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Imagine a world in which every single person is given free access to the sum of all human stupidity. That's what we're doing.
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Today's Featured Article
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White History Month, (also known as Caucasian History Month), is an annual observance for remembrance of important people and events in the history of the Caucasian diaspora. It is celebrated annually in the United States every September. Before the United States was established, Caucasians were a minority race outnumbered by Africans, Asians and even Indians; they were often negated to ghettos and inner slums in their native hometowns of Europe and the United Kingdom. The treatment of them were staggering, many of them were forced to panhandle for money because they could not find work from their black employers, many of them were also beaten up in a show of superiority from the police force of which few Caucasians were admitted. It was not until the beginning of the American revolution that the caucasians would see a massive rise in population, thus bringing them closer to their peers.
With the establishment of the United States, the Caucasians made a place for their own; however, there was a huge problem in that African masters would often venture into the United States looking for Caucasian slaves. While enslaved, they were forced to do menial labor such as harvest crops and clean up the bathrooms of said Africans and whenever said Caucasian would get out of control, they'd be whipped or much worse, killed in front of their peers. (Full article...)
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On this day...
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March 1: National Grue Day
- 64000000 BC - Gruegasauri roam the plains waiting for unsuspecting tourists.
- 32 - Jesus gets eaten by a Grue. He then comes back from the dead, only to be eaten by another Grue.
- 1349 - Jack the Ripper's antique collection of Mongolian archers features in Forbes Magazine. This, according to Tony Blair, "does not compute".
- 1632 Gruel is invented by the Grues of London to morph English Orphans into Grues after long periods of eating it. This plot might have worked, since after 1692, all British Orphans disappeared.
- 1777 - The last remnants of the British army are eaten by a Grue.
- 1823 - Vin Diesel eats a Grue, and slowly morphs into one.
- 1951 - Hitler develops the concept of luring Grues into attacking foes, thus allowing him to win World War 2.
- 1985 - Landmark decision in Some v. Pestilence: Court rules a person eaten by a Grue cannot be held legally responsible for death or injury related to ingestion.
- 1987 - Danny DeVito becomes the first human - grue transplant recipient after a hunting accident involving two midgets and a circus elephant.
- 1995 - Grues destroy Constantinople, rebuild it as Istanbul.
- 1997 - Scientists develop Grue-proof armor, and promptly get eaten by Eurgs.
- 1999 - Ozzy Osbourne bites the head off a grue onstage, is promptly ignored as just another geek sideshow act.
- 2001 Joe Bob manages to slay a Grue, and is seconds later crushed by a falling rock.
- 2005 - Wales defeat the Grues 11-9 in a massive Six Nations Rugby upset. Unfortunately, the Welsh side are shortly after eaten by said Grues.
- 2006 'You are likely to be eaten by a grue' fever sweeps the nation.
- 2006 A grue creates uncyclopedia account. Then eats the account.
- 2007 - Another group of scientists develop armour that is both grue-proof and eurg-proof, so the universe implodes.
- 2009 - George W. Bush declared Grues to be "weapons of mass destruction".
- 2045 - The Dominant species of the planets are Grues, humans build big oven to cool humans for the feast of the Grues.
- AD 2101 - War was beginning. CATS battles the grues for control of the earth. The legendary Build-a-grue workshop opens during this time period.
- 2147- The grues are finally defeated- only to be replaced by the eurgs who then recreate grues to balance themselves.
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Word of the Day
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Ash Wednesday Try to use it in conversation. Knowledge is power.
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In the news
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Did you know...
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*... that if Mommy is willing to lie about a freaky old dude who sneaks into children's bedrooms in the middle of the night to eat your cookies and drink your milk, she'll no doubt be willing to deceive you about everything else?
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