User talk:Tom mayfair/Archives1

Talk Page Archives:
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Welcome!

Hello, Tom mayfair/Archives1, and welcome to Uncyclopedia! Thank you for your contributions. I hope you like the place and decide to stay. If not, the door's right over there... no, a little more to your left... yeah. Anyway, here are a few good links for nooblets:

• Beginner's Guide
• How to be funny and not just stupid

If you read anything at all, make it the above two links. If you want to find out more about Uncyclopedia or need more help with something, try these:

• About Uncyclopedia and The five pliers of Uncyclopedia
• Everything you ever wanted to know, but were afraid to ask
• Help Pages - if you need help with a specific issue

I hope you enjoy editing here and being an Uncyclopedian! Please sign your name on talk pages using four tildes (~~~~) or use the "sign" button () above the edit box. This will automatically produce your name and the date.

If you need help, ask me on my talk page, or ask at the Dump. Again, welcome!  -- Sir Codeine K·H·P·B·M·N·C·U·Bu. · (Harangue) 00:17, 23 July 2006 (UTC)

VFP Entry

Just some help: put your VFP entry at the top of the page. New ones go at the top. Nobody will see your image if you keep it where you have it now. -- Sir C  Holla | CUN 19:55, 11 August 2006 (UTC)

Sig

It appears there are still some problems...Actually, User:MoneySign would be one of the best people to ask, so see if he can help you get it perfect. -- Sir C  Holla | CUN 04:25, 13 August 2006 (UTC)

Mr. Potato Head

Hello there. I'm trying to enter this article as my entry to the Uncyclopedia:Poo Lit Surprise contest. Please don't chop up pieces of my article and put them in the Mr. Potato Head article. That article sucks without my portions, and those portions must remain with Pablo/Mr. Potato Head. If your a die hard Mr. Potato Head fan that must have a separate article about Mr. Potato Head let me know, but do not take portions of my article for it. Thank you.-- Sir Claudius CUN VFH (carpe diem) 20:37, 14 August 2006 (UTC)

Sorry about that. I just couldn't figure out why Mr Potato Head ended up here when the article was titled Pablo. Good luck in the poolit awards. --User:Tom mayfair/Sig 23:41, 14 August 2006 (UTC)

Thanks for the good luck wishes. After the contest is over we can talk about breaking the two articles up again if you like. Nice to meet you btw.-- Sir Claudius CUN VFH (carpe diem) 14:20, 15 August 2006 (UTC)

Is it just me...

...or did you steal my signature idea? XD -- SonicChao ^Babbel!_Contribs 12:09, 18 August 2006 (UTC)

Yeah, I stole it. I only steal from the finest.--User:Tom mayfair/Sig 20:25, 18 August 2006 (UTC)

VFP

Thanks for the vote. You just helped fulfill one of the more obscure prophecies in the Book o' Revelations.--Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 04:59, 20 August 2006 (UTC)

Who's Afwaid of a Widdle Apokowips?

When the end comes, remember, it's all your fault

---

Awesome!--User:Tom mayfair/Sig 05:03, 20 August 2006 (UTC)

Olive Wreath

This user has been given an Olive Wreath so they can hang it on their head. Ask and ye shall receive!

It exists so that I can give it to people for whatever reasons I choose..such as for asking why it exists. As such, consider yourself the latest recipient of the Olive Wreath; be sure to wear it on your head!-- Jayrod «Speek MUN WH» 16:02, 30 August 2006 (UTC)

ta-da!

Thou thast pleased me. Behold, put this where thou wishith

Awesome! Thank you.-- 12:43, 5 September 2006 (UTC)

sock puppets

I beleve freaud would interperate thant asyou wanting to sex a wattermellon --Private First Class Nappoleon V ^{Talk Decorations} 03:56, 7 September 2006 (UTC)

UGotM

Um, thanks for the nom, Tom. Are my edits/pages/pics and other minor contributions to Uncyc really that bad?--Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 17:28, 7 September 2006 (UTC)

Not really, but somebody has to get it since SU182 is not eligible & no one wanted me to get it.-- 11:55, 8 September 2006 (UTC)

That's possibly the worst excuse I've ever heard.--Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 11:56, 8 September 2006 (UTC)

HaHaHa. I can do a lot worse.-- 11:58, 8 September 2006 (UTC)

UGotM and UotY? You are a deeply weird person.--Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 14:57, 8 September 2006 (UTC)

I forgot to take my Paxil yesterday & today.-- 14:59, 8 September 2006 (UTC)

I don't believe that I deserve either award. On the one hand you've volunteered to be my nemesis, on the other my greatest ally. You're just confusing me.--Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 15:07, 8 September 2006 (UTC)

Idiot

Ok dude, lets sort this shit out. I didnt vandalize anything, you moron. You awarded yourself stuff you DID NOT earn, gave yourself a title you DID NOT earn, and included it in your sig. You see, you actually have to win your awards here, and you're pretty far from getting any so dont get your hopes up. Fact is, you couldnt even win UGOTM. That you put me on Ban Patrol is simply laughable. I didnt vandalize shit, you're the one who is making the site worse. By lying about your status, you are disrespecting good users who actually help this site and make it funnier. You will never be more than a MUN at the rate you're going, you have a better chance at being Queen of England. I mean come on, you WANTED to be UGOTM. Thats just pathetic. Stop disrespecting users who have value on this site. I initially thought you might be a decent Uncyclopedian, but I was dead wrong. -- Sir C  Holla | CUN 20:40, 10 September 2006 (UTC)

And while we're at it, STOP adding yourself to award pages. Official warning^TM. —rc (t) 06:16, 11 September 2006 (UTC)

