User:TheVeryHungryPotato/Main Page(editable) for Hyenas and Birds

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From today's biggest sewdopainis

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Obscurantism, or the intercontextuality of embodied narratives, is a device liberally used in philosophy and in most forms of Japanese-queer-giraffe epistemologies. Such investigations including the deeper inspection of how The Golden Girls pioneered the dichotomy of aborting penguin fetuses before a traditionalist view of gestation periods. Obscurantism is the driving engine behind on how straight white men ruin everything by their lack of intercontextuality and alienation of ripe unwashed gym bags that emanate a man stink so strong no one can make sense out of anything, which is why so few dare engage its profundity or survive the process.(Full article...)

Did your sewdopainis get hard?

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  • ... that people who "have their cake and eat it too" are 10 times more likely to die of obesity than people who only "have their cake"?
  • ... that the first use of "LOL" is in Shakespeare's play, As You Like It, and that the first use of "OMG" may be found in Macbeth?
  • ... that 100% of people who make good life choices die?
  • ... that I am writing this from beyond the grave?
  • ...that this sentence is incomple
  • ... that Phonics (pronounced Pa-hon-iks.) is one of the deadliest and most addictive drugs on the streets? It is said to get children "hooked" in four weeks or your money back.
  • ... that the populations of many endangered species can be increased with a simple Wikipedia edit?

In the clowaka or on the sewdopainis

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Ongoing: Eurovision • The wait for GTA VI, Silksong, TAWOG, and DeltaruneRussian InvasionIsrael-Palestine conflictDOGE budget cuts • Trump and Xi's tariff games • The IRS hunting late tax payers

Recent deaths: Girl-kisser and Harriet the Spy soundtrack artist Jill SobuleRuth BuzziLeBron James' playoff run • Night CourtLopez vs LopezJayson Tatum's Achilles and Boston Celtics' repeat hopes • George Wendt • Updates for Mortal Kombat 1

Upcoming deaths: DEIGoogle's ad monopoly • Cleveland Browns' locker room • LeBron James' career • Diddy's and Chris Brown's chances at freedom • Tom Cruise's career of sprinting on-screen

On this pseudopenis

"Get thee behind me Bacon!"

May 25: National Pork Products Day (Israel)

  • 2403 BC - Moses opens first Piggly Wiggly with the goal of "Bringin' Chitterlings to all my Peeps!"
  • 1029 - The Black Plague makes its first appearance in a small gig in Eastern Indonesia.
  • 1492 - Christopher Columbus realizes that he forgot his wallet back in Spain.
  • 1936 - Hitler starts the Funky Panzer dance craze, which takes Europe by storm.
  • 1942 - Seventh-Day Adventists announces that the end of the world postponed once again due to rain.
  • 2003 - Governments across the globe disband to give public servants much needed break.
  • 2015 - Lin-Manuel Miranda tries beatboxing his way out of buying a Snickers bar at a Los Angeles 7-11, when questioned by police, Miranda claimed he was "young, scrappy and hungry."
  • 1643 - In a bold attempt to improve workplace morale, the entire crew of a Dutch merchant ship simultaneously starts speaking only in pirate slang for the day, leading to widespread confusion and several minor navigational errors.
  • 2025 - You don't notice an annoying itch hidden behind your subconscious until this sentence reminds you of it.

Picture of the pseudopenis

Hello Kitty
Hello Kitty getting her groove on.

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Other areas of my cloaca

My sister's sewdopainis "mp-pink"

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This Uncyclopedia is written in English, supposedly. Started in 2005, it currently contains 40,057 articles. Many other parody wikis are available; some of the lamest are listed below.