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From today's featured article [Feature an article]

In mid-2005, Satan had started to publicly question and denounce Tyson's recognition as the "Baddest Man on the Planet." When Tyson learned of this via an interview, Tyson grinned at the camera. Soon after this interview, Tyson challenged Satan to a professional boxing match in order to see "who the baddetht man of the planet really ith." Satan accepted and arranged for the fight to happen in Hell.

For Tyson this fight was for all the marbles: lose, and his soul would be damned to Hell; win, and his soul would be taken into the Kingdom of Heaven.(Full article...)

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Did you know... [edit]

... that Cafeteria food (Pictured) is not generally edible?

... that within a few weeks of being held in captivity dolphins are able to train humans to stand at the side of a pool and throw them fish?
...that Elon Musk plots to monetarily obtain Madagascar for the industrialization of Tesla manufacturing plants, alongside having it renamed "Mada-electric-car"?
... that Euroipods is a website giving away free ipods in return for completing offers and reffering freinds to do the same?
... that there is a 9 out of 10 chance that New Jersey is actually a state?
... that if you put an ear up to a person's leg you can hear them say, "What the fuck are you doing?"
...No, you didn't! Stop lying!
... that while most Popes don't shit in the woods, sometimes bears are Catholic?

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In the news [edit]

"It's for the children's own good!"

Trump sends condolences to "Ozzie Nelson," "Paul Hogan," "Luigi Mangione"
Epstein list predictions
Starmer bans pornography nationwide (Pictured)
Ozzy Osbourne remembers Uncyclopedia
Obama to Democrats: "toughen up, you fucking pussies!"
Trump sends condolences to tough-guy actor "Mikey Madison"
Clint Eastwood announces plans to live forever
Trumpman introduces Trumpmobile
Diddy gets off easy, possibly due to bribing jury
Musk establishes "Porky Pig Party" to combat Trump's "Big Beautiful Bill"
United Nations Secretary General gives up on world peace, World War Three begins
Lawyer is unable to remember what the trial is about, defendant is convicted of burglary

Ongoing: The wait for GTA VI, Silksong, TAWOG, Stranger Things 5, and Spaceballs 2 • Russian Invasion • Gaza War • Trump and Elon's feud.. make up.. no one knows anymore • Superman and Super Dog's movie doing surprisingly well • Israel/Iran and Russia/Ukraine "peace talks" • Pittsburgh Steelers adding old players way past their prime • Rock drummer exodus (not to be confused with Tom Hunting or Zbigniew Fyk)

Recent deaths: Diddy's freedom for only 20 years • Michael Madsen • Diogo Jota • Texas flood victims • LA ICE raids • Connie Francis • Alan Bergman • Bill Cosby's TV son • Bryan Kohberger's freedom • Ozzy Osbourne • Chuck Mangione • Hulk Hogan • Resident Alien • Down syndrome • Tom Lehrer

Upcoming deaths: DEI • Pittsburgh Steelers' locker room • R. Kelly • Iran's nuclear program • Oil prices • Diddy's bank account after incoming lawsuits • The asshats who spoiled Squid Game • MAGA • Joe Biden's credibility • The flowers you bring Alan Bergman • Bryan Kohberger, at the hands of his fellow inmates

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On this day [edit]

August 1: Swiss Cheese Day (Belgium)

1844 - The FBI executes a sting operation to capture turnip kingpin Baldrick. (Pictured)
1910 - The first drive-by shooting happens on the streets of Los Angeles, the culprit is quickly apprehended by off-duty cop on a leisurely stroll.
1923 - Calvin Klein is elected mayor of Cologne, Germany. He runs things rather poorly.
1949 - Wichita man born with a penis on his spine receives the first massage with a happy ending, mostly by accident.
1957 - Rod Serling is ticketed in the middle ground between Light and Shadow, for driving intoxicated in... the Twilight Zone.
1979 - As a joke, Australia elects its first kangaroo prime minister, whose mishandling of the Australian legal system inspires the term "Kangaroo court".
1986 - Ronald Reagan attempts to nuke Russia after a wet dream involving Gorbachev.

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Picture of the day

It is evident that the car has come a long way since its original cardboard chassis design.

Image credit: Hindleyite
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Other areas of Uncyclopedia

How to be funny and not just stupid – for help with that comedy thing
Policies and guidelines – for the boring rules no one follows
Formatting – for help on editing
Requested articles – for inspiration, or lack thereof
Village Dump – to throw angry invectives at other users
Community portal – for general community shenanigans

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Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects as well as some foreign language Uncyclopedias and Illogicopedia.

UnNews
News on crack
Uncyclopedia
The content-free encyclopedia
Undictionary
Best left unsaid
UnTunes
Noisy things
UnGames
Ways to waste away
HowTo
Like Ikea without the pictures
UnBooks
Content-free books
Unquotable
Useless misquotes
Uncycloversity
No student loans
UnPoetia
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UnDebate
Debate the irrelevant
UnScripts
We ruin stage too
Why?
Because
UnReviews
Hack frauds
UnVoyage
Armchair travel
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The Foundation

Uncyclopedia languages

This Uncyclopedia is written in English, supposedly. Started in 2005, it currently contains 40,442 articles. Many other parody wikis are available; some of the lamest are listed below.

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