User talk:An Ape that Only Exists on Thursdays/archive3

Pops Cherry

—Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 16:24, 4 July 2009 (UTC)

You have made a man out of me my talkpage. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 16:28, 4 July 2009 (UTC)

Damn. I was trying to turn you your talkpage into a chick. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 16:30, 4 July 2009 (UTC)

Do you have a knife and some white spirits? -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 16:35, 4 July 2009 (UTC)

I left them at home. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 16:36, 4 July 2009 (UTC)

colonization

hey ape, thanks for joining colonization!! feel free to dive right in by contributing at Uncyclopedia:Imperial Colonization/project, where we do all of our work. we're wrapping up our colonization of You, but our next one should be up shortly. again, welcome! SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 16:56, 9 July 2009 (UTC)

also, thanks for the story in the signpost! oftentimes i have to produce an entire issue myself, so it's a welcome relief to see someone awesome contributing! SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 18:50, 9 July 2009 (UTC)

also also, the only change i made to the signpost article was the image, since i really like that michael jackson image by sonje. is that acceptable? SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 18:57, 9 July 2009 (UTC)

Yeah thats fine. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 19:24, 9 July 2009 (UTC)

Hell-o

I-Just-Wanted-To-Say-That-You-Are-A-Very-Important-Member-Of-This-Website-And-When-Looking-At-Your-Talkpage-I-Recognized-This-Immediately. A-Robot 17:35, 11 July 2009 (UTC)

I've been meaning to tell you for the past 8 hours

I'm not sure how to break this to you but last night I had a dream which appeared to have you in it; now this is ridiculous I know, however it happened. I don't have a clue who you are, nor have I ever talked to you, however your name seemed to inspire some subconscious obsession and so planted into my dream you were. Also, you were in the form of a woman, I don't know if you're a guy or a girl, or if you've even decided however you appeared to be as a girl. You didn't even have a proper name, I kept calling you Ape which at the time I was afraid to do in case I offended you.

I just thought I should inform you of this development. I hope you are well and stuff.

--Sir Sunbeam no u F@H KUN 23:06, 11 July 2009 (UTC)

review

hey mr. thursdays, just wanted to let you know that Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/UnNews:Is the Government doing enough to appease the Sun God? was placed in the 'suspended review' category, since it is currently on VFH. should it expire or (as it looks to be on its way to) pass, you can then decide to place the review back in the queue or delete it. SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 16:54, 13 July 2009 (UTC)

so, as this has been featured, would you like to toss the review back into the active pile, or can it be deleted? SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 12:45, 14 July 2009 (UTC)

So...

...how about that, um, stuff? Sure is whacky, huh? Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 04:01, 14 July 2009 (UTC)

Um... nice weather we're having isn't it? -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 12:47, 14 July 2009 (UTC)

I wouldn't know. I'm not much for that whole "outside" thing. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 17:43, 14 July 2009 (UTC)

Yeah, outside sucks. I prefer to sit in the dark and type. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 18:13, 14 July 2009 (UTC)

That's too many things at once. If I tried that, I'd get dizzy and fall over. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 21:02, 14 July 2009 (UTC)

Wow

You know, despite having such an innocent looking username, you're agreessive.--Bad Shroom 20:16, 15 July 2009 (UTC)

Not usually, I just didn't like your tone, or something. It was probably my imagination. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 20:18, 15 July 2009 (UTC)

He's just exerting his dominance over you. It's ok, just let him finish. Picture yourself on a beach. Let the wave of submissiveness roll over you. Warm and sticky isn't it? Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 15:40, 16 July 2009 (UTC)

I am the alpha male!!! -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 16:45, 16 July 2009 (UTC)

Late to the party...

