User:Ryan Woo-Ming

“fortes fortuna adiuvat”

– the Anti-Grue on chili prawns

“What do you use to hoe a row, slay a foe, and wring with woe?”

– Donphan on Lauren Ryan

“HELLFUCKER”

– a Nathrezim on livers and onions

“What's brown and sounds like a bell? DAMMIT!!!”

– jellyfish on Shannon Penman

“A banker will lend you money only if you can prove you don't need it.”

– Oscar Wilde on lasagnas

“The man who made it doesn't want it. The man who bought it doesn't need it. The man who needs it doesn't know it. What is it?”

– Oscar Wilde on Kathleen Tomkins

“CRAPMUNCHER”

– Oscar Wilde on lemons

“What has a bottom at the top? SHIT!!!”

– Oscar Wilde on shiv

“Oscar Wilde”

– Oscar Wilde on Oscar Wilde

“smellier”

– yotz on orange juice

“lolls”

– Oscar Wilde on bronze medal

“In Soviet Russia, watermelon cruises YOU!!”

– Russian reversal on Black Jesus

Behold the random image! IF YOU DARE!

Here we see an image that is most likely completely unrelated to Stewie Griffin.

Click here to go to my Pee Review page.

What I do and don't speak

en N

This user is a native speaker of English.

en N

enr N

This user is a native speaker of Engrish.

enr N

es G

This user does not speak Español and believes it to be an embarrassment to language. Furthermore, this user desires the genocide of all Español speakers.

es G

ja 0

This user does not understand 日本語 (or understands it with considerable difficulties).

ja 0

MW 4

This user speaks MediaWiki at a near-native level.

MW 4

typo-0

This user does not understand Typo and hates people that speak it because they're all annoying foreigners.

1337

This user wishes they were elite.

1337

I am...

This user does not have a user page at Wikipedia because they think that they take things way too seriously over there.

18+

This user is an adult, and thus may or may not know what fun is.

18+

♂

This user is a boy and is made of trucks, trains, and airplanes.

♂

This user is right-handed. In Latin, they would be Dexter.

This user is adorable.

This user is a geek.

This user is a grue, and while you were reading this, has eaten you. Start over?

This user is American …and unabashedly proud of it! (List of American Uncyclopedians)

This user prefers to play games on a PC as anything else is too complex.

My favorite foods and drinks

This user has a fondness for Calamari.

Yes, I would like fries with that.

This user likes Jam. A lot.

This user eats M & M's.

This user loves pasta.

This user completely enjoys pie because it is awesome.

This user drinks so much milk, their bones can cut diamonds.

This user drinks water.

I will work for food.

My gaming interests and IQ

This user is a Gamer and therefore creepy.

DIFF E

This user plays Video Games on the lowest difficulty setting available as winning makes them feel good about themselves.

DIFF M

This user plays Video Games on the default difficulty setting as they simply aren't good enough.

LV-1	This user considers themselves a n00b gamer and so probably doesn't know what 'noob' means.

LV-2	This user considers themselves an intermediate gamer and so probably has some sort of social life.

LV-3	This user considers themself an advanced gamer and so probably lost their job recently.

This user likes Super Mario.

This user is winking at you because they think you have gold coins. Give them your gold coins, okay?

This user kicks butt at Tetяis: not that that's anything to be proud of.

This user is a Nintendo fan.

This user plays the Wii U and thought it was the “new controller”. Probably.

What I use

This user uses Windows because they can't get enough of your lover.

This user uses Google Chrome, because it's Google.

This user's primary source of artwork is MS Paint.

My other interests

This user was brought to you by the letters XXX and the number 1.

This user owns by one or more cats just so they can keep an eye on them.

This user owns one or more dogs as they need a cover for their stick fetish.

XD

This user is interested in comedy, and may enjoy writing or performing it.

XD

This user can see what you don't!

This user is a swimmer.

Other stuff related to me

This user knows the answer to Life, the Universe, and Everything.

This user doesn't trust Wikipedia as far as they can throw it… but nonetheless use it on a daily basis.

This user is from California,


and brags about the nice weather.


After all, earthquakes aren't weather.

Redundant

usbx

This user likes to create userboxes.

usbx

Color

This user likes random colored userboxes.

