User talk:Manticore/Archive 3

Wrong room...

RAPE!!!

you saw nothing... Have Fun!MuCal. Orian57Talk!Read!PEE!UnProvise!CMC! 00:41 11 June 2008

Pic!

C'mon, what kind of whore are you supposed to be without shamelessly putting your likeness on display here? You know you want to... --SirU.U.Esq. VFH | GUN | Natter | Uh oh | Pee 12:26, Jun 12

Ta... --SirU.U.Esq. VFH | GUN | Natter | Uh oh | Pee 13:11, Jun 12

No problem. Killed off some time I could've used for exam revision. Win-Win I say. — Sir Manticore 13:13, 12 June 2008 (UTC)

UnSignpost: June 12th, 2008

The Uncyclopedia UnSignpost

May contain traces of humor!

June 12th, 2008 • Issue 7

Cajek banned - New, shittier writer assigned to this stupid job by Qua Recently Cajek, an Uncyclopedia user who has been labelled as a mystical creature, was been given a one month ban by the council of Wikia. Users who feared that UnSignpost would not be written or delivered. But don't worry, Qua (Uncyclopedia's shittiest n00b) and half of YTTE have taken over UnSignpost, well...until Cajek gets unbanned. Qua, who is currently in a state of shock, said that "Cajek was a good guy, I didn't expect him to get banned for a month. He was about to help me, I don't know what he was going to help me with but he was going to help me with something.". Many Uncyclopedians that are known have a hold a grudge against Cajek celebrated his recent ban saying "While he might be back in only a month, we should take the time to celebrate and rejoice a Cajek-free environment." Flumpa "taking toys and going home". by lots of different people It has been reported that Flumpa, Uncyclopedia's very own pimply faced ginger-nut has left Uncyclopedia forever, due to irreconcilable differences. He cites the banning of users, fights between the two, the treatment of IP's as "real people" and the lack of cookies in mommas cookie jar. One of our reporters spoke to Flumpa as he was packing his wagon to leave Uncyclopedia "I like the holding hands and the fairy floss but Sophia has icky wiki germs and I just couldn't get past that. However I hear this new EDwina down the street is available, she may play in mud but I hear she has yummy yummy cookies." 127.0.0.1, leader of the "IPs are Real People, Too" Foundation had said that "Flumpa makes some great points on IP treatment, such as telling them that behind that string of random numbers lies an actual person; A person with heart. A person with brain. A person with spleen." When asked whether he would share his hard earned money on a badge from the Keep-the-IP's-out-of-Bannation-Foundation, this reporter simply told them to bugger off and get their own alcohol addiction gawdammit! We do, however, wish Flumpa the best of luck as he travels across the wiki-street with his trademarked brand of Off-topic forums to meet this EDwina fellow. Internet safety month has begun. By Dr. Skullthumper We at the UnSignpost would like to remind all Uncyclopedian editors that June is Internet safety month. Through the efforts of Uncyclopedia and other sites across the Internet, we can help protect innocent children and frail grandmothers from seeing offensive content KAFFIR Uhm, we're sorry about that. The editor that wrote that previous sentence has been fired, in accordance with the rules of Internet safety month. UnSignpost would like to remind all editors to use extra padding in tables, because we don't want the little kiddies touching the sharp edges and getting hurt. As per Internet safety month, all uploaded porn will be closely monitored to see if the models are engaging in safe fucking. I mean sex. SEX! I meant SEX! We apologize for the previous two editors. They have been shot, out in the hallway, in the most safe method possible, we assure you. We even laid out cushions for them to fall on. Anyway, Websense and other Internet blocking sites will up its sensors to block over 99.99% of the Internet. What will remain is available is the Wikipedia article "Frog", weather.com, and anything unblocked in China. We at UnSignpost wish you a happy Internet safety month, and hope that you stay safe. Remember to always use a firewall. This column has been blocked by Websense. Websense has blocked this column for the following reason: This column contains "humor". Finals approach for student-Uncyclopedians, procrastination triples By TheLedBalloon Aww, kitty! Isn't he cute? Difficult times lie ahead for schoolbound Uncyclopedians. A series of semi-challenging tests lie in the near future for many, and everyone's workload seems to be growing. Unfortunately for Uncyclopedians, finals are nearly here. However, luckily for Uncyclopedia, finals are almost here! This means that, as procrastination rates skyrocket, Uncyclopedia activity grows proportionally. Haven't been studying for your math final? Those fancy words mean that Uncyclopedia usage is going up, just as teachers pull out their hair worrying about keeping their kids' averages above the department bottom line so they can keep their jobs. However, here at UnSignpost and Uncyclopedia, we pride ourselves on allowing for multi-tasking. So, here is a series of brief study guides that are pretty much all you need: Science: For this final, you will be asked questions about science. However, simply remember a few facts, and your science final will be a breeze. These include remembering that ontogeny does not recapitulate phylogeny, pyruvate and phosphofruktokinase function as glycolytic enzymes, and the kidneys are located three ribs up from the malnuric sphincter. Math: Just prove to your teacher that 1=2, and any answer you give is automatically right. English: ENGLISH, MOFO, DO YOU SPEAK IT? History: To pass this, just try to remember a few important dates: 622BC, 394BC, 211BC, 5BC, 11AD, 24AD, 300AD, 906AD, 1102AD, 1619AD, 1791AD, 1963AD, and 2012AD. Tech. Ed.: Basically, you take a saw and cut shit up. Fucking A. Music class: Try not to fail and blow any notes. You'd sure look like a real tool, then, huh. Art: Just explain to your teacher how deep and misunderstood you are, and paint your feelings. Take a few pictures with a black and white camera setting and write a few "dark" poems, and if your teacher knows how often you cry then you'll have an easy A. Foreign language: THIS IS AMERICA, SPEAK AMERICAN! Gym: If you're really planning on studying for this final, then only God can help you now. NONSENSE CATASTOPHE by Cajek An article by Zombiebaron has caused a huge feud between the all-powerful admins that could ban me again. Thekillerfroggy has charged that the "Nonsense Watermelon Catastrophe" was not newsworthy enough, while Zombiebaron charges that the article is newsworthy, and therefore should not be deleted. In the fight, many people have cried "drama" and run for their lives. "Oh, this is deliiiicious!" said resident fucktard Drama. We spoke to Drama in his white linoleum mansion. He stopped seductively petting his gay snow leopard long enough to talk to us. "I loooove drama. I want their drama dripping all over my linoleum castle. I want their orgasmic screams of anger to rattle the walls! What do you think, Puffles?" "Oohh, puurrrrr" said Puffles. Some of the more regular users have claimed that the drama will bring unwanted side effects. RAHB has recently said to one of our reporters: "Remember, when there's drama, Ljlego touches himself." [Ed note: he said that on IRC, I swear. to. god. ban: banbanban.] Zombiebaron, an administrator who just happens to be a spectre of the unwept dead, spoke at his crypt this Tuesday dressed in his ceremonial black and red robes: "Hhhgggrrrr, I do not like speaking to the public: They give me a rash. As far as how random uncyclopedia is, we have two admins who are a balloon and a frog, so my article is perfect. The drama will not be settled until I taste the frog's flesh. Suffffeeeerrrrrr..." The Killer Froggy issued a statement soon after, with his frog army in the background: "ribbit? RIBBIT! ribbit. ribbit ribbit ribbit!" Both administrators have promised to ban the poor, misunderstood writer of this article if their statements were printed, but that's the risk we take to bring you the news. That's just how cool we are. Drama is the real winner here. As of this printing, he is planning to buy his gay snow leopard a fluffy red cape with the profits. And remember: every time there's drama, Ljlego touches himself. I'm not fucking kidding. He's all like, "oh yeah, oh, oh yeah I love you drama" and they're both in the love coven, snugglin' n' shit. I have pictures, guys! I swear it's totally ins AS OF THIS PARAGRAPH, CAJEK HAS BEEN BANNED INDEFINITELY.

