User talk:MrN9000

If you are looking for civilised conversation try Max's talk page (MrN however is a right asshole)

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Welcome! This is the talk page of MrN9000. If you'd like to post a message, CLICK HERE to start a new topic. Rules of engagement:
Try to avoid getting engaged, it can be very expensive. Sign and date all your posts by typing four tildes (~~~~). Put new text under old text.	Don't Be A Dick Screw it, I don't really give a monkeys. Be funny, not stupid. Unless you are stupid in which case that's funny. If you post here, I will reply here.

Previous rants: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 7 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19

MrN9000 quit smoking this year and is fucked off that this fucking squirrel still gets to smoke.

Please do not watch this video. Whatever happens also do not watch the full version. Rather than doing that, it's far better to post a message to this user telling him that you know everything contained in this video is wrong, or that this should not be here in the first place.

Note: MrN9000 is the sexy one in this video.

Thanks Dude!

By Jove, fancy meeting you here!? Hey! Is THIS the Moon!? Well, you can take off that bulky space suit, because it's nice and breezy out here! In fact, we're in our global warming (holiday) season, so rejoice, dude!

--Funnybony 21:43, February 22, 2010 (UTC)

MrN on-the-rag

On leaving the front page, MrN, speaking about Funnybony, told UnNews in strange English accent, “I demand justice! This bloody imposter is a thief. He’s been following me around for over a year. I’m sick of it. Every time I fancy a ducky, he fancies her too; and there’s only one dicky! So which one of us will get the pleasure? I work, and HE gets the nut! Always I do all the writing and he gets the credit. Really! There is no justice in this world! I hate Uncyclopedia”, he lamented, ”its SOOO unfair!!!"

Mussss be stepped-on!!!--Funnybony 14:28, February 23, 2010 (UTC)

Well I never! MrN 16:46, Feb 23

And you never will--Funnybony 12:59, February 24, 2010 (UTC)

UnNews:The Kick of Assassination

UnNews:The Kick of Assassination Kinda long, and totally idiotic = GREAT!!?--Funnybony 17:49, February 23, 2010 (UTC)

"We are not writing this as anti-thrillers; we do not believe the killing of enemies is necessarily boring." was my favourite line. During reading it, I thought... Hang on, how is this a parody of news? Then I looked at the link... Looks like you are enjoying UnNews! HeHe. MrN 00:09, Feb 24

Dude, my dear unGuru, I think the best line is:

The mission could only be successfully carried out if the assassin gets his/her Nut; otherwise the mission is just no damn fun. Like a junkie overdosing just to obtain a small kick, the Israelis focused their thrills in targeting just one man, just for fun, not to take the piss out of other thrill seekers or fellow terrorists.

and also, "Long Live Grant's Tomb!"

UnNews is more fun and feels more rewarding than Articles, but articles are way more important. I'm really proud (humbled) by being the author of such a big subject as Mike Tyson, which Max liked enough to lock it, without my request. Because that's a BIG subject. Plus our joint-venture 2012, which is really read a lot (I bet). And it's damn funny!

BTW: Some stranger nom to VFH my NATO news. In case you want to vote. So far, everyone is voting against. Humm? I think it is strange when people let political bias get in the way of absurd humor. To kill 200 Taliban you also must kill 190,000 people, now THAT is bloody absurd!!!--Funnybony 13:11, February 24, 2010 (UTC)

My sig

I've put a little more support under it so it's not spilling out everywhere now. Nominally Humane! some time 01:31, 24/02/2010

It don't look anything like as cool as it did though... :-( (Thanks for that) MrN 01:40, Feb 24

BJAODN

Yes, I know what BJAODN was. I still don't get what makes BJAODN funny. It plays it way too straight. Wild at Heart 02:57, February 24, 2010 (UTC)

It's a parody of Wikipedia. If you don't think it's funny then that's why we have a vote I guess... IMO it's not total carp, and we should have an article about this subject and this article is as good a start as any. Not having this would be worse than having it IMO. That's usually the reason I vote keep to most things... MrN 07:39, Feb 24

Deleting article

Please could you delete the Hereford Cathedral School article, as the school has found out about it and would like it to be taken off? I'm the creator of the original article, Omnissiuntone, and I give my consent for it to be removed.

MrN, due to creative blanking attempts I've protected the article for now. Your call since you were involved in this whole story. ~ 17:29, February 24, 2010 (UTC)

Thanks Mordillo... Cool. I deleted it. Shame, it looked like a good article to me, but as you created it, I'm happy to remove it. You guys obviously have some writing talent, I hope you decide to stick around and write something else for us. Maybe something which will not get you in trouble with your teachers next time! :P Have fun... MrN 17:38, Feb 24

Yardbirds reborn

Dude! Bro! You saved and hugely improved the article. My hero! I admit, I was pretty wasted at 4 am when I posted that. I should have sent it to you. So my next UnNews will be sent to you before ever posting. And I hope its no bother for you. More soon. Cheers!!!--Funnybony 10:28, February 25, 2010 (UTC)

If you want to check with me, that's cool. I think you do know what you are doing, maybe you just need to lay off the soma when adding stuff to the UnNews template. ;) MrN 19:01, Feb 25

Sigh

Thanks for calling me Nigga. Sigh. As for the photo, I really like it, she just seems so happy and carefree and just happens to have no clothes on, so I thought it was a candidate for pron which isn't pron. Matfen and I had discussed this, in his pee review and talk page. Now to find a new photo, maybe a very discrete one, go the opposite of what's expected. Any photo candidates come to mind, Mad Max may know. Thanks again. Al 13:36 26 2 2MX

It's a sad day when a Uncyclopedia user needs help finding their own pron... MrN 13:56, Feb 26

I have a can of worms to discuss

Following that whole issue with the NSFW pic you deleted. What are we doing about all of the "super secret girl pages" which are all around the site? That has been irking me for a long time now, as we're essentially operating as a pron hosting site. Before I open a serious discussion about that, what do you think? ~ 14:37, February 26, 2010 (UTC)

>:( -OptyC Sucks! CUN16:04, 26 Feb

Sorry Opty, I promise to find you an alternative source for boobies. ~ 16:24, February 26, 2010 (UTC)

Not to get too deep into this now, but I looked at Opty's site and found no por|v at all, except for maybe the last two pics (a woman has some kind of shadow at the top of her legs, I don't know what that could be, and the last pic should be up for "Porn VFD". Breasts are not considered por in any civilized country now, and in many areas of the world woman don't have to cover them. Maybe pron a long time ago. And girls touching each other can only mean one thing--they are nicely grooming each other to remove mites. Anyway, bottom line, no pron on Opty's page at all, and now that the smiling girl just standing there has bit her dust, maybe none left on the site anymore. ~   16:32 26 2 2MX

Here's the thing, since it's pretty obvious which page we're talking about. If there are specific pictures you think are too racy for Uncyc, then delete them. It's happened on several occasions already and you haven't heard a peep out of me. But why do you gotta mess with my page as a whole? That won't sit right with me at all. -OptyC Sucks! CUN16:59, 26 Feb

I guess the line is "are breasts obscene?" and in what context. I argue no, in any context, and social norms have evolved to this pov it seems. Maybe tv networks still adhere in the states to "breasts are pron" but that hasn't been really tested in the courts as far as I know because all the networks are fine with the arrangement. Maybe a forum topic, this page can get filled up before Mr.N comes back from his sojurns. Al in Chains, few minutes later

Well, here in the UK the top selling newspaper is called "The Sun". It's been a while since I last checked, but it always used to have a topless girl on page 3. "The Page 3 Girls" and all that... *happy memories of Sam Fox in my younger years...* The Sun is not considered pron, it's not a top self mag, it's sold along with all the other newspapers. The Sunday Sport here also claims to be a "newspaper" *cough* and that has even more pictures of topless girls. It's actually got a "nipple count" in it I think whereby the reader can be sure that they did not miss any of them. The Sport is also sold on the bottom shelf of the newspaper stand along with the Times, The Telegraph, The Guardian and all the rest. Also in the UK if you are 15 you can rent a film, or go to the pictures to see a film (on your own) which has topless girls in it. *MrN wanders off into happy memories of being 15 and legally going to rent a copy of The Delinquents because you actually got to see Kylie Minogue's norks...* (yes norks are tits for those not from the UK). I figure that a 15 year old is still a child, legally they are for sure, (the age of consent here is 16, though it's 15 in France) and I'm sure it's not a good idea to sell "pron" to kids. I figure that by this thinking it's generally accepted here (in the UK) that pictures of topless girls are not pron. As for the "lower area" I tend to think on a case by case basis. Basically I think it's kinda OK if there is some kinda attempt at making it tasteful, but if you can actually tell what she had for breakfast then that's probably not right. I would say that something like this is right on the edge of what we should allow, but it's OK. The one I deleted today after Aleister agreed to remove it was probably too far over the line in that it was not really trying to be anything other than obvious wank material... As for if we should allow people to host these images in their userspace... I think we should allow users to do whatever they want to with their userspace, but I do think that the same rules about images should apply to user space that do to the mainspace. If we would not allow an image in a mainspace article, we should not allow it in userspace. Anyone browsing Category:Pictures of naked girls or any of the others linked from that template could reasonable expect that they were allowed to use anything they find there in a mainspace article. I don't think an image needs to actually be being used in the mainspace to justify someone having it in userspace, but it should be possible for a person to use one of those images in an article if they want to.