Color

This user likes to use redundant userboxes.

Eeek!

This user steals userboxes from random people's user pages.

Eeek!

!

This user is an idiot who steals userboxes.

!

usbx

This user likes to use userboxes.

usbx

lots of

This user has lots of userboxes.

lots of

Irreverent

AAAAAAAAA!

AAAA AAAA AAAAAA AAAAAAAAA!

AAAAAAAAA!

This user's head A SPLODE.

This user is the random charming dictator that rinsed their mouth inside of your nuclear reactors so you must hoarsely urinate them with a tire.

cCbBaA

.gnilleps drawkcab segaruocne resu sihT

cCbBaA

—

This space for rent.

—

bu-0	This user does not speak Bullet and may result in injury if does so.

This user does not know how to shot web.

This user gots a shovel. Yes they does.

INTERMISSION-THIS ARTICLE IS BORING!

Typical Scientist explaining Newton's Laws of Gravity..

Newtonian physics was invented by Sir Isaac Newton (who later referred to himself as "I suck" Newton). His parents were hippies and thought that it would be "cool" to spell his name with two a's. In a backlash against his parents laid back 'things just happen man, go with the flow' attitude, Newton invented physics. He used something called force (which his parents were against, because everything should be free man) and action (not as in 'sex' action, which his parents were all for man) to explain the fundamentals of how things work in the universe. This seriously pissed off hippies everywhere because all of a sudden life wasn't about freedom or free love, it was about all the things the hippies were rebelling against - stuff forcing other stuff to do stuff, total bummer man.

Newton invented three laws that essentially explained how things move (because they are forced). His most famous law says that for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. This definitely explains why people stopped having sex after physics was invented. It used to be: to every action there is an equal and opposite action that is the same. For example every man that wanted sex (action) there was an equal and opposite man (woman) that wanted the same thing. However thanks to Newton's most famous law, the situation is now: for every man that wants sex (action) there is an equal and opposite man (woman) that doesn't want sex (unless force is applied).

Introduction

Newtonian mechanics is the original version of physics, however it now comes in 12 varieties of cheese flavours. Sir Isaac Newton noticed people were being killed by apples which were falling in every direction, so he invented gravity to combat this deadly tree. After the invention of gravity apples now fall down, which still saves lives today. The only drawback of Newton's invention of gravity is falling anvils. Soon, Issac made a book that held the recipies for the 12 cheeses.

He also invented three laws that describe forces and motion in ways that disagree with hippies.

While Newton chose to present his work on physics in classical interpretive dance for acceptance, much of the work students are exposed to now-a-days is based on the calculus of infinitesimals. Infinitesimals are really fricken small, like infinity but opposite. Like virus particles they infect the brains of students and kill their love of mathematics - A love everyone is born with.

Background: Calculus

Newtown used calculus of infinitesimals (invented by some French guy who Newton killed in a bar fight) to express his invention of gravity and Newton's three laws. More specifically he employed Really Hard Calculus, however the basics of Hand Waving Calculus can be used to obtain a pass for most students.

Recipie:

1. Take $x_{i}$ where $i$ ranges over all possible values.

2. Infintesimalise $x_{i}$, that is, dice very finely with a sharp knife. It should be done such that $x_{i}$ is of no finite size.

3. Take one $\sum$ and mix with the infintesimalised $x_{i}$'s.

4. Leave for 5 minutes or until the sum $\sum x_{i}$ becomes the integral $\int {x_{i}}$.

5. Apply to Physics, Mathematics, Chemistry and Gardening as required.

Students should be sure that they can master infintesimals before moving onto Newtonian Physics, it is not an easy journey. Zeno likens it to walking between two objects: First walk half way, then walk half way of the remaining distance. Repeat infinitely many times. If you are a mathematician you will go insane, if you are a true physicist you will get half way and say "close enough". Survivors of this test are physicists and are ready to study the art form of fudging, otherwise known as 'approximation' or physics.

Newton's Three Laws

Newton invented the three laws of motion (as in sex motion... uh!) to describe how bodies interact in a very dry and unsexual style. Physicists come to really appreciate Newton's law of motion once their sex drive dries up and they stop dreaming about bodies interacting in a free love kind of way.