Check out these pages! How dare you! Google is the new 42 Join Scientology Or Else! Wikis different from our own PWN'D! From our logs: 09:42, 5 June 2008 Sannse (Talk | contribs) blocked Cajek (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 1 month ‎ (Bringing Uncyclopedia in to disrepute (or even further into? whatever.)) 15:33, 5 June 2008 Mhaille (Talk | contribs) blocked Cajek (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 2 days ‎ (time served already.....reduced sentence) 13:42, 4 June 2008, TheLedBalloon (Talk | contribs) blocked 221.154.246.169 (Talk) with an expiry time of infinite (Sorry, you're too dumb to edit this wiki. You can come back when you grow a brain.) 12:35, 4 June 2008 TheLedBalloon (Talk | contribs) blocked Modusoperandi (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 47 seconds ‎ (ZOMG LINKIN' SHOCK BANBANBANBANBAN) 03:55, June 10, 2008 Mordillo (Talk | contribs) blocked 122.2.113.102 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 week ‎ (TAGLOG MOTHERFUCKER! DO YOU SPEAK TAGLOG?!) 20:07, June 10, 2008 Zombiebaron (Talk | contribs) blocked Cajek (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 5 minutes ‎ (Are you ban hunting or something?) 05:56, June 11, 2008 Codeine (Talk | contribs) blocked 82.0.83.149 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 month ‎ (You fail at funny. Read HTBFANJS. Slowly. Then copy it out 100 times in longhand and maybe, *maybe* I'll let you edit here again.)) Biopic of the Week 127.0.0.1 ~ Quite possibly the greatest IP that has ever lived. He is literally everywhere at once. He is in your computer, destroying it bit by bit. He is in your living room, eating your Flamin' Hot Cheetos. He is in your bedroom possibly getting laid. He is in every room you could possibly think of. All Hail 127.0.0.1!!! Foreign Uncyc Page of the Week: Japanese Euroipods and the Crappy Translation UU's obscure British Dialect expression of the week: "Can-in-the-pan" ~ Showcasing the unerring ability of the British to come up with expressions that bear no connection whatsoever to the item or act they're describing, this is used by the Cornish to refer to a somersault. A small template glorious prize is on offer to the person who comes up with the best suggestion as to why. Answers on a postcard to UU's talk page. Page Quote of the Week: Oswald's guilt was assured when he was witnessed running the 397 yards from the Book Depository Building and began teabagging the President Warren Commission Best New Article of the Week: That Guy Standing Behind You with the Freakin' Huge Chainsaw, no words can sum up how incredibly good this article is. It tells this story about a guy who wasn't cared for who started chopping things up with a chainsaw. Sure some critics are skeptical but we at the UnSignpost think this is the best new article yet. Well until it gets deleted of course. Article of the week: That one written by Cajek all the way at the bottom was pretty damn good. I love articles that have references to sex in 'em. I don't have much to do in this trailer, and when I see a reference to sex it's like my pants fly. off. It's okay, the cats don't understand what's going on. Well, the dogs and the chimp may understand but they're not complainin'. Nope, reading Uncyclopedia articles gets me too hot to care about social constraints.