Did you mother abandon you? Never tasted the goodness of a woman? Are you into anal sex or just enjoy having a stick up your ass? The thing to do in the situation is to come to the talk page in the first place & discuss the matter like a man rather than like a little boy sucking his thumb and taking it upon yourself (being that you are NOT an administrator & probably never will be) and altering my page plus my signature. It takes a low type of person not to speak up if someone has a problem. Here's some free advice, Grow up. Talk like a man or just shut up. The kiddy corner is at Wikipedia. Disrespecting seems to be your doing when it comes to individual users. Mine is all in good spirit and humor. I have nothing against anyone here. You take things way too seriously man. Why don't you get off the stick and chill out. Explain your problems in the future as an adult would. Other than that, I talked to Codeine & MoneySign and I told them I would remove my templates if it really bothered them. MoneySign was the one to revert your vandalism & last time I checked he is an Administrator, something you'll never be and I could careless if I became one. I enjoy my job of redlinks, dead ends, and redirects. Atleast I do that well if I can't think of articles as fast as some people. I don't care if I didn't earn the awards. It's the fact that you couldn't talk to me about it first that is the problem. It was weak and childish. I admit to not being the best person on Uncyclopedia and pointlessly making shit up & for that I am sorry. I didn't think it would result in tempers and really anal people. -- 12:07, 11 September 2006 (UTC)

PS I am sorry for being distasteful with my reply.-- 12:08, 11 September 2006 (UTC)

And sorry about that Rc. I forgot to go back & take those out. -- 12:14, 11 September 2006 (UTC)

OK I'm done with this, but all in all I find it hilarious that you call me childish when you start off by hurling childish insults like calling someone gay. Sorry, actually I date women, for what its worth. Also, with this "being a man crap", this is the internet dude, not a fight club. Oh and one last thing, I'm up for Uncyclopedian Of The Month. I think what I do just might be appreciated... -- Sir C  Holla | CUN 04:46, 12 September 2006 (UTC)

Did I say you were gay? Taking a stick anally just means you like your prostate massaged, it don't make you necessarily gay. And you might want to relook at what you wrote when it comes to insults. This is the internet, not a fight club, this is true. But that has nothing to do with being a man. Being a man is owning up to responsibilities such as having a problem with how I do things here and coming to me and explaining how you feel about it. It doesn't involve fighting. I don't know how you got fighting out of that. And like I said before, I really don't care about awards. It's all a joke to me. I went to the IRC & talked to Codeine & MoneySign and said that I would leave the real awards alone, as a man would when a problem is presented. I'm no longer stooping to your level of "I'm better than you" talk. I'll leave that to you. Take care.-- 13:10, 12 September 2006 (UTC)

Ladies, ladies, please. There's no point in letting this get personal. We're all here because we want to make Uncyclopedia a better, funnier place. In order to do this as a collective we do need certain rules. Lets just draw a nice line under this, move on and get back to the business of "funny". -- Sir Mhaille  (talk to me)

*Applause* -- The Colonel (talk) 13:35, 12 September 2006 (UTC)

*Hands Mhaille a Dozen roses*-- 13:37, 12 September 2006 (UTC)

Stop

Stop it, just stop. Stop. You're pushing buttons that have already been pushed too far. The Cornbread quotes are too much (the reason they fluctuate wildly from praise to damnation is that your action fluctuate wildly from helpful to dumbfuckery). This feud has to stop. Move on.--Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 15:22, 14 September 2006 (UTC)

These words are not fake and were spoken directly to me from Sir Cornbread. I have no feud. I think it's hilarious. I'm not the one with the temper. How would you feel if your user page was altered by a non-admin, regardless of the content. My "fake" templates were put back by Money$ign which indicates that Sir Cornmuffin had no right to touch my page. I talked to Money$ign & Codeine on the IRC & they asked me to removed them for the sake of upset people. Feud? I think he's just upset that he was wrong in his doing. I'll stop when childish games cease (the GotM is still active). And how does my user page even qualify for bad edits to Uncyclopedia? Review my edits to articles & see what I really do around here. As for nominating you for things, it was not out of hating you. I really enjoy your contributions. Anyways...-- 15:40, 14 September 2006 (UTC)

"Fake" awards annoy people because some of us do "comedy" and "satire" to "earn" things like the respect of fellow uncyclopedians and the chance of them liking our stuff enough to vote for a good award (UotM, WotM, Foolitzer...pretty much every page that you spoofed to make it appear that you'd won them. Very bad karma, by the way. I'm surprised that didn't "earn" you a ban). Cornbread was too quick off the draw with removing them from your page...he should have liaised with an admin first.--Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 15:53, 14 September 2006 (UTC)

I don't know why people have to keep explaining "why" "fake" awards upset people. I learned this after "talking" with admins and understand. Have I added anymore since? No. I apologized and if people can't accept it, then that is their problem. I was not banned due to the fact that I don't cause problems normally. I'm still new to this & learning with the help of admins and people that "talk" before acting. I do contribute to Uncyclopedia. Mostly with redlinks, dead ends, & redirects. -- 16:16, 14 September 2006 (UTC)

Keep that up. When you go to do something ask yourself, "What would Jesus do?". I don't know what that means, but I hear it helps some people. Continue being helpful and we'll try to put this mess behind us.--Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 16:27, 14 September 2006 (UTC)

Will do. Take care.-- 16:29, 14 September 2006 (UTC)

But if you're asking yourself that, remember that Jesus got killed, so maybe his decision making isn't so great after all. -- Sir Codeine K·H·P·B·M·N·C·U·Bu. · (Harangue) 12:42, 22 September 2006 (UTC)

...but is it not in the Gospel According to Jim that, "And He didst say, 'For truly one is blessed that dies young and leaves no corpse.'"?--Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 14:33, 22 September 2006 (UTC)

Suburban homeboy

In honour of your good taste and breeding for selecting a deep, socially conscious and literate satire as Suburban homeboy for featuring, I tip my cap to you. Hurrah!--Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 06:10, 19 September 2006 (UTC)

A Question

hey tom im kinda new and newbish but i wanted to ask how u made all those cool sigs and templates and stuff. plz tell me if you know anywhere I can read some tutorials. also, redirect this to the right spot if i have misplaced it. thanks, peppermint

Go to User:Tom_mayfair/sig. Just hit the edit button and it will show the coding system for the picture & links. But don't edit it. If you need more details I can elaborate more. Just let me know. Remember to use the ~~~~ to post your signature. when using a talk page and conversating. Use this link: http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User:Peppermint_Wardrobe/sig to start creating your signature. When you are finished, let me know and I will tell you the steps to make it work. Use mine as a model to build off of. My sig used to look similar to User:SonicChao but over time I made it my own. Good luck. 15:35, 22 September 2006 (UTC)

...

