what Whisky is around Tahoe, it had to be Southern Comfort as well. That really took the piss). --UU - natter 14:38, Jul 20

Less Scottish than I am? I actually hope I'll be able to sample Mordillo's epic Single Malt collection some beautiful day. It's yummeeh... -- DameViktoria - (Contribs) - (Talk) - (Block log) 14:42, 20 Jul

The 21 drinking age is a bunch of BS. I blame the uptight parents that we seem to have in so much abbundance around here. The 21 drinking age doesn't stop drinking, it just promotes underage drinking. Gotta love the laws in America, backwards until the bitter end. Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 14:43, 20 July 2009 (UTC)

I'll have you know that semen is actually pretty damned disgusting. I mean, from what I've been told. And saying "older than me" when your so vague about your age (that's fine btw I'm not overly fussed) is about as helpful as saying "sometime before now"    Orian57    Talk   17:09 20 July 2009

"From what I've been told." Ha. ~ 14:23, 21 July 2009 (UTC)

My mouth is a virgin.    Orian57    Talk   14:24 21 July 2009

Ha. ~ 14:25, 21 July 2009 (UTC)

No really! You try being gay in the far north of scotland and tehn see how much oral you get! me eats ice cream    Orian57    Talk   14:45 21 July 2009

I rather be a heterosexual in Amsterdam if you don't mind. Although the sight of men in kilts is...strangely...appealing...~ 14:54, 21 July 2009 (UTC)

so basically you're into trannies? Frankly I think they're revolting.    Orian57    Talk   14:56 21 July 2009

I think Mordillo meant "appalling" ;-) (His English is still better than my Hebrew though...) --UU - natter 15:08, Jul 21

So basically UU's transphobic. Now at least we know the truth...    Orian57    Talk   15:15 21 July 2009

No no, I meant appealing. And no, no trannies - just strong Scottish men wearing kilts. Oh my. ~ 15:26, 21 July 2009 (UTC)

Oh man, you should see our strong American women wearing dress-suits! Try keeping it down after you see some of that! Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 15:29, 21 July 2009 (UTC)

Well... Finnish-Scottish Luvvies in kilts are okay. And they're okay in suits, too... And you should see me in my corset + fatigues + high heeled boots combo. I've got a few guys telling me I can't exist, since I'm a walking paradox O_o -- DameViktoria - (Contribs) - (Talk) - (Block log) 21:38, 21 Jul

That's funny, because they say the same about me when I wear my corset, fatigues and thigh high boots as well. Pup t 22:21, 21/07/2009

The difference is, I've got bewbies and a very nice pair of smooth, hair-less legs... -- DameViktoria - (Contribs) - (Talk) - (Block log) 22:35, 21 Jul

True, it has been a while since I shaved my legs. As to the other... Pup t 23:21, 21/07/2009

No offense to you, Luvvy, but I've never liked high-heel boots. I don't like the look of 'em.... Just like those damn Swiss.... Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 00:28, 22 July 2009 (UTC)

What about the thigh high boots? Pup t 00:38, 22/07/2009

I'm confused.

First of all, Jesus your administration is quick. I hardly even put the article up and you started asking me difficult questions! I have to say though, I didn't find it very clear how I should respond... hope I'm doing it right!

Anyway, I went to India once on holiday, and I heard this crazy story about a legendary bat that lives in a cave and steals babies and stuff. They told it in a really impressive way, so it stuck. And I started thinking, 'why not run with it?' So I extrapolated it a bit, and well, the whole story is basically on the page. Just thought I would share my insanity with the world. – Preceding unsigned comment added by NazruhHunter (talk • contribs)

See your talk page. --UU - natter 13:51, Jul 21

Thatching

Thanks for the input (she said.) The only thing I really want is for the Thatcher article to be funny when I'm done from it. You're from England, and I'm Scots Diaspora so my knowledge of what the Brits as a whole currently find funny is limited to Monty Python, Chewin the Fat, and Mock the Week. I'm sure spitting image has a lot of great stealable jokes suggestions, so I'll have to torrent some episodes acquire DVDs through legal means. Oh, and I'm a history major, so I've got that down. When I work on it more, I'll pop back over and ask the really important question: Do you want to come back to my place? Is it funny? Ollie Garkey 19:50, 21 July 2009 (UTC)

I've got my eye on you, slut. You leave my UU alone...    Orian57    Talk   20:04 21 July 2009

Sounds good - good luck! --UU - natter 09:14, Jul 22

hey

How do I enable e-emailing? --Docile hippopotamus 06:15, 22 July 2009 (UTC)

Go to Preferences in the upper right corner-ish area of the screen, User Preferences and add an email address to the appropriate location. Then scroll down to the E-mail menu and tick the boxes that please you. The email user thing is linked to with Special:EmailUser/<username>, like some users have in their user page's navigation bar, if they have one. -- DameViktoria - (Contribs) - (Talk) - (Block log) 09:11, 22 Jul

And a little addition, remember to save the preferences change... ^_^ -- DameViktoria - (Contribs) - (Talk) - (Block log) 09:12, 22 Jul

Which is almost the same as what I'd typed, before the edit conflict showed I'd been beaten to it. --UU - natter 09:13, Jul 22

We all need at least one edit conflict in the morning... *snuggles UU to make it all better again* -- DameViktoria - (Contribs) - (Talk) - (Block log) 09:17, 22 Jul

Monmouth review review

I just read your comments... I'm happy to drag back the "story" in the reviews and keep them fairly straight, I appreciate the feedback. I will avoid making this mistake again. I just wanted you to know my hidden thoughts though. Pup t 02:15, 23/07/2009

Actually, I've just had a look at how many reviews you've done comparative to myself, and the percentages of quality review. I'm happy to take your advice on it. Pup t 04:25, 23/07/2009

Glad to hear it. --UU - natter 07:36, Jul 23

Got three words about the Ashes:

Australia will win.

AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE! OI! OI! OI! Come on, you think that Australia ain't going to win, UU?

This is living proof that Australia is better than England. After all, you gave Australia to the world, eh? |Si Plebius Dato' Joe ang Kemador CUN|IC Kill | 07:18, 23 July 2009 (UTC)

Gosh, what a friendly thing to arrive to in the morning. I think the last test proved it's an open series this time. Anyone can win, although if the Aussies are going to manage it, their bowlers are going to have to play a lot better than they did at Lords - Siddle notwithstanding. Shorn of a lot of marquee names though, Australia are a trifle too reliant on Punter and Clarke, although that's probably better than being wayyy too reliant on Flintoff. At least they're a little less injury-prone! Finally, having grown up enduring almost permanent Aussie dominance in the Ashes, the main thing I want from any given series is to put the mockers on Glenn McGrath's "five nil" prediction, so as far as I'm concerned: job done! --UU - natter 07:35, Jul 23

I haven't bothered following cricket in 20 years, but this has been a great Ashes so far even from a Welshman's - such as myself - perspective. Incidentally, we're thrashing the Aussies in the Tour de France too. Brit Bradley Wiggins looks set for third or even second place on the winner's podium, Aussie Cadel Evans is going slooooooow. Don't know what all the fuss is about re. Wimbledon, there's other sports we account for ourselves pretty well in. :-) Rabbi Techno kvetch Contribs FOXES 07:54, 23 July 2009 (UTC)

As an Australian, all I can say is, I HATE Ricky Ponting. Pup t 09:04, 23/07/2009

Does my memory deceive me...

Or did you boot out a Bill Cosby obsessive a few days back? Same person or...could it be...Cosby still has two fans in this world? Perhaps we shall never know. Rabbi Techno kvetch Contribs FOXES 07:54, 23 July 2009 (UTC)

Same Cosby/rascist article that has been used to replace an existing article? I've reverted it once or twice so far. Pup t 09:05, 23/07/2009

All things are possible. I was just dropping in to add the vacation template to my userpage, and figured I'd ban an idiot while I was at it. Making any further connections than that would have required time, effort and other things unavailable to me at that point. --UU - natter 08:39, Jul 27

Pornopedia

HiUnder!
I just wanted to ask if it would be aall rightto let me come up again with the Pornopedia article. I understand the reasons of the deletion and I am asking a second chance to create a more funny and "usefull" article that would deserve to exist in Uncyclopedia. I'm looking forward to receiving your response.--Biris 08:10, 24 July 2009 (UTC)
I really appreciate the undeletion, Under, you are very kind!!! Thank you very much. I will write a great article. Have a nice day--Biris 08:33, 27 July 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost: July 23rd, 2009

The Uncyclopedia UnSignpost

Word to your mother.

July 23rd, 2009 • Issue 57 • The Newspaper That Won't Tell Everyone That You Wet the Bed! Oops...

Uncyclopedia Users Form Fantasy Football League By Gerrycheevers This week, several Uncyclopedians banded together under the leadership of one Guildensternenstein to form some sort of "Fantasy Football" organization. What exactly this entails is unclear, but it appears that the football- and soccer-related fantasies of the participating members will be carried out in the semi-private confines of the forums. Reactions were mixed to this development, with some users expressing emotions ranging from apathy to indifference. Others voiced concern about children, decency, and lewd public conduct. "My little boy came home today saying something about going to another boy's house to perform football fantasies!" said one outraged and confused mother. Regardless of the small amount of negative feedback, participants are eager to begin fantasizing about their favorite football players, such as David Beckham. Bradaphraser had this to say: "The Fantasy Football League is a chance for Uncyclopedians to get away from the hustle and bustle of everyday Uncyclopedia work and actually have some fun for a change. While I usually am busy with the administrating task of sitting on my lazy ass and doing nothing, this gives users a chance to see me in a more relaxed state." "I fully expect that this venture will be just as successful as my recent run for the Presidency," continued Brad, "which I lost to Bradford Lyttle of the Pacifist party by a mere 110 votes. I fully expect to win one or possibly even two games in this upcoming season, assuming of course that a draft is eventually held." Said draft is scheduled to begin immediately, and assuming only a small portion of footballers flee to Canada to evade this draft, the Uncyclopedia Fantasy Football League will be ready to hold its first game by opening day. Village Dump Suffers From Rash of Inactivity By Gerrycheevers In a startling development, activity on Uncyclopedia's main gathering place, the Village Dump, has all but ceased. With The UnIdiot registering the sole comment in the last three full days, the normal flow of important, relevant conversation in the Forums appears to have dried up. While an excess of users can usually be found loitering aimlessly in the halls of the Dump, it appeared all but deserted as of press time. Several theories have been raised, ranging from the intriguingly possible (July weather causes Uncyclopedians to go outside) to the exceedingly headache-inducing (Uncyclopedians are being abducted by giant space cabbages). However, one of the more interesting theories comes from our lead scientist and nature correspondant, DogNewspaper (unavailable for picture). He claims that while the Village Dump itself along with associated forums such as the Ministry of Love and the Help forum has seen a decline in activity, the so-called Benson's House of Pancakes has seen a shocking upswing in activity. In the same time frame that only a single edit was made in the Village Dump, sixteen different topics were edited in Benson's Breakfast Domicile. DogNewspaper, that earlier mentioned nature correspondant, calls this a migration. "Woof," he claimed, elaborating that many users were unable to adapt to conditions found in the normal Village Dump, and were forced to relocate to the more hospitable Benson-related location. It is here, in the BHOP, that users are free to create topics concerning their own birthdays, the anniversaries of their birth, and memorials commemorating the day they were born. Whether the mass exodus is complete or not has yet to be seen.