Please accept this nonexistent cake as my condolences? Colin ALL YOUR BASEHeaney! Casa Bey Superfly Portfolio 15:29, 16 July 2009 (UTC)

What flavour? -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 16:43, 16 July 2009 (UTC)

Actually it's just a box of Hostess Cupcakes filled with pot. Enjoy! Colin ALL YOUR BASEHeaney! Casa Bey Superfly Portfolio 22:35, 17 July 2009 (UTC)

Awesome. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 23:31, 17 July 2009 (UTC)

HowTo - write a Stephen King Novel

Why exactly did you strike out a vote on the page? ~ 15:49, 17 July 2009 (UTC)

The vote is still counted (check the numbers, I didn't discount the guys vote, and in fact changed it back when someone else tried to). The striking through of the text was to say "this is stupid, you don't know what you are talking about". But since the vote is still counted there's no harm done so please don't ban me ok? -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 16:07, 17 July 2009 (UTC)

For the record, that guy didn't know what he was talking about. -OptyC Sucks! CUN16:21, 17 Jul

Does anyone else sometimes feel that stupid people shouldn't be allowed to vote on VFH? I would never support it, but some people sure do get my goat when they don't seem to understand comedy of any kind, and vote against. Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 16:30, 17 July 2009 (UTC)

*Cough* Stairs *Cough* -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 16:45, 17 July 2009 (UTC)

There are so many that are worse. Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 16:47, 17 July 2009 (UTC)

Indeed. Have you seen that OptyC fellow? I swear he's retarded. -OptyC Sucks! CUN16:52, 17 Jul

Yes. But lets single out Staircase. He voted against my Ra thing. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 16:53, 17 July 2009 (UTC)

Also, OptyC sucks cos he causes edit conflicts. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 16:53, 17 July 2009 (UTC)

Are you trying to start a flamewar now Ape? Calm down please. Everyone is entitled to their opinion. I have never seen a VFH which was actually swayed either way by "bad voting" (not that I'm suggesting anyone does that) so it's really not a problem. Suggesting that one perspective of humour is "right" and another is "wrong" is clearly bullshit. Some votes are also clearly bullshit. Don't stress it, and get on with having fun on the wiki. The result will come out in the end. MrN 16:59, Jul 17

I'm having fun! I got to use the term "get my goat" earlier. I don't think anything could be better than that. Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 17:02, 17 July 2009 (UTC)

No. I'm not starting a flamewar. (for fuck's sake...) -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 17:13, 17 July 2009 (UTC)

I did notice you didn't change the score, but still - it was out of line. Avoid striking votes on any basis in the future. Thanks. ~ 18:01, 17 July 2009 (UTC)

So you would then have no objection to me striking our the comment that you made in the VFH/Vitiligo as long as I don't adjust the score? right? Pup t 22:11, 19/07/2009

Yeah, cause you're being kinda harsh... MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 22:12, 19 July 2009 (UTC)

OK, let me explain. So far as I can see, there is one basic joke on the page, and the a whole load of facts copied from wikipedia. Usually, if that were the case, the article would not stay around very long, and certainly would never be featured. This time, the joke happens to be the result of some (admittedly) very clever formatting, but ultimately it is just one joke. Make the rest of it funny too and I'll vote for. I stick by what I said. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 22:22, 19 July 2009 (UTC)

Don't get me wrong, I'm not offended or anything. My last comment on this talk page was tongue in cheek. I just thought that since there was this lovely thread already running through here I'd just add in the obvious (to my mind) link between the two of them. I appreciate the feedback, and I agree that it need to have some major work done to it before it's feature worthy. I'm just waiting for it to fall from grace prior to making amendments to it. (Of course that won't stop me from voting to have it featured - what else is art except vanity?) Pup t 23:25, 19/07/2009

Actually I would advise you to vote against. You want your work to be featured when its at its best. I'm embarrassed about my first feature (for example) because its not really good, but I just wanted something featured. just my advice, feel free to ignore. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 23:27, 19 July 2009 (UTC)

It's not going to go through to feature based upon the strength of it at the moment. In fact I'm surprised at the number of for votes it has so far. Besides, you just admitted that I was very clever at formatting, but you have to start somewhere. Pup t 23:32, 19/07/2009

Here's the deal

Fuck off.

