Portal:Portals
A portal is an introductory page for a given topic. It points out good articles on a topic, allowing non-featured material to be highlighted in some form. Portals also help editors find related projects and things they can do to help improve Uncyclopedia.
Portals are the best way to start exploring Uncyclopedia. Or, they would be, if it wasn't for the fact that most people don't really care about them, so they aren't really edited that much. But we can always pretend that they're active, for the sake of maintaining a minimum of credibility as an encyclopaedic wiki.
This page explains how portals work.
Uncyclopedia is a poor, meme-ridden "comedy" website that has cemented itself into online infamy. The site, which is thought to have originated in 1860 as an American imperialist tool for global domination, is now a multi-national effort and is viewed as the best of its kind by some.
Uncyclopedia specializes in tedious mockery of perceived competitors and petty in-fighting, with much of the content seen as mass-produced junk. Yet, there remains a peculiar fondness for some of the articles by fanatics. This is a view that has sparked a substantial shift from the site's satirical aspirations, causing it to instead redirect its resources into pathetic Russian reversals and endless references to Chuck Norris. This is compounded by the need for articles that appease a "softer consensus".
- Diddy gets off easy, possibly due to bribing jury
- Musk establishes "Porky Pig Party" to combat Trump's "Big Beautiful Bill" (Pictured)
- United Nations Secretary General gives up on world peace, World War Three begins
- Netanyahu and Khamenei get it on
- Trump joins in for threesome, blows load
- Khamenei fails to follow up after dirty talk, taps out
- Elon Musk breaks up with Trump
- Trump sends condolences to "Sly Stallone"
- Trump celebrates TACO Wednesday by reversing course on long-held campaign promise
- THE ROCKIES HAVE WON A SERIES!
Ongoing: The wait for GTA VI, Silksong, TAWOG, Stranger Things 5, and Spaceballs 2 • Russian Invasion • Gaza War • Trump and Elon's feud.. make up.. no one knows anymore • Animal-related live-action remakes kicking Snow White's ass • Jaws 50th anniversary • Colorado Rockies game replacing Jaws airing • Israel/Iran "peace talks" • Pittsburgh Steelers adding old players way past their prime
Recent deaths: Fear Street: Prom Queen • John Redcorn • Brian Grazer's career and livelihood, and anyone's respect for him • Sly Stallone Stone • Brian Wilson • Ariana Grande's Nonna • Canadian team's bid to win the Stanley Cup, again • PF4Eva's headphone cable • Jimmy Swaggart • Diddy's freedom for only 20 years
Upcoming deaths: DEI • Tom Cruise's career of sprinting on-screen • New York Knicks' future success • Pittsburgh Steelers' locker room • Greta Thunberg? • R. Kelly • Iran's nuclear program • Oil prices • Dumbasses with fireworks in their backyards • Diddy's bank account after incoming lawsuits
“Here you can read one of the finest quotes about the portal of the topic”
- … this is a portal?
- … the portal has a topic?
- … even if the portal doesn't have a topic, it should still have a pretty nice ass? Maybe it does, maybe it doesn't, that's a portal
{{#css:Uncyclopedia:Portals/styles.css}}{{PortalNav}} <div class="portal-container portal-platonic"> <!-- INTRO --> <div class="portal-row portal-panel"> <div class="portal-panel-header">{{Portal header|Platonic Portal}}</div> <div class="portal-panel-content">{{/Intro}}</div> </div> <!-- HIGHLIGHTS --> <div class="portal-row portal-highlights"> <!-- HIGHLIGHTS COLUMN 1 --> <div class="portal-highlights-column"> <div class="portal-panel portal-blurb"> <div class="portal-panel-header">{{Portal header|Featured Article|Selected Articles}}</div> <div class="portal-panel-content">{{/Selected Articles}}</div> </div> </div> <!-- HIGHLIGHTS COLUMN 2 --> <div class="portal-highlights-column"> <div class="portal-panel portal-blurb"> <div class="portal-panel-header">{{Portal header|Featured Image|Selected Pictures}}</div> <div class="portal-panel-content">{{/Selected Pictures}}</div> </div> </div> </div> <!-- BOTTOM ROWS --> <div class="portal-row portal-panel"> <div class="portal-panel-header">More Portals</div> <div class="portal-panel-content">{{Topics}}</div> </div> </div> [[Category:Uncyclopedia Portals]]
Here is the code for an example "blurb" subpage
<noinclude><gallery> File:Article1.jpg|[[Article1]] File:Article2.jpg|[[Article2]] </gallery></noinclude> <includeonly><choose> <option>{{Selected article |article = Article1 |image = Article1.jpg |author = |summary = }}</option> <option>{{Selected article |article = Article2 |image = Article2.jpg |author = |summary = }}</option> </choose></includeonly>
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Art
Peak pretentiousness -
Business
Money, money, money! -
Comedy
The science of funny -
Culinary
Food for the soul -
Film
Enter the Matrix -
Games
Recess time -
Gay
A gay ol' time -
Geography
Get lost -
History
Factually wrong -
Literature
Literally illiterate -
Internet
A series of tubes -
Music
Rock on! -
Politics
Politically incorrect -
People
The people's portal -
Religion
Speak of the Devil -
Science
Playing to be God -
Society
We live in one -
Technology
Breaking stuff easier -
Television
Turn your brain off -
Theatre
To be or not to be -
Video Games
Better than sex -
Zoology
Beware of furries -
Portals
Meta-Portal -
Community
The Community -
Main Page
The Uncyclopedia