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From today's featured article

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Having achieved significant commercial and literary success with his compendium of fables, published in 580 BCE, Aesop was able to pay his way out of slavery and into the infinitely more profitable business of self-promotion and after dinner speaking. History has not recorded the exact details of these missing years of Aesop's life, which was why we here at Anythingforadolla books were thrilled to discover this untouched manuscript believed to have been penned by Aesop himself in around 571 BCE. The publishers understand that having found initial success with fables, Aesop found himself struggling to make ends meet so he used the remainder of his personal wealth to purchase a stall near Thermopylae selling stylish tables to appoint the typical Ancient Greek dwelling.

This manuscript appears to chronicle Aesop's efforts to replicate the success he had had in literature into a fast paced business world. (Full article...)

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In the news

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Trump pictured holding up his project in front of his friends. They're all delighted.

Ongoing: The wait for GTA VI, Silksong, Stranger Things 5, and Spaceballs 2 • Russian InvasionGaza WarTrump and Elon's feud.. make up.. no one knows anymore • Israel/Hamas and Russia/Ukraine "peace talks" • Rock drummer exodus (not to be confused with Tom Hunting or Zbigniew Fyk) • Chicago Bears winning the preseason • K-pop: the movie doing surprisingly well

Recent deaths: Bill Cosby's TV sonOzzy OsbourneChuck MangioneHulk HoganResident AlienDown syndromeTom LehrerThe systemFUBARCartoon Network/Adult Swim/Toonami on Comcast's basic cable package • Sydney Sweeney's new movie • Terence Stamp

Upcoming deaths: DEIR. Kelly • Iran's nuclear program • Oil prices • Diddy's bank account after incoming lawsuits • The asshats who spoiled Squid GameMAGAJoe Biden's credibility • The flowers you bring Alan BergmanBryan Kohberger, at the hands of his fellow inmates • Chicago Bears' regular season • MSNBCROBLOX

On this day

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August 24: Punch a Donkey for Jesus Day

  • 1132 - A Catharist sect in southern France incorporates Donkey Punching into their mass following a mistranslation of Matthew 21:7.
  • 1456 - The printing of the Gutenberg Bible is completed by Steve Gutenberg.
  • 1463 - Portuguese language discovered to be mispronounced Spanish.
  • 1561 - Prince Willem of Orange marries Duchess Anna of Sherbert.
  • 1853 - Potato chips invented. This is hailed as a triumph, as it will finally permit people to get rid of the vast mountains of dip that clog the streets of Europe.
  • 1995 - Mike Tyson converts to Christianity, kills several donkeys with uppercuts.
  • 2011 - Barack Obama pardons a donkey for Good Friday, only to shove him into a glue extractor on Easter.

Picture of the day

Satan's Job
Satan hates his job, too. You're not like Satan. Are you?

Image credit: RadicalX
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