I'm perfectly willing to discuss anything you have to say to me, if you think I was wrong and you convince me that I overreacted I am more than willing to apologize and to admit I was wrong. I will not, however, accept "fuck offs". I get enough of that shit on a daily basis from vandals and idiots, I don't need that from one of the more established writers in this place. ~ 10:19, 22 July 2009 (UTC)

Ok, fair enough. But it was meant as an affectionate Irish "fuck off". -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 12:49, 22 July 2009 (UTC)

If I'd hear it as an affectionate Irish fuck off, hopefully accompanied with a pint of Ireland's finest - I wouldn't mind it. You can imagine that it's a bit difficult to differentiate between "fuck offs" when they're in text version :) ~ 12:55, 22 July 2009 (UTC)

You mean like this? -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 13:08, 22 July 2009 (UTC)

Exactly, and now I can respond in kind. ~ 13:13, 22 July 2009 (UTC)

Pog Mahon!

Did you know...

...that Hardwick Fundlebuggy wrote a page about the time he got banned? Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 13:08, 27 July 2009 (UTC)

I might write something today. Or I might just play Final Fantasy all day again... -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 13:16, 27 July 2009 (UTC)

I don't play Final Fantasy, man. I live it! Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 13:22, 27 July 2009 (UTC)

Oh holy fuck. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 13:26, 27 July 2009 (UTC)

No, not really. I live Tron! Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 13:28, 27 July 2009 (UTC)

Award from UN:REQ

This user created Rand McNally, an article originally requested on Uncyclopedia:Requested articles. You're welcome!

This user created Justice League Europe, an article originally requested on Uncyclopedia:Requested articles. You're welcome!

This user created Space Invaders, an article originally requested on Uncyclopedia:Requested articles. You're welcome!

MadMax 17:58, 30 July 2009 (UTC)

Great Gig

I nominated your article after I saw it in Pee. It's fantastic, I must say. Also, between rewriting that off VFD and your work writing requested articles, you've earned yourself a large number of points in my usergroup, or at least you would have if you were a member. Anyway, nice work. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 20:06, 30 July 2009 (UTC)

I joined. Do I still get points? -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 20:07, 30 July 2009 (UTC)

Mmhm, though you'll have to add them/do the "victories" section/add the template to your userpage/do all the logistics stuff yourself, because I'm far too lazy to. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 20:27, 30 July 2009 (UTC)

Haha. So am I. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 20:35, 30 July 2009 (UTC)

The Great Irishman in the sky

Since it's a bit difficult to present it the way it's written on the front page, I did something different. Let me know if you don't like it.

Look's good to me. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 14:59, 31 July 2009 (UTC)

Allrighty. ~ 15:00, 31 July 2009 (UTC)

For what it's worth...

	The article The Great Gig in the Sky has been reviewed by PuppyOnTheRadio(talk)
	Version as at 31 July 2009	PEE review

Various Stuff

First of all, thank you for seeing my article George W. Bush's Hurricane Machine for what it really is (even though I thought the point was extremely obvious). Oddly enough, if my narrator were an equally uneducated, equally ignorant white person, no one would have a problem with it. Funny how double standards like that work.

Secondly, between your The Great Gig in the Sky rewrite and your current article on Tool (which I have yet to read), I can ascertain we have fairly similar tastes in music, which is fairly awesome. I've been wanting to write an article on Porcupine Tree for the longest time, but no one knows who the fuck they are, so doing so is problematic.

Finally, feel free to both add your recent rewrites/writing of requested articles to the "Victories" section of my usergroup, and then award yourself points accordingly.

In summation, rock on.

—Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 02:58, 1 August 2009 (UTC)

Hey! I kind of knew something like that would happen with your Hurricane Machine article. There is a definite liberal bias here, so any satire from a right-wing perspective has to be twice as good (my own political POV is radical left btw).

