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From today's featured article
Gas tungsten arc welding is just one of many exciting possibilities in the glorious world of welding. It uses a nonconsumable tungsten electrode to produce a quite fascinating thingumy made of metals all stuck together in a sort of tungstenny mass, but without the excess residue, embarrassment or shame of ordinary welding.
The common view of the general public, by which I mean that large group of generalised unwashed people who count for such things, and of whom I may truthfully count none as my friends - gas tungsten arc welding is not as interesting as going to discos and playing loud music on illuminated stereophonic devices. But to these people, it has to be said, "fiddlesticks", and perhaps even "fiddlesticks with knobs welded on", for in actuality and reality, there is nothing quite as interesting, and dare I say it, erotic, on God's goodly earth, as welding with gas.
Now, I raised the thorny issue of sex there, and I did so with serious purpose of mind. For it has to be said that gas tungsten arc welding is almost like sex in every way, except without all that heavy panting and tongues and squelching. Some people, you should know, actually prefer welding to sex. Grown men can find real passion with a rod of tungsten, some gas and an arc. And that, my friend, there is nothing weird about. Maybe you think there is. If so, please remember.... gas tungsten arc welding can also be used to make bombs. (Full article...)
Did you know...
- ... that Kilroy was here? (Pictured)
- ... that if you breed a Bulldog and a Shih Tzu; you will get a Bullshit?
- ... that dihydrogen monoxide is a substance found in car exhaust, pesticides, acid rain, and your energy drink?
- ... that if you die in Canada, you die in real life?
- ... that the keyboard you have been using has more germs than your toilet seat?
- ... that the comic strip Fred Basset is interesting but not in the sense that might be expected of a comic strip?
- ... that you can fry a potato but not a potatoe, according to the Potato-tomato theorem?
- ... that the Russian Reversal is the common English term for the phenomenon during which a person descended from Russia is spontaneously turned around?
In the news
- Fire-type Pokémon Typhlosion faced with rampant sexual harrasment charges
- 10 out of 9 people unable to use a number line
- David Duke endorses Jill Stein, claims Trump "not racist enough"
- Doctor: Kamala Harris not elderly white man with dementia
- Rapper and rapist Sean "P. Diddler" Combs admits to baby oil addiction (Pictured)
- Joe Biden slips up, "accidentally" endorses Trump on Instagram
- Lon Chaney and son endorse Kamala Harris
- Lucy makes surprise appearance in fighting video game
- And on SNL!
- 16 Takeaways on why news stories these days are dominated by takeaways
- Florida Man tries and fails to get Trump shot again. Nobody cares this time, not even Trump.
- Ukraine finally plays its Uno Reverse card against Russia
- Tommy Wiseau making movie on cocaine sharks
- Harris announces shark as running mate
- Trump: How could an Indian be Black?
- Nigel Farage blames murder on migrants and sucks Trump's dick
- YouTuber Mr. Beast really professional fraudster.
- Olympic Games begin with Lady Gaga at opening ceremony
- Cocaine sharks now in Brazil
- Michael Bay working on Skibidi Toilet movie
Ongoing: Russian Invasion • Israel-Hamas conflict • United States presidential election • FOOBAW season!
Recent deaths: Kris Kristofferson • John Ashton (no, not Gomez. That guy from Beverly Hills Cop. The one who isn't Judge Reinhold or Paul Reiser or Bronson Pinchot. Yeah, him.) • Rafael Nadal's tennis career • Liam Payne • The chances of a One Direction reunion
Upcoming deaths: Vladimir Putin • Kate Middleton • NFL fans' attention to their wives and girlfriends • Noam Chomsky • Google as a monopoly • Fútbol season • Coldplay
On this day
October 18: International Funk Day (Portugal), Radiation Day
- 0023 - God lost control of the universe yet again, causing countless miracles. Luckily, Jesus thought fast and found an explanation for all those fish everywhere.
- 1000 - Due to linguistical differences in many parts of the world, many people have unfortunately mixed up International Funk Day with International Spunk Day. Kleenex has a field day.
- 1955 - All Hell Breaks Loose in Wittinghermandershire Upon Broohavensmarshington, England when a portal to the dark underworld is discovered by a chimney sweep mistaking an inconspicuous closet door for that of the men's lavatory in a small, inconspicuous pub. The scene of dark beings invading the earth is compounded by the fact that the chimney sweep failed to realize that the "urinal" into which he chose to relieve himself was, in fact, a dark being. And, although dark beings are, in fact, dark beings, they do have feelings too and do not, contrary to popular belief, appreciate being urinated upon by chimney sweeps.
- 1960 - Funk music, Jazz's retarded brother is born.
- 1978 - U.S. President George Clinton puts Portugal under a groove. Portuguese population introduced to blow.
- 2002 - Jacques Chirac is elected in France, funky disco dancing ensues.
- 2002 - Parisians realize how gay Disco Dancing is, rioting ensues.
- 2006 - Kim Jong Il funks the world with Mass Destruction, giving celebration to all of the days' occasions.
- 2557- 25 different types of cheese are discovered on the bottom of the ocean. Scientists are baffled and manage to retrieve 16 of the different types. A German hypnotist later publishes the findings in a kids weekly coloring book; it becomes an instant best seller.
Picture of the day
Children's books as they should be, without sugar-coating. Image credit: Bonjo Nelson |
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