UnNews:New writing technique good for some, bad for others

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search

UnNews Logo Potato.png

This atrcile is prat of UnNwes, yuor suocre for up-to-the-mnitue mifsinromtaoin.

21 Agusut 2007

Raod cerws are arleday prtactcinig the tchenquie.

Cmarbdige, Mssauhcasttses--Rcenet Hvarrad Untivresiy sutdeis have swohn that the Egnislh lgnaguae is rdealbe eevn when it is tlotaly fckued up. This cluod be a rselut of the way Esngilh is raed, bcsueae ntavie sepkaers olny raed the frist and last ltteers of a wordw, and knid of hlaf-ass the rset. Or mybae its bsceaue ploepe who spaek Ensgilh are spuer asewmoe. Rgerdaelss, adiotdianl sudties point to a ternd of ynuog pelope who cnosdeir this pnhemomonen to be 'wckied fckunig cool.'

Nwes of this weird dvleoepnemt cusead great hpapnises anomg tohse who rlleay, rlaely scuk at snlelpig. Tehse idnviudlas can now ferely mses with the lerttes in the mddlie of any wordw whtiuot faer of bnieg rdiiclued for tiehr low itnlelingce and poor derss sneeze. Snice fgirunig out the frist and last ltteres in a wordw is so mcuh esaeir than mthedos of fnidnig the crrocet sllinpeg (scuh as dcioitnraeis or bneig samrt), epxtres thoezire that the agverae IQ of Einlgsh sekpanig cmmonutieis may icnrseae up to fiteefn piotns. This wlil ovbouisly laed to smiplfictiaon of the msot poitnlssely cmpeolx lnagauge known to man. Aonnynig sllpeing rlues wlil no lngoer be piansktanigly mimeorzied by shcoolchldiren. One emxalpe wuold be the rlue "I before E except after C" bineg rpleaced with "I bfoere E? Who fckuing craes?"

The aevrgae dxysleic. Waht an ahssohle.

One gruop who did not shrae in the gneeral mood uspwnig brghuot aoubt by tihs rveleatoin wree the dxyslecis. Uopn raeidng the nwes realsee and a smpale of the new wrtniig, one dxysleic was haerd to rmeark "I still can't fucking read it!" Tihs may be due to the fcat taht dlysxeics see wrods bckawrads, tuhs ngeatnig the ecffet of mxniig the ltteres up rnadmoly. Or it cluod be due to the fcat taht dlsxyeics are anttetoin skeeing ahssloes who pertned to not be albe to raed so taht smoneoe wlil hug tehm. Bsatrads. In any csae, aiddtoinal resraech was prefromed in wihch the ltteres of the wrods wree mxied up, but the frist and lsat lerttes wree stwiched, hpoing to enbale the dlisexyc conmmuntiy to be albe to raed porprely. Hwoever, all of the tset sbujctes flaied to dcheiper the new txet, ctinig raesnos scuh as "The font hurt my eyes" and "Maybe I'm just retarded." At perss tmie, epxrets wree laening twrodas the scenod ecxsue.

One ntobale stebcak of this tehcnquie is that, smiliar to my ex-wfie, it rfeuses to prefrom oarlly. Amttepts to use this new wrtinig mtheod out luod in cnovrestaoin wree met with cnofsuioin and anegr. Sverael pepole wree artesred in dwontwon Bsoton for spusicoin of benig idoits. Hwoever msot pelope amttetpnig to tlak with olny the frist and last ltteres in their ogrinial psoitoins smpily received cuotnless drity lkoos, snice people ovrehaernig this incorheent gbbireish aussmed that they wree spaeknig Frnech.

This atrclie faetrues frist-hnad juonrlasim by an UnNwes mbemer. See the tlak pgae for mroe dtelias.

This article was featured on 7 September 2007. Click here to see the featured version.


Potatohead aqua.png Fueteard Aicrtle  (read another featured article) Freatued vsieron: 7 September 2007
This arlcite has been futeerad on the fornt pgae. — You can vtoe for or nmaotine your firvatuoe acrlectis at Uyiclnocdpea:VFH.
Template:FA/07 September 2007Template:FA/2007Template:FQ/07 September 2007Template:FQ/2007