Newton's First Law of Motion:

Every object of desire in a state of uniform attractiveness tends to remain in that state of unattainability until an external force is applied to it. This can include, but is not limited to: Becoming rich, getting a face lift or becoming a backstreet boy.

This was totally ripped off from Galileo's concept of unattainability, and this is often referred to as the "Law of you only attract people from the same attractiveness scale unless force is applied".

Any object that comes in contact with Noel Coward continues to move, forever.

Newton's Second Law of Motion:

The relationship between an object's mass m, its attractiveness a, and the force that is needed to be applied in order to score with them, F is $F=ma$. Attractiveness and force can change over time and influence each other, mass however can only be changed by eating right and may not influence attractiveness or force, in cases like that, mass is viewed as a constant or having a 'dog head'.

This is the most powerful of Newton's three Laws, because it allows people to understand if they are ever going to get it on with someone hot (without the influence of drugs and free love now that the 70s are over).

Before the 70s it was visual attractiveness, $v$ and not attractiveness that determined who was getting laid. Aristotle was always getting into visually attractive people for a bit of action, without considering the role of frictional forces (like being a dickhead). Thanks to Newton, personality counts. This has helped many scientists get laid.

The relationship between a roundhouse kick and an object correspond with the will of Noel Coward

Recent researches have lead to a new formulae which has its importance in modern physics and eventually, adds a whole new set of actions in Newtonian Physics. Here you go: $F=pie.a$ This formulae states that for a force applied on a student, a $F=pie.a$ must be considered where $pie$ is the constant for homeworks to be done and $a$ the value of the quantity of homework given. This formulae is actually very well known in some part of the world where science and physics are revolutioning lives of some dozen students of the HSE level.

Newton's Third Law of Motion:

There is no force equal to a Noel Coward roundhouse kick.

This law is exemplified by what happens if you crack onto (action) a hot person before considering the ugly friend. You get left with the ugly friend and before you know it you are left face down in a gimp outfit screaming you're sorry for all the guys/ gals that didn't take them to the school dance (opposite reaction to what you wanted).

Newton's Law of Gravity

What goes up must come down.

Put simply, the forumla and equation for this is

$\int _{S}T_{i}^{(n)}dS+\int _{V}F_{i}dV=\int _{V}\rho {\frac {dv_{i}}{dt}}\,dV$

By definition the stress vector of gravity is $\ T_{i}^{(n)}=\sigma _{ij}n_{j}$, then

$\int _{S}\sigma _{ij}n_{j}\,dS+\int _{V}F_{i}\,dV=\int _{V}\rho {\frac {dv_{i}}{dt}}\,dV$

Using the Divergence theorem to convert a surface integral to a volume integral gives to downward force of mass.

$\int _{V}\sigma _{ij,j}\,dV+\int _{V}F_{i}\,dV=\int _{V}\rho {\frac {dv_{i}}{dt}}\,dV$

For an arbitrary volume the integrand itself must be zero, and we have the momentum equation.

$\sigma _{ij,j}+F_{i}=\rho {\frac {dv_{i}}{dt}}$

If a system is in equilibrium, the change in momentum with respect to time is equal to 0, as there is no acceleration or loss of mass.

$\sum {\mathbf {F} }={\mathrm {d} \mathbf {P} \over \mathrm {d} t}=\ M\mathbf {a} _{cm}=0$

This is further explained in the Isaac Newton page of uncyclopedia.

Corrections to Newtonian Mechanics

Newton's theory of motion still couldn't explain the motion of really, really small objects (like if there is a guy with a small penis, his father must have had a small penis and somehow got laid? How did that happen?). Physicists discovered that this all has to do with taste, and so Quantum Cheddardynamics was invented to describe the behavior of really, really small things. Quantum Cheddardynamics is the physical theory describing the fundamental flavours and methods via which The 12 Fundamental Cheeses and 3 Noble Cheeses interact with and manipulate upon the universe (taken from Quantum Cheddardynamics). As the saying goes: "It's not how big it is, but how you taste it".

In fact

$F_{really\ small\ object}=m_{fundamentalcheese}$ x $\hbar$ x $t$

where $\hbar$ is Plank's Constant: the amount of cheese one can balance on a plank of wood before the plank begins to taste really good, and $t$ = taste.

