User:Jocke Pirat/Federal Reserve

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Uncyclopedia Federal Reserve
Premier Uncyclopedia Loans, Bank Accounts, and Banking Standards
Uncyclopedia Federal Reserve.png

Tophatsig.png Operated by The Bankers' Commission Tophatsig.png

Jocke Pirat | Gert5 | High Gen. Grue

LIVE! CURRENCY EXCHANGE RATE BOARD

All currencies have a live, calculated, universal exchange rate which is based on users and the money inside the system.

Currency Bank Total Reserve Fractional Reserve UER
YNX Bank of Yoinxx 17500 157500 Expression error: Unrecognized punctuation character "_".
VAL National Bank of Oceania 17100 153900 Expression error: Unrecognized punctuation character "_".
CRED Grue Army Treasury

Squadrons[edit]

Choose a squadron, or two, or all.

Twin Suns Squadron(18th Twin Suns)[edit]

Job: Reverting Vandalism, Reporting Vandals, and Placing Crap on QVFD, VFD, and ICU

Blue Squadron(92nd Deputies)[edit]

Job: Breaking up destructive flame wars, unless on BHOP

Generic Squadron(107th Ravens)[edit]

Job: Dying in Y-wings Helping users with everyday problems

Magnum Squadron(70th Magnums)[edit]

Job: Managing the Army

Reserve Squadron(53rd Derelicts)[edit]

Job: Being ready to be called up to one of these squadrons

Allies[edit]

Job: Assisting the Grue Army during vandal outbreaks and stuff, but not joining

Good Cop, Bad Cop[edit]

Soldier: First rank when you join
Heavy Soldier: 5 plusses
Corporal: 20 plusses
Sergeant: 50 plusses
Lieutenant: 90 plusses
Major: 160 plusses
Admiral: 250 plusses
General: 350 plusses
High General: Leader of the Army
  • Leoispotter:40
  • Magic man:567
  • Happytimes:0
  • Electrified mocha chinchilla:1
  • Fudgemobile:369
  • THEDUDEMAN:100
  • Iwillkillyou333:0
  • Socky:0
  • ComradeSlice:0
  • Lollipop:0
  • Cat The Colorful:0
  • Mimo&maxus:1
  • Meganew:2315
  • Flaminfinger13:23
  • Aleister in Chains:1
  • JebusCryst:0
  • Poiz:80
  • Dancing dude:0
  • Vox:0
  • TheSlyFox:96
  • Kevindong:150

Tips for New Users needing help[edit]

Even as little blocks, we will protect you.
  • If you want to keep your article from being ICU'd, QVFD'd, or VFD'd place {{contruction}} on your article. Or you can make a user sub-page like User:<insert name here>/Article WIP.
  • If you need help, you can go to The Help forum, or this place. Please follow, and read the link in BIG LETTERS.

Other ways to get help include:

Asking a Grue Army member (We won't eat you, don't worry.)
Bribe Ask an sysop. They might know.
Try IRC, or the dump, a few users are willing to help you there.
  • If you would like other's opinion on your articles, send a request in Pee Review.
  • A good place to ask for help on spelling and grammar is Ceridwyn's proofreading service.
  • Before editing, read HTBFANJS, BGBU, and many others. The more, the better your article's chances will be.
  • If you want to vandalize, the Grue Army will come upon you, DESTROY your edits, and report you to Ban Patrol for banning. If you would like to report a vandal, go here.
  • If you would like to be educated by an experienced user, ask about being adopted. Go to Adopt-A-Noob although I like to think of n00bs as "New users." Go to Uncyclopedia:AAN/Adopters to see a list of people wanting to adopt.
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FRN Federal Reserve Expression error: Unrecognized punctuation character "_". Expression error: Unrecognized punctuation character "_". 1


Request a Loan

Do you need a loan to purchase something? Simply drop the bankers a line on the talk page. We'll get to you as soon as possible.

The Fed Says Interest Rates Are At:

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An all time low, so this is the best time to loan money



Request a Bank Account

Do you need a bank account that's flexible enough to be changed into any Uncyclopedia currency, and gain interest? Sign up for a bank account at the Federal Reserve, and experience the power of being inside the system!

Account type Description Interest rate per month Courtesy Deposit
Savings Accounts They gain slow, but everyone can get them. Expression error: Unrecognized punctuation character "_".% 100 FRN
Advanced Savings For editors with a credit rating of 100 or better Expression error: Unrecognized punctuation character "_".% 100 FRN
CD For editors with a credit rating of 300 or better Expression error: Unrecognized punctuation character "_".% 500 FRN
Mutual Fund For editors with a credit rating of 500 or better Expression error: Unrecognized punctuation character "_".% 1000 FRN

Don't know your credit rating? Go to the banking standards box to find your credit rating!


Uncyclopedia Federal Reserve Notes

Federal Reserve note designs have not been made. Please be patient.


Banking Standards

Credit Rating

To determine your credit rating, simply convert all your funds into FRN, and divide it into the lending rate. Subtract 50 points for every 100 FRN you have on loan. This will be your credit rating.

Fractional Reserve Ratio

This determines how much we can loan out before going bust. It is currently at 9 debted notes to 1 real note, but can increase as demand requires.

International Bankers Pen

We sockpuppet this page and its finances. All owners of all Uncyclopedia banks can join the bankers pen.