Main Page
From today's featured article
Many eons ago, homosexuals were unilaterally banished from mathematics faculties all over the Christian world as their sensitivity, hygiene and fabulous fashion sense showed up the serious failings in these areas by heterosexual mathematicians. This left gay scientists pondering how to find and hook up with other gay mathematicians who shared their passion for opera, rodeos and solving quadrilaterals in tight fitting shorts.
The urge to square root a whole bunch of logical chuckle buddies has been the driving force behind the majority of all scientific advances since the renaissance:
- Galileo Galilei's invention of the telescope
- Leonardo Da Vinci's invention of the bouncy castle
- The invention of male figure-skating auditions
Yet these all led to embarrassing situations that served no purpose other than providing the plots of Shakespeare's most famous farces ("All's Well That Bends Well", "Much Ado About Muffin", "Romeo & Julio", "Twelfth Knight" and "What Can We Do With A Problem Like Aksapada Gautama?". (Full article...)
Did you know...
- ... that there's only one word in the vocabulary of a customer service representative? (Pictured)
- ... that 100% of people who make good life choices die?
- ... that a rose by any other name would be called something else?
- ... that Barns and Nobles is the most successful medieval farming roleplaying game, played by millions of teenage nerds worldwide?
- ... that paper beats rock, but guns beat everything?
- ... that originally, Hell was an acronym for "Happiness, Euphoria, and Lively Laughter?"
- ... that Uncyclopedia mods are so lazy, they ask their users to think of DYK submissions?
- ... that the amazing sensation of excruciatingly warm liquid on the genitals is just one of many reasons to pour boiling hot water down your trousers?
In the news
- Labour approval hits record low during Starmer premiership, PM resorts to "getting down with the youth" (Pictured)
- The New York Yankees now fucking suck
- Russian ship shines annoying red laser pointer at British planes
- Ron DeSantis passes Florida bill allowing seniors to hunt zoomers for their skin and organs
- Russian economy on life support after barely growing in 3rd quarter
- The UK to ban the resale of tickets
- Bill passed in Pennsylvania to legalise flying cars because why the fuck not?
- Trump kills the penny after realizing spending four cents on a one cent coin isn't the best idea
- Russian AI powered humanoid robot faceplants on stage in front of crowd
- Syrian National Museum gets robbed of six to seven Roman statues
- Cloudy windy Hurricane Melissa hits da Jamaica, mon! BOMBOCLAAT!
Ongoing: The wait for GTA VI, Stranger Things 5 and Spaceballs 2 • Russia-Ukraine "peace talks" • ICE raids • Trump and Elon's couples therapy • Jerry Jones screwing the Dallas Cowboys • The Andrew Formerly Known as Prince • Rich New Yorkers fleeing Mamdanistan • Larry Sanger's war on Wikipedia • the New England Patriots suddenly being good again
Recent deaths: YouTube player's old design • Nick Mangold • Jamaica • Donna Godchaux • Diane Ladd • Dick Cheney • U.S. Government shutdown (finally!) • Tatsuya Nakadai • Sally Kirkland • The penny • Udo Kier • Jimmy Cliff
Upcoming deaths: Eurovision Song Contest • DEI • Iran's nuclear program • Diddy's bank account • MSNBC • Donald Trump • NYC's economy • Chiefs Kingdom's livers and kidneys after realizing they might actually miss the playoffs • Weed
On this day
November 29: Magic Appreciation Day (Hogwarts)
- 1983 - In a publicity stunt gone bad, Christian Pop singer Carman decapitates R&B star Marvin Gaye.
- 1983 - Band Aid release the little known Do The Welsh Know It's Christmas?.
- 1984 - Chocolate rations are increased from thirty to twenty grams.
- 1991 - David Copperfield stuns world by vanishing the Statue of Liberty, reappears three hours later in New Jersey.
- 1993 - The NYPD start investigation against Copperfield after the mysterious disappearance of Queens.
- 2003 - Donald Rumsfeld attempts to find WMDs with divining rod, finds three cursed talismans and a forest dryad instead.
Picture of the day
 |
Robert Frost has conveyed in a very detailed image about The Road Not Taken. Image credit: Gneomi |
Other areas of Uncyclopedia
- How to be funny and not just stupid – for help with that comedy thing
- Policies and guidelines – for the boring rules no one follows
- Formatting – for help on editing
- Requested articles – for inspiration, or lack thereof
- Village Dump – to throw angry invectives at other users
- Community portal – for general community shenanigans
Sister projects
-
UnNews
News on crack -
Uncyclopedia
The content-free encyclopedia -
Undictionary
Best left unsaid -
UnTunes
Noisy things -
UnGames
Ways to waste away -
HowTo
Like Ikea without the pictures -
UnBooks
Content-free books -
Unquotable
Useless misquotes -
Uncycloversity
No student loans -
UnPoetia
Dreams deferred -
UnDebate
Debate the irrelevant -
UnScripts
We ruin stage too -
Why?
Because -
UnReviews
Hack frauds -
UnVoyage
Armchair travel -
Uncyclomedia
The Foundation
Uncyclopedia languages
This Uncyclopedia is written in English, supposedly. Started in 2005, it currently contains 41,023 articles. Many other parody wikis are available; some of the lamest are listed below.
-
10,000+ articles
-
1,000+ articles
Suomi · Dansk · Deutsch · 한국어 · 正體中文 · 汉语 · Русский · Norsk (Bokmål) · Bahasa Indonesia · Česky · ไทย · Esperanto · Ελληνικά · Nederlands · Galego · עברית · Svenska · Slovenčina · Magyar · Українська
-
100+ articles
فارسی · عَرَبِيّ · Türkçe · Català · Norsk (Nynorsk) · Српски / Srpski · Hrvatski · Lietuvių · Latina · Tagalog · Български · Simple English · Latviešu · Mirandés · Македонски · Română · Cymraeg