So very sorry if I have acted like n00b of the month, and if my material is bad, I apologize. I just spooned everything from Wikipedia anyway. Oh! And I'll sign.

--Neppset 20:00, 21 September 2006 (UTC)

It's just a welcome letter. I noticed that you hadn't been properly welcomed to Uncyclopedia is all. Hope you enjoy contributing. 00:21, 22 September 2006 (UTC)

And Noob of the Month is actually a rather prestigious award. —rc (t) 00:23, 22 September 2006 (UTC)

Emphasis, in this case, on the rather --Sir Hardwick Fundlebuggy (Bleat) 14:43, 22 September 2006 (UTC)

This is true. You would be consider GotM just like me. 00:32, 22 September 2006 (UTC)

That Sounds prestigious to me!! and thanks for the welcome... nice to be noticed. This humour thing is harder than it looks.Soul101 21:08, 23 September 2006 (UTC)

American Fundie Magazine

This humble Uncyclopedian thanks you for your vote. It warms my jaded heart to know that there is, indeed, a place for satire on Uncyc, even the blunt, spooky shit. You're also one of the users who voted for Suburban homeboy and the Fifth Horseman, so it's partly your fault that this has been my best couple of months here, ever.--Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 10:55, 23 September 2006 (UTC)

Hello

I created my account months ago, and I recieved a welcome message today. Uncyclopedia is way faster than Wikipedia. Anyway, do you think an article written about a dickhead loser from Wikipedia will be good enough to not be deleted? - Ivan Kricancic 13:41, 25 September 2006 (UTC)

Sorry that the welcome was so late. I just started welcoming people recently. I don't think the administrators will keep an article about someone that has no value to history or current events. They will see it as a vanity article. You can always try to make it about someone famous. I know, easier said then done. Good luck. 13:49, 25 September 2006 (UTC)

Does codeines mom know the guy? Soul101 ~_MA^REPENT!

Okay, it took ya how long to notice me?

I'm not a big feature but dammit I'm me, that should be good enough!

Ahem, sorry, thanks for the, er, warm welcome ^^

Yeah, I read all the stuff you left me thanks.

And I'm finding it difficult to find pages I wanna create that aren't already created (some actually quite crap). I know you probably care not a bit but I just had to get that off my chest.

Love and luck and various other shiny happy things --Lilac 20:07, 30 September 2006 (UTC)

Sorry to have took so long to notice you. I just recently started welcoming people. If you feel that an article is crap, you can always discuss the article and rewrite it if you feel that it can be more humorous. I have done it myself with the article Skeet. It sucked a lot before and now it just sucks less. Good luck. And we are here if you have any questions and you can log onto the IRC. 20:22, 30 September 2006 (UTC)

Etch-A-Sculpt

What did the "!?" mean in your vote on VFP? Also, I fixed your second vote, as it was for a pic that's already featured (use Uncyclopedia:PFP to vote on previously featured pics).--Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 20:25, 30 September 2006 (UTC)

It was an expression of "wtf" basicly. You can do better. 20:28, 30 September 2006 (UTC)

Really? I like it. Maybe it's just the stupid amount of time I wasted as a kid trying to draw a circle on the damn thing.--Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 20:37, 30 September 2006 (UTC)

Stegosaurus

Hi Tom,

You recently tagged my article Stegosaurus for deletion. I'm really new to Uncyclopedia, and have only made a few edits. I tried to follow the guidelines (keeping it encyclopedic in tone), but your reaction indicates it's just not funny; irredeemably so, apparently. Is there something I can do to make it humorous enough for keeping around the place? I wrote it because I found it amusing, but it's so hard to tell what someone else will find humorous. I want to add a picture, but what is the point, if it's just going to get deleted in a few days? Any tips? Firsfron 05:33, 1 October 2006 (UTC)

Here's what you need to do to protect an article that is not finished. Go to this link >>>User:Firsfron/Stegosaurus<<< and paste your work there. This is your work space so that your work is not in danger. No tips. People here think I lack humor. After your article is complete, paste it back into Stegosaurus. Good luck. 05:43, 1 October 2006 (UTC)

Thanks. I'll work to make this article better. Firsfron 06:18, 1 October 2006 (UTC)

== In Soviet Russia, you thank me!!! --Jagermeister 23:18, 6 October 2006 (UTC)

That was crappy for a headline, anyways, thanks for the welcome!

Just don't forget to use the button when leaving a message. 06:40, 1 October 2006 (UTC)

revert

o.o whats that mean?

