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{{:Portals/C|max=870px|s2=padding-top:1em; white-space:nowrap; text-align:left|1=<div style="font-size:1.6em; line-height:1.25em; white-space:wrap;padding:6px 5px 2px 5px">Welcome to [[Uncyclopedia]], </div><div style="font-size:94%">The [[content-free]] encyclopedia anyone{{SP}}can{{SP}}edit<br />[[Special:Statistics|{{NUMBEROFARTICLES}}]] articles in [[English language|English]]</div>
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<div style="font-size:1.6em">Welcome to [[Uncyclopedia]],</div><div style="font-size:94%">The [[content-free]] encyclopedia anyone can edit<br />[[Special:Statistics|{{NUMBEROFARTICLES}}]] articles in [[English language|English]]</div>
  
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<h2>From today's featured article&nbsp;<span style="font-weight:normal; font-size:80%; display:none;" class="plainlinks featurecode interface-show"><nowiki>[</nowiki>[https://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/Template:Featuredarticle/queue?action=edit&section=new&preload=Template:Featuredarticle/queue/include&editintro=Template:Nextfeatureslot Feature an article]<nowiki>]</nowiki></span></h2>
  
<h2>From today's featured article&nbsp;<span style="font-weight:normal; font-size:80%; display:none;" class="plainlinks featurecode interface-show"><nowiki>[</nowiki>[https://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/Template:Featuredarticle/queue?action=edit&section=new&preload=Template:Featuredarticle/queue/include&editintro=Template:Nextfeatureslot Feature an article]<nowiki>]</nowiki></span></h2>
 
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<h2>Did you know...&nbsp;<span style="font-weight:normal; font-size:80%; display:none;" class="plainlinks featurecode interface-show"><nowiki>[</nowiki>[https://en.uncyclopedia.co/w/index.php?title=Template:DidYouKnow&action=submit edit]<nowiki>]</nowiki></span></h2>
  
<h2>Did you know...&nbsp;<span style="font-weight:normal; font-size:80%; display:none;" class="plainlinks featurecode interface-show"><nowiki>[</nowiki>[https://en.uncyclopedia.co/w/index.php?title=Template:DidYouKnow&action=submit edit]<nowiki>]</nowiki></span></h2>
 
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<div style="text-align:right; clear:both">'''[[Did You Know|Archive]]''' {{·}} '''[[Uncyclopedia:DYK submissions|Suggest new entries]]'''</div>
  
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<h2>In the news&nbsp;<span style="font-weight:normal; font-size:80%; display:none;" class="plainlinks featurecode interface-show"><nowiki>[</nowiki>[https://en.uncyclopedia.co/w/index.php?title=Template:RecentUnNews&action=submit edit]<nowiki>]</nowiki></span></h2>
  
<h2>In the news&nbsp;<span style="font-weight:normal; font-size:80%; display:none;" class="plainlinks featurecode interface-show"><nowiki>[</nowiki>[https://en.uncyclopedia.co/w/index.php?title=Template:RecentUnNews&action=submit edit]<nowiki>]</nowiki></span></h2>
 
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<h2>On this day&nbsp;<span style="font-weight:normal; font-size:80%; display:none;" class="plainlinks featurecode interface-show"><nowiki>[</nowiki>[https://en.uncyclopedia.co/w/index.php?title=Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}}_{{CURRENTDAY}}&action=submit edit]<nowiki>]</nowiki></span></h2>
  
<h2>On this day&nbsp;<span style="font-weight:normal; font-size:80%; display:none;" class="plainlinks featurecode interface-show"><nowiki>[</nowiki>[https://en.uncyclopedia.co/w/index.php?title=Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}}_{{CURRENTDAY}}&action=submit edit]<nowiki>]</nowiki></span></h2>
 
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<div style="text-align:right; clear:both">'''[[Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/{{#time:F}}|Archive]]''' {{·}} '''[[Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/{{#time:F j}}|View today]]''' {{·}} '''[[Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/{{#time:F j|+1 day}}|View tomorrow]]'''</div>
  
<div style="text-align:right; clear:both">'''[[Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/{{#time:F}}|Archive]]''' {{·}} '''[[Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/{{#time:F j}}|View today]]''' {{·}} '''[[Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/{{#time:F j|+1 day}}|View tomorrow]]'''</div>
 
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Revision as of 08:06, 21 June 2021

Portals/C

From today's featured article 

Dmitri Medvedev.jpg

Dmitry Putinovich Medvedev (Russian: Димо Медвед; born 14 September 1965) is the undisputed Prime Minister of the Russian Federation. Medvedev is noted for his harsh stance on individuality and for his loyalty to his President. He was also President of the Russian Federation between 2008 and 2012 although it is easy for many to forget this, or indeed not to have noticed.

