New York Knickerbockers
The New York Knickerbockers, sometimes known as the New York Knicks, and are called the New York Knickers by snooty British haters when they are struggling, is an NBA team located right in the heart of the Big Apple in a "world famous" arena named after the favorite food additive in Chinese and Japanese restaurants. For years they were a distant last place in NBA attendance figures this season, largely due to their jaw-dropping ineptitude on the court. But their management does not think they need to assemble a winning team to get people to come, they believe they simply need to concoct the most irresistible promotion that mankind has ever devised. So for the remainder of this season, the team has no plans to win any of their games, as winning is a silly idea anyway. Instead, Knicks management has devised a series of innovative promotions that are certain to fill their empty world-famous arena. In fact, after almost sniffing the Finals for the first time in 25 years, they kicked the head coach who got them there to the curb,intent on sucking ass again. With these amusing and novel ideas, the Knickerbocker's management expects the games to be more entertaining than ever. They encourage fans to show up in huge numbers, and to lose any notion of witnessing quality basketball when they do.
History[edit | edit source]
It all started in 1946, in which basketball started to become a regular thing across New York City, though the sport was new to many. Many people would use a hockey stick to play baseball with a basketball. Many hockey sticks had to be fixed that year. But on June 6th, 1946, a basketball team was founded called the New York Knickerbockers. Nothing noteworthy happened for two decades besides some "minor" team reshuffling and a better organized group. That ended in 1966 in where throughout the following decade the Knicks would have win after win against team after team. Then nothing ever happened after that for the next decade, except for loss after loss. Patrick Wing showed up after that decade, and essentially carried the team through games. So when he left in 2000, panic roared through the team. That was the era of downfall, much like every other team at the time for some reason. Then nothing ever happened, because nothing ever happens.
Notable rivalries[edit | edit source]
It is a well known fact that any person, no matter age, from either Boston or New York, will have a very noticeable hatred for each other, and if either one is put next to each other, they will actively kill the other person. This well known fact continues on into the age of basketball, as the Knicks and the Barely Celtic Bostonians have a very clear rivalry. It is also known that although God can be humble, he can also do a little trickery. Thus, in any moment he can, he will make it so that the Knicks and the Bostonians will have to face off against each other. In any case in which this happens, speakers will tell casuals coming to the place to "please, leave the area, and drive until you are no longer in a 250 meter range of the stadium". The die-hards who will do anything to make their team win will stay calm for about a round, but as soon as the game reaches its climax, people will run into the court and punch each other out until the court becomes a boxing ring full of knives, baseball bats, and blood.
You can take the previous rivalry and take that to the extreme, because even a one hundred ninety mile separation won't stop violence to occur, especially not in sports. The Knicks also have a hatred for the Brooklyn Nets, located in the same city as the New York Knickerbockers. Although this may seem that they would have less of a hatred, in 2004, after the Knicks lost to the Nets in the play-offs for their first time ever, it was reported that the city went into so much turmoil that Manhattan and Brooklyn left the city and became their own country for a day.
