Uncyclopedia:Poo Lit Surprise/archive2

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'1st page of archives (oldest PLS competitions) | '3rd page of archives (older PLS competitions)


January-February 2008

Winners

Best Article

Poo Lit Surprise Logo.png Grand Champion: Marie Curie by An Ape that Only Exists on Thursdays

1st runner up: The Baker's Dozen by Modusoperandi

2nd runner up: If you loved THAT, you’ll love THIS by Mhaille

Honorable Mentions: Selective Inbreeding, Harry Hill

Best Noob Article

Poo Lit Surprise Logo.png Grand Champion: UnBooks:Life as a 4⅝ Year Old by DJ Irreverent

1st runner up: HowTo:Create a Commercially Successful Indie Band by Fag

2nd runner up: The Roman Gods by Mou

Honorable Mentions: Why?:You Shouldn't Read Books, Peptojizmol, Concentration Sixy-four, Mousse

Best Alt. Namespace Article

Poo Lit Surprise Logo.png Grand Champion: Why?:Get a tattoo of a tarantula on your face by Modusoperandi

1st runner up: UnBooks:Evelyn, the Modified Dog by Thekillerfroggy and UnBooks:The Judge Sentenced Me To Write This Fucking Book by Zombiebaron (tie)

2nd runner up: UnScripts:The JFK Shootout of 1963 by Shandon

Honorable Mentions: UnScripts:Death of a Script Monkey, HowTo:Fix a Guitar

Best Illustrated Article

Poo Lit Surprise Logo.png Grand Champion: Segue: a monologue by Modusoperandi

1st runner up: UnBooks:The True Story of: Jimmy and the aliens; based on a true story by Zombiebaron

2nd runner up: Horatio Hornblower by Mhaille

Honorable Mentions: Übermensch, Crank that (Soulja Boy)

Best Rewrite

Poo Lit Surprise Logo.png Grand Champion: Dude by THEDUDEMAN

1st runner up: Paris Hilton by 15Mickey20

2nd runner up: Girls Gone Wilde by Zombiebaron

Honorable Mentions: Angry German Kid, Synchronized Car Bombing

Competition Wrap-Up

Congratulations to Uncyclopedia on having the lowest PLS turn-out yet!

Our results and scores are still being figured out for one category. Despite this, all five winners will still get their promised grand prize of the Poet Lowrate template on their userpage and $20. In order to claim this prize, email our good friend and benefactor Sannse for the details. Congratulations to these people, and to the runner-ups, and to everyone who entered. All who entered can move their articles to the mainspace now.

Thank you to all the competitors, thank you to all of the judges, thanks to Sannse for personally ponying up and providing us the bling, and thanks to יהוה who really made all of this possible. It has been a pleasure being your PLS organizer. EMC [TALK]

Scoring Details

The scoring system was based on a points. Judges were asked to submit their top 5, points being awarded as: 5 points for #1, 4 points for #2, 3 points for #3, and so on. Total scores are below. Entries not below received no points, though they were judged. Consult any of the judges for questions.

Best Article


  1. Marie Curie – 14
  2. The Baker's Dozen – 12
  3. If you loved THAT, you’ll love THIS – 10
  4. Selective Inbreeding – 6
  5. Harry Hill – 3

Best Noob Article


  1. UnBooks:Life as a 4⅝ Year Old – 15
  2. HowTo:Create a Commercially Successful Indie Band – 12
  3. The Roman Gods – 9
  4. Peptojizmol – 3
  5. Why?:You Shouldn't Read Books – 2
  6. Concentration Sixy-four – 1
  7. Mousse - 1

Best Alt. Namespace Article


  1. Why?:Get a tattoo of a tarantula on your face – 13
  2. UnBooks:Evelyn, the Modified Dog – 10
  3. UnBooks:The Judge Sentenced Me To Write This Fucking Book – 10
  4. UnScripts:The JFK Shootout of 1963 – 9
  5. UnScripts:Death of a Script Monkey – 2
  6. HowTo:Fix a Guitar - 1

Best Illustrated


  1. Segue: a monologue – 15
  2. UnBooks:The True Story of: Jimmy and the aliens; based on a true story – 10
  3. Horatio Hornblower – 9
  4. Übermensch – 8
  5. Crank that (Soulja Boy) – 3

