Today's thing that needs to suffer
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| Asperger Syndrome (pronounced ASS-burger SIN-drome) is a semi-voluntary behavioural disorder in the guise of a more serious and involuntary neurodevelopmental disability. Statistically it affects an undue number of radio talk show hosts and Hollywood actors, though it has yet to be determined whether the behavior guides ultimate vocation, or whether the condition results from prolonged exposure to ego-stroking. Some theorists believe that the entire Japanese people suffer from Asperger's Syndrome because of their tendency to stay emotionally detached in all situations except seppuku. (more...)
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Aspies should all know...
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- ... that Hitler killed himself out of fear of Soviet capture and torture, not because he saw the gas bill?
- ... that every time you shoot yourself in the head, someone somewhere in the world dies?
- ... that to the untrained ear, John Aglethorpe's Ode to the Monotony of Life may simply sound like one continuous, monotonous tone, but the song is actually composed mostly of alterations between the A sharp and B flat notes tied together?
- ... that the moon is not made of cheese, but magnesium of milk powder, which explains why everyone that ever goes there feels sick when they come back?
- ... God doesn't appreciate those who smoke?
- ... that still lifes are the most interesting paintings?
- ... that hitting your kids may be beneficial to their health, or at the very least amusing to you?
 - ... God doesn't appreciate those who smoke?
- ... that if you die in Canada, you die in real life?
- ... that Barns and Nobles is the most successful medieval farming roleplaying game, played by millions of teenage nerds worldwide?
- ... that Alaska's principle exports include snow, ice, frozen water, and permafrost?
- ... that in Baltimore, Maryland, it is a violation of statute to dress up as a clown and to make fun balloon animals to give to children and molest them with?
- ... that I like cats, but could never eat a whole one?
- ... that people who "have their cake and eat it too" are 10 times more likely to die of obesity than people who only "have their cake"?
 - ... that Hitler killed himself out of fear of Soviet capture and torture, not because he saw the gas bill?
- ... that every time you shoot yourself in the head, someone somewhere in the world dies?
- ... that to the untrained ear, John Aglethorpe's Ode to the Monotony of Life may simply sound like one continuous, monotonous tone, but the song is actually composed mostly of alterations between the A sharp and B flat notes tied together?
- ... that the moon is not made of cheese, but magnesium of milk powder, which explains why everyone that ever goes there feels sick when they come back?
- ... God doesn't appreciate those who smoke?
- ... that still lifes are the most interesting paintings?
- ... that hitting your kids may be beneficial to their health, or at the very least amusing to you?
- ... God doesn't appreciate those who smoke?
- ... that if you die in Canada, you die in real life?
- ... that Barns and Nobles is the most successful medieval farming roleplaying game, played by millions of teenage nerds worldwide?
- ... that Alaska's principle exports include snow, ice, frozen water, and permafrost?
- ... that in Baltimore, Maryland, it is a violation of statute to dress up as a clown and to make fun balloon animals to give to children and molest them with?
- ... that I like cats, but could never eat a whole one?
- ... that people who "have their cake and eat it too" are 10 times more likely to die of obesity than people who only "have their cake"?
- ... that Hitler killed himself out of fear of Soviet capture and torture, not because he saw the gas bill?
- ... that every time you shoot yourself in the head, someone somewhere in the world dies?
- ... that to the untrained ear, John Aglethorpe's Ode to the Monotony of Life may simply sound like one continuous, monotonous tone, but the song is actually composed mostly of alterations between the A sharp and B flat notes tied together?
- ... that the moon is not made of cheese, but magnesium of milk powder, which explains why everyone that ever goes there feels sick when they come back?
- ... God doesn't appreciate those who smoke?
- ... that still lifes are the most interesting paintings?
- ... that hitting your kids may be beneficial to their health, or at the very least amusing to you?
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