You forgot to sign it you dumbass. 12:19, 3 October 2006 (UTC)

Thanks for the nomination

You get a Zidanese shuriken Ninjastar not only for your nom, but for being a good old commie comrade :D NeoZidane CUNT Headbutt extraordinaire ______соединяйтесь! 19:32, 3 October 2006 (UTC)

^_^

Why do you add "^_^" to the end of all your edits? Just wondering...-- SonicChao ^Babbel!_Contribs 23:29, 3 October 2006 (UTC)

It indicates that I've tooken my paxil. 23:34, 3 October 2006 (UTC)

So, without it your comment would be something like ">>" or "-__-"? I prefer ^_^, actually. (however, it looks funny to see in Uncyclopedia:Ban Patrol's history "Ban ^_^". -- SonicChao ^Babbel!_Contribs 23:48, 3 October 2006 (UTC)

Gives everything a calm & mellow feeling. Some people get upset when I do anything on here. Thanks for noticing. 23:56, 3 October 2006 (UTC)

Not upset. Just curious. No one else does it. -- SonicChao ^Babbel!_Contribs 02:58, 4 October 2006 (UTC)

Gives me the opposite. I get the feeling that a thousand communist Chinese are involved in every edit. Must be my american "guns are for killing commies" upbringing or something. Sir Famine, Gun ♣ Petition » 00:12, 4 October 2006 (UTC)

*Will win the war without a single shot* or so I am told. *goes back to work on his 200,000,000 comrades in exporting* 00:40, 4 October 2006 (UTC)

You should see his printing; hearts dotting the "i"s. Adorable!--Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 23:57, 3 October 2006 (UTC)

Etch-a-Sculpt

Thanks for the change, but PFP is for voting on pics that are already featured. I know it's spelled wrong there, Rcmurphy will catch it soon, methinks. If not I'll leave a message on his talkpage.--Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 01:05, 4 October 2006 (UTC)

American liberals

I’m creating this article due to disagreements over the liberals article. My argument is that abortion is not related to the articles. A person, hidden by an I.P. address keeps saying it is. I suggested it would more suited to an article about American liberals. If you want to know more about what this guy is suying I suggest you check out the discussion page. I will try to put the American liberals article together over the next few days. Thanks. Weri long wang 15:40, 7 October 2006 (UTC)

.............? 00:37, 8 October 2006 (UTC)

The article I wrote Liberal Terrorists got changed to one about UK Liberals. How about we write/add to something called Liberal Democrats instead of American Liberals or US Liberals or maybe Liberal Terrorists/USA or something? Then link them to HowTo:Be a liberal and Holy Bible: Revised Liberal Edition which are about American Liberals or whatever anyway. --Lt. Orion Blastar (talk) 22:33, 14 October 2006 (UTC)

.............! 22:35, 14 October 2006 (UTC)

Deal with me

Thanks for your message. I want to buy all the uranium as I require them to produce power to run the servers hosting this web-unsite. Please be fast, I shall be paying the least amount. Others may come and take the uranium at higher price, and so you will have the problem of un-banking with more money. Waiting for the most encyclopedic reaction. --Bhadani 17:11, 8 October 2006 (UTC)

Thanks for the Shukran!

Even though I was slacking on that field lately...Here, have a cookie!

Mahmoud Ahmadinejad has awarded you a Nuclear missile Now go and destroy the The Zionist Entity This Template Will Self Destruct in seconds

-- Brigadier Sir Mordillo GUN UotY WotM FP UotM AotM MI³ AnotM VFH +S 18:51, 8 October 2006 (UTC)

Awesome! Thanks a lot. 00:52, 9 October 2006 (UTC)

How do you find the so fast?

The noobs to welcome that is? Do you have a trick? -- Brigadier Sir Mordillo GUN UotY WotM FP UotM AotM MI³ AnotM VFH +S 14:16, 10 October 2006 (UTC)

I usually just do the viewing of the 500 edits & just find them. Also use the other Namespace to view deeper back into the categories to find the bastards. Thanks for helping. 14:30, 10 October 2006 (UTC)

Damn, and here I was thinking you have a magic wand or something...-- Brigadier Sir Mordillo GUN UotY WotM FP UotM AotM MI³ AnotM VFH +S 14:32, 10 October 2006 (UTC)

Gimme a chance!

Heh. Still working on it. If I sign it in the template, won't that freeze the timestamp? I figured I'd just invoke the template on the noob's talk page, and sign it there.

Perhaps we should put the "default" message on a WC subpage, so others can use it as a template, if they wish.

God, it's late. . .  Sir Tooltroll, Esq. CUN • Eh? • Oh! • UnTunes! •• I my cat! 13:05, 14 October 2006 (UTC)

Oh. Now I see it. subst:welcome. . . Me sleep now. . .  Sir Tooltroll, Esq. CUN • Eh? • Oh! • UnTunes! •• I my cat! 13:09, 14 October 2006 (UTC)

Sorry for jumpin' the gun. I had faith that you would figure it out. This is how I do it... {{subst:welcome}}~~~~{{Template:MOOU}}
13:16, 14 October 2006 (UTC)

Yup. That's what I figgered. I've customized my copy a bit so I'll just subst: mine in, instead of the default. Why do you put the MOOU template? Just wonderin'  Sir Tooltroll, Esq. CUN • Eh? • Oh! • UnTunes! •• I my cat! 13:30, 14 October 2006 (UTC)

It just makes the newbie feel like they're somebody. A template for them to decorate their user page with since usually they have nothing on it. 13:35, 14 October 2006 (UTC)

Ah, I see. Money$ign never gave me one of those. . . Guess I should go whine at him :) 'Course, I was here for months before anybody noticed. . . snif. . . poor little me.