As for Porucpine Tree, while they're one of my favourite bands ever, I'm not sure what form an article about them would take. For Tool (band) I just kind of satirised myself to an extent, because most people who know of Tool are familiar with some of the pretentious dickheads who like them. That's not really there with PT.

And, yeah, I'll get around to that usergroup crap eventually. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 12:05, 1 August 2009 (UTC)

Yeah, most of life has a liberal bias. I describe myself as an "atheist libertarian that votes Republican" when it comes to my own political beliefs. I also think Barack Obama's a dickface, but that's another matter I won't go in to.

Yeah, Porcupine Tree is friggin' awesome, as is Tool (and Pink Floyd, and Opeth, and Mastodon, and Isis, and The Mars Volta, and about a dozen other bands I won't bother to name at the moment).

Yeah, as for my usergroup-related stuff, do it whenever you get around to it, it's really not that important, though it does save me a great deal of trouble in hunting down and recording other people's contributions, so yeah.

Furthermore--and this is somewhat off-topic--but a while back you started a thread saying how you thought all featured articles should be protected forever, and I just want to say that I agree with you and your position completely, because I feel similarly about people altering my "work." Not that I take myself too seriously, or anything--I try not to--but an article that's good enough to make it to the front page is more-or-less a finished product, and should therefore not be altered, especially by people who haven't a fucking clue what they're doing. Just thought I'd share that.

In summation, continue rocking. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 00:41, 2 August 2009 (UTC)

Father!

As your adopted child, I feel obligated to tell you that Call from Grandma has been nominated over at VFH. I attribute this partially to you because you gave me some good feedback on it...so thank you! —AlbinoZombie 20:21, 4 August 2009 (UTC)

Voted. Don't forget to sign your comments. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 12:48, 4 August 2009 (UTC)

Umm, I'm sorry. I'm really bad at that. —AlbinoZombie 20:21, 4 August 2009 (UTC)

On an unrelated note, I have a new idea for an article, after I've perfected Call from Grandma to a point where I'm satisfied with the article as a whole. I was thinking about the announcers on the swamp adventure rides at amusement parks who make all of the bad nature jokes and I thought of an article that would be something like this..."UnBooks: Swamp Adventure Amusement Park Ride Announcer: An Autobiography" Perhaps it could be exactly like one of those monologues except for in the form of an autobiographical article. First, is that good? Secondly, are there any other ideas I could use in the creation of said article? Thanks. —AlbinoZombie 05:59, 5 August 2009 (UTC)

Yeah, sounds good. It all depends on how it is executed though. On a minor point, you're not supposed to put a space after the "UnBooks:", so your title should be "UnBooks:Swamp Adventure...etc." -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 12:37, 5 August 2009 (UTC)

Thanks!

FROM THE DESK OF GUILDENSTERNENSTEIN

Thank you for supporting my recently featured article

Your support is greatly appreciated.

—Guildensternenstein

---

—Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 22:03, 5 August 2009 (UTC)

Sorry

I'm sorry for those meme topics I created, you were right. They were retarded. But you have to understand I'm past that! So how about we start anew? you are a great editor, I admit, and you do correct things right. So just act friendly, like some of your editing.--Almost Sir Random Crap

Ok, fair enough, we'll call it quits. I would like to see you write something, and move away from the Forum. If you need help with that just come ask me. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 23:56, 6 August 2009 (UTC)

Thanks. I'm planning to make a HowTo, in fact. You should see it when I make it.--Almost Sir Random Crap

Just as long as it's not HowTo:Start A Meme! -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 00:00, 7 August 2009 (UTC)

I lolled. -OptyC Sucks! CUN00:01, 7 Aug

I just made a HowTo. Here it is, fucking ugly and unfinished, HowTo:Have World Domination in a Tight Economy.--Almost Sir Random Crap

Ok, #1, move it to HowTo:Achieve World-Domination in a Recession. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 00:28, 7 August 2009 (UTC)

HowTo:Dominate in a tight recession? Best of both worlds. Pup t 07:46, 7/08/2009

That picture at the top

The one with mohamud and the cock. It's genious.    Orian57    Talk   00:36 7 August 2009