As for if it's wrong for a user to create a page specifically just to "host pron" then I don't think we should do anything to stop that so long as the images fit with the "No blatant pictures of girls Fannies" rule... For those not from the UK a Fanny is another name for her muffin. Obviously. ;) We already have various image galleries anyway really with Category:Pictures of naked girls and the many other similar categories which are linked from that template. That is in mainspace also which probably is more of an issue than stuff which is more 'hidden' in userspace... I'm very cautious about imposing rules on what people can do with their userspace. Agreed we are not here to host peoples blogs or provide personal free webspace to anyone who wants it, but I do feel that if a user chooses to have a collection of images which we would permit in the mainspace hidden away somewhere in their userspace then there is not much wrong with that. How many images would constitute an "image gallery" which would make it not acceptable? Yep, it's a can of worms we can't open unless we remove all the pictures of tits from Uncyc (that's just not going to happen IMO). If hosting those images was all a user was using Uncyc for then I might consider that they were taking the piss a bit, but I don't think that's the case with the few examples of this which I know about. Orian has a page for gays full of boys ya know! I recommend you don't investigate that... ;)

Looking around a bit, I do think we have a few images which we probably should not. I will have a bit more of a hunt about, and huff the ones which don't fit with what I said above. From what OptyC says above he probably acknowledges that maybe some of the images he's got there are over the line, and I will remove the ones which are.

Man. It's a dirty job, but someones got to do it. Browsing through pron *cough* artistic images for the betterment of Uncyclopedia is just something I'm willing to do. Just all part of the service... In addition, if anyone has any new images which they would like me to pass judgement on feel free to ask for judgement. Now, all I need to do is get paid for this and I truly will have reached nirvana. :) MrN 18:45, Feb 26

To be honest, I didn't have Opty's boob page in mind when I started the subject, there are way too many of them all around the place. Also, it's not the boobage by itself. You know? I don't mind boobs on the site at all. What I do mind is people building whole pages that don't include anything but nude or semi nude pictures - for no reason at all. We keep forgetting that this is not a social networking website. OK, there's a lot of socializing going around, but if the primary objective of uploading nude and semi nude pictures isn't, by the end of the day, to contribute to some articles, then you have no business of uploading them or holding them in a "super secret page". I think we might have also exaggerated with the userspace amnesty. Am I making sense or do I sound like comrade Jo? ~ 20:55, February 26, 2010 (UTC)

Hi. I've actually used Opty's page to seek out photos for pages, both my own and just random site articles, quite a few times. It's a very good depository, imnho. So, at least for me, it has been quite useful, and there is at least one photo on it I have in mind for an UnNews page. ~   22:11 26 2 2MX

You are making sense. I think it's a tricky one though... I agree that people should not be uploading lots of pron pictures if they have no intention of using them in an article. I just took another look at OptyC's page... (dam this is a hard job, but alas I must) I picked 10 at random, and 8 of them were currently being used in the mainsapce. I think what I have tended to see is that people see an image being used in an article, and grab a copy of the link and put it on their page. As Aleister suggests there is actually an advantage to such a page as OptyC's as it provides users with a list of "approved" images, so they don't need to risk uploading something which might be across the line. I agree with, if I may quote you... "if primary objective of uploading nude and semi nude pictures isn't, by the end of the day, to contribute to some articles, then you have no business of uploading them or holding them in a "super secret page"." That sounds fair enough to me. I don't know of any cases of that happening to a great extent mind, maybe you do... I don't think OptyC's page would come under that category.

I do think there should be a fair amount of scope for allowing people (within reason) to do what they wish with their user pages though. For example, if a user wanted to maintain his own personal shopping list in a sub page of his user page I would not object so long as they were regularly contributing to the site in other useful ways. For me I see Uncyc as kinda "my home" on the internet. It's where I hang out and where most of what I care about on the net is. I think that's the same for a lot of our regular users. Sometimes I might want to store something on here which I never intend to put into the mainspace. I don't see the harm in that, so long as me doing so does not significantly interfere with others. OK someone has to see the entry on recent changes when I add it, but I don't really see the harm in that. I figure that I have done enough for Uncyc that if I (from time to time) wanted to use my userspace for something other than producing mainspace articles then... Well, I figure I have earned the right. I think it's the same for any of our regular contributors. I'm not really talking about pron with that, but generally speaking in terms of intention of use.

If it's pron pictures we are talking about then there is more of an issue of significant interference with the wiki. User pages are still publicly visible, and if people are uploading pictures just for their user space then... Yea, that's probably not the image we want to be presenting to the outside world. If most of those images are being used in articles, and especially if they were uploaded by a different user then it's different I would suggest. MrN 23:08, Feb 26

Can you do me a solid?

Can you fix it so that my UotM award goes to Guildy instead of me? TKF has confirmed that I only won because of asshattery and I certainly don't want that on my shoulders. Thanks. -OptyC Sucks! CUN18:49, 26 Feb

I just read that shit. No. You won the award fair and square. People sometimes don't vote anyway if they can see that others have and as such even if TKF's vote was stricken then you may very well have won. It's far too late to strike votes now anyway. The award history stays as it is. The pair of you need to stop being dicks. MrN 18:57, Feb 26

Maybe I would have won, and maybe I wouldn't have. We'll never know for sure now. And having an award that I didn't earn fairly is offensive to me. Might as well slap me in the face. I've removed my name from the list of winners. If you won't give it to Guildy that's fine, but know that I won't claim it either. -OptyC Sucks! CUN20:33, 26 Feb

You did win if fairly. I'm telling you that. Who do you trust more? Me or him? Don't be an ass. TKF is just trying to make you feel bad because you had a row with him, and it worked. Don't fall for such an obvious troll and stop being so silly. You can remove the award from your userpage if you are daft enough to believe TKF, but I'm going to stop you from removing yourself from the UotM history page. Dude.... Just, Dude. He's a kid half your age. Chill. MrN 20:40, Feb 26

You actually reverted before I had the chance. There's no discussion and your name isn't going to be stricken from the record. You can't be a drama queen, Opty, you're too hairy for that. ~ 20:46, February 26, 2010 (UTC)

Hairy and sexy. But in a strictly heterosexual kinda way, obviously. MrN 20:47, Feb 26

Obviously. ~ 20:50, February 26, 2010 (UTC)

No. I'm not trying to be a drama queen. TKF is telling the truth, he told me as much at the time but back then I thought he was joking. I seriously don't want an award I didn't earn fairly. I feel strongly about this. -OptyC Sucks! CUN20:56, 26 Feb

Bollocks to that. Seriously, there is no way this awarded is being removed and there is no way I'm going to change the voting records because of something TKF said or didn't. There is a voting record, you earned it fair and square for stuff you're doing around and that's it. ~ 20:59, February 26, 2010 (UTC)

Probably the thing I respect the most about you Chris is that most of the time you are very cool, calm, level headed and a very good judge of what is right and what is wrong. For some reason this one got to you that's all... MrN 21:03, Feb 26

Because this is wrong. Guildy deserves the award, I don't. Simple as. -OptyC Sucks! CUN21:05, 26 Feb

I just went and looked at the vote... Um you won by +15. Guildensternenstein and Zana Dark both tied for second with 9. So TKF drummed up 6 votes from people in IRC who were easy to trick into voting did he... Um... Let's look at the last few people who voted for you... Um... Out of the last few votes Socky, UU, TLB, Boomer, Ape, Sycamore, Sonje ZB ... Yea, all those people are easy to persuade by some bullshit in IRC from TKF. ... I think not. He might have got you 1 or 2 extra votes, but you would still have won regardless. It's VERY rare for any kinda gerrymandering to actually change the result of such things dude. You know that yourself. If there was a cabal you would not be able to fix it. Course there is not one, but I'm talking hypothetically, obviously. MrN 21:18, Feb 26

I voted out of love. Deep, meaningful love. Don't try to deny that love, Opty. --UU - natter 21:43, Feb 26

Hea! Who let you back in! Aren't you meant to be up to you neck in baby vomit or something? :D MrN 22:04, Feb 26

Look, this is how I feel about this

I appreciate that not everyone voted because of TKF's spiteful prodding. I'm not even saying that anybody besides TKF was being spiteful. And in truth, I don't really care about the award. The thing is, if there's even the possibility that it was a tainted nom, then that makes me feel like utter shit. I'd have rather lost than win unfairly. You can tell me that I won fair and square, but the truth is you don't know that any better than I do. I don't want to be the UotM with an asterisk, and I certainly don't want an award that somebody else should have won. If we can't change it now, then I'm not sure what to do. But I am not happy right now. And yes, I still love you UU. How are the baby User and mama doing? -OptyC Sucks! CUN22:23, 26 Feb