Check out these pages! US vs UK, the showdown... almost Picture Wars: Forum Edition Still counting to a million From our logs: 03:45, 23 July 2009 Under user blocked Mi$ter Bigg (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 1 week ‎ (insert Cosby catchphrase here. or not - I don't really give two fucks) 00:48, 20 July 2009 TheLedBalloon blocked 71.195.100.104 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 week ‎ (In the words of Abraham Lincoln, suck my presidential cock, bitch!) 06:30, 18 July 2009 Mordillo blocked Speroxenos (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 1 month ‎ (your hard on does not impress me) Biopic of the Week Arguably the most prominent sub-primate whose existance status varies depending on the day of the week on the entire wiki, An Ape that Only Exists on Thursdays has recently made a return to Uncyclopedia. His track record speaks for itself: awesome articles abound in Ape's presence, his handling of breaking news situations is praiseworthy, and his information guides are useful and informative. Welcome back, Ape! Old School Featured Article of the Week Toilet Door Communication, or TDC, is considered by many to be the forerunner of the modern internet. This fascinating form of conversation is complete with its own exceedingly dense jargon and wide spectrum of users. Washing your hands after use is strongly recommended. Quote of the Week <Bonner> A while later we also completely wrapped the scooter in cling film <Bonner> I still have the photos, he was really pissed about that one <e|m|c> You mean saran wrap. <e|m|c> Fucking English. <Bonner> Cling flim <e|m|c> Uhh. Saran wrap. <Bonner> cling film <Bonner> :) <e|m|c> Cling film <Bonner> Saran wrap <e|m|c> Correct. This Week in Uncyc, 1901 Uncyclopedia users celebrated their first of many week-long tributes to Oscar Wilde, unable to wait the originally planned year after his death. The entire main page was dedicated to Wilde-related issues, and the first instance of mass Wilde quoting ensued. Reader Poll of the Week The editors need your help; please weigh in here on the important, non-boring issue of UnSignpost formatting.

UnSignpost Main Page • Contact the Editors • Sign Up for Delivery • Get the Userbox

This edition is on time, and anyone who tells you differently is lying! THEDUDEBOT Armed and Ready Say The Word 04:58, 25 July 2009 (UTC)

I saw that!

Ha! caught ya! /me snuggles UU -- DameViktoria - (Contribs) - (Talk) - (Block log) 08:34, 27 Jul

Mmm hmm - did you see what it said? Also: curses, caught in a hugtrap - if only they weren't so moreish... --UU - natter 08:36, Jul 27

Hugtraps are great! ^_^ -- DameViktoria - (Contribs) - (Talk) - (Block log) 09:11, 27 Jul

I saw that too!

Ha! caught ya! /me snuggles UU Pup t 09:58, 27/07/2009

Group snuggle! ^_^ -- DameViktoria - (Contribs) - (Talk) - (Block log) 12:58, 27 Jul

Gonna be a dad!?

Told you. I told you - I did - it's in your archives! That's what straight people do. Seriously though, big congratulations! I presume that's what the last two headers are about but, you know, this clears it up for anyone who doesn't routinely read your user page. :D    Orian57    Talk   11:03 27 July 2009

I'm not entirely sure that's what the last two headers are about myself, but thanks - I am terrified! --UU - natter 11:23, Jul 27

I saw it too, though I'll refrain from a manly embrace if that's okay. ^_^ Congratulations!!! Your life will never be the same again, and that's a good thing. Nearly entirely. Like 99.999% of the time. The other 0.001% you'll possibly be lamenting the greying of your hair, and it's partial or complete loss; the fraying of your sanity (and it's partial or complete loss); and the diminishment of your free time (possibly also a complete loss). But the drawings, the songs they'll make up for you, that smile and the look in their eyes that says, "I love you, and may have also wet myself" — priceless.  :) --T. (talk) 11:43, 27 July 2009 (UTC)

Mazel Tov! Thought of any potential names yet? -- T​K​F​​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​UU​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​CK 11:45, 27 July 2009 (UTC)

Oh I have! I like Josuah, or Joshy untill he turns seven and become too big for the Y.    Orian57    Talk   11:47 27 July 2009

Ah, I like, a nice traditional name, straight from the bible. Don't discount Job or Deuteronomy either, though. They're both coming back in style here in Semi-Queens. -- T​K​F​​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​UU​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​CK 11:50, 27 July 2009 (UTC)

I called my eldest Alexander as I love the name Xander (pre-Buffy), and he's been called Alex his entire life. He's now old enough to drive. Called my second Jordan after the river as I was going through a religious phase and thought I'll never stop being a god-botherer. Called my youngest Max because I'd given up trying to think of a cool name by then (although it's really Maximillian, due to my love of money.) I had really cool girls names as well... Pup t 11:54, 27/07/2009

Under David? Joshua User? Ubrahim Ugeorge? ~ 12:08, 27 July 2009 (UTC)

Lol, Under David. They'd never get through school.    Orian57    Talk   12:14 27 July 2009