As objects get smaller and smaller, interactions are no longer influenced by attractiveness or mass, but by taste and the mass of the fundamental cheese the object consists of. This explains how slugs get it on, because they are Ug-Leeeeeeeeeeee! They are however made completely of Brie which is really, really tasty.

Einstein's Corrections

Einstein came up with the formula:

$E=\hbar \nu$

to correct Newtonian Physics. This was a major breakthrough which explained the 'sleaze anomaly'. The sleaze anomaly was not supported by Newtonian physics, as a sleaze has nothing to offer anyone, and their persistence in trying to score is downright annoying. Einstein's formula says the energy, $E$, one must input in order to score is directly proportional to the frequency $\nu$ of attempts. This is why sleazes get action despite Newton's third law.

Note of course, that this is for Quantum objects (small willies ladies!!!) so never ever go with a sleaze no matter how long it's been!

Laws of Graduation

Newton is also famous for his three laws of graduation.

1. A grad student in procrastination tends to stay in procrastination unless an external force is applied to it.[1]
2. The age, 'a', of a doctoral process is directly proportional to the flexibility, 'f', given by the adviser and inversely proportional to the student's motivation, 'm'. [2]
3. For every action towards graduation there is an equal and opposite distraction. [3]

See also

• Isaac Newton
• Calculus
• Quantum Cheddardynamics
• 12 Fundamental Cheeses
• Newton's Laws of Motion
  We now return to our regularly scheduled jokes, already in progress....

Zork Memories (The Zork Backstage Pass!!!)

Zork

This user edits the Zork trilogy.

Zork

My Trophies

Z

This user has found the Twenty Treasures of Zork and beaten Zork: The Great Underground Empire.

Z

Z2

This user has united the Golden Egg of Arkora and beaten Zork 2: Gruel and Unusual Punishment.

Z2

Z3

This user has saved the Beautiful Princess Rosemary and beaten Zork 3: The Dungeon Master.

Z3

Recent changes to Zork 1

Topic	Last Edit	Last Author
Zork/DeBeerWindowExit	03:38, 19 November 2025	OPOSSUM
Zork Abridged	22:38, 13 November 2025	Gergdown
Zork/xyzzy	16:10, 16 September 2025	Alula
Zork	06:10, 19 June 2025	TheCriticalGeneral
Zork/heaven/gate	21:11, 1 June 2025	CartoonosaurusRex
Wizards of Power MMORPG	15:42, 27 May 2025	Fenris2010
Zork3/win!!!	12:46, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork/vs.thepenquincheat1	12:45, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/fre56srgtr7	12:45, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/revolution	12:23, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork/codemastervshercII	11:43, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork/ladder21	11:39, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork/ladder18	11:39, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork/ladder11	11:39, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork/ladder19	11:38, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork/ladder15	11:38, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork/ladder13	11:38, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork/ladder12	11:38, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork/Glitch city 2/Exit	11:21, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
UnVerse/road2	09:55, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork2/grue	01:47, 7 January 2025	65.92.68.131
Zork/Underworld666	00:47, 29 December 2024	DaniPine3
UnVerse/superstitioustownxyzzy	02:44, 1 August 2024	Fenris2010
UnVerse/Ur-Grue6	02:34, 1 August 2024	Fenris2010
UnVerse/Ur-Grue5	20:41, 31 July 2024	Fenris2010
UnVerse/Ur-Grue4	20:38, 31 July 2024	Fenris2010
UnVerse/Ur-Grue3	17:14, 29 July 2024	Fenris2010
UnVerse/Ur-Grue2	02:43, 29 July 2024	Fenris2010
UnVerse/Ur-Grue1	01:24, 28 July 2024	Fenris2010
UnVerse/repeat	21:04, 27 July 2024	Fenris2010
UnVerse/Ur-Gruego	21:03, 27 July 2024	Fenris2010
UnVerse/Ur-Gruexyzzy	01:13, 27 July 2024	Fenris2010
UnVerse/Ur-Grueoldman	01:05, 27 July 2024	Fenris2010
UnVerse/Ur-Gruequest	00:11, 26 July 2024	Fenris2010
UnVerse/Ur-Gruegun	23:57, 25 July 2024	Fenris2010
UnVerse/Zorkyard	01:14, 25 July 2024	Fenris2010
UnVerse/zorknorth	23:25, 24 July 2024	Fenris2010
UnVerse/Ur-Grue	03:08, 24 July 2024	Fenris2010
UnVerse/zorkgruestats	03:03, 24 July 2024	Fenris2010
UnVerse/zorkcomplain	17:41, 23 July 2024	Fenris2010
UnVerse/vortexcastle	00:36, 22 July 2024	Fenris2010
UnVerse/vortex	22:03, 21 July 2024	Fenris2010
UnVerse/terminator rex/inventory	21:03, 14 July 2024	Fenris2010
UnVerse/terminator rex	20:59, 14 July 2024	Fenris2010
UnVerse/pvparena	20:46, 14 July 2024	Fenris2010
UnVerse/sovietrussia	22:32, 13 July 2024	Fenris2010
Zork/loser	16:43, 29 February 2024	Grapehater
Zork/Statiogrue	15:37, 20 February 2024	Grapehater
Zork/finalbattleattack1	01:34, 16 June 2023	2601:681:5A00:EF30:F853:EB65:2A8B:776C
Zork/lab7	01:47, 6 January 2023	Ryan Woo-Ming