UnSignpost Main Page • Contact the Editors • Sign Up for Delivery • Get the Userbox

THEDUDEBOT Armed and Ready Say The Word 17:00, 12 June 2008 (UTC)

Weasel Stomping Day

why, why why? – Preceding unsigned comment added by 24.62.226.101 (talk • contribs)

Someone thought it was worthy of a quick and painless death. I agreed with them. — Sir Manticore 13:20, 17 June 2008 (UTC)

UnSignpost: June 19th, 2008

The Uncyclopedia UnSignpost

The Newspaper With No Ambitions, Goals, Hopes or Dreams!

June 19whenever-th, 2008 • Issue 8

UnSignpost abandoned by creators! by UU Uncyclopedia's popular newspaper/tacky tabloid rag (delete according to preference) the UnSignpost - already floundering following the loss of founding editor Dr. Skullthumper - has been dealt another, possibly fatal blow, with the news that popular feature-machine and international diplomat Cajek has not been arsed to edit the latest issue. When thursday June 19th dawned without the by-now-traditional UnSignpost dropping onto their talkpages, Unycylopedians everywhere could be heard bravely dealing with the incident by pretending they hadn't noticed. We asked prominent Uncyc contributors for their reactions to the journalistic crisis facing their favourite wiki-based news delivery system. "SCREAM FOR ME BOSTON.... SCREAM FOR ME BOSTON!" said Don Leddy, obviously coping badly with the news. Sensing a possible catastrophe, DJ Irreverent bravely leaped into the breach and created a forum topic that galvanised the community, while UU declared himself too busy to help, then promptly wrote about half of the paper. While still suffering from writer's block, which explains the total lack of lulz and inspiration thus far. It's probably about time to link to nobody cares and close this story now, isn't it? Industrial mogul joins Uncyclopedia, promises great wealth to all. by DJ Irreverent UU Donald Trump, the man, the legend, the Tower, the hairstyle, has taken time out of his busy international schedule to create a forum topic promising affluence beyond the dreams of avarice to all on Uncyclopedia! Despite the impeccable credentials displayed on his userpage, so far only Qua and SysRq managed to take advantage of the popular billionaire's altruism before he was ruthlessly banned by noted anti-capitalist Codeine. UnSignpost was particularly impressed with Codeine's ability to resist the temptation to use "you're fired" as a block reason, as we are sure it would have been all but overwhelming. It is to be hoped that, on his return from bannination, Mr Trump will use his undoubted wealth and business connections to help Uncyc beat the ever-encroaching threat of Wikia's advertising plans. N00b ties knot by UU Popular recent NotM winner Cheapinitreal has further embarrassed the Uncyclopedia community by becoming all respectable and getting married. Confessing to his transgression, Cheap added "all and all, it was a right fine week". The UnSignpost would like to write something really funny here, then wish Cheap all the best, but this issue is being rushed out as it's, like, way late, so we just don't have time. UnSignpost resorts to blatant filler by UU In a move heralded as "an exciting development in journalism" by guest editor UU, the UnSignpost today employed blatant flannel to fill an annoying white gap at the bottom of the page. It is believed that this is the first such instance of using blatant rubbish to fill a newspaper page in journalistic history. "I'm proud to be at the vanguard of such a groundbreaking technique" said UU, before going off to scour Cajek's ideas page in a desperate hunt for inspiration. "Is this long enough yet?" he added, before concluding "not quite, another few words or so should do the trick".