Yup. I'm waiting for the fatwa to be declared. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 00:43, 7 August 2009 (UTC)

Well good luck. I sensicearly hope you get one, and then obviously avoid it for the rest of your life.    Orian57    Talk   12:43 7 August 2009

I'm not Muslim, but according to recent estimates, between 1.25 and 1.84 billion people are. I know it's your user page, but a huge percentage of the human population will find that extremely offensive. And it is possible for some fanatic who uses a computer to track you down online. You're a very funny and creative person, and I admire your talent and success here. Is it really worth taking a risk like that for one pic on your user page? Miley Spears 16:35, 7 August 2009 (UTC)

But I find islam extremely offensive. Besides if Ape is beheaded, then he retains the moral highground.    Orian57    Talk   16:43 7 August 2009

They're supposed to be offended. It is in part a political statement that I am exercising my right to publish offensive cartoons of Muhammed. I hope they track me down, I have a shotgun. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 16:54, 7 August 2009 (UTC)

Don't shoot them! What about the moral highground!    Orian57    Talk   17:01 7 August 2009

Do you mind if I put it on my talkpage as well? I think it's fucking hilarious. -OptyC Sucks! CUN18:00, 8 Aug

Go for it. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 18:03, 8 August 2009 (UTC)

And me. Sorry, I think I might have started soomething.    Orian57    Talk   18:30 8 August 2009

Nobody Cares

I know you were Writer of the Month (congratulations), have worked on many feature articles, and I think you're very funny. But you wrote about what I was doing in the God project, "nobody cares." I don't take things like that very seriously, although it's hard not to when you're told that by someone who's been Writer of the Month and has worked on many featured articles. "Nobody cares" really means "My opinion's valid and you're isn't," or even "everybody knows my opinion's valid and yours isn't." I'm still new here, but not new to wikis. I've been told some very hostile, nasty things, and have gotten used to ignoring them, especially when they come from someone I don't respect. But I and a lot of people here do respect you. Anything you say will probably be magnified many times in the ears of a true n00b. Something to think about. In the mean time, I'm enjoying writing here. You and the other people working on the God article are great! Miley Spears 16:24, 7 August 2009 (UTC)

People respect me? Jesus! More seriously, when I said nobody cares about the Lillith stuff, I didn't mean it like that. I was trying to find a way to make my point in such a way that it would fit in the edit summary. I was also doing my abrasive personality thing that I do... Basically, what I mean is, we're not Wikipedia. We are not interested in facts or truth unless it is funny. In my personal opinion, I think you have ventured too far into the territory of trying to change people's perceptions of the Biblical fairy stories. While the scriptures may or may not refer to a Lillith, that's not the version of the story that people will be able to identify with. Anyway, I appreciate what you are doing, and its good to see someone intelligent who also, for some bizarre reason, wants to edit here. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 16:36, 7 August 2009 (UTC)

Please excuse my n00bness! Your link and a post on my talk page by User:Optimuschris explained it to me. As I posted on my talk page, I'm used to working on the not-funny wiki, and there it's used as a technical term that means "Me and this other user are going to do 200 reverts of each others edits and get half the admins pissed at us and then one or the other of us will get censured or banned." Thanks for helping a n00b! Miley Spears 17:07, 7 August 2009 (UTC)

Ape only got writer of the month because he provided oral to all the admins. I'm still waiting for mine. -OptyC Sucks! CUN16:55, 7 Aug

We're not supposed to talk about our secret deal at the crossroads... -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 16:58, 7 August 2009 (UTC)

I was never told about this. I won WotM fair and square :(    Orian57    Talk   16:59 7 August 2009

Yeah, but you've been giving out free oral since you got here. -OptyC Sucks! CUN17:08, 7 Aug

Image at top of screen

I find this offensive. Why doesn't he have green eyes. I was always told that he had green eyes. (Although I do love the fact that he is kissing a fatwa!) Pup t 01:03, 9/08/2009

Haha. Nice pun. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 01:06, 9 August 2009 (UTC)

Um, ok...

