User:My Face Is Beautiful/Beautifulopedia

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Welcome to Beautifulopedia,
the content-free ripoff of Opossumopedia.
69 active tung tung tung sahurs • 40,863 mistakes I've ever made

From today's featured bees 

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Ah, to disguise oneself! One of life's little pleasures. If someone doesn't like who they are, they can just turn around, click their heels three times, and become anybody! Movie stars, presidents, queens, kings, and rabbits, all within the reach of any lad or lass who can shuffle in off the street, throw down a little cash on the counter of their local costume shop, and with a gleam in their eye and confidence in their voice say, "Remake me, motherplugger!"

Disguises (a.k.a. costumes, masks, and cosmetics) have a long history and a longer psychological profile. They come out when you least expect it, and they wander the streets riding on top of children when you most expect it (a.k.a. Halloween). Disguises parade, flirt, and intoxicate themselves at carnivale, Mardi Gras, and costume parties. And disguises always emerge triumphant, bless their hearts, before going back to live in their box or closet to patiently await their next mischievous and free-spirited adventure. (Full article...)

I know you don't know... 

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Extra! Extra! Read all about it! 

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One simply cannot piss until he scans this.

Ongoing: The wait for GTA VI, Stranger Things 5 and Spaceballs 2 • Russia-Ukraine "peace talks" • ICE/Antifa clashes • Trump and Elon couples therapy • Jerry Jones screwing the Dallas Cowboys • Pregnant moms taking Tylenol to give their babies "autism powers" • Democrats and Republicans throwing hissy fits in D.C.

Recent deaths: Trump's pet slothRobert RedfordU.S. Federal GovernmentJane GoodallThe Yankees' World Series dreams • Diane KeatonGaza WarDrew StruzanWindows 10D'AngeloYouTube player's old design • Ace Frehley • Any hopes for a KISS reunion

Upcoming deaths: DEIIran's nuclear program • Diddy's bank account • MSNBCDonald Trump • Aforementioned Tylenol moms • Mark Butt-fumble's career and freedom • Coral reefs

*sigh* what's happening now? 

Evil villains are instantly recognisable by their top hats and outrageous moustaches.

October 24: Evil Villian Appreciation Day, National Put The Ramones On at Full Volume And Piss Off The Neighbors Day

  • 1867 - After mass revolt by the Australian and New Zealand governments, Harry becomes Guardian of UCT
  • 1889 - First recorded use of pure hearted maiden, strapped to railroad tracks, to attract a ransom; the deed, while dastardly, merely attracts Royal Canadian Mounted Police who save the girl and thwart the plan.
  • 1931 - Polish schoolboy Joseph Ratzinger is arrested for arson, rape and general troublemaking. The Pope declares this day an International catholic holiday.
  • 1941 - Hitler writes the lyrics of "Blitzkrieg Bop". Later becomes a hit song by The Ramones.
  • 1943 - Morrocco becomes capital of evil villains; they are simply fed up to "here" with Hitler's needy personality
  • 1969 - Your second-grade teacher, mean old Miss Masters takes away your favorite doll and holds it ransom; demands that you earn an "A" on your spelling test or "Dolly gets it"
  • 1977 - Habitat for Humanity contemplates rebuilding the Big Bad Wolf's house for charity. Instead decides on Euthanasia as a more cost-sensitive option.
  • 1984 - A science teacher from Great Yarmouth sends his class zipwiring down pylon wires, claiming a man who looked a spitting image of Osama Bin Laden told him to do so. It turned out to be the janitor. Incredibly, no-one was even injured and everyone cleared the zipline.
  • 2005 - Dick Cheney gets a dozen roses.
  • 2006 - George Bush holds Ramone concert; all of Canada kept awake until 3am
  • 2007 - Harry Potter 7 comes out -SPOILER: Voldemort idealised as upstanding being, wins Hermione's heart. In desperation Harry becomes gay.

My favorite pictures

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When Moses finally reached the top of Mount Sinai he was surprised to find God had left him the holy iPad; complete with the ten commandments, the angry birds app, and all!

Image credit: Magic man and his friend.
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For starters

Mini projects

Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects as well as some foreign language Uncyclopedias and Illogicopedia.

Indistinguishable others

This Uncyclopedia is written in English, supposedly. Started in 2005, it currently contains 40,863 articles. Many other parody wikis are available; some of the lamest are listed below.