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A Civil War is a form of warfare known for its kindness and civility, in stark contrast to the other tactics such as scorched earth which are entirely too dirty for upstanding gentlemen. Civil warfare is a strategy that has outlasted many minor fads in warfare such as Germany's Blitzkrieg Bop, the British Redcoat's Stand In a Line and Shoot or the French Foreign Legion's Surrender. Its longevity as a tactic can probably be attributed to a few things, namely the incompetence of modern military tacticians compared to those of the past and the universal human need for cordial smiles and small talk, even during battle.
Civil wars are defined by a few chief characteristics. The Blitzkrieg Bop, for instance, was famous for its angular guitar rhythms and use of armor and dive-bombers to spearhead a motorized assault straight through the heart of an opposing force. Civil War, however, is based on these precepts: (Full article...)
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| *... that applause was invented to mock the deaf?
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| Jewish people raped these people
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"I liked Winter Soldier."
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October 21: William Shatner Appreciation Day
- 1017 BC - Plato invents a wicked new toy, but squirrels it away for centuries. Not until the New King James translation of his world famous book The Republic is it rediscovered.
- Nought-686 AD - Conan of Cimmeria becomes Pope, is contracted to star in Conan the Destroyer.
- 1020 - Some German honkies were enjoyinng a very nice section of the Black Forest until some Romans come sack their village. Today is the day they payed those Degos back with interest.
- 16-nought-Nine AD - Ninja Turtle Raphael starts beautifying some buildings in Rome. He will one day paint the perfect pizza.
- 1740 - Worldwide squirrel defenestration conspiracy forms.
- 18-nought-Five AD - Battle of Trafalgar. French/Spanish/Dutch PWND by Nelson.
- 1989 - The gateway to Hell opened up for the eleventh time since Britney Spears got out, but it was only to let Mr. Flufferkins go tinkle. Mr. Rogers' neighborhood never recovered.
- 1992 - Rachael Ray's chicken gains intelligent life
- 1997 - Frogger crossed the road for the very first time
- 1998 - The $5 bill was invented
- 2007 - Buster Keaton is slowly forgotten once again.
- 2008 - Klingon made the official language of the United States.
- 2009 - You read this.
- 2015 - Marty McFly and Dr. Emmett Brown arrive to Hill Valley from the year 1985.
- 2024 - A fly travels to Nova Scotia to drink some sodas.
- 1986 - KHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!
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