Best Rewrite


  1. Dude – 15
  2. Paris Hilton – 12
  3. Girls Gone Wilde – 9
  4. Angry German Kid – 6
  5. Synchronized Car Bombing – 3

July-August 2008

Winners

Best Article

Poo Lit Surprise Logo.png Grand Champion: The Gathering Horror by Cap'n Ben

1st runner up: Getting pushed into bananas (Mario Kart) by Mrthejazz

2nd runner up: Interpretive Death by The Thinker

Honorable Mentions: Gemini, Observational Comedy, Pulitzer Prize, Epic poetry, Physics Act of 1707

Best Noob Article

Poo Lit Surprise Logo.png Grand Champion: Sweatshop (humanitarian institution) by ShuaDaddy

1st runner up: Pontius Pilates by Hyperbole

2nd runner up: Tom O'Dell by Cheapinitreal

Honorable Mentions: Adjustable gastric band AKA lap band, Prerecorded Friends

Best Alt. Namespace Article

Poo Lit Surprise Logo.png Grand Champion: UnTunes:White trash girl by Modusoperandi

1st runner up: How To:Survive a Japanese Game Show by Mhaille

2nd runner up: Polar Express by Cajek

Honorable Mentions: HowTo:Be a surfer, UnPoetia:T.S. Elliot Is Dead, UnBooks: Lyle Crump's Guide to starting secondary school

Best Illustrated Article

Poo Lit Surprise Logo.png Grand Champion: The Incredible Adventures of MS PAINTMAN! by The UnIdiot

1st runner up: 11-Wide by RAHB

2nd runner up: Sausage party by Zombiebaron

Honorable Mentions: UnBooks:Where's the White House?, RoxNews

Best Rewrite

Poo Lit Surprise Logo.png Grand Champion: Sania Mirza by 15Mickey20

1st runner up: HowTo:Be A Supervillain by Under user

2nd runner up: Driving in Bucharest by Heerenveen and Rock lobster by Hyperbole

Honorable Mentions: Mini, Heath Ledger, BBC


Competition Wrap-Up

Oh, I'm supposed to write here, am I? I probably should do that then.

Despite some minor difficulties, including Zombiebaron opening the PLS without confirming we had prize money, Zombiebaron locking the entries too early, Zombiebaron setting the wrong unlock time for the entries, plus a few last-minute scrambles, a bit of controversy over judges entering, the total absence of e|m|c, and a rather embarrassing incident involving an enormous clam and a bit too much to drink, the PLS went off well.

I say that having absolutely no idea what the other PLS competitions were like, but still.

It looks like, yes, you will get prize money, so send your postal addresses to community@wikia.com. If you are homeless, consider yourself out of luck.

Thank you to all who entered, all who helped out, and also Zombiebaron.  Sir Skullthumper, MD (criticize  writings  critchat) 00:19 Aug 14, 2008

Scoring Details

The scoring system was based on a points. Judges were asked to submit their top 5, points being awarded as: 5 points for #1, 4 points for #2, 3 points for #3, and so on. Total scores are below. Entries not below received no points, though they were judged. Consult any of the judges for questions.

Best Article


  1. The Gathering Horror - 13
  2. Getting pushed into bananas (Mario Kart) - 10
  3. Interpretive Death - 9
  4. Gemini - 5
  5. Observational Comedy, Pulitzer Prize - 3
  6. Epic poetry, Physics Act of 1707 - 1

Best Noob Article


  1. Sweatshop (humanitarian institution) - 14
  2. Pontius Pilates - 13
  3. Tom O'Dell - 9
  4. Adjustable gastric band AKA lap band - 5
  5. Prerecorded Friends - 4

Best Alt. Namespace Article


  1. UnTunes:White trash girl - 14
  2. How To:Survive a Japanese Game Show - 12
  3. Polar Express - 8
  4. HowTo:Be a surfer, UnPoetia:T.S. Elliot Is Dead - 3
  5. UnBooks: Lyle Crump's Guide to starting secondary school - 1

Best Illustrated


  1. The Incredible Adventures of MS PAINTMAN! - 15
  2. 11-Wide - 11
  3. Sausage party - 10
  4. UnBooks:Where's the White House? - 5
  5. RoxNews - 1

Best Rewrite


  1. Sania Mirza - 13
  2. HowTo:Be A Supervillain - 11
  3. Driving in Bucharest, Rock lobster - 5
  4. Mini - 4
  5. Heath Ledger - 2
  6. BBC - 1

February-March 2009

Welcome to the 7th Edition of our beloved and prestigious Poo Lit Surprise. Watch your step.
The contest is over and the results are below. Consult the talk page or me for any questions or concerns. See the Poo Lit Archives for the results from past competitions.