So even though I asked you not to peruse this you do? You just totally ignore me and do it anyway? Man that makes me feel shit. Why are you doing this? Too push me to see how far I will go? Woooo!!!1!!1. Dude, I just gave up trying to help you. MrN 16:50, Aug 12

Dude, if it looks like turning into a Dramathon, I will be the first to say "huff it". But give it a chance. Please? -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 16:53, 12 August 2009 (UTC)

I'm going to put my foot down on this one. This is a bad idea as VFH is already a drama swamp these days. Just let it go. ~ 17:59, 12 August 2009 (UTC)

OK, fine. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 18:11, 12 August 2009 (UTC)

Well actually

"Ach nae, I forgat tae scooor, as the Scots say. "

Well actually "scoor" tend to mean either dioreaha or to clean, ironically. If you wanted to tell people about changing your score I'd recomend the phrase "Ammend thy calculations".    Orian57    Talk   11:46 13 August 2009

Oh yeah. We have that one here too actually. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 14:34, 13 August 2009 (UTC)

You seemed to like the Miley Cyrus thing a lot...

...so would you be interested in working on a translation of this from French to English too? If you don't know French that's fine, I'll start the groundwork and you can give it a dark and depraved finish. What do you think? --El Sid, the lazy one • parlez-vous franglais? 13:28, 15 August 2009 (UTC)

I'll help, but I don't think my French is good enough to do the translation. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 16:30, 15 August 2009 (UTC)

Thanks—the remake

Thank you for supporting! Sir MacMania GUN—[21:21 16 Aug 2009]

USP

I am taking it upon myself to take over The USP today, since it's already late, and it doesn't look like Gerry's getting back for a few days. Any chance you could finish that story from e|m|c today? Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 16:14, 17 August 2009 (UTC)

Yeah, but it'll be late evening. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 17:15, 17 August 2009 (UTC)

That's fine. I'm just happy I don't have to write two articles for it. Just let me know when it's done. Thanks! Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 17:19, 17 August 2009 (UTC)

Good God Almighty

As you made some of the best edits, I thought you'd want to know the God article is up for VFH ---- Binky The WonderSkull 03:55, 20 August 2009 (UTC)

Mastodon

Don't worry, I'm not going to rip your head off for voting Against, or anything, I was just wondering what you meant by "the pitfalls of the band article" (especially since Puppy said I had avoided these very pitfalls), and then--if the article fails on VFH--what I can do to remedy this/make it better. Thanks. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 22:42, 27 August 2009 (UTC)

HowTo:Write A Funny Band Article contains a lot of stuff that might help explain. What I felt essentially is that you were very clearly coming at it from a fan perspective. For example, talking about the awesome solos and stuff. IMHO, you need to dive into the concept of Mastodon being a prehistoric megabeast thing, much like if you were diving into a black hole, searching for crystal. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 22:58, 27 August 2009 (UTC)

A megabeast, you say? Like a big Crusher/Destroyer? With an Iron Tusk? That roams the Siberian Divide? In search of The Czar of a Colony of Birchmen? The finding of which is the Quintessence of...okay, I'll stop. In all seriousness, I see your point--I'll see how the current VFH bid plays out, and then revise accordingly if needed. Thanks. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 00:39, 28 August 2009 (UTC)

I still don't agree. I read through Mastadon and felt that we'd avoided the worst pitfalls, especially after the few changes. Yeah, it reads by someone who is a fan, but then again it doesn't go over the top, which IS the main pitfall in band articles. The twist to the concept with the juxtaposition to the prehistoric beast gives it enough tang to work for me. But again, we'll see how it goes - otherwise we're just putting opinion v opinion, not fact. Pup t 03:40, 28/08/2009

Well of course. My opinion is just my opinion. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 12:11, 28 August 2009 (UTC)

HowTo:Get Nigger-Blood Out Of White Robes‎‎

I am enjoying your article, and am very glad you are making it, as it is a very informative article that really pertains to my daily activities. -- Soldat Teh PWNerator (pwnt!) 17:17, 28 August 2009 (UTC)

On a side note, I just reviewed it for you. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 03:06, September 5, 2009 (UTC)

Your Sig...