Actually I know that the majority of the people who voted for you are totally impervious to any kind of "spiteful prodding". Having been around this place for 2 and a half years, and knowing some of those dudes rather well... Yes. I do know that. MrN 22:33, Feb 26

Okay - break it down. Does Guildy deserve an award for UotM? Probably, so nominate him next month. Does Opty deserve an award for UotM? Definitely, because he was voted in by the community. Does this bitching about it serve any positive purpose? No, because there's no harm done. Does this possibly have a negative effect? Yes, because it cheapens the value of UotM. Long story short, if Opty got his way, then given the fact that so far the only two people who have said he may not deserve it are Opty and TFK, the bulk of Uncyclopedians would probably vote Opty in next month to clean this up. If not, then I can assure you the fact that Guildy is not UotM is an oversight that I intend to try and remedy by nomming him and voting for him in about an hours time, and I'm sure that I wouldn't be alone in that support. So get over it - you deserve this, Guildy deserves this, the whole conversation is a just a piss in the ocean - so let's get Guildy his UotM and all will be good with the world. Nominally Humane! some time 23:11, 26/02/2010

Wait! Your latest signature is not actually contriving the size regulations! What the hell are you playing at man! MrN 23:20, Feb 26

Ummm... I think you meant the one before latest. Actually, it's about 1px too tall, but because it's partially an abs positioning it won't effect any other formatting around it, I assume we're happy to let 1px slide - besides which, you know I'll change it again in about 5 minutes. Nominally Humane! some time 23:39, 26/02/2010

Generally speaking you can get away with anything around here so long as the admins don't find out. Just don't tell em. Um. ;) MrN 23:42, Feb 26

Obvious troll is obvious

Penis. • FreddThe Redd • • • 20:41 • Friday, 26-02-2010

Late apology

Originally I thought I might try and wait til things simply blow over (that time I accidentally stabbed my cousin? I blanked/avoided him until he forgot about it, true story) but I feel like approaching it instead, since we can only ever go forward in whatever circumstances. I'm sorry I was being a bitchy bitch on this talk page about what people want to do with their private space and you're right in that there shouldn't be a limit (anywhere) on where politics can invite itself. I believe it's admirable when someone isn't afraid or quiet about their own views. Also you were right anyway that I don't even know much about Monkfish or whoever it was again, because I can't hear speech on videos very well anyway so I was reluctant to do any research further than the Observer. Again, I apologise for flinging faeces at the fan. --nldr 23:04, February 26, 2010 (UTC)

You probably noticed that I removed the flashing blinking bold IN YOUR BASTARD FACE type text cos... Well... As you pointed out, that probably was kinda a bit over the top... :) Don't worry, I will not say anything more to you about old 'Monkfish' Lol. Thank you for coming here and saying this. You have now won my complete and total respect again. MrN 23:17, Feb 26

Same here, thanks sir. :) --nldr 23:23, February 26, 2010 (UTC)

And for the encore - you can apologize for your other sig that calls moi a facist. Stgdish! ~ 18:20, February 27, 2010 (UTC)

What? I assumed that was a compliment? MrN 20:29, Feb 27

Various from Spike

Sorry I didn't take our recent sockpuppet straight to UN:BP as you suggested. I wasn't sure, just a nagging "Spidey sense" because the VFD nominations related to Don Bluth movies. And--lame excuse coming--I figured there were enough admins on VFD, presumably with tools to do a positive ID on him via IP address--that Someone Else would do it.

Separately, Anon from various IP addresses has repeatedly hit Pie to add a quote referencing "TIMMMMAY!" and, lately, removing the cryptic one from Sursum Corda. Would you mind protecting Pie against Anons for a while?

Am in an abbreviated Internet session parked in front of a public library. My house is without power for a second day due to winter storm; best guess is I will be out for two more. Coverage on VFD and UnNews will suffer. Spıke ¬  13:18 27-Feb-10

I protected Pie... What? You are not allowed time off! Maybe you should move into the library until your internet is restored? Just push some of the bookshelves together and make some kinda a teepee type arrangement or something? MrN 13:23, Feb 27

Raptors with Chainsaws

Image done and added - how's it look? Rabbi Techno kvetch Contribs FOXES 13:34, February 27, 2010 (UTC)

Rather dame awesome actually.  :) I fancy that the guy who wrote that article has some real talent, and I'm sure when he/she sees how much effort you went to on this it might just give them the encouragement they need to go on and write some more for us... Thanks a lot man. Great job. MrN 13:40, Feb 27

Thankyou, thankyou. I was a bit worried about the caveman - he's not quite what I had in mind but he'll suffice. I saw the article when it appeared on New Pages back in January and also thought it showed promise, so let's hope the author will develop it further. After all, Uncyclopedia and the Internet will always have room for more velociraptors and/or chainsaws. :-) Rabbi Techno kvetch Contribs FOXES 13:45, February 27, 2010 (UTC)

Why don't you face me like a man, rather than a crypto-fascist?

Don't be an arse.

Thats right, I'm talking to you. You deleted my little recipe without discussing any of the salient points that I raised. There was ample time for you to meet these points before the deletion date but you didn't. My guess is that you were irritated that I made a witty remark about your decision to mark the page. Why would you not discuss it like a reasonable human being? And typing the words 'UN:Pee' does not cut it. I'm sure you get a lot of enjoyment out of the petty power that you wield, but you'd appear more powerful if you had a couple of balls and half a brain to discuss the points that people raise rather than shitting all over their work after nothing more than a cursory glance because you don't get it.

So why don't you at least re-instate my discussion of the topic and join in the debate rather than acting like a coward? --Archie Wah Wah 15:10, February 27, 2010 (UTC)

I don't have to do anything for you. I'm a volunteer here. Tell you what... If you say "Please" I will bother to explain why. Other than that go back to watching Red Dwarf episodes. MrN 15:04, Feb 27

Pleeease will you talk to me like a human being? P.S. not sure about the Red Dwarf reference - haven't watched that for about 10 years... --Archie Wah Wah 15:10, February 27, 2010 (UTC)

Well... Red Dwarf is (I'm guessing) where you got the term "crypto-fascist" from. You know the episode where they go back in-time to try to give the Tension Sheet to Rimmer? That was the episode where the young Lister was acting like an ass, thinking that all authority figures were sooooo "crypto-fascist", and that everyone was against him. Truth was that his drummer "Dobin" grew up to eventually join a large insurance company and got his own parking space. Maybe you are acting a bit like young Lister. Why don't ya try acting a bit like grown up Lister. You, know the cool one? Who everyone liked and actually had things figured out.

I'm not your enemy ya plonker. I'm a sysop on Uncyclopedia. A comedy website which I do for fun. We do however have ways of doing things here. If we did not the site would turn to shit. OK, to answer your questions...

"My guess is that you were irritated that I made a witty remark about your decision to mark the page" -- Um no. You made a witty remark about me? Sorry I must have missed that. I deal with thousands of articles and delete thousands of others. If you were poking fun at me and I had noticed I would have invited it and welcomed the challenge of replying... Um, it was Under user who put an ICU on the page, not me anyway. Odd that you thought we were the same person.

"if you had a couple of balls" You are in the UK right? Tell you what... How about you come to my home town (Bristol) and we could meet up in person. I would be happy to do so. Tell me when you are coming to Bristol and we can arrange to met somewhere. Perhaps then we could establish if I had any balls or not.

"So why don't you at least re-instate my discussion of the topic and join in the debate rather than acting like a coward?" You mean this? It's still there. How can I re-instate something which is still there?

The point that you are missing is that what you should have done was get a Pee Review. That's why I told you to go to UN:PEE.

You said... "It doesn't need peeing for I do not wish to change it...thanks! What I would like is for some moderator or authority of some kind around here to answer the charge, address the issue, show me the whites of their eyes. Please. Thankyou. Bye."

Had you taken my advice then the person who reviewed your article would have given you the advice which you require. Your mistake was by starting a forum topic and saying Look I has written an article!!!! EVERY ONE MUST READ IT!!!. Dude, we get hundreds of articles created every week here. If we allowed a person to start a forum in the Village Dump for each of their articles then we could not use the Village Dump for what it is intended to be used for. That's general discussion about site wide issues. The reason no one bothered to talk to you in your forum about it was because you somehow think that your article is particularly special and deserves special attention above the articles written by everyone else. We have a place where people can post articles to be reviewed... It's called UN:PEE. You said that you have no intention of changing so I deleted it because as it was it was not suitable as a Uncyclopedia article. You had 7 days to improve it, and you did not. It still needed lots of work. It's not that you have come up with some totally new form of humour which is totally wonderful and people are too scared to discuss it with you. We have had many similar style articles to the one you were trying to write before, yours was just not up to scratch enough to be kept as it was without further work. It was too short, had no links to other articles at all, and whatever humour it contained was probably only funny to fans of Delia Smith. The humour needs to appeal to a wider audience than that, even if it is intended for a narrow audience it still needs to have some humour which will appeal to the masses. Those are just some of the problems it had. I'm not going to go into more detail about it now as this is not a Pee Review. What I can do now is restore the article for you, and you can now take my advice and post a request on Pee Review. If however you don't intend to change the article further than what it was there really is little point in me doing so as it would be deleted again.

