Portal:Society

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The Society Portal
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Society is an abstract concept that envisions people and culture as a unified entity, thinking and acting in harmony. It represents a collective human aspiration, yet it is constantly mistaken as something already achieved. This illusion diminishes its true value and purpose, leading to its gradual decline.

Society only finds skinny people attractive, but is fat itself. Society doesn't like to stereotype people, except those damn Mexicans with their beans and rice. Society thinks foreigners should learn English before coming to America, but needs to find an English-speaker when it goes on vacation abroad. Society finds prison rape hilarious. Society believes America to be the greatest country on the motherfucking planet! Society preaches that gays should have equal rights... Just not in front of Society. Society knows that anyone who doesn't stand up during the Star-Spangled Banner is obviously a Communist. Society has no gender, yet seems to favor straight white men. But trust us, Society's not biased or hypocritical at all. (See more...)
Societal Selections
Example.png

PERSONAL ATTN: Staci Loman
1432 Kitchenside Dr.
Probably like, Ohio

Dear Ms. Loman,

I know this information is coming at an inopportune time in your life; having a deaf sister is never an easy burden to bear. And I know that the recent C+ in Geometry has severely affected your relationship with your parents for the time being, leading to a terribly unfortunate loss of car-borrowing privileges. I also heard about your cat Chuckles. Again, I’m terribly sorry. However, I believe the time has come for us to see other people. Other people, as in absolutely not each other.

Written by The Thinker
Selected Image
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Phrenology was a pseudoscientific belief that people's personality and worth could be determined by the shape of their head. Now, we look at your credit score instead.
Image by Huffers
Did You Know?
Featured Folk
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White people (also delicately called Crackas, Caucasians, and Honkies) are pasty, melanin-deficient humans who have been sprinkled throughout the planet to exploit its resources and boss around everyone of more humble colors. White people are smart (in ways that don't really matter) and complain about stupid stuff, even though they have it better than every other race.

Whites discriminate against everyone else. Non-whites, by comparison, don't discriminate against whites, because they don't have majority power, so it isn't discrimination even if they do. And whites have stupid names to insult members of other races. No one else does that. These albinescent people are the only race that believes in space aliens. (George Clinton and Louis Farrakhan don't count, because they are space aliens.) In fact, whites love to hear themselves talk so much that they assemble entire collections of their own words (known as books).

Society in the News
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DENVER, Colorado – Denver-area sources say that area man Wes Dober has failed to return an ice scraper to his roommate, local journalist Jim Hoffman.

Hoffman loaned the ice scraper to Dober last weekend when Dober said he wanted to run to the store to pick up some "stuff". Hoffman had intended to devote the entire day to beating "Heavenly Sword" on the Playstation 3, so he agreed to the request.

However, Hoffman has yet to have that ice scraper returned to him.

"I'm pretty irritated," Hoffman said in an interview with his tape recorder. "I had to sit in the car for 20 minutes this morning while it defrosted. Then I had to go out and try to clean off the windshield with a credit card."

Written by Hyperbole
Quote of the Day
Further Reading
Societal divisions
Ethnicity

Ethnicity • African Americans • American (species) • Asian people • British people • Canadians • Carnies • Flying Gypsies • Foreign accent syndrome • HowTo:Be German • HowTo:Be Japanese • Jew • Niggers • Pikeys - Our Friends • Strategic Stereotypical Australian Reserve • The Last of the Mohicans • White people

Economic classes

Aristocrats (class) • British class system • Homeless nerds • NEET • The Poor

By age and generation

Baby boomers • Infant • HowTo:Be an adult • Generation Alpha • Generation Beta • Youth • Old people • Teenager

Subcultures

Bronies • Emo • Furries • Gamers • Goths • Hippie • Hipster • Metalheads

Activities
Cloud Hunting • Extreme Programming • HowTo:Kill Yourself With A Brick • HowTo:Refer to Yourself in the Third Person • HowTo:Walk • It's Your Turn To Take Out The Trash
Philosophy
Concepts

Ad hominem • Bad Arguments • Beauty • Brain Age • Circular Logic • Enlightenment • Fuck All • Karma • Layman • Psychology • Russian double reversal • Subtlety • There Isn't Any

Ideologies

Anti-intellectualism • Being and Nothingness • God, kittens, masturbation, killing, and you • HowTo:Control Your Emotions • I'm not a racist, but... • In what way is Snickers satisfying? • You don't exist • You have two cows

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