User:TheLick/Main Page

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
< User:TheLick(Redirected from User:TheLick)
Jump to navigation Jump to search
Welcome to Uncyclopedia,
The content-free encyclopedia anyone can edit
40,299 articles in English

Today's featured article

UnBooksDaddytheresazombieinthegarden.jpg

I looked up at the sky and saw the sun trying to squeeze through the grey clouds. Fantastic. The weather stays like this Emily won’t want to go to the park and I can have a wank in the shower. Should really do something with this shitty garden as well. Look like a fucking tink – that old fridge really has to go. I was just about to open the door when Emily ran out with her skipping rope.

“Hiya Daddy!” she said as she ran past and began to skip.

“Hey Ems, what have you been up to recently?” ‘What have you been up to recently?’ she’s not a second-cousin and you only saw her this morning, she’s not going to have written a fucking thesis or anything of any significance – oh shit, now I missed what she said. “That’s great honey. I’m just gonna go inside and see what Charley’s been up to, recently.” Might as well be consistently moronic.

“Charley went out. He said he had to get some gear from his friend who was at the shops. I told him that we need milk too.” (Full article...)

Did you know?

Cafeteria.jpg
  • ... that 5/3 people cannot do fractions?
  • ... that babies explode when you put them in the microwave?
  • ...that contrary to popular belief, the emoticon ":3" is a depiction of someone with a scrotum for a mouth?
  • ... that en passant is actually French for "inventing new rules as you go along?"
  • ... that the Welsh language was created when someone fell asleep on a keyboard?
  • ... that ten out of ten cigarette manufacturers agree that Cancer is great?
  • ... that condoms prevent many sexually transmitted diseases, and at least one erection? Sorry Candace...

In the news

Obama tough.png
Boxer shorts, like a real man. And Bruce Lee black pants.

Ongoing: The wait for GTA VI, Silksong, TAWOG, Stranger Things 5, and Spaceballs 2 • Russian Invasion • Gaza War • Trump and Elon's feud.. make up.. no one knows anymore • Animal-related live-action remakes kicking Snow White's ass • Jaws 50th anniversary • Colorado Rockies game replacing Jaws airing • Israel/Iran "peace talks" • Pittsburgh Steelers adding old players way past their prime • Rock drummer exodus (not to be confused with Tom Hunting or Zbigniew Fyk)

Recent deaths: Ariana Grande's Nonna • Canadian team's bid to win the Stanley Cup, again • PF4Eva's headphone cable • Jimmy Swaggart • Diddy's freedom for only 20 years • Michael Madsen • Diogo Jota • Texas flood victims • LA ICE raids

Upcoming deaths: DEI • Tom Cruise's career of sprinting on-screen • Pittsburgh Steelers' locker room • Greta Thunberg? • R. Kelly • Iran's nuclear program • Oil prices • Dumbasses with fireworks in their backyards • Diddy's bank account after incoming lawsuits • The asshats who spoiled Squid Game • MAGA

On this day

"The dragon clearly represents Man's insatiable greed for

July 15: Throw Your Controller at the Screen Day

  • 1982 - Atari releases E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial for the Atari 2600, and is met with rave reviews and general praise from gamers and critics alike.
  • 1986 - Dragon Warrior (Pictured) is released for the Nintendo Entertainment System, paving the way for role-playing video games.
  • 1987 - The most angry singer in the world was born in Las Vegas, Nevada. First thing he did in his life was to throw his NES controller in the TV.
  • 1988 - The first adult-oriented video game is released for the Nintendo Entertainment System, but the inadequate processors and primitive graphics of the time render the game more confusing than erotic.
  • 1997 - GoldenEye 007 is released for the Nintendo 64, panned by critics due to lack of achievements and customizable hats.
  • 2002 - Playing off the massive success of The Lord of the Rings franchise, a videogame based on The Silmarillion is developed, where you play the role of someone trying to read The Silmarillion.

Picture of the day

MS Paint screenshot
 A screenshot of MS Paint, an image manipulation program.

Image credit: Nonymous
View image · Nominate new image · View all featured images

Other areas of Uncyclopedia

Sister projects

Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects as well as some foreign language Uncyclopedias and Illogicopedia.

Foreign languages

This Uncyclopedia is written in English, supposedly. Started in 2005, it currently contains 40,299 articles. Many other parody wikis are available; some of the lamest are listed below.

Retrieved from "https://en.uncyclopedia.co/w/index.php?title=User:TheLick/Main_Page&oldid=5949453"