Main Page
From today's featured article
Glorious Turkmenistan was one of the poultry republics that broke away from the USSR and, despite what partial nations claim, it has a long and glorious history; as long and glorious as that of Germany or the Ottoman Empire. Turkmenistan was the predecessor state to the Turkmen Empire before Turkmenistan won the Tatar War. The Tatar War was a large scale conflict where Gurbanguly Berdimuhamedow used horses to remake the Mongol Empire. Unhindered by his physical death on December 22, 2006, Turkmenistan continues to be ruled by Glorious President-for-life-and-afterlife Saparmurat Niyazov known locally as the Turkmenbashi or Great Leader of the Turkmen. It is Niyazov who made Turkmenistan the best nation the world has ever known during the happy years of his mortal presence as Glorious President. (Full article...)
Did you know...
- ... that there's only one word in the vocabulary of a customer service representative? (Pictured)
- ... that the lawman/outlaw Wild Bill Hickok had one of the most celebrated mustaches in the Wild West?
- ... that removing the rubber bands from the claws of a Lobster can result in oh god get it off get it OFF OH GOD MY FACE!
- ... that still lifes are the most interesting paintings?
- ... that sheep shrink when it rains?
- ... that genocide is a perfectly healthy response to any personal problems you may have?
- ... that sarcasm is a higher form of wit than the Russian Reversal?
- ... that genocide is a perfectly healthy response to any personal problems you may have?
In the news
- 2024 U.S. election cancelled due to absence of electoral votes, anarchy likely to follow (Pictured)
- TikToker Peanut the Squirrel swatted, killed for "illegal guns and drugs"
- Springfield infant arrested in second Trump shooting
- Obama to dead people: "Don't boo, vote!"
- Repeatedly haunted astronomers change the name of Betelgeuse
- Saw XI's poster design changed again
- 2024 Presidential election too close to call for the third day running
- President Biden apologizes for no apparent reason
- UnNews endorses Kamala Harris so the real news doesn't have to
- Conservative UnNews contributor rage-quits over this, then rejoins days later when he gets bored
- Donald Trump enlists former NFL problem child Antonio Brown, introduces Trump Fries
- Fire-type Pokémon Typhlosion faced with rampant sexual harrasment charges
- 10 out of 9 people unable to use a number line
- David Duke endorses Jill Stein, claims Trump "not racist enough"
- Doctor: Kamala Harris not elderly white man with dementia
- Rapper and rapist Sean "P. Diddler" Combs admits to baby oil addiction
- Joe Biden "accidentally" endorses Trump on Instagram
- Lon Chaney and son endorse Kamala Harris
- Lucy makes surprise appearance in fighting video game
- And on SNL!
- 16 Takeaways on why news stories these days are dominated by takeaways
- Florida Man tries and fails to get Trump shot again. Nobody cares this time, not even Trump.
Ongoing: Eurovision Song Contest • Russian Invasion • Israel-Hamas conflict • United States presidential election • Aaron Rodgers screwing over the New York Jets • The New York Yankees' World Series win drought, courtesy of the Dodgers
Recent deaths: Liam Payne • The chances of a One Direction reunion • Yahya Sinwar • Phil Lesh • Eurovision Song Contest • Quincy Jones • The Most Mysterious Song on the Internet
Upcoming deaths: Vladimir Putin • Kate Middleton • Your fantasy football team's playoff chances • Noam Chomsky • Google as a monopoly • Coldplay
On this day
November 5: Remember, remember, the fifth of November: Explode The Government Day (Britain)
- 1605 - The Parliament building fails to explode.
- 1854 - Anonymous inventor skinned while testing early hydraulic barber chair.
- 1900 - Despite widespread panic and rumors in proposition, Big Ben doesn't explode, but the Prime Minister does.
- 1984 - Despite the Brotherhood's efforts, Big Brother is not wounded in a suicide bombing. Lets thank him for increasing our chocolate to 20 grams!
- 1987 - Margaret Thatcher's imminent Silent But Deadly reaches critical mass and explodes in her intestine.
- 2022 - Some guy wearing a mask in London blows some shit up, rioting doesn't ensue (it's England NOT France)
Picture of the day
9-Eleven, a world-wide chain of convenience stores serving the needs of those who seek to overthrow whichever hated oppressor is in vogue at the time, is now owned by a conglomeration of businessmen operating out of Afghanistan for tax purposes. People often call them when they need fat. In a bun. Image credit: FreeMorpheme |
Other areas of Uncyclopedia
- How to be funny and not just stupid – for help with that comedy thing
- Policies and guidelines – for the boring rules no one follows
- Formatting – for help on editing
- Requested articles – for inspiration, or lack thereof
- Village Dump – to throw angry invectives at other users
- Community portal – for general community shenanigans
Sister projects
-
UnNews
News on crack -
Uncyclopedia
The content-free encyclopedia -
Undictionary
Best left unsaid -
UnTunes
Noisy things -
UnGames
Ways to waste away -
HowTo
Like Ikea without the pictures -
UnBooks
Content-free books -
Unquotable
Useless misquotes -
Uncycloversity
No student loans -
UnPoetia
Dreams deferred -
UnDebate
Debate the irrelevant -
UnScripts
We ruin stage too -
Why?
Because -
UnReviews
Hack frauds -
UnVoyage
Armchair travel -
Uncyclomedia
The Foundation
Uncyclopedia languages
This Uncyclopedia is written in English, supposedly. Started in 2005, it currently contains 38,289 articles. Many other parody wikis are available; some of the lamest are listed below.
- More than 10,000 articles: Português · Boarisch · 日本語 · Polski · Plattdüütsch · Italiano · Español · Français
- More than 1,000 articles: Suomi · Dansk · Deutsch · 한국어 · 正體中文 · 汉语 · Русский · Norsk (Bokmål) · Bahasa Indonesia · Česky · ไทย · Esperanto · Ελληνικά · Nederlands · Galego · עברית · Svenska · Slovenčina · Magyar · Українська
- More than 100 articles: فارسی · عَرَبِيّ · Türkçe · Català · Norsk (Nynorsk) · Српски / Srpski · Hrvatski · Lietuvių · Latina · Tagalog · Български · Simple English · Latviešu · Mirandés · Македонски · Română · Cymraeg