Thanks folks! Mrs UU has a stack of names for boys and girls, and out of those, I like one of each. So that should be an easy choice. They are likely to be slightly less biblical owing to our devout atheism. The important thing is that we know there is only one of it. That makes things... still terrifying, but 50% less terrifying than it would otherwise have been! --UU - natter 12:35, Jul 27

clearly the child will be named Gerry Cheevers User. congrats UU! SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 12:19, 27 July 2009 (UTC)

I think that if this carries on much longer we might need a forum topic.    Orian57    Talk   12:21 27 July 2009

Hell, that schmuck Tom Mayfair got his own topic when he had a kid. I don't see why not. *waits for someone else to go through the trouble* -- T​K​F​​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​UU​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​CK 12:28, 27 July 2009 (UTC)

I think if I keep getting edit conflicted I'm going to have to lock my talk page! ;-) Cheers all! --UU - natter 12:35, Jul 27

You're going to have biological offspring?! Yay! Are you still horribly shocked? :D -- DameViktoria - (Contribs) - (Talk) - (Block log) 13:02, 27 Jul

I don't know about shocked, as it was planned. Doesn't stop me being terrified though. I went up the Sydney Harbour Bridge last year, which was also planned, and I was terrified the whole way up that as well. A worthwhile experience, and I'm glad I did it, but damn. And as long as you don't over-extend that metaphor, it's fairly accurate! ;-) --UU - natter 15:13, Jul 27

Hang on... me puts detective coat and hat on Are you HAVING A BABY!?!? No, but seriously, congrats! Nameable • mumble? • (UnScr:PWotM) 18:01, 27 July 2009 (UTC)

Wait you're having a baby!? Is that right!? I thought you were just gonna steal one or something... Shit dude, good luck.    Orian57    Talk   20:34 27 July 2009

It's clear that Mr user has been thoroughly on top of things. MrN 20:41, Jul 27

You may need this fairly soon too. Pup t 23:10, 27/07/2009

I think I should make it clear that I, personally, physically, am not having the baby. I'm happy to leave the morning sickness, inability to sleep in a comfortable position, total lack of energy, expanding waistline and so forth to the missus, like any good gentleman. --UU - natter 12:30, Jul 29

I feel compelled to file a complaint on behalf of that missus of yours, Mister! /me sulks -- DameViktoria - (Contribs) - (Talk) - (Block log) 20:23, 29 Jul

While I, on the other hand, am doing all of the cooking, cleaning, shopping, pampering and general taking care of the good lady - ie the things I can do. Sheesh... ;-) --UU - natter 21:04, Jul 29

Did No one else get Mr.N's fantastic sex joke up there? I like that one. Whelp, regardless, good luck with your brand new parasite. I hope yours is better than mine... stupid tapeworms... Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 20:39, 29 July 2009 (UTC)

Actually they don't look so bad - I mean they're hideous - but you can eat all the food you want and you loose weight. I'm really surprised people don't sell them. I mean they probably start eating your guts if they get big enough but that's basically a price I'm willing to pay.    Orian57    Talk   00:30 30 July 2009

Ummm... Are you sure about that? Pup t 05:19, 30/07/2009

I must say that, as conversations go, this could be the most varied. We've gone from fatherhood and babies to tape worms and diseases.    Orian57    Talk   05:59 30 July 2009

Congratulations UU! I too wish to extend a congratulatory hug. Also to Mrs. UU ^_^ --^Dame 12:15, 30 July 2009 (UTC)

Thanks Sonje. And Woody. --UU - natter 13:18, Jul 30

Hey UU, I'm pretty sure I'm extremely late on this, but congratulations! Make sure you teach him/her to like music that doesn't suck. Nothing says 'welcome to the world new baby' like Led Zeppelin's Immigrant Song. - T.L.B. WotM, UotM, FPrize, AotM, ANotM, PLS, UN:HS, GUN 02:48, Aug 4

Or Cannibal Corpse's Necropedophile for that matter... I got to admit, its the sickest song ever written.. Also, I'm sorry for being late, I havent been around for a while. Congratulations :) Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 03:00 August 4 '09

Thank you

It's been a while since I've been on Uncyclopedia, and I'm not entirely sure if I ever properly thanked you for your review of my article, Call from Grandma. Because I am just starting to write, any feedback of any kind is greatly appreciated. I will take your suggestions for improvement and put them into great consideration the next time I edit the article. Thanks again. —AlbinoZombie 21:29, 27 July 2009 (UTC)

No problem, good luck. And quick tip: don't edit archives, people don't always notice it! --UU - natter 08:18, Jul 28

Hey UU

You around? There's a lot of double redirects today, and they're all protected, so I can't correct them. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 10:54, 29 July 2009 (UTC)

I'm sort of here, but sort of not. I'm dipping in and doing stuff I feel like. I did see those redirects, and if I get a few uninspired and empty minutes. I may even properly check ban patrol. We'll see. --UU - natter 12:27, Jul 29

There you go, un-double-redirected. Deep joy. --UU - natter 13:32, Jul 29

I don't think I've said this yet, so... Congratulations with your newly acquired fatherhood! —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 21:07, 29 July 2009 (UTC)

'Newly acquired'? Not yet.. 'Impending', more like - won't actually get here until february! And thanks. --UU - natter 09:52, Jul 30

I know someone who was also born in february. It's like we're related.    Orian57    Talk   12:57 30 July 2009

I did flirting today

It was horrible. Wanna know more, text me on 0800 FUCK-UP.    Orian57    Talk   17:43 29 July 2009

And if I don't want to know more? --UU - natter 21:05, Jul 29

I'll cry. And I won't stop until you listen to my vaguely humourous story. You're gonna have to get used to that sort of emotional blackmail. (Also you need to get used to everyone saying "You'll have to get used to it").    Orian57    Talk   00:27 30 July 2009

