User:Sapplerx/Anniversaries

Basically Uncyc's version of Anniversaries but I decided to make one for my own!

(Yes I stole some from Wikipedia.)

January

January 1: Kick a Polar Bear in the Ass Day

• 45 BC - Romans find the first polar bear, kicks it in the ass.
• 1773 - The hymn "Amazing Grace" gets released. It is about a polar bear named Grace.
• 1959 - Fidel Castro takes control of Havana and kicks a polar bear, marking the end of the Cuban Revolution.
• 1983 - The Internet begins as we know it. The first image shown? A polar bear being kicked.

Notable births: Betsy Ross (b. 1752) - Barry Goldwater (b. 1909) - J.D. Salinger (b. 1919)

Notable deaths: Hank Williams (d. 1953) - Shirley Chisholm (d. 2005) - David Stern (d. 2020)

January 2: Buffet Day

• 1777 - American forces open the first buffet in Trenton, New Jersey, which became a trap for the British.
• 1680 - Trunajaya dies due to multiple food items being stuffed at once by rebels.
• 1941 - A cathedral in Cardiff, Wales gets heavily damaged by German food.
• 1967 - Ronald Reagan gets sworn in as governor of California and opens the first buffet there.

Notable births: Bob Marshall (b. 1901) - Barry Goldwater (b. 1909) - Kate Bosworth (b. 1983)

Notable deaths: William de St-Calais (d. 1096) - James Longstreet (b. 1821) - Thomas Monson (d. 2018)

January 3: Chocolate-Covered Cherry Day

• 1777 - George Washington and his troops win by chopping down British-owned cherry trees.
• 1911 - A gun fight over chocolate-covered cherries leaves two dead.

• 1973 - The Yankees were brought by a group of investors for chocolate-covered cherries.
• 1990 - The deposed strongman of Panama surrendered to American forces so that he can enjoy his favorite treat. It never happened.

Notable births: Mel Gibson (b. 1956) - Michael Schumacher (b. 1961) - Eli Manning (b. 1981)

Notable deaths: Hitler's father (d. 1903) - James MacCormack (d. 1975) - Qasem Soleimani (d. 2020)

January 4: Spaghetti Day

• 1847 - The Texas Rangers become the first owners of the Spaghetti Gun.
• 1909 - Aeneas Mackintosh escapes death by fleeing in a boat made of spaghetti.
• 1912 - The Spaghetti Scouts are established through a royal charter.

• 2006 - Ariel Sharon suffers from a stroke after eating too much spaghetti.

Notable births: Louis Braille (b. 1809) - Till Lindemann (b. 1963) - David Berman (b. 1967)

Notable deaths: Albert Camus (d. 1960) - Junko Furuta (d. 1989) - Stuart Scott (d. 2015)

January 5: Whipped Cream Day

• 1922 - Ernest Shackleton dies after he bleeds out whipped cream.
• 1941 - Australian and British troops defeat Italian troops with the power of whipped cream in Libya.

• 1968 - The Prague Spring begins with the entire city covered in whipped cream.
• 1970 - An earthquake kills so much people in China that no one knew how powerful it is.

Notable births: Marilyn Manson (b. 1969) - Bradley Cooper (b. 1975) - Deepika Padukone (b. 1986)

Notable deaths: I already mentioned him already, why are you asking for it again? (d. 1922) - Calvin Coolidge (d. 1933) - Amelia Earhart (d. 1939)

January 6: Shortbread Day

• 1060 - Harold II becomes the final king of England. Except he's not the last one.
• 1907 - Maria Montessori opens her first school based on her teaching policies which were proven extremely powerful.

• 1960 - A plane travelling to New York City to Miami crashed, possibly because the pilot accidentally snuck in a bomb.
• 2021 - Donald Trump commands his army to attack the Capitol, surprisingly a few people died.

Notable births: Joan of Arc (b. 1412) - Syd Barrett (b. 1946) - Mr. Bean (b. 1955)

Notable deaths: The guy who invented Braille who was born on Spaghetti Day (d. 1852) - Teddy Roosevelt (d. 1919) - Dizzy Gillepsie (d. 1993)

January 7: Watch Paint Dry Day

• 1558 - The French town of Calais no longer becomes an English town.

