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From today's featured article 

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Biffy Clyro is a Scottish rock band from Scotland. As well as being Scottish, nobody outside of the rainy isles has heard of them. The band is composed of one Scottish guy, and two other Scottish guys who are for some reason twins, even though they look nothing alike. During concerts, the trio are joined by musicians Mike Vennart and Dick "99% of Gamblers Quit Before They Win it Big" Ingram. Currently signed to 14th Floor Records, they have released at least six albums. Following the first three, their maybe-existent fan base grew to slightly larger numbers. As for who they actually are, I'm still not sure. I'm pretty sure they're a band, however. As well as being from Scotland, they are apparently very popular in the UK, which is not a place I've visited. As for their music... I'm not sure that exists either. (Full article...)

Did you know... 

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  • ... that when a grizzly bear becomes excited sexually it is known as a jizzly bear?
  • ... that Earth is the best planet in the world?
  • ... that within a few weeks of being held in captivity dolphins are able to train humans to stand at the side of a pool and throw them fish?
  • ... that the apostrophe is a small animal which has infected millions of books?
  • ... that I let the dogs out, and you can't do a goddamn thing about it?
  • ... that Cup Stacking is a real sport? No, really.
  • ... that the process of dying and coming back to life as a cow is known as reincownation?

In the news 

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On this day 

Self harm is bad in any form.

March 11: Stop Hitting Yourself Day (Mexico)

Picture of the day

Michael and the children.jpg
Like Jesus, Michael Jackson just wants the little children to come to him.

Image credit: Sonje
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This Uncyclopedia is written in English, supposedly. Started in 2005, it currently contains 40,981 articles. Many other parody wikis are available; some of the lamest are listed below.