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The Finno-Korean Hyperwar, also known as the Hwan-Suomi Hyperwar, was an ancient war between the two most powerful empires in the world at the time. The Proto-Finnic Holy Roman Khaganate faced off against the Hwan Empire in a cataclysmic conflict that crashed the world with almost no remnants of humanity. Few groups survived the war, which claimed both the Proto-Finnic Khaganate and the Hwan Empire. It is well known for bringing the end of the Hyper Era and tossing the world into a "dark age". The war was fought from 12,245 to 12,172 BC. It is commonly debated how great of a role the secondary powers (such as the autistic dogsled-riding Yupik Eskimos) played in the war, as it is suggested that important powers like the Armenian Pipe Smoking Autocrats, the Norf-Zogs and Egyptian technocracies allied with the Hwan to stop the Finnish alongside the Pre-Irish Holy Jihadists and Neo-Swiss Banking Fanatics. The war is usually said to have begun with the Hwan invasion of Finnish India and ended with a mutual exchange of experimental Hyperspace missile strikes that caused levels of manmade destruction unparalleled across the known multiverse. To this day all Hyperspace travel and communication is impossible due to the emergent Hyperstorm. Both empires rapidly collapsed and were not seen again for nearly a dozen millennia. Whilst the Hwan are considered to have been technically victorious Followed by the outbreak of autism by the last emperor of the Hwan Empire, neither empire lasted long and humanity reverted back to cave dwelling and beleiving in religion again. (Full article...)

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On this day [edit]

April 7: Raptor Jesus Day

33 AD - Jesus Christ arrives in Jerusalem on the back of a humble velociraptor. (Pictured)
1078 - The first ever Battle of Hastings re-enactment is fought, Normans complain about historically inaccurate armor.
1544 - Queen Elizabeth I starts her famous celebrity gossip column in The Times of London.
1906 - Mt. Vesuvius erupts due to a bout of tectonic indigestion, kindly Italian grandmas douse the volcano with olive oil.
1940 - Booker T. Washington becomes the first African-American to be featured in a postage stamp, racists unsure how to mail their letters of complaint.
1948 - The World Health Organization is created by the UN, to act as the inept organization in movies that fails to stop the zombie apocalypse.

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DJ Beathoven was one of the early pioneers of dubstep. He is known for the unique wubwubwubwubwubwubwubwub sound of his music.

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