User talk : EricIsOnFire

Better sign it.

June 20, 2022 • Issue #215 • The Yankees STILL SUCK!

I HAVE STOLEN YOUR UNSIGNPOST!

Hello, Uncyclopedians. It is with great UnPleasure that I say that I, ARandomPage, pictured to the left, have stolen your UnSignpost, and am now the lead writer, sandwich-thrower, picture-stealer, and UnSignpost-er! URA HA HA! But fear not. I am willing to give you back your UnSignpost... for a high price of winning a Sandwich of the Month. wait. What? Now I have to actually write UnSignposts regularly? What do you mean I'm not an admin and can't write this thing yet? What do you mean by "the role of sandwich-thrower is one you just made up?".. GOD.

DAMMIT.

Sandwich of the Month is finally up!

Yes, you heard that right! After 12 years and 5 months, we FINALLY made a Sandwich of the Month award! No more broken Sandwich of the Month link that just goes to Vote for Sysop; there's actually a Sandwich of the Month award now! This new award is used as a glorified thanks system. Or exactly the opposite. Yeah, uh... That's it. I don't know how to explain further. Templates for it were made as well, I guess. The best part? It's not on the award template, because whoever made the award can't edit fully-protected pages and is too lazy to make an edit request! Wait a second. That's the best part? Who put THAT sentence in?..

ARandomPage has gone crazy!

By Unnamed Space

BREAKING NEWS! It has been discovered that ARandomPage, one of Uncyclopedia's newer editors, is apparently a madman with too much time on their hands. A full list of their crimes is here:

Opening the floodgates stopping the fish migration
Labelling everyone traitors who deserve "depth"
Naming an entire war-conflict-fiasco without any consensus
Not bothering to finish either of their articles
Fixing errors... wait, no, that's a good thing
Vandalizing the Hobo Queen 2's page
Stealing the UnSignpost
Rearranging the UnSignpost... wait, I think it works better this way
Not even bothering to check if anyone else has plans to steal the UnSignpost

Biopic

This edition's biopic is one on stealing the UnSignpost. Since for some reason, literally nobody bothers to check on the UnSignpost, people can easily steal the UnSignpost... up to the part where they have to message Cassie, a sporadically-active bureaucrat, about delivering it. That, or manually deliver their stolen work to every UnSignpost subscriber... or, since you're doing it manually, just every active user. Hey, that's not such a bad idea! I'LL DO IT!

From The Logs

May 29, 2022 JJPMaster protected User talk:MrX [Edit=Allow only autoconfirmed users] (indefinite) [Move=Allow only autoconfirmed users] (indefinite) (Persistent shoe puppetry)

May 27, 2022 MrX changed block settings for Crocotta1 with an expiration time of 15:38, June 20, 2022 (account creation disabled, email disabled) (Continuous violation of her UN:OFFICE sanctions. See talkpage. Granting TPA, Cat, I hope you don't mind.)

May 12, 2022 PF4Eva blocked ARandomPage with an expiration time of 12 hours (account creation disabled, email disabled, cannot edit own talk page) (Pony-hating nonsense)

Top VFH Competitors

VFH Highlight Of The Week

HowTo:Get Expelled from School (6/0)

From The Forums

UnSignpost News

ARandomPage steals the UnSignpost. Read the first section for more.

Quote(s) of the Week

..... IRC is dead. And I can't grab a quote from Discord since I don't have Discord.

Notes

ARandomPage, also named Space (ARandomTalkPage) (ARandomContributionsPage) 00:06, 20 June 2022 (UTC)

UnSignpost delivery for July 10, 2022[edit source]

The Newspaper 9 out of 10 Dentists Agree On! Fuck you, Dr. Miller!

July 10, 2022 • Issue #216 • The Periodical That Is Too Sexy For Its Shirt, Among Other Things

UN:OFFICE user comes back behaving much better

The former problem user known as Crocotta1, listed on UN:OFFICE for various reasons, has returned about... 2 months ago, showing much better behavior than before. While her issues are not entirely gone and there are issues unmentioned in the Office report, she appears to be much better in managing them now. We here at the UnSignpost hope this situation gets even better, as one of our editors appears to be rather harsh to Crocotta1 over the various vents she places on talkpages and numerous sexual references.