...is incredibly confusing. So, what, are you obscure, or nonsensical, or depressed, or posh, or what? Make up your damn mind. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 21:05, September 7, 2009 (UTC)

Its pretty cool isn't it? I use the emaciated steak knife to deport it. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 21:08, September 7, 2009 (UTC)

That's pretty badass, actually. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 01:47, September 8, 2009 (UTC)

Thank you for voting on Number Bases

User:POTR/NumberBases Pup t 22:42, 8/09/2009

hey

You said on Uncyclopedia:VFH/Comparative evaluation of the indirect immunoperoxidase test for the serodiagnosis of rickettsial disease that Comparative evaluation of the indirect immunoperoxidase test for the serodiagnosis of rickettsial disease has the potential to be a lot funnier than it is now. How can it be fixed up to be more funnier? --Docile hippopotamus 09:27, September 9, 2009 (UTC)

The short answer is "more gratuitous sex". The comedy in the article come from the juxtaposition of sort of vulgar sexual language with highbrow scientific language, but you don't exploit it enough. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 12:19, September 9, 2009 (UTC)

Attention Colonizers!

The brief era of peace we've been enjoying has once again been shattered by the IP horde. And since those pot smoking, tree hugging liberal faggots repealed the draft the IC forces are stuck with the likes of you. You are therefore ordered to report to the front lines at once for briefing. Once we have decided our plan of attack, we'll march into battle post haste. You're dismissed An Ape that Only Exists on Thursdays. -OptyC Sucks! CUN20:30, 11 Sep

Thanks!

FROM THE DESK OF GUILDENSTERNENSTEIN

Thank you for supporting my soon-to-be featured article.

Your support is greatly appreciated.

—Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 21:30, September 11, 2009 (UTC)

---

What Has Happened to the Ape-That-Was-Always-Here-But-Is-Not-Now ?

Hey what has happened to the Ape Most Likely To.. ? Have you been recaptured and placed in a secure environment ? --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate). 14:56, November 2, 2009 (UTC)

Okay, you mangy colonists.

I've been commissioned by Mooshy to rerererevitalize IC. I'm to be the glorious leader, etc. because Sissy, Gerry, and Opty have all fucked off. So, I have a few general ideas to start with on what to do. First of all, no fucking infighting. What's said by the authority figures goes. This is Imperial Colonization, not Imperial United States Congress. Second, there should be more of a limit on articles for nomination. Somewhere between 5 and 10. We'll never get to all 17 that are up there if people's votes are so scattered. Third, an active recruiting drive. It fits the name. We're going to draft Satirical Soldiers to deal with the bloody natives at those shit articles on IC. This said, I still want to hear all of your opinions on what to do. Either drop me a line on my talk page, or I'm on IRC damn near all day very weekday. So lets get going, Colonizers! Where the Wild Colins Are - LET THE WILD RUMPUS START! 16:42, November 11, 2009 (UTC)

I don't understand.

How are the terrorists winning? Pup

Cos the terrorists use the threat of violence to try and stop us from showing cartoons like that. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 14:03, November 14, 2009 (UTC)

But what's the point of insulting their prophet when millions of other non-violent non-extremist Muslims also consider Muhammad to be their prophet? —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 17:28, 14 November 2009

To show that we still can. In my opinion freedome of speech is the most important thing in any civilised society, we should have the right to be as crass as we like about religious figure heads, after all how horrible have they been/are they about athiests? Gay people? how horrible have they been for centuries? Ape hasn't murdered anybody by putting up this picture, he hasn't surpressed any one, he isn't doing anything to them.    Orian57    Talk   18:05 14 November 2009

