User:Ryan Woo-Ming
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This user likes Super Mario.
This user is from California,
and brags about the nice weather.
After all, earthquakes aren't weather.
 | RANDOM WARNING! This article is quite random. You might want to edit it so that it's actually about something! |
“Tom Cruise revolts brick!”
“The more there is the less you see. What is it?”
“Be you ever so quick, with vision keen, by your eyes, we are never seen. Unless perchance it should come to pass, you see our reflection in a looking glass. What are we? FENCE JUMPER!!!”
“Slobodan Milošević ablates telephone!”
“Hands she has but does not hold, teeth she has but does not bite, feet she has but they are cold, eyes she has but without sight. Who is she?”
“OMG!1!”
“What gets wetter and wetter the more it dries? RAPE!!!”
“tralk ”
“owned”
“In Soviet Russia, US Navy F/A 18 Super Hornet oscillates YOU!!”
Here we see an image that is most likely completely unrelated to clones.
Click here to go to my Pee Review page.
What I do and don't speak[edit | edit source]
es G |
This user does not speak Español and believes it to be an embarrassment to language. Furthermore, this user desires the genocide of all Español speakers. |
ja 0 |
This user does not understand 日本語 (or understands it with considerable difficulties). |
MW 4 |
This user speaks MediaWiki at a near-native level. |
| typo-0 | This user does not understand Typo and hates people that speak it because they're all annoying foreigners. |
I am...[edit | edit source]
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This user does not have a user page at Wikipedia because they think that they take things way too seriously over there. |
♂ |
This user is a boy and is made of trucks, trains, and airplanes. |
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This user is right-handed. In Latin, they would be Dexter. |
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This user is adorable. |
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This user is a geek. |
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This user is a grue, and while you were reading this, has eaten you. Start over? |
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This user prefers to play games on a PC as anything else is too complex. |
My favorite foods and drinks[edit | edit source]
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This user has a fondness for Calamari. |
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Yes, I would like fries with that. |
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This user likes Jam. A lot. |
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This user eats M & M's. |
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This user loves pasta. |
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This user completely enjoys pie because it is awesome. |
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This user drinks so much milk, their bones can cut diamonds. |
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This user drinks water. |
My gaming interests and IQ[edit | edit source]
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This user is addicted to video games. |  |
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This user is a Gamer and therefore creepy. |
| DIFF E | This user plays Video Games on the lowest difficulty setting available as winning makes them feel good about themselves. |
| DIFF M | This user plays Video Games on the default difficulty setting as they simply aren't good enough. |
| LV-2 | This user considers themselves an intermediate gamer and so probably has some sort of social life. |
| LV-3 | This user considers themself an advanced gamer and so probably lost their job recently. |
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This user is winking at you because they think you have gold coins. Give them your gold coins, okay? |
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This user kicks butt at Tetяis: not that that's anything to be proud of. |
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This user is a Nintendo fan. |
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This user plays the Wii U and thought it was the “new controller”. Probably. |
What I use[edit | edit source]
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This user uses Windows because they can't get enough of your lover. |
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This user uses Google Chrome, because it's GOOGLE. |
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This user's primary source of artwork is MS Paint. |
My other interests[edit | edit source]
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This user was brought to you by the letters N, O and the number 69. |
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This user owns by one or more cats just so they can keep an eye on them. |
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This user owns one or more dogs as they need a cover for their stick fetish. |
XD |
This user is interested in comedy, and may enjoy writing or performing it. |
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This user can see what you don't! |
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This user is a swimmer. |
[edit | edit source]
| This article is likely to be eaten by a grue. I suggest you protect yourself or watch an episode of Grue's Clues, tonight right after The Loud House on Nickelodeon before it eats you too. |
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This user doesn't trust Wikipedia as far as they can throw it… but nonetheless use it on a daily basis. |
This user is from California,
and brags about the nice weather.
After all, earthquakes aren't weather.
Redundant[edit | edit source]
usbx |
This user likes to create userboxes. |
Color |
This user likes random colored userboxes. |
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This user likes to use redundant userboxes. |
Eeek! |
This user steals userboxes from random people's user pages. |
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This user is an idiot who steals userboxes. |
usbx |
This user likes to use userboxes. |
lots of |
This user has lots of userboxes. |
Irreverent[edit | edit source]
AAAA AAAA AAAAAA AAAAAAAAA! |
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This user's head A SPLODE. |
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This user is the random moist flatulence that employed their nipple inside of your t-shirts so you must chaotically hack, slash, & burn them with a LSD. |
cCbBaA |
.gnilleps drawkcab segaruocne resu sihT |
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This space for rent. |
| bu-0 | This user does not speak Bullet and may result in injury if does so. |
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Watch for Falling Rocks. |
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This user does not know how to shot web. |
INTERMISSION-THIS ARTICLE IS BORING!
