User:My Face Is Beautiful/Beautifulopedia
From today's featured bees
It may come as a surprise to many people that the cult of the celebrity, seemingly a modern phenomenon, has in fact been around since the earliest days of history. Indeed, BIBLE!, a weekly magazine specialising in celebrity news and human-interest stories, was first published in what is now the Middle East on October 22nd, 4004 BCE and enjoyed several thousand years as a best-selling title until its eventual closure in the middle of the 2nd Century CE. Despite this, demand for the magazine remained high and as a result the entire print run was collated into a compendium issue which remains in print and sells many millions of copies each year. (Full article...)
I know you don't know...
- ... that a smiling Joe Pesci is never a good thing? (Pictured)
- ...that your fly is unzipped?
- ...the IRS is asking what's love got to do with your taxes?
- ...that virgins are actually alien beings with zero sex organs, and reproduce via telekinesis?
- ... that I just had sex, and hey do you got any napkins?
- ... that the average human male between the ages of 18 and 42 has thought about sex with Brad Pitt at least once?
- ...that Ram Ranch really rocks?
- ... that 5/3 people cannot do fractions?
Extra! Extra! Read all about it!
- Trump sends condolences to tough-guy actor "Mikey Madison" (Pictured)
- Clint Eastwood announces plans to live forever
- Trumpman introduces Trumpmobile
- Diddy gets off easy, possibly due to bribing jury
- Musk establishes "Porky Pig Party" to combat Trump's "Big Beautiful Bill"
- United Nations Secretary General gives up on world peace, World War Three begins
- Netanyahu and Khamenei get it on
- Trump joins in for threesome, blows load
- Khamenei fails to follow up after dirty talk, taps out
- Elon Musk breaks up with Trump
- Trump sends condolences to "Sly Stallone"
- Trump celebrates TACO Wednesday by reversing course on long-held campaign promise
- THE ROCKIES HAVE WON A SERIES!
Ongoing: The wait for GTA VI, Silksong, TAWOG, Stranger Things 5, and Spaceballs 2 • Russian Invasion • Gaza War • Trump and Elon's feud.. make up.. no one knows anymore • Animal-related live-action remakes kicking Snow White's ass • Jaws 50th anniversary • Colorado Rockies game replacing Jaws airing • Israel/Iran "peace talks" • Pittsburgh Steelers adding old players way past their prime • Rock drummer exodus (not to be confused with Tom Hunting or Zbigniew Fyk)
Recent deaths: Ariana Grande's Nonna • Canadian team's bid to win the Stanley Cup, again • PF4Eva's headphone cable • Jimmy Swaggart • Diddy's freedom for only 20 years • Michael Madsen • Diogo Jota
Upcoming deaths: DEI • Tom Cruise's career of sprinting on-screen • Pittsburgh Steelers' locker room • Greta Thunberg? • R. Kelly • Iran's nuclear program • Oil prices • Dumbasses with fireworks in their backyards • Diddy's bank account after incoming lawsuits • The asshats who spoiled Squid Game
*sigh* what's happening now?
July 8: Pregnancy Appreciation Day
- 1300 - The Navajo invent Antbortion.
- 1682 - The Ovum is first viewed through a microscope.
- 1838 - American Evangelists begin teaching that being born again is necessary for salvation.
- 1973 - Backstreet abortionists are run out of business by legal abortion clinics.
- 1974 - Planned Parenthood is founded, preforming free abortions in exchange for money and referring friends to do the same.
- 1981 - The first successful hotwiring of a uterus is preformed.
- 1998 - AMA publishes: HowTo:Deliver a Baby, A Concise and Easy-to-follow Guide Developed, Tested, and Approved by the AMA (No, Not that AMA. The Other One) and Reprinted with the Permission of the JAMA (Also a Different One).
- 2008 - Sarah Palin's daughter's unborn child falls pregnant
My favorite pictures
A screenshot of MS Paint, an image manipulation program. Image credit: Nonymous |
For starters
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- Policies and guidelines – for the boring rules no one follows
- Formatting – for help on editing
- Requested articles – for inspiration, or lack thereof
- Village Dump – to throw angry invectives at other users
- Community portal – for general community shenanigans
Mini projects
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The Foundation
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This Uncyclopedia is written in English, supposedly. Started in 2005, it currently contains 40,271 articles. Many other parody wikis are available; some of the lamest are listed below.
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