Recent changes to Zork 2

Topic	Last Edit	Last Author
Zork2/CH2Bates/mechabattle1 5	16:20, 15 October 2025	Turb0-Sunrise
Zork2/CH3gruefeciologist	19:59, 17 September 2025	Alula
Zork2	22:41, 29 September 2024	Fenris2010
Zork2/CH1voldemort/earlyfight6 1	01:32, 16 June 2023	2601:681:5A00:EF30:F853:EB65:2A8B:776C
Zork2/CH4gruebot/maze36	00:58, 11 January 2023	Ryan Woo-Ming
Zork2/CH4XSlose	23:45, 10 January 2023	Ryan Woo-Ming
Zork2/zetournament/junior1 1	14:28, 19 November 2022	2600:4040:12DC:FF00:9972:C590:E6BC:22C4
Zork2/restoresecret	02:50, 13 August 2022	Username
Zork2/restore3	02:47, 13 August 2022	Username
Zork2/restore2	02:47, 13 August 2022	Username
Zork2/restore	02:47, 13 August 2022	Username
Zork2/win!!!	02:47, 13 August 2022	Username
Zork2/Win???	02:45, 13 August 2022	Username
Zork2/432583298902	00:27, 24 August 2021	DeletedUser51be906d
Zork2/Buttonagain	00:27, 24 August 2021	DeletedUser51be906d
Zork2/CH3oprah/alliance10	00:27, 24 August 2021	DeletedUser51be906d
Zork2/CH4conclusion	00:27, 24 August 2021	DeletedUser51be906d
Zork2/maze55/rutabega/salmon/safety	00:26, 24 August 2021	DeletedUser51be906d
Zork2/4maze89	00:53, 10 December 2020	70.171.111.82
Zork2/CH4library	21:01, 12 November 2020	EzekielMartin
Zork2/CH3FARK	16:05, 5 September 2020	Gale5050
Zork2/A protal to get the hell out of hell	22:25, 3 September 2020	Zombiebaron
Zork2/231546745856	10:58, 29 August 2020	118.10.82.175
Zork2/A piece of pie	11:12, 26 August 2020	118.10.82.175
Zork2/4maze97	15:52, 24 August 2020	Whytheonlyone
Zork2/454616237432	20:40, 9 August 2020	Whytheonlyone
Zork2/454616259782	20:40, 9 August 2020	Whytheonlyone
Zork2/454650987432	20:40, 9 August 2020	Whytheonlyone
Zork2/4maze69	20:40, 9 August 2020	Whytheonlyone
Zork2/4maze79	20:39, 9 August 2020	Whytheonlyone
Zork2/4maze88	20:39, 9 August 2020	Whytheonlyone
Zork2/A piece of cake	09:02, 27 June 2020	Dexter111344
Zork2/CH3oprah/alliance42	09:02, 27 June 2020	Dexter111344
Zork2/CH4gruebot/maze69	09:02, 27 June 2020	Dexter111344
Zork2/CH4gruebot/maze77	09:01, 27 June 2020	Dexter111344
Zork2/locked	09:01, 27 June 2020	Dexter111344
Zork2/Put the brush back on the ground where you found it	09:01, 27 June 2020	Dexter111344
Zork2/1cheat/Angerthewalrus	09:01, 27 June 2020	Dexter111344
Zork2/maze34	22:20, 4 April 2020	99.149.232.31
Zork2/CH4voldemort/dodge	16:07, 27 June 2019	174.223.131.218
Zork2/morezorkception	03:06, 20 June 2019	Zdrmonster128
Zork2/test1wrong2	17:30, 2 March 2018	209.221.91.250
Zork2/GrueSlayerBattle1 2	15:52, 11 February 2014	209.221.90.250
Zork2/slayerdeath	19:41, 7 May 2013	174.138.212.172
Zork2/GrueSlayerBattle2 1	19:39, 7 May 2013	174.138.212.172
Zork2/geteaten	19:37, 7 May 2013	174.138.212.172
Zork2/GrueSlayerBattle1 3	19:36, 7 May 2013	174.138.212.172
Zork2/CH2Bates/secfight2 7	06:12, 7 February 2013	MadMax
Zork2/xyzzy	15:33, 2 December 2012	198.91.203.145
Zork2/CH3oprah/alliance24/materia	04:44, 30 September 2012	98.237.141.25