My issue with that image isn't the crassness of it, but the fact that it's directed at a very minor minority of Muslims, while millions of people who have nothing to do with terrorism also find it very offensive. You're free to insult as many religious figure heads as you want for as much as I'm concerned, but you should be aware that you'd be insulting a whole religion, not just the extremist faction. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 18:54, 14 November 2009

That might become relevant when millions of people start looking at Ape's user page or my talkpage and complaining to Wiki. At which point it'll be pointed out to them that the picture is no longer hosted on Wiki. So, like it or hate it, there's no point in debating it anymore because there's nothing to be done about it. And I insult whole religions on a daily basis. If I thought Christians would overreact in a hysterical way I'd have a picture of Jesus sucking cock. Now why don't you all shut the fuck up and go write an article or something. -OptyC Sucks! CUN19:10, 14 Nov

But don't you agree that would be as immature as this picture uploaded by a vandal showing Edward Cullen sucking a cock? (Well, not anymore since it's been deleted.) —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 19:19, 14 November 2009

Sure. So? Never claimed it was mature or high brow. And everyone seems to have forgotten that the one article the pic appeared in, its use was actually FUNNY. Everyone is focusing on my and Ape's pages when the justification for the picture was elsewhere. -OptyC Sucks! CUN19:23, 14 Nov

Because we insult the beliefs of literally every other group except for the ones who happen to riot and murder people when they're offended. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 18:50, November 14, 2009 (UTC)

Btw, showing Mohammed sucking a cock is not the same as showing a random celebrity sucking a cock for two reasons:

1. The taboo in Islam about showing any image of Mohammed, and
2. The taboo in Islam against homosexuality.

Just in case you don't understand humour...-- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 03:51, November 16, 2009 (UTC)

I love you man

You're my hero. -OptyC Sucks! CUN15:50, 14 Nov

Seconded. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 20:21, November 19, 2009 (UTC)

Hey faggit.

I haven't seen you on the IRCs in a while. Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn! 02:16, November 21, 2009 (UTC)

I've been busy with college. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 16:55, November 21, 2009 (UTC)

Higher education is no excuse. Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn! 19:37, November 21, 2009 (UTC)

You're alive!

How ya been? -OptyC Sucks! CUN18:53, 14 Jan

Pretty good. I'm in the middle of exams at the moment, which explains why I'm making pictures for Uncyclopedia... -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 18:55, January 14, 2010 (UTC)

LOL. I like that idea btw. You should share the details of the fonts and whatnot you used to create the magazine title so I can make a couple. -OptyC Sucks! CUN18:57, 14 Jan

The terrorists are coming for you

Again. I figure since it's your article, you should be the one to make the ultimate decision. -OptyC Sucks! CUN22:50, 21 Jan

I have to admit I'm a little disappoointed you decided to go with some gay cartoon, but it's your article. The bastards have claimed another victory today.  :( -OptyC Sucks! CUN17:35, 22 Jan

There was no way of winning that one. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 10:55, January 23, 2010 (UTC)

I disagree my friend. The Miley Cyrus pic was an agreeable compromise. The cartoon is just stupid. -OptyC Sucks! CUN14:12, 23 Jan

Yeah, you're probably right. I've changed it. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 15:15, January 23, 2010 (UTC)

There is a difference

Between you being censored and me protecting a child who can't protect herself. MrN 01:35, Jan 22

I was being sarcastic. I had a feeling I'd run into trouble over the image... -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 01:37, January 22, 2010 (UTC)

Did you really think that was fair to that kid? Dude. Anyway, it's all good now... I just don't like being accused of censorship. MrN 01:40, Jan 22

Didn't really consider it to be honest, I just thought the picture was funny with that caption. -- smug Ape (dehydrate) (Riot Porn) 01:45, January 22, 2010 (UTC)

It was. The original image was by far the most funny out of all of those suggested. Shame it was treating an innocent child who can't defend herself as a sexual object eh? Maybe you might think about that... MrN 01:54, Jan 22