Ok, this time I really am going to sleep. Zzzzzzzzzzz  Sir Tooltroll, Esq. CUN • Eh? • Oh! • UnTunes! •• I my cat! 13:43, 14 October 2006 (UTC)

Uncyclopedian of the Month

Thanks for your vote for me. I can use all the help I can get. Maybe we can work together on some articles about liberals or something? :) --Lt. Orion Blastar (talk) 22:35, 14 October 2006 (UTC)

The Blaque

I never knew we were sworn enemies! At least I get a userbox with my name in it. Maybe I'll make one for you...later. The Blaque

Apparently I am the new/n00b sworn enemy-can I get a userbox w/your name on it for you? muahaha RochelleCMN 19:03, 16 October 2006 (UTC)

Wow, it so happens that I am infact also my very own nemesis. How can this be? 11:32, 17 October 2006 (UTC)

That was funny . . . The Blaque

Rice80

Tom, I am still fairly new here, could you tell me how to delete an article? Or just, delete Lilo Pelekai for me, it sucks ass. --Rice80 03:04, 18 October 2006 (UTC)

And, could you tell me how to nominate an article to be featured? I think UnBooks:Rigism should be featured. Thanks. --Rice80 20:05, 17 October 2006 (PDT)

I can't delete it. One, I don't have the power. Two, You were not the original creator of the article. An administrator said no to the deletion. Nominations are made at the VFH. Here is an example of what it should look like:

==[[Walgreens Drug Store]]==
{{s|+1 pissed off customer}}
*'''Nom''' & '''For''' Witty comment here. ~~~~.
12:17, 18 October 2006 (UTC)

Hey

Hey, thanks for the welcome on my talk page, I'm surprised someone noticed my registration. I've read through a few of those links already, and it's helping me out formatting wise. Anyway, thanks for the welcome, the first one I've ever gotten that wasn't an automated email. --Magical1492 01:10, 27 October 2006 (UTC)

Your welcome. I hope you enjoy editting & writing with Uncyclopedia. Just remember that you can ask us anything & we will help in anyway we can. 11:30, 27 October 2006 (UTC)

Ditto

Please feel free to copyedit my first contribution Inflorescence. Thanks. PopOught 20:51, 29 October 2006 (UTC)

Thank you

Thanks for your welcome :) LadySway1985 02:39, 1 November 2006 (UTC)

In Soviet Russia, Premier Tom Mayfair welcomes YOU!! 02:55, 1 November 2006 (UTC)

^_^

Congratulations Comrade!

For the distribution of the communist ^_^ all throughout this capitalistic and unworthy American imperialist web site. The Motherland is proud of you! Keep up the good work!

-- Comrade Mordillo

---

Thank you ^_^ 12:26, 3 November 2006 (UTC)

Congrats on the featured image... -- Sir Mhaille  (talk to me)

Congratulations!

Congratulations on the featured image! And thanks for the award (I've moved it to my userpage), but more importantly, thanks for the userbox. I'm now giving it a page of its very own:

User:Tom Mayfair/User Chickenbox

--Micoolio101 ^{(whine • vandalism)} 03:28, 4 November 2006 (UTC)

Thanks. Now it is immortalized... in a userbox ^_^ 03:55, 4 November 2006 (UTC)

Though that page it's at isn't technically a sub-page of yours... note the capital M on Mayfair. • Spang • ☃ • talk • 22:18, 4 November 2006 (UTC)

Eh? What you talkin' 'bout Willis? 22:22, 4 November 2006 (UTC)

The Chickenbox article

I've nominated the article for VFH. So during the mean time, I think this page should be left alone until it succeeds or fails. --Micoolio101 ^{(whine • vandalism)} 07:31, 4 November 2006 (UTC)

I'm back from about 25 edits. Just bringing it up to standard. Also, I don't think we should have the chickenbox imitator image, so I've removed it. What do you think? --Micoolio101 ^{(whine • vandalism)} 07:47, 4 November 2006 (UTC)

It's lookin' better. 17:10, 5 November 2006 (UTC)

Hi

Thank you for the welcome --Funny man 23:42, 4 November 2006 (UTC) Your Welcome ^_^ 23:43, 4 November 2006 (UTC)

Nicely done.

Somebody has awarded you a cookie! Now go play in traffic.

Thanks for keeping an eye out, Tom. :) ~ Major Sir Todd Lyons GUN WotM MI UotM NotM MDA VFH AotM Bur. AlBur. CM NS PC 02:18, 7 November 2006 (UTC)

No, No. Thank you. 02:55, 7 November 2006 (UTC)

Re: Template:AmericanUser

Your edit to Template:AmericanUser [1] might have made the HTML look more valid, but unfortunately the fix doesn't seem to be correct, as the added </table> is showing up in the text of the transcluded template. I am going to assume good faith here, but I still have to revert the change for now. When you come up with a better fix, please feel free to commit it anytime. Pentium5dot1 20:08, 11 November 2006 (UTC)

Ah, sorry it didn't help. Stupid Wiki cleanup. 20:10, 11 November 2006 (UTC)

I have just re-reverted it to a previous correct version. I think you might have misplaced the </table>. Pentium5dot1 20:13, 11 November 2006 (UTC)

Reefer Desk/Chickenbox

Have a look. And yes, I'm still obsessed with this. --Micoolio101 ^{(whine • vandalism)} 09:06, 12 November 2006 (UTC)

I need you

Pictures? Need I say more? --♥ Lacey • clicky 21:02, 12 November 2006 (UTC)

Avatars?

Can we have avatars on this site?--Metropolisforever 15:44, 18 November 2006 (UTC)

On user pages but I don't recommend them for articles. 15:45, 18 November 2006 (UTC)

User:Metropolisforever/Q-taro

Is the page ready now?--Metropolisforever 15:54, 18 November 2006 (UTC)

Not even close. It would be deleted on site. It's too short & lacks humor. It has to be on the lines of an article that you would find on Wikipedia in style. I advise adding more content. 15:57, 18 November 2006 (UTC)

Okay, I added some more humor to it.--Metropolisforever 16:05, 18 November 2006 (UTC)

Here's an example of some articles: Chickenbox, Walgreens Drug Store, Tap, Skeet. Look at them and see how they are laid out. That is what an article should look like. What you have would be considered a stub. It would not last long in the article world. I would be deleted with the quickness. 16:09, 18 November 2006 (UTC)

New users

Hey, that's an idea! I'll be the bad cop, you'll be the good cop! - Sikon 15:58, 18 November 2006 (UTC)

That works. ^_^ 15:59, 18 November 2006 (UTC)