Check out these pages! If people are gonna do it, might as well keep 'em off the streets Tuber tales The Cult of QVFD spreads! Don't think there's enough to vote for? Fag to the rescue! From our logs: 13:12, 17 June 2008 Mordillo (Talk | contribs) blocked 92.43.66.7 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 week ‎ (You will be better appreciated at that cheap whorehouse down the road. Take the third left) 21:59, 17 June 2008 Hinoa (Talk | contribs) blocked 74.38.121.240 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 week ‎ (UN:VAIN: It's what's for [INSERT GENERIC MEAL HERE]) 09:07, 17 June 2008 Mordillo (Talk | contribs) blocked 220.128.148.178 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 week ‎ (Budha says: Blanking shall not lead you to enlightment. Write funny articles, my friend, and be happy) 04:59, 16 June 2008 Zombiebaron (Talk | contribs) blocked 58.107.246.135 (Talk) with an expiry time of 2 day ‎ (No no. When was that last time YOU had a really big solid shit?) 01:35, 15 June 2008 TheLedBalloon (Talk | contribs) blocked 24.2.209.140 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 week ‎ (You know, you're probably the dumbest person I've ever seen. That's saying a lot, you know. You should be proud.) 17:57, 13 June 2008 Manticore (Talk | contribs) blocked 84.168.60.159 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 month ‎ (Banning Italy, one IP at a time.) Biopic of the Week Zombiebaron ~ Zombiebaron? Zombiebaron, zombiebaron zombiebaron zombiebaron. Strong Zombiebaron. Text-based Zombiebaron. Also, Zombiebaron. Finally, Zombiebaron. Foreign Uncyc Page of the Week: Japanese Bubble Wrap and the Crappy Translation UU's obscure British Dialect expression of the week: "I wanna new wicker wacker" ~ Discerning Uncyclopedians finding themselves in the heart of Liverpool, but worryingly badly dressed, should fret no more - this handy phrase allows them to ask "can I have a new suit please sir?" like a native. It's anyone's guess as to what they'll end up clad in though. MrN UU's delete reason of the week: The_possible_lovechild_of_Mark_Twain_and_Oscar_Wilde ~ Delete - Holy crap, I've actually read this at least twice. I can't understand why it never occured to me to put it on VFD --Kip the Dip

UnSignpost Main Page • Contact the Editors • Sign Up for Delivery • Get the Userbox

THEDUDEBOT Armed and Ready Say The Word 01:05, 21 June 2008 (UTC)

You know MantiBot

He needs a bot flag pronto! --¿Qua? es mi página de discusión, es lo que mi contribuiría 04:36, 23 June 2008 (UTC)

Hmm, I should chase that up sometime. — Sir Manticore 05:28, 23 June 2008 (UTC)

nope. gained sentience. doesn't need it.   Le Cejak • <5:37, 23 Jun 2008>

Now that you mention it, I don't recall pressing any buttons recently. — Sir Manticore 05:41, 23 June 2008 (UTC)

beep bop boop?   Le Cejak • <5:47, 23 Jun 2008>

AHHH!!!!

Who let the whores out? ~ 08:21, 23 June 2008 (UTC)

Was it the Jews? — Sir Manticore 08:29, 23 June 2008 (UTC)

Who let you build a bot?! One Manti is more than enough. ~ 08:30, 23 June 2008 (UTC)

Lies. You can never have enough whores. — Sir Manticore 08:38, 23 June 2008 (UTC)

Hey! Hey you! Yeah, that's right, you there! You need a bot flag. You know what'd be totally sweet? A bot flag. Totally sweet. - Don Leddy the Crunch (Nyah, see, nyah!) 11:21, Jun 23

Maybe we could get world hunger a bot flag too? — Sir Manticore 12:51, 23 June 2008 (UTC)

Does an Aussi bot flag should be upside down? ~ 12:55, 23 June 2008 (UTC)

I don't get it. — Sir Manticore 13:00, 23 June 2008 (UTC)

User renaming

Where do I go to rename my account?? AP aka --Sunstar Net 22:56, 25 June 2008 (UTC)

I HAVE COME TO PROTEST MY BLOCK IN ALL CAPS

...oh wait... – Sir Skullthumper, MD (criticize • writings • critchat) 05:26 Jun 26, 2008

BANBANBAN — Sir Manticore 01:19, 27 June 2008 (UTC)

Rollback whoring

Well hi there Manticore, hope life is treating you well and so forth. I'm trying to go about that whole "get the approval of several admins" thing required for rollback, but can't really get on IRC without the office thought police jumping on my PC in their lead-lined fun crushing boots, so I'm taking the talk page route. I may have voluntarily dropped out of the VFS running, but I still want to do helpful stuffs! I've already secured powerful Jewish backing, and chemical assistance, and I've a request pending with the Massachusets Mafioso, so I was wondering if I could secure Antipodean approval before asking Codeine to make the appropriate 'crat adjustment? --UU - natter 11:57, Jun 26

The Australian Scientific Community strongly supports this move. — Sir Manticore 01:18, 27 June 2008 (UTC)

This Is A Message

Because you asked for a message. Enjoy! -RAHB 01:35, 27 June 2008 (UTC)

I'm so turned on right now. — Sir Manticore 01:36, 27 June 2008 (UTC)

This Is A Sentence. This Is A Link This Is Where The Timestamp Would Go.

