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From today's featured article
The Westboro Baptist Church is the lone bastion of reason and morality in a world gone mad. Logically, it is located in Topeka, Kansas, home to intelligent design and the rock supergroup of the same name. The Church, which is rumored to have in excess of twelve members and growing by no less than none every year, is headed by misunderstood idiot-savant and knight-errant of goodness Fred Phelps, attorney-at-law.
Under Phelps' utterly creative, sometimes incendiary, and always visionary leadership, the Westboro Baptist Church has successfully drawn the ire of pretty much everyone in the world. It has achieved this well-thought-out and beneficial aim by rejoicing for natural disasters, the spread of disease, and other afflictions on humankind that are generally regarded by the rest of the world as a time for compassion and mourning. Ironically, due to its obsession with celebrating misery, the Church has itself in recent years invited what it considers unwelcome attention to its activities, including vicious beatings of its members, intermittent showerings of its compound with pig feces, and yet more vicious beatings of its members. (Full article...)
Did you know...
- ... that the WWF is the only "sports entertainment" organization endorsed by PETA and Greenpeace? (Pictured)
- ... that doody played a very important role in the development of quantum physics?
- ... that it takes a great amount of sexual commitment to get a computer turned on, but once your computer is properly aroused, it can offer you some of the greatest sexual thrills you may ever experience?
- ... that if you die in Canada, you die in real life?
- ... that genocide is a perfectly healthy response to any personal problems you may have?
- ... that 100% of people who make good life choices die?
- ... that your opinion does count, but the admins think otherwise?
- ... Nautical knots are not knots that can be knotted into knots (most likely not)?
In the news
- Israel's democracy is saved by new superheroine (Pictured)
- Proposed Florida bill aims to solve the pronoun problem once and for all
- California lays plans to automatically issue auto registrations for all voters
- U.S. Air Force party-poops China's Lunar New Year "celebration"
- Showtime announces Dexter: Bad Blood
- Late delivery: Demi Lovato and a hurricane team up to fix a supercomputer by turning it off and then back on
- Viggo Mortensen joins Next James Bond
- The movie Casablanca is 80 years old. Here's Looking At You, Kid!
- President pardons Türkiye
- Pennsylvania: Should I vote for Mike Doyle or Mike Doyle?
- People in Los Angeles have another thing to make their lives more miserable
Ongoing: Russian Invasion · Eurovision · Alected
Recent deaths: Inside Job · Gina Lollobrigida · Wikipedia · David Crosby · George P. Wilbur · DC Extended Universe
Upcoming deaths: Twitter · Warner Bros. · Marvel Cinematic Universe
On this day
March 24: International Do-It-Yourself Day
- 1857 - Oscar Wilde pens his story The Soul of Man under Socialism while under something else.
- 1943 - Jackson Pollock unveils his long-awaited third exhibition, featuring the classic Angsty Orange Tiger.
- 1964 - The ping pong incident occurs at my high school, and will torment me for over forty years until my son avenges me.
- 1991 - The first child is admitted to the hospital for Phonics addiction in the beginning of a nation-wide pandemic, resulting in thousands of kids becoming 'hooked'.
- 1994 - Kitty porn makes its first appearance on the primitive internet.
- 2007 - The first human trials of Neuroipods suffer drawbacks when a vast majority of test subjects contract iEllepsy.
- 2010 - Sarah Palin kicks off the first annual Alaskan Sasquatch Appreciation Day.
Picture of the day
You know what they say, "You can't shit a shitter". But M.C. Escher will be damned if he didn't try! Image credit: KneeChee27 |
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