The Free Imperial Republic of Stoner High School | |||
|---|---|---|---|
| |||
| Anthem: "Dudes of Stoner" | |||
| Capital | Student Union Building (SUB) | ||
| Official language(s) | English | ||
| Government | |||
| ‑ Head of State/Government | Her Majesty Queen Tiffany IV, Class of 2011 | ||
| Declaration of Independence | October 5th, 1980 | ||
| Currency | Extra Credit Point (EC#) | ||
| Religion | Georgianism and Alcoholism | ||
| Official substance | Kittens | ||
| GDP per capita | 14.3 million extra credit points ($1,986,111 USD) | ||
| Average GPA | 4.0 | ||
| Average BAC | 0.09 [1] | ||
| Average SAT | 2320 (new), 1337 (old) | ||
| Official animal | Palestinian Rat | ||
| Official vegetable | Cabbage | ||
| Official mineral | Petroleum | ||
| Official number | 420 | ||
“By far, de greatest schule in this great Schtate of Kuhllifornia.”
“At Stoner High School, students expel YOU!”
“DUDE! The drum solo from "In the Air Tonight" is FUCKING EPIC!”
Stoner High School (also known as "SHS", "Stoner High", "The ProcrastiNation", "The Stoner Imperium", or simply "Stoner") is an independent wholly student-pwned and operated high school in Fockersville, California. From a dark, tortured past, Stoner High School has emerged to become a shining beacon of hope, justice, and unrivaled fun for oppressed students worldwide. As feared by the educational bureaucracy as it is loved by that bureaucracy's victims, the school epitomizes the absolute perfection of the secondary school system in pretty much every way.[3] It is one of the largest and most successful high schools in the nation, thanks to its unique form of governance, libertarian economic and social policies, fearsome military and damn good beer. SHS's astoundingly high endowments of human and natural capital have also allowed it to project global military, economic and political power at a level befitting its de facto status as a modern industrial nation-state.[4] Further information is available via the links below.
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1. Home |
8. Geography |
References[edit | edit source]
- ↑ Though it appears low, this average reflects the BAC of all students at all times. Since it is an unfortunate reality that nearly all students are sober for at least several hours a day (particularly while unable to consume more alcohol as a result of being asleep), it must be considered that average BAC among awake students is higher than this figure, and BAC among students not in class is still higher. The distribution is decidedly skewed to the extreme ends of the spectrum, with the standard deviation of the BAC being approximately 0.69.
- ↑ For more quotes, please visit the quotes section.
- ↑ Focker, et al. (2006) A History of Stoner High School.
- ↑ CIA World Factbook, 2008 (classified edition).
Featured Article (read another featured article)
Featured version: 2 April 2008
This article has been featured on the front page. You can vote for or nominate your favourite articles at Uncyclopedia:VFH.
We now return to our regularly scheduled jokes, already in progress....
Zork Memories (The Zork Backstage Pass!!!)[edit | edit source]
Zork |
This user edits the Zork trilogy. |
My Trophies[edit | edit source]
Z |
This user has found the Twenty Treasures of Zork and beaten Zork: The Great Underground Empire. |
Z2 |
This user has united the Golden Egg of Arkora and beaten Zork 2: Gruel and Unusual Punishment. |
Z3 |
This user has saved the Beautiful Princess Rosemary and beaten Zork 3: The Dungeon Master. |
Recent changes to Zork 1[edit | edit source]
Recent changes to Zork 2[edit | edit source]
Recent changes to Zork 3[edit | edit source]
My other favorite featured articles from the 1st 10 years of Uncyclopedia, in chronological order[edit | edit source]
2005... (The year that started it all!)[edit | edit source]