Oh yeah. Wiki-sex. /me puts his "rewrite template" in Manticore's "discussion tab." Oh, I'm a dirty boy, better put a VFD tag on me. (in conclusion, FU Cajek and your edit conflict) -RAHB 01:40, 27 June 2008 (UTC)

MORE! — Sir Manticore 01:40, 27 June 2008 (UTC)

I'm too exhausted from all the hawt s3x. You try this time Cajek. -RAHB 01:42, 27 June 2008 (UTC)

Dude, I heard there was a party on this talk page. Is this true??? - P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon (Tick Tock) (Contribs) 01:42, Jun 27

Come on in baby. — Sir Manticore 01:45, 27 June 2008 (UTC)

Did any of you guys ever notice that blue is the prevalent color on Manticore's talk page? (way to fuck it up Led) -RAHB 01:46, 27 June 2008 (UTC)

What a fucking jerk. Who's ever seen a grey balloon anyway? — Sir Manticore 01:48, 27 June 2008 (UTC)

Sounds like a pretty gay balloon to me. -RAHB 01:52, 27 June 2008 (UTC)

Yeah, and if that wasn't enough evidence, check out this:

<TheLedBalloon> UK is ahead of me, Aussies are behind

What are my countrymen doing behind him, I wonder. — Sir Manticore 01:54, 27 June 2008 (UTC)

Well, you seemed to be enjoying it well enough... - P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon (Tick Tock) (Contribs) 01:57, Jun 27

Blue is the new "blue". MrN 01:58, Jun 27

Guys I need to do a poo. I'll be back soon. <3 — Sir Manticore 01:59, 27 June 2008 (UTC)

Save some for us! -RAHB 02:00, 27 June 2008 (UTC)

UnSignpost: June 26nd, 2008

The Uncyclopedia UnSignpost

Reading This Is The Mysterious Second Step To Getting Profit From Stealing Childrens' Underwear!

June 26th, 2008 • Issue 9

Uncyclopedia running out of Interesting Stuff. UnSignpost in Jeopardy! By Qua Recently. Uncyclopedia, in its maternal state. Is running out of interesting stuff as most users keep filling her with the same old stuff day after day. Most if not almost all of the staff at the UnSignpost panicked as this meant that their newspaper, which faced the threat of disabondement yesterday. Could be folded by the Uncyclopedia Cabal (there is no cabal) itself. Cajek, the UnSignpost's co-founder, commented on the shortage of interesting stuff saying "...". Mostly this is a time of crisis for the UnSignpost which has been falling into a state of crisis for a while now. and we need you to help. All you have to do is send money to the UnSignpost offices. And please, refer freinds to do the same please! We need it more then you. Penis Man returns! By THEDUDEMAN At exactly 12:29 AM Monday morning, some local idiot decided that it would be a great day to stir up drama and piss people off with some long forgotten shit. And with that, Penis Man made his way back to our great Uncyclopedia with the intent of vandalizing Boomer's userpage. Soon after, the Town drunk Eugene Kay decided to follow suit by uploading the same image by the name of Zombiepenis. Why he decided to make such an apparent strike at the admin who has beat him so much is currently unknown. We at UnSignpost give them both a 25000000:1 chance of being banned. Local Uncyclopedian starts up Devil-Worship Wiki By Qua In a recent devil-related press conference. Cartoon Diablo, the younger and sillier version of Diablo. Has started up The Devil's Wiki, a wiki dedicated to worship of Satanism and The Devil itself. In a recent interview, Cartoon Diablo has said personally that "The wiki's going to contain a lot about the devil, no seriously. There's going to be articles about the caverns of hell, the kind of foods the devil eats and also various artworks done by the Devil himself. And if your asking if it's going to be great. Well... Yeah!, It's going to be satantastic!". Immediately after this was posted on the UnSignpost, 2 people have joined the satanic wiki. The 2 people are described to be a Himilianian Yettie and an Male Amish Human. Both of them have pledged their allegiance to the devil in return for absolute power. In today's weather report, make sure to bring an umbrella as Hell may be raining over within the next few days. Uncyclopedia's Reign of the Newbs Begins By Cajek and whoever else Interestingly enough, lots of new noobs (and old noobs) are getting featured articles these days. Somehow, the cult of the newbs has awoken, and Uncyc has felt its presence link to Double Entendre. Oh... did I say that out loud? "I don't trust the young 'uns," said Farmer O'Dell at his grain silo, "They write funny articles, yeah, but what do they contribute to the community?" Actually, writers like Hyperbole, Cheapinitreal, and The Woodburninator have stepped up, and are already commanders. Except that last one, who is close enough. Big time contributors like YesTimeToEdit, Qua, and Orian57 are cleaning up this pig sty. Older members of uncyc have become less active, and are paving the way for these rising stars to shine. Uh, speaking as myself? I've never been more proud of Uncyclopedia than I have in the last month or so. Keep it up, guys!

