Blackbird

The blackbird (Turdus merula) is a small avian model of robot used mainly for purposes of espionage. It was manufactured in Thailand in the mid 1960s for the Russian embassy, which hoped to distribute them throughout Western Europe and the Middle East. The eyes of a blackbird are in fact miniature cameras which relay information to bunkers hidden deep beneath the Earth's outer layer of petrol stations.

These signals consist of a rapid series of fluty notes, with phrases lasting around two seconds with 5 second pauses in between.

These signals sound like no more than innocent twittering to our ears, but to the trained hearing of Soviet "Ave-Crackers" and sophisticated computer technology, the "song" can be decoded to reveal the positions of nearby security vehicles, the prime minister of the given country, weapons, and baguettes.

Occasionally, one might come across a Blackbird whose batteries have run out. A quick check on the sole of the left foot will reveal its serial number and the date it was manufactured on. Unscrewing the head will allow one to gain access to the recording tapes and mechanisms in the robot's belly. Be careful not to let the tape run to the end, as the bird is packed full of explosives which cause it to self destruct if dismantled for too long. The blast was once likened by naturalist Robert Frost to "a ten mega-ton explosion emanating from a small dead bird."

Blackbirds in history

• Evidence from nursery rhymes suggests that one of the earliest uses of blackbirds was for purposes of a coup d'etat against a currently anonymous Medieval king.
• Recently Paul McCartney has written a song about blackbirds. It was believed that he was under watch of one at all times up until his death.
• Jim Crow was a crow which is a black bird that is very similar to a blackbird.
• Ravens are also black birds similar to blackbirds, and we all know how important they have been to history.

Black Birds in War

Black Birds were used during the World war 3 as spies for the German Empire to find out what Yogi Bear was doing with their picnic baskets. Well apparentally he was using the picnic baskets to destroy Yogi Bear. Germany was later seen at the malt shop