User:TheLick/Main Page

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Today's featured article

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Are you the kind of person who is interested in telling other people what to do? Easily swayed by religious texts? Have an itchy trigger finger and a fondness for big red buttons? Do you have a pulse? If you answered yes to any of these questions then you might be the kind of person who'd enjoy being President of the United States! It's true, just about anybody can be President. The guy pictured on the right is no more qualified than your milkman or some random guy on the street, yet he made it to President and is having the time of his life. That could be you! Becoming President will not be easy though, so this handy guide is here to help you every step of the way. (Full article...)

Did you know?

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  • ... that Billie Jean was not Michael Jackson's lover but Macaluey Culkin was?
  • ... that there are at least three other businesses like show business?
  • ... that the Uncyclopedia Discord link contains a virus called which infects your computer with the Uncyclopedia Discord?
  • ... that applause was invented to mock the deaf?
  • ... that, despite the invention of the doorbell, knock-knock jokes have yet to be replaced by ding-dong jokes?
  • ... that the The Root of All Evil is fishsticks?
  • ... that Abraham Lincoln was an accomplished skateboarder?

In the news

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Clearly not Deion Sanders vouching for his son

Ongoing: The wait for GTA VI, Silksong, and DeltaruneEurovisionRussian InvasionIsrael-Palestine conflictDOGE budget cuts • SWAT teams on guard for the "chicken jockey" scene of A Minecraft MovieTrump and Xi's tariff games • The IRS hunting late tax payers

Recent deaths: Jay North • SPOILER: Joel • Pope Francis • Shedeur Sanders' career, before it even started • Lar Park LinkinGawr GuraToxicityGirl-kisser and Harriet the Spy soundtrack artist Jill SobuleRuth BuzziLeBron James' playoff run

Upcoming deaths: U.S. and Global economy • Luigi MangioneKate MiddletonLaura PalmerDEIGoogle's ad monopoly • Cleveland Browns' locker room • LeBron James' career • Diddy's chance at freedom

On this day

IT BROKE NEW GROUND

May 4: "May the Schwartz Be With You" Day

Picture of the day

Pontius Pilot
The Pontius Pilot is infamous for some functionality issues. One typical complaint is that the Microsoft Crucifixion program often crucified incorrect and important data, such as the Messiah. Thankfully for its users, the file would miraculously reappear two days later after descending to the Recycle Bin, not three as some mathematically illiterate biblical scholars would tell you.

Image credit: Savethemooses
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