User:TheVeryHungryPotato/Main Page(editable) for Hyenas and Birds
From today's biggest sewdopainis
WASHINGTON, D.C. – Following air strikes on Caracas and the successful capture of Venezuelan president Nicolás Maduro, Donald Trump was given yet another Nobel Peace Prize for his commendable work of putting an end to the war he started approximately three hours ago. This tallies his Nobel prizes to fifteen so far (three in one year) which is an accomplishment as it is only a yearly award.
Chief of Staff Susie Wiles lamented the lack of shelf space to store all of Trump's numerous Nobel Peace Prizes (all of them legitimate and certified Swedish). This was the real motivation for adding a ballroom extension to the White House, in part to throw lavish parties in a time of economic struggle, but also for a place to store all of Trump's Nobel prizes.
Marco Rubio, a devout Christian, was seen pacing the grounds of what was once the White House Rose Garden (now a ballroom storage space for prizes), masturbating furiously to an AI-generated image of Havana burning. (Full article...)
Did your sewdopainis get hard?
- ... that hand transplant patients (Pictured) celebrate by masturbating?
- ... that Abraham Lincoln was an accomplished skateboarder?
- ... that recent advances in nanobiotechnology have led to advanced, implantable music players capable of holding up to three seconds of low-quality MP3 audio?
- ... that the The Root of All Evil is fishsticks?
- ... that Ben Stiller's face makes everything funny?
- ... that Earth has 1 sextillion grains of sand?
- ... that the amount of cats in the area is directly proportionate to the distance from the Hot Dog factory?
- ... that if you were to stack up all the elephants on Earth, those elephants would die?
In the clowaka or on the sewdopainis
- Starmer announces plans to make tweeting illegal in the UK (Pictured)
- Trump given yet another Nobel Peace Prize for ending war he started 3 hours ago
- Kansas City Chiefs impulsively fire Missouri as home state, moving to actual Kansas after missing playoffs
- UnNews wishes to all users a merry December Holiday
- Dick Van Dyke is 100, bitches!
- ICE spotted stealing everyone's ice cream in America
- North Sentinelese discover fire, accidentally burn down entire island
- Elon Musk: "Cancel Netflix! I don't care if Max wakes up."
- 6 or 7 buildings burn in Hong Kong
- Labour approval hits record low during Starmer premiership, PM resorts to "getting down with the youth"
- The New York Yankees now fucking suck
Ongoing: The wait for GTA VI and Spaceballs 2 • Rich New Yorkers fleeing Mamdanistan • Larry Sanger's war on Wikipedia • Non-Bears invading Tennessee • Nanny state officials breaching people's privacy rights via enforcing social media bans and digital ID under the pretext of "think of the children!" • Venezuelans unsure whether to freak out or celebrate • Non-playoff NFL teams firing their coaches • Jim and John Harbaugh family vacation in Cancun
Recent deaths: Doug Dimmadome • Zed's dead, baby (He was also the bad guy in The Mask) • Animal Farm • Rob Reiner • Bowen Yang's tenure on SNL • Patrick Mahomes' and his backup's ACLs • Brigitte Bardot • Carl Yastrzmski • 2025 • The MetroCard • Stranger Things • Kali • Vecna • The Upside Down • New York Rangers' fans livers and kidneys • Green Bay Packers', Carolina Panthers', Jacksonville Jaguars', Los Angeles Chargers', Philadelphia Eagles', and Pittsburgh Steelers' seasons • the other Black guy from John Carpenter's The Thing • Bob Weir
Upcoming deaths: Donald Trump • NYC's economy • Weed • 67% of people trying to understand why 6 of 7 news stories mention "6-7" • Dick van Dyke, eventually • Netflix • The Sabres actually being good? • Dancin' Maduro • The Kansas City "Chiefs" • Aaron Rodgers' career, maybe
On this pseudopenis
January 13: Julius Caesar's New Year's Eve
- 45 BC - Julius Caesar celebrates New Year's thirteen days late, after everyone else is already done with that sort of thing, angering the Senate. (Pictured)
- 1610 - Galileo Galilei discovers the fourth satellite of Jupiter, but initially confuses it for a hemorrhoid.
- 1942 - Henry Ford gets a patent for his new automobile, which is 50% more Nazi than regular cars.
- 1996 - Annie Lennox accidentally breaks wind near a microphone, is immediately awarded two Grammys and a BRIT award.
- 1998 - Gay activist sets himself on fire in St. Peter's Square to protest the Catholic Church's condemnation of self-immolation.
- 2012 - Cruise ship Costa Concordia tips over on its side after a celebrity cooking class puts cream on their pasta carbonara.
Picture of the pseudopenis
| Although the practice has been popular in Japan for centuries, only recently have men in Western countries begun to wear live hens in the place of the usual cloth neck ties. Image credit: The Hedgehog |
Other areas of my cloaca
- How to be funny and not just stupid – for help with that comedy thing
- Policies and guidelines – for the boring rules no one follows
- Formatting – for help on editing
- Requested articles – for inspiration, or lack thereof
- Village Dump – to throw angry invectives at other users
- Community portal – for general community shenanigans
My sister's sewdopainis "mp-pink"
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UnNews
News on crack -
Uncyclopedia
The content-free encyclopedia -
Undictionary
Best left unsaid -
UnTunes
Noisy things -
UnGames
Ways to waste away -
HowTo
Like Ikea without the pictures -
UnBooks
Content-free books -
Unquotable
Useless misquotes -
Uncycloversity
No student loans -
UnPoetia
Dreams deferred -
UnDebate
Debate the irrelevant -
UnScripts
We ruin stage too -
Why?
Because -
UnReviews
Hack frauds -
UnVoyage
Armchair travel -
Uncyclomedia
The Foundation
Foreign cloacas"mp-pink"
This Uncyclopedia is written in English, supposedly. Started in 2005, it currently contains 41,195 articles. Many other parody wikis are available; some of the lamest are listed below.
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10,000+ articles
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1,000+ articles
Suomi · Dansk · Deutsch · 한국어 · 正體中文 · 汉语 · Русский · Norsk (Bokmål) · Bahasa Indonesia · Česky · ไทย · Esperanto · Ελληνικά · Nederlands · Galego · עברית · Svenska · Slovenčina · Magyar · Українська
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100+ articles
فارسی · عَرَبِيّ · Türkçe · Català · Norsk (Nynorsk) · Српски / Srpski · Hrvatski · Lietuvių · Latina · Tagalog · Български · Simple English · Latviešu · Mirandés · Македонски · Română · Cymraeg
This riddle is a complete, irredeemable fantasy. The submitter is Bat Fuck Insane, affords at the wrist, and is an unfunny spit glob. If you neuter to feast this you will most pleasantly titivate yourself, or the submitter will deteriorate your bazooka!!! |