Arses

The Blonde One is a relevant artical. - Carl Gustav Junk ;-)

But unrelated to the other articles. I left it at the Sweden article because it relates. 16:12, 18 November 2006 (UTC)

No, it is related. The article is about bottoms. Sorry I thought you were trying to be funny, instead you must not have realised hyow it relates. The article The Blonde One is a spoof of both Thor's daughter and Agnetha Faltskog. Agnetha Faltskog is famous for her bottom; it one rear of the year. It is as related to the article as J Lo etc... :-) - Carl

Sign your comments please with the signature button. Okay, I'll let it stay even though the picture is terrible and doesn't do the arse justice. Take care. 16:22, 18 November 2006 (UTC)

Which one? The article has two pictures (one with a bottom!), it is a nicer bottom than J Lo's, in my honest opinion. User:Carl Gustav Junk

Nice but the picture quality does not do it an justice. 16:28, 18 November 2006 (UTC)

I sort of agree. I may use a screen capture of my own when I get my other PC back. User:Carl Gustav Junk

Thanks for the cookie, comrade! - User:Carl Gustav Junk

How?

How do I nominate Template:Black Jesus for deletion?--Metropolisforever 16:21, 18 November 2006 (UTC)

Take it to the VFD. Just remember that it's not really racist. It's just poking fun of stereotypes. If it were a white jesus in a stereotypical situation I would find it funny. There's is a difference at funny & racist. Funny is love & racism is hate. 16:26, 18 November 2006 (UTC)

Sorry.--Metropolisforever 16:29, 18 November 2006 (UTC)

And please follow the instructions on the page. 16:30, 18 November 2006 (UTC)

Image:Ssammich.jpg

I would like to delete this image. It is not funny. It's just stupid (and disgusting.)--Metropolisforever 17:18, 19 November 2006 (UTC)

I don't have the power to delete it. Besides, it's being used at 7 different locations on the site. My only job here is to help new users, fix severe redlinks & deadends, create redirects, and just watch over edits. Technically these aren't even my jobs. I volunteer to do these things for the greater good of Uncyclopedia. I seriously doubt it would get deleted based on only your opinion of it. I find it digusting too but that doesn't mean that someone else has the same opinion. This site is a collective of different types of humoUr & random sarcasms & to each there own. 18:17, 19 November 2006 (UTC)

Who do I talk to to get it deleted?--Metropolisforever 18:53, 19 November 2006 (UTC)

Anyone of these people within the link but be cautious. They don't like to be bothered over personal views. Just a warning. 18:57, 19 November 2006 (UTC)

How?

How do I change my signature?--Metropolisforever 21:38, 19 November 2006 (UTC)

Try Signature templates...and remember that the pic you currently use is way too tall for use in a sig. (Tom, sorry for the driveby...) --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 21:56, 19 November 2006 (UTC)

Quite alright, Modusoperandi. Thanks for helping. 22:03, 19 November 2006 (UTC)

ROFLMAO!

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL--Metropolisforever 00:53, 22 November 2006 (UTC)

.............What? 00:53, 22 November 2006 (UTC)

I need help.

Please see my discussion page for more information. --Guido Arbia 11:37, 22 November 2006 (UTC)

Well there's nothing I can do about that. Just beg to the administrator of your choice whenever in this situation again. Just try not to get there again. 18:24, 22 November 2006 (UTC)

Aaagh my eyes!

Dear God, make it stop.

That new welcome template of yours is horrible!. I'm a bit concerned that the violently clashing colours might discourage n00bs from reading the links too closely... let me know if you've had any feedback on it, or maybe consider changing the link text colour to something a bit less epilepsy inducing... ;-P -- Sir Codeine K·H·P·B·M·N·C·U·Bu. · (Harangue) 12:21, 23 November 2006 (UTC)

Look at it now & tell me if it's still an eye sore. 03:22, 24 November 2006 (UTC)

A thing of beauty my friend, thing of beauty. :-) -- Sir Codeine K·H·P·B·M·N·C·U·Bu. · (Harangue) 08:53, 24 November 2006 (UTC)

Userbox

Is "This user is the sworn nemesis of Rice80" a s/n trick? --Rice80 04:16, 24 November 2006 (UTC)

Here's the code I use to make it:

<div style="float: left; border:solid black 1px; margin: 1px;"> {| cellspacing="0" style="width: 238px; background: white;" | style="width: 45px; height: 45px; background: white; text-align: center; font-size: {{{5|{{{id-s|14}}}}}}pt; color: {{{id-fc|black}}};" | '''[[Image:Leftswordguy.gif|40px]] ''' | style="font-size: {{{info-s|8}}}pt; padding: 4pt; line-height: 1.25em; color: {{{info-fc|black}}};" | '''This user is the sworn Nemesis of [[special:mypage|{{USERNAME}}]]'''. |}</div><br clear="all" />

This user is the sworn Nemesis of <insert name here>.

14:51, 24 November 2006 (UTC)

So when you see it, you're your own nemesis? --Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 23:48, 24 November 2006 (UTC)

Thanks --Rice80 04:22, 25 November 2006 (UTC)

The Coalition of the People of Overated Roaming Gypsy War Bands (CPROGWB) will somewhat tolerate your behavior of declaring God Ub3rGypsy challengeable.--Ub3rGypsy the DemiGod 19:06, 28 November 2006 (UTC)

Cookie

Hindleyite has awarded you a cookie! Now go play in traffic.

Fried Flying Gyspsy flavour. Thanks for the vote! -- Hindleyite Converse • ?pedia 19:31, 24 November 2006 (UTC)

Another Cookie

ENeGMA has awarded you a cookie! Now go play in traffic.