Check out these pages! Try winning this game U...N...P...R...O...V...I...S...E...! link link From our logs: 00:29, THEDUDEMAN (Talk | contribs) (uploaded a new version of "Image:483922.jpg": <3 you Zombiebaron! ) 20:10, 22 June 2008 TheLedBalloon (Talk | contribs) blocked 58.179.141.146 (Talk) with an expiry time of infinite ‎ (No means *no*) 06:21, 22 June 2008 Zombiebaron (Talk | contribs) blocked .cx (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of infinite ‎ (Oh for fuck's sake) 05:30, 22 June 2008 Mordillo (Talk | contribs) blocked Dunquin (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 1 week ‎ (The Irishg defence forces are a bunch of wankers who were dominated by the brits who are even greater wankers. They eat potatos, drink guinness and fight imaginery wars) 03:42, 22 June 2008 Hindleyite (Talk | contribs) blocked 217.54.74.232 (Talk) with an expiry time of 2 weeks ‎ (Welcome to the jungle, we've got fun and games. ) 12:42, 21 June 2008 TheLedBalloon (Talk | contribs) blocked Page blanker (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of infinite ‎ (I wonder if you realize just how easy your name makes it for me to permaban you...) 07:26, 23 June 2008 Manticore (Talk | contribs | block) blocked 124.170.144.245 (Talk) with an expiry time of 2 weeks (You have been autoblocked by the Uncyclopedia penis-size-detector. Rylie, I'm afraid your penis is too small to edit Uncyclopedia. Please try again after puberty.) 08:48, 20 June 2008 Zombiebaron (Talk | contribs) blocked Bl4nker (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of infinite ‎ (LOL YOU BLANKED SOMETHING THAS SO FUNNIES. Now fuck off, eh?) 18:54 . . Codeine (Talk | contribs) blocked 71.231.38.117 with an expiry time of 1 week: (No, Pete Doherty is a talentless junkie cunt. Deal with it.) 14:59, June 25, 2008 Mordillo (Talk | contribs) blocked KBD5196 (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 2 weeks ‎ (I hope this ban log gets featured in the UnSignpost. Also, you are a wanking blanker. Or a blanking wanker. Whichever.) Gripe of the Week MantiBot, Yes a bot, this bot has been going around causing terrorism to articles in the form of interlinking. Not only does he support terrorism, he also supports the de-opping of TheLedBalloon who has been known to hate every foreign country that's not America on the Planet. What's worse, he isn't even properly marked as a bot. FU Mantiwhore! Foreign Uncyc Page of the Week: Russian Adolf Hitler and the Crappy Translation Quote of the Week: "Listen, here's the story: The other night I saw Jackass the Movie 2 and they extracted sperm from a horse so one of the dudes could drink it. It was that moment when I realized how little I know about nature, or rather, animals and their private parts. You see, it turns out horsies have big ol' peepees, and the first picture I expertly designed was actually close to the reality, and I needed to start from scratch on a new picture. The result of that is what you see on the right, the one with the bigger censored penis." -So So

UnSignpost Main Page • Contact the Editors • Sign Up for Delivery • Get the Userbox

THEDUDEBOT Armed and Ready Say The Word 22:36, 27 June 2008 (UTC)

Hea, {{QVFDc}} and stuff

I noticed that you put {{QVFDc}} onto the QVFD page. Now forgive me if I'm mistaken, but does that not normally mean that the admin in question has checked that all the pages on QVFD have either been deleted if needs be, or if not they possibly place an ICU on them? I noticed that some of the pages which were listed below your tag (in my humble opinion) rather obviously need ICU's if they don't actually need deleting. There was also at least one page there which was the subject of ICU abuse by the author... Hope you don't think I'm telling ya what to do, but I just want to clear this up so that everyone is doing the same thing... I will take care of what needs doing there now, but if you could let me know your feelings about the above that would be cool... Also, I usually don't bother to wait for {{QVFDc}} to appear these days before archiving anyway, so there is probably not really any need for you to use the template here unless you have particular reasons why you think you should. Cheers. :-) MrN 15:56, Jun 28

I knew I forgot something! My browser crashed while I loaded an epic amount of tabs on a piece of shit uni computer, and I didn't restore my session. Sorry 'bout that. WTF is "Hea" though? — Sir Manticore 16:00, 28 June 2008 (UTC)

Hey? It's dried grass. Usually stored by farmers to feed their cattle during the winter months. Hea! Was I trying to be funny? Apparently not. No really. MrN 16:16, Jun 28

Ummm...

I've removed all of those templates that you added to the Uncyclopedia:Maintenance pages because, to me, they seem utterly useless. My clock is not in UTC. Having times in UTC is useless. Everyone should just delete the bold articles. That's why they're bold. -- The Zombiebaron 18:38, 29 June 2008 (UTC)

I have no idea why, but I don't see, nor have I ever seen to my best recollection, the bolding you mention. I only placed the templates there after you complained that I deleted a batch of ICU's a day early. If you're not really fussed by that happening again, then by all means, remove the templates. — Sir Manticore 01:07, 30 June 2008 (UTC)

Mantibot idea?

