From today's featured article
The Westboro Baptist Church is the lone bastion of reason and morality in a world gone mad. Logically, it is located in Topeka, Kansas, home to intelligent design and the rock supergroup of the same name. The Church, which is rumored to have in excess of twelve members and growing by no less than none every year, is headed by misunderstood idiot-savant and knight-errant of goodness Fred Phelps, attorney-at-law.
Under Phelps' utterly creative, sometimes incendiary, and always visionary leadership, the Westboro Baptist Church has successfully drawn the ire of pretty much everyone in the world. It has achieved this well-thought-out and beneficial aim by rejoicing for natural disasters, the spread of disease, and other afflictions on humankind that are generally regarded by the rest of the world as a time for compassion and mourning. Ironically, due to its obsession with celebrating misery, the Church has itself in recent years invited what it considers unwelcome attention to its activities, including vicious beatings of its members, intermittent showerings of its compound with pig feces, and yet more vicious beatings of its members. (Full article...)
Did you know...
- ... that those suspicious white spots on your professor's blazer are in fact mayonnaise?
- ... that the A-bombs dropped on Japan were awarded the Nobel Peace Prize?
- ... that compromise is a great diplomatic tool? Although on an international level, a nuclear arsenal is even better?
- ... that if you put an ear up to a person's leg you can hear them say, "What the fuck are you doing?"
- ... that 98% of Americans have no idea what they would do in a hypothetical situation?
- ... that goldfish are neither gold nor fish?
- ... conjuction verb noun preposition article verb noun?
In the news
"One small step for you, one giant paycheck for me."
On this day
July 24: Pioneer Day (Utah), Polygamy Week Begins (Also Utah)
- 1132 – Battle of Nocera between Ranulf II of Alife and Roger II of Sicily takes place in Italy. Ranulf's fettucine narrowly bests Roger's linguine, and Italy adopts fettucine as the National Stereotypical Food.
- 1487 – Citizens of Leeuwarden, Netherlands, unsatisfied with watered-down domestics, rebel against a ban on foreign beer.
- 1947 – Brigham Young and all his merry wives arrive in Utah to establish Mormonism, and in doing so guaranteed that even the ugliest son of a bitch (pictured) can have multiple mates.
- 1983 – Hacker Richard M. Stallman launches the GNU project, an effort to protect the endangered gnu, a buffalo-like animal, from extinction using mainly open-source code.
- 2000 – While on the Presidential campaign trail, George W. Bush reads a helpful guide to living lifethat helps him on his way to the Oval Office.
- 2008 – The Dark Knight is released, becoming an instant box-office smash hit, and reaching the all-time pinnacle for film for all history.
- 2009 – I like the fact that you're reading the anniversaries right now. I really, really do.