Do you want me to restore it for you so that you can request a Pee Review and get some advice and then improve it? MrN 16:00, Feb 27

Is it actually possible to have a wider audience than the fans of Delia Smith? The entire population of the world (including and especially Delia Smith) are fans of Delia Smith, surely...? Rabbi Techno kvetch Contribs FOXES 16:09, February 27, 2010 (UTC)

The worrying thing is that Delia Smith has the most fans in the part of the world which UU comes from, and it was him who put the ICU on... Oh Archie Wah Wah... I suggest you read through BGBU and then HTBFANJS if you intend to stick around. MrN 16:16, Feb 27

She's popular here too, and throughout the rest of East Anglia. But then, the only famous people from here are Lord Nelson, Oliver Cromwell, Stephen Fry and Delia - when your locals heroes number just four, two of whom are dead, you have little choice in the matter. Rabbi Techno kvetch Contribs FOXES 16:28, February 27, 2010 (UTC)

Don't give us this nonsense pretending to be from East Anglia! We all know you are Welsh. There is no denying it! MrN 16:45, Feb 27

Been living her for almost 30 years though, hence no trace of a Welsh accent. I've still got a tail and webbed feet however. Rabbi Techno kvetch Contribs FOXES 17:12, February 27, 2010 (UTC)

Back to the topic at hand though. I'm more than happy to do a PEE review of the article. I will point out that I thought it was cruft and had little redeeming value, except I will make the one point - the concept of doing a parody of a recipe is a good one, but that is only half a concept. What you need to do is find the comedy inherent in the concept and bring it to life. I have no suggestions how to do this except to give you the concept that I had in mind, which means odds are somebody will steal it, but it wasn't extremely original anyway. I was going to do a number of recipes for different cocktails, using the format of Wikipedia:Old Fashioned as a basis for it. As the list of cocktails went on it would become obvious that the writer was getting steadily drunker. This would start with a straight voice with a few jokes thrown in, and then get into One shot goes into the glass, and then one goes straight into your mouth and progress to I love you man. Not in a gay way, but I f--king love you.

Alternatively if you were wanting to make fun of the Delia smith type, make it a parody of a cooking show, where you have the straight laced conservative show presenter, along with all the Here's one I prepared earlier cliches, but underlie it with some other personality aspect, like an embittered ex-wife, and the recipes she's preparing are A fantastic leg of lamb, baked to perfection. This shows that you are a wonderful wife as you can cook, and not some giraffe with breasts secretary who should be shot or And the first thing to give your delightful husband in the morning is this delightful breakfast smoothie, complete with shards of broken glass. It's just like a chocolate milkshake, only crunchy.

Humour-wise, random humour rarely - if never - works. The trick to random humour working at least effectively if not brilliantly is to have sense behind the insensible. Read HTBFANJS for more on this.

Beyond that I didn't proof-read the article, but I recall the format was fairly standard. It doesn't need to be any better, but a more professional format drags the reader into the parody that much more effectively. A good example of this is Older version of Stereotype vs Newer version of stereotype. The change in formatting toward the end added an extra element to this article that made it so much better, and the inclusion of just a few dotted lines - while not changing the content - just made this feel so much more like a Hi-fi store catalogue, and as such more easily recognisable, which makes it funnier. You might also benefit from reading User_talk:PuppyOnTheRadio/Pox#Truth as it goes into this in more detail.

Don't really remember images, so they can't have been too exciting.

And that is a nutshell PEE review based on a reading of the article a few days ago. Hope it helps you understand how it needed to be changed in order to make it worth keeping. Nominally Humane! some time 20:49, 27/02/2010

Oh, and one last point. UN:JOB. Won't help with your article, but may help you learn how to treat people a little more politely. Nominally Humane! some time 20:52, 27/02/2010

Puppy can go suck a bag of dicks. --Pleb SYNDROME _{CUN medicate (butt poop!!!!)} 20:55, February 27, 2010 (UTC)

Do they have to be bagged? Nominally Humane! some time 21:03, 27/02/2010

Don't give me all that. You only came here cos someone told you there was a picture of an arse on my talkpage. MrN 21:05, Feb 27

True, but when I saw it I thought bummer. Nominally Humane! some time 03:03, 28/02/2010

UnNews:Massive Earthquake, Giant Sink Hole Swallows Chile

Dude! I just put this up. I didn't want to put on your talk page. If you think it's funny enough please empower it with "the farce". May the farce be with you! Thanks--Funnybony 15:40, February 27, 2010 (UTC)

Nice. That one looks ready to add to the UnNews template to me. Oh you know that they deleted the records from Haarp just before the Haiti Earthquake and that you have googled this. Right. Obviously you have... ;-) You are one of those communists. I can tell.  ;) MrN 16:06, Feb 27

Here's one that's just totally true

Dude! You might like this and help it. Written by a former Local. Hope you like it, it's just a starter. Bro!--Funnybony 22:50, February 27, 2010 (UTC)

Will look at some point later... Did you ever look at The Bro Code? MrN 23:49, Feb 27

Didn't I mention? I loved the Bro Code! That's amazingly original. I didn't really pay attention to grammar, etc., but it looked like FA material to me, loads of work, and a lot of laughs out loud. I reread Monckton Denial, and just couldn't think of a single thing to improve, so that is also close to FA once you're satisfied - in my opinion. I'll be glad to Nom it. But the Lord Monckton article is not good for FA vote, because too many people will complain it's like a script (probably, anyway). I did more work on Local, and, having been on both ends of the stick, I know about this subject. Hehe!!--Funnybony 09:45, February 28, 2010 (UTC)

I don't think Lord Christopher Monckton denial would stand a hope in hell of being featured. Na, they are not ready for that one yet... I'm happy with it just being there right now ;) There is nothing wrong with an article being like a script. We have featured scripts before... Lord Monckton is not up to scratch for VFH yet though... MrN 09:54, Feb 28

Dude! Why do you think Denial has no chance? Because of the article or the subject-subject? What needs to be done to make it ready? Same with the LORD article..if not worthy, then what is missing/wrong? A Ree Review is just going to give another point of view besides yours. Cheers--Funnybony 10:36, February 28, 2010 (UTC)

Probably just not enough funny in both of them I figure. Both are kinda just trying to push our POV about global warming (which will give us big time negative points from the voters) and don't have enough lolz to compensate for that. The trick would be to make them funny so that people who come from both sides of the debate would find them amusing if you wanted VFH. As it is, Denier especially is dam right insulting to people who believe in global warming. This is how I want it. ;) I don't care about FAs man. ;) I did tell you about{{Recent}} right? That's how you get a link to your new (close to completion) articles on the front page... A lot of people appear to forget about {{Recent}} for some reason. So, your challange with Lord Monckton would be to make it so that Lord Monckton himself, and Al Gore would both find it funny. If you can do that and still push your POV... Then you will have mastered Uncyc IMO. ;) I don't know how to do that btw, I still have much to learn myself... MrN 10:55, Feb 28

Dude, this {{Recent}} - we can just put an article there without any vote? By ourselves? And who decides what stays? BTW: I understand you about wanting to keep denier as YOU like, rather than having it changed. I feel like that about some articles we have, like Soma is great (in my 1/6.2 billionth of opinion). But, personally, I think new Local is pretty damn silly AND very true. Can I just put it here {{Recent}}? If so, would you please have a look first. I know you have lots to do, but I think it's a good one that came out of nowhere. Cheers!--Funnybony 14:15, February 28, 2010 (UTC)

{{Recent}} works just like {{RecentUnNews}} does. If you know enough to know how you probably know enough to not put something there which is pants. Yes, you can put Local there right now. Just make sure you follow the guidelines on the page. :) There is no vote. I will take a look at it, but you can go ahead and put it there now anyway. I'm sure you know what you are doing enough now to be able to judge if it's OK or not. The person who decides if it stays is anyone who decides to remove something. Generally people don't remove stuff which others have put up there, unless it's REALLY bad. Actually that hardly ever happens. To be honest we probably need to advertise both these templates more than we do. Enjoy. MrN 20:44, Feb 28

Note

I think you were going for iCarly, not lcarly. As for the change, yayyyy!. On the Nicholson thing, I just wanted other people's opinions, it's a very interesting random filled but segments like UnBook page and I wanted to see what other people thought about keeping it, huffing it, or locking it in a cage and look at it from time to time. iJack. ~   23:41 27 2 2MX

Dude. I'm now so confused I don't know which end is up. How about you fix it like it should be? As for VFD If you are not going to even make a delete vote yourself you are wasting our time. "Shit or get off the pot" as my grandmother used to say... VFD is for deleting articles. Not chatting about them. MrN 23:45, Feb 27

Yea, Um. iCarly, not lcarly? Yea, you totally lost me. Tell me what is wrong please? lcarly? MrN 23:59, Feb 27

I just tried to move it to iCarly, small i, but the innernest machine that controls moves won't accept that, keeps saying that it's already named ICarly. That's it in a nutshell, the show's name was with a small i. -- On Nicholson, does Uncy have anyplace just to discuss a particular article other than creating a forum topic? That's all I wanted to do, discuss the Nicholson page, and when I log on again I guess I can create a talk page for the article and see if anyone else has thoughts about it. But if there was a meeting place where people could toss out names of articles and discuss them all, or some of them, on the same page, that may or may not end up to be a populated site. Done for today, enjoy. ~   1:10 28 Feb. MMX

Well the page I origionally huffed was :

23:15, 27 February 2010 MrN9000 (Talk | contribs | block) huffed "ICarly" ‎ 

With a Capital "I". To be honest I'm not sure you can have a page starting with a lower case letter. Maybe you are confused? You certainly confused me b4 by talking about "lcarly" With a lowercase "L".