Emotional blackmail? That's one step away from terrorism, and I. Will. Not. Negotiate. With. Terrorists. (/President in bad action movie) --UU - natter 09:55, Jul 30

Yeah but you'll have to get used to it!    Orian57    Talk   12:58 30 July 2009

Hey dude

Or should I say hey dad? Congratulations are in order I suppose. You don't have to name it Chris you know... -OptyC Sucks! CUN20:57, 29 Jul

Because Optimuschris would be so much more fun.    Orian57    Talk   01:11 30 July 2009

You're old enough and geek enough

To appreciate the fact that a Tron sequel is in the making. I wasn't that excited since The Love Boat's new series! ~ 21:19, 29 July 2009 (UTC)

I jizzed in my pants when I read that. -OptyC Sucks! CUN21:34, 29 Jul

That was probably too much information. Probably. ~ 21:35, 29 July 2009 (UTC)

Actually, I was slightly worried when I heard that. How many really, truly good Hollywood remakes/updates/re-imaginings/reboots/long-delayed sequels have there actually been in the history of all things ever? They did a straight-to-DVD Lost Boys sequel not too long back, for god's sake. Honestly, I'd be very happy to be surprised, but I'm expecting it to suck Bruce Boxleitner's balls. --UU - natter 21:39, Jul 29

No idea what your talking about here but I actually thought Poseidon was better than The Poseidon adventure, and it was one of my favourites to begin with.    Orian57    Talk   07:18 30 July 2009

Orian, you're too young to remember! Let the old sods drink over their cups of tea! ~ 07:20, 30 July 2009 (UTC)

Rollerball (1970s original): pretty good movie. Rollerball (lame remake from last 10 years or so): utter, utter shite. The prosecution rests, yeronner. --UU - natter 09:57, Jul 30

I tried to explain to my progeny why Tron was so cool. I gave up. Pup t 12:39, 30/07/2009

Oh, and speaking of remakes, there's a fairly recent Punisher movie (that I haven't seen) but it had to be an improvement on the Dolf Lungren version. Pup t 12:40, 30/07/2009

That's like saying that something really shite is an improvement on something really, really shite. True, but a bit pointless. And Tron is cool because it stars a guy called Bruce Boxleitner, which is one of my favourite names ever. Mind you, that rule doesn't apply to all the stuff he's been in, but I believe it still holds up for Tron. --UU - natter 13:13, Jul 30

Proofreading Service question

Is it still active? If so, how long should it take between a proofread request (i.e. the placing of {{Proofread}} on this article) and proofread completion (i.e. the removal of said template from said article following, well, a complete proofread)? I requested one yesterday, and no proofread seems to have been done as of yet, so I'm whining attempting to discuss it with a wiser user (as per previous discussion regarding the article) before I whine broach the subject on the forums.

Thanks. MacMania 23:48, 29 July 2009 (UTC)

Please disregard, as said proofread request has been fulfilled. Sorry. MacMania 00:48, 30 July 2009 (UTC)

As a general rule, it's best not to expect next-day service on anything you request on this here wiki. People do things when they have time, which isn't also straight away. There can be periods when no-one checks the proofread list for days, and other periods when they proofread everything in sight. It depends. I've seen requests sit there for ages, and requests snapped up in minutes. I've also seen things you... people wouldn't believe, like attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion, but that's a separate issue. So the answer is: requests take as long as they take. On this occasion, I'd say you got lucky! --UU - natter 10:02, Jul 30

This looks weird

User:Someperson/Glenn Beck likes to shoot people at the movies: It looks as if Zombiebaron moved the wrong thing or something. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 15:56, 30 July 2009 (UTC)

Yeah, I saw that this morning, but it looked too complicated to fix while I was still waking up, so I left it in the hope that some better admin would sort it. But I think I sorted it now, just in time to sod off home for my tea. Evening all! --UU - natter 16:11, Jul 30

RE: On pee

I moved my name back up because I was on the list of the retired, and seeing as how I am now active I figured I should move my name back up. The count you have is off, as I have at least 10 Pee Reviews that I've done (probably a few more as things got kind of messy trying to find them all). Some aren't "quality" as I did some of them before the current guidelines were in place. Boomer and I also collaborated to create RotM two long years ago if that counts for anything. Below is the list of my pees.

• Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Tarquin Middleton: My Battle with Depression.
• Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Grand Theft Auto: Stickman City
• Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/UnNews:Australia to Aborigines: 'Sorry for the killing and the stealing and stuff'
• Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/UnBooks:James Brown's Chicken Soup for the Soul
• Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Top hat
• Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Rubber Soul
• Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/User:GopherKiller/UnNews:Mexican teen learns to drive car while handcuffed
• Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Encyclopedia Dramatica
• Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/1989
• Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Mirror site

--EMC ^[TALK] 16:47, 30 July 2009 (UTC)

Stuff, some all to do with PEE

Hi UU. First of all thanks a lot for your comments regarding my PEE on the Fable article, I have since read it back and agree that I was not at my most constructive at the time. Hope the reviews aren't too bad otherwise.