Winners

Best Article

Poo Lit Surprise Logo.png Grand Champion: Plink by GlobalTourniquet

1st runner up: Childhood: an essay by Modusoperandi

2nd runner up: The Watch Men by Composure1

Honorable Mentions: Dungeons & Dragons: Real Life Edition: Character Races, Godzilla vs. Vaginus

Best Noob Article

Poo Lit Surprise Logo.png Grand Champion: UN Fat Project by Judepeer

1st runner up: Alfred Hitchcock by GlobalTourniquet and Dungeons & Dragons: Real Life Edition: Character Classes by Guildensternenstein (tie)

2nd runner up: My Girl's Best Friend by Tagstit

Honorable Mention: Thin Mints

Best Alt. Namespace Article

Poo Lit Surprise Logo.png Grand Champion: UnMovie Review: Watchmen (with special guests, the Watchmen) by Modusoperandi and UnNews:Obama unveils education reform plans by Monika (tie)

1st runner up: HowTo:Write Serj Tankian Lyrics by GlobalTourniquet and Why?:Be a transvestite if you're not going to put any effort into it? by DrStrange (tie)

Best Illustrated Article

Poo Lit Surprise Logo.png Grand Champion: Economic Collapse Barbie® by DrStrange and Karl Lagerfeld by Modusoperandi (tie)

1st runner up: Eadweard Muybridge, Zoopraxographer by Mhaille

Best Rewrite

Poo Lit Surprise Logo.png Grand Champion: Money by Sycamore

1st runner up: Claude Debussy by 15Mickey20

2nd runner up: Oscars by GlobalTourniquet

Honorable Mentions: L, HowTo:Online Jihad

Competition Wrap-Up

And so ends another chapter in the history of the Poo Lit Surprise.

There's been some times where I wish I wasn't hosting this, but overall, it's gone better than I thought it would. The rough patches, I believe, are more than worth it for some of the new, terrific article that have been written. Congratulations to all the winners for an excellent display of writing. A hearty pat on the back to everyone else who entered, too — it's nice to have so many good writers around, so thanks for all the effort you guys have put in, especially those who wrote multiple articles.

Special thanks to Modus, for answering those questions while I wasn't there/didn't watchlist this thing, all the judges for their time spent deciding who would be victorious, and to Mordillo and MrN for doing all the adminny stuff that I couldn't.

If anyone has any complaints about my lousy maths skills (and mistakes do happen. Often.), please feel free to moan on my talk page.

Well done all again, good luck with these on VFH, and thanks for making this the not-the-worst PLS in Uncyc history![citation needed] —–Sir Heerenveen, KUN UotM RotM VFH (talk), 6/04 10:51

Scoring Details

The scoring system was based on a points. Judges were asked to submit their top 5, points being awarded as: 5 points for #1, 4 points for #2, 3 points for #3, and so on. Total scores are below. Entries not below received no points, though they were judged. Consult any of the judges for questions.

Best Article


  1. User:GlobalTourniquet/Plink - 12
  2. User:Modusoperandi/Childhood: an essay - 10
  3. User:Composure1/The Watch Men - 8
  4. User:Guildensternenstein/Dungeons & Dragons: Real Life Edition: Character Races - 7
  5. User:DrStrange/Godzilla vs. Vaginus - 6
  6. User:Nickwalnut/Paedometer - 2
  7. User:Mrthejazz/Charles Lindenburg - 1

Best Noob Article


  1. User:Judepeer/UN Fat Project - 12
  2. User:Guildensternenstein/Dungeons & Dragons: Real Life Edition: Character Classes - 11
  3. User:GlobalTourniquet/Alfred Hitchcock - 11
  4. User:Tagstit/My Girl's Best Friend - 7
  5. User:CheddarBBQ/Thin Mints - 3
  6. User:Mahm00shA/Nile (band) - 1

Best Alt. Namespace Article


  1. User:Monika/UnNews:Obama unveils education reform plans - 12
  2. User:Modusoperandi/UnMovie_Review: Watchmen (with special guests, the Watchmen) - 12
  3. User:DrStrange/Why?:Be a transvestite if you're not going to put any effort into it? - 9
  4. User:GlobalTourniquet/HowTo:Write Serj Tankian Lyrics - 9
  5. User:So So/poetry and jap chicks archive - 1