- All Your Base Are Belong To Us/Example on wheels! (3/25/05)
- RTFM (3/28/05)
- Pong! the Movie (4/20/05)
- Lie (4/26/05)
- English-American Dictionary (5/19/05)
- The Oldest Trick in the Book (5/27/05)
- Idiotic Table of the Elements (6/2/05)
- Aesop's Fables (6/24/05)
- Greatest Inventions (6/30/05)
- Banned from the Internet (7/3/05)
- Banana Phone (7/23/05)
- Raccoon Tail v. Super Mario Cape (8/14/05)
- List of weapons that don't exist, but should (8/31/05)
- iPod Nano 200gb Instructions (9/29/05)
- Missing milk (10/2/05)
- Redundancy (10/11/05)
- Crimes inspired by video games (10/15/05)
- AAAAAAAAA! (10/21/05)
- -- --- .-. ... . / -.-. --- -.. . (10/29/05)
- Alternate Universes I Seriously Hope Do Not Actually Exist (10/31/05)
- IPod yocto (12/12/05)
2006... (The Golden Year of Uncyclopedia)[edit | edit source]
- Alternative medicine (1/1/06)
- Alliteration (1/8/06)
- VCR Manual (2/5/06)
- Writer's block (3/3/06)
- Do NOT click any links! (4/3/06)
- Insert title here (5/6/06)
- UnBooks:Adventure gamebook (6/7/06)
- Calvin and Hobbes (6/23/06)
- UnBooks:See Dick (6/29/06)
- Super Smash Bros.: Xtreme Beach Volleyball (7/3/06)
- Speech to text software (7/9/06)
- Grue (7/11/06)
- Command Line (7/17/06)
- Universal Remote Control Everything 3000 (7/25/06)
- Adobe Potatochop (8/2/06)
- Pixellated Face Disease (9/3/06)
- Lost in Translation (9/5/06)
- Disneyland (9/21/06)
- UnBooks:Horton Hires a Ho (10/14/06)
- Double Ristretto Venti Half-Soy Nonfat Decaf Organic Chocolate Brownie Iced Vanilla Double-Shot Gingerbread Frappuccino Extra Hot With Foam Whipped Cream Upside Down Double Blended, One Sweet'N Low and One Nutrasweet, and Ice (11/13/06)
- Total Fucking Asshole Server 2006 (11/27/06)
- Internet Movie Database (12/7/06)
- 001 (12/11/06)
- HowTo:Cheat At Scrabble (12/13/06)
- Garfield (12/22/06)
- IQ:Sample test (12/31/06)
2007... (The Other Golden Year of Uncyclopedia)[edit | edit source]
- My Journeys with the GPS (1/8/07)
- Me (1/15/07)
- AAA (1/26/07)
- List of one letter words starting with A (2/11/07)
- You Are Dead (2/13/07)
- Google Middle Earth (2/17/07)
- Movie Trailer Announcer Guy (3/4/07)
- HowTo:Cook While Drunk (3/6/07)
- HowTo:Cut Your Own Head Off With a Chainsaw (3/10/07)
- Dyslexia (3/14/07)
- Grue's Clues (3/24/07)
- Ye Olde Webbe Desyne Shoppe (4/3/07)
- Grand Theft Audio (5/15/07)
- A Visit with your Psychopathic Grandmother (7/3/07)
- UnBooks:Employee Manual (8/3/07)
- HowTo:Play Russian Roulette (8/5/07)
- UnGames:Pick Up the Phone Booth and Aisle (8/15/07)
- Blue Screen of Death (8/23/07)
- Why?:Remove Your Penis (9/3/07)
- UnScripts:Dora the Explorer: The Movie (9/12/07)
- Mental illness (10/8/07)
- UnScripts:Emergency Room (12/19/07)
- Why?:Stick Things in the Electrical Outlet (12/26/07)
2008... (The Pun Invasion et al. BEEP was also my favorite.)[edit | edit source]
- UnBooks:Life as a 4⅝ Year Old (2/25/08)
- Please delete this page (3/19/08)
- G Rated Talking Animal Movie (4/5/08)
- UnBooks:The Last Little Pig (4/7/08)
- The Daily Show (4/30/08)
- UnBooks:A Day In The Life Of A Redirect (7/10/08)
- UnScripts:Genesis, Episode II: In the Garden of Eden (7/31/08)
- UnBooks:Beep (8/10/08)
- Playstation 4 (8/17/08)
- UnBooks:Captain's Blog (8/27/08)
- The Pun Invasion of Uncyclopedia (9/11/08)
- HowTo:Drive a train (9/16/08)
- The Incredible Adventures of MS PAINTMAN! (9/19/08)
- Are you colour-blind? (9/24/08)
- UnBooks:An Uncyc Ban Diary (10/13/08)
- Michael Bay (11/13/08)
2009... (The Microsoft Knowledge Base article's funny here.)[edit | edit source]
- Billy Mays (1/22/09)
- Elevator (2/13/09)
- Drill sergeant (3/26/09)
- Trogdor the Burninator (4/21/09)
- History of Google (5/6/09)
- HowTo:Build the Perfect Sandcastle (5/7/09)
- UnBooks:Great Abridged Pop Songs (6/24/09)
- LazyTown (7/16/09)
- Yellow (8/1/09)