My main reason for this post is not a groveling apology for doing a bad PEE, though that is implied. No, I was wanting to ask whether anyone plans to update Cajek's list in the near future, as my reviews have gone on, but I can't really tell if they are OK yet. Yes I take this far too seriously. I prefer to be able to find out whether the reviews are reasonable so I know that I can carry on reviewing and don't have to go and do apologies to all the people I may or may not have given a substandard review to. If nobody fancies updating it regularly, I could start doing it, but I thought it would be best to get your say so before doing anything like that, especially since I'm not the required PEEing rank. Thanks --ChiefjusticeDS 21:47, 30 July 2009 (UTC)

Chief - I've been checking the list for about a year and a half now, and I normally do it at weekends. I haven't needed to recently because Saber took it off my hands, but rest assured, if no-one else gets to it, I'll do my usual marathon session in the next couple of days and check the whole danged lot! --UU - natter 08:01, Jul 31

Oh god! Chief don't do it! You do not - under any circumstances - want to update that list. It's horrible torture and bad. It takes forever and you have to remember all teh little numbers and do counting and it's mind breakingly bad. It's aged UU almost 50 years already - we can't afford to lose a young uncyclopedian like yourself. It's so bad! :O    Orian57    Talk   08:05 31 July 2009

Thanks for that ringing endorsement Orian. --UU - natter 08:08, Jul 31

It's my responsibilty as a citizen to try and prevent suffering whenever I see it comming.    Orian57    Talk   08:10 31 July 2009

Thanks for steering me smoothly away from that one Orian, though it does make me feel sorry for UU. But you said the magic word, counting. I may just kill myself if I have to start doing that. By the way Orian, just to completely clog up UU's page with something irrelevant, have you taken some sort of personal responsibility of the Left 4 Dead article? As I noticed you clearing up the crap on it a couple of times in the last couple of days. Anyways thanks for clarifying UU, I can sleep much more soundly with that knowledge.--ChiefjusticeDS 08:38, 31 July 2009 (UTC)

Yes actually. What's there now, I wrote (its far far from my best but it's shit loads better than what it was). Also thanks also for your reverts on it, it's apreciated.    Orian57    Talk   08:50 31 July 2009

Oi!

I added what you said about me on the Pee Review committee page to here (check the bottom). Thank you for making me feel appreciated; I haven't felt this way since I got put in the home. I do hate it here. It smells like old people. Anywho, thanks! --EMC ^[TALK] 22:22, 30 July 2009 (UTC)

Pop a little meth in their drips, that oughtta liven things up! --UU - natter 08:08, Jul 31

Fable article

Thanks for your comments, it's a real help :) – Preceding unsigned comment added by El Cheeso (talk • contribs)

No problem - good luck! --UU - natter 08:06, Jul 31

Double Trouble Miley Ray Cyrus and Hannah Montana

Sorry for the double redirect Miley Ray Cyrus --> Miley Cyrus --> Hannah Montana. I'll try not to do that again! Miley Spears 02:43, 1 August 2009 (UTC)

I would like to apologise for Hannah Montana, Miley Ray Cyrus, and Miley Cyrus as well. Nobody should be forced to suffer through... them, her, whatever! Pup t 02:48, 1/08/2009

I'm a big fan! I think she's mega. Notice my name? Miley Spears 02:55, 1 August 2009 (UTC)

Lol, "mega" that's awsome. And really you should be less open about that sort of thing, they're all so homophobic around here.    Orian57    Talk   06:26 1 August 2009

Why don't you say mega that much Orian?? I, personally, think you should. (I should also stop forgetting to sign) --ChiefjusticeDS 06:37, 1 August 2009 (UTC)

Because I forgot it was a word, you just watch I'll say it all the time now until I forget again.    Orian57    Talk   09:34 1 August 2009

No worries. --UU - natter 08:52, Aug 1

That's a really mega idea Orian. I'm mega pleased that you have mega taken on this mega challenge to mega... nope, I tried, and I'm already sick of it. Pup t 22:56, 1/08/2009

Hah! Australia wins in the Ashes! Or so I thought....

UU, did Australia win the Ashes or not this year? I'll tell you what. If Australia wins the Ashes, you can ban me for 3 hours. If England wins the Ashes, I'm safe, and Cajek is the one who gets banned. How about that? |Si Plebius Dato' Joe ang Kemador CUN|IC Kill | 05:46, 1 August 2009 (UTC)

I have a different suggestion: how about not? The Ashes is a cricket series - five matches, each 5 days long, played over a period greater than a month. They're just into the third match now, so no-one has yet won them this year. And I'm just enjoying watching them without the bother of side bets or anything, thank you! --UU - natter 08:49, Aug 1

Maintenance Table

Can I help you with that? —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 08:41, 1 August 2009 (UTC)

Nope - partly because of the rules, partly because I got it, and partly because. Thanks for the offer, but I'm cool. --UU - natter 08:44, Aug 1

Okay. Good luck. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 08:50, 1 August 2009 (UTC)

If you're still about, you could do me a favour by sorting out the RotM - dishing out the prize, archiving and the like. --UU - natter 11:48, Aug 1

No problem. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 11:51, 1 August 2009 (UTC)

Done, I think. That "Steel Kidney" thing isn't a separate template, right? —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 12:01, 1 August 2009 (UTC)

Right. Thanks! --UU - natter 12:02, Aug 1

Also, if you're still desperate for things to do, you could integrate the view and edit links I just added to the list subpages into the tables in a pleasing fashion - I suck at wikiformatting at the best of times, and tables all but defeat me. If you don't, no biggie, just thought I'd mention it. --UU - natter 12:10, Aug 1

Only just noticed. It all looked nice, there was just a redundant linky thingy in them. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 15:29, 1 August 2009 (UTC)

The Tip, eh?