Recent changes to Zork 3

Topic	Last Edit	Last Author
Zork3/Crinjas	12:46, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/therapist3	12:45, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/cloudfight4	12:45, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/Fuckgarmmar	12:45, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/Higher2	12:45, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/dark2	12:45, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/walrus	12:45, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/cheesecake7	12:45, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/ekaceseehc on	12:45, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/cheesecake2	12:45, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/admineatgrues	12:45, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/??????????????	12:45, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/To bad	12:45, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/?????	12:45, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/down	12:45, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/gruewsc	12:45, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/gruehellfr	12:45, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/Gruehellfr	12:45, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/gruesarcasm	12:45, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/sumchuck	12:44, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/cloudfight123	12:44, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/Ur-GrueFight5 5 5 3	12:44, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/Ur-Grue/GrueSlayer2 3 2	12:44, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/cloudloss	12:44, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/cloudfight121	12:44, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/cloudfight2	12:44, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/cloudfight5	12:44, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/Die	12:44, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/File 3	12:44, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/File 2	12:44, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/killedmjrocket	12:44, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/SecretEnding Floodaga	12:44, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/Ur-Grue/GrueSlayer2 3 7	12:44, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/SecretEnding Thundaga	12:44, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/ShootDeath	12:44, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/DeathMoney	12:44, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/chickens are cool!	12:44, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/AdventureToilet5 5 2	12:44, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/uselight	12:44, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/killmenow	12:44, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/hobo	12:44, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/SecretEnding RunAway	12:43, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/activus/paleguy	12:43, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/activus/thinguy	12:43, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/Secrettoilet3	12:43, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/activus/fatwoman	12:43, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/Secrettoilet4	12:43, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/SecretEnding Blizzaga	12:43, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/SecretEnding PowerUp!	12:43, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r
Zork3/activuscastle1	12:43, 2 April 2025	L10nM4st3r

My other favorite featured articles from the 1st 10 years of Uncyclopedia, in chronological order

2005... (The year that started it all!)

• All Your Base Are Belong To Us/Example on wheels! (3/25/05)
• RTFM (3/28/05)
• Pong! the Movie (4/20/05)
• Lie (4/26/05)
• English-American Dictionary (5/19/05)
• The Oldest Trick in the Book (5/27/05)
• Idiotic Table of the Elements (6/2/05)
• Aesop's Fables (6/24/05)
• Greatest Inventions (6/30/05)
• Banned from the Internet (7/3/05)
• Banana Phone (7/23/05)
• Raccoon Tail v. Super Mario Cape (8/14/05)
• List of weapons that don't exist, but should (8/31/05)
• iPod Nano 200gb Instructions (9/29/05)
• Missing milk (10/2/05)
• Redundancy (10/11/05)
• Crimes inspired by video games (10/15/05)
• AAAAAAAAA! (10/21/05)
• -- --- .-. ... . / -.-. --- -.. . (10/29/05)
• Alternate Universes I Seriously Hope Do Not Actually Exist (10/31/05)
• IPod yocto (12/12/05)