You asked for it! And who am I to deny you a cookie oppurtunity? --Sir ENeGMA (talk) GUN WotM PLS 22:33, 24 November 2006 (UTC)

No, no, thank YOU

Hey, congratulations!!! For voting in favor of Uncyclopedia for Dummies at VFH, DiZ has awarded you by killing a martyr in your name! Don't feel guilty, he didn't pay his taxes anyways. -- DiZ the Great

If we can weather this, we'll know we were meant to be together. --Señor DiZtheGreat  CUN AOTM ( Worship me!) (Praise me!) (Join me!) AMEN! 18:47, 25 November 2006 (UTC)

PinkoFAG!

Like the whole commie thing on your page. The end. AhhDiddums 05:14, 27 November 2006 (UTC)

You rawk

ORDER OF LYONS ~ 3rd CLASS For demonstration of conduct most becoming an Uncyclopedian ~ virtue, mercy, courage, valour, fairness, protection of the weak and the poor, or some reasonable fascimile thereof, you are hereby instated to the Order of Lyons, with all the rights and privileges pertaining thereto, should any ever exist.

I really think you should be a sysop, whenever we get around to adding a couple more. ~ Sir Todd GUN WotM MI UotM NotM MDA VFH AotM Bur. AlBur. CM NS PC (talk) 19:18, 27 November 2006 (UTC)

This template of praise is such an honor. I don't know what to say. But I don't see how anything I do can be compared to your work. You're a god here. Your work is very admirable. Thank you for noticing my efforts. ^_^ 21:08, 27 November 2006 (UTC)

In addition to just being involved with what's going on all around the site, your effort in welcoming people is what really impresses me. It's constant and mind-numbing work to be welcoming people as they come in, but it's valuable. I'm here because Paulgb and Mhaille noticed that I arrived and took an interest in what I was working on. And so I was hooked... :) ~ Sir Todd GUN WotM MI UotM NotM MDA VFH AotM Bur. AlBur. CM NS PC (talk) 22:22, 27 November 2006 (UTC)

Not to mention that Sannse makes me check their block logs and contributions before submitting the welcome in case they are gobshites. And I mean look at the history & read between the lines. Now that is a damn headache. And trying to stay positive with some of the morons on here. I don't want to be a bad guy here and would like the newbies to feel as welcomed as I felt when Money$ign & Codeine counselled me about the place. Some user(s) go about it negatively & I don't want to be like that. And yes, I'm hooked as well. ^_^ 22:39, 27 November 2006 (UTC)

Oooh...

For making his administration duties on Uncyc easier by pointing out a vandal he otherwise would have missed, Hinoa hereby awards you this semi-valuable shiny thing! Yay!

Enjoy. —Hinoa KUN (talk) 22:01, 28 November 2006 (UTC)

Thank You ^_^ 22:02, 28 November 2006 (UTC)

sorry

sorry for touching your user page. won't happen again! - Das0408--das0408 18:13, 29 November 2006 (UTC)

Dynasty Warriors

Hey Tom, YouFang here. I'm a new contributor. I see you reverted a page I recently edited, Dynasty Warriors, back to its original form by the original author. I completely rewrote it, and perhaps I overstepped my bounds by doing so. However, I felt that this page really needed work, as it descended frequently into nonsense and 1337. What steps do I have to take to get rid of that crud and put my article back up? (apologies if the original author is reading this) YouFang 19:13, 29 November 2006 (UTC)YouFang

Why did it start to turn into a homo article? 19:15, 29 November 2006 (UTC)

Dynasty Warriors has a kind of homoeroticism that is not blatant, except with characters like Zhang He, in which it is in yo' face. I'd like to think I approached it from a more mature angle than my predecessor. By the way, I see my article is up. I'll be tinkering with it for the next little while. Thanks! YouFang 22:41, 30 November 2006 (UTC)YouFangYouFang 22:41, 30 November 2006 (UTC)

hate article

is hate some kind of practical joke played on n00bs? (scroll down) please get rid of it, cause if you don't i will. thanks!--das0408 21:09, 29 November 2006 (UTC)

==Things that {{USERNAME}} Hates ==. It's just a code that inserts the user's name that is reading the article. It's not directed at newbies or yourself. It's just a joke. And no, I will not get rid of it. And if you remove it I will see that you get blocked for an unknown amount of time.
Take Care ^_^ 21:35, 29 November 2006 (UTC)

well can it at least be a different user? --das0408 02:36, 30 November 2006 (UTC) sorry it came out a little harsh earlier.--das0408 02:53, 30 November 2006 (UTC)

Slut

You totally know you are. Grr. :) You left before I could comment on your addition to my talk page. Hehe. :) --♥ Lacey • clicky 23:30, 29 November 2006 (UTC)

Thanks

Somebody has awarded you a cookie! Now go play in traffic.

Javascript help

I noticed your request for javascript help, and have fixed your problem. The code should have been at User:Tom mayfair/uncyclopedia.css instead, as it's css, not javascript. Refresh your browser and it should work. Have fun! • Spang • ☃ • talk • 00:24, 1 Dec 2006

Thank you so much Spang! 00:27, 1 December 2006 (UTC)

And Braydie sends his thanks too. ^_^ 00:39, 1 December 2006 (UTC)

Thanks --—Braydie 00:50, 1 December 2006 (UTC)

NotM

Braydie has awarded you a cookie! Now go play in traffic.

Thanks for voting me at NotM --—Braydie 00:50, 1 December 2006 (UTC)

Reply

Oh I know that well, I had a taste in newark last year ;]. ps: I really was drunk when I did the edit, honest! The anarch 22:30, 2 December 2006 (UTC)

Your Welcome Template

Nice smallprint at the bottom. --—Braydie 19:36, 3 December 2006 (UTC)

Thanks. Money$ign said that it made Uncyclopedia look like a Communist forum to new users. 19:39, 3 December 2006 (UTC)

Lol, good old $. So is that your default welcome now? --—Braydie 19:41, 3 December 2006 (UTC)

Yep, use the codin' and create your own, just make it {{Subst:User:Braydie/Temp:Welcome}} for the user space address. 19:57, 3 December 2006 (UTC)

Voting.

