From today's featured article
Hi there. Take a seat. Have a biscuit. A digestive, maybe? Chocolate Hob nob? The choice is entirely yours. Don't let me pressure you. Don't even have a biscuit if you don't want one. It matters not one jot to me, so long as you are comfortable and happy. Tell you what, forget the biscuit. Pretend it never happened. I'm truly sorry I even brought it up. If I could make the world biscuit-free, just for you, I would - but heck, I'm just a cop on a salary. My influence on the biscuit industry is pretty limited.
So, today, we are going to discuss the Good cop/Bad cop interrogation technique. Would you like that? Great! Let's get started. For this technique, you need two cops, a small room and a suspect - that's you! I'm good cop and I want to be your friend. Would you like to be my friend? Let's be friends. Now that we are two friends in one room, we can learn about interrogation techniques.
Ok, before we go any further, I want to introduce you to my partner, Bad cop. Now, I think it is only fair to warn you that while Bad cop is a dedicated, fair and hardworking guy, he can sometimes be a tiny weenie little bit, well, how can I put this... psychotic? (Full article...)
Did you know...
- ... that the Black Knight always triumphs? (Pictured)
- ... that bestiality just got 15 percent more legal?
- ... that although the effects of alternative medicine are difficult to separate from a placebo, dumb hippies are easy to separate from their money?
- ... that genocide is a perfectly healthy response to any personal problems you may have?
- ... that every time you blink, you get transported to another alternative Universe?
- ... that telling someone you masturbated to their Facebook picture is frowned upon in society?
- ... that still lifes are the most interesting paintings?
- ... that I like cats, but could never eat a whole one?
In the news
- Pink Floyd killed by coronavirus
- Kalifornische Beamte erklären das Ego von Elon Musk für wesentlich
- Trump declares COVID-19 a terrorist organization (Pictured)
- Your cat's gonna kill you
- Christof from The Truman Show dies aged 74
- Libertarian celebrities sing Imagine No Taxes
- Hasbro sued by ViacomCBS, WarnerMedia
- Heaven under coronavirus quarantine
- Bernie endorses Biden, who is seen clawing at air and drooling after instinctively sensing pussy
- Queen's Coronavirus address in full
- Trump smells the Corona, wants to starve a bunch of beasts
- The Cure gets weird with COVID-19
On this day
- 1958 - The hit song by The Rivingtons, "The Turd is the Word" makes the top 40.
- 1971 - First invasion of the Kurds.
- 1977 - Melvin Rogers becomes first person to be arrested for DUI. How'd they know? His speech was slurred.
- 1980 - First all nude production of Richard the Third.
- 1990 - Name calling and liberal locker stuffing thwarts the first revenge of the Nerds.
- 1998 - The Rhymes With Turd day is officially abolished, putting an end to a day so absurd.
- 1999 - Damien Hirst tries making an internal rhyme with Hirst and Turd and is yelled at for being a ponce.
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