Guy Fieri
Guy Fieri (fee-airy), born Guy Ferrari, is the ambassador, king, and (disputed) god of Flavortown since 1776. He is known for being the first man to populate Antarctica, and it didn't end well.
| King of the Flavorians, Guy Fieri | |
|---|---|
|
|
| Personal info | |
| Nationality | Flavorian, "legally" American |
| Date of birth | January 22, 1968 |
| Place of birth | Columbus, Undecided, Flavortown. |
| Date of death | Never |
| Place of death | Never |
| First Lady | Lori Fieri |
| Political career | |
| Order | 1st and Only King |
| Vice President | Gordon Ramsay |
| Prime Minister | Alton Brown |
| Term of office | 1776– |
| Preceded by | no one |
| Succeeded by | never |
| Political party | Flavortown Party |
| Penis nickname | n/a |
Birth[edit | edit source]
Guy Fieri was born in the Undecided division of Flavortown, or what Wikipedia and American crackheads would call "Ohio", in 1968.
Last name controversy[edit | edit source]
Due to his last name being in copyright from the Ferrari, he changed it to Fieri. Due to contrary belief, "Fieri" doesn't not come from "fiery", that is just a coincidence.
Political Uprising[edit | edit source]
When Guy Fieri was 20 years old, he came up with his own political party of the Flavortown Party. The origin for the FTP comes from the Communist belief, but Guy got rid of what didn't work in the first place "the art of sharing." It worked in a matter of weeks with every Flavorian believed the FTP by March 3.
Automatic Election[edit | edit source]
After his genius political party FTP, he ran in the first Flavortown election and won by a landslide (only 3 people voted). He was elected to be in office until, and I quote, "the end of the world" which would've been next Tuesday, but God liked Triple D so changed it to an undecided date.
DDD and Flavortown[edit | edit source]
In 2007, Guy Fieri started a new show with him reviewing food from around, to tell Americans about Flavortown and how it's real. But, due to reasons allowing him to show Flavortown on camera, he just mentioned it. But still, Flavortown got a huge boom in tourism because of that. Everybody liked the show so much, that they automatically gave Guy another reelection.
Guys Grocery Games[edit | edit source]
His other shows, (see title above), is him throwing these totally random challenges at chefs he has kidnapped. He is best known for giving them obscure challenges and flipping out when they did not do it right. Challenges include a $2 budget (and everything in that store where it's filmed is minimum $2), 5 minute cook times, and only using 0.7 items to cook. This leads many to believe he has autism.
Complications/Controversies with the American Government[edit | edit source]
Arrest[edit | edit source]
Guy was arrested for 8 days because he, in their opinion, "claimed Flavortown was real" which it is.
Collusions with the Mafia[edit | edit source]
Forgot to pay Tony and was nearly killed by the Italian mafia. Tony later apologized remembering how much he likes Triple D.
2019 Trump Incident[edit | edit source]
Voted for Joe Biden for 2020 to which President Dumbass said, "This guy made a yuge miscake... mis... mihs-kah-kay?"
Alton Brown Controversy[edit | edit source]
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Alton Brown is the current PM of Flavortown, but to most elder Flavorians, he was the Flavorian Maniac. Most Flavorians tried to arrest Alton for bank robbery, despite the fact he never did.[1] But yes, Prime Minister Brown is here to stay.
Flavortown War[edit | edit source]
Based on the "Flavorian Historia", a bible-like book, about the history of Flavortown, states that once, Guy fought off about 40 American soldiers with nothing but a pocket-knife. Historians are unable to debunk the claim.
Fieria: The Antarctic City that never came[edit | edit source]
Guy Fieri in 2013 decided to populate the frozen wasteland of Antarctica that wasn't penguins. He entitled it Fieria.
Year 0ne[edit | edit source]
In the first year of Fieria, the population was 410. Including future president Barack Obama.
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Ye4r Tw0[edit | edit source]
In the second year, the population dropped to 221. It dropped from the fact that Guy forgot to bring more food.
Y34r Thr33[edit | edit source]
In year three the population dropped to 1, Barack Obama. But left before the frost came.
In summary, Fieria fucking sucked.
International Ties[edit | edit source]
Jesusland - Due to God liking him
Greece - Due to it sounding like "Grease"
France - From French Fries
Czechia - He actually wanted a check
- ↑ via awaywithaltonbrown.gov.ft