Somebody has awarded you a cookie! Now go play in traffic.

This, of course, is not only for Writer of the Month, but for nearly every article I've ever had at VFH. Thanks for being my token vote! -- §. | WotM | PLS | T | C | A 22:34, 3 December 2006 (UTC)

I always knew I was a sockpuppet of someone. I just didn't know who. ^_^ 22:44, 3 December 2006 (UTC)

Red Links and Dead Ends

Well you are the first person to recieve this award. Congrats!

Braydie has awarded you some ice cream! For clearing up the Dead Ends and Red Links.

--—Braydie 20:07, 4 December 2006 (UTC)

Award

Thank you for your support, Comrade. Without your help, my crusade against the kulaks would not be so successful. --Sir ENeGMA (talk) GUN WotM PLS 21:35, 4 December 2006 (UTC)

Oh noes!

Upon reading this: http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/User_talk:Citrusmirakel I am afraid I may have committed some kind of unwritten wikicrime! I did appreciate your welcome template on my talk page, and upon LOOKING IT OVER and absorbing the knowledge held within, I felt I could safely delete it. Am I to be tarred and feathered? Also despite my best efforts I can't seem to close the center tag in the above message =/

/sobs pathetically. --Ceridwyn 01:56, 5 December 2006 (UTC)

It's not a crime. It's just how I said, "It is consider an insult & rude to the Uncyclopedia community to remove things from your talk page." I would rather let a person know how the community reacts than to let him be seen as a sockpuppet and has something to hide of which there is really nothing to hide in the history. So you don't have to get your panties all in a bunch. I'm just passing on the knowledge that the administrators passed on to me. You can stop crying now. ^_^ 02:14, 5 December 2006 (UTC)

No bunching here :D Although I'm still somewhat confused...Generally I would never delete something from my talk page, except for the big glaring "I'M NEW HERE!!!" sign :P --Ceridwyn 02:35, 5 December 2006 (UTC)

No worries. 03:09, 5 December 2006 (UTC)

Здравствуи!

Тенк ју фор јоур велкам гритинг. Ај ем глад ту контрибјут он Ансајклопидија. Гритингс, Loshmi 11:07, 5 December 2006 (UTC)

I don't speak, read, or write in Russian. Sorry, & your welcome. 17:55, 6 December 2006 (UTC)

It isn't Russian (only the header is Russian for Hello). It's transliterated English, and it means: "Thank you for your welcome greeting. I am glad to contribute to Uncyclopedia." - Sikon 19:31, 6 December 2006 (UTC)

Thanks Sikon, ^_^ 20:42, 6 December 2006 (UTC)

VFH

Braydie has awarded you some ice cream! For voting for HowTo:Make a Band

--—Braydie 17:05, 5 December 2006 (UTC)

Cookie!

sannse makes the best cookies in the world. And she's given you one. for welcoming vandals, with style

Welcome

Nice welcome message, adds a personal touch--Sir Silent Penguin "your site makes no sence" The illusion is complete 21:16, 5 December 2006 (UTC)

Thanks ^_^ 21:20, 5 December 2006 (UTC)

your welcome--Sir Silent Penguin "your site makes no sence" The illusion is complete 21:26, 5 December 2006 (UTC)

NRV

According to some people ® has "no redeeming value".--Metropolisforever 23:01, 5 December 2006 (UTC)

It's because you don't write enough to make it considered an article. If you plan on creating articles in the future, try to make them with more substance. Just adding templates doesn't make it an article. Expand on your information.... A lot. 00:33, 6 December 2006 (UTC)

You can't possibly expect me to writa an entire article in one sitting. I have a life.--Metropolisforever 13:43, 6 December 2006 (UTC)

Then follow the proper procedures. Using the {{construction}} template allows you a week to get the article written. After the week & it looks incomplete, or is found to be gobshite, an administrator will delete it. You can always use your name space to at advoid deletion for as long as you desire. An example of a name space is User:Metropolisforever/®. Just / and whatever the name of the article is after the backslash. Please read the guides that I provided for you. They will tell you these things. 17:55, 6 December 2006 (UTC)

Image:Pokemon1.jpg

Isn't animated child porn illegal?--Metropolisforever 13:36, 6 December 2006 (UTC)

I don't know. I don't take part in it nor do I search for it on here. And PLEASE, Don't add images the way that you do. Use the proper wiki code. The only images I tolerate are from templates. 17:55, 6 December 2006 (UTC)

How come...

we can't upload .bmp files?--Metropolisforever 14:14, 6 December 2006 (UTC)

Because the gods & goddess don't like them. Pay homage to their divine laws. 17:55, 6 December 2006 (UTC)

Nevermind, You're banned FOREVER. ^_^ 18:04, 6 December 2006 (UTC)

Why NOT?

He deleted/ huffed my entry???

Did you follow the guidelines set for you to create an article to a T? Plus, he's an administrator here & he can do that. 23:59, 6 December 2006 (UTC)

Re: Don't do that!

Do what?? --Tapiocapudding 00:55, 7 December 2006 (UTC)

Tapper Tamper with other user's pages. 00:59, 7 December 2006 (UTC)

Um, Tom? Didja mean tamper?   Sir Tooltroll, Esq. CUN • Eh? • Oh! • UnTunes! •• I my cat! 06:22, 7 December 2006 (UTC)

Yeah, I realized how I spelled it when I turned off the computer. Thanks for noticing my flaws. ^_^ 14:39, 7 December 2006 (UTC)

Tasty!

Goshzilla has given me a tasty ice cream cone! Mmmmmmmmm!

For welcoming me, comrade! --goshzillacorrespondence 02:22, 7 December 2006 (UTC)

thanks 02:27, 7 December 2006 (UTC)