The UnSignpost needs your help!

That's right, the basically-dead UnSignpost needs your help so that it works better. Now, before you leave HATE HATE HATs on ARandomPage's talkpage, let him explain. From his words: "The UnSignpost template in its current form is broken, as selecting the words/links/whatevers on the main stories will direct you to the logs section instead. I tried to fix it, but that broke some talkpages by centering their header text. Microsoft for POTUS also tried to fix it, solving both issues, but creating another one in that their version of the UnSignpost template looked a bit... ugly." And there you have it, the current situation of the UnSignpost wrapper template. If you are reading this and want to help out, message Page and discuss it with him (sorry, we couldn't find anyone else to direct you to) or fix it himself. I'm sure the idiot space will notice.

Biopic

This biopic is about being too lazy to get stuff done. For example, almost every editor and admin here is too lazy to keep this place feeling alive. The lead and only editor of the UnSignpost, ARandomPage, is too lazy to bring out regularly-scheduled UnSignposts, nor write an actual good biopic, which is why this is the "biopic" you'll be getting this issue.

From The Logs

There are literally no interesting logs, so the logs section will be empty.

...

...

Top VFH Competitors

UnNews:Stan Marsh presents: 2022 FIFA World Cup (4/0)
Door (4/0)
Jussie Smollett (3/0)

VFH Highlight Of The Week

i burning your dog (9/0)

From The Forums

UnSignpost News

ARandomPage is considering throwing UnSignposts into every active extended-confirmed user's talkpage, minus the ones who remove the UnSignposts.

Quote(s) of the Week

From now on, I will make Discord quotes up because I DON'T HAVE DISCORD. "PF4Eva: i'm thinking of blocking page for his bold edits, its starting to look reckless"

Notes

ARandomPage, also named Space (ARandomTalkPage) (ARandomContributionsPage) 02:19, 10 July 2022 (UTC)

UnSignpost delivery for August 19, 2022[edit source]

You'd be crazy not to listen!

August 19, 2022 • Issue #217 • STOP... SIGNPOST TIME!!

MrX and Crocotta1's talkpages have been attacked!

Two anonymous vandals have attacked MrX's talkpage with spam, with one of them doing the same to both Crocotta1 and BraGreMat. MrX was absent during a latter part of the attack, Crocotta1 appears to be quite rude to these vandals, and BraGreMat is probably tired of reverting things all the time. Meanwhile, our self-proclaimed "chief editor" watched the madness, reverted a few times, and said stuff about the situation. He didn't even bother to make an UnSignpost about it until now! Ban this idiot already! Leave HATE HATE HATs on his talkpage, I demand justice!

There are errors in the Main Page!

That is correct, there are slight grammar/formatting errors in the Main Page of all pages. The errors were found by Brogo13 as a result of Page trying to place the Main Page on wheels for "Willy on Wheels Day", which is the date that Willy on Wheels first vandalized Wikipedia. That date is August 20. Page is in disbelief over the current state of his life, inability to finish his WIPs, and the admins' lack of time to spot and fix the errors in what might be Uncyclopedia's most important page. Also, he failed to finish placing the Main Page on Wheels.

Kiko4564 has returned!

The banned user known as "Kiko4564" has returned, under the not-very-subtle username of Kiko4564 Is Back. Their intention is still unclear, at least to us, but there's a good chance it's not malicious. When first banned, Kiko had an "Extremely long history of being a complete twat, both on-wiki and on IRC". They were also a Wikipedia sockpuppeteer, but that's not our business. Due to all this madness, our incompetent chief editor decided that it's a good idea to throw this edition into Kiko4564's talkpage. MrX, I beg of you, ban ARandomPage already. He's too incompetent to be in charge of the UnSignpost.

Biopic

This biopic is about conciseness and its benefits and drawbacks. The benefits: Your text is shorter. The drawbacks: Your text is shorter.