Is that so you can stock up on prams, blankets and nappies?    Orian57    Talk   15:18 1 August 2009

Just wanna mention

There's a shitload of reviews in cajek's list that need to be checked. ~~Sir Fightstar Rocks! CUN 01:40, 2 August 2009 (UTC)

And I've been checking them. In between having a real life. --UU - natter 08:01, Aug 2

At the tip! C'mon Stig, that was a good joke you can't just ignore it!    Orian57    Talk   10:11 2 August 2009

Hang on? UU is The Stig? Some say... MrN 15:02, Aug 3

That my banstick is the gear lever from an Alfa-Romeo, and even my mouse has a turbocharger? Could be... --UU - natter 20:30, Aug 3

I don't get car jokes. They're beneath me.    Orian57    Talk   21:00 3 August 2009

...

Um... Not cool. As you can see, all of my comments following that decree were regarding pie. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 14:50, 3 August 2009 (UTC)

That template was unwarranted in the first place. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 14:52, 3 August 2009 (UTC)

Dex: "votes For, Against or Pie" - that's voting pie, not commenting about it! ;-) Besides, that was also mainly for consistency, because I was banning Socky's ass for persistent commenting. And what's 5 minutes anyway?

Sock: 1. That's not your call to make. 2. Yes it was - your multiple comments on that vote page are bordering on the ridiculous and the pathetic. Let people make up their own minds and leave them to it. 3. You caught me in a bad mood today. Perhaps if you danced for me it would help. --UU - natter 14:55, Aug 3

That's 5 minutes of an unwarranted ban. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 14:56, 3 August 2009 (UTC)

*dances like a little monkey* —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 14:57, 3 August 2009 (UTC)

Now seriously, I made a lot of comments, but only one of that was slightly close to making drama. And for the rest maybe one or two comments where I might have tried to convince an against-voter to reconsider their vote. Whatever the case though, I think a template that forbids any commenting at all is a bit too harsh. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 15:04, 3 August 2009 (UTC)

It is rare that VFH votes require any commenting. A page where every single vote has at least one comment against it is annoying in the extreme. Just leave it. --UU - natter 15:17, Aug 3

Fine. Fine. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 15:30, 3 August 2009 (UTC)

I'm Intrigued

Is it just me or does the sign saying "No Whoring On My Talk Page" at the top of your talk page keep changing colour? Not that I was going to whore, but I swear it was red, and then orange and then green each time I visit it. What is going on!?! Nameable • mumble? • (UnScr:PWotM) 15:11, 3 August 2009 (UTC)

And yes, I have just been leaving your talk page and then returning to it just to see if it changes colour again. Nameable • mumble? • (UnScr:PWotM) 15:11, 3 August 2009 (UTC)

Ah, the miracle of <choose><option></option></choose>. --UU - natter 15:15, Aug 3

I even remember when - and why - you started that.    Orian57    Talk   20:24 3 August 2009

No.

"are you still whingeing about that?"

I'm whining because you fail at spelling. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 15:31, 3 August 2009 (UTC)

How, exactly? --UU - natter 15:35, Aug 3

Don't believe dictionaries. They lie. MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 15:37, 3 August 2009 (UTC)

"1 Sexy Stomach Rule: Obey" Now that's a good one. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 15:39, 3 August 2009 (UTC)

Triple Entendre

Hey UU.

I just came across this one on the PEE queue, and was of the opinion that it was a waste of time. However, Acrolo put this one in, and I thought that, since he is an established user and all I would consult you as to it's suitability before tearing a strip off him. I am also at a loss as to whether we should review or not generally, I personally cannot think of anything to say, and it can't be ranked in most of the categories. Here is the link, oh and could you shove a decision onto that page, as I added a message asking people not to review until you made a decision as to the articles suitability. Thanks. --ChiefjusticeDS 21:19, 3 August 2009 (UTC)

Since it's basically mine too, I beg you to at least look it over and think about how this could be made in a nice enjoyable article. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 21:23, 3 August 2009 (UTC)

Well, it's been deleted now. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 07:19, 4 August 2009 (UTC)

I'm sorry, but I simply could not stand it. An injoke every once in a while is okay, as is a VFH joke nomination, but this stretched the Lady GaGa joke 10 lengths too far. First of all, that isn't even a triple entendre. Second of all, it was originally passable as a VFH/VFP/whatever nomination because, well, it was a community injoke that wasn't in the mainspace. That, combined with the entire tiredness of the joke itself, took it over the edge, and I deleted it on my own volition. Hope that clears things up. -- T​K​F​​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​UU​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​CK 07:27, 4 August 2009 (UTC)

No problem. I actually quite agree with you. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 07:31, 4 August 2009 (UTC)

TKF: if you hadn't deleted it, I would have, I so totally agree with you. Chief: I'd have deleted the review request as well, TBH. Still, that's the way the world works. --UU - natter 08:17, Aug 4

UnSignpost: July 30th, 2009

The Uncyclopedia UnSignpost

Telling You Stuff You Already Knew, But With Different Words!

July 30th, 2009• Issue 58• Now Delivered Trendily Late!