- UnScripts:Star Wars (2010) (8/17/09)
- UnScripts:Pixar: An Introduction for Uncyclopedians (8/30/09)
- The Asylum-Seeker's Guide to Visiting McDonald's (10/12/09)
- Samuel L. Vacuum (10/13/09)
- Microsoft Knowledge Base (11/25/09)
- UnBooks:Gone Fishing (11/29/09)
- The Pirate Bay (11/30/09)
- Your estimate of how long to reheat the lasagna (12/25/09)
2010... (I'd call this the Dark Age except for Chatroulette and these other articles.)[edit | edit source]
- HowTo:Handle Flashing Your Vagina in Public (2/28/10)
- Lateral thinking puzzle (3/16/10)
- McDonland (3/17/10)
- A wizard did it (4/28/10)
- You're Screwed (5/2/10)
- Chatroulette (5/14/10)
- Hello there! I'm a kite, and I will ruin your day! (6/18/10)
- HowTo:Survive the Titanic (7/11/10)
- Traffic sign (8/6/10)
2011... (The return to true Uncyclopedia humor even for the 2012 phenomenon...)[edit | edit source]
- God's answering service (1/13/11)
- UnBooks:Let's take a walk in the city! (1/30/11)
- Blockbuster (2/14/11)
- BabyTV (2/20/11)
- Why?:Categorise pages (4/22/11)
- Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying, Sit Down and Relax for a Bit, Try and Read or Something, Maybe Eat a Cheese Sandwich, and Basically Do Anything Other Than Obsessively Think About Being Obliterated in a Massive Nuclear Explosion (4/23/11)
- Milton Babbitt (4/26/11)
- 2012 phenomenon (5/31/11)
- Ice cream truck (6/16/11)
- Visual puns (6/23/11)
- Inbox (7/3/11)
- Hypnotist (7/15/11)
- Unobtanium (8/12/11)
- Why?:IPs can't edit the main page (8/16/11)
- Negative potato (8/17/11)
- UnTunes:Uncyclopedia Didn't Start The Fire (9/22/11)
- Subliminal stimuli (10/3/11)
- Pac-Man (walkthrough) (10/25/11)
- HowTo:Milk a Cow (11/6/11)
2012... (Another pretty crappy year.)[edit | edit source]
- UnBooks:My Tedious Day (1/13/12)
- God's userpage (2/19/12)
- UnReviews:Milk (4/14/12)
- 0.999... (7/4/12)
- Twitter (8/23/12)
- Snips, snails and puppy dog tails (8/28/12)
- Disney (9/4/12)
- Why?:Your cat died (12/13/12)
2013... (The year when Uncyclopedia moved away from Wikia for the 1st time.)[edit | edit source]
- I want a cookie (1/17/13)
- Get-rich-quick scheme (4/2/13)
- Snakes on a Plane (4/12/13)
- Don't judge a book by its cover (4/29/13)
- 9-11 according to a 5 year old (7/4/13)
- HowTo:Wash the Dishes (7/10/13)
- Katy Perry Hit Generator (7/28/13)
- Constitution of the United States (actual text) (9/4/13)
- Why?:Revert the administrators (9/10/13)
- You don't want to know (9/17/13)
- Cafeteria food (9/20/13)
- Vader v. Vader (9/21/13)
- Twm (10/17/13)
- Why?:My homework was late (11/15/13)
- Page title (11/30/13)
- HowTo:Know if you're right brained or left brained (12/5/13)
- Homework (12/16/13)
2014... (The last best year of Uncyclopedia humor.)[edit | edit source]
- UnBooks:My school day (1/15/14)
- Content-free (1/19/14)
- The Speck of Dust Next to My Keyboard (2/2/14)
- This is not an article (4/26/14)
- Why?:We Can't Have Nice Things (5/16/14)
- Bread machine (6/13/14)
- F4 (8/19/14)
- UnDebate:What does the fox say? (8/26/14)
- HowTo:Repair a broken smartphone (8/31/14)
Categories:
- Featured
- Stoner High School
- Liberation and Freedom
- Things that are too cool for school, but are, paradoxically, a part of a school
- FA Education
- High School
- Random
- User en
- User enr
- User es
- User ja
- User MW
- User Typo
- Male Uncyclopedians
- Right Handed Uncyclopedians
- Uncyclopedians who are adorable
- Geek Uncyclopedians
- Grue Uncyclopedians
- American Uncyclopedians
- Uncyclopedians who love Jam
- Uncyclopedians who love Pie
- Thems what will work for food
- Uncyclopedians who use Windows
- Uncyclopedians who use Google Chrome
- Uncyclopedians who know where their Towel is
- Uncyclopedians from California
- Idiots
- Uncyclopedians who steal userboxes
- User bu
- Uncyclopedians with Shuvels
- Zork Editors