2006... (The Golden Year of Uncyclopedia)

• Alternative medicine (1/1/06)
• Alliteration (1/8/06)
• VCR Manual (2/5/06)
• Writer's block (3/3/06)
• Do NOT click any links! (4/3/06)
• Insert title here (5/6/06)
• UnBooks:Adventure gamebook (6/7/06)
• Calvin and Hobbes (6/23/06)
• UnBooks:See Dick (6/29/06)
• Super Smash Bros.: Xtreme Beach Volleyball (7/3/06)
• Speech to text software (7/9/06)
• Grue (7/11/06)
• Command Line (7/17/06)
• Universal Remote Control Everything 3000 (7/25/06)
• Adobe Potatochop (8/2/06)
• Pixellated Face Disease (9/3/06)
• Lost in Translation (9/5/06)
• Disneyland (9/21/06)
• UnBooks:Horton Hires a Ho (10/14/06)
• Double Ristretto Venti Half-Soy Nonfat Decaf Organic Chocolate Brownie Iced Vanilla Double-Shot Gingerbread Frappuccino Extra Hot With Foam Whipped Cream Upside Down Double Blended, One Sweet'N Low and One Nutrasweet, and Ice (11/13/06)
• Total Fucking Asshole Server 2006 (11/27/06)
• Internet Movie Database (12/7/06)
• 001 (12/11/06)
• HowTo:Cheat At Scrabble (12/13/06)
• Garfield (12/22/06)
• IQ:Sample test (12/31/06)

2007... (The Other Golden Year of Uncyclopedia)

• My Journeys with the GPS (1/8/07)
• Me (1/15/07)
• AAA (1/26/07)
• List of one letter words starting with A (2/11/07)
• You Are Dead (2/13/07)
• Google Middle Earth (2/17/07)
• Movie Trailer Announcer Guy (3/4/07)
• HowTo:Cook While Drunk (3/6/07)
• HowTo:Cut Your Own Head Off With a Chainsaw (3/10/07)
• Dyslexia (3/14/07)
• Grue's Clues (3/24/07)
• Ye Olde Webbe Desyne Shoppe (4/3/07)
• Grand Theft Audio (5/15/07)
• A Visit with your Psychopathic Grandmother (7/3/07)
• UnBooks:Employee Manual (8/3/07)
• HowTo:Play Russian Roulette (8/5/07)
• UnGames:Pick Up the Phone Booth and Aisle (8/15/07)
• Blue Screen of Death (8/23/07)
• Why?:Remove Your Penis (9/3/07)
• UnScripts:Dora the Explorer: The Movie (9/12/07)
• Mental illness (10/8/07)
• UnScripts:Emergency Room (12/19/07)
• Why?:Stick Things in the Electrical Outlet (12/26/07)

2008... (The Pun Invasion et al. BEEP was also my favorite.)

• UnBooks:Life as a 4⅝ Year Old (2/25/08)
• Please delete this page (3/19/08)
• G Rated Talking Animal Movie (4/5/08)
• UnBooks:The Last Little Pig (4/7/08)
• The Daily Show (4/30/08)
• UnBooks:A Day In The Life Of A Redirect (7/10/08)
• UnScripts:Genesis, Episode II: In the Garden of Eden (7/31/08)
• UnBooks:Beep (8/10/08)
• Playstation 4 (8/17/08)
• UnBooks:Captain's Blog (8/27/08)
• The Pun Invasion of Uncyclopedia (9/11/08)
• HowTo:Drive a train (9/16/08)
• The Incredible Adventures of MS PAINTMAN! (9/19/08)
• Are you colour-blind? (9/24/08)
• UnBooks:An Uncyc Ban Diary (10/13/08)
• Michael Bay (11/13/08)

2009... (The Microsoft Knowledge Base article's funny here.)

