From today's featured article
Adolf excels in creative writing. He has invented his own little world in which he has cast himself as the blond Adonis and peopled it with willing slaves and adoring fans. His imagination seems to have no bounds. In essay after essay, he has plotted a fictional future for himself where he rises to the very top of society through the sheer power of his own personality. This would seem almost laughable, were the imagery within it not so powerful or so frighteningly violent.
Adolf has great potential as a writer and could, I think, make a living from his talents in this field. If I were to make one suggestion, however, it is that he should abandon his ambition to write romantic novels for ladies. Instead, I believe he should consider writing Western novels, where it will be more acceptable for Aryan heroes to mercilessly slaughter lesser races. (Full article...)
Did you know...
- ... that tickle fights are a common occurrence in soccer? (Pictured)
- ... that Iran is all set to invade itself?
- ... that Abraham Lincoln was an accomplished skateboarder?
- ... that St. Peter's Basilica is a large reptilian creature with breath of fire and a gaze that can turn people into stone?
- ... that hitting your kids may be beneficial to their health, or at the very least amusing to you?
- ... that Witch-Hunting For Fun and Profit has mostly turned into Witch-Hunting For Fun in this modern era of cheaply produced Chinese assembly line witches?
- ... that back in my day, we didn't have no fancy Did you know sections on our wikis? We had to get all of our factoids from the library, like decent folk! And after we walked there barefoot across three counties 'cause bicycles hadn't been invented yet, we had to teach ourselves how to read the books - none of that fancy free-contents education you kids're all on about...
- ... that if you put an ear up to a person's leg you can hear them say, "What the fuck are you doing?"
In the news
- A*Teens reunite 40 years later
- UnNews' exclusive interview with God (Pictured)
- R.E.M. members reunite, sign gigantic deal
- Patrick eats SpongeBob
- O.J. Simpson to make triumphant return to acting
- Citizen Kane sucks
- John Kerry comes out as a horse
- Supermarket thief: "Donkey Kong told me to"
- Mike Pence turns into a pickle
- It is all happening
- Lady Gaga's dogs stolen, returned
- Björk responds to Anti-Asian violence
- Stan Marsh presents: 2022 FIFA World Cup sucks ass
- Biden responds to North Korea's "Stink" complaints
- BMI songwriters (but not ASCAP) to receive vaccine
- Governor Cuomo from New York is screwed
- Grodin Museum reopens to public
- Old movies are suddenly offensive
- Northeast getting another blizzard
- Just another dead doper and a dirtbag dies
- Marilyn Manson removed from New Radicals hit
- Biden will recognize Hillary as 45th President
On this day
- 1882 - Canada Creates Take a Sojourn to Canada Day to improve Canada, instances of rape by Yaks increase 140%
- 1907 - Robert Perry becomes the first man to take a sojourn to the North Pole, is raped by a reindeer.
- 1912 - Man takes a sojourn on the titanic, nearly downs
- 1935 - A wizard did it during a sojourn in Canada, it is said to be fucking magical or something!!
- 1948 - A white woman is nearly raped by a negro during her sojourn to the post office, customary lynching soon follows
- 1959 - The Soviet Union institutes Take a Sojurn to the Soviet Union day, instances of Yak rape increase 150%
- 1972 - Somebody nearly maed a yuky doody during their Sojourn to Canada
- 1995 - Stephen Hawking runs over a cat during a sojourn in Oxford
- 2006 - A young boy is nearly raped by a gay English teacher while taking a sojourn in Canada
- 2008 - Barack Obama stole my bike
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Other areas of Uncyclopedia
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- Policies and guidelines — for the boring rules no one follows
- Formatting – for help on editing
- Requested articles – for inspiration, or lack thereof
- Village Dump – to throw angry invectives at other users
- Community portal – for general community shenanigans
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