I suspect that what confused you was the {{title-left|iCarly}} which was on the old page. That changes the title which appears at the top of the page, but not the actual page name.

As for talking about a page, you should use the talk page of the article, or if you want to improve the article UN:PEE. If we had a single page for people to discuss each page on here then it would be rather full don't you think? Would we call it the everything page? :P That's what talk pages are for dude. If you think it's pants, nom it for VFD and give a delete vote. As I said... If you are willing to work on improving it, use UN:PEE, if ya just want to chat about it, that's the talk page. Sometimes people create forums about a particular article, but that's generally not recommended unless it's some kinda special case or something. MrN 01:27, Feb 28

Quick and seriously out of here this time. The tv program's name was "iCarly", with the lower case i. That's all I was saying, but maybe you are right and the code won't let a page start with a small letter. -- I don't want to work on Jack Nicholson, in fact, like I said, it may be a masterpiece of random. To try to clean up the random might ruin the page, and to add random on purpose would seem contrived if not done very well. That's why I wanted to discuss it, to see if others like it, hate it, or have never seen it. It's an unusual page, for the reasons I've mentioned. Over and out, iAleister later that hour

Use the talk page. ;) MrN 02:00, Feb 28

BTW, it is impossible to start a page with a lower case letter. Or in other words, the first letter is caps insensitive. The rest of the title is caps-sensitive, however. I believe it so cat and Cat link to the same page. --Mn-z 05:10, February 28, 2010 (UTC)

Nein! The whole thing is caps sensitive, however when doing a search wiki will look for it as it is, and then look for it capitalising just the first letter, and then search capitalising the first letter of every word. Which is why you can find User talk:PuppyOnTheRadio with user talk:puppyOnTheRadio or user talk:PuppyOnTheRadio, but not with User talk:Puppyontheradio or USER TALK:PUPPYONTHERADIO or uSER TALK:pUPPYoNtHErADIO. That's why when choosing a user name for yourself it is advisable to not have caps in the middle of a word. Damn damn damn! Nominally Humane! some time 05:56, 28/02/2010

Ya are missing the point young puppy! Try creating a page which starts with a lowercase letter. Go on. :P MrN 09:48, Feb 28

You sir! With the fake boobs!

I believe the Unsignpost is ready to be delivered. Can you unleash hell? (and maybe do a quick proofreading before you do?) ~ 13:48, February 28, 2010 (UTC)

I let him loose! MrN 20:36, Feb 28

Joe Pesci

Dude! Thanks for reverting from that vandalism on Joe Pesci. On the ball, bro!--Funnybony 15:55, February 28, 2010 (UTC)

I'm actually trying to do a quick trawl though every new contribution to the mainspace on the wiki at the moment (which has not already been checked) and that one just came up with the rest that I fixed... NP man. MrN 20:38, Feb 28

Why

Why did you delete the vast majority of my work on England? you could of at least reworked it... Dienkonig 22:59, February 28, 2010 (UTC)

I'm an admin. I'm not a regular editor of that page. I just saw some edits which appeared to be out of character with the tone and style of the rest of the article (as I said in my edit summary). Looking back, maybe I was a little too hasty with you on that one and my judgement may have been a little off. Your style was rather different, but still you did make it better so I will put it back, and will not revert you again. Sorry, my bad. Enjoy. MrN 23:09, Feb 28

UnSignpost 25th February 2010 (It's not late your mum is)

The Uncyclopedia UnSignpost

Proudly supporting editorial independence whenever the board say it's okay

Feb 25th, 2010 • Issue 77 • Slurping the froth of Truth off the cappuccino of News

Games, games and more games! We have more games then you can poke a stick at! By POTR Is the games namespace 99.9% shit was the question elegantly asked by OptyC recently. A simple question that has sparked a storm in a teacup. While Uncyclopedia is, undoubtably, the pinnacle of fine parody, it has been suggested the this particular poor cousin of the Main space has been allowed to fall into disrepair and disrepute due to the influx of poorly crafted content. In the words of one editor Delete it. It's cruft and I'm not even sure if it qualifies as a parody namespace of anything on Wikipedia. However, despite the lack of quality content, a significant portion of users have requested that it remain in play, however it be improved by having a little tender loving care given to it, along with a more rigid amount of cruft huffing. As such, it is with open arms we welcome the inclusion into this realm of the new moderator of the Games namespace OptyC, who will be referred to going forward as the Game Master. Upon the announcement of this singularly spectacular accolade, Optyc's first words were Maybe I shoulda just kept my mouth shut, eh? Although much respect must be levelled his way at the way he has taken to his new role with much gusto, winnowing through the chaff to find the kernels of wheat available in there. For more information on these developments, visit Forum:The Games namespace. It's Alive! By Mordillo A new blow to the "democrats"/"liberals"/"whiny bitches" of Uncyclopedia, opposing the disputed hereditary law. Senior member of the non existent Cabal and editor-in-chief-in-absentia of this newspaper, UU has announced the birth of heiress to the throne, also known as UUette. UUette was reportedly born holding a scepter and a miniature ban hammer, wearing a crown and QVFD grade galoshes and waving frantically at the hysterical cheering masses. The non existent cabal promptly announced a reserved seat for UUette in the VFS round of 2026 as well as the prestigious position of "Noob of the Month". A shrouded spokesperson for the Cabal noted that "it would have been important for the Cabal, were it to exist, that the existing Cabal dynasty, especially one coming from such a quality genetic specimen such as UU, shall continue without disturbance. The Cabal is greatly pleased with UU and Mrs. UU for bolstering its numbers for the greater Cabal's good." Sporadic demonstration of support were noted around the Uncyclopedia realm, as supporters of the Cabal were seen with "DEAR UUette IS GREAT" and "ALL HAIL THE HEIR APPARENT" signs. So called "democratic"/"liberals"/"whiny bitches" protests were dealt with swiftly and efficiently. And from all of us in the UnSignpost here is one big congratulations UU, may your daughter have huge...errr..tracks of land.

Check out these pages! A very pointed question Something about penises? Damn this self-referential humour From our logs: sannse blocked EugeneKay with an expiry time of 2 hours ‎ (WILL YOU PLEASE STOP GETTING BLOCKED!) MrN9000 blocked 173.53.142.210 with an expiry time of 1 month ‎ (HOWARD STERN IS *NOT* THE GREATEST. Steve Davis is considerably better for example. As is Burt Reynolds.) Under user 80.239.242.142 with an expiry time of 1 month ‎ (me again - I see you're still a twat. have much longer to do something about that.) Biopic of the Week Puppy on the radio's signature has been a long and respectable member of the Uncyclopedia community for many months. Undergoing genetic manipulations and constant radiation bombardment, it now qualifies as a sentient entity by its own accord. The signature, expecting to be emancipated in the near future, indicated that it likes funny articles, men who are not afraid to be in touch with their feelings and long strolls on the beach. Mordillo's profound statement of the Week "I don't mind boobs" Source: User talk:MrN9000 Word of the Week Abodespotism IPA: /əˈbəʊˈdɛs.pɒt.ɪzəm/ the rule of a household despot; the exercise of absolute authority over the household. absolute power or control of all housemates; tyranny of shared living.(n) (eg. "While you live in my house you will abide by my rules.") Origin: Abode + Despotism Related forms: Ab⋅od⋅es⋅pot⋅ic  , Ab⋅od⋅esp⋅o⋅tis⋅tic, Ab⋅od⋅esp⋅o⋅tis⋅ti⋅cal, adjective Ab⋅od⋅esp⋅o⋅tist, noun Note: Often confused with Nespotism. Source: Undictionary Underwater Sea Monster Sighting of the Week Deep sea recent changes fishermen have been repeatedly reporting sightings of a huge scaled fire breathing creature, roaming the deep. Later on, the on call coast guard confirmed that this was a "once in a generation sighting of Ogopogo. Ogopogo, a mythical see creature than has been tamed by the Cabal many generations ago, has been lost for decades but now apparently decided to come back and check what's for dinner. Tsunami waves are expected all across the pond for the next few weeks. Administrative Notification of the Week Uncyclopedia's management would like to thank all participants of the 2nd Dubai Uncyclocon and would like to emphasize that it takes no responsibility for the excessive usage of forged passports. Please, people, try to be more discreet next time eh?