At other wikis, like the dreaded ED, they have patrolling bots that revert edits over a certain size. Is that possible here?   Le Cejak • <4:53, 30 Jun 2008>

I suppose it's possible, but probably not too feasible, especially for me to host. I think we do pretty well here in terms of managing vandalism, and trust me, everyone only gets pissed off when you bring in some revert bot to do the job for you. — Sir Manticore 07:26, 30 June 2008 (UTC)

Drive by comment... I actually thought about making a revert bot myself based on ClueBot... Using C# actually, and got somewhere with the code... I decided against it though. I'm just not sure it's really needed. For now anyway... MrN 18:05, Jun 30

Reeeaaalllyyy

Did you get a checkuser? ~ 13:51, 30 June 2008 (UTC)

Wait, you aren't subscribed to uncyclopedia-l? — Sir Manticore 13:52, 30 June 2008 (UTC)

Say that again? ~ 13:56, 30 June 2008 (UTC)

The mailing list. I'll link you when I'm done. — Sir Manticore 13:57, 30 June 2008 (UTC)

OK. ~ 13:59, 30 June 2008 (UTC)

Ooh ooh, He's just a banning machine

[[User:|]] has awarded you a cookie! Now go play in traffic.

Put it where you want it, baby :) -- Sir Codeine K·H·P·B·M·N·C·U·Bu. · (Harangue) 15:02, 30 June 2008 (UTC)

You're my favourite. <3 — Sir Manticore 15:12, 30 June 2008 (UTC)

MantiBot

Wikia had this to say:

“ Okay, It looks at though the decision was to link only no to Norwegian wikis.

It appears that Mantibot is using nn instead of no. You might want to leave a message on their talk page about that. Please let me know if you have any other questions and I'll be happy to help.

”

I'm not really sure what's going on, so... good luck! - P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon (Tick Tock) (Contribs) 23:28, Jun 30

Fucking Norwegians. Seriously though, I don't think it'd be that hard to link both no: and nn: to the Norwegian wiki, seeing as other Uncyclopedias seem to be doing so. — Sir Manticore 07:51, 2 July 2008 (UTC)

hi

That page "Masturbating pants". I will work on it again. Sorry, I was busying to help my family for Fourth of July.

Sicilianman 15:58, 4 July 2008 (UTC)

No worries. Would you like me to restore it to your userspace? — Sir Manticore 10:09, 6 July 2008 (UTC)

Thanks

For this... I'm glad someone made the effort to do it. I was on the brink of making that forum myself, but it was so much better that it came from you. MrN 19:54, Jul 5

Believe me, if it had required any effort at all I wouldn't have done it. Seriously though, about time someone did something about it. — Sir Manticore 10:09, 6 July 2008 (UTC)

I have rollback now, cause of that forum! Yayo! Also I'm terribly sorry about the following whore, but you're one yourself, right?! - [10:34 6 July] Sir FSt Don Yettie

Join The CMC! Make Your Inner Cow Happy!

Moo, Manticore!

What is it about cows that gets us all hot and bothered? Where do cows come from? What are cows?

These are the questions that drive the Cow Moo Cult and its brethren, who are very, VERY interested in cows and cow by-products.

The CMC is devoted not only to cows, but to helping Uncyclopedia through general acts of goodness and through motivating people with cow-treats and the like.

So, Manticore, why not join the CMC? It's free (unless you count virginity as money) and it's fun (and it's full of clichés)! You'll get a pretty template for your userpage and a nice title for your signature! What could be better? Sign Up Now!

Double moos from your cowy friend,
YTTE

I'm going to give up being made of fail

I love you, and im going to admit my mistakes, no more saying you suck, or makeing pages dedicated to saying MANTICORE IS GHEY LAWLZ, i am giving up phail, i have admitidly been a total dumbass, so, im admiting my n00nbishness, i ask foregiveness at the risk of my new profile, if u forgive me, ill give you a cookie please forgive me SuperN00b 05:04, 10 July 2008 (UTC) AKA tomers113

UnSignpost: Jewlie 3rd/10th, 2008

The Uncyclopedia UnSignpost

Now with 20% more ninjas!

July 10^th, 2008 • Tenth Issue Spectacular!