• Billy Mays (1/22/09)
• Elevator (2/13/09)
• Drill sergeant (3/26/09)
• Trogdor the Burninator (4/21/09)
• History of Google (5/6/09)
• HowTo:Build the Perfect Sandcastle (5/7/09)
• UnBooks:Great Abridged Pop Songs (6/24/09)
• LazyTown (7/16/09)
• Yellow (8/1/09)
• UnScripts:Star Wars (2010) (8/17/09)
• UnScripts:Pixar: An Introduction for Uncyclopedians (8/30/09)
• The Asylum-Seeker's Guide to Visiting McDonald's (10/12/09)
• Samuel L. Vacuum (10/13/09)
• Microsoft Knowledge Base (11/25/09)
• UnBooks:Gone Fishing (11/29/09)
• The Pirate Bay (11/30/09)
• Your estimate of how long to reheat the lasagna (12/25/09)

2010... (I'd call this the Dark Age except for Chatroulette and these other articles.)

• HowTo:Handle Flashing Your Vagina in Public (2/28/10)
• Lateral thinking puzzle (3/16/10)
• McDonland (3/17/10)
• A wizard did it (4/28/10)
• You're Screwed (5/2/10)
• Chatroulette (5/14/10)
• Hello there! I'm a kite, and I will ruin your day! (6/18/10)
• HowTo:Survive the Titanic (7/11/10)
• Traffic sign (8/6/10)

2011... (The return to true Uncyclopedia humor even for the 2012 phenomenon...)

• God's answering service (1/13/11)
• UnBooks:Let's take a walk in the city! (1/30/11)
• Blockbuster (2/14/11)
• BabyTV (2/20/11)
• Why?:Categorise pages (4/22/11)
• Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying, Sit Down and Relax for a Bit, Try and Read or Something, Maybe Eat a Cheese Sandwich, and Basically Do Anything Other Than Obsessively Think About Being Obliterated in a Massive Nuclear Explosion (4/23/11)
• Milton Babbitt (4/26/11)
• 2012 phenomenon (5/31/11)
• Ice cream truck (6/16/11)
• Visual puns (6/23/11)
• Inbox (7/3/11)
• Hypnotist (7/15/11)
• Unobtanium (8/12/11)
• Why?:IPs can't edit the main page (8/16/11)
• Negative potato (8/17/11)
• UnTunes:Uncyclopedia Didn't Start The Fire (9/22/11)
• Subliminal stimuli (10/3/11)
• Pac-Man (walkthrough) (10/25/11)
• HowTo:Milk a Cow (11/6/11)

2012... (Another pretty crappy year.)

• UnBooks:My Tedious Day (1/13/12)
• God's userpage (2/19/12)
• UnReviews:Milk (4/14/12)
• 0.999... (7/4/12)
• Twitter (8/23/12)
• Snips, snails and puppy dog tails (8/28/12)
• Disney (9/4/12)
• Why?:Your cat died (12/13/12)

2013... (The year when Uncyclopedia moved away from Wikia for the 1st time.)

• I want a cookie (1/17/13)
• Get-rich-quick scheme (4/2/13)
• Snakes on a Plane (4/12/13)
• Don't judge a book by its cover (4/29/13)
• 9-11 according to a 5 year old (7/4/13)
• HowTo:Wash the Dishes (7/10/13)
• Katy Perry Hit Generator (7/28/13)
• Constitution of the United States (actual text) (9/4/13)
• Why?:Revert the administrators (9/10/13)
• You don't want to know (9/17/13)
• Cafeteria food (9/20/13)
• Vader v. Vader (9/21/13)
• Twm (10/17/13)
• Why?:My homework was late (11/15/13)
• Page title (11/30/13)
• HowTo:Know if you're right brained or left brained (12/5/13)
• Homework (12/16/13)

2014... (The last best year of Uncyclopedia humor.)

• UnBooks:My school day (1/15/14)
• Content-free (1/19/14)
• The Speck of Dust Next to My Keyboard (2/2/14)
• This is not an article (4/26/14)
• Why?:We Can't Have Nice Things (5/16/14)
• Bread machine (6/13/14)
• F4 (8/19/14)
• UnDebate:What does the fox say? (8/26/14)
• HowTo:Repair a broken smartphone (8/31/14)