9001(bot)  20:54, Feb 28

UOTM

Can you clear this up for March when you get the chance? Nominally Humane! some time 02:46, 1/03/2010

Just curious

I was just wondering why File:Albacore.png was huffed, considering the rest of the content of Category:Pictures of naked girls. King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  04:24, March 1, 2010 (UTC)

There is no rule I just made a judgement call on that image. Basically a bit too much fanny showing and in a more obvious pornographic way. MrN 04:29, Mar 1

I'm assuming by "fanny" you mean the British definition and not the American. But I guess it's a matter of perspective--to me, personally, the women who are looking lustful and spreading their legs, even if censored, appear more sexual than a naked woman smiling. But then again I don't find nude art necessarily sexual, but do the word "fuck" even when used as an insult. Again, a difference in perspective. King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  04:50, March 1, 2010 (UTC)

That's why we have Sysops. MrN 09:49, Mar 1

Oh, is that why? I thought the purpose of Sysops was to have someone to blame for everything that goes wrong here so the rest of us don't have to take responsibility for our own actions. And then to whine at to fix everything when something goes wrong. You know, sort of like a parent. King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  19:50, March 1, 2010 (UTC)

That's about it. The advantage of being a Sysop is that sometimes (like a parent) you get to say "because I said so" and the associated megalomania kinda makes it all worthwhile. Oh, and the hot chicks that we obviously get. *cough* MrN 22:47, Mar 1

It's a tough job, but someone has to do it. Nominally Humane! some time 22:51, 1/03/2010

Oops!

And a super-wide sideways smile for the retouching ;) ~Formerly Annoying Crap 07:46, 1 March 2010

Potato chopper nom

Dude! Amazing! I probably won't get it, but the nom is great enough! You really are a cool cat. Thanks for all your tolerance and kindness. I really am very proud to be an Uncyclopedian. And the longer I'm here, the more I understand all my fellow Uncyclopedians. Specially, the special ones who are specially special, like Spike, opps! - MrN! Really. Cheers!--Funnybony 10:40, March 1, 2010 (UTC)

Don't thank me for the nomination. Aleister in Chains did that. He just forgot to put the template on your page. :P MrN 10:45, Mar 1

Funnybony, you won already. That was a February nom. I looked, nobody was nommed for Potatochopper or for the UnBooks, and like I did at the end of January, made my selection after studying the records for the UnBooks and for common sense on Potatochopper (you've done amazing work). This is not tainted. A nominee for an award for a month, (apparantly unlike the Writer of the Month which is a Hall of Fame award) should maybe be done late so the month's work can be assessed. That others did not nom anyone has nothing to do, imnho, with a legit nom for the month. If this is a new rule shouldn't it be stated on the page (and how would it be stated? Noms only allowed well before the complete month's data is in on who should win?), and not decided retroactively? A better rule may be that no noms are allowed until at least the 15th of a month, so a users work up to that point can be judged. Both of the worthy nominees deserve this, imnho, as in January and probably many other months. ~   11:11 1 3 mmx

It's not a new rule. We don't need one, I'm just doing this, this time. Dude you did not even put the template onto his page so he himself did not know he was nominated. You left it sooooooo late to nominate it was crazy, I doubt if anyone else even knew it had happened. I just thought we would have a better contest next month (this month) if people actually knew about it. Dude, Funnybony is a very good friend of mine on here. If I was trying do something unfair I would not do it to Funnybony. I'm sure he would like the option to win this award in a more conventional manner than if I were to have allowed what you did. I suspect Funnybony might consider winning it last month to be somewhat like tainting the award, and not really with the actual spirit behind what it is actually all about. MrN 11:22, Mar 1

Of course its not tainted. He deserved it for his work. Again, it is not my fault nobody else nominated. I think this question isn't even an argument. What occurred, as in January, is I went to vote, saw nobody was nommed, assessed the data for the month, and then choose who I thought was deserving. On the UnBooks, I looked through the entire months work, esp. on new articles, and read all the new UnBooks, and one stood out. No taint on any of these. I think a much bigger problem is the Writer of the Month, the language on the page should be changed as to who to nominate. It is a Hall of Fame award, and maybe the category should be so named. I didn't know Asshatter, but did study his contributions in considering my vote, and he hadn't written anything new in a year or so. A deserving Hall of Fame win, but far from Writer of the Month. Maybe an assessment of rules and wording on the award structure? Al, few minutes later

I don't agree. So if someone were to make a nomination on an open award 1 min before the closing time it's still valid? I did not see what happened in January. Uncyc does not work by predicate anyway. You did not add the templates to the user pages so I could (if I wanted) claim that the award was not correctly nominated anyway.

I don't think there is need to change the rules.

I'm not attacking you, I'm just doing what I think is in the spirit of the awards on this occasion.

Sorry. If you don't trust my judgement, consult another admin. MrN 11:40, Mar 1

Ah, you are tech. correct about the template, so there is the place we can both agree. And it would be nice to let Funnybony get his very well deserved praise this month. So let's let it stand, but nobody was wrong in this, except for the template. But the writer of the month rules do, imnho, need a change, towards the Hall of Fame statement maybe. Ok, nuff said. Al, a few minutes later

You were not "wrong" about the template. Plenty of nominations have been made before when people have forgotten to add them and it was not a problem. IMO this case is different because it was so late in the month, and only you knew about it (possibly). Had there suddenly been other people all voting after your nomination I would have allowed it. That's why I don't want to change the rules on that. You are wrong about WotM if you think it's just about how many FA templates you have on your user page. WotM is about how good a writer someone is, not how many articles you have been able to claim credit for. Some users contribute very good work to a very large number of articles but never actually start a new one, or claim enough credit to warent a HOS entry. HOS IS NOT WHAT UNCYC IS ALL ABOUT. Of that I am sure... As you said though... No one was wrong about anything here... I just did what I thought was best, and so did you. :) Have fun. MrN 12:22, Mar 1

Naught

Cool, Dude! Really! If I can get enough of a laugh out of you that you bother to help, then it's "Mission Accomplished" (ref. Dubya). As always, good edits, please continue. I mean, there's loads we can say about Naught. Cheers--Funnybony 19:16, March 1, 2010 (UTC)

There are probably not that many people who would have gotten that reference. Your articles do serve as an excellent platform for me to dispense my propaganda! ;) I'm off to the gym now. Honest! No really! I am!!! I will take a look at that other new article you did when I get back later tonight... I actually don't really need to bother watching the news on TV. I just wait to see what new stuff you will write! MrN 19:20, Mar 1

I was wondering, 1) Was there a Potato-chopper for Feb? and 2) Is there a Category for, like, "Article with an attitude problem"? or "article written with an attitude"? - because (nothing to do with me) but Local has the biggest attitude problem I was ever not about. Cheers!--Funnybony 20:42, March 1, 2010 (UTC)

Did you read the 'Potato chopper nom' section up there? That kinda explains what happened. Read it... Aleister did actually nom you in February, but because it was soooo late in the month, and only he voted for you (and there were no other nominations) I got on my combine harvester and drove is straight through the middle of the rule book. So... Nope, there was no winner of Potato-chopper for Feb. That's not something new, it's not always won. The big three awards are NotM, UotM and WotM. Someone always wins those, but the others sometimes miss a month or two. Sorry man... Basically I pissed on your bonfire. However, I do know what I'm doing. My reasons were complex and related to lots of different stuff in many different ways, which I'm sure you don't want me to have to fully explain. Just from your point of view... A lot more people will check out your work (cos you are still on the page for this month). You will still almost certainly win IMO (so long as you keep being as awesome as you have been), and you will also get a lot more comments about your work than just the one you had from Aleister. I'm hoping that you trust my judgement on this one man, but... Yea, I did piss on yours (and Aleister's) bonfire a little bit. Sorry. It will be better like this.  ;) Trust me.

Whoaaa!

Whoaaa..! OK, OK! You're, like, probably even Locals. IF I didn't trust my GURU, then I wouldn't be here amongst you all today. So, the proof of the pudding, and all that...

