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Ev'nin' Guvnor, cast yer mincepies at Uncyclopædia Britannica, the content-free encyclopedia that any Tom, Dick or 'Arry can edit. Northern translation:Ey up luv! Get yers arse on t' Uncyclopedia, before Tom, Dick or Arry do or ye gunner get a thrapin'! Good Queen Bess has inspired us to work on 30,826 articles since opening in January 2005. Jolly well, old chaps. Before editing, please read the Beginner's Guide and browse the Big Five, if you will. Colonisations for the week include Canada, Newfoundland, Australia and New Zealand. Rule Britannia! Politics | Games | Computers | People | Quaint | Coherent Most Popular | Alphabetical Index | Other Categories...

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On the telly tonight Come here little grandson, and pull up a chair, ol' grandpa has to say something to you. What story am I going to be telling this time? Hah ha, no story tonight, Jimmy, I'm going to lecture you on something very important. It's time to learn about a little subject called filial piety. Don't start fussing now, it's a very important subject to learn about when squirts like you start to grow up. I was just about to get into that, Jimmy. Filial piety is a simple enough concept, often embraced by popular religions such as Confucianism and Christianity. Now, you're Christian but you don't know what filial piety is, right? That's because the heads of your religion decided to muck up the phrase and replace it with a simplistic platitude such as "love your mom and pop". But I digress, I'll talk to you about religion some other day. (Full article...) Recently featured: Jew Jaws did WTC EU Archive · Vote for featured articles · You can vote for your favourite Pop Idol to be featured. More of the best of Uncyclopedia Britannica Download article feed plugin for Google Desktop edit Lest we forget June 17: Presidential Mullet Day (U.S.) 1878 - Mount Everest built by Nepal to encourage tourism growth, and annoy Tibet. 1885 - An immigrant from France, the Statue of Liberty arrives in New York Harbor and lands a job as an oversized greeter. 1980 - Regicide is all the rage, until the local king bans it. Prude. 1992 - Lieutenant Planet is promoted to Captain Planet. 1994 - OJ Simpson, football legend and innocent man, is chased through the streets of LA in a show of overreach and incompetence by the LAPD. 1995 - Activists raid a waffle mill and manage to set thousands of waffles bred in captivity free onto the streets of Chicago. 2001 - After years of disappointing sales of Regular K, Kellogg's releases Special K to huge success. Ye Royal Archives	Paddington Blair's word for today is [[ flight]] Try to use it in your conversations. Knowledge is power.
	edit Auntie Beeb reports: You were saying, Dick? Trump eloquently refutes allegations of extraterrestrial control of US elections John Dowd issues statement in Comic Sans NASA to select authentic Apollo Moon Rock for one-way lunar voyage Nixon: I am a crook. No, wait. (Pictured) UnNews editorial note: Logo handling is fixed The Cure's Robert Smith to pay off student debt We've been spelling Joe Biden's name wrong for 12 years Mr ratburn is GAY The Big Bang Theory renewed for 1021 more seasons Obama buys Pornhub More Current Events at Beeb News edit Did you chaps know... ... that genocide is a perfectly healthy response to any personal problems you may have? Do you blimey care... ... that abstinence is only 99.999% effective? Care to read more?
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United Empire Loyalist of the Month Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome! So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore. Let us all clap for him because I said so. Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage! Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls. Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

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