Main Page

the content-free encyclopedia that anyone can edit.
37,721 articles in English

From today's featured article [Feature an article]

Your Quaint, Middle-Class Home - Dude, I hate having to be the one to tell you this, but your entire family was killed. I didn't know how to tell you, so I wrote an article on a humor wiki about it. What a shame that I didn't have the courage to tell you face to face, but I hope you find this Uncyclopedia article before you get home, otherwise, things could get a little awkward. Before you get all emotional, let me tell you how it happened, and why you shouldn't press charges. Listen to me, okay? Stop crying like a girl and let me talk.

Everything has to come to an end sometime. Remember when I accidentally killed your gopher? Well, this is sorta like that, except that, instead of a gopher, it was your entire family.

Oh man, I am so, so sorry. See? Don't you feel better now that I apologized?

I hope you weren't too attached to them. They were, according to local sources, being whiny little bitches before they were executed. It's not your fault; your long family history of playing the victim is likely genetic. What could you possibly do? Don't you worry though; I'm still here to help you through this. (Full article...)

Recently featured:

Archive · Vote for featured articles · Purge

Did you know... [edit]

... that John Travolta (Pictured) isn't gay?

... that Bruce Lee could juggle two balls with his penis?
... that the White House is really off-white?
... that the only thing money can't buy is poverty?
... that you have schizophrenia and we're talking about you right now?
... that the universe is made up of protons, electrons, neutrons and morons?
... that the light at the end of the tunnel is commonly reported to be a strobe light accented with techno?
... that the Russian Reversal is the common English term for the phenomenon during which a person descended from Russia is spontaneously turned around?

Archive · Suggest new entries

In the news [edit]

Donald Trump is the first convicted President of the United States

Canadian NHL team once again blows chance to win Stanley Cup. In other news, water is wet.
The Kremlin: Vladimir Putin "totally didn't participate in a Pride parade, nothing to see here.."
Donald Trump found GUILTY ON ALL CHARGES (Pictured), soon to debut "prison orange" business suit
Antarctica becomes embroiled in upside-down flag controversy
Michael Jackson comes back to life
Justin Bieber gives birth to a baby, baby, baby, oooh
Switzerland wins Eurovision
- Netherlands disqualified in final shocker
YouTube is dead
D.C. stink-bombed by Jihadists and Nazis
Colombia Protests Exclusion from Eurovision; Britney Joins in Support
Ship captain who wrecked Baltimore bridge defeated by Upstate New York bridge
NFL imposes speed limit and bans trick plays
Forecast calls for a leapin' Lousy Smarch weather
Larry David gets Hinkled by Anti-Israel Protesters
Taylor Swift's favorite NFL team wins rigged Super Bowl, big whoop
Elon Musk plants brain chip into first human guinea pig

Ongoing: Russian Invasion · Drake-Kendrick Lamar feud · Israel-Hamas conflict
Recent deaths: Richard M. Sherman (Disney songwriter) · Doug Ingle · Bill Walton · The NBA logo guy · Willie Mays ·Donald Sutherland
Upcoming deaths: Jimmy Carter · Vladimir Putin · Richard Simmons · Kate Middleton · Market demand for Tesla cars · Drake's sanity

Who the fuck knows?: Noam Chomsky

UnNews Main · Archive

On this day [edit]

June 27: Atheists Using Mithraism as an Argument Against the Existence of a Historical Jesus Day

476 - Odoacer sacks Rome in response to not being invited to the Senate's toga party.
1617 - The Hapsburg Dynasty is created after the 1st Dynasty Warriors set in feudal Austria.
1992 - Fedor Emelianenko defeats Terrorism at a twenty minute decision in PRIDE.
1974 - U.S. President Richard Nixon visits the Soviet Union, is inspired by the Potemkin village to invent the State of Massachusetts.
1976 - The Farrah flip-falls out of style in most Middle Eastern countries, except strangely in Oman.
1980 - Freddie Mercury finally gets to ride his bicycle.
2004 - Krispy Kreme invents the first Glazed atom bomb, but fat hungry people lick all the glaze off.

Archive · View today · View tomorrow

Picture of the day

A screenshot from Age of Umpires II: Age of Cricket. In this example, we see the classic "Shotgun-Seven" formation being used to maximum effect. Any good Umpire would note that this places a good deal of emphasis on the left side, making it easy enough to sneak in the stray foul wicket.

Image credit: Hindleyite
View image · Nominate new image · View all featured images

Other areas of Uncyclopedia

How to be funny and not just stupid – for help with that comedy thing
Policies and guidelines – for the boring rules no one follows
Formatting – for help on editing
Requested articles – for inspiration, or lack thereof
Village Dump – to throw angry invectives at other users
Community portal – for general community shenanigans

Sister projects

Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects as well as some foreign language Uncyclopedias and Illogicopedia.

UnNews
News on crack
Uncyclopedia
The content-free encyclopedia
Undictionary
Best left unsaid
UnTunes
Noisy things
UnGames
Ways to waste away
HowTo
Like Ikea without the pictures
UnBooks
Content-free books
Unquotable
Useless misquotes
Uncycloversity
No student loans
UnPoetia
Dreams deferred
UnDebate
Debate the irrelevant
UnScripts
We ruin stage too
Why?
Because
UnReviews
Hack frauds
UnVoyage
Armchair travel
Uncyclomedia
The Foundation

Uncyclopedia languages

This Uncyclopedia is written in English, supposedly. Started in 2005, it currently contains 37,721 articles. Many other parody wikis are available; some of the lamest are listed below.