Best Illustrated


  1. User:DrStrange/Economic Collapse Barbie® - 14
  2. User:Modusoperandi/Karl Lagerfeld - 14
  3. User:Mhaille/Eadweard Muybridge, Zoopraxographer - 9

Best Rewrite


  1. User:Sycamore/Money - 14
  2. User:15Mickey20/Claude Debussy - 11
  3. User:GlobalTourniquet/Oscars - 8
  4. User:Sonic80/HowTo:Online Jihad - 6
  5. User:Zheliel/L - 6

October 2009

Winners

Best Article

Poo Lit Surprise Logo.png Grand Champion: Elizabeth I by 15Mickey20

1st runner up: The History of the Decline and Fall of Uncyclopedia by Mhaille

2nd runner up: MonsterQuest by Guildensternenstein

Honorable Mention: User:DrStrange/RedHerring

Best Noob Article

Poo Lit Surprise Logo.png Grand Champion: Rules of baseball by SPIKE

1st runner up: UnNews: Meteor shaped like Simon Cowell's head on collision course with Earth by Padimir Padoffski

2nd runner up: Military Action by Hydronium Ion

Best Alt. Namespace Article

Poo Lit Surprise Logo.png Grand Champion: UnNews:Australia says "You just don't understand our humour!" by PuppyOnTheRadio

1st runner up: Insipid Sentimental Women's Novel by Guildensternenstein

2nd runner up: UnRadio:Tricia Bellerose on Pirate FM by Orian57

Honorable Mention: User:Necropaxx/HowTo:Fish<

Best Illustrated Article

Poo Lit Surprise Logo.png Grand Champion: Bi-curious_George by Mhaille

1st runner up: User:Monika/The Prisoner (US Remake) by Monika

2nd runner up: Microsoft_Knowledge_Base by PuppyOnTheRadio

Best Rewrite

Poo Lit Surprise Logo.png Grand Champion: Abraham Lincoln by Gerrycheevers

1st runner up: FORTRAN by SPIKE and Manowar by Mahm00shA (tie)

2nd runner up: ...*cough*...

Scoring Details

The scoring system was based on colour, consistency and flavour, here


May 2013

Results

Detailed score results can be found here. Scores calculated with only a 45% margin of error.

Best Article

Poo Lit Surprise Logo.png Grand Champion: The Uncyclopedia Owner's Manual by Zombiebaron

runner up: UnScripts:The Treaty of Minaj-Black by IFYMB!

Best Noob Article

Poo Lit Surprise Logo.png Grand Champion: My Dinner by RedHot

runners up: Hold Your Wii For A Wee contest by TheMillionRabbit and Searching for Topological Degeneracy in the Hubbard Model with Quantum Monte Carlo by Tmchale

Best Rewrite

Poo Lit Surprise Logo.png Grand Champion: Disturbed by Zana Dark

runners up: Ludwig Wittgenstein by Tmchale and Opposite Day by IFYMB!

Best Potatochop

Poo Lit Surprise Logo.png Grand Champion: The Last Unicorn in Vinnitsa, oil on wet canvas, by Zombiebaron

runner up: Ghost in The Trench by Dexter111344

Best T-Shirt Designs

Summer 2020

Winners

Full scores and voting available here.

Best Article

Poo Lit Surprise Logo.png Grand Champion: Black Lives Matter by Leverage

2nd Place: COVID-19 Solutions Incorporated by Shabidoo

Best Noob Article

Poo Lit Surprise Logo.png Grand Champion: 12 oz Mouse by Hazy

Best Collaboration

Poo Lit Surprise Logo.png Grand Champions: Vandalized Oscar Wilde Statue by Zombiebaron and Kippy

Best Rewrite

Poo Lit Surprise Logo.png Grand Champion: Five-second rule by MrX

2nd Place: puckerbut by Shabidoo

Best Potatochop

Poo Lit Surprise Logo.png Grand Champion: Penis Mask by Zombiebaron

2nd Place: Omega Garfield by Hazy

Best T-Shirt Design

Poo Lit Surprise Logo.png Grand Champion: College Buddies Uncyclopedia by Nicolassequeira

2nd Place: Content Free Forever by Zombiebaron