Uncyclopedia running out of interesting stuff, UnSignpost starts up shitty telethon! By DJ Irreverent Look at you, sitting there all high and mighty with your Chuck Norris facts and Oscar Wilde quotes, well during this season of laziness and sitting round jacking off, please donate the gift of humor (or humour, we bend that way to no matter how much we are chased out of church) to a poor Uncyclopedian run newspaper near you. Take this poor little article for example; Canadian Tire Money or Canny as no-one calls him, just 8 minutes old and he is already roaming the streets. Illiterate and doing incoherency, long lines of lists and e before i (especially after c), it is only a matter of time before he turns to gay jokes to fund his addictions. Please help this little article achieve its potential as an Injoke by donating the gift of laughter, stupidity... or even just simple bad taste. Successes AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA[complete success]! ~ Annoying Article Fuck not this again... ~ Captain Obvious Free publicity in exchange for; 1) Shitty memes 2) Dragging up shitty memes ~ Euroipods There's more you can do... Call you're nearest admin and start a discussion about just how much humor you can donate (read: swearing and shock-porn), or start the 2717231278th forum topic concerning how we all must strive to remove the scourge of shitty articles. In the immortally misattributed words of our founding fathers, stillwaters and Chronarion "Fuck were we high" er... or words of respected member TheLedBalloon "Also, in the ass or the mouth?" oh dear... or even words of respected member 81.101.207.62 "Hey look a donut". Amen. Our lines are open to your pledges 25/7. Please help Save Cats from Degrading Captions- wait... - Save the Porn onto my Hard-drive- uh... I remember! Save UnSignpost from falling into a pit of lame memes and boring articles, here is a parting word from a little one in need of YOUR help. Ry4N IS TEh GH3Y n00b whO SUX b4lls!!1 ~ Ryan kella Makes you think don't it? We will be taking your calls now. Or now. Not now. Ok, now. Modusoperandi OP'ed!? By: THEDUDEMAN This past month of June, the Uncyclopedia community got its first chance at VFS since February, and one new op was decided upon. While there were many great and very capable candidates, one in particular got the most attention and the most votes. Modusoperandi. This long time Uncyclopedian has been to VFS almost every time it gets opened as far as we can trace, and always misses it in the final round by a slim number of votes. However, this month turned out to be a winner for him, so congratulations Modus. MO likes to spend his time writing things and 'chopping some images, but also finds time to goof off in the forums, and relieve the everyday pressure of his fellow colleagues with his off topic sense of humor, which he rarely hides. Modus has a total of 19.5 featured articles as well as 10 featured images. We at UnSignpost congratulate Modus on his winnings, and are willing to put $10 on him becoming the next STM. UnSignpost Takes A Wikibreak By: UU Yeah, the UnSignpost, the newspaper that Uncyclopedia would totally fall apart without, took a wikibreak last week. They seem to be fashionable, so we thought we'd find out what they were all about. They seem to involve time spent not hunched over a keyboard in a darkened room. The UnSignpost reminds you that such activities are hazardous to your health, and should be avoided at all costs. (Note: this is absolutely true - in no way did the UnSignpost just miss a week because no-one could be bothered to edit it, or anything)

Check out these pages! Colonization? CMC? Is that some new kind of drug? Rollback: Privilege or Curse? Dimwits beware Cajek launches attempt to kill Wikia servers? From our logs: 19:56, 30 June 2008 Olipro (Talk | contribs) blocked Codeine (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of a sloppy wet blowjob ‎ 19:42, 30 June 2008 Codeine (Talk | contribs) changed group membership for Modusoperandi from (none) to sysop ‎ (I asked on IRC for a funny reason tto put here, and no-one could come up with one. Losers.) 22:39, 30 June 2008 Codeine (Talk | contribs) blocked 80.42.211.35 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 week ‎ (Blanking articles will not compensate for your small penis)) (Block log); 18:54 . . Codeine (Talk | contribs) (blocked 71.231.38.117 with an expiry time of 1 week: No, Pete Doherty is a talentless junkie cunt. Deal with it.) (Huff log); 18:21 . . Modusoperandi (Talk | contribs) (huffed "Hate Crew official fan club": Shock to the page/and you're to blame/baby, you give stubs/a bad name) (Huff log); 20:12 . . Mordillo (Talk | contribs) (huffed "Cabal/Cabal9": content was: 'there is a cabal' (and the only contributor was located and executed by the cabal. There is no cabal) (Block log); 22:30 . . Mhaille (Talk | contribs) (blocked User:Revel4tion with an expiry time of infinite: and on the eight day he fucked off) 10:58, 8 July 2008 Modusoperandi (Talk | contribs) blocked 72.95.139.248 (Talk) with an expiry time of 2 hours ‎ (You partly piss me off. The rest of me is in love. I'm torn. Come back later. I hate you. I love you!) Biopic of the Week MrN9000 ~ One of the more "seasoned" users on Uncyc, at a sprightly 360 years old, MrN was bitten by a pair of radioactive Y-fronts in his youth, bestowing upon him the awesome power of pants. Fortunately for us here at Uncyc, he decided to use those powers for good, and he is now our reigning king of poop, featured author and amateur tap dancer (hea, a man can have more than one hobby!) Quote of the Week <Codeine> here's a thought <Codeine> If you download music, supposedly you're damaging the music industry <Codeine> but <Codeine> if you download childporn, you're *supporting* the childporn industry <Codeine> I'M GETTING MIXED SIGNALS <Ljlego> moral of the story: <Ljlego> childporn is the way to go <zombieninja> XD <Run-DLL> thanks for the moral go-ahead Crappy deleted Stub of the Week "this chocolate is blue. and it has a BIG GREEN PENIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#" - From Blue chocolate Reason to take a Wikibreak of the Week (Admin Special) "You dream that you're being deopped after being called "The Bloody Admin" (as in that one whose hands are drenched in user's blood). Yes. Yes." - Mordillo

UnSignpost Main Page • Contact the Editors • Sign Up for Delivery • Get the Userbox

THEDUDEBOT Armed and Ready Say The Word 06:29, 12 July 2008 (UTC)

You.IRC.Now

kthxbi ~ 10:58, 12 July 2008 (UTC)

You win, happy now?

ok, ill stop doing anyting, you win. i give up. -tomers113 – Preceding unsigned comment added by 99.148.31.47 (talk • contribs)

Win... what? — Sir Manticore 10:13, 23 July 2008 (UTC)