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40,979 different problems to whine about
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Today's thing that needs to suffer
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| Asperger Syndrome (pronounced ASS-burger SIN-drome) is a semi-voluntary behavioural disorder in the guise of a more serious and involuntary neurodevelopmental disability. Statistically it affects an undue number of radio talk show hosts and Hollywood actors, though it has yet to be determined whether the behavior guides ultimate vocation, or whether the condition results from prolonged exposure to ego-stroking. Some theorists believe that the entire Japanese people suffer from Asperger's Syndrome because of their tendency to stay emotionally detached in all situations except seppuku. (more...)
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Aspies should all know...
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- ... that a bomb shelter is the safest place to hide explosives?
- ... that there is a pipe bomb placed in your mailbox?
- ... that abstinence is only 99.999% effective?
- ... that if you breed a Bulldog and a Shih Tzu; you will get a Bullshit?
- ... that being safe with guns is- *BANG*
- ... that cow tipping is a term that describes the custom of giving bovines an additional sum of money in exchange for their milk, meat, or other services?
- ... that dihydrogen monoxide is a substance found in car exhaust, pesticides, acid rain, and your energy drink?
- ... that the classic fairy tale Hansel and Gretel was blamed for hundreds of accidental deaths involving elderly women being pushed into ovens by children? (Pictured)
- ... that while laughter is the best medicine, many cancer patients prefer chemotherapy?
- ... that my girlfriend has herpes? Neither did I.
- ... that the packets of silica gel that say "DO NOT EAT" are actually delicious?
- ... that Ann Coulter is a highly successful parody of right-wing political rhetoric?
- ... that in the Mesozoic Era, toasters ruled the earth?
- ... that telling someone you masturbated to their Facebook picture is frowned upon in society?
- ... that under Communism, everyone gets a C?
 - ... that a bomb shelter is the safest place to hide explosives?
- ... that there is a pipe bomb placed in your mailbox?
- ... that abstinence is only 99.999% effective?
- ... that if you breed a Bulldog and a Shih Tzu; you will get a Bullshit?
- ... that being safe with guns is- *BANG*
- ... that cow tipping is a term that describes the custom of giving bovines an additional sum of money in exchange for their milk, meat, or other services?
- ... that dihydrogen monoxide is a substance found in car exhaust, pesticides, acid rain, and your energy drink?
- ... that the classic fairy tale Hansel and Gretel was blamed for hundreds of accidental deaths involving elderly women being pushed into ovens by children? (Pictured)
- ... that while laughter is the best medicine, many cancer patients prefer chemotherapy?
- ... that my girlfriend has herpes? Neither did I.
- ... that the packets of silica gel that say "DO NOT EAT" are actually delicious?
- ... that Ann Coulter is a highly successful parody of right-wing political rhetoric?
- ... that in the Mesozoic Era, toasters ruled the earth?
- ... that telling someone you masturbated to their Facebook picture is frowned upon in society?
- ... that under Communism, everyone gets a C?
- ... that a bomb shelter is the safest place to hide explosives?
- ... that there is a pipe bomb placed in your mailbox?
- ... that abstinence is only 99.999% effective?
- ... that if you breed a Bulldog and a Shih Tzu; you will get a Bullshit?
- ... that being safe with guns is- *BANG*
- ... that cow tipping is a term that describes the custom of giving bovines an additional sum of money in exchange for their milk, meat, or other services?
- ... that dihydrogen monoxide is a substance found in car exhaust, pesticides, acid rain, and your energy drink?
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