Uncyclopedia Users Alter Time Itself By The Woodburninator This week: an update. As previously reported in an earlier news story, one month ago several well-known contributors went on a campaign to try and delete time itself. It is said they were trying to bring about an end to unfunniness throughout history, with the slight side effect of non-existence. But just as it looked as if their plan would come to fruition, cooler heads prevailed and stopped everything in its tracks. Since then, the plan has changed. Instead of deleting all that ever was, the users have decided it would be much more prudent to just change all of history to their liking. Several users have been seen spending their free time on User:Gwax/Timeline rebuild, in some cases changing events one year at a time, and in others trying to change entire millennia. How they are able to do this, no one is sure, though rumors of a DeLorean DMC-12 have been circulating. The outcomes of the project have, thus far, been very good for us for everyone. There was one unfortunate incident when a user tried to give his parents millions of dollars before he was born, but the extra money forced them to separate before he was conceived. All of a sudden he didn't exist, but then if he didn't exist, how could he have gone back in time to change anything? It caused a huge rift in space/time, a bit of a bother really. But we're happy to report that everything has been sorted out with no casualties only one casualty! Remarks from the community on the process have been nothing but positive. "In order to walk the road of peace, we need to climb the mountain of conflict," notable scholar TKF exclusively commented. We have our entire staff working around the clock to figure out what this means as we speak. Town drunk Dexter111344 was also heard mumbling about the subject. He blamed wizards for the whole thing, before stumbling away, probably to make more links to A wizard did it. Regardless, whether its wizards or time machines, the editing of the past continues as we speak, and will continue until all of history has been changed. Or until we get bored and move onto something else. Uncyclopedia Editors Conflicted Over Story Topic By Gerrycheevers Owing to the large amount of things happening in the last week, and also to the fact that this issue is unforgivably late, the editors of the UnSignpost were unable to settle on a single topic for the second story of this week's edition. The editors were also unable to agree on either two topics for a rare three-story issue or how many UnSignpost editors it takes to screw in a lightbulb (the UnSignpost staff has been left to ponder this question in the dark). As a decision could not be reached, it was decided after much deliberation and petty arguing that all of the candidate stories be mentioned rapid-fire in a single story, so as to confuse and irritate the reader and cause him to be required to navigate back to this issue to click on all of the links. These stories are as follows: Zombiebaron returns and petitions to end voting. His effort is parodied, rebutted, and parodied again. A link to Requested Articles is placed on the sidebar and MadMax commences handing out badges to requested article creators. Zombiebaron returns again to demand reskins, which we understand means he needs to replace all of his undead flesh with "fresh flesh". Cajek returns, but not really. VFH maxes out at 23 nominations at press time, including some discussion-inducing selections. More events certainly occured, but we can't be arsed to list everything for you.

Check out these pages! UN:REQ Gone Wilde! All the Greatest Music of the 80s, on Three Great Cassettes! Whose Sandwich? From our logs: 14:47, 26 July 2009 Modusoperandi (Talk | contribs) blocked Modusoperandi (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 8 hours ‎(I banned a guy for too long this one time. Then I had nachos.) 20:40, 29 July 2009 MrN9000 (Talk | contribs) blocked MadMax (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 1 Minute (Constantly littering recent changes with thousands of really useful edits.) 20:45, 29 July 2009 Mordillo (Talk | contribs) blocked MrN9000 (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 3 minutes ‎(Not having enough tits.) 15:17, 30 July 2009 Under user (Talk | contribs) blocked 122.173.57.31 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 day ‎(blanking? why not just wear a t-shirt proudly declaiming "I have no life"? it has much the same effect, but you might get away with claiming it's ironic...) Biopic of the Week Touching down on the Uncyclopedia runway in December '08, Saberwolf116 has quickly become one of the all-time great Pee Reviewers. With 86 of them under his belt, Saber has recently ridden off into a yellow sunset to pursue some sort of education, or something along those lines that will detract from his Uncyclopedia-ing. Return soon, fair Saberwolf! Old-School Featured Article of the Week Bold Speech to text software bold is the most wide Lee used applicate shin by lacy people who can knot be bother to type. It's bark tech know lodge-y has vast Lee bark improve in Reese cent years. Bark bark it is not recommend Ed bark four use in bark off is spaces bark with noisy bark dogs. Diabolical Plan to Overtake the Wiki of the Week It seems that UnSignpost co-chief editor Under user has recently succeeded in the first stages of producing a sewer-dwelling offspring (pictured). Rumors of UU using the as-yet-unnamed biological sockpuppet for activities of questionable morality are unconfirmed. Congratulations, UU! Reader Poll Results Last week we asked loyal UnSignpost readers to weigh in on the immensely interesting issue of formatting. There was no clear consensus on the subject, as it seems Uncyclopedians employ the full range of screen resolutions, and as such it's a wonder anyone can read the UnSignpost at all. The most telling aspect of the poll was its response rate, indicating that a full eight people read the UnSignpost.

UnSignpost Main Page • Contact the Editors • Sign Up for Delivery • Get the Userbox

It's on time, you were just high and didn't realize when it got here! THEDUDEBOT Armed and Ready Say The Word 03:27, 4 August 2009 (UTC)

Hi

Our article titled "Neeyum Paithiyam Nannum Paithiyam" has just recently been deleted. Can you quite possibly give us a copy of the content at least as it was the beginning of a short film we wanted to make and it would be really really great if you can kindly sent me a copy of the article to srabirami@hotmail.com. Cheers! this is the link to tat page btw: http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/Neeyum_Paithiyam_Nannum_Paithiyam

Thanks a lot! :D – Preceding unsigned comment added by 58.96.76.13 (talk • contribs)

Hum. OK, point 1: I wasn't ignoring this request, I just get a lot of traffic on this page, so I only notice if new stuff is added at the bottom as it says in the header there. Point 2: I really don't fancy emailing someone I don't know who left their address on my page, I'm afraid. If you're keeping an eye on this page, get an account and leave a message here with your new username. I'll restore the page to your userspace and you can do with it as you will. Alternatively, if any of the reprobates who frequent this page are less paranoid about their emails, I'll restore it to their userspace, and they can email it to you. Volunteers? --UU - natter 09:42, Aug 4

Sod it, restored to the userspace of the account that edited it. --UU - natter 10:04, Aug 4