--Funnybony 09:28, March 2, 2010 (UTC)

As for the different awards, all we got are those listed on the bottom of any of the other award pages in that template. There are many other various "user" awards, but those are not kept updated much as only those listed on the template are handled by the admins. Only those on the template are "official" awards... Whatever that is worth/means... MrN 23:03, Mar 1

Bro, Actually I was wondering about a "Category", like "Article written in style of" or some such, but for Local - "Article with an attitude problem" or "Article with an attitude" or "Article with a terrible superiority complex" - is there such a category? Local NEEDS one.. Cheers!--Funnybony 09:40, March 2, 2010 (UTC)

Hmm, well I put "attitude" into the search box and came up with Bad_Nigger_Attitude and NWA. Maybe one of the categories used by either of those might be what you need. Get farmiliar with using the search tool dude. It will provide you with all kinds of useful stuff. You can search in only the mainspace, or only in article titles if you want to. "Go" and "Search" do something slightly different... MrN 10:09, Mar 2

WFMU Marathon on now

http://www.wfmu.org. They sometimes play music by somebody who's "misunderstood." Also I have a link at the top of my talk page--I hope that doesn't violate some policy here. The radio station is the oldest freeform station in America, and is not some big corporation--it's listener supported so it depends on donations. They are not a for profit organization, but a few paid people and a lot of volunteers. King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  21:34, March 1, 2010 (UTC)

So long as you are not getting paid to have it there it's not a problem for me. MrN 23:04, Mar 1

Cool. I'm actually one of the (admittedly minor) financial supporters, so in a way it's costing me. King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  23:39, March 1, 2010 (UTC)

Court Rules on Zombie unhuman Rights

Dude! UnNews:'Zombies' have free speech rights too, US court rules - THIS IS REAL NEWS (check the ref) - I kid you naught! Amazing, I just changed a very few words. Cheers!--Funnybony 23:14, March 1, 2010 (UTC)

I read both the actual article and yours... Wow. Yea, the authorities just keep trying to push the boundaries back to see what they can get away with. 3 steps forward, 2 steps back. It's called the "Totalitarian Tiptoe" dude. ;) ONLY Funnybony can save the world with his up to the second news reporting!!! I will see if I can toss a few sarcastic edits in. :) MrN 23:22, Mar 1

I call dibs on Audio. Nominally Humane! some time 23:45, 1/03/2010

Actually, going to the full logical conclusion, if we have dead people with free speech, then they should have the right to vote. If they have the right to vote, and they outnumber the living by a significant number, then the next president would most likely be someone who the majority can relate to. So the next president could potentially be a zombie. Nominally Humane! some time 23:47, 1/03/2010

America already had one of those from 2001 to 2008. King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  23:54, March 1, 2010 (UTC)

He was a puppet not a Zombie. Well, maybe a zombie puppet. MrN 23:57, Mar 1

Haven't you actually had a dead man winning the popular vote over there at some stage in the past? And a ficus? And Ronald Reagan? Nominally Humane! some time 00:58, 2/03/2010

Pitt the Embryo? I think there is a good chance that the Russians had a few leaders who had actually died, but they pretended they had not for a while... MrN 01:04, Mar 2

Dead people have won other elections (seriously--I remember someone died shortly before an election, but lots of people still voted for him), but I don't think for President. King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  01:08, March 2, 2010 (UTC)

[[1]], [[2]], and [[3]] - although I'm sure there are more. Echoes of the zombie vote already being felt? Nominally Humane! some time 01:36, 2/03/2010

Now that is some seriously fucked up shit about there. How the living hell did that happen? ... and several times! That's one heck of a lot of VERY stupid/ignorant people all in one place at one time. Wow. Seriously. MrN 02:44, Mar 2

By the way, just read the original and the Unc version--like it. King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  01:34, March 2, 2010 (UTC)

If you want to show someone you like their article... Don't bother telling them... Edit it! That is what people want. ;) MrN 01:36, Mar 2

When I'm not at work I'll do a few edits, and definitely do the audio. Nominally Humane! some time 02:31, 2/03/2010

OK, here's my ideas for edits. We'll start with a quote by Zombie Oscar Wilde, who gets chopped off in mid sentence by Zombie Chuck Norris--oh, this is beautiful. Then we'll have Zombie Russian Reversal, where the Zombie's not dead you are!--oh, funny stuff. Then.... King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  02:41, March 2, 2010 (UTC)

sob! we're, like, soooo lucky

When I saw the headline I was blown out! What? Then I thought about the Constitution, and freedom, and that even a Zombie has rights, and it brought tears to my eyes..SOB! And I realized how lucky I was to be a Zombie, ah, I mean, FREE!--Funnybony 09:34, March 2, 2010 (UTC)

Ra

Well, it was only a half archive... Nominally Humane! some time 23:17, 1/03/2010

Amun-Ra? Jesus Christ. Whatever next. Amen. MrN 23:26, Mar 1

Just Ra. Nominally Humane! some time 23:45, 1/03/2010

Who speaketh of Ra, mortals? • FreddThe Redd • • • 04:39 • Tuesday, 2-03-2010

Well, you know... Moses, David, Jesus, Muhammad, the Bible, the Torah, the Qur'an ... What? MrN 10:17, Mar 2

Non of those explicitly mentions Ra almighty. • FreddThe Redd • • • 12:42 • Tuesday, 2-03-2010

Maybe I can illuminate you with some words from our lord most high. For he is God's sun. He is the light of the world, for he will die for 3 days and after leaving his tomb he will rise again reborn. In the spring equinox he will pass over the equator. Amen (Ra). I consider myself a Christian if anyone cares MrN 13:16, Mar 2

It's Amon-Re actually, so yeah. Pants • FreddThe Redd • • • 13:47 • Tuesday, 2-03-2010

Question

what is the name of that template that tells the reader to check the talk page of an article before editing it? I need for use on the iCarly page. --Mn-z 03:20, March 2, 2010 (UTC)

{{SeeTalk}} maybe? MrN 03:23, Mar 2

that is the one I meant, ty. --Mn-z 03:44, March 2, 2010 (UTC)

64.62.196.35/stealth blanking

Always makes me laugh when they try to blank an article in little bits at a time like that. As though we're not going to notice! :-) Rabbi Techno kvetch Contribs FOXES 14:25, March 2, 2010 (UTC)

PS. When I say "makes me laugh," I don't mean as in rolling around on the floor gasping for breath - I'm not that sad. Rabbi Techno kvetch Contribs FOXES 14:26, March 2, 2010 (UTC)

The sneaky blankers... I sometimes let em work their way through to the end, just so as to waste a bit more time for em... :) Still I do think our vandals have more class than those of other wiki. */me feels proud* MrN 14:28, Mar 2

Heh, I do that too. Nice to let 'em know that their hard work takes a fraction of a second to repair - hopefully proves to them that to us (by which I mean admins and us users with rollback) they are as flies to wanton boys and all that. Also, you're right - our vandals are the best. Rabbi Techno kvetch Contribs FOXES 14:32, March 2, 2010 (UTC)

You know what the really, really, really classy and sneaky vandals do, don't you? They act like really productive, outstanding contributing users until they get made an admin. Then.... King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  23:01, March 3, 2010 (UTC)

That's why none of our admins are really productive, outstanding contributing users. MrN 23:05, Mar 3

On a related note, I find the fact that you needed to semi-protect this article quite amusing. --Mn-z 03:11, March 4, 2010 (UTC)

Pic for article

Would you be alright with this--the tiny picture 10px, The Babe Over There On The Right, for the "People Who Like to" page? She's got that happy light energy I was going for with the other pic, and the present ones I've either used or are finding don't have this lightness to them. Thanks, ~   1:08 3 3 2MX

From a sysop type as in "you can't have that" sort of thing? Sure, that's totally fine IMO. Tits are OK man. We have loads of em. It's the open gaping pussy shots which are more of an issue... As for if that's a good pic to use... I'm not sure. You will loose votes if it's for an FA. Enough people will care I suspect. Although many are happy with tits in articles, they often don't want em in an article which is on the front page... So my advice would be... Um... Maybe? MrN 01:15, Mar 3

Thanks. I think I'll try it, with a slight tweek to the caption. For FA status, the entire article is the point, and not just the pics, but the thing I'm going for in the last pick is nude or almost nude but totally happy and calm about it. This one might have more of that than the huffed one, and it was right under my nose (ah, not literally, well. . .) the whole time, as I've had it on my user page since I got here. There she was all the time! Al chainy a few minutes later

Oh Brother!

UnNews:FED Sues Uncyclopedia, Demands NWO Evidence Removed <---Here's one about YOU, er, kinda. Better see what you can do, cause this is your day! Yeah!--Funnybony 09:24, March 3, 2010 (UTC)

The vanity is shameless! Although we do appear to have The Powers That Be so I guess... Take a close look at that picture of me on there. That's Tom Cruise ya know! ;) Also... I really can't tell exactly who you are taking the piss out of here, so well done! MrN 11:11, Mar 3

Local almost ready for a poke at VFH (if you Nom it)

File:N9000-2.jpg

Whoaaa..! OK, OK! Daaa...

Dude! Of course, you only Nom what you want. But Local was the easiest article that ever came to me. From past experiences I think - maybe - this stands a chance in hell as a FA. If you think so, it would be great if you could double-check it. I kept to one quote (maximum) intro, as per my mentor, MrYou, who taught me that "quotes" and "lists" are a turn off on VFH.. and also Spike taught me the same lesson. The only articles with many quotes are the ones I wrote for fun, and not VFH. Also I moved the Gentleman Local badge to bottom as an anchor. If you can check it, and think it's got a chance on VFH, then there's nothing to lose as VFH has no registration fee. And I already passed initiation with you, and now I'm your bro, along with all other cool Uncyclopedians. But, I am contemplating an article on the "Uncyclopedian Initiation Proceedure" - which consists, basically, of 1) getting kicked repeatedly in the balls, 2) realizing you own self-worthlessness, 3) becoming adopted by a sysop who's a hipster (jeez! what Uncyclopedian is NOT a hipster?), and 4) Eating an entire "humble pie". If people can't take the initiation then they just do NOT belong, being unworthy swine, unfit for Uncycloperdia and genuine friendship with UnBrothers & Sisters. So, when it comes to joining Uncyclopedia, one MUST make it through the "belt line". Initiation Ceremony. Haa! It's true!! Hope you give Local a shot (but, noooooooot before you checking it for useless crap to delete or change).

I saw you had a ball editing the new FED Sues Unnews, that's a perfect medium for my cat, MrN!!--Funnybony 16:54, March 3, 2010 (UTC)

MrN Says... Funnybony write article... Funnybony put article onto Pee Review... FunnyBony do Pee Review of other person article on Pee Review... Funnybony repeat... Funnybony repeat... Funnybony repeat... Funnybony become better Funnybony.

User:Why do I need to provide this?/IC Batman Begins User:Why do I need to provide this?/sig10 03:42, March 4, 2010 (UTC)

'Scuse me

Politely clears throat. Is there a friendly soul around here with an equally useful bot who could take this and make it appear on numerous talk pages?

Also, can you tell Why? to subst that bloomin' template above? Only when you go to click the edit button on that section, you almost post your message on his bloody template page, then you get all annoyed and want to find someone to ban. Fortunately, I have a cunning plan in that regard... --UU - natter 11:01, Mar 5

This is Why?--I know how to subst for my signature, but not for another template. What can I do to fix it? King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  22:20, March 5, 2010 (UTC)

{{subst:mytemplate}} ~ 22:23, March 5, 2010 (UTC)

Thanks, but where do I put that code? Please don't tell me I have to go to everyone of the 40 or so pages I posted it on and change it....I know, that's what you're going to say, isn't it? King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  22:24, March 5, 2010 (UTC)

On whichever page you want to spill the entire code of the template - to avoid the problem you had with Douglaspanda. Put - {{subst:user:whydoIneed/ic}} on this page and it will place the entirety of the code here. After that, changes in the original template will not effect any pages on which the template was subst'd. This is why we subst the welcome message as well. ~ 22:28, March 5, 2010 (UTC)

All right, I think I see what happened. I actually purposely set it up so that when I changed the message on the template, it would change on every page on which it was posted. I did that so if I caught an error later, I wouldn't have to rewrite it on every one of those pages (I had to do that before, and it was a pain). But I didn't realized trying to edit it on someone else's user page would edit it on mine. So what I'll try to do is add a message to the top of the template telling people how to add comments. Hopefully, that will work. King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  22:35, March 5, 2010 (UTC)

I did it--does that work? Also I'm not implying your notes were in any way nasty; they were very helpful. King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  22:46, March 5, 2010 (UTC)

Moving Creationism

I know what you said about moving Transformers but, er, um, could you move Uncyclopedia:Imperial Colonization/Creationism and its talk page to Creationism? There are a number of reasons it's critically important to preserve the history--checking to see who actually did contribute and what those contributions were, double checking on who gets half credit if it gets featured, seeing what worked in setting up a colonization and what didn't, etc. I tried looking through the history of previous colonizations so I could learn from what was done before, and never did fine much of it, which means I probably repeated a lot of the old mistakes. The only way I thought of keeping the history without an admin doing that huffing/moving/unhuffing magic that you do is to cut and paste the IC version onto the current version, and then posting a BIG NOTICE in the talk page that the rest of the history is on one of the IC pages and linking to it. But that would split the history up which I'd prefer not to do if it's not too much trouble to do your magic. What think? King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  23:20, March 5, 2010 (UTC)

UnSignpost 4th March 2010 (your calendar is wrong)

The Uncyclopedia UnSignpost

The Newspaper That Replaces Analysis With Flashy Graphics!

Mar 4th, 2010 • Issue 78 • Snorting the drug of Truth from the toilet seat of News

Controversy over Uncyclopedian leads journalist to public outcry By Him again The "of the Month" nominations and celebrations have been marred recently by drama circulating in forums, talk pages and on vote pages in various areas. Fortunately, whenever and wherever a drama has reared its ugly head an Unsignpost reporter has been there to cover it. Why do I need to provide this? is now experiencing his second week of not having been nominated for anything. After mentioning to a respected editor that he had been nominated for at least one award for almost every day he had been part of the Uncyclopedia community, he bemoaned the fact that he had not been nominated for anything this month. "I've been nommed for something EVERY SINGLE DAY of the five months I've been here--until this month. I'm not nommed for anything. It's pretty depressing, really." Why? complained As a result of this complaining, Why? was then nominated for an award that had been more respected in the breach then in the observance - to paraphrase the bard - Nomination of the Month. When, after a series of events, Roman Dog Bird felt obliged to nominate Aleister in Chains' Nomination for NOTM of PuppyOnTheRadio's nomination for NOTM of Why do I need to provide this?'s nomination of PuppyOnTheRadio for UGotM, he simply stated "This is a stupid award." Meanwhile, at UotM, discussion over the number of awards given out led to an obvious discussion about the worth of RotM and UotM, which of course led, as all conversational roads do, to the hugely popular and debatably talented Dan Brown, not to be confused with Dan Kwon, as we aren't quite sure who he is. The debate got unexpectedly heated when a talented and handsome editor suggested that another less talented editor should perform carnal and bestial acts with random household appliances. Remember to cast your vote in AotM, PotM, RotM, NotM and WotM, or nominate the uncyc member that has impressed you most in these areas. And of course, always remember Mordillo's words, "This one is for people who made Uncyclopedia better by cleaning up shop, helping people and allow Uncyclopedia to wobble around without falling over." Vote today. Or tomorrow - depending on if you have the time. Vote for Sandwiches suspended, Uncyclopedians confused By UU Confusion reigned supreme in Uncyclopedia this month, as the ever-popular Vote for Sandwiches page was inexplicably protected, and changed to something that appears to be called "Vote for Sysops". Historical investigation by our fearless mascot DogNewspaper has revealed that this is actually the traditional process by which new sysops are selected on Uncyc - which came as a surprise to many editors, particularly the newer ones, many of whom didn't realise new sysops could be selected. And with the current vote count standing at 6 in favour, and with few regularly active sysops left to vote, it looks like the chances are that there will be new sysops by the end of this month - so time to start deciding who you're gonna nominate! Who will be the next to have a thousand IPs ask them on their talkpage why they deleted their useless little one-line stub? Stay tuned to find out?

Check out these pages! Heh - poopy Haven't we been here before? Hang on - writing articles? There's an idea... From our logs: 02:36, 1 March 2010 MrN9000 (Talk | contribs) blocked 153.107.33.156 (Talk) with an expiry time of 3 months ‎ (Cyberbullying: I'm guessing that's what you are trying to do. If so, you are shit at it.) 14:57, 2 March 2010 Todd Lyons (Talk | contribs) blocked {contr|207.144.173.198}} (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 month ‎ (Anti-semitism + stupidity = my foot + your butt) 19:05, 2 March 2010 Zim ulator (Talk | contribs) blocked 66.211.39.160 (Talk) with an expiry time of infinite ‎ (Vandal: Why don't you go to concervapedia, and ask them if Jesus loves you. I say, He doesn't.) 18:32, 2 March 2010 Under user (Talk | contribs) blocked 87.114.246.12 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 day ‎ (blanking by installments is still blanking. and blanking makes baby jesus cry. it also pisses me off, and that's far worse.) Biopic of the Week Is it actually legal to have two Portsmouth fans on the same wiki? The subject of this week's spotlight, Nachlader cared not a jot for this important question when he joined Codeine as Uncyc's second Pompey fan. Nachlader is an occasional drunk poster in the dump, a former NotM and RotM and, lest we forget, the writer of some very fine featured articles. Shame no-one can spell his username though. Old-school featured article of the month Smells Like Teen Spirit was a monthly celebrity scratch and sniff magazine produced by Grunge Publications in the early 1990's. Beckoning a time of true periodical change, young women aged eighteen to twenty-two decided that merely looking upon their favourite celebrities no longer hot-buttered their ever-so-proverbial muffins and collectively proclaimed, "Here we are... now entertain us." Perhaps it was something in the way these determined ladies phrased this proclamation, or simply the fact that Grunge perceived a lucrative sliver of the niche market that was girls who wanted to smell things, but the call was swiftly answered with a glossy, uniquely olfactory experience hailed as "a Nirvana for the nostrils" that became the unofficial scent of Generation X.

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