It is December 2007. Vladimir Putin, Russia's strongest, handsomest, most popular president of all time, is nearing the end of his second term in office. He cannot constitutionally continue as his country's dear leader any longer. It is time for the great man to fade into the political background. It is time for new leadership, new ideas, new militarism. Step forward, Putin's right hand man, Dmitry Medvedev. (Full article...)

Did you know... 

Air Force technologies.jpg
  • ... that if you poke a whale in the tummy it will giggle like a schoolgirl?
  • ... that I am writing this from beyond the grave?
  • ... that Minecraft developers are flat earthers?
  • ... that en passant is actually French for "inventing new rules as you go along?"
  • ... that 'wax-on, wax-off' doesn't help teach kids karate, but just gets your cars waxed, free of charge?
  • ... that oxygen is a highly addictive drug, with 100% of all users becoming addicted with their first hit?
  • ... that in order to complete the video game World of Warcraft, over one cubic mile of animals must be clicked?
  

In the news 

StarmerDigitalID.png
One simply cannot piss until he scans this.

Ongoing: The wait for GTA VI, Stranger Things 5 and Spaceballs 2 • Russia/Ukraine and Israel/Hamas "peace talks" • Trump and Elon's couples therapy • Jerry Jones screwing the Dallas Cowboys • Kids and pregnant moms trying to gain "super autism powers" by binging on Tylenol • Democrats and Republicans throwing hissy fits in Washington

Recent deaths: FUBAR • Cartoon Network on Comcast's basic cable package • Sydney Sweeney's new movie • Terence Stamp • The Devil's Rejects Unrated Director's Cut 4K (also Saw 2 & 3) • Trump's pet sloth • Joe Burrow's toe • Robert Redford • Baltimore Ravens' pride • New York Mets' postseason dreams • The US Government's money • Jane Goodall

Upcoming deaths: DEI • R. Kelly and Bryan Kohberger (in jail) • Iran's nuclear program • Diddy's bank account • The flowers you bring Alan Bergman • Dallas Cowboys', Cincinnati Bengals' and Baltimore Ravens' seasons • MSNBC • Lil Nas X • Donald Trump • Windows 10 • Kids and moms trying to gain autism powers from Tylenol

On this day 

Sophia prefers real sex to telegraph sex.

October 5: National Telegraph Appreciation Day (brought to you by TT&A, your local telegraph provider)

  • 1337 BC - The telegraph is invented by Greek inventor Teleos Graphodopoulos.
  • 337 BC - Alexander the Great celebrates 1,000th anniversary of telegraphy by having world's first telegraph sex with his lover, George Michael; boasts of his "long dash."
  • 663 - Mohammed telegraphs his intentions to destroy all Christian infidels. Celebrations of telegraph's 2,000th anniversary are cancelled.
  • 1371 - Blinding snowstorm snarls traffic, downs telegraph lines in Ming Dynasty's first test of emergency preparedness.
  • 1921 - The World Series was broadcast on the radio for the first time. Telegraph announcer at the World Series loses all fingers trying to keep up. He sues all radio owners making them give him their fingers; He now has over a million fingers on each hand.
  • 1926 - The first error 404 appeared in a telegraph (in this thing called the "internet")
  • 1931 - Before crashing in France, the British airship R101 sends an urgent SOS telegram, until they realize there's nothing connected onto the other end of it.
  • 2006 - Google and SUN Microsystems release their thin-client telegraph server, codenamed GTelegraph, to combat Microsoft.
  • 2006 - Western Union cancels telegraphic service, saying "We're gonna try out this new telly-phone deal the kids are so fond of."

Picture of the day

"ShitterParadox.png
 You know what they say, "You can't shit a shitter". But M.C. Escher will be damned if he didn't try!

Image credit: KneeChee27
View image · Nominate new image · View all featured images

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