From The Logs

13:30, August 14, 2022: User account Kiko4564 Is Back (talk * contribs) was created

There are no more interesting logs

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Top VFH Competitors

Josh Allen (4/0)
Lost (2/0)
UnNews:Ayman al-Zawahiri loses a "Connect 4" matchup against Joe Biden (1/0)

VFH Highlight Of The Week

Peng Shui (7/0)

From The Forums

UnSignpost News

ARandomPage is still too lazy to make UnSignposts, and has neglected to make an UnSignpost on the MrX talkpage attack for over a week. However, that waiting did give him two stories, so...?

Quote(s) of the Week

Cassie:

Notes

ARandomPage, also named Space (ARandomTalkPage) (ARandomContributionsPage) 04:14, 19 August 2022 (UTC)

UnSignpost delivery for October 21, 2022[edit source]

Reading This Is The Mysterious Second Step To Getting Profit From Stealing Childrens' Underwear!

October 21, 2022 • Issue #218 • Now With 0 Trans Fat!

L10nM4st3r messed up his account and then forgets his password!

On October 17, 2022, L10nM4st3r broke his account by idiotically ruining how he views Uncyclopedia by testing (and breaking) his personal CSS file. He informed MrX about it, and the edit was reverted. Unfortunately for everyone involved, L10n then proceeded to completely forget his Uncyclopedia password, forcing him to create a new account, L10nM4st3r (2). He has now in the process of recovered what he can, and Kippy was able to rename him back.

During the temporary, scary, and confusing aftermath, Crocotta1 thought that L10n made her a new account when he called her "Crocotta2". It's very clear that lions deserve depth just as much as ponies and cats do. Something will be done about this.

Several users plot to vandalize Wikipedia, but sadly have their plan foiled

On October 18, 2022, Microsoft for POTUS started a thread on MrX's talkpage about vandalizing Wikipedia. L10nM4st3r then reported it to a Wikipedian, revealing his true allegiance to about a few people. BraGreMat also joined in the discussion, with a very interesting story about how they changed some template names a little bit and these changes went unnoticed for about two hours, which is pretty impressive once you realize how big Wikipedia and its community is. ARandomPage also left a comment, stating that he'd like to see an overly bureaucratic part of Wikipedia get vandalized. This sparked a small talk between Page and Microsoft about Wikipedia reporting IPs, which ended when they realized that people's IPs won't get reported just because they vandalized a website a little. L10n then stated that he would not hesitate to betray us in Wikipedia territory.

In other news, ARandomPage is a traitor to one of his own kind. Next story...

MrX's talkpage attacked by Svex! Again!

In a shocking act of betrayal, the recently-crowned admin known as Svex 88134kg has vandalized the talkpages of several Uncyclopedians, and even made a hate page on BraGreMat! This led to BraGreMat going on the Uncyclopedia Discord, reporting the spammer, and getting no response, leading to ARandomPage's first real finding of a Chat Quote. Once again, this vandal has been temporarily stopped and all their vandalisms deleted, and also I'm out of stuff to write on, so on to our monthly biopic!

Biopic

This biopic is about nonexistent biopics. Nonexistent biopics are very simple to create, as the first and only step of creating one is to

From The Logs

October 17, 2022: User account L10nM4st3r (2) (talk * contribs) was created

October 20, 2022: Microsoft for POTUS cleans up a mess of L10n's pages

October 21, 2022 Kippy (talk * contribs) renamed user L10nM4st3r (2) (263 edits) to L10nM4st3r

Top VFH Competitors

VFH Highlight Of The Week

Uncyclopedia:VFH (7/1)

From The Forums

UnSignpost News

ARandomPage finally has a Discord account.

Quote(s) of the Week

BraGreMat ™:"Apparently this is the worst time to get a response. Noted for future reference"

Notes

ARandomPage, also named Space (ARandomTalkPage) (ARandomContributionsPage) 04:42, 21 October 2022 (UTC)

SPECIAL Delivery of the UnSignpost for October 23, 2022![edit source]

reader, i remember you're papercides

October 23, 2022 • Issue #219 • All your readers are belong to us

SPECIAL EDITION!!! Main Page deleted!