• 1797 - The flag of Italy was created after all 3 colors of paint were dried. Only one person came to see the spectacle, which was the designer of the flag.
• 1939 - Francium was discovered in a wall of dry paint in a gallery in France.
• 1955 - Marian Anderson becomes the first African-American woman of color to watch paint dry at The Met.

Notable births: Nicolas Cage (b. 1964) - Jeremy Renner (b. 1971) - Bipasha Basu (b. 1979)

Notable deaths: Catherine of Aragon (d. 1536) - Nikola Tesla (d. 1943) - Hirohito (d. 1989)

January 8: Bubble Bath Day

• 1904 - The first branch of the Chicago Library System opens by leaking out tons of soap bubbles.
• 1918 - Woodrow Wilson shares his fourteen points about how people in Europe should have a bubble bath properly.
• 1978 - Harvey Milk becomes the first gay man to be in the government.
• 1979 - An oil tanker exploded in tons of bubbles, trapping 47 people in them.

Notable births: Stephen Hawking (b. 1942) - David Bowie (b. 1947) - Apparently, that was Aaliyah's husband (b. 1967)

Notable deaths: Galileo Galileo Figaro (d. 1642) - Eli Whitney (d. 1825) - Terry-Thomas (d. 1990)

January 9: Apricot Day

• 1874 - The Japanese police system forms during an argument about peaches.
• 1909 - Ernest Shackleton plants the British flag in the South Pole.

• 1916 - Istanbul nearly gets captured during the end of the Gallipoli Campaign.
• 2005 - ABBA gets elected as Palestine's leader.

Notable births: Crystal Gayle (b. 1951) - Wait, her name is Catherine? (b. 1982) - Nina Dobrev (b. 1989)

Notable deaths: Marco Polo (d. 1324) - Makiti Napanangka (d. 2011) - Bob Saget (d. 2022)

January 10: Throw Your Houseplants Away Day

• 976 - After the death of his father, Basil II decided to throw away his plant which had the same name as him.
• 1430 - The most expensive award in the world for most plants thrown gets established by the Catholic Church.
• 1917 - After being stranded for several months, seven survivors were found alive in a jungle full of thrown away houseplants.
• 1927 - The classic cult film Plantopolis premiers in Germany.

Notable births: Ra Ra Rasputin (b. 1869) - Rod Stewart (b. 1945) - George Foreman (b. 1949)

Notable deaths: Carl Linnaeus (d. 1707) - Samuel Colt (d. 1862) - Ziggy Stardust (d. 2016)

January 11: Step in a Puddle Day

• 1055 - The Byzantine Empire elects its first and only emperor. After that, there was no monarchy.

• 1914 - The Karluk sinks after hitting a large puddle.
• 1914, again - Someone steps on the largest puddle of all time, which turned out to be a volcano. 58 deaths were caused.
• 2003 - Jon Burge was revealed to have made more than one million drug puddles, which actually turned out to be a mix of placebos and fake snow.

Notable births: This historic government official made popular by Lin Manuel-Miranda (b. 1755) - A government official whose actual name is Socrates (b. 1814) - Emile Heskey (b. 1978)

Notable deaths: Francis Scott Key (d. 1843) - Edmund Hilary (d. 2008) - Ariel Sharon after he got resurrected (d. 2014)

January 12: Do Not Kiss A Ginger Day

• 475 - Basiliscus becomes Byzantine emperor after Zeno gets exiled for kissing a red-headed woman.
• 1659 - A random fort at Allahabad gets surrendered.
• 1808 - John Rennie tries to defend St. Mary's church from demolition, only to find out that it had already been demolished a year earlier by gingers.

• 1921 - In order to make baseball popular again, every single baseball team owner decided to elect a Supreme Court judge to serve it as the commissioner.

Notable births: Rush Limbaugh (b. 1951) - Howard Stern (b. 1954) - Mr. Amazon (b. 1964)

Notable deaths: Agatha Christie (d. 1976) - Nikolai Podgorny (d. 1983) - William Peter Blatty (d. 2017)

January 13: Blame Someone Else and Get Away With It Day

• 1797 - The British blames French ships for a naval battle and gets away with it.
• 1842 - William Brydon arrives at Jalalabad with 14,000 other people after they were blamed for a war.

• 1910 - The first radio broadcast of two men fighting at a British pub was heard. It is unknown who punched first.
• 1968 - Johnny Cash releases the first album recorded from a prison after he got arrested for a bank robbery that he was blamed on.

Notable births: Sibyl Hathaway (b. 1884) - Art Ross (b. 1885) - Maon Kurosaki (b. 1988)

Notable deaths: Wyatt Earp (d. 1929) - James Joyce (d. 1941) - Siegfried (d. 2021)

January 14: Dress Up Your Pet Day

• 1301 - Andrew III dies without any pets wearing costumes.

• 1761 - Afghan-owned pets defeated Maratha-owned pets with French-designed costumes.
• 1900 - Tosca, an opera based on another opera of the same name premieres in Rome. The lead was a dog in a dress.
• 1933 - The England cricket team cheats with their pets during a Test match against Australia.

Notable births: Benedict Arnold (b. 1741) - You might not know who he is, really (b. 1950) - Jess Fishlock (b. 1987)

Notable deaths: Ladislaus II (d. 1163) - Darren Shahlavi (d. 2015) - Fred Rogers' wife (d. 2017)

January 15: Strawberry Ice Cream Day

• 1857 - In an attempt to murder Europeans, a bakery in Hong Kong tries to lace arsenic in bread, which failed.

• 1919 - Two socialists were tortured and murdered after selling strawberry ice cream for free in the streets of Germany.
• 1919, again - The Boston Molassacre happens, causing a sweet and syrupy mess that can still be smelled during the summer.
• 2001 - Wikipedia is born. You should know that already.

Notable births: MLK (b. 1929) - Bent Sharp Hero (b. 1984) - Drew Brees (b. 1979)

Notable deaths: Rosa "Actually Polish" Luxembourg (d. 1919) - The Black Dahlia (d. 1947) - Bill Masterton (d. 1968)

January 16: Hot & Spicy Food Day

• 27 BC - Gaius Octavianus takes control of the entire month of August.
• 1920 - The precursor to the United Nations is founded, focusing on peace and security, only to fall apart in the next few years or so.
• 1942 - During World War II, a Filipino decided to use hot sauce as a weapon against Axis Powers, which granted him the Medal of Honor.

• 1991 - The Golf War begins starting with an assault on Iraqi forces.

Notable births: Kate Mosse (b. 1974) - AAAAAA! (b. 1979) - Albert Pooholes (b. 1980)

Notable deaths: Carole Lombarde (d. 1942) - Bernard Lee (d. 1981) - Gene Cernan (d. 2017)

January 17: Forget About Last Year Day

• 38 BC - Octavious divorces his wife that he married last year and married another woman.

• 1524 - Italian explorer Giovanni di Verrazzano find the sea route to the Pacific Ocean, only to realize that he went there last year.
• 1912 - Robert Scott Falcon goes to the South Pole. He realizes that someone beat him last year.
• 1991 - The Golf War really begins this time, after failing to yesterday.

Notable births: The Grinch (b. 1962) - Obama's wife that you might know (b. 1964) - Dwayne Dwyane Wade (b. 1982)

Notable deaths: Rutherford B. Hayes (d. 1893) - This chess grandmaster is apparently antisemitic. Who's Bobby Fischer? (d. 2008) - Greg Plitt (d. 2015)

January 18: Thesaurus Day

• 1871 - Wilhelm I becomes the emperor of the German Empire because every single state said so.
• 1943 - The Red Army eases the German siege, slightly.
• 1951 - Construction of the only United Nations memorial ever made begins.

• 1958 - The first Thesaurus arrives in a zoo near Maxton, North Carolina.

Notable births: Alexandra Eggster (b. 1882) - Cary Grant (b. 1904) - Drax the Destroyer (b. 1969)

Notable deaths: Tamar the Great (d. 1213) - John "Most Forgettable President of All Time" Tyler (d. 1862) - Lusia Harris (d. 2022)

January 19: Popcornography Day

• 1795 - Popcornography gets invented in the Batavian Republic.
• 1920 - The American Association of Popcornography gets founded.

• 1935 - Popcorn briefs, a new style of men's underwear at the time, gets sold for the first time.
• 1945 - Soviet forces infiltrate a ghetto, but no one was living there, just corn.

Notable births: Nicholas Colasanto (b. 1924) - Two sticks of butter (b. 1947) - Jenson Button (b. 1980)

Notable deaths: Snow White (d. 1997) - Bam Bam Bigelow (d. 2007) - Chief Keef's older cousin (d. 2018)

January 20: Cheese Haters Day

• 1156 - According to legend, Lalli killed the Bishop of Finland with a cheese sword. It was the Bishop's weakness.
• 1265 - The earliest form of Parliament appears in Britain. The first law discussed was to ban cheese.
• 1843 - The first Prime Minister of Brazil gets elected, his first law was to outlaw cheese in the country.

• 1885 - The Anti-Cheese Coaster becomes the first rollercoaster to be made, its purpose was to remove cheesy smells from its riders.

Notable births: Sarah Conlon (b. 1926) - Buzz Lightyear (b. 1930) - Dwight Schrute (b. 1966)

Notable deaths: George V (d. 1865) - Kalakaua (d. 1891) - Audrey Hepburn (d. 1993)

January 21: Sweatpants Day

• 1326 - Oxford College gets established in England.
• 1793 - After being found guilty, Louis XVI gets beheaded because the French thought that he was the biggest dick of all time in the country.
• 1968 - A plane that was supposed to create the most radioactive poison ever made crashes near Greenland, causing radiation.
• 1976 - The Concord Grape begins flights to basically anywhere you could imagine.

Notable births: Ethan Allen (b. 1738) - The Lost Cause (b. 1824) - The Dream (b. 1963)

Notable deaths: Seriously? Again? (d. 1793) - Lenin (d. 1924) - Cecil B. DeMille (d. 1959)

January 22: Hot Sauce Day

• 1273 - The Sultan of Granada first gets bestowed by Muhammad after his father's death.

• 1946 - The Republic of Tabasco declares its independence from Iran.
• 1970 - The Boeing 747 enters service for the first time.
• 1973 - A landmark decision for abortion gets decided, only to be struck down 39 years later.

Notable births: Lev Landau (b. 1908) - Diane Lane (b. 1965) - Mayor Fieri of Flavortown (b. 1968)

Notable deaths: Queen Victoria (d. 1901) - LBJ (d. 1973) - The Australian Batman (d. 2008)

January 23: Pi(e) Day in January

• 393 - Theodosius I makes his 8 year old son the emperor instead of him.
• 1264 - A settlement was created to favor Louis IX, which didn't help.
• 1368 - The Ming Dynasty starts existing and continues to exist forever.
• 1793 - Poland gets partitioned for a second time.

Notable births: The guy with large handwriting (b. 1736) - Hsu Tain-tsair (b. 1953) - Louisa Cadamuro (b.1987)

Notable deaths: Salvador Dali (d. 1989) - Ernie Banks (d. 2015) - Lari White (d. 2018)

January 24: Peanut Butter Day

• 914 - Egypt fails to get invaded.
• 1458 - The Estates decide to make someone's 14-year-old nephew King of Hungary.
• 1848 - Peanut butter was discovered in a mine in California.

• 1924 - Petrograd gets renamed after Vladimir Lenin because Peter the Great was already dead.

Notable births: Hadrian (b. 76) - Frederick the Great (b. 1746) - Mischa Barton (b. 1986)

Notable deaths: The Fat Controller from Thomas and Friends (d. 1965) - The man who started Scientology (d. 1986) - Thurgood Marshall (d. 1993)

January 25: Irish Coffee Day

• 1533 - Anne Boleyn, already pregnant with the queen, marries her second husband.

• 1918 - Ukraine becomes independent, and then becomes communist.
• 1971 - The Second Republic of Uganda begins after a coup d'etat.
• 1990 - Avianca Flight 52 runs out of Irish Coffee and crashes into a village, resulting in the deaths of 73 people.

Notable births: Leo IV (b. 750) - Robert Burns (b. 1759) - Witold Lutosławski (b. 1913)

Notable deaths: Adele Astaire (d. 1981) - Mikhail Suslov (d. 1982) - John Smith, the actor (d. 1995)

January 26: Peanut Brittle Day

• 1788 - Europeans settle into Australia for the first time. Actually, it was just the British.
• 1945 - Audie Murphy wins a Metal of Honor by engaging in every single action that the American Army did.
• 1950 - India becomes a republic, not yet an independent country.
• 1998 - Bill Clinton denies having sex with Monica Lewinsky and staining her dress.

Notable births: Bob Uecker (b. 1934) - Ellen "I'm Not Actually Nice" DeGenerate (b. 1958) - Wayne Gretzky (b. 1961)

Notable deaths: Nelson Rockefeller (d. 1979) - George Habash (d. 2008) - Cody Kobe and Gianna Bryant (d. 2020)

January 27: Chocolate Cake Day

• AD 98 - At this point the Roman Empire reached maximum extent. Or whatever, I haven't learned something about the Roman Empire in years.

• 1973 - The Vietnam War ends, only to resume a few years later.
• 1980 - Apollo 1 fails to launch.
• 2011 - A white dwarf sets a world record for having the hottest temperature.

Notable births: Edward of Angoulême (b. 1365) - Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart (b. 1756) - Sasaki Toichi (b. 1886)

Notable deaths: An appropriately named plumber (d. 1910) - Suharto (d. 2008) - J.D. Salinger, again (d. 2010)

January 28: Kazoo Day

• 1069 - Northern England gets subjugated.
• 1568 - Local communities in Transylvania can now elect preachers.
• 1958 - Lego bricks start being created with plastic-free plastic.

• 1986 - Challenger gets disintegrated within 73 seconds into its 10th mission.

Notable births: Rick Warren (b. 1954) - Nicolas Sarkozy (b. 1955) - The Y in *NSYNC (b. 1977)

Notable deaths: Charlemagne (d. 814) - Henry VIII (d. 1547) - W.B. Yeats (d. 1939)

January 29: Bad Temper Day

• 1845 - Edgar Allan Poe publishes his first poem, "The Temper".
• 1856 - Queen Victoria introduces a cross named after herself, inspired by a temper tantrum she had yesterday.
• 1891 - The only Queen of Hawaii ascended to the throne.
• 1943 - The Battle of Rennell Island begins, don't ask how I got this fact.

Notable births: William McKinley (b. 1843) - Frederick Delius (b. 1862) - Oprah herself (b. 1954)

Notable deaths: That one Hispanist with a very good memory (d. 1859) - George III (d. 1920) - Robert Frost (d. 1963)

January 30: Bubble Wrap is Fun Day

• 1649 - Charles I gets beheaded, for fucks sake.

• 1826 - The first bridge made of bubble wrap opens in Wales.
• 1847 - San Francisco becomes an actual settlement.
• 1900 - William Goebel dies before he even took office after choking on bubble wrap.

Notable births: Richard Cheney (b. 1941) The American British Psycho (b. 1974) - Fez from That '70s Show (b. 1980)

Notable deaths: That American flag girl again (d. 1848) - Nukes (d. 1948) - Puck (d. 2018)

January 31: yad sdrawkcaB

• 1862 - .derevocsid steg frawd kcalb tsrif ehT

• 1996 - .sdrawpu gnitaolf ,napaJ ni derevocsid steg temoc A
• 2000 - .naecO cificaP eht morf sesir enalp A
• 2010 - .eciffo xob eht revo ekat arodnaP morf sneila fo hcnub A

Notable births: enihsnuS .rM (b. 1931) - notgnihsaW yrreK (b. 1977) - CNYSN* ni N ehT (b. 1981)

Notable deaths: seman tsrif eerhT (d. 1788) - itreblA leunaM (